Unlock the mysteries of the mind with Xenia Economidou, our esteemed guest trained in Marisa Peer’s Rapid Transformational Therapy method (RTT).
In this episode we journey deep into the subconscious and learn about ways we can reframe and dismantle the limiting beliefs that have been steering our lives since childhood.
Xenia Economidou brings to light the profound connection between our past experiences and current self-perceptions, demonstrating that what we see as an unchangeable identity can be reshaped with the right tools.
In the conversation we explore the notion that the journey of healing and self-discovery lies within our grasp. Emphasising the importance of taking ownership of our internal processes.
You can reach Xenia Economidou (Rapid Transformational Therapy Practitioner) at: xeniaeco@gmail.com
+357 99318145
Disclaimer
The information provided in Midweek Insights is for general informational purposes only and is not intended as professional advice. Listeners should seek professional advice relevant to their specific circumstances before making any decisions.
This podcast is NOT intended to replace professional medical advice.
midweekinsights@gmail.com
Subscribe for all the new episodes!
https://www.instagram.com/midweekinsights/?
The information provided in Midweek Insights is for general informational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as professional advice. Listeners should seek professional advice relevant to their specific circumstances before making any decisions.
While we strive to provide accurate and up-to-date information, the dynamic nature of certain topics may result in changes or updates. Midweek Insights does not guarantee the accuracy, completeness, or suitability of information discussed in the episodes.
Guests on Midweek Insights express their own opinions, which may not necessarily align with the views of the host. We encourage listeners to form their own opinions based on additional research and diverse perspectives.
Unlock the mysteries of the mind with Xenia Economidou, our esteemed guest trained in Marisa Peer’s Rapid Transformational Therapy method (RTT).
In this episode we journey deep into the subconscious and learn about ways we can reframe and dismantle the limiting beliefs that have been steering our lives since childhood.
Xenia Economidou brings to light the profound connection between our past experiences and current self-perceptions, demonstrating that what we see as an unchangeable identity can be reshaped with the right tools.
In the conversation we explore the notion that the journey of healing and self-discovery lies within our grasp. Emphasising the importance of taking ownership of our internal processes.
You can reach Xenia Economidou (Rapid Transformational Therapy Practitioner) at: xeniaeco@gmail.com
+357 99318145
Disclaimer
The information provided in Midweek Insights is for general informational purposes only and is not intended as professional advice. Listeners should seek professional advice relevant to their specific circumstances before making any decisions.
This podcast is NOT intended to replace professional medical advice.
midweekinsights@gmail.com
Subscribe for all the new episodes!
https://www.instagram.com/midweekinsights/?
The information provided in Midweek Insights is for general informational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as professional advice. Listeners should seek professional advice relevant to their specific circumstances before making any decisions.
While we strive to provide accurate and up-to-date information, the dynamic nature of certain topics may result in changes or updates. Midweek Insights does not guarantee the accuracy, completeness, or suitability of information discussed in the episodes.
Guests on Midweek Insights express their own opinions, which may not necessarily align with the views of the host. We encourage listeners to form their own opinions based on additional research and diverse perspectives.
Welcome to Midweek Insights. Again Today we are going to be exploring powerful tools around personal growth and self-discovery. Today we have Xenia Economido. She is an expert in electronic engineering and information security, turned mind explorer. She has done a whole bunch of training with the likes of Brendan Brashard and Tony Robbins, renowned world coaches. But mostly we are going to focus on her work as a rapid transformational therapist. She trained with the world-renowned Marisa Peer, a hypnotherapist psychologist, and Xenia is here to help us demystify hypnosis, to clear some misconceptions around it, to talk about its potential for transformation and all sorts of other things that come up in the episode. So welcome, xenia Economido. I'm so delighted to have you here with me today and to learn from you and about your work.
Speaker 2:So happy to be here. Thank you so much for the introduction.
Speaker 1:Great to have you. So, Xenia, a lot of people might be listening and thinking okay, hypnotherapy, what is it exactly? And if you could give us a brief overview of it and its role in the therapeutic modality?
Speaker 2:Yes, absolutely. Thank you so much. So hypnotherapy is a natural state of the brain where we can have a conversation, a dialogue with the subconscious so we can become aware of the patterns, traumas, limiting beliefs we're holding, without even knowing. Because that's what something being registered in the subconscious means that we're not aware of it, we're not conscious of it. And through hypnosis that is what we do we go into the subconscious and we see what limiting beliefs we're holding, what traumas have been registered, and usually it's either interpretations and events that happen before the age of seven, interpretations of us as children, because we don't have critical thinking or filters up to that age, so by definition, we distort reality.
Speaker 2:And because we're not able to articulate and express that whatever is registered in the subconscious, our surrounding environment, our parents, teachers, are not able to speak into it and help us see the truth. For example, a father saying to the child go to bed, it's late, right? And the child might feel I'm not wanted, I'm not loved, I'm too small to be around the adults. I mean, it's the simplest of things most of the times, right. Of course I always mention if there is violence or abuse or a war. That's a completely different story, but more often than not it's the simplest of things and through hypnosis we are able to go and find these interpretations, see, as adults, if they are beneficial to our lives today and finally let go, because our lives are dictated by those beliefs and we don't even know it.
Speaker 1:So we're looking at a young child who might be told to go to bed and interpret. How do we know that now that child, in its adult years, has taken certain things that have like that example and have affected them in a way that is blocking them now?
Speaker 2:People who turn into hypnosis. They usually come with a symptom. I mean, sometimes, of course, we have the exception of the rule where people are healthy and happy and fully functioning and they want to do hypnosis because they want to grow and be even better version of themselves. There is always something they're holding us back and someone who understands that. They want to see what else is there that I can let go, so I can become even more, because our potential is huge. An example of that is someone who works in the oil industry that's a true story and has a monthly salary of 8 million US dollars and wants to jump into a monthly salary of 11 million dollars. It's like full, healthy, happy, family, absolutely wealth, and they want to do hypnosis because they feel not good enough for the 11 million or they're not asking for it, and it's like mind blowing.
Speaker 2:The rule, though, is that people come in with a symptom. They come in with a destructive behavior or a dominant feeling during their daily lives that's holding them back. Maybe that's fear of rejection, fear of failure, relationship issues, addictions, alcohol, sugar, tobacco, smoking, depression. It could be lack of motivation, self-esteem, confidence. People identify with different symptoms and, more often than not, use different words with it. Identifying with the actual symptom is not the way to go. It's different to say I have depression or I'm going through depression.
Speaker 1:Why is that difficult? You go into that because I think it's important.
Speaker 2:Yes, absolutely. When we accept something as who we are, then it's like saying there is something wrong with us, we are broken or damaged or less than others, where the truth is that we have just developed a pattern that is not serving. We are beings of habits. Even the fears of rejection or failure, depression, addictions these are just habits and patterns. It's different to say I'm going through an addiction or I have an addiction, because it's like saying I have this pattern and I want to change the pattern. Compared to I am, I am an addict, which means that, yes, by definition, there is something wrong with me. It's much more difficult to change the identity of someone than a pattern or a habit they have developed.
Speaker 1:How can you get people to change those identities, because I'm sure most people come in with the identity label. Is there a process for breaking that down and separating? Do you also face a lot of resistance? People want to hold on to that because this is so deeply ingrained that they are attached to who they are and they believe it to their core.
Speaker 2:So yes, through the process of RTT, the rapid transformation of therapy, which is the modality of hypnosis I am following, what we do is that first we help the individual become aware of how something began or how a limiting belief was registered in the subconscious, and so on. And how does that happen? So someone comes in and says I am depressed, let's use the identity part I am depressed, or I am an addict or alcoholic. So we use the issue, so we guide people into the subconscious, which is a simple method of visualization, going down the 10 steps. That's symbolic to the nervous system, that we're going deeper into their consciousness, which is the subconscious mind.
Speaker 2:It's absolutely safe. It's a very subtle state and people can easily come out of it, in a sense of, even for a few minutes. If we stop talking, they will come out of it. So we use the issue they are using, they are using to identify themselves with. And what we're saying is that we want to go to the root, the cause of Xenia's addiction or Xenia's depression. When we are in hypnosis we don't say we want to see why Xenia is an addict or why Xenia is depressed. So that's the first step of this associating, showing people that it's a behavior they have developed and not an inherent quality that they've carried, I guess, with them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Yeah, so to separate, to actually disassociate now to disconnect, yeah.
Speaker 2:And then we use recreation, we go back in the past to see what happened that caused them to adopt a limiting belief, right, and then we help them disassociate themselves from that event. So an example is my father was not allowing me to play with the other children, or I was too loud, and he would always say be more quiet, you're disturbing us. If you want to be around us, just keep quiet. Stop singing or dancing, you know?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah, which feels like a normal reaction.
Speaker 2:Or parents, yeah but when children are too hyper at times. So if, as a child, the interpretation is that when I'm lively, when I'm loud, I don't get love, then the limiting belief is that if I am quiet and do what everyone else is doing, then I will feed in and get love. The child is not aware of this belief and is not aware the moment is being registered. But then they become an adult and instead of being in theater or in the arts, for example, right or a senior, they are an accountant, they work for the government. I'm just saying an example. Right and inside they feel miserable because they're not in their own path, they're not doing what brings life to them, and that's how depression is developed. This is just a simple example. I mean, you can have literally infinite ways of how someone can become depressed and it's simply not following their heart and what brings life to them. Right, and that's so easy in our societies. Because we want to feed in, we want to do what others are doing have a steady job, a family. You know, like certain rules, that when you go too out of that it's, it's just too scary and and people are fearful of rejection, of not getting love. That is the matter of self-worth. So people comply with certain rules without even knowing it, and these these compliance is a result of limiting beliefs that have been registered early on without them even knowing, and the destructive behavior is simply a way of the personality choosing how to express the problem the limiting belief. So someone with a limiting belief can of feeling too small, for example, and always been told you're too small, everyone is bigger than you. Or maybe they were beaten at school, maybe they were beaten at home and just want to feel big and strong right, and they grew up seeing their parents sometimes having a drink right or with friends and so forth, and and they were taught that alcohol is not for children, it's for grown-ups. You have to be big to be able to drink right, and that's registered, that for someone to drink, it means they are big. So now they have this program. Let's say it's like a code, like whenever I drink, I feel big. That's how the, that's why we call it programming I'm not fond of the term, but it's pretty accurate and so the, the personality now, in order to express this limiting belief, finds turns to alcohol right. So the person is not an alcoholic, is a person with a limiting belief whose expression is to turn to alcohol, and that's very different.
Speaker 2:So when we go back and we see that in regression in hypnosis, then we guide people in separating themselves from that, for example, saying that I am not three anymore, I know what being worthy and whole means and I don't need alcohol to give me that feeling or concept. So the disassociation happens during hypnosis. The person itself says the words that are disassociating them from their belief, even though even if they've made it an identity they see, like when they see how it was created and it's a limiting belief expressing itself and not them as as humans. Right then, that's how we disassociate and of course there are exercises we can do in hypnosis that we find which part of their personality decided that alcohol addiction was the way to go, and on birth with that part. So we may ask what's your function? And more often than not we get to protect them.
Speaker 2:For example, someone who gets sick all the time. It's like why were you developed? We talked to that part itself and the answer is to get love, because whenever they were sick when they were a child, they would get affection and attention. Maybe was to protect them because they had violence in the house and and when they would be sick they wouldn't be beaten up, for example, right.
Speaker 2:So there are exercises to go even deeper and we actually ask the person while in hypnosis are you ready to let go of this pattern? More often than not we get a yes, because people I mean the intention of people coming for a therapy session and hypno-therapy session is I want to let go, I want to be free of this pattern, of this behavior. There are times the answer is no. So then we, we converse with that part. It's first of all knowledge. We think that part, yes, okay, can you please have a lesser role while we change some patterns around this part, while you know, for example, maria will still be protected, or with these new patterns, she will be loved. So your role is not as necessary. And if that happens in the first, for example, session, usually you see in follow-up sessions people are more eager to let go there. That part is convinced that now a healthier part of themselves has taken over do you always know at what moment that has happened?
Speaker 1:or do you, how do you know when to keep going there and that it's a resounding yes and the change has happened, or if you need to keep revisiting that specific situation or scenario?
Speaker 2:like when there is strong addiction that's has been taking, that has been going on for a long time, usually with chronic behaviors, right? I mean, if there is an addiction that has been going on for a very long time, or depression, it's it's more likely that the mechanism that has been developed, which is a survival mechanism, and that part wants the best of us they it doesn't want to hurt us, but, based on what we knew when that mechanism was developed, it was the best we could come up with, right? So if, if there is something that has been going on for a long time, then it's, it's pretty much necessary to go even deeper, sometimes from the disassociation like saying, okay, now I know better, because we ask them to say, for example, something happened when they were three or five. We ask them in hypnosis because we're having a dialogue. Is that a beneficial belief? Do you want to keep carrying it? If they say no, of course not, and I'm not three anymore, I'm not five anymore and I know better, then it's easier to move on.
Speaker 2:If, if they're like, if it's difficult for them to let go of that, pardon, it's like, but who am I if that's not there anymore? Right, yes, yes, yes, then we have to go even deeper and talk to that pardon and see, because it's the survival mechanism was developed to protect us, by definition, even if it led to a destructive behavior. So it's like asking someone to let their guard down. They need to feel safe, they need to feel convinced that they now know better and with their new patterns they will get what they got with a destructive behavior, and that's usually love, attention, acknowledgement, feeling enough and so forth.
Speaker 1:So when you say the new patterns now you've challenged the past belief, you've reframed it or understood that that was three year old, not serving me now. How do you then instill new patterns to replace that? Does that happen in hypnosis as well?
Speaker 2:Yes, absolutely so. The first step is the awareness, then the dissociation, and then what we call reframe, which is the elimination of the limiting beliefs, for example, that the belief that sugar is love now is even your system, forever right and we go through or not feeling enough is now eliminated and vanished. I mean, we say a few sentences that help the subconscious start to let go of these limiting, false beliefs I mean limiting beliefs, by definition, false, right? So? And then the next part is what we call the transformation, which is the giving back to the person the true beliefs, the real beliefs. And an example of that is you are whole and strong and you can do anything you want. You know, you know that you matter. You are enough for someone who feels small and wants to drink, right, alcohol is irrelevant to you. You're choosing to lead a healthy life and you're proud of your choices. That's an example, right, it can be the same with sugar and fear of rejection, fear of failure, so forth.
Speaker 2:That part that we call transformation and is the last part. So it's like going in the subconscious, finding a limiting belief, disassociating, deleting. Then we need to replace that with something else, because I mean hypnosis. At the end of the day, is all based on neuroscience. It's, even though there is so much fear around it, it's all science. And what happens during hypnosis is that neuro connections that we're supporting a destructive behavior are now changed. We break these connections and then, with the transformation, we need to create new ones. We don't just associate, eliminate the beliefs and then you're good to go. We need to create the new connections and that's why we give back to the individual while in hypnosis the new beliefs, the life without the problem as they want, and define it right.
Speaker 2:And this is the part that we talk with the individual prior to hypnosis, during what we call the discovery call. So we ask them to define in their own words what does life without the problem look like? Because it's really important for them while in hypnosis to give them back their own words. The subconscious will understand and recognize their own words and respond to those words even better If we as practitioners just start making up something we think looks nice for everyone. Maybe it's something we want, right. So we use their own words, the way they've defined it and, of course, with what comes up during the session, we complete that part we call transformation.
Speaker 2:And the most important part of our work is that that part is recorded. We create a hypnosis audio based on that part, so we guide them down the 10 steps and then we give them the transformation, the positive things that are creating their life as they wanted today, and we ask them to listen to that audio for the next 21 to 30 days at least once a day. And that's so important for our work, because this subconscious responds to repetition. It's like having a transformation during hypnosis, seeing what's possible, experiencing what's possible to make that part of our reality. We need to give repetition to the subconscious. We need to feed it daily. That's how the new neural connections are created. So people are playing a huge role in their journey and that's why it's important for people to be determined and willing to take responsibility and also do the work. It's not like a magic formula.
Speaker 1:You just sit there and you let someone fix.
Speaker 2:Yeah absolutely so it's ownership.
Speaker 1:I think that also that probably reaches to people who are worried about losing control and coming to the mercy of the therapist, so giving them that sense of autonomy that they are still in very much in control. No one's playing with their mind or suggesting things that they do not wish to achieve or accomplish.
Speaker 2:Exactly. People are fully aware of what's been said during hypnosis and they are in full control of what they are sharing so many people. Many times I'm asked by people what if I don't want to share something? Or what if you ask me something I don't want to disclose? And the answer is so simple you just don't say something, you don't say anything. You are allowed to say I don't want to answer that or no, right In hypnosis. And people cannot accept false suggestions while in this specific modality and state of mind, because it's so subtle and they're fully aware, for example, maybe they can even correct us, like saying to someone, to a woman that and now, how does your husband react? I'm just saying, and she would go kiss my boyfriend, we're not married yet. And then continue answer the question, right, so you can't give to someone something they will not accept there is. The practitioner does not have control over people in therapeutic hypnosis, right? And it's so unfortunate that this term is used for entertainment and for modalities that people are doing that to other people.
Speaker 1:So why you said also 21 to 30 days? Is there reason for the specific amount of time?
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, usually it takes at least 21 days of repetition for a new habit and new pattern to be created Using hypnosis. Usually, you know, people might say 60 plus days or 90 days and so forth to create a new habit. Or, you know, people have different numbers for what they believe through coaching, for example, or changing your mindset In hypnosis. The ideal is at least 21 days and we say 30 because the follow up session usually takes place 30 days apart next month. So if someone is to go through a series of hypnosis sessions, we recommend three sessions and they take place once per month for three consecutive months. So we ask people to listen to their audio in between our sessions. Each session, of course, they will get a new recording because new things come out and it's fully customized.
Speaker 2:And having said that, of course I've had people listening to their recordings for months after our session and just getting a phone call six months later saying I'm having the time of my life or things are still changing. I cannot believe it and I'm still listening to the recording. They're invited to do so. They get to keep their recordings, so they get to listen to them whenever they need to. So after our last session, they can continue for as long as they like. The recommendation as practitioners to at least to that is 21 days. For that reason, for how long it takes with hypnosis to change a pattern, to create a new neuroconnection, so are there things that cannot be helped in this process and things that can?
Speaker 1:Let's just break it down to that.
Speaker 2:Yes, absolutely so. People with diagnosis in epilepsy, for example, psychosis or schizophrenia, multiple personality disorders, are advised not to proceed with hypnosis. And, of course, people that are not in this group and they're carrying, you know, they just want to discover what's in their subconscious, whether that's into destructive behavior or not Then that's the way to go, because we know that the mind is 5% conscious and 95% subconscious. It means that we don't know what's in the 95% of our mind, which is patterns and behaviors and memory of past events and stories. Right, I mean what we think is real, who we think we are, how we relate to one another. We think it's the conscious mind, but it's not so. Hypnosis is the most efficient awareness exercise to visit the subconscious and see what's there.
Speaker 1:And you also said earlier that you take them back to remember things that they may have forgotten. You know what started. Are there situations where people actually completely cannot access the memories? How can that be helped?
Speaker 2:Yes, it might happen that either people are blocking themselves, stopping their, they're trying to control the situation so they're not letting go, they're not allowing it to happen, or something so traumatic happened that has blocked those parts. So, since this is an extra state of the brain, the waves that the mind connects to in hypnosis, it means that everyone, by definition, can access that state, because we do when we first wake up and just before we go to bed at night and during the day, without knowing it, it's a state we can access at any time. So if someone is not, it means they're too scared, they're trying to control the situation or something really traumatic happened. In these cases we focus on, we have visualization exercises, we work with the inner child and we go back and find through visualization. So instead of asking them what they remember, then we actually guide them in visualization exercises of, for example, go back to your childhood home between the ages of 28 and see the child version of yourself, what's happening, what's the dominant feeling, so we actually give them content To start creating an image around their childhood.
Speaker 2:Then what we truly are interested in in hypnosis and with the subconscious mind are the images and the emotions, so the language of the conscious mind is language, words and logic. The language of the subconscious mind is emotions and images. So we're focusing on emotions and images to start engaging conversation with the subconscious mind. And the most important thing to note here is that, in contrast with the conscious mind that might block things or not say things as they are because of fear of rejection, fear of failure, ego, protective personality and so forth, these subconscious cannot lie. So when we ask the question to the subconscious, what's happening there or how do you feel, it does not distort, it cannot change. So we are actually having an honest conversation with ourselves and, of course, from that we share what we feel comfortable with. So, yes, when people are either too fearful or too controlling or there is trauma that has been blocked, we're using exercises in our child visualization exercises to help them establish a connection with their subconscious based on the dominant emotions in their childhood, and we take it from there.
Speaker 2:It rarely happens that someone will see nothing for the whole session. Usually, when people are blocking it, we have exercises to help them let go and then, instead of three scenes, which is the average number of scenes we go back to, we have one visualization exercise and two scenes. That's usually what happens. If someone doesn't see any of the scenes, which is very rare then we work with the emotions. And because we're working with the emotions, we're still working with the subconscious, and even them saying that there is fear, like maybe they went through war or there was violence in the house as a child.
Speaker 2:They know what the dominant emotion is, so we work with that. And then, of course, we give them their audio and every, because the audio is a hypnosis audio. They get in the habit of establishing connection with their subconscious on a daily basis, feeding it with information. That is true to them, and the follow up sessions are completely different. They are ready to let go because they now know what to expect. They don't feel they need to control as much as before and there is nothing to fear about.
Speaker 1:So they can establish the trust through that first process and then they can say, okay, it's safe, right, I can let go, I can reveal and release. And how long are these effects? How the lasting results do they last is what I wanted to ask, because let's just say someone's coming to stop sugar or stop smoking or whatever alcohol. Is there a time period where it might revisit or when a trigger comes again? Like what does that look like?
Speaker 2:Okay, that's a great question, Thank you. So, depending on what it is and how long it's been going on, then of course, because we're working with their roots and not the symptom in hypnosis, right. So we're working with the trauma or limiting belief that's now causing the or expressing itself through smoking or sugar, addiction, alcohol and so forth. When we work directly with the root like, for example, if we were working with the symptom then and someone had that limiting belief or trauma trying to express itself, right, and we just work with the symptom, then the person would just find that mechanism, would just find a different way, equally or more destructive, to express itself with. And that's why we see people when they stop smoking, they gain weight, when they quit drugs, they go into alcohol, it's because there's a revival mechanism, is still there.
Speaker 2:What we are doing in RTT is that we're working with the root. So once we address and heal the root, then the substance by definition becomes irrelevant to the person. It loses power over the person and, of course, with their audios, their repetition and so forth, people overcome these patterns and habits. So very often what we do is that we recommend an average of three sessions and within those three sessions the vast majority overcomes their symptoms and, of course, heals a big part of the root. It may happen that, you know, in six months or a year we get a phone call of a follow up session. That can happen. It's absolutely fine and it's better for, because in the 95% of subconscious we heal the big part, which was the survival mechanism that led to alcohol or depression, sugar, right.
Speaker 2:There is still a very big part in that 95% that we haven't addressed. So things might come up that are unrelated to what we heal, because once you've healed you can you created new neuro connections. That's done. But the other parts, of course it's that might need addressing and the survival mechanism might not be there of alcohol or sugar and so forth. But the person, through memory, just might feel that it's the familiar. So maybe something might happen in six months or a year and they might feel that this is how I react, it's the familiar. So in that case what we recommend is that, instead of relapsing or creating a new habit from scratch based on memory and not on trauma or limiting beliefs, come in for a session and let us heal that part that now is arising.
Speaker 1:I want to ask you so is there a case that you've dealt with one thing the sugar, the addiction and then some other things creep up after. So that's been dealt with, and then here's another indication of something else, another pattern. Do you need to keep coming back again? Or with this, can you handle quite a few things at once?
Speaker 2:So based on I mean, we give them the intake form, right, and it's a big list of symptoms and issues. Of course people come come in with their own and what we do is that we address the root of what they come in with. And there are different groups of symptoms, groups of behaviors. When we in the discovery call we decide what the priorities with the individual, we work on that. Maybe there are multiple issues, right. Maybe there is depression and addiction and relationship issues and childhood trauma and health issues, so it can be a variety of issues. Through our discussion in the discovery call prior to hypnosis, we help the individual choose what they want to work now because they need to choose one thing. That one thing will impact the rest, but we have groups of behaviors, groups of symptoms. So, yes, it will impact to the positive the rest, but if the others are in different groups then they need to be addressed in a different session.
Speaker 1:So someone who's listening and thinking to themselves yeah, xenia sounds great, but this won't work for me, or this is too good to be true. What would you say to that person?
Speaker 2:And it's completely understandable. And what I have to say to that person is that we were not told how we function. We are not aware of our own structure, our own minds. We have the power to change, to grow and heal, and the power comes through awareness, comes through understanding how we function, what we are made of, and then becoming aware of how, for example, our mind works. If we want to be healthy, we have to know how our body works, for example, our liver works, our heart. If we want to be mentally healthy, we need to know how the mind works and address the mind. And very often we see that there are different modalities or everyone's talking about the mindset, the new trend which are focused on the 5%, the conscious mind, like change your habits and creating new, like set up goals and accountability. And it's all great, but we cannot ignore that 95% of our minds.
Speaker 2:Hypnosis has been found to be the most efficient and safe way to access the subconscious mind and this has been, of course, supported by the work of Marisa Pierre, but also Bruce Lipton mentions that and Greg Graden and leaders in personal development, and the reason is that, regardless of the change we want to make in our lives, if there is a limiting belief that it never works for me, or my dreams are never available to me, are not available to me, or it happens to others but not me, that's a false limitation we are cutting. The only way to access it it's by going into the subconscious and seeing what's there. And hypnosis simply means a subtle state where the brain connects to different brain waves, very subtle state. It's all based on neuroscience and only by visiting and seeing what's there we can start changing it. And a few examples I can say is that might help the people listening is that, for example, I've had a lady come in for time management so she was overworked and going towards a burnout. During hypnosis we discovered that the person she was trying to impress and gain the love of was her father, who would always react and give attention when she would be an overachiever, so that, by definition, that mechanism led her to go towards burnout and nothing was ever enough of what she had on her plate.
Speaker 2:Right, this limiting beliefs, these mechanism, behaviors, as much as we try to understand them or access them through the conscious mind, we cannot. Why, even if we intellectually know something like smoking is bad or sugar is not love, right. There is a huge gap between knowing something intellectually and then actually living by it, and that gap is a missing link in the subconscious, which the subconscious, by definition is hidden. And we have this modality that finally allows us and by finally I'm saying I mean the past 150 years, but unfortunately, through the media and so forth, there is so much misconception that allows us to visit the subconscious and see what's there. And since I'm mentioning research, hypnosis has been found repeatedly to be one of the most efficient ways because it directly works with the subconscious and not the conscious mind like talk therapy. So it's been found, compared to other modalities of talk therapy, that it can be more efficient because it needs less sessions, and the reason is that it works with the root and it doesn't use the individual to talk about the same term.
Speaker 1:It's an important distinction. Some valuable tips or action steps for someone who might not be able to come to hypnosis, but through what you've learned through all the coaching experience you've had some things people can start doing today to become aware of some of these patterns. Because I think awareness is always the first step, because most of the time we're in default mode, we have no idea of the things we're doing. So, basically, valuable tips and action steps for the listener who can apply something that they hear today from this conversation.
Speaker 2:Yes, something I would advise people to do is journaling, because it helps declutter the mind, it helps express thoughts and emotions, and it's really important to become aware of thoughts and emotions. We are cutting without even knowing and it sounds such a funny thing to saying that I'm cutting thoughts and I don't even know it like I'm thinking and I don't even know what I'm thinking about. But that's what it means. The fact that the 5% of the mind is conscious. It means that it also means that 5% of the time we are conscious, we are working and functioning through the conscious mind, which means that the other 95%, we are on autopilot and we are functioning based on the programming and behaviors we have adopted during childhood and so forth, without even knowing so. And of course, the irony here is that other people are able to observe it. We are not. And of course, when we are confronted, it's like what are you talking about? I'm so quiet, I never shouted. It's like. So I would say first journaling, start observing yourselves. And another tip would be to set reminders on the phone like completely random, and then when you see the reminder, it can be like a funny message or like catch yourself, observe yourself and then sit for a couple of minutes when the reminder comes and observe, ask yourself what am I thinking right now? What am I feeling right now? Is it even mine? Where did this thought come from?
Speaker 2:If you catch yourself randomly during the day, you will be able to understand and see how you fall into patterns that are completely automatic and once you become, you start becoming aware of them. Then you become more conscious. It's like that's why everyone now talks about being present in the now, mindfulness because if we are unconscious or living our lives through the subconscious, it means that we're not aware of what's happening. It means we're not conscious, we're not intentional and, of course, we have no recollection of what's happening to monitor it. That's why maybe someone is identifying as a calm person and patient and able to control their graves, and then it's like you see a behavior completely different. And yet the person is not lying. It's just that the 5% of the time they are able to observe and monitor themselves, this is how they've defined themselves, and then, when they're on autopilot, anything can come out, because it's usually behaviors and patterns and beliefs of the surrounding environment, usually parents, during very early on the childhood.
Speaker 2:So it would be journaling, observing yourself through reminders on the phone and start questioning yourself, like when a thought comes up, ask where did it come from? Is it through a survival mechanism? Is it my own thought? Is it my mother's? Is it my father's? Through this behavior did I actually choose to show up this way? Am I trying to impress someone? What's happening here? So it would be through exercises of awareness and questioning oneself. So imagine, like until the age of 7, when we have no critical mind, no filters, but also no contrast, because we've been around for a very short period of time and everything works by contrast. Like now we're able to say, for example, to our partner I don't allow you or I don't accept this behavior because I know my self-worth and I'm setting boundaries. I'm just saying something. We are able to say that because of experience and contrast and awareness when you're a child you can't.
Speaker 2:It means that whatever happens, you accept it. And because as children, we are not able to blame our parents during childhood for whatever is happening, they are like a god to us.
Speaker 1:That's why, during teenage, years, things start to change.
Speaker 2:But during childhood we cannot blame our parents, the closest people to us, whoever that is, usually the parents. So, which means that if there is something going on in the house arguments screaming, you know, violence we as children cannot discern and say it's their own limitations, it's their own traumas, it has nothing to do with me. We cannot say that. So what we by definition accept as a belief system is that there is something wrong with me, I am not enough, I am not worthy of love, and that's why this is happening, because the mind needs to justify things and during childhood it's not able to, of course, accurately.
Speaker 2:So, by definition, there is self-blame, there is. Whatever is happening is linked, by definition, to our self-worth and we're not able to even articulate it. So at least the mother or the father can say it has nothing to do with you. I just had a long day, or someone said something and I took it out on you, I didn't mean to, or at your mother, your father, I didn't mean to. And so we carry this belief system, which is by definition distorted, and we now lead our lives in adulthood without knowing that it's based on the belief system of a three-year-old or a five-year-old.
Speaker 1:The thing is like what do you start working on?
Speaker 1:Yeah and sometimes, like you know, things I don't. You know it could be the same situation two different children, the one nothing, it didn't affect them in any negative way at all and then the other one had a sensitivity, like you said with that child before, about being short, right. So if already you have that sensitivity and feeling about being short, you're probably going to be more open to that suggestion. Or you know it's only for adults. Like you said, the alcohol, right. And then maybe, whereas I might have heard that and a sibling might have heard that and nothing affected me, but they took that on, or the other way around. This could also be with weight, like when you've been told as a child or you've gained, you've lost, you know whatever, even as a teenager, and eventually it becomes a focus in your grown-up life wanting to please through your weight loss, your image, or how you look, trying to, and who you're doing it for. At the end of the day, is it for the people outside to approve of you? It's a lot linked there.
Speaker 2:And very often without even knowing it, we want, we crave the love of a parent and in our subconscious or unconscious way of trying to get it, we want to look like them Because we feel that the more we are like them, even without unconsciously, the more we look like them. It means the more we feed in, the more love we will get, and so forth. And it may happen that people start smoking just because they want to hang out with their dad and their dad is cool and the dad is smoking, or the mother is overweight and by looking like here, it's like unconsciously brings them closer. There is a connection created, even though it is destructive. Sometimes it can be the simplest of things and sometimes it's just out of nothing, like thinking is this why I'm overweight? Is this why I'm drinking? It's like people become aware of the reason and it's like completely the smallest.
Speaker 1:Mind-blowing To finally understand it right. So did you see any major breakthroughs, like when you were doing this and you were helping people and on yourself as well. So what were some of the big ones that you experienced and saw?
Speaker 2:Yes, for example, I had a lady coming for body shaming. So we went back to the past and during her childhood she broke her leg. She was on bed rest and her brother was making fun of her and so forth. That was one of the scenes. The other was that her father was emotionally unavailable and was not expressive and we went back to a scene where one day he brought home two chocolate croissants and she linked that. I mean the interpretation, because it's never the event.
Speaker 1:That's scary.
Speaker 2:And that's why it's different. Like the same event impacts people differently, children differently, because interpretation, their giving, is completely different to it. And so, in hypnosis, we ask them what interpretation did you give to this event? What did you make this event mean to you? And the meaning she gave to the event is that my father loves me because he brought me two croissants. If he didn't, he wouldn't have brought me two croissants. So she linked that to love and therefore it was registered that the two croissants equal to love and therefore sugar. So now in her mid-40s she's struggling with dieting and weight loss and so forth, and whatever something happens either a loss or feeling lonely or stress then unconsciously it's like she's turned to sugar, without even knowing, and it's stronger than the willpower to sleep and maybe it could also be something happy happening.
Speaker 1:So sad, happy food. Right. The attachment to food, whether it's a yes, it's not just for bad events, right, it's the connection.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, yes, yes, yes. What's happening is that when we feel stressed, lonely, there is a big event in our houses families like, especially lots of family members, or something like war breaking out, and there is a lot of fear and stress People want to turn to a behavior that gives them comfort, that is familiar and that responds to a limitation, like response to them feeling small, response to them not feeling loved, response to them being alone, feeling alone. And usually these patterns are created from happy moments. Happy moments Like, for example, if someone falls and hurts themselves, that's not a happy moment, but the mother coming.
Speaker 1:Yeah, comfort, comfort, yeah. So you connect the comfort with the actual action. So did this lady with the croissants find a way to lose the weight and feel happy again?
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, and we actually went back to another scene that she's Greek and in their schools they sell chocolate croissants. And we went back to another scene. The third scene was that at school, whenever she wanted to buy croissants, she would always buy two.
Speaker 2:She could never buy one and she would always yes, and they were making fun of her at school and she didn't even know why, but it always had to happen that way. When she finally understood it, then she was able to disassociate love from sugar and start a journey of self love and self care and losing weight and being healthy, because now we replace that love is sugar to. I know what love is and love is self care and healthy foods and preparing my own meals, and it's a complete life changer. And the same with alcohol.
Speaker 2:The biggest, of course, results in hypnosis are usually the addiction based. So it's either smoking, alcohol, drug addiction, because it's just fascinating to see someone smoking for 20 years or being an alcoholic or having an alcoholic pattern, and then, after a few sessions, for the substance itself to completely like being irrelevant, to lose power over them, for them to identify as an on smoke here, or I don't drink. And these are our most powerful results because they are measurable. It's so fascinating to see, after one or two sessions, someone to stop drinking, who they have been for years, for example. And of course, the more subtle changes. Usually they're more subtle when it's fear of rejection, fear of failure, unless someone is up for leaving an abusive relationship.
Speaker 2:I had a woman. The woman who came in for time management was in an abusive relationship, and she came in for time management and it's like through hypnosis, when she went back to her childhood, one of the scenes it was here and her parents, and she realized at that moment that what I'm because her mother was in an abusive relationship as well. She realized in hypnosis that her life today is similar to her mother's side.
Speaker 1:Up until that point she couldn't see it. And so filters the filters just lock everything. Life filters.
Speaker 2:There is no alarm going on off.
Speaker 1:Yeah, something different, something foreign, familiar, and it's known, right. So that's what you say you attract what you know, unless you do the work to question it and to distance it from you.
Speaker 2:Exactly so the outcome of that that session was that she came in for time management and too many things from her plate, and then the outcome was here, realizing she's in an abusive relationship and finally leaving that relationship. So it. That's why we say it's what we don't know. We don't know, it's yeah yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's what you say is that it was the situation that brought them there, and then you dig in and find other things, which is it can also be terrifying, but I think that's why people come to you, right? They? They want to deal with something that's important enough, is a pain point enough to to get them into action, to reach out right. So it's like what you said it's either pain point that pushes them or it's hey, I'm at an okay place in my life, but there are things that I'm still not happy about, or there are things that are still there could be another level of something.
Speaker 2:These are the two, I think drivers to bring people to work with you, and exactly and just based on the awareness that there is so much to discover, simply from wanting to grow and become even more aware of ourselves. It's I mean, people follow these, go into this process to see what else is there that I don't even know. I don't know. It's like maybe I don't have a destructive behavior, but I'm like, if it's like what I like, the way I like to say to talk about it is like having a dark room right which is the 95% subconscious, and it's like maybe we have an idea of what's there, but for the most part we don't. Each time we visit, it's like we light up a corner, the light gets bigger, we start tight and declutter and throwing out garbage with things, what we didn't know was there. So each time we visit, it's just, it's so vast that you always, you always discover something and it's it's, it's an exercise, a practice someone can do, simply for awareness purposes.
Speaker 1:But then where does the line come in like? When do you stop, I mean doing the digging and the searching and the you know finding things. At what point does a person feel Okay, this is it, I've done the work, I've done the searching. Is there a point that it should stop?
Speaker 2:or I mean if someone who's had a set of sessions and discovered things, they've worked through it and now they're leading a life based on their own terms, they're happy, they're healthy, there are no limitations, they feel they can do whatever they want and create the life they love, then it's like there is. I wouldn't say, keep doing it, because it's 95%, like you always find something. No, it's like maybe, yeah, of course, they can develop their practices, their habits and lead a healthy and happy life. Because whether we want to like, acknowledge it or not, is that even the happiest or healthiest person like on earth, or wealthiest life has ups and downs. We think that once, once, people go through a series of therapy sessions or coaching sessions or whatever, it's like the downs are over and it's always up.
Speaker 2:No, life is always ups and downs. So maybe in their next low point they might you know, something else might come up and then they can revisit. Maybe it's in six months, a year, in two years. They can have one session instead of a series of sessions and just see okay, what's here? Why did I respond this way when I lost my job or or a family member died and so forth? It's, it's always there as a modality to help people, of course, heal from the root and understand, more importantly, the root it's. It's not necessarily something you just do like every month for the rest of your life because this is the way to go right. I mean, of course we do it as practitioners because it's what we do and we practice on one another as well and we exchange sessions, but for people, they can do as many as they think necessary and then just revisit, just have it as a modality, as an option In the future. It's not an ongoing thing, it's.
Speaker 1:That's a lot. That's a lot. I almost imagine having these two different realities, like the one you're living and then the one you're questioning. Everything you're doing like a little voice on your shoulder saying that's not true, try it this way. Oh, you said that, but you didn't mean that. Like it's, it can drive you a little nuts.
Speaker 2:Yes, I mean it's. It takes time to train the mind, to observe and and, of course, it's a process of making this up conscious, conscious, that's, that's how we raise awareness. We raise consciousness right, we bring it up into the conscious and, yes, there are different practices. It's a matter of training the mind and, of course, for whoever feels called to experience hypnosis and see what it's all about, to have guidance and support while in the process.
Speaker 1:So I'm going to put all your details, if someone wants to reach out to you, on the show notes as well. But as a parting thought for the listener, if they can take away one thing from this whole conversation, what would you really like them to take away from today's conversation?
Speaker 2:or to know what comes to mind and it's it's been my own personal breakthrough, and and that's how I shifted in in hypnosis and working with people is that there is so much we don't know. We don't know. It sounds like the quote of our times, but it's so important for us to start becoming aware at least of ourselves, how we function our structures and take responsibility and control of our own healing our own lives and the way we show up. It's it's not an excuse anymore to blame anyone outside of us. It's it's a journey of honor and it requires honesty and bravery. To someone looking deep within, what I want to let people a message is that you have the power to change and it's in your hands.
Speaker 1:That's very empowering and hopeful, of course. So thank you so much, xenia, for taking the time to be here today and for sharing all that inner wisdom and all the work we have to do to connect with the true us. Thanks a lot, by the way.
Speaker 2:It's such a pleasure, desi. Thank you so much, and yes, it might sound like a lot to do, but the important part is that once we become aware and we take control, that means we have control and not others. First of all, not our patterns or substances, but also not our parents or people we adopted limiting beliefs from and, of course, in the bigger picture, in our daily lives today not someone outside of us like, I want to say, the banking system or big pharma or the food industry or the government. We feel inclined to accuse, right and blame. But once we understand how we function and we take responsibility and start their journey of awareness above everything, and then, of course, healing. Healing comes, then it means that the outside factors don't have as much power. So, yes, there is a lot to do, but it's time to claim our power back.