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In this episode, we are setting the record straight and debunking common misconceptions about introverts. Contrary to popular beliefs, being introverted and being shy are neither the same nor mutually exclusive.
Join us as we unpack the unique strengths and qualities that introverts bring to the table and explore how being an introvert can create deeper connections and leadership skills.
Whether you're an introvert looking to understand yourself better or an extrovert wanting to appreciate the introverts in your life, this episode is packed with valuable insights.
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In today's mini episode of Not Nice Clever, we are talking about all of the misconceptions about being an introvert. Kat and I get DMs daily from people saying, my gosh, you're probably not really an introvert. Tell us the truth. Introverts can't be on stage and talk like you guys or have a podcast like you guys. And there's just so many misconceptions. And a lot of them are coming from other introverts.
So let's just clear the air today and talk to you about misconception versus reality of being an introvert. Yeah, I love this because yes, we get those DMs all the time. And I think the biggest one is that people think that introverts are shy or kind of like socially awkward.
I think that was totally true when I was younger, but that's not because I was an introvert. That was because I didn't have a sense of self. I didn't have great self -esteem and self -confidence. I do now, but what is still true is that I'm not shy and it's not the socially anxious or awkwardness. I just know when I walk into a room full of people or I know I'm going to be at an event surrounded by a ton of people,
I need to be super strategic in how I move through the room and who I spend my time with so I don't get stuck talking to that one person for like 45 minutes and then I have no energy left for anybody else. So it's not the I'm socially awkward. It's the I'm trying to socially, I'm trying to be strategic, right? Because I only have a finite amount of energy. Like the moment I arrive at the event or in a public setting, like the battery is already starting to drain.
So like that's what's in my mind is like, do I use my battery wisely? Do you, do you feel the same way Candice? I know I am. I'm not shy, but I can be socially awkward and I do suffer from RBF. You do. Yes, I do. but I just can't do the small talk because small talk is going to drain my energy. If you want to talk about something real and exciting and next level,
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I'm all for that. That does not drain my energy. That recharges me. I want to talk about possibilities and not obstacles. I love that. And I agree with that too. And nothing makes me happier when somebody comes up to us at an event and they're like, okay, so I know you hate small talk. So here's what I've been going through. And I love that you're going through it too. And like, can you share some tips about how you navigate that? I was like, I feel so seen. Thank you. Yes.
Me too. I want to give you the right next step. So ask me the question that you don't want to ask me because it's like too business like or it feels like you're yeah, I want I want to give you a free consulting session in that encounter. That's going to make me light up. So another misconception I think that people have, especially with how I just framed that first misconception is that introverts don't like people.
And y 'all, that's not true. I just, y 'all just drain me. I love you. I understand I'm socially wired to want to be a social human being and in the pack, right? And with my friends and with my family, it just drains the fuck out of me. So like, I just need to take some time, but that doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means I need to be intentional. I'm very picky about who I like. And so if I like you, it's because you don't drain my energy and it's because
Like if I like you, then amazing. We're going to have like such a great time together. And if I don't like you, I'm just not going to spend my time with you. So you won't even know that I don't like you because I'm just not going to be around anyone that I don't enjoy. It's not going to happen. I think the other thing too that I have learned is quality over quantity.
friendships and relationships in my life. Like when you were just saying that now, Candace, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, if I like you, if I love you, if we're in relationship and partnership together, whatever that looks like, like probably a good chance that I help you bury a body without asking too many questions. Like, right? Like it goes deep. It goes deep unless the FBI is listening. And then, no, that's not true. you know, never. So it's like, if we like you, we love you, but we don't, we don't necessarily do like, guess. Then that's, you know. Just what it is. Okay. Anyways.
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We do like people, we're just selective about who we let in. Okay, this next misconception, I think you should say this one too, because, ugh, it's a big one. Okay, the next one is introverts can't be leaders. Because if you go back to being shy or maybe quiet or socially awkward, those are not necessarily words that you connect with leadership. The reality of it is though
Leaders just have to be visionaries and leaders have to inspire and introverts are absolutely capable of being great visionaries and inspiring lots of people. And if you don't believe me, go check out Chris Doe's Instagram. He has millions of followers and inspires millions of people around the world on a daily basis. And he is the biggest introvert probably that we've ever had on.
Not nice, clever. What does he call himself? A loud introvert. A loud introvert, yeah. Which is so great because I feel like I'd be like a spicy introvert, know, like with all the hot takes. Yeah. And you'd be like a detective introvert, like abrasive, right? Like Dom was saying how you're not her personality, y 'all. It's just her approach. We talked about this in a previous episode, but Dom called me abrasive one time. Like that was his descriptive word for me. And I was like, ooh, abrasive. And he said,
Yeah, but like a brace of like a loofah, you know, like you have to like get the dead stuff off. So like, it's a good thing. Your RBF just scares it right off people. It's just that you can't even hang around. Introverts absolutely can be leaders. Absolutely. They can. Another misconception that we don't like to talk. Candice, what episode are we recording right now? Well, I think that that one was really highlighted for me when we went to our first
podcast conference. yeah. Introverts love to talk because it was the most awkward conference that I've ever been to because people are so shy or maybe not shy. People were so in their own heads. World. Yeah. And I realized that, my gosh, Kat, light bulb moment for me. Podcasters are introverts.
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because we like to talk, but we want to do it in a safe space. So we're in our studios right now that we got to design that we feel comfortable in that we know what to expect when we walk in the room. I know who I'm talking to before I have the conversation. I can mentally prepare myself. I can do research. I can feel good about that conversation. So when I learned that podcasters, a lot of them are introverts. It made
feel like I'm in the right space. Yeah. Like I, it's been a huge, another huge like light bulb moment, not just when it comes to, let's say content where we'll film a reel or a TikTok or YouTube short and put it out there and hundreds and thousands of people will see it. Right. And that's like, didn't realize that was like the equivalent of me having like thousands of conversations without needing to have thousands of conversations. So can still have great impact, but maintain my energy.
Same thing with podcasting. I'm just like hopping on here with one of my best friends and we just like talking smack about branding, marketing, money and manifesting. All our favorite things. All the favorite things. And we can swear and we can be ourselves. And then it gets bottled up and recorded and shared with the clever crew. I love talking y 'all. Like Will probably wishes I didn't love talking as much as I love talking because he's also an introvert. We just want to choose our topics. I think that's really...
part of it for introverts. Like we want to know what the topic is going to be about and we want to feel equipped or prepared to have that conversation. I think that just makes us thoughtful. Yes, thoughtful, not picky, thoughtful, discerning. We just have standards, y 'all. That's it. That's it. And we encourage you to have them too. Okay. Last misconception that we want to talk about on this mini. this was a big one.
Big, big one. Thinking that even other introverts thinking this, extroverts thinking this, thinking that if you're an introvert that you need to change how you are in order to succeed, in order to be seen as successful, in order to be looked up to as a leader. Woop, there goes my headphone. Candice, I know you've got strong thoughts. I think that the most powerful thing that you can do when it comes to building your brand
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is doubling down on who you are. Even if you're an asshole, like it doesn't matter. No, I'm serious. It's true. I'm serious because yeah, because yeah, I mean, I won't name names, but y 'all know there are some brands that you watch out there and that is their brand. They're an asshole. They're going to say the thing you're not supposed to say. And they make a shit ton of money and they connect with the exact right people for them.
because they could be exactly who they are. And so I think just doubling down on exactly who you are is the absolute magic thing that you're looking for. can all guys look, okay, you it wouldn't be a not as clever episode without a quick dating analogy. It's like dating, you can only pretend to be someone else for so long, until one day you go on that date or you wake up the next person, you're like, who the fuck are you? And it's like, I'm an introvert, baby. Not an extrovert. I was trying did not work.
So thanks for listening to today's episode of Not Nice Clever, and don't forget to leave us a 5 star review and share it with a friend!
