Chasing Dreams and Raising Kids with Heath Kennedy

Dom L'Amour speaks with good friend Heath Kennedy AKA @heathbuh about Family, acting, goals and so much more.

Ever wondered how a chance encounter can blossom into a lifetime of laughter and love? Heath Kennedy, a close friend whose life story could fuel a dozen rom-coms, joins me, Dom L'Amour, for an episode that dances between the joyous mayhem of fatherhood and the electric thrill of chasing comedy dreams. With the welcome chaos of his fourth child, Heath and I delve into the art of balancing growing family dynamics, the unbreakable bonds of friendship, and the power of a good chuckle.

As we stroll through memory lane, we hit the rewind button to the college days where music reigned supreme and love was waiting in the wings at The Tiki Hut. Heath shares the cinematic tale of meeting his wife April, peppered with moments straight out of a screenplay, as we dissect the fortitude required in both personal and professional arenas. Parenting takes center stage too, with heartfelt contemplation on the delicate dance of nurturing and knowing when to step back, all underscored by the symphony of childhood uniqueness.

The curtain rises on a raw reflection of our shared college theater escapades and the unscripted lessons learned under the spotlight. From grappling with complex roles to setting the stage ablaze with record-breaking cabaret performances, we unpack the odyssey of creative passion and the eternal quest to leave audiences in stitches. Join us for this candid conversation filled with warmth, wit, and wisdom—a tribute to the unpredictable script of life and the enduring pursuit of artistic excellence.

Opening quote: Earl Nightingale

Opening and Closing Theme song: Produced by Dom L'Amour

Transition Music from Mad Chops Vol. 1 and Mad Chops Vol. 2 by Mad Keys

and 

from Piano Soul Vol.1(Loop Pack) by The Modern Producers Team

Featured song: "And I Love her" Cover preformed by Dom L'Amour and Heath Kennedy

Cover art by Studio Mania: Custom Art @studiomania99

Please subscribe to the podcast, and give us a good rating. 5 stars please and thank you. Follow me on @doml_amour on Instagram. Or at 

domlamour.com

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Abby Vatterot yeah, she was kind of like you should get in touch with my agent and you should go for it because you were always really funny. Mark Richard, yeah, he introduced me to his girlfriend and he introduced me as one of the funniest guys he's ever met and ever known. And I was like man, like just hearing people talk about kind of like you just did kind of making me blush over here hearing what people think about my, my, like you just did kind of making me blush over here hearing what people think about my, my skills and my talent. And I I talked to april.

Speaker 1: 0:31

I was like man, maybe I should go for it and she's kind of like, well, duh, yeah, like why, haven't you been yeah but I think it was just kind of a mental block, like I've got other things that I have to take care of first and yeah, I've uh, I've gotten back into it. I, I signed with the same agency that abby's at after putting her name on there, like hey, I know her yeah, I know her. She's good, so maybe I'm a little good because I know her.

Speaker 3: 1:07

Ladies and gentlemen, and anyone else who is here, my name is Don Lamour and you are listening to the Black man Talking Emotions podcast. On today's episode, I speak with the Godfather no, I speak with the father of my God babies and my great friend Heath Kennedy about family acting, goals and so much more. Never give up on your dreams just because of the time it will take to achieve it. The time will pass anyway. I am so pumped to have you on the pod. You were one of the people I wanted on early last season and it just never happened. So the idea that we got to do it now is so dope no-transcript.

Speaker 3: 2:27

Of course you just had baby Nova. So before we even jump into, the pod.

Speaker 1: 2:30

How is being a father for the fourth time? How is that going right now? Uh, first off, though I didn't have her, I didn't really do much. April that is true indeed uh, nine months prior, but oh yeah yeah, uh, it's, it's. It's interesting because our youngest before Nova is six, lola, so there was about a six year gap there and where we didn't have any baby. So it's like, oh, but it's kind of like a bicycle, you just hop right in. I remember everything.

Speaker 1: 3:02

I probably would have been totally lost if it was a boy.

Speaker 3: 3:06

but oh yeah.

Speaker 1: 3:07

Yeah, since it was a girl, it's kind of like oh I know, I know all this.

Speaker 3: 3:11

That's dope. That's dope. And do you feel like the girls like, especially? I know Zoe is being Zoe as usual, but I heard she was actually afraid to hold the baby. Actually, Right.

Speaker 1: 3:21

Pretty small.

Speaker 3: 3:22

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 3:23

Afraid to hold her kind of standoffish about touching her.

Speaker 3: 3:33

But Lola and Eliza, that's all they want to do. That's good. I'm sure that Zoe will come around because she's just too sweet to be standoffish for too long. But you get to experience the one thing I never thought I would experience. I never thought I would see Bic's sister Lola. I always thought she was going to be the baby, you know.

Speaker 3: 3:46

So I'm curious to see how that goes. I've loved the pictures, and it looks like she's so happy. It's so bizarre to me, though, because that is the one thing I like. I always thought Lola was going to be the baby, you know.

Speaker 1: 4:00

And then and then it came around. She said something to April bring me the baby. I was like I think that's a sign that baby happy and doing well.

Speaker 3: 4:25

It's so cool to continue to see the family grow and I know that it's a headache in some ways. I know that it's a lot of work, of course, but I'm proud and happy for you and excited. And one thing like I said, this show is themed around really just one theme when it comes to you and I've built it into three parts because it's very, very easy conversation hearts. Because it's very, very easy conversation. The one thing about you you're a confident guy, great looking gentleman and I feel like a lot of the things about you. You know, I got to live with you in college and I got to grow up with you and I have always viewed you like family.

Speaker 3: 4:57

The one thing about you that I always noticed was you pretty much knew what you wanted. In certain ways you would tell us I want this or I'm going to go for this, and that's kind of the theme today. I'm going to start in one place and then I'm just going to kind of work through and kind of pick your brain on how you thought about this and that in where you were and how it happened, because really you would see things you want and you usually would just go for them and, out of a blink of an eye, that was it we're going gonna start with, of course, april. I think I tell y'all love story more than I tell me, and adrian's love story to people, because I was there for all of it and I was so thrilled to be a part of it and I remember exactly where you were before the two of you met.

Speaker 3: 5:40

There was a lot of emotions. Yeah, you went through a hard breakup and we, of course, were in college, so there was a lot of emotions. Yeah, you went through a hard breakup and we, of course, were in college, so there was a lot of drinking and partying and late nights. We were working at a bar. You were a manager at that point, right? Yeah, so you were already manager at that point, so you was the last person at the bar and a very bad bartender, yeah you weren't horrible.

Speaker 3: 6:05

You people loved you.

Speaker 1: 6:06

You came in, you popped the bottles open like everybody else well, it's because I made the drink strong people come in and ask for something and say, okay, what's in it, and I kind of make up my own thing you see someone to be like hey, I want a fuzzy navel.

Speaker 3: 6:21

You're like cool, what's that?

Speaker 1: 6:25

and I make up my own thing. As long as you make it strong, they like it.

Speaker 3: 6:29

That's all that matters. Oh, that's so dope. I think about the nights we had poker night one, and I remember you knocked out a 12 pack of Miller and you were just upset and then I remember you were talking to different women here and there. Do you even think about that stuff anymore? Like your life is so different, you're past that. You have so many great things going on for you. Like, do you ever find yourself being like, wow, man, that was rough, that was a rough time for me. I don't really.

Speaker 1: 6:56

That's good, I would assume you wouldn't yeah. Some things I go back to. You know things that maybe I've done, that I might regret, that kind of keep you up at night kind of thinking. Like you know, man, I wish I would have handled that differently, but not really. I try not to dwell on the past. I'm kind of a forward looking guy.

Speaker 3: 7:14

Which I like literally assumed before I asked the question. But it's just something I'm curious about because while I was writing this up I was just like man. I remember that very vividly. I remember that night Jeff beat you up with the mini bat. I remember like having conversations over the table and it's just kind of crazy how much of that I remember and I don't I don't recall that that often, so it was kind of bizarre Like wow, I remember all of that. Really, that was a really crazy part of our lives.

Speaker 1: 7:44

This might be a shock. I don't really remember a lot of the conversations from that night. Because, I think Adam drank one of the beers, but I think I drank the other. That was sad. Yeah, I don't know if women had anything to do with it at the time, but I had found out that my dad was in the hospital and they didn't really tell me why.

Speaker 1: 8:04

I didn't know what was going on, so I was like I'm far away from home and my dad's in the hospital. I don't know why I've already had something to drink, so it's not like I can go up there anyways.

Speaker 3: 8:14

That was the reason why you were upset. That was just on top of the other stuff you were going through, because the breakup had just happened, and then you were trying to talk to other people. You're trying to get out there. You were trying to be the bachelor, you know, but you never enjoyed being the bachelor.

Speaker 1: 8:30

That was what you always told me. I don't even like this shit. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, I never really liked playing the field. I was always, always looking to be in a relationship.

Speaker 3: 8:36

The night that we actually met, april is so special to me Cause I just remember I mean, I remember the crew even Chester was with us that night. It was such a bizarre crew that was there that night and we were going out in the scene and you didn't even want to come out with us. Do you remember that? Yeah, he was like I don't want to come out. I was like no, you got to come out, let's go.

Speaker 1: 8:55

I'm pretty sure you drove my car and I rode in the back and I think the only way you guys got me to go there is you bought me a six pack of Coors and I was like I'll go and all my music stuff was already in the trunk. I was like we can take my car.

Speaker 1: 9:10

You were always trying to get me to go play with Bob whenever he was there, and that night I was like I'll go. But you got to get me a six pack and I'm right at the back and I'm going to drink it while we go.

Speaker 3: 9:19

Bob Kemp was just one of those things for me that I always loved. I still reminisce about how often I actually was on stage in college, and it had nothing to do with the fact that I was a theater major. It was because, at work, bob Kemp was there every Tuesday. So I got to get on stage and I got to sing and I got to perform, even though he wasn't the best, even though he would always forget who I was, even though I performed with him every Tuesday, and on top of the fact that I would sing with every Tuesday, he would always throw jabs. I remember he would look me and be like you remember who who show this is Dom, like he was so bizarre.

Speaker 1: 9:58

That's one of the main things that April brings up about. The night we went to the Tiki Hut to play with him. Yeah, she was like you and dom were playing and singing together and everybody was loving it. Bob came up and was like, remember, who showed his guys? They liked us more than they liked him. Oh my god he was so stupid.

Speaker 3: 10:17

But once again, no matter what, even though we were doing what we were doing, he, he was giving us a platform. So it was pretty cool to do that. And I still remember we're at the end of the bar, chester is like so uncomfortable and he's like I don't really want to be here. Sellers is ordering us drinks and we're all just enjoying the night with each other and you were starting to kind of enjoy it a little bit. The whole night you were kind of like I don't really want to be here and eventually you got to a point where you was kind of getting it. And then we saw April and it was like go, let's do this, let's do it, we try to have a good time. And it just flipped. How do you remember the first time you saw April at the end of the bar, like is it like a movie for you? Because it's like a movie for me.

Speaker 1: 11:07

It was kind of like a movie. Yeah, I saw Celis at the end of the bar talking to a couple pretty ladies one very pretty in particular, and I was like you know what?

Speaker 1: 11:19

I've got a few drinks in me. I'm going to go talk to these ladies with Celis. Yeah, I've got a few drinks and me I'm going to go talk to these ladies with Celis, yeah, and I walked up. Celis was standing next to April's friend, tracy at the time. So I just walked around to the other side, to where April was, and I was like, hey, what's up? Hey, I'm Heath Probably probably laid a cool line. I know Celis, you guys know Celis, he's my friend. What a guy.

Speaker 3: 11:49

What a guy. What a guy, ah Sellers, what a guy. God rest his soul. How did that conversation go with you two? I never really got the wording because, like I said, everything kind of after that it was game over.

Speaker 1: 11:55

Y'all were good to go. Well, like you said, I just had a bad breakup. I had some liquid courage and saw a very beautiful woman and decided to start talking to her and I remember she had like the 50s style pinup rolls in her hair. I don't know what they call them, but that was the second thing I noticed. The first thing I noticed was her eyes and I was like she has gorgeous eyes.

Speaker 3: 12:18

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 12:21

And I was kind of like oh hey, I'm Heath, and I was like, can I buy you a drink? She's like, yeah, and I bought her a shot of Jameson, I believe, and then she bought me one. Turns out she wasn't even old enough to drink at the time.

Speaker 3: 12:36

No way but she worked there so. I didn't know that.

Speaker 1: 12:40

Yeah, so she was able to sneak it. The first time I actually asked her out on a date we were in Buckner's. It all kind of does play out like a movie, because that night I met her, I got her number. I remember flirting with her. Her last name was Matlock and I just kept calling her Matlock, like hey, matlock, just kind of I mean, you've seen Drunk Heath? Yeah, hey, hey, hey. And we exchanged numbers and then I remember we left. I felt really really good, kind of like that girl's way out of my league.

Speaker 3: 13:12

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 13:12

I got her number. She was interested enough to give me her number and I just remember thinking like it's going to be OK because I'm getting back out there Fast forward. A couple of weeks later I was a little intimidated. So back out there, fast forward. A couple of weeks later I was a little intimidated. So she tried to text me actually and I text her back a little bit. I was still living with my ex at the time. Yeah, somewhere in me was like maybe it'll work, I don't know. That didn't end up happening and I I didn't text her back that much. And then, like I said, it's kind of like a movie. On her 21st birthday they partying ragsdales and I was working up at buckner bar and she wanted a honey wheat and down in the ragsdales bar the honey wheat was warm yep so they said if you want a cold honey wheat you're gonna have to go up to buckner bar.

Speaker 1: 13:58

And then she had gotten a haircut. So I don't think she thought I was gonna recognize her. But you were saying it's kind of cinematic. She was walking up those sidesteps and I saw her and I was like, oh my god, that's, that's Matt, that's her yeah, that's Matt and then I was like, oh, inside I was like I gotta play this smooth.

Speaker 1: 14:18

And she came up. She was like hi. And I was like oh, hey, and I was like I remember you, matt Locke. And then she smiled real big and then she would keep coming back up for the honeyweets. And then I was like I really do think she likes me. And I remember her standing at the end of the bar where the waiters and waitresses would drop off the drink.

Speaker 3: 14:37

And.

Speaker 1: 14:38

I was making somebody else's drink and I just kind of glanced over at her, winked and she smiled real big and kind of did the whole head down thing and then like oh shucks, and then I went over and I asked her out and I was like I'll take you anywhere you want to go and she said, how about Saffron? I was like OK.

Speaker 3: 14:55

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 15:00

And then we set up a date and it was three days later, I believe. She went back to party with her friends and I was talking to Celis and I was like she wants to go to Saffron. He's like, ooh, that's a good place.

Speaker 3: 15:07

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 15:08

And he's like you like sushi. I was like I've never had it. I was like, celis, what do I get? I don't know what to order. So he, uh, he told me some things that I should order and then I thought I completely blew it on our first date. Yeah, I was like, ok, we'll go to dinner. And we had dinner. We had a great dinner. We got to know each other.

Speaker 1: 15:33

I guess she wasn't used to it, but whenever the check came, I grabbed it. I guess she thought that we were going to go. I was like no, I was like I got it. I took you out. After that she's like what do you want to do now? And I was like, uh, I was like, oh crap. I was like I hadn't been on a first date in a long time. I only only planned dinner, I don't know what to do. So we went and we drove by the movie theater and nothing good was playing, drove back to saffron and she got in her car and, just kind of like a hug, I gave her a hug and I was like, oh, I had a really good time and I hope to hear from you again. I think she said the same thing. I can't remember exactly, it was kind of in my head.

Speaker 1: 16:13

I was in my head Like yeah, of course you, you blew it, dude. I went back to Buckner's after which, you know, thinking about it, we could have gone to bucksters and hung out, but I was dumb, I was, my mind was going a mile a minute. Yeah went back there and I was, I remember, sitting at the end of the bar talking to sell us and he was talking to him about how it went and I was like, man, I think I blew it. I blew it. I was like, but at least I'm getting back out there and then I get a text from her. That's like, I had a really good time tonight. You, you want to go out again? And I was like, yeah, I was like she texted me, she had a good time.

Speaker 3: 16:56

Having Heath on is one of those special episodes. I do that every week, I know, I know, but I do love all of my people and Heath stood up with me when I got married. He was one of those people who kind of brought me back to earth in college. I felt like we were around so many people, so many interesting characters, and Heath always reminded me of just, you know, normalcy I guess that's the best way to describe it.

Speaker 3: 17:24

People were so dramatic over the top. There was always some type of drama. There was always something crazy going on. There was always something that I just couldn't understand why. I couldn't understand why people were acting a certain way.

Speaker 3: 17:38

But whenever I was around Heath, heath reminded me of home. He reminded me of family. He reminded me of level-headed people who weren't overthinking. He just was hanging, he was just there for a good time. He was laughs, it was drinks. Like I said, there was girl talk, there was acting talk. There was a lot of drama, of course, because we were dramatic people too. We were drama majors, but we got each other, we understood each other and I always looked at him like family.

Speaker 3: 18:10

I never wanted to feel like I was surrounded by strangers and I feel like that happens to me a lot. Heath was one of those people who truly wanted to know me. He always had great advice, he was always welcoming and when he started having kids he asked me to be his godfather. His kids and his babies are everything to me. I love him so much. I love April so much. I love Zoe, eliza, lola and Nova so much. I just hope you all can get a little glimpse into the great man that I know that is Heath. So thanks to Heath for being on the pod. Shout out to the whole Kennedy family. I feel like that whole time period seems so long ago but, like you say, as you talk about it I still remember it so vividly. It makes me smile. It was very genuine. You both really clicked. You were pumped. I remember every time you would talk about her you were so pumped about April back then she's a roller derby girl.

Speaker 1: 19:21

She's incredibly beautiful, like just cool.

Speaker 3: 19:25

I'll never forget that. And how long from there was it till you got married.

Speaker 1: 19:31

Let's see. So I asked her out on her birthday, which is September 5th. I ended up moving back home somewhere between then and October because I remember I would go home for like two or three days. My grandma had passed and I was helping clean her house, staying there whenever I would come back to Crystal City, festus, and I would clean this house out for a couple of days and then come Thursday I'd be like, well, I got to get back down to see April. Yeah, so I would hit you up. I'd hit up pretty much anybody down there. Can I ride a couch for a couple nights? And, yeah, I'd just come down and spend all the time I could with her A couple times. This is nothing bad about you, dom.

Speaker 3: 20:17

Of course.

Speaker 1: 20:18

April and I would hang out pretty late, not doing anything scandalous, just chilling, and it would be like, oh, I'm going to stay the night at Dom's tonight, and then I'd be done hanging out with her and I would text you like, hey man, can I come over? And then it's like you were either partying too hard or you were falling asleep. So there were a couple of nights where I would drive over to Buffalo Wild Wings parking lot and sleep in my car, no way, so that I'd just wake up the next morning and drive back to April's parents' house and hang out with her.

Speaker 3: 20:48

I want people who are listening to the podcast to know college was a different time for me. I was not a horrible person, okay? I don't want people to think that Damn, that's crazy man.

Speaker 1: 21:00

In all actuality, it's probably just you had gone out and had a good time and then went home and went to bed, and then I'm texting you while you're asleep like hey, let me in.

Speaker 2: 21:14

Oh shit.

Speaker 3: 21:15

All right. The reason why I asked it that way was because I wanted you, because, like I said, y'all clicked so quickly. Like I said, from when you asked her on that first date till you were married. How long was that time period?

Speaker 1: 21:26

I asked her out on our first date, september 5th. She moved in with me around November and then February we were married. Exactly.

Speaker 3: 21:39

It was like magic. It was like yo, we are ready, let's do this. And I remember the conversation you had with me because you told me later in the game, because you told me I was nervous to tell you because I thought you were going to be like no, and I still remember that like it was yesterday, because April was always so sweet to me. All the people in the game, even my girlfriend at the time, was kind of against it. I was the only one who's just like yo. She ain't done nothing wrong, he's happy. He's always talking about how happy he is.

Speaker 3: 22:08

What's wrong with that? Like I was so pumped for you and I felt like you know, of course I'm the honest friend to a lot of people. I didn't want you to be like nervous, to talk to me about stuff, because I was honest with you. And then my honesty, I was like yo, I'm not worried. I think y'all great, you know what I'm saying. That was the honest truth. But I understood because you know, up to that point there was a lot of hard talks, a lot of nights where we were going through what was going on with our significant others and our future and the things that we wanted, and there was some hard conversations before you met April, so I totally understood that, but it was so dope and you truly, like I said you, you saw her, you felt the energy, you got the confirmation and then you just jumped on it. That was all it took that confirmation, was it?

Speaker 1: 22:59

It's just one of those things where the heart knows what it wants. I was nervous to tell you I was because what I was hearing from everybody else oh, that's too fast, how do you know? It's too quick. You haven't even known that long and I was like I mean, here we are, what is it? 2024? February 25th will be 12 years of marriage.

Speaker 3: 23:17

Think about that. How many people told you it's too quick and they ain't together with the person they was with back then? Yeah, how much of the list goes on 12 years of marriage and four children.

Speaker 3: 23:58

I remember having a conversation with you. It was one of those like brotherly late night bunk bed conversations in our dorm room. I remember this like it was yesterday and we were talking about our future and I was like man, I want to travel, I want to go here, I want to go there. I'm trying to hit these bitches Like I was fucking around, you know, but I'll say all this stuff and you were like, you know, I just want to be a father. I'll never forget that night. I said all of the stupid stuff about traveling and all the people. I want to be with you. Just plainly, I want to be a father. That was your goal and you have four babies now. I guess I did.

Speaker 3: 24:39

Yeah, man, you were so straightforward. You wanted to be a father. Family was key. That was the number one thing you wanted to be. That was the first thing you said. That was the number one thing you wanted to be.

Speaker 1: 24:57

That was the first thing you said. How long did you know? That was like the thing for you. How long did you know? Hey, I want some babies and I want to be the poppet. I don't know. I just had good role models from my parents. I always saw myself as being a father and having children. God, thinking back to when I said that, I probably wasn't like. Even now I'm like, I don't know what I'm doing half the time, but they're all very, very smart and I'm very proud of all of them.

Speaker 3: 25:19

The Kennedy girls. Do you feel like they have that rep that you and your brother had when y'all were? Y'all were the Kennedy boys in town, everybody knew y'all and all that jazz.

Speaker 1: 25:26

Yeah, I think they're really popular in school yeah all the teachers love them and they've all, they've all got a lot of friends. Yeah, I feel like the teachers all want them in their classes. We're pretty lucky because, uh, zoe is our oldest, she's the first one that all the teachers get to see and she is just so polite, so well-mannered. And then you get to eliza and she's the opposite eliza's sweet eliza's.

Speaker 3: 25:52

Sweet though she, if you like, if you communicate with her right, she is very sweet yeah, I think it's just she gets.

Speaker 1: 26:00

She's so smart, she gets a little bored yeah and then she gets restless. She's a little hard-headed, but I love that about her because she's not taking any shit from anybody she's like her mama.

Speaker 3: 26:12

That's the thing. She's just like april.

Speaker 1: 26:14

Yeah, she very much is like april. Sometimes I wish to be a little bit more lenient with me and listen a little bit more, because I'm just trying to take care of her and uh, yeah, I tell them all the time. I'm like you know, sometime I'm gonna tell you not to do something. That's like don't run out in the street Cause there's a car coming, you're not going to listen to me and you might get hurt. I'm not telling you not to do things to be mean or to have you miss out on anything. It's because I don't want you to get hurt. But I guess maybe I need to let go a little bit and let them learn their own lessons sometimes.

Speaker 3: 26:48

Sometimes I feel like a helicopter parent but I just want what's best for them, Of course. I mean, that's what you should want. You're a great guy, but that's the thing I see out of them. I always say that Zoe has more of you in the goofiness that you have in you. Eliza, I'm sure, has that goofy. She is goofy, All of them are goofy. But I feel like Lola has made me laugh the most in so many moments when she was down here. She was just like a comedian. The girl is hilarious. But Zoe has more of you. I feel like Eliza has more of April all through and Lola.

Speaker 3: 27:22

Like I said, Lola's the one that I thought was always going to be the little princess. She was always the one who could command the room herself. If she wanted what she wanted, she would get it because she's so. She's determined. Yes, determined, Exactly. That's a good way to look at it. But as a father of these three, of course but now you got a fourth I feel like Nova is so new to the game. It's a little different, difficult to kind of gauge her personality and the things that she's going to do to influence everyone. Like you said, you're nervous about if you're doing right and you're nervous about everything. You just want the best for them. But, with that being said, how do you feel that you're doing in general? Like, what things do you think you're doing good with them?

Speaker 1: 28:06

Well, I think that they're all. They're all very, very smart. I don't know how much credit I can take for that.

Speaker 1: 28:12

I do help them with their homework, but so is April. So we're we're pretty active in their schoolwork, but I'm very proud that they're also smart and they're all getting straight A's. You know, it's a constant struggle because sometimes I feel like I'm too hard on them and, being on the on the route every day, I'm by myself and all I have to do all day is think yeah. So I'm constantly thinking about I shouldn't have said this or I should have handled that differently with the children, and I'm constantly thinking I'm a bad father and I just don't want to, don't want to mess them up, you know.

Speaker 3: 28:56

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 28:56

But when I'm in the moment, I feel like I get a little too strict and then I immediately think, man, they're just kids. Why am I? Why am I getting a little angry and shutting what they're doing down?

Speaker 3: 29:12

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 29:13

And it's it's a constant thing every day. I'm always thinking while I'm out on the route like man, I'm not doing a good job.

Speaker 3: 29:21

You're doing a good job, dude. I feel like when they came down here one that was still uh, I don't know how how much you know. Like I said, I've been begging y'all to come down here for so long I literally made my little walkway in the front yard with Zoe in mind, like I was like I'm going to do this and I'm going to put this little hopscotch here so that when the girls come here they can do this. Like literally that's what my head immediately went to, to my goddaughters coming to my house and knowing that they can come see Uncle Dom whenever they want to. And it's just, it's so dope to see them all together and kind of see all of y'all. And we had it in a weird way where April was so sick when she was here that it was really just me and Adrian get to kick it with the girls for a little bit until you got down. And it was just so fun, it's so cool and I, like I said, I don't think you're doing a bad job and I hope you don't really feel like you're doing bad, because it's really great to see where you've come and how they've come. And, like I said, you wanted to be a father and boom, you're dad. You'd be dad. You know what I'm saying? No-transcript.

Speaker 3: 30:57

When I was laying the mulch in the front yard before you got in town, me and Eliza was outside and I was just like Eliza, what do you want to do when you grow? What do you want to do this? And that she was like I want to be a scientist. And I was like, oh dope, that's Eliza. What do you want to do when you grow up? What do you want to do this and that? And she was like I want to be a scientist. And I was like, oh dope, that's dope. What do you want to be a scientist? What do you want to do? She was like I want to cure cancer.

Speaker 1: 31:18

And.

Speaker 3: 31:20

I'll never forget that moment. She'll be a 34-year-old woman who hates me. I, a 34 year old woman who hates me. I don't know what our relationship would be there, but like she's like well, hate me and I'll be like I just remember when you were a kid, you were so great. Now you suck Like I. Just I see so much light in those kids and they don't get that without you as a pops. Of course, april as well, but don't don without you is the pops.

Speaker 1: 31:55

Of course, april as well. But don't don't beat yourself up, man. You're doing fantastic well, you know. I think it's probably what everybody does. When you've got hours by yourself, you just start nitpicking everything that you think you've not done the best at and then second guess a hundred different different choices that you've made throughout the previous day and, deep down, I think I'm doing a good job, because they're very respectful.

Speaker 1: 32:10

I feel like at home is their safe space. That's what we get, april and I. They go crazy here because this is their safe space. They can do what they want and they can be who they are. They can just kind of let their guard down around us. Maybe that's why they get so nuts and crazy. All I hear whenever we're out is how, how good they are and how respectful they are to everybody and they are.

Speaker 3: 32:35

They're very polite they make me so happy. And last year sucked because it was like the first Halloween I didn't get to spend with them in a long time, but I got to see them here at the house and that made the year for me. I'm just so proud of y'all. I'm so happy for you because, more than anything, like I said, I will always remember that night and you saying I just want to be a pop. So whenever I see you with the babies and I see you with the kids on Facebook or Snap or whatever, it reminds me of us being kids in college and us actually talking about our dreams and out of all of those crazy dreams that we had, the one that was accomplished, like I said, because of that eagle eye approach that you have. You wanted to be a father man. Boom, you got some babies in love. That's all I could do.

Speaker 2: 33:30

And if you saw, my love, you'd love her too. I love her too tenderly. The kiss my lover brings, she brings to me as a murder. As a murder, a love that far could never die. As long as I have you near me. Bright are the stars that shine, dark is the sky. I know this love of mine Will never die.

Speaker 3: 34:48

This is from my last performance in college, actually One of the last. I had not performed there in over 10 years in Cape. But I had Heath join me on stage for this song because he actually introduced me to the Beatles. So big shout out to Heath for that. You can listen to my music on all streaming platforms. You can check me out for more information at domlamorecom, where you can get anything and everything. Dom L'Amour here we go.

Speaker 2: 35:24

I will never die as long as I have you near me. Bright are the stars that shine, light is the sky. I know this power's mine. We'll never die.

Speaker 3: 36:04

The last thing I want to speak about for sure is what we went to college for we're performers. We both enjoy comedy and improv and anything Acting, acting, acting. That was it. I always would tell you that you were one of my favorite actors in school.

Speaker 3: 36:21

You were, you were you. Always you would take a scene and no matter what the scene was, no matter what the short act, what act, whatever we were doing was, people will walk away being like, oh man, heath was so great. I remember at near the end of our college careers together, when you were about to graduate, you were the king of the second stage. I know you might not look at yourself as that way, but like everyone in the department would rave about your performance in the second stage, cause that's when you actually were given the opportunities to just do your thing. You got to be in To Kill a Mockingbird, which was like your top one for sure. I'm sure that that might be your favorite show you were in and that, but that was after you graduated, right.

Speaker 1: 37:11

Yeah, I had been cast when I was still there. And then I graduated in December, I think of 10, 2010. Oh geez 14 years ago 14 years ago, me jeff jeff and I yeah english, but yeah that that was a lot of fun getting to play a very hated person. You killed the dough I. I guess one of the things that made me really uncomfortable was whenever I had to spit on paul yeah and I remember ken coming up to me and being like, hey, you can't fake this.

Speaker 1: 37:52

We were in the rust, so the audience was right there and he's like, hey, you can't fake it, you don't have to spit in his face, but you have to spit on him.

Speaker 1: 38:00

And I was like, oh, yeah that was a struggle but I worked through it. Yeah, spit on him every night and then I have oh, I have one. I feel like a dick, but I feel like it's also one of my greatest moments of active listening, because one night Paul, who played Atticus God love him. I don't know if I could have memorized all those lines, but one night he got confused in the, in the courtroom scene where he's talking about somebody, did it with their right hand and it should have been left hand, because my character, mr yule, was left-handed yeah and and he said somebody designed it with his right hand.

Speaker 1: 38:46

And my character was supposed to stand up that point whenever he said left hand and be like oh you son of a bitch or whatever. And he said right hand. And I remember my heart was beating so fast and I was like I just, instead of standing up and doing my line, I just kind of sat back and I was like I started nodding my head like yeah, it was somebody with his right hand, it wasn't me he just exonerated me.

Speaker 1: 39:11

Yeah, but then I remember going up to Paul and I was like man, I'm sorry, I'm sorry I didn't stand up and do what I was supposed to, because Paul kind of stood there for a second and then he shook it off and kept going. But I imagine everybody else in the cast was like why didn't he stand up? But I imagine everybody else in the cast was like why?

Speaker 3: 39:30

didn't he stand up. But that's what we're taught. We're taught to actually listen, even though we know the lines, even though we do it. In that scenario, if you would have stood up, you'd have been like, oh I didn't, wasn't listening at all, you were just waiting to say your line.

Speaker 3: 39:48

That's the kind of thing that in the people could tell you were truly invested in what was going on and that's why I like to bring this up.

Speaker 3: 39:51

That's why I wanted to bring up the performance aspect of our careers, because that took a backseat for a while, with your babies and being married and moving back up to Crystal City and trying to get your life together, trying to get everything taken care of for Zoe and then Eliza and then Lola and now Nova, is like nonstop work, getting your shit together and then, boom, you got that spark again.

Speaker 3: 40:11

And it really warms my heart because of how, going back to before, to McKillop Mockabird, you and Cal T Mitchell are like the two that I think of when it comes to like second stage, because that was where y'all got to really work, that's where you got to do shows and y'all were usually the people cast first. I remember that because they could choose whoever they wanted. You and Cal were always cast because they were like I mean, we know we can get them there for sure here they didn't utilize y'all during the department and I can go on and on about Southeast Missouri State's theater department, because I wanted the best from it. I wanted to believe that we were in a position that was going to elevate us to the next level, and in ways we were, but in ways they just weren't there yet and I bet the kids that's at the school now are getting an extremely different education than we did, because it's a conservatory now and they've actually passed all the tests and they actually learned from their mistakes, which just so happened to be us.

Speaker 2: 41:13

You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3: 41:14

So I think about you in those scenarios because I'm like I saw Heath do some incredible things on the second stage and one of my favorite things that I did was something that I had to create for myself my cabaret. I had to put that together myself, put it on stage, get the band together and do everything, and then I was able to accomplish something that people were like yo, that was so dope. And I was talking to Bob Cherkio, who was the guy who handles most of the theaters there, and he was telling me about how, yeah, my student cabaret was the one that had the most people come to it up to that point. They called me in that week before the show because they saw the facebook event had over 85 people coming and so they were having their weekly meeting and brought it up, was like, hey, just so you know, dominique has a show this weekend and on Facebook it says there's gonna be 89 people there and Dom said there's gonna be more. So they called me out of the box office. It was like Dominique, uh, we hear your show's gonna have this many people.

Speaker 3: 42:21

And I was like, yeah, and I'll never forget them being like that's the most any student ran recital has ever had and I was like, oh, that's dope, the idea that I had to do that myself. And then I got to work with the students and we built it up to where it was Wouldn't have been possible if I wasn't pushing for myself. And you had to do the same thing with those second stage shows. It was like this is where I'm going to get noticed, this is where I'm going to get to stretch myself, this is where I'm going to actually be able to do the thing I love. So I got to kill it. When did you even feel like you were good, if you felt good, and where did that passion come from?

Speaker 1: 43:02

Oh, man, I've always wanted to be an artist, from when I was little. It just had always changed, I guess venues because, I started out.

Speaker 1: 43:13

I was a really good artist when I was a child and I was like, oh, I'm going to be a, I'm going to be an artist and I'm going to. But I could never figure out like painting and getting good at that. I could draw well, I guess my heart wasn't in it that much. And then I got into music and I was like, oh, I'm going to be a punk rock, pop punk star. Yeah, wrote bad songs and I'm going to be this type of art. And I remember talking to my this is so dumb I remember talking to my Mrs Riddle, my childhood art teacher, because I had told her I wanted to be an artist and then I started to get more into music.

Speaker 1: 43:52

It just stands out in my memory. I remember talking to her once.

Speaker 1: 43:55

She probably didn't give a fuck, but I was like I'm just gonna be a different kind of artist yeah then high school happened and I'm doing the band thing, the pretty teacher talked me into auditioning for the play yeah, and it was a musical, and I was like I'll audition as long as I don't have to sing any solos. And uh, she was like, okay, and then I got a part and it was like this rock star guy and I had to sing it. So I was like, but this teacher's hot, so I guess I'll do it. Yeah, a little 14-year-old Heath, 14-year-old chubby Afro Heath, yeah. But what it all boils down to, I guess, is when I was really little, my favorite movie has always been Ghostbusters, yep. And I remember growing up I had this Ghostbusters jumpsuit for a child and whenever I grew out of it I just kind of cut it to where it would be a jacket that I could still wear, so I wouldn't just have to get rid of it. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 44:54

And I was always like I'm going to be a Ghostbuster when I grow up. When I grew up, I learned that there weren't really Ghostbusters like that and I was like, well, I want to do what they did. I mean, I went through all that. Oh, I'm going to be an artist and then I'm going to be a musician. But I guess at the core of it, I've always, always wanted to be an actor and a performer, because if I couldn't be a Ghostbuster, I wanted to do what those guys did Bill Murray, harold Ramis, dan Aykroyd They've always been huge influences and I feel like I've always seen Bill Murray in you.

Speaker 3: 45:33

I always see that that quick, goofy humor within the things that you do, especially when you're performing or just in general when we're talking. And of course I know about Ghostbusters being your favorite, but you know Bill Murray, being the guy that he is, makes total sense. That's where you started. Yeah, because every time you got on stage you always had this quick humor and that comes from, like you said, listening to what's going on. I don't think people comprehend that enough.

Speaker 3: 46:02

I talked about that to a friend recently. They were asking me, like when I'm on stage, when I'm singing, like how do I make it original or how do I do the same songs over and over and over again? And I was like in college when Ken would talk to us about doing certain things on stage. He said you should be listening. And when you do your monologue it's almost as if you're just saying it for the first time. And so when I go perform and when I do any performance, it doesn't matter if I'm doing the wedding singing, if I'm singing my own songs.

Speaker 3: 46:33

When I go up there and sing, I try to sing it different every time. I might hit some notes the same way, but I might wait a little longer. When I'm saying a word, one time I might make crack a little bit. I might not sing it as clearly as I did the other day, I might whisper. You know, I always switch it up because it's new. It's me giving it a new experience, it's me thinking about it differently. It's me thinking about what am I about to say? Even though I know what I'm about to say and I could see that in the performances you would do too. You always found the way, one, to mess with somebody while you were on stage or try to break someone while they were on stage or doing something, and two, to try to really push yourself to be as good as you could be. Am I overthinking that? Or is that facts? Because I feel like that was facts.

Speaker 1: 47:23

That's facts.

Speaker 1: 47:24

I'm probably the worst scene partner to have because I'd always judge if I was doing well, if I could make my partner laugh, yeah. And then, god, you're just making me think of all these things because I remember a couple of the side stage, the second stage shows. They were always cast by students and directed by students. I remember I hate to sound like a pretentious actor guy, but still discovering things even on show night. Yeah, one of them, I was a sexy fireman or something like that. Yeah, I was just moving around the space and I just felt the need that I had to slap Charles Davis's ass, and I don't think he was ready for it, but I was trying to seduce everybody in the room, so I thought that that would be a good thing to do. There's another one, I think it was directed by Kyle Van Poole's Sorted Lives.

Speaker 3: 48:22

Yeah, Sorted Lives.

Speaker 1: 48:23

I was playing the old man. I forget his name, I forget pretty much everything about it. I think that I had peg legs or something like that. Anyways, I was at a funeral for my wife, my Peggy. I was going up to see her casket and I, just on the night, performance night in front of an audience I hadn't done this before I remember I started to walk towards the casket because that was my big moment like oh, peggy, peggy, peggy, peggy, peggy just kept saying but I kind of stopped on my way there and I had this button-up shirt on.

Speaker 1: 48:55

It was untucked and I just kind of tucked in one side of it, kind of like, and then I heard the audience like, oh, like he's trying to look nice for and I don't know why, but I was just like I gotta look nice for my I'm at a funeral.

Speaker 3: 49:10

I remember that night. Actually I remember that moment, what you're talking about. It's bizarre that you say that, but it was very genuine and damn, that's dope dope. I didn't know that you had never done that before. I thought that was scripted.

Speaker 1: 49:27

Maybe it was, I don't know. Thinking back, I'm like was it scripted? Now I'm second guessing myself.

Speaker 3: 49:37

Once again, if I understand anything, I understand that I feel like with every character and this is something that kind of. I remember I went to LA for some reason I'm not going to say who but there were people who kind of presented me as just a singer and it was bizarre because I was like I am a trained actor. Thank you very much. So when I think about characters and moments, it takes me back to Hamlet, me and Jeremy as Rosa Cranston, guildenstern. It was so much fun, dude, it was so much fun. And I still remember the last night we had this moment because there was a scene where we're confronted by Hamlet, and I still remember Alex Clear was on stage with Andrew who was playing Hamlet, and Alex didn't wear glasses or contacts during that show so he couldn't see us. But this night specifically, he wore contacts and so he could actually see Jeremy and I and Jeremy and I were facing him and back to the audience, so no one could see us. But we were just like mean mugging Alex and we were like we're going to fuck you up, like we was like looking at him, like we would kick you out, like it was so fun and we always it, stretched, it, stretched it, and that was the night. I remember getting a reaction from alex because he actually could see us.

Speaker 3: 51:12

Yeah, and, like you said, it's one of those things that when you're on stage and you're in character and trying to create this world and trying to do it especially people like us who just die for this stuff we love this stuff. This is stuff that I've always wanted to do. There's nothing that you can't do on stage. There's nothing you can't discover, and I always, like I said, I always admired you on stage for the work that you put in. I'm so pumped that you're working more in commercials and pushing out and auditioning for more and getting more work. I hope you keep going because, dude, you have always been an inspiration when it comes to getting on stage and trying to go full out for whatever you're doing. You've always done that. I've always admired that. I don't want you to think that this is coming from like, oh, I'm just saying this to say it. No, I really wanted you to hear that and understand that. I saw that from the beginning. You told me what you wanted to do. You.

Speaker 1: 52:07

I saw how passionate you were about it and it's just dope to see you still going, man well, it's, uh, it all actually comes back to your wedding because, as you said, my, uh, my priorities changed after college meeting april getting married, starting family continuing, the family continuing the family, yeah and then just getting various jobs to support the family.

Speaker 1: 52:29

and then you met adrian and you guys get married and you asked me to be in your wedding and just seeing everybody from college a couple people in my mind that stuck out that I see that I have a lot of respect for in my eyes they're they're out there doing it. Well, besides you, but you're like my best friend, you're always going to be oh you should do this, you should do this, and I guess they're.

Speaker 1: 52:56

They're really good friends as well. But uh, abby Vatterot, she was kind of like you should get in touch with my agent and you should go for it, because you were always really funny. Mark Richard, he introduced me to his girlfriend and he introduced me as one of the funniest guys he's ever met and ever known. And I was like man, like just hearing people talk about kind of like you just did, kind of making me blush over here hearing what people think about my, my skills and my talent. And I talked to April. I was like man, maybe I should go for it. And she's kind of like well, duh, yeah, like why, haven't you been.

Speaker 1: 53:37

Yeah but I think it was just kind of a mental block, like I've got other things I have to take care of first and yeah, I've, uh, I've gotten back into it. I, I, I signed with the same agency that Abby's at after putting her name on there.

Speaker 3: 53:52

Like hey, I know her.

Speaker 1: 53:53

Yeah, I know her. She's good, so maybe I'm a little good because I know her.

Speaker 3: 53:58

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 53:58

It's been a lot of fun. And going back to the second stage, like you were talking, I don't think I've ever seen myself ever really yearn to be like the main character. You know, there's always a lot more fun finding the people that are supporting Like. I don't really see myself as a main man, leading man man yeah I just like.

Speaker 1: 54:20

Creating the characters like this is also another stupid thing. I got a commercial not too long ago. It was for a tire company. I thought I was going to be a wheel right because I didn't get one of the speaking parts, so I thought I was going to be this guy in the background making like wagon wheel yeah for like weeks leading up to it, I was on youtube watching videos about how to make wagon wheels and looking up all the different terms and stuff.

Speaker 1: 54:45

Yeah, it's ridiculous to think about because it's for, like, a little commercial that don't have any lines for, and you kind of see me in the background and then I ended up being a blacksmith.

Speaker 3: 54:55

Anyways, you've done a great job. We made it to the end of the episode. We have? Yes, that we have. And, with that being said, at the end of every episode, I always ask the exact same thing. How do you feel?

Speaker 1: 55:20

I feel great, feel great, been talking to my best friend for an hour. How about that? Yeah, we don't get like. We text every now and then, but we never get to just have a chat.

Speaker 3: 55:32

Oh yeah, if I call, it's usually I'm calling April and you're there, but I'm talking to the girls.

Speaker 1: 55:38

Or sometimes I'm at work and you're just talking to calling to talk to the girls.

Speaker 3: 55:41

Yeah, yeah, I'm at work and you're just talking to call on to talk to the girls yeah, yeah, yeah, it's always, I know, but I appreciate you, man. This is always great and I tell people this all the time. This is why I do the pod. I get an opportunity to one host a show like I've always wanted to host a show, but two, I get to talk to people that I love about things. That one we don't really get to talk about. I never knew that story about you and april going the saffron and you know different stuff like that. I've known you forever but I still get to learn about the people I love the most and I appreciate your time.

Speaker 1: 56:13

Cheers to you cheers to you, my friend. I love you, bud. Love you too, man. Thanks for having me on.

Speaker 3: 56:26

I want to thank you for listening to the Black man Talking Emotions podcast. The opening quote credit goes to Earl Nightingale and shout out to Heath for being on the pod. Follow Heath at H-E-A-T-H-B-U-H on Instagram. Please subscribe to the podcast, share the podcast and give us a good rating. Five stars, please, and thank you. You can support the show by clicking the link at the bottom of the episode description. Also, tell me your plans for this coming year. We should collab. Follow me at D-O-M-L underscore A-M-O-U-R on Instagram or at domamorecom. I'm Dom Lamore. Much love, Thank you.