The Inviting Shift Podcast

S2 Episode 2: Discovering Joy in Midlife Career Changes with Genea Barnes

September 07, 2023 Christina Smith Season 2 Episode 2
S2 Episode 2: Discovering Joy in Midlife Career Changes with Genea Barnes
The Inviting Shift Podcast
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The Inviting Shift Podcast
S2 Episode 2: Discovering Joy in Midlife Career Changes with Genea Barnes
Sep 07, 2023 Season 2 Episode 2
Christina Smith

Ever feel like your career ladder has turned into a hamster wheel? What if you could turn that feeling of dread into anticipation and excitement? That's exactly what we'll uncover with our esteemed guest, level-up coach Genea Barnes. Specializing in helping individuals navigate midlife career transitions, Genea is a beacon of wisdom for those considering a leap into entrepreneurship.

We kick-start our conversation by exploring the pivotal signs indicating it's time for a change. You'll get to understand how our survival instinct often pushes us towards growth, and yet, how complacency can lead to unhappiness. As we plunge deeper into the dialogue, we grapple with the fear of leaving behind prestige, money, and time investments for uncharted territories. Genea introduces us to the process of identifying our true passions and skills, and the importance of resilience during this transformative journey.

Transitioning isn't just about the change, it's about finding purpose and clarity. That's why we dedicate ample time to discovering what brings joy and fulfillment. You'll learn strategies to transition your brain from 'prevent and protect' mode to a stage of creativity and problem-solving. We wrap up with useful tips on creating a vision for your future and broadening your problem-solving perspective. Get ready for an honest, transformative conversation on personal growth and career fulfillment with Genea Barnes. Tune in, this could be the start of your best career move yet!

ABOUT Genea Barnes

Genea Barnes teaches small business owners and entrepreneurs to be more efficient and profitable in their businesses by helping them streamline their workload, time, and decision-making.

Her custom state-of-the-art system, which she used to save her own business from financial ruin, is based on 20 years of experience, study, and training with leading experts.

Genea has helped hundreds of people take their businesses and lives to the next level giving them time freedom, healthy live-work balance, and financial breakthroughs. She believes that when you feel good about who you are and what you do, you evolve humanity.


FREE GIFT From Genea:

3 Secrets to Maximize Time and Increase Profits that the Business Gurus Won’t Tell You! Get it here.


CONNECT with Genea

Website | Linkedin  | Facebook | Instagram | TikTok | YouTube | Podcast 


CONNECT with Christina & Inviting Shift on Social:

Instagram  |  Facebook  |  LinkedIn

Email me and tell me what you think: christina@christina-smith.com
 

Don't forget to rate & review!

 

Tune in wherever you listen to podcasts:

Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Ever feel like your career ladder has turned into a hamster wheel? What if you could turn that feeling of dread into anticipation and excitement? That's exactly what we'll uncover with our esteemed guest, level-up coach Genea Barnes. Specializing in helping individuals navigate midlife career transitions, Genea is a beacon of wisdom for those considering a leap into entrepreneurship.

We kick-start our conversation by exploring the pivotal signs indicating it's time for a change. You'll get to understand how our survival instinct often pushes us towards growth, and yet, how complacency can lead to unhappiness. As we plunge deeper into the dialogue, we grapple with the fear of leaving behind prestige, money, and time investments for uncharted territories. Genea introduces us to the process of identifying our true passions and skills, and the importance of resilience during this transformative journey.

Transitioning isn't just about the change, it's about finding purpose and clarity. That's why we dedicate ample time to discovering what brings joy and fulfillment. You'll learn strategies to transition your brain from 'prevent and protect' mode to a stage of creativity and problem-solving. We wrap up with useful tips on creating a vision for your future and broadening your problem-solving perspective. Get ready for an honest, transformative conversation on personal growth and career fulfillment with Genea Barnes. Tune in, this could be the start of your best career move yet!

ABOUT Genea Barnes

Genea Barnes teaches small business owners and entrepreneurs to be more efficient and profitable in their businesses by helping them streamline their workload, time, and decision-making.

Her custom state-of-the-art system, which she used to save her own business from financial ruin, is based on 20 years of experience, study, and training with leading experts.

Genea has helped hundreds of people take their businesses and lives to the next level giving them time freedom, healthy live-work balance, and financial breakthroughs. She believes that when you feel good about who you are and what you do, you evolve humanity.


FREE GIFT From Genea:

3 Secrets to Maximize Time and Increase Profits that the Business Gurus Won’t Tell You! Get it here.


CONNECT with Genea

Website | Linkedin  | Facebook | Instagram | TikTok | YouTube | Podcast 


CONNECT with Christina & Inviting Shift on Social:

Instagram  |  Facebook  |  LinkedIn

Email me and tell me what you think: christina@christina-smith.com
 

Don't forget to rate & review!

 

Tune in wherever you listen to podcasts:

Christina Smith:

Welcome back, shifters. It is a new week with a new guest, and I'm so excited to have Genea Barnes here with us. She is a level-up coach for entrepreneurs. So when you're thinking in midlife about, like, what is it that I want to do next, or how do I up level my business, or how do I know that I want to open a business, Genea is going to be able to help you level up that entrepreneurship, and I know so many women in midlife are on this journey because, tired of working for other people, they want to be able to do their own thing, thing that they're passionate about. So thank you so much, jenae, for being here with us today to talk about this.

Genea Barnes:

You know I'm super excited to be here.

Christina Smith:

I have so many things to say Well, first of all, tell us a little bit more about you and what it is that you do, so that we have a clear picture.

Genea Barnes:

Okay, so, as you said, I'm a level-up coach for entrepreneurs and I work mostly with women and I really help entrepreneurs to maximize their time and profits so that they can take their business to the next level. A lot of times, a lot of women who want something different in their life and they're ready to jump into entrepreneurship, they're tired of working for other people, they're like I've had it, and so they take that leap and a lot of times they have success in the beginning and then they hit this place where things are not working or moving forward. You just hit this plateau, and so I help women to break through that plateau and, ironically, you know a lot of what's going on in those places is some of the things that keep you in those jobs that you hated in the first place, that you got into entrepreneurship to get away from.

Christina Smith:

Yeah, I get that because, being an entrepreneur, I can tell you there has been a lot of times where I'm like maybe I should just go get a job. I feel like I'm putting in so much effort and not getting enough back. And luckily it's been a while since I've thought that. But I think that there's so many things that people at least women that I work with they wander in the middle of their life like do I really want to be doing this for the rest of my life, whatever they're doing their job and our parents raised us at least my parents did and a lot of Janet's parents did but you could get that paycheck, you get the pension and that's it. You just suck it up for 40 years or whatever right and you just do the dang job or you stay at a specific job for 30 years or 40 years.

Christina Smith:

And I think that not only has the younger generations been changing our minds on this right, because there's all these like new ways of creating income that isn't a job. But we're getting all these ideas and we're starting to get like, at least in midlife we get a little unsettled and we're like, really, is this what I'm gonna do? Like I'm just paying the bills. At least that's where it came to. For me, it was like, yeah, I'm paying the bills and, yeah, I could be grateful for that, and I cried on the way to work for a year, even though my job wasn't that bad. It like the people I worked with were great something in me just had me crying for a year, and after about a year I was like maybe there's something wrong here, maybe there's something else I'm supposed to be doing. So how do we know when it's time to consider for more, for like to maybe make that leap into entrepreneurship?

Genea Barnes:

well, it's not always about entrepreneurship. It's really about finding your fulfillment, and before I was a coach for entrepreneurs, I helped women in career transition. I helped women find jobs that they love and feel good at the jobs that they're currently in, and so I have a lot of experience with this like transition of career. But one of the things you nailed it on the head when you said well, you're feeling like you want to cry every day, even though things are like they're fine enough. Right, there's that place of being fine enough.

Genea Barnes:

So some people are really hate their job and they have a terrible boss and all of those things and they and they need to leave. But what happens is they keep popping to another job and they keep having the same problems and so making those transitions just blindly, and you know, the only solution most people think about is, oh, I get another job is not necessarily gonna be enough to stop that feeling. You might get two years in and then you're crying again. I know, for me I would feel sick to have my stomach before work was a big one. So little things like your physical body will tell you.

Genea Barnes:

But the bottom line is is for the human being, for the human spirit, to be happy, you have to be growing, pushing, expanding. It is a survival instinct for us. It gives us, like the best dopamine highs and dopamine was literally like created in our system to keep us motivated to evolve, to get better, to grow, because it's a survival mechanism. You know, as we evolve we are more apt to survive. Right, our, I think, life expectancy is around 80 years old, whereas you know, 30, 40 years ago it was 60 ish, 65 ish. So you know we are evolving, but so often, like you said before, the gen X generation were raised by boomers and depression era people who just wanted you to be safe. Just just do the job, put your head down. You can be happy when you retire and what happens is people stop pushing for that growth for that individual like expansion and challenge.

Genea Barnes:

you're just put your head down, you do the thing and people become more and more miserable. So if you're not in a position that is challenging you and pushing you to grow, you're probably starting to have some depressive stuff and subconsciously you start to feel not so good about yourself. Because you know, remember, the whole participation trophy thing was such a great idea. Everybody gets a trophy. But the thing is is subconsciously you know if you didn't do your best and if you get a trophy for not doing your best.

Genea Barnes:

It doesn't make you feel good about yourself and you know you get on all the personal development things and you're looking at all the thought leaders. Everyone's talking about feeling like you're enough and loving yourself and all of those pieces. And when you're not pushing and doing your best, you start to feel like you're not good enough and that's just a natural reaction that happens within people and it starts to create feelings of not feeling good, not having joy, not enjoying what you do. Our, one of our greatest, greatest joys is the joy of achievement and if we are robbing ourselves by putting our head down and not pushing forward and growing in our life, we are robbing ourselves of joy.

Christina Smith:

I've heard somebody say that when we're not growing, we're dying. All things are either growing or they're dying. And like when you look at nature, just the cycles of nature, like we have the bloom and then we have the summer flowers and then they die off and it's like they were growing, growing, growing, and then all of a sudden they start wilting when they stop growing. And I think that's kind of how we work as people, even though a lot of us are like, oh, I'd love a job flipping burgers or whatever, and that'd be so much easier. Yeah, for a moment, right, I mean, but we wouldn't wanna do that forever, probably, unless there was like some other challenge, like working with people that we can grow with or whatever. So I think that you're on to something here, because we really need to be growing.

Christina Smith:

When I'm not growing, I feel I get into that really depressive kind of stuck space where nothing makes sense and nothing's good, rather than feeling really accomplished. And by feeling accomplished, I think what I wanna bring up it doesn't mean that you have to go cure cancer or do some like major thing. It could just be opening a side business and it might be changing jobs or careers. However, I love that you brought up the people who are like serial job jumpers, right, and it's like, because you're not really clear on what you actually want out of it. Or they think, oh, I have a terrible boss here, I'll just go get a new job. Well, you might not have a terrible boss there, but you might have a terrible coworker, or the conditions might be too much for you, or they might expect you to work 80 hours a week, right? So just treating in one one I don't like this, for another I don't like this Isn't always going to help, but I think that's where coaches like you and I come in, where we can really help them start drilling down to let's get clear on what you actually want, so that we can fulfill the real problem, not just the symptoms of the problem, which I think is where a lot of people go.

Christina Smith:

So I love that you said that our body will tell us. Our body will tell us when it's time to go, and that's definitely where I got to. I think one of the things that we don't do, though, enough is to listen to our body when it is telling us something, and that can be like one of the many reasons why we don't explore more right Like? I know that there's people who hate their careers, but they're like but I went to medical school. Like I became a doctor. I'm the first one in the family to have a college degree. There's no way I could leave my job now. And it usually comes down to this I make too much money or I've invested too much time to start over now. And what would you say to people like that?

Genea Barnes:

Well, that is a big one, right? I'm afraid of what I'm gonna lose. I don't know what I could gain, I have no idea what's on the other side, but I'm afraid of what I'm gonna lose. And here's the thing. You know, we of course, have attachments to things, attachments to prestige, attachments to what people think of us, and that's all pretty normal. And when we are willing to let it go, that's a big indication that you're taking the right step, whatever it is.

Genea Barnes:

I remember, you know, when I made the switch from helping people through their career transitions and job transitions and all of those things, to working with entrepreneurs. And for me it's funny because, even though I was working with these women in their careers, half of my clients ended up being entrepreneurs. They just kept finding me. I was like, okay, I'm listening, I'm listening. But I remember walking down the street when I was making the decision. Right, it's like, okay, I have to basically pull back everything in my business, start it from scratch in many ways and build it up again. And one of the things that I noticed was well, now I'm walking down the street, I'm like, you know, I'm attached to my apartment here in New York. I love New York it's. I wouldn't want to go anywhere else and oftentimes my family is well, why don't you just leave New York and go someplace else, Like someplace else that's cheaper and blah, blah, blah, whatever. You know the story they have in their own mind about what's right for me. But I remember saying I would give up my apartment and I would give up New York to make this work. So if you're willing to give up something you love to make something work, it's a really good indication, it's a good step for you. Now, hanging onto those things oftentimes you know, are the pieces that will prevent us from having the joy, having the things that we love.

Genea Barnes:

If I went to medical school, then I put in all this money this time, this effort, and would it all be a waste? But the thing is is you get to take the resilience, you get to take the dedication, the consistency, the work ethic, all of those things. You get to take them with you and you get to create something new for yourself and for some people. I just wanna say this you know that job flipping burgers or whatever for some people they've been riding so hard and so fast that their body is in a state of stress and overwhelm constantly. So for some people, taking a very menial job for a year or two, just so their nervous system and their body can settle out, so they can actually start to notice what their body's telling them, might be a really good step. But when you're ready, you know we live in this time where we can create the business we want. That fills our heart. It's like that's who you're born to be, and you get to collect all the things you've ever done in your life. You have this beautiful mosaic of your life and you can create something new with it. You don't have to keep doing the same structure over and over and over again.

Genea Barnes:

And you know those stories that they told us about working 40 hours in a job. It's not even possible anymore, it doesn't. The average person has, I think, 12 jobs in their adult career and three to seven career changes. So and that's just average. See, you can't run that old program anyway. It's not going to work. You're going to have to put yourself out there, and that's a big reason why a lot of people don't do the job transition. Yes, the money, of course, and the security, but what often lies underneath that is putting themselves out there. It's like standing on a pedestal and saying, do you want me? And it feels very vulnerable and it's very scary at a deep level, and so that's probably even more the true reason why a lot of people don't make those changes or don't go after what they really want.

Genea Barnes:

I know for me way back when it definitely was, but of course I thought it was the money.

Christina Smith:

Money is security for us, like we equal those things to be the same in a lot of our brains, and you said a few things, but I would just want to point out one is this whole like. Now I have to start over, and we're never really starting over, though, are we? Because, like, no matter what I did before I was in marketing, before I became a coach like, there's skills that we can take with us. There's ways that we learned how to communicate better with people that we're taking with us. There's a lot of soft skills that are being taken, but it could also be I organized a calendar for someone Well, great. Now I can organize my calendar Great. So we're not really starting over. There's a lot of, I think, transferable skills that we just don't see, but those are the things.

Christina Smith:

Like. For me, it was like well, what parts of my job do I really like? Well, I like talking to people, I like when I help them fix their problems, I like when, you know, I like to teach, and so that's, you know. All of these things I had to start looking at, like, what are the parts that I really love, and what is it that I don't love? Not meaning it's hard for me, because a lot of things that are hard for me are the things that I actually love. Like I love a good challenge, like how you said, like achievement is a big thing for us. As much as we wish we were just like nature and just kind of like hanging out every day, just finding food and shelter. There is a part of us that likes to achieve things, that likes to, you know, take those things off our to do lists and everything if they're feel worthwhile. And the other thing that you said that I think is really important so if you see me looking away, I'm just taking notes because I have a menopausal brain that rest is important. Taking that menial job might be great for you. It might be that your body needs rest and wherever, whatever you're doing right now is way too stressful for your body, and I know none of us want to admit that because I was really sick for a long time and I was like, how can I be sick? My job's fine, that's fine, that's fine. But it was like all of the stress I was putting on myself to make sure that all of that stuff was getting done. Sure, could I do it all, yeah, but my body sure has held it and want to do it. And I was just constantly in that masculine energy of like pushing forward, pushing forward, pushing forward. And I love how you say you know, maybe if you need a moment like I've thought about this many times Maybe I just need a year or two like volunteer at the dog shelter, full time or something, or get like a low paid job, doing something that will bring me joy or at least less stress, so that I can be more clear when I move forward, so that I can really start thinking about what brings me joy, what is less stressful or the right balance of stress, right, that I can move forward.

Christina Smith:

I think a lot of people don't see rest or slowing down as an important part, but that I mean again, if we go back to nature, when the flowers aren't getting water, they're not going to bloom, right, and that's okay. That's their dormant stage, that's them going. I'm going to grow bigger in a week when we get a storm or whatever. So that we can start understanding that rest is actually part of the process or slowing down, even if you don't rest. But slowing down can be part of the process and I think, a really important process, because in order to get into that intuitive spot of ourselves right, our own inner wisdom, we kind of have to slow down, because when we're really, really busy, we're not really hearing all of the wisdom that our body has to offer us, which I think is really important, because it is important that we keep exploring.

Christina Smith:

My husband talks about retirement all the time and I'm like I don't know what language that is. I can't imagine. I can't imagine the time in my life where I'm going to be like, yeah, I'm just going to rock in this chair all day and that'll be great. Maybe if I have grandchildren or great grandchildren. That'll change if I find other things to do.

Christina Smith:

But I want to be passionate and growing and constantly, not constantly doing something, but constantly feeling like I have this purpose or I'm clear on who I am and how I want to get things done or how much stuff I want to get done.

Christina Smith:

So for me it's like constantly exploring. I have this business, which I plan on running for the rest of my life, but there's also other things that I have like, ooh, I would love to sell art because I have so much of it. Right, I would love to do this, I would love to do that and I think that's one of the reasons why I always am constantly exploring. But I know that there's a lot of reasons of why we need to keep exploring. I see so many people who, like they retire from their job and they're so excited about retirement but like a month in they're like now what Right, because they never took that time to do the exploring while they were still working. Then I think that that's an option, right? How many people start an entrepreneurship while they're still working full time, but a couple hours here, a couple hours there?

Genea Barnes:

Yeah, there are so many things in what you said. One of the things when we talk about rest and that balance. Now, your creative brain cannot work. It cannot function when you're stressed. So if you are in a perpetual state of stress because you've been achieving and go, go, go, there are signs You're trouble sleeping. You wake up and your brain starts spinning and what happens is your brain is constantly in prevent and protect mode.

Genea Barnes:

So I have to prevent myself from losing this job.

Genea Barnes:

I have to protect my family, and when you're in that space, you are literally like a warrior ready and your focus is very narrow and to create something new in your life that's going to be different than what you've ever had.

Genea Barnes:

You have to open your focus and you cannot do it from a state of feeling like you're lacking anything. So if you're worried about not having enough money, enough security, enough time, that's all a state of lack and you cannot access the creative parts of your brain which will give you the roadmap to creating the joy that you want. And so, yeah, whatever you need to do to get the nervous system to calm down, if it's, take six months off. If it's, you know, pull back on time. But when you're looking at that next job transition and this is what happens so often it's like oh, I get laid off, so then I have to prevent and protect, make sure that the whole panic mode right so you end up getting another job just like the one before, because you can only recycle what you've already done when you're in prevent and protect mode.

Genea Barnes:

You cannot create something new. So if you're wanting a career transition, you've got to allow yourself to get creative and really feel into what you want. And you have to do it anyway, even when your system is like five alarm fire, like no, don't do that, Don't start a business, it's going to, you're going to fail if we fail. So that place of really allowing yourself to dream and feel into what's right and not listening to the parts of you that are trying, they're just trying to keep you safe but you cannot create something new from those places.

Genea Barnes:

You will only repeat what you've done before. So you'll trade one crappy job for another crappy job. You will start a business and ultimately you'll end up having the same problems, except they'll be compounded, because now everything is on you. You can't blame it on the boss, you can't blame it on anybody else.

Genea Barnes:

And that's why a lot of entrepreneurs lean into coaching more so than people with regular jobs because they're like I'm going to lose everything unless I figure this out. So you've got to step into it. And also that same thing why you get in and you may have some level of success with your business and then you hit this plateau and you can't get it past is because you're brain, you're just recycling the old stuff to do. To do something, to get something new and different. You have to do something new and different. So if you're in protect and prevent mode, it's not going to happen.

Christina Smith:

I love that so much because when I went into business for myself, I was like I'm going to go into business for myself, I'm going to take hikes on Fridays, I'm going to be able to do whatever I want, I can make my own schedule. But I had the same mindset, so I was still working 50 to 60 hours a week because now I was justified, it was for me right, and so I started that pattern again of putting myself in so much stress. And I think that what's really important to mention while we're because I talked to midlife women hello, midlife women, perimenopause and menopause and the discomfort that we have. I have anxiety much higher than I ever had before, moments of anxiety where it's much higher. It just happened to me Sunday and now, looking back at it, I can see that it was because there's this major decision I had to make in my business that I knew was going to upset some people and other people not so much. But I just so anxious around this one decision and I also knew that when I'm an anxious kind of state, that is not the time for me to be coming up with solutions, that is not the time for me to be fixing things. In fact my husband, like I, used to tell him I was anxious and he would come up with all these questions and I'd be like whoa, please stop with the questions. I'm feeling anxious already and what I've learned is I don't make any decisions and I don't have any deep thoughts when I'm in that anxiety period because I do not get anywhere. So coming and starting a new business or looking for a new career or a new job just because you're having an anxious moment is probably not the best idea. What we have to figure out is like what's causing that anxiety? Right? Because Sunday I would have pitched my business and been like that's it, it's too much work, but it's because I was in the wrong state of mind to be thinking about it.

Christina Smith:

So once I calmed down, I made this big decision. Today I woke up and I'm like, oh, I feel so much better. But that wouldn't have happened if I didn't get to the point of what you said, of calming down my nervous system and going we're safe, we're fine, the world is fine, my client's chasing me, we're all good, and bringing that nervous system down, and then I could make a solid choice from a solid place, from a grounded place, rather than I'm in panic. Now I got to just grasp at whatever it is, and I think a lot of people do this when they're in that panic stage, when they're deciding what it is that they want to do for their business.

Christina Smith:

I know people were like, oh well, I really wanted to do this one business, but that just seems so hard. So it'd be easier just for me to become a social media person or to use this skill that I had before and just do that, like do web development. I know I wanna do art or I wanna do this other big business. That seems very different than me, but this is more comfortable, so I'm gonna go there.

Christina Smith:

And then what happens is they get into this business and they realize that they're not that passionate about it. Yeah, they can do it, but they're just trading that one meh for another meh because they didn't really jump into what it is that they really really want and what they're actually passionate about. So how do you help your clients get clear in a space that feels good, rather than from that panic spot Cause I'm certain that you must have clients. Like you said, I just lost my job. Yes, I gotta start a business, but you know I should use my old skills that I hated using, rather than doing this thing that I'm passionate about.

Genea Barnes:

Well, just because you can do something Like years ago I was a bartender and I was really strong and I could stat kegs in the keg room and I used to. After a little while, you know, I wanted to prove myself and after a while I was like oh, just because I can do something doesn't mean I should do something. So, even though I was strong enough to do it, it taxed my body and opened me up for possible injury at a much greater rate than the guys that were, you know, eight inches taller than me and massively more strong than me. So, first of all, just because you can do something doesn't mean you should. But I can share this is you know, if you're in total chaos, panic. This will take a lot longer to do, but I can share a little trick with everybody for helping you make decisions or helping you come up with solutions, and this transforms your mind a little bit so that you can see things from that broader perspective.

Genea Barnes:

That's gonna give you, the more creative solutions. Do you wanna do it with me? Yes, I do. Okay, so everybody like pick a spot in front of you slightly above eye level, just a dot could be a spot on a wall, could be a branch on a tree, wherever. It is like stop for a moment, sit down and really focus on it and now that's your problem that you're trying to solve and really pour all your focus into it. Like that spot is everything the only thing you're aware of and think of it as you know. If it's, I have to figure out what to do next in my life and you're just focused so hard on that problem you're. You probably get that little crease in your between your eyes cause you're just so focused on the problem and now just slowly start to expand your vision the periphery, like, just widen your vision so you can still see the spot.

Genea Barnes:

but now, like you can see, like the things that it's almost like you can see wrapped around behind your head. Your vision is so expansive, you see the spot and your vision is so expansive. And just hold that position and start to allow the information to come in. So there'll be learnings that'll come in, or maybe an inside or an aha, and just hold your gaze in that place with that expanded vision and start to allow the possibilities to come in. And you can do this, for you know, sometimes you'll get an insight in 30 seconds, sometimes you'll get like 10 insights over the course of five minutes.

Genea Barnes:

But just staying in that expanded view, because you know the reality is we get what we focus on. So when you're in that expanded view and you've put that problem as a tiny little dot, but now you're focused on everything, that's not the problem which allows the new information to come in. And what happens usually is we are so focused on the problem that we can't see anything else. And so if you're in just sort of a mild place of stress or anxiety, just sitting in that position with your vision expanded, like that will help to calm you down a little bit and start to allow you to see things that you couldn't see when you were so narrowly focused on the problem.

Christina Smith:

Yeah, yeah, that's a really great trick. I think that's really important. It was funny too, because I was like staring at this little spot on my blinds I don't know why it's there and now I'm like, oh, I should clean that, that should be cleaned, and right, like my brain can go into the like fixing it mode. But once I expanded, it was like there's so many other colors in my room and there's like a lot of other joy, and I think that that really just sums up how we can get so hyper focused, like this thing is a problem rather than it just is right. And how big of a problem is it? This spot is like really tiny compared to how big my room is and it's like, of course, if we're zeroed in on that one challenging spot, it's gonna feel like the whole room is a challenge. But if I can really start seeing that, how much more is involved, it really lightened it up. Great trick, jena.

Genea Barnes:

Yeah, well and also you can take this like in an expanse of time as well, because right time is such a big piece that I focus on with people.

Genea Barnes:

We think like, oh, my God, I have to get this done, I have to get this done, I have to meet my deadline. And then, oh, you're just like so full of like anxiety about it. And then if you stop and think like, okay, I know this is important and I'm gonna keep working towards it, in five years is this thing gonna make a difference in the grand scheme? If I finished it in one hour or two hours? Yes, and when you can look at it from again, it's a more expansive view. And you're like, okay, maybe it's better that I slow down and take an extra day to do this, because maybe it's a foundational piece for my marketing or my strategy, or maybe it's my resume. If I'm gonna look for a job or writing a cover letter, like if I just saw the job posted right now and now I have to write a cover letter and doodadadadadadadadadadada, oh right, gotta be the first one in, you know.

Christina Smith:

Right.

Genea Barnes:

I'm the first one in, but if you had written it and then slept on it and revised it and then sent it, your chances would be better.

Christina Smith:

I love that so much because that is so true in my business and I used to be like, here's a deadline, have to meet. It said I was going to finish this today. So then like, and I hear the words like done is better than perfect, and I believe that there's something in between right, like, yeah, I can get it done, but like, if it's lead magnet or something for my business, am I going to be doing that again in two months Because I didn't like the way that this turned out or I didn't give it enough energy? It doesn't really feel like me. Like, is this something that I'm just going to do over and over again Because I'm not giving it an extra 20% of time now? It means that I'm going to have to give it 400% in the future. And so, like, really starting to slow down and get into that more feminine energy of like, does this feel right? And you know, in that calm space of like, does this feel right? And I can't tell you how many times in the last year I've changed things because they didn't feel right for me.

Christina Smith:

I had one webinar that I was doing twice. The first one, I did it how a coach told me with all these slides and did all the things and it oh my God, it's like slide by slide. By the time I was done with that webinar, I was like something doesn't feel right about this for me, like it just doesn't feel right. And if you've ever been to one of my webinars, most of the time they're more experiential and less like. Let me show you a bunch of slides. And so the second one I did completely I was like I need to throw that out and just figure it out. And there was a part of me I was like you're too busy, you don't have time to figure this out, just do what you said you were going to do, right, but instead I got a lot more intuitive about it and I did something a little bit more experiential. It gave the same point and it was. It felt so much better in my soul.

Christina Smith:

So I think that there is something to be said about it feeling really good. And we can't get to that point, like to your point. We can't get there when our nervous system is on high anxiety or, you know, high stress, because we're only seeing that one dot like what is the problem? Rather than seeing, like, all of the opportunities of like, oh, how can I make this my own then, rather than like always looking for the right answer externally, which is where I tend to go when I'm anxious like somebody else must have the answers, because I don't. And it's like I do. If I could calm the hell down.

Genea Barnes:

Right, well, and that's the piece, right, focusing with that perfectionist, like trying to get it done. That perfectionist thing is hyper focused on the problem, right, I noticed at this period out of place and oh my goodness, I forgot to put a two in my like something and freaking out about that kind of stuff. But that's again that narrow focus. So when you can pull it back and make it, make it done, well, but from the expanded, bigger picture of what you're trying to create. So you know, if those women who are looking for a career transition and you're figuring out your resume, you're figuring out how to write the best cover letters and all of those things, you've got to look at it, not this particular job, but what is the job I'm trying to create, what is the situation I'm trying to create. So, looking at it from a bigger perspective for your business, one of the things that really sucks up people's times they're doing all these strategies, all these strategies. Oh, my goodness, I have to write a newsletter every week, or two times a week and I don't know what to say, and blah, blah, blah.

Genea Barnes:

But what a lot of business owners don't. They don't even know how to write copy and that actually creates the impact and the result that they're trying to create. They just know they're supposed to write a newsletter and they don't under. They don't know why. They think it's just. You know it's so.

Genea Barnes:

People will get to know, like, know them and like them and whatever. But they don't understand the strategy, the bigger strategy. So they're doing all these little tiny things all over the place that they don't have any understanding of the bigger concept, of how it all fits together and they're wasting a ton of time. It's yeah, it's so amazing when you break this stuff down for people and you get to really like look at what is the purpose of this and where does it fit in. Oftentimes some of the strategies are great, but maybe they're not accurate for that place of business right now. Maybe it's a strategy for you know, two years ago if you're not, or two years from now if you're not bringing in the income that you need right now, focusing all your time and effort on your social media social media is a long game if you don't have social media built up. So spending a lot of time that you could be working on something that would bring you income to create beautiful posts is not a great way to spend your time.

Christina Smith:

I love this and I think it leads right into your your freebie, that you're offering a free gift. So tell us a little bit about that.

Genea Barnes:

Well, this is simple. It's the three secrets to maximize time and profits that the business gurus are not going to tell you. Right, they'll tell you all the strategy. You're probably trying to do all of them all of the time and spread so thin, but there's a few secrets in there and so you can get this at iDeserveThisGiftcom. So, if you're listening, just do it. Open up your browser type in iDeserveThisGiftcom. It feels good to type it in right and sign up and grab that. Grab that guide. And if you're a business owner and you're doing most of the work yourself, this is definitely going to support you.

Christina Smith:

Beautiful, beautiful. I love this conversation so much. The biggest thing I have gotten from it is that to be really grounded when we're making these decisions and not doing it from a place of panic, which it can be very easy, especially when it comes to money and business and all those things that we a lot of us have wounds around or shadows around, and so just making sure that you're in a really connected place with yourself when you're making these decisions. And if you're not, you can always check out Jenae's links below and just check out some more of her stuff so that you might want to work with her, just have a conversation with her to see how you can get more grounded so that you can make these really good decisions, and then she's going to be able to help you level up as an entrepreneur, if that's the path that you choose. If not, I'm sure she's got really great references for people who can help you in other areas as well. Thank you so much for being here today, jenae. I really appreciate you.

Genea Barnes:

Thank you, this was fun. I could talk about this stuff all day long, I know.

Christina Smith:

I know If only people would listen to podcasts that were 10 hours long, right. And finally, yeah, hopefully y'all got a taste and we talked about you know when it's time to explore more and what you can explore more, and I've loved Jenae's little trick about looking at the spot and then opening your vision, so hopefully that trick will help you as well. I hope that you'll try it a couple times this week and see how it works out for you. But thank you, shifters, for tuning in. We'll see you again soon.

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