The Sugar Daddy Podcast
Ready to normalize talking about money? Then welcome to The Sugar Daddy Podcast. Every episode will get you one step closer to your financial goals. Whether that is learning how to invest, budget, save, retire early or simply make better money choices, Jess & Brandon have got you covered in a way that's easy to understand, and easy to implement. Tune in as they demystify the realm of dollars, so it all makes cents, while giving you a glimpse into their relationship with money and each other.
Brandon is an award winning licensed financial planner, and owner of Oak City Financial, with over a decade of experience and millions of dollars managed for his clients all over the United States.
New episodes published the first three Wednesdays of every month.
The Sugar Daddy Podcast
77: Rip & Rant on DE&I, Relationship Disconnects and Etiquette
In this episode, Jess and Brandon tackle the critical issue of diversity, equity, and inclusion (DE&I) in the current socio-political climate, debunking myths and misconceptions surrounding these initiatives. They emphasize the importance of understanding DE&I as a framework that benefits everyone, while urging personal reflection on inherent biases.
Brandon also challenges the men who are resisting financial advising, when their spouses are clearly asking for help and looking for support.
Lastly, they discuss recent happenings in Brandon’s financial planning business. From the unengaged, to prospects expecting favors and beyond, this is a conversation you don’t want to miss.
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Learn more about Brandon and schedule a free 30-minute introductory call with him here: https://www.oakcityfinancial.us
Every time I come to these meetings where you have that separation of one person really wanted to help the woman and the male being like we don't need help, they need help. I see the numbers. There's never been a time where I'm like, oh no, you're right, you don't need any help. No, every time they need a lot of help. And I'm going to speak to men on this one. Let that pride go, like that pride of I can fix this is killing you because it's okay to not know something. No, it's dumb to not know something. Realize you don't know something and then do nothing about it. That's dumb. That is the opposite of being a man.
Speaker 2:Hey babe, what are we talking about today? Make them pockets grow. Financial freedom's where we go. Smart investments, money flow.
Speaker 1:Hey babe, what are we talking about today? Well, today is another Rippin' Rant and first Rippin' Rant we're going to talk about is DEI.
Speaker 2:You've been waiting. You've been Rippin' and ranting.
Speaker 1:I do have a lot of opinions about this the middle of january, and january was long yeah, as most of you know, basically every single dei program and every single company across the country is under attack or has already been dismantled, and the reasons behind why they're being dismantled. That's what we're going to talk about because, honestly, for a lack of, I think it's crap. It's crap. The reasoning behind it is just crap, it's lies, you know racist lies yeah, because, well, let's first start.
Speaker 1:Let's take a step back. Let's first define exactly what dei actually is, for maybe some of you guys that don't know. Dei stands for diversity, equity, inclusion. It is basically a framework aimed at fostering workplaces, organizations and communities that embrace and support individuals from diverse backgrounds and identities. The main DEI initiatives they often focus on policies, training and strategies that promote a more equitable and inclusive society or workplace. So listen to that definition. I don't understand how anyone could one be against it based off the definition to begin with, and when people are against it. It leads me down two different paths. One, you either are ignorant and you don't actually understand what DEI is and what it does and the purpose behind it, or two, you're racist.
Speaker 2:I saw something yesterday, I think, that said when somebody like, if you're in somebody's presence and they say that they're against DEI, ask them which part Is it that they're against diversity? Is it that they're against equity or that they're against inclusion or all of it? Is it that they're against equity or that they are not qualified for which is garbage?
Speaker 2:Secondly, if you're going to say something about or against DEI, Say it with your chest, then Say it with your chest first off and then also say it Like what part are you you don't like equity, you don't like inclusion, you don't like diversity? Which part do you not like? Let's talk about that Instead of giving it this like blanket statement where you can kind of hide behind it. No, people need to start getting called out for what they you know are posting online or whatever it might be like. Tell me so I know which part of DEI you don't agree with.
Speaker 1:I also don't like this new age racism. I call it bitch assness racism. Be honest with you, because at least back in the day people owned the racism. They did racist things, they said racist things and when you call them a racist they were like, yeah, I'm a racist. Nowadays people do racist things, say racist things.
Speaker 2:But don't want to be called a racist.
Speaker 1:But when you call them a racist, they're like I'm not a racist and they get all hurt and cry about it. I'm like, no, don't do racist things and people won't call you a racist. It's very simple.
Speaker 2:It's pretty basic.
Speaker 1:And so one of the things we really want to talk about is the myths behind DEI, with a very obvious one that most people have is that they think dei dei lowers standards when in reality it does. The doesn't do any of that. If anything, it actually raises the standards. Most people, like just said, think that dei is black people getting jobs that are not qualified for. What dei does is forces people in some aspects to look at qualified people that aren't white males.
Speaker 2:That's all it is that's what it is like. So you have the bucket of cisgendered white men who are used to owning everything, being in charge of everything, and d and I helps eliminate only white men being interviewed for jobs. That's what it is, yeah, so Give everybody else a chance.
Speaker 1:I kind of equate it to for those individuals that are football players, that are into football, it's the Rooney Rule. So the Rooney Rule in football came about because you have a league that is like 70 to 80% black athletes and barely any black coaches. So that should tell you something. Athletes and barely any black coaches, so that should tell you something. And so the Rooney rule applied that you have to interview a certain number of black applicants for a head coaching job. You don't have to pick the black applicant, but you do have to interview them. And there's a reason behind that because one, it's opening the opportunities for other people that are just as qualified. So you're not just looking at group A over here Now, you're looking at B, c, d, all the other groups as well to find the same qualified applicants.
Speaker 1:Now, also, what happens in these scenarios is that, even if a black person doesn't get the job, they now know the process. And we all know that part of also interviewing for jobs assuming you get higher up is understanding the process so that you can improve. If you don't get the job, if you don't understand the process, or you have the opportunity to even go through the process, you don't even know what you need to improve on to go through it. And so that's what DEI is for the masses. It's not unqualified people getting jobs. Now, is there a potential for an unqualified person to get a job? Yes, just like there's a potential for unqualified white men to get jobs. Same thing.
Speaker 2:That's literally been happening for centuries. Look at our president.
Speaker 1:Like, in all honesty, like, look at our president and for anyone out there that maybe voted for Trump and is listening to us, do you think if Trump was the exact same person, everything, exactly the same. Only thing you change is that he's a, a black man. Do you think he'd be president?
Speaker 2:no, like, if you don't lie to yourself, he wouldn't be it's very obvious he wouldn't have even made it to the ballot, he wouldn't be allowed to step foot in dc yeah, I mean come on and that's the thing behind dei.
Speaker 1:and like, I have heard this same argument since I was in high school, you know, with the whole idea of affirmative action. I will not say the person's name because I just don't remember who was in high school, but I was in a class where someone was talking about affirmative action and how it's making it hard for them, as a white person, to get into college, and I simply called them out. I stood up in the little class and I said what is your SAT score? What is your current GPA? Here I'll go first. Here's my SAT score. Here's my GPA. Here I'll go first. Here's my SAT score. Here's my GPA. Guess what?
Speaker 2:Mine were higher. Have you been listening to our podcast and wondering how am I really doing with my money? Am I doing the right things with my investments? Am I on track to reach my financial goals? What could I be doing better? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then it's time for you to reach out to Brandon to schedule your free yes, I said free 30-minute introduction conversation to see how his services could help make you the more confident moneymaker we know you could be. What are you waiting for? It's literally free and at the very least, you'll walk away feeling more empowered and confident about your financial future. Link is in our show notes. Go schedule your call today.
Speaker 1:And that's the problem is that people keep pushing this narrative, and what I honestly want to say is I'm going to call it out it's a mediocre white man pushing the narrative to make themselves feel better about not getting a job. That's really what it is People that think they should get a job just because they were white aren't getting a job, and they have to find some way to justify it in their mind other than that, hey, the other person was more qualified than you and they just happen to be black.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there was another thread that I saw. It was actually on threads and it was a black female physician who had a heart to heart with a colleague. Did you see?
Speaker 1:it, I did.
Speaker 2:And basically, you know, this was a white colleague who was able to have this kind of a constructive conversation about DE&I and affirmative action etc. And they basically sat down and they talked about you know, what kind of school did you go to Like? Where did you go to high school? She went to an inner city school. He, of course, went to a prestigious, very expensive private school. Where did they go to college? What did they study? What was their GPA? What kind of you know internships did they do? Et cetera, et cetera, and at every single stage she had higher scores, higher GPA, and she did this all coming over to the United States, not speaking English.
Speaker 2:I think she came when she was like 15 years old 15 years old, not speaking English, you know, having kind of the deck stacked against her with where she went to schools the schools that she applied to. She went to schools the schools that she applied to and it really showed that because of DE&I she was able to actually get the interviews. Her grades warranted her being there. But without these rules and laws in place she could have easily been passed over. And so basically at the end of the thread he acknowledges you had way more obstacles to overcome and you did much better.
Speaker 2:My, my scores were not the way yours were. My GPA wasn't what yours was, even throughout medical school. She beat him every single step of the way, which is why I mean, they're both now physicians. But she basically said she was given the opportunities because DE&I, this framework, you know these laws, these rules were put in place. And let's just be very clear even though this administration, the undertone of DE&I is black people, brown people, yellow people, anybody that is not white, that is what they are considering DE&I. But the reality is is if you are a woman, you are DE&I. If you are over 40, you are DE&I. If you are deaf, if you are blind, if you are in a wheelchair.
Speaker 1:If you are a vet.
Speaker 2:If you are a vet, you are a DE&I quote, unquote hire and so we really need to be cognizant of the buckets we put people in, because if you're in a wheelchair and the building that you're going into has a ramp access for you to access that building with your wheelchair, that is because of a DE&I initiative. Without something like that in place, a building could just say nope, you need to figure out a way to get in here without actually having access for your wheelchair. That's insanity.
Speaker 1:What's insanity also is, for example, the governor of Texas.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:Who is voting against DEI? And he's in a wheelchair. Literally they have access because he's in a wheelchair.
Speaker 2:I mean, how vapid can you be? It's really embarrassing.
Speaker 1:And the thing is too. I can tell you from experience that if you have a minority, and, more specifically, if you have a black woman that is in a higher position, for example, a manager, vp, executive, whatever, above you, I guarantee you. I guarantee she's twice as qualified to be there.
Speaker 2:Right? Well, and let's just make something very clear Black women are the most educated demographic in the United States. Black women have the highest percentage of secondary degrees in the United States, which makes vis-a-vis, ergo concordantly, black women the most educated demographic in the United States. It is not white men, it has never been white men, and this is why we need D and E and I to ensure that people who are not just cisgendered white men have access to education, have access to be sitting in rooms that we deserve to be in. How is it 2025? And this is a conversation that we are having.
Speaker 1:It's a conversation that's all been around. I mean like, for example, I mean my mom is a retired college professor, phd, had her master's at 21 years old, and you know. Another perfectly prime example on par with this administration is that I've always said it and I can explain it that the Supreme Court justice, katonji Brown Jackson, is the most qualified justice on the court based upon work experience. She is the only justice on the court that has Supreme Court clerking experience, public defender experience, sentencing, commission, district court judge and court of appeals judge. She's the only one that has all of those on her resume. She is hands down the most qualified person, but people try to say that she was not qualified enough because she's a black woman. She's not a DEI hire.
Speaker 2:She is the most qualified person in that building.
Speaker 1:If anything, the DEI hire is Amy Comey Barrett, who did not have any of this experience. Well, she has some of it, but most of it she does not.
Speaker 2:Well, and not the tenure. Oh no, I mean she barely was.
Speaker 1:She was a judge for two minutes, that's it.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, we understand that being qualified in this administration is not something that anybody values. The country has voted this way and what's really sad is that there are so many qualified people that without D, e and I are just not going to get the opportunity to sit at the tables that they deserve to be at. And what's more terrifying is that the people who are more than qualified to be in the roles that they're in are now going to be questioned even more than they have been previously to see if they deserve to be there. And again, the stats are there. I mean, nobody else questions the nepotism or the fact that you know somebody is hiring their son, their cousin, their whatever in their family, their country club buddy, as long as they look like cisgendered white men and they're like, this is this is nothing against white men. This is against people who don't understand that there are people in this world who need opportunities to present their skills and without DE&I, that is not going to happen. And the fact that they want to demolish, shut it down, rip it out that, I think, is really terrifying.
Speaker 2:And the people who don't understand, again what it means. Right, if you are a nursing mother and maybe your building has a nursing mother's room. Guess what? That is a DE&I initiative. You want to go back to pumping in the bathroom stall, pumping in your car, pumping in some broom closet with chemicals, because that's what this is going to be. This is what's going to happen. These initiatives help people live, work, function in the spaces where we live, work and function. That's what it is.
Speaker 1:Also, at the end of the day, it does come down to dollars, because several studies show that diverse teams outperform homogenous teams. If you have a team full of white cisgender males, they only have one perspective. For the most part, they only have one perspective. So when you start to diversify that team and you have people from different backgrounds, you're going to get better ideas Like if you don't understand that you are not at the top of the game. I'm just like, you know, like, if you don't understand that, you're going to fail in the long run.
Speaker 2:I mean, if you look at Fortune 100, fortune 500, if you look at these large corporations even the ones, sadly, that you know decided to just throw DE&I out the window as soon as they were legally able, the ones that have diverse boards, the ones that have diverse executive leadership they are always outperforming those that do not, for the reasons that Brandon just mentioned. So if you want to have a company that is successful, then you hire people that don't look the same, don't have the same background, don't have the same skill sets. You are looking for people to fill the gaps that you might have, that your neighbor might have, that the third person at the table has. You're trying to build out a, you know, a group of people that really can speak to and fill the gaps of who's in the room.
Speaker 1:Also, too. The whole myth of this is reverse racism. First of all, there's no such thing as reverse racism, because reverse means opposite, and the opposite of racism is what we're going for. So I would love to have reverse racism. It means no racism, so the term itself is stupid. I hate that term. It's such a dumb term. But the idea is that it's about fairness, not favoritism.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:And that's what it is. We are trying to move away from the favoritism and open the door of opportunity for everyone who's qualified.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, I know you and I both talked about this, but again, threads is a pop in place right now and I'm really it this like. I know it's part of Instagram, but it is my favorite place to be on the internet right now. But there was a thread by a cisgendered white pilot and he basically detailed all the things that you have to go through in order to get your commercial pilots license and actually be hired by, you know, the Deltas, united's, americans of the world, and then basically, at the end, he was like any black, brown, yellow person that is flying a commercial airline or any kind of airline where passengers are paying to be is there because they are qualified. You do not become a commercial airline pilot because of a DE&I initiative at a company, because you were hired because you are not qualified. That just doesn't happen. So all of the people who are out here saying oh, so-and-so is not qualified and that plane crashed because no, no, boo-boo, that's just not a thing. Stop trying to make fetch happen. You wrong, you are wrong.
Speaker 1:I mean also. The thing is, too, is that you have to think about this way Black people make up roughly around 15 percent of the US population. Now take into account that also includes children and people that are too old to work. So cut that percentage down drastically more. White people still make up 60 to 65 percent of the US population. White people still make up 60 to 65 percent of the US population, and it's always been. You know the ploy of let's blame it on the smallest percentage of people in the in the make up the population. They're the problem.
Speaker 2:Like if you are, if you are a white person and I am a half white person. My mom is German. I grew up in Germany Extra half white.
Speaker 2:Brandon likes to call me extra white. Okay, so this is not a black and brown. This is not that Okay. I want you if you are a white person, I don't care what gender you are If you are in a space, I want you to look around. You live in the United States. I want you to look around that space and I guarantee you you will be able to count, depending on how large the space is. You will be able to count, maybe on one hand, maybe on two, how many Black people are in that space. I will tell you, as a woman of color, when I go into a restaurant, I can see my fellow brown people.
Speaker 2:We were at swim lessons the other night with our kids, one hand with fingers to spare. How many black and brown kids were on that swim team? While our kids were doing their lessons, how many black and brown parents were in the bleachers? Yeah, look around. Look around when you're at the park with your kids on the weekends. How many black and brown families do you see? You will. I guarantee you you will be able to count them on one or two hands Next time you go to a birthday party, next time you show up to volunteer for your kid's class. I just want you to open your eyes and look around you. As a white person, are not the minority.
Speaker 2:You are not, not even close, and the fact that you've probably never had that thought of. Oh, I'm in a restaurant. How many people look like me in this space? That is your privilege and I'm not saying you need to feel guilty about it. This is not me coming at you for any other reason, except for pay attention to the spaces around you and recognize that as a white person, you were always in the majority in that space. Look at the nail salon, look at who's in line at the grocery store. You are not being outnumbered.
Speaker 1:I mean previously, a previous financial planning firm that I worked at. We had a really good CEO and he was really open to having these conversations. And he went with a group of us probably about 15, 12 to 15 black advisors and we went to a conference in Atlanta for African-American financial professionals and he came down and so we're sitting in the room all at the table you know everyone's at the conference and we said to him we said have you ever been in a room where you're the minority? And he was like no, this is probably one of the first times I can recall. Um, but uh, he was in a room full of black people and he had never experienced that before. And we said to him you know the way that you feel right now.
Speaker 2:This is our everyday life every day, every day, which is why I mean there are conferences for women in tech, blacks in tech.
Speaker 1:And it's not about exclusivity. That's the problem. It's not about being exclusive.
Speaker 2:But you know, I will say there is something so powerful and comforting and energizing when you are in those spaces and you are surrounded by people that look like you. Now, again, as a white person, you get that all the time you go to the conference, most everybody's going to be white. That's just how it is. But the few times that we do have an opportunity to be in these spaces, it matters. It's just like when you go to a conference that's focused on women, maybe it's focused on mothers, maybe it's focused on the book that you're currently reading, right Like there's community in that and it's very powerful and it's comforting and it's energizing and you know it's something that's very, very valuable and we don't have a lot of that. And so all that to say look around the spaces that you occupy and figure out are you in the majority or the minority? And DE&I is focused on bringing opportunity to those who are qualified to at least be in the room, to be given a shot, to get the interview, to have their resume read.
Speaker 1:That's it.
Speaker 2:That's it. You still have to do the work, you still have to be qualified. But think about all of the times and you know, especially again if you're a woman think about how many female executives make it to the top, especially at these large companies. It's very minimal, and it's again because we are not given an opportunity to even be in the room. That's what this is giving. It is not a handout, it is not a freebie, it is not a pass to be uneducated and underperforming and unqualified. It is none of those things. And if you are walking out in the world with that in your mind, we need you to pick up a book, we need you to read a qualified article and we need you to pick up a book. We need you to read a qualified article and we need you to do better also.
Speaker 1:The thing is too, is that, um, if your first thought when you see someone get a job and maybe you didn't get it in their person, of color per se, and your first thought is, oh, it must be a dei hire, you're racist. If you don't know anything about that person and you automatically assume, just because they are not white, they are not qualified for the job, you are racist and you automatically assume, just because they are not white, they are not qualified for the job. You are racist and you need to do some changing to yourself.
Speaker 2:Or at least some inner reflection.
Speaker 1:I'll make it a little bit more gentle. No, you're racist.
Speaker 2:There needs to be some introspection on why that is your first thought.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because you're racist?
Speaker 2:Why is your default? We all have biases, we all have our own experiences and, yes, for some of us they are rooted in racism. But again, do the work, have some introspection and think about well, why was that? My first thought?
Speaker 1:You're nicer than me this time.
Speaker 2:I'm trying. I'm trying.
Speaker 1:Normally I'm the nicer one sometimes, but this one 20, 25, I'm calling this time. I'm trying.
Speaker 2:I'm trying, Normally I'm the nicer one sometimes, but this one 2025, I'm calling you racist.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry, I'm done. I've done that for years where you try to have the conversations and stuff like that. I'm over that.
Speaker 2:I know.
Speaker 1:Society doesn't dumb itself down to idiots. You're just going to be left behind. That's how.
Speaker 2:I feel, okay, let's move on to our next rip and rant, because I know we can talk about that forever.
Speaker 1:All right. So next, rip and rant is something that I've seen in my own experience throughout the years. Honestly, a little bit more recently is that I would say honestly I believe all the clients that I have that are a couple, you know, married couple, a male and a female. The woman is the one that actually reached out to me.
Speaker 2:All right, To schedule the appointment.
Speaker 1:To schedule the appointment as far as all the ones that have as clients, and I've also noticed a trend of the women reaching out to me and their husbands not being on board. So, therefore, I'm sitting in a meeting for the first time, you know, speaking to these individuals, and it's very obvious from body language and within one minute of the conversation, I can tell us right away that the woman is the one that's like hey, we need help, and the man is like I don't think we need help. And it's always funny because, like, part of my process is is that I asked to um to fill out a questionnaire that provides me with a high level overview of what your current financial situation is and then provide me some information about, like, some of the things that maybe you're looking to have help with. So it's not like I'm going into the meeting blind without knowing any numbers. So every time I come to these meetings where you have that separation of one person really wanted to help the woman and the male being like we don't need help, they need help.
Speaker 1:I see the numbers. There's never been a time where I'm like, oh no, you're right, you don't need any help. No, every time they need a lot of help and I'm going to speak to men on this one. Let that pride go, like that pride of I can fix this is killing you because it's OK to not know something. No, it's dumb to not know something. Realize you don't know something and then do nothing about it. That's dumb. That is the opposite of being a man.
Speaker 2:Well, I think too, because when these things happen, brandon never tells me you know, I don't know any names, I don't typically know details, like he, you know, obviously keeps all of that information private. Um, but he'll come down and he'll be like, oh, you know this, this guy wanted me to convince him that he needs a financial planner. Like I'm never going to do that. Like, if you are coming to Brandon and you say or roundabout way, or like well, tell me, tell me why I need one, he's going to be like you're on the wrong call, like hop off of the zoom, because I am not the one.
Speaker 1:If you're looking at the same numbers that I'm looking at and you don't realize, you need help. That's a you problem.
Speaker 2:Right, well, but also how awkward that I mean it's. I'm sure it's embarrassing a lot of times, especially in some of these situations with the women who are like very clearly like no, no, we're not All right, we don't got this. Like we need a third party who does this for a living to help us. Like we need some handholding, we need some guidance, we need to get these questions answered. And the guy is like no, we're doing fine and you're literally putting college tuition on a credit card it's sad you're not fine.
Speaker 1:It's sad to listen to only because, like I said, there's areas like there's areas that we all lack information or ability to handle. There's there's tons of things I don't know and understand, but one thing I think I'm pretty good at is saying that I don't know and I have no problems reaching out for help in areas that I need help in, and it's just terrible to see these scenarios because it's the same, literally it plays out the same way where the woman looks distraught, upset, embarrassed, and the man's sitting there looking stubborn and from my viewpoint, he looks stupid. And I don't mean stupid in the sense of like from an education standpoint. You look stupid in the sense of you don't understand how your wife feels.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that's so sad.
Speaker 1:Everything is about communication, so this isn't even like you know. This goes far beyond finance. If you're listening to your wife talk about a problem that she has and it's a problem that you know you guys have and you guys have to work together to fix it and she's like this is a problem, we need to fix it, we need to work on it, we need help from somebody else and you're ignoring it. You have an issue in your relationship in general that is far beyond finances, because you are not communicating properly and you are not respecting and hearing your partner.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know some of the some of the stories. Again, I don't ever know names or any of those details, but some of the stories I'm just like you know. Oh, you probably wouldn't even want to work with them because it sounds like they need a lot of help in other areas before you know you start tackling cash flow and investments Like it really sounds like you should be talking to a counselor and you know a financial planner.
Speaker 1:I've wanted to say that, but I don't say it in those words because that's not my place.
Speaker 2:But, and honestly, all these scenarios, I would 100 work with the wife because they seem to always be lovely people who are looking for genuine help and are open to that and understand that they are in a place where, man, we really need support, and it's only going to get worse and the men are like I'm immediately like I don't want to work with that person like because they probably don't want to be married to that person it's just, it's just.
Speaker 1:It's. It's rough to watch, man. Like it's just extremely rough to watch because I know where it's going to go if they don't get on the same page. Like it's not going to get better all of a sudden. And it's also like. Also, another thing is, too, is this is just anyone that reaches out to me. If you're going to set an appointment with me, make sure that you have 100 percent attention on the meeting. If I'm talking to two people and I see one is doing work, I automatically don't want to work with you, because that is the rudest thing ever. I give you my time. You give me your time. That is so rude.
Speaker 2:But that's also indicative of like they don't want to be there or, you know, like If you can't, Well also.
Speaker 1:Schedule at a time that both of you could sit there and be attentive.
Speaker 2:Didn't somebody recently ask you what you know, Like tell me what you know that I don't know? Yeah?
Speaker 1:I was like I don't have all month to sit here and talk to you.
Speaker 2:Like I mean that's also. I mean, do you not say like okay, if you're not a doctor, like maybe that's not?
Speaker 1:a good example. What I said to the person was I said to them right off the bat I was like I'm not here to convince you that you need a financial advisor. I said you need to come to that conclusion on your own, and it doesn't sound like you already have.
Speaker 2:But how rude. This is what you do, 40 plus hours a week. This is what you study, this is what you take exams for, this is what you attend conferences for. This is what you do for your clients every single day of the week, to the tune of multi-million dollars, portfolios across your clients. Like how rude to say that. Tell me what you know that I don't know. Like you wouldn't do that to me. You know for my work, right? Like why would you go and do that? Like this is what this is your profession.
Speaker 1:Also the thing is too at the end of the day, you scheduled the meeting. I didn't Well, it was the wife, technically right. Still the same thing. Y'all reached out to me, yeah. So also the thing I take it in stride only because I feel as though I do my best to interact with people that are extremely intelligent in a variety of ways, not the standard traditional book smarts. I like to be around people that are smart in all different varieties of ways, and one common thing I've seen is that people that are intelligent don't act like that.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:And so you already tell me a lot about your own personal intelligence, your own ability to have growth. You tell me a lot from a comment like that.
Speaker 2:Just a PSA, in case it still hasn't resonated. Brandon is never going to spend time convincing you that you need to work with him, or any financial person. No-transcript. Yeah so you need to come to that conclusion on your own.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm here for those individuals who have figured out that they want help. They need help and they want help and now they're just simply looking for the right advisor that fits them, and I have no problems answering answering any questions around a fit. Like I just said, all those questions are valid, great questions. I love to answer those questions so that you can understanding of who I am and how I work with my clients, but I'm not going to sit here and try to convince you that you need an advisor to begin with, whether it's me or another one.
Speaker 2:Oh, there's another rip and rant. I think that you almost forgot is. So in if you're gonna, if you're thinking about reaching out to Brandon, which of course we hope you do. You know, we provide a ton of free information in our podcast and our newsletter.
Speaker 1:But I also need to get paid.
Speaker 2:Well, yes, but but as part of his process, the you know you have to fill out your the questionnaire in order to schedule a meeting. And if you are not comfortable sharing high level information about your financial situation, I mean, he's not asking you for your social security number, he's not asking for bank account numbers statements. It's literally like do you have a 401k? What is the approximate balance? Right, do you have a savings account? What is the approximate balance? And it's really just to kind of again not go into the conversation blind, but if you are not comfortable sharing a high level picture of your financial situation, you need not apply, because what kind of conversation are you going to have for 30 minutes when you can't share? If you have a 401k, like what do you want to talk about?
Speaker 1:Yeah, the purpose of the purpose of getting that information is to, when we have a conversation, to tailor it to your specific situation, the things that are going on in your life, the things that you need help with, so that you can have a much better idea of what it would be like working with me for your specific situation, not some generic idea.
Speaker 2:And I do want to be clear this is not a weed out process, right? Brandon is not. Maybe he will one day get to a point where he's like, hey, I don't work with anybody who doesn't make a million dollars, right.
Speaker 1:Well, I'll say this the thing is, it's not a weed out process. Now, granted, I can see sometimes, for example, like if your income is below a certain level, the reality is that, more than likely, it doesn't make sense to work with me because I would be too quote unquote an expense for you in regards to how much you bring in. But the thing is, I still take the meeting and I give you action steps.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because you have turned people away.
Speaker 2:I feel like in the last couple of months you've actually said, hey, I don't think you're at this point. Or here are a couple of things that I think that you can work on in the next six months and I'll reach back out in six months. Or or, you know, hey, you're not an ideal client for these reasons, because Brandon could take your money, but that's not who he is as a person, and so he has been turning people away for all sorts of reasons in the last couple of months and always has, but I feel like it's been maybe because people are listening to the podcast and they now know your personality and they want to work with you, but he's never going to take your quote, unquote money if it's not a right fit and he can't help you be successful in helping you reach your goals, whatever those goals are, because they're different for every person.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean like I had a meeting the other week where, you know, based upon their income, they were kind of, you know, a little bit below where I would like them to be from a comfort standpoint of being able to add me as another line item of money that's coming out of their pocket and in comparison to also like how much they had, they didn't have nearly enough of emergency funds saved up and I was like you know, that monthly fee that you paid me, that'd be much better serve putting it each month into your high yield savings account to build up that emergency fund. So, like I said, I don't just see these information on the on the questionnaire and say I'm gonna cancel the meeting. No, I have the meeting with you, even if I knew beforehand that you're probably not going to be a good fit, because I also provide you with action items that get you to a point where then it maybe it makes sense for us to work together.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I just wanted to call those things out. You know, like you have to. You have to do your part too in order to have a fruitful conversation and to understand. You know what your financial situation is and what goals you have, because that's really where Brandon is going to start this process is what are your goals? What do you need? Now, that's different than if you're like, hey, I need some life insurance, can you do that for me? That's a that's a very different conversation.
Speaker 1:And that's a transactional yeah.
Speaker 2:But if you're coming, you know, if you're coming, you know if you're coming which again, by the way, psa brandon can do life insurance, disability insurance, all those things, um, but if you're actually looking for true financial planning, you know, then you're gonna have to do your part.
Speaker 2:You're gonna have to fill out that information and he's not gonna bend your, his process because you had somebody recently that you know kind of refused to put that information in. But then, well, I have this amount of money that I'm looking to invest and kind of felt like it was like trying to dangle the carrot kind of thing and you were like that's great, like everybody that I think is good that I would recommend is going to have a similar process, because we all want to make the most out of your time and ours to see if this is a fit. So don't ask people to change their process. Either find somebody else or go with the process that Brandon has been building out or whoever has been building out for their career and understands why this is important. And they do it the way they do it for a reason.
Speaker 1:Also. The thing is is that, like I said, part of my process is getting that information and then we have a 30 minute meeting you know sometimes runs a little bit longer depending on what the scenario is and I know without a doubt that after that 30 minute meeting with me, once you provide me with your information, you are going to be in a significantly better place from a knowledge standpoint of what you need to do with your finances than you were part of that meeting and I didn't charge you a thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So either way, I need to get paid at some point so that I can forward my lifestyle and we could pay for our house and our kids and all those things. But that's a free 30-minute meeting and I guarantee you you will get the value out of that and I give you that for free.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean I've seen some of the follow-up emails you've sent to people who were not a fit and I mean you could be charging for that information. I will say that. So, anyway, mean you could be charging for that information? I will say that so anyway.
Speaker 1:But when it comes to the couples and the woman wanting to know that they need help in reaching out and the man not being on the same page, you might want to take a look at our dream framework yes, dream, dive, reflect, engage, act, manage.
Speaker 2:We have an entire episode on it because there's there's clearly a communication breakdown there. So, you know, for those women who have men who are being prideful, who don't want to take the meetings, who don't want to get outside, outside help.
Speaker 1:Ooh, sis, I'm really sorry that's going to make things really difficult, um, like, I said at the end of the day it meant like there's nothing shameful about getting help. Nothing at all. We cannot be experts in all areas.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:All you guys out there that have, you know your nine to fives, your job, your careers. I don't know how to do your career. I don't do that 40 plus hours a week, but you do and that's your area of expertise. This is my area of expertise. Let me help you guys.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all right, I feel like we could be ripping and ranting about so many other things but let's let these people go the world's crazy right now, man.
Speaker 2:It's crazy. Y'all protect your peace, protect your boundaries, turn off the news, find joy, do something good for your body, for your mind. I know I'm trying to do that every single day because it's a lot out here. So thank you all for listening. Share this with a friend. We'll talk to you soon, don't forget. Benjamin Franklin said an investment in knowledge pays the best interest. You just got paid Until next time. Thanks for listening to today's episode. We are so glad to have you as part of our Sugar Daddy community. If you learned something today, please remember to subscribe, rate, review and share this episode with your friends, family and extended network. Don't forget to connect with us on social media. At the sugar daddy podcast. You can also email us your questions you want us to answer for our past the sugar segments at the sugar daddy podcast at gmailcom, or leave usa voicemail through our Instagram.
Speaker 1:Our content is intended to be used, and must be used, for informational purposes only. It is very important to do your own analysis before making any investment based upon your own personal circumstances. You should take independent financial advice from a licensed professional in connection with or independently research and verify any information you find in our podcast and wish to rely upon, whether for the purpose of making an investment decision or otherwise.
