What if the path you've been forced to walk isn't the one that leads to your true happiness? Join us on the Self-Care Society podcast as Isabelle challenges the pressures of societal and familial expectations, urging us to carve out a life that genuinely aligns with our desires. Isabel opens up about the uncertain future of our project, sharing updates on funding and upcoming self-care groups, before diving into a heartfelt discussion about navigating imposed life paths.
Through personal anecdotes, Isabelle illustrates how early labels and perceptions can shape our identities and choices, often leading us away from our true selves. Reflect on your own aspirations as Isabelle draws parallels to common life scenarios, whether it’s the pressure to follow a traditional timeline or the push to prioritize career achievements. This episode is a call to courage, self-awareness, and the pursuit of authenticity, inviting you to break free from the predetermined paths that don't serve your true happiness.
What if the path you've been forced to walk isn't the one that leads to your true happiness? Join us on the Self-Care Society podcast as Isabelle challenges the pressures of societal and familial expectations, urging us to carve out a life that genuinely aligns with our desires. Isabel opens up about the uncertain future of our project, sharing updates on funding and upcoming self-care groups, before diving into a heartfelt discussion about navigating imposed life paths.
Through personal anecdotes, Isabelle illustrates how early labels and perceptions can shape our identities and choices, often leading us away from our true selves. Reflect on your own aspirations as Isabelle draws parallels to common life scenarios, whether it’s the pressure to follow a traditional timeline or the push to prioritize career achievements. This episode is a call to courage, self-awareness, and the pursuit of authenticity, inviting you to break free from the predetermined paths that don't serve your true happiness.
Speaker 1:
Welcome to the Self-Care Society podcast with your hosts Celia Williamson, ashley Kuchar, louie Guardiola and Keri Shaw, a podcast devoted to those whose job it is to help others get or remain mentally, physically and emotionally healthy, but who also need to take care of themselves. And how we're going to do this? By first showing you the filtered, pretty version of success, and then the real struggles, real work and raw grit it took to get there, how they took care of themselves and also achieved their goals while doing it Together.
Speaker 2:
We will work with you to improve and maintain your internal health and growth while helping you achieve your external goals and your next professional achievement in life, and we're excited to show you how to follow your own individual and unique path and achieve the dreams you have, while taking good care of yourself.
Speaker 2:
So let's get started. Hello and welcome to the self-care podcast. My name is Isabel Matosian and I will be your host today. Before we get started with today's podcast, I want to explain a little bit about the current trajectory of this project. At this moment, we do not have funding secured for another year. This means that we will be able to continue our project in a limited capacity for the next month, but moving forward. We'll only have one episode planned after today's and then we'll have four self-care groups in July to help with the transition. So we'll have one group per week After that. The current expectation is that our project will end unless or until additional funding is obtained. So I just wanted to make sure I say that in the podcast to keep everyone up to date as well as we're able to. Our online community and podcast will remain accessible for July. So if you are a member of this project and you would like a free self-care journal to be mailed to you at no cost to you, of course please send me an email and I'll ship it right to your home. All right, so that was the update time. Now for the podcast time.
Speaker 2:
Today we'll talk about how we carve out the life that we want for ourselves. I think sometimes in life we get pushed or pulled down certain paths and we don't get as much say as we might like. It's like the common movie trope where the son feels forced to take over his family business and then he falls in love with a free-spirited girl from a small town and suddenly realizes that he wants to be a Christmas tree farmer. Okay so maybe it's not a common trope, but I've certainly seen it a lot. And even if it isn't a family business versus Christmas tree situation, there are certainly parallels. You grow up in a family where they follow a very specific timeline of college and then engagement, then marriage, then kids, then domestic life until they die. It's not a bad life, but what if you grow up in that family while not having any intention or aspirations of having a family at a young age? Then all of a sudden, you're a black sheep or an outlier. It could be the opposite. Your family is career-driven and prioritizes pursuing degree after degree and big time-consuming careers, when all you really want is to slow down and smell a rose or something. Whatever the combination of events or circumstances may be, it can be hard to break away or do something different than the people around you. Sometimes it can seem impossible. How could you possibly have one life when no one else around you has followed that same course? Let's not underestimate the power of perception. How are you perceived by others, or how you perceive others, can impact every choice you make, if you let it at least.
Speaker 2:
I grew up an incredibly shy kid. I couldn't even order my own food at a restaurant. No kidding. My little sister had to order my macaroni and chocolate milk for me when we were little. As a result, I was labeled the introvert of the family and she was an extrovert. No wiggle room, it's just how we were identified and we accepted it, and that followed me forever. I was shy and sweet and that was my identity.
Speaker 2:
There was a time that my entire family was driving somewhere together all eight of us. I had my headphones in and couldn't hear, and at one point I looked up and realized we were heading home. So I asked why, and everybody was so shocked to see that I was in the car. No one knew I was there, even though I was seated between two of my siblings, who were also not paying attention to the argument around us. From that day on I was quiet, so it became my thing to be shy and sweet and quiet.
Speaker 2:
In middle school I auditioned for a solo in choir. Standing in front of that room I felt overwhelmed and I began to cry, and from that point I was shy and sweet and quiet and anxious. So throughout high school I knew who I was and didn't try to stray too much, because why even bother? But then eventually I found the things that showed my true colors, the things that revealed who I was without the opinions or labels from others. I took up a sport that I was good at and gave me confidence, and suddenly I had a community where I was a leader and my voice was heard and respected. Then I discovered that I was capable of talking in front of groups of people, and that developed into a genuine love for public speaking and presenting.
Speaker 2:
I learned as an adult that I love breweries and coffee shops, but I'm not a huge fan of bars or clubs. So after the usual period of being in college and trying it all out, I realized that there is a special community out there when you pursue the things that you love. Through coffee shops and breweries I found more opportunities to connect with local artists or musicians. Eventually I realized that I'm not always shy, but sometimes I need my space. I'm not always sweet, but sometimes I need my space. I'm not always sweet, but I try to be kind. I'm not always quiet, but I like to listen. I'm not always anxious, but I do like to have a plan.
Speaker 2:
Our identities are complicated. We aren't just one thing or another. We're a beautiful mosaic of every experience we've had and every feeling we felt about those experiences. We're complicated and compelling and need space to continue growing the web of who we are. It's tangled and can be a little messy, and probably no one other than a multi-dimensional mathematician would be able to map it out for us, than a multi-dimensional mathematician would be able to map it out for us. Moving past the perceptions that others hold of us allows us to be all of that and more. We are everything that other people think of us to some extent, but we have to put in the work to look within and recognize which parts of us are the most authentic and bring us the most fulfillment and joy. And then we have to put in the work to be ourselves with confidence.
Speaker 2:
Carve out the space in your home for your collection of weird mugs if that brings you joy, or make a corner of your home into your painter's studio if you enjoy doing that for fun or professionally, whatever you prefer. Rent an apartment and never buy a home if you like having people around you in that environment. Anything that makes you who you are deserves a space in your life and be unapologetic about it. Don't let people judge the clutter of your weird mugs or that you don't want to have your own home. Not everyone has to.
Speaker 2:
I have siblings in all walks of life. They're all incredibly different and they all find a way to be really bold in their identities, which I took a little longer to get to. Some of them enjoy attending protests and being very involved politically. Some of them love coffee shops, like me, and try to find the best ones in any city. They visit coffee shops, like me, and try to find the best ones in any city they visit. My big brother started a business as a handyman because he just loves talking to people. He studied philosophy in college and talking to him is like talking to a book. That just has new levels of wisdom.
