EP226: Don't Get Sunk Like the Titanic

Even the greatest ship can be sunk by a small breach. That’s why, in this episode, we’ll discuss one of the top virtues of leadership: integrity. Listen until the end to learn different ways to protect your integrity and become a leader that others will want to follow.

Key Takeaways To Listen For

• What is integrity and why do leaders need it?
• Importance of owning up to your mistakes and communicating openly about issues at work
• Ways to uphold your integrity as a leader

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Dr. Nate Salah
Hello, my friend, and welcome to this episode of A Call to Leadership. I'm Dr. Nate Salah, your host, I'm so glad you're joining me today. This is an interesting episode one of my favorites to discuss qualities principles, what we hold dear, that our values of our leadership journey as a leader, a fellow leader, like you, people are watching people are trying to understand discern whether or not they are going to follow us walk with us if we are in fact worthy to lead, you've done this, do this every day, whether it's in your business, whether it's in politics, family, wherever it is, we're constantly assessing the worthiness of leadership. Have you developed the skills to effectively lead have I? That's all that this program this show, this podcast is about. It's about leadership that is worthy and effective. 

[00:01:01]
We talk a lot about servant leadership, we talk a lot about different models of leadership, do we always get it right now? But when we do get it, right, wow, that's fire, that is influence at its most amazing, most able, most resilient. And today is a day to talk a little bit about an attribute of leadership that I've talked about before on the show. And it comes up from time to time and it's worth revisiting maybe in a different way. You know, when you think about leaders who you are interested, who you believe you want to follow and emulate? What are some of their qualities? What are some of their virtues? You know, think about that, you know, maybe it's resilience, maybe it's self awareness or empathy, humility. All of these are worthy virtues. 

[00:01:53]
For me, the one that stands at the very top, if you know me, you'll not be surprised. Its integrity. You know, we throw that word around a lot. And we think, how does it manifest itself? What is integrity? And why is it essential, I believe, to trusting someone that's worthy to lead Well, we're gonna break that down. And to start with start with just a little bit of a story on integrity. Often we think of integrity as a way and it is, in fact, a way and one illustration I absolutely love is that of the Titanic, if you've been on this planet long enough, you know, you've heard about the Titanic, the RMS Titanic. It was at the time, the largest and most luxurious ship of its day it was an engineering marvel, its construction was advanced with safety features, it was supposedly unsinkable, and so it developed this reputation for invincibility and it had this double bottom hole, all these watertight compartments and to keep it afloat, even if damaged. It was in some ways considered hottie unsinkable boy, just imagine if you thought your business or your marriage or your family or your health was unsinkable. 

[00:03:25]
It would take a lot of bravado would take a lot of oh, how shall we say? It would take a lot of arrogance to make that claim almost as if test me world well, sometimes you do ask for tests, but sometimes my friend, we don't want those says I don't always want those to I don't want tests in such a way that may compromise the integrity of my leader ship. In fact, on April 14 1912, that's exactly what happened with the Titanic. It struck an iceberg in the North Atlantic, and the collision caused punctures and rips in the ship's hole and it breached and even though it had this advanced design, the damage was just too extensive. The integrity of the hall had been compromised beyond the ship's ability to remain afloat. And this is a metaphor. The hall serves as a representation, the integrity of an organization, a person, a system of family, and think of a well maintained or robust hole. The integrity, keeps it afloat, keeps it navigating through life's challenges. 

[00:04:42]
Nonetheless, there's an iceberg every turn, and it symbolizes unforeseen challenges, ethical dilemmas. The testing of the integrity of the organization of the individual and just as the Titanic's crew underestimated the ice are sometimes we underestimate the significance of challenges in our own lives and their impact. And so in some ways this breach of the whole of the Titanic, the parallel is a breach of integrity when our integrity is compromised, whether they be ethical failures, other problems, flooding, they can lead to disastrous consequences, our leadership can sink to the icy depths, in this case, the Titanic tragically sunk. Maybe it's different for an organization, loss of trust, loss of reputation, sometimes a complete failure sometimes, as an individual or a family, that also is the case. 

[00:05:42]
And sometimes when integrity is compromised, the damage can be swift, sometimes it's irrepairable. Trust erodes stakeholders, family members lose confidence, the foundation that once supported, our success starts to crumble. So what do we do? You know, what do we do in these situations? Well, I can tell you firsthand, I have not always been a person of integrity, I'd love to say that I have, but I have not always been whole, I have not always been undivided. And it has hurt relationships, it has hurt my business in the past, until I learned to stand on that stand on the commitment to honor what I say. Does that mean that sometimes mistakes happen, that sometimes you can't always control every aspect of your business experience 100%. In fact, just recently, we had committed to having some financials to a client by a certain deadline. And guess what we had our staff member who was responsible for it, had an injury and had other challenges, and was not able to complete the task on time. 

[00:06:55]
Now is that a breach of integrity, you can make an argument for that I can say at the time, we thought we'd be able to accomplish that. And we couldn't, of course, we make that sometimes. Disclaimer, hey, listen, as long as there isn't a disastrous event, as long as there isn't an iceberg. We won't breach this integrity. Sometimes things happen that are beyond our control. All we can do is make it right, how do we make it right? First, we own up to it. And then we work on fixing and solving the problem. If we can't do that, we're not going to make it as leaders, that's going to happen. But integrity isn't as much not following through when you have an issue. It is not following through at all, guess what you do? You say? Look, you know, it's gonna take a little long, just because we ran into some unforeseen issues along the way. We're gonna get it done. Does that mean that we keep a client that does that mean that we have a complete satisfaction? 

[00:07:55]
Maybe not? Does that mean that we learn set mean that we try harder next, I love Avis is old model. We're number two, we try harder. Sometimes you're in the number one spot and you move into number two. Guess what? It's time to try harder. And that's okay. Maybe there was a goof up with your spouse. And maybe you were supposed to pick up the kids but you thought your spouse was or you forgot? Guess what? Oops. I'm not number one anymore. I'm in the doghouse. I need to up my game and make it right. And sometimes integrity is simply doing what's right, no matter what, no matter the consequences. And we'll be tested on that. Sometimes we won't always pass the test. 

[00:08:43]
That just means that the next time test comes around, I don't know what the questions are, I can do it happen to me very recently, as a person of integrity, I want to have the integrity to love the unlovable, to pray for those who persecute me to do good to those who harm me that is a matter of a virtue and a value of integrity to me, and I don't always get it right. In fact, just last week, I was walking into a UPS Store. And I had my hands full of packages barely could hold them. And someone was walking by me as I'm fumbling trying to get in the door. So I don't drop all my packages. And it's saying Excuse me, excuse me.

[00:09:28]
And said, Do you know what time it is? And I'm just trying to hold my packages and like, No, I don't know what time it is. And do you know this person said, Well, you've got to watch on. And I walked in that UPS store of course I couldn't see my watch because I got these packages in my hands if I could maybe if I dropped him on the ground. I could look at my watch and I won't be honest friend. It was testing the integrity of my witness. It was testing the integrity of Have my care for those, especially those who perhaps misunderstand. And the right thing to do would have been to go back out. 

[00:10:08]
I saw her by the way, and I saw this person outside when I was leaving, you may disagree with this, but based on my own integrity of care, and the thing I wish I would have done was go right, sit next to that person or stand there and say, Hey, here's the time, sorry, I couldn't give it to you earlier, my hands were full. Maybe you didn't see it, maybe you didn't. But I want to express an act of kindness and generosity to you. And you might say, Nate, that's just going too far. Don't have to do that. Of course, you don't have to do that. But that's what I would like to do. I would like to show someone generosity through the integrity of My Spirit, the integrity, of purity of my witness, and my care for the human condition, regardless of how it is impacting me. But friend, I gotta be honest, I didn't do that. 

[00:10:57]
You say, Nate what did you do was pretty rough that day? Well, maybe not by many standards. But I walked out. And I saw that individual. And I looked over. And I just simply said, Ma'am, I couldn't tell you what time was because my hands were full. And I just kind of gave her a look, just for a moment. I walked to my car. And I drove off. I don't know what snarky comments she made. But to me, that was a fail. For me. That was a missed opportunity to show kindness and grace in my own integrity of Bing, and I missed it. And I went home, and I told my family about missing it. And that gives me an opportunity for next time. Step up, Nate, you can do this. You say, Nate, you're just a simp. You should have told that lady off. You should have told her. Hey, look, you know what, you got a lot of nerve lady, looking at me, you should have held the door open for me, instead of being snarky and rude and telling me how I needed to let drop my packages pretty much so that I can tell you what time it was. How would the nerve know? 

[00:12:02]
That's not what I should have done. Because that's not Nate Salah. You got to know who you are. You have to know who you are. And I'm not saying you'd be me. I'll be me. There's only one of you. Everyone else has taken Be yourself. But I'll be me the kind of legacy I want to leave and that's where we need to rest our hats on the kind of legacy we want to leave. How do we want to be remembered? I don't want to be remembered as a jerk. I used to be a jerk. I was hot-headed. condescending. belittling, demeaning. Always looking for a fight. You say they couldn't believe it? Yes. One time I was in a bar with some buddies. We were drinking playing pool. Some guy was going off saying some smart aleck stuff cracked up in that pool cue. And side is shoulder we bought into a big bar fight was big brawl. 

[00:12:53]
Police got called one of those kind of like made for TV stuff. We all got kicked out of the bar. Embarrassing. My girlfriend was a bartender there I was. It was embarrassing, because I allowed other people's behavior to control me. And this is so important. You know, I let people push my buttons all the way from high school. And before that I had a buddy in high school pushed my buttons. You're on the swim team together. And he constantly said stuff because he wanted to rile me up and get me ready to fight and I'd be so riled up and ready to fight. I didn't care outside get expelled. I don't care. You know, he'd say, I mean, I'm just playing with you. I got into fights with big guys, I got into a fight with anybody who I thought was disrespecting me. And I was little like Marty McFly, right? 

[00:13:39]
If I felt disrespected, I would do something that I thought was respectably standing up for myself. But in reality, a lot of it was just hotheadedness. And it was allowing others to control my behavior and is a point of integrity. For me. I wanted to stand whole. Were no matter what anyone said, my pathway, my whole the whole of my leadership, no matter what that iceberg was, it would remain whole sometimes friend, I had to just avoid the iceberg. I had to stay out of places that would test the integrity of my hole in such a way that would breach it. Are you in places where the integrity of your hole can not with stand the force of that iceberg? If you are sometimes it's better to be in a different environment. 

[00:14:31]
I've learned to do that now and sometimes every so often. I miss it. But most of the time, I'm thankful and happy to report in so doing we realize that we can be trustworthy at the end of the day. Are you worthy to lead Are you worthy for someone to trust that you will stand firm that you will be proactively Be vigilant just as that Titanic's crew should have been more vigilant. We, as leaders of individuals and organizations, we need to safeguard that integrity, we need to anticipate and prepare for those challenges. Honestly, we need to be transparent. Don't be overconfident, overconfidence can lead to complacency. We must have a commitment to vulnerability to transparency, do self-assessments be honest, it can prevent small issues from becoming catastrophic breaches, and then be responsible. You know, when integrity is breached, let's take responsibility. 

[00:15:43]
Let's take corrective action. It's crucial denial delay, it can worsen the damage because this story, the Titanic is a metaphor for the importance of integrity, just as the integrity of the ship's Hall was vital to its survival. So to is our personal and organizational integrity, it's vital for our families, it's vital for our businesses, it's vital for our communities. And it's crucial for enduring success for resilience. We don't want those consequences, we need to guard our integrity with vigilance, the kind of vigilance it deserves. Even a small breach can sink, the greatest ship, stay honest, stay transparent, stay accountable, your future depends on it, protect that integrity, I vowed to protect it, and to walk in such a way where we illuminate a path that is stronger, more effective, and that others will want to bind alongside of us. 

[00:16:49]
Think about those in your own life. who count on you to be a person who is undivided whole, we get that word integrity, shares language with integer it is whole, undivided? Are you whole? And undivided? Is your Yes, yes. And your No, no. If someone counts on you, and you make a commitment, Are you the kind of person who will finish and finish? Well, no matter what happens, no matter what roadblocks are on the way you may be working on a project, and it goes horribly wrong, because of perhaps what someone else did, maybe someone you hired and a contractor, and you're just ripping your hair out, like, Oh, my goodness, what's happening here, I'm losing so much money, and I'm losing my reputation. Listen, Friend, here's where integrity comes in commitment, I'm gonna commit to making it right. You can't control everything that happened. I'm gonna explain what happened, why it happened? And what I'm going to do to make it right. 

[00:17:50]
Can you do that, if you can do that consistently, and you continue to make strides to create a better and better experience for all your stakeholders, friend, you will be trustworthy, you will be the kind of person who will be worthy, worthy to lead and worthy to be followed. Well, my friend, thank you for joining me on this episode of A Call to Leadership. If you've been listening, you've probably heard me talk about our accounting and advisory business. And this show was actually born out of that business, those relationships, I found that entrepreneurs and professionals were missing aspects of their leadership that fed into their bottom line and help their businesses be successful. 

[00:18:32]
So I'm so thankful that I've had all those years in that area to feed into this. And the truth is that so many people still need Accounting and Advisory help and they don't know where to go. If you're in that place where you feel oh, my goodness, my tax person or my accountant, I can't find them. Or maybe the service wasn't up to my expectations did not disappear. I'll leave how you can find us in the show notes. And one of my team members can do some discovery and help you along your journey. You're not alone, my friend. You always have help. I'm Dr. Nate Salah. Can't wait to see you on the next show of A Call to Leadership.