Have you ever found yourself inexplicably hindered on the road to your dreams, almost as if you were the one putting up the roadblocks? I'm Mariana, your guide through the murky waters of self-sabotage, and in today's soul-stirring episode, we venture deep into the heart of why we often become our own worst enemies. I'm laying bare my battles with financial self-sabotage, offering a mirror to your own struggles and showing you that these patterns, born from our pasts and fears, can be broken.
We're more than just our mistakes, and this conversation shines a light on weapons of personal empowerment like journaling, positive affirmations, and the delicate art of seeking validation without becoming dependent on it. As your fellow traveler on this journey, I recount the peaks and valleys of my path, from the anxiety of book writing to the triumph of overcoming imposter syndrome. It's about acknowledging our progress, practicing self-compassion, and understanding that sometimes, 'done' is better than 'perfect' to circumvent the paralysis of perfectionism.
To end on an inspiring note, we examine how stepping out of our comfortable spaces can lead to profound growth. I share my leap into emceeing a summit, integrating running into my life, and the role of mentors in achieving a harmonious work-life balance. It's a call to arms for all of us, especially the mothers and aspiring entrepreneurs, to push past the fears and limiting beliefs that hold us back. So join me, and let's embrace the courage to heal, grow, and achieve what once seemed impossible.
Website: https://mamionamission.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mamionamissionpodcast
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mamionamission/
Have you ever found yourself inexplicably hindered on the road to your dreams, almost as if you were the one putting up the roadblocks? I'm Mariana, your guide through the murky waters of self-sabotage, and in today's soul-stirring episode, we venture deep into the heart of why we often become our own worst enemies. I'm laying bare my battles with financial self-sabotage, offering a mirror to your own struggles and showing you that these patterns, born from our pasts and fears, can be broken.
We're more than just our mistakes, and this conversation shines a light on weapons of personal empowerment like journaling, positive affirmations, and the delicate art of seeking validation without becoming dependent on it. As your fellow traveler on this journey, I recount the peaks and valleys of my path, from the anxiety of book writing to the triumph of overcoming imposter syndrome. It's about acknowledging our progress, practicing self-compassion, and understanding that sometimes, 'done' is better than 'perfect' to circumvent the paralysis of perfectionism.
To end on an inspiring note, we examine how stepping out of our comfortable spaces can lead to profound growth. I share my leap into emceeing a summit, integrating running into my life, and the role of mentors in achieving a harmonious work-life balance. It's a call to arms for all of us, especially the mothers and aspiring entrepreneurs, to push past the fears and limiting beliefs that hold us back. So join me, and let's embrace the courage to heal, grow, and achieve what once seemed impossible.
Website: https://mamionamission.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mamionamissionpodcast
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mamionamission/
Hey, comadre, I wanna ask you a quick question, or questions rather. Have you ever found yourself holding back from pursuing your dreams or taking that next step because of fear, self-doubt or the need for external validation? Do you sometimes feel like you're your own biggest obstacle to success, without fully understanding why? Well, you're not alone. So join me today as we explore the topic of self-sabotage and look into 10 common reasons why we women, including Latina women, may engage in behaviors that hinder their growth and well-being. So grab your cafecito or your favorite drink or your concha, whatever it is, and let's talk. The Mami On A Mission Podcast, episode 1. Mami On A Mission Podcast Hello, hello, and welcome to the Mami On A Mission Podcast, where empowerment meets inspiration. I'm your host, mariana, a life coach and author, on a mission to help Latina women, and all women, to reach their impossible goals, one dream at a time. Join me on this incredible adventure as we dive into compelling subjects that will uplift, motivate and ignite your passion. Get ready to be inspired, empowered and never give up on your dreams. This is the podcast where we turn dreams into unstoppable missions. Are you ready? Let's go. Mami On A Mission Podcast Hola, hola, comadre, and welcome back to another episode of Mami On A Mission Podcast, the podcast that empowers women, especially Latina women, to reach their impossible goals, one dream at a time.
Speaker 1:I'm your host, mariana, and I just wanna say welcome for tuning in today and just sitting here with me this morning. I've been MIA for the last three weeks because we just recently celebrated my youngest daughter's quinceañera and, oh my God, so I needed to take a break. Y'all I really, really did, because trying to juggle everything was becoming overwhelming. So a lot of you Hispanic mamas probably know that if you've ever had a quinceañera and throwing one for your daughter, you know that it takes a lot of work. It's tedious work, but so well worth it just to see my daughter just dancing with her dad and just seeing everybody gather together and celebrating her into this new season in her life of sprouting from a little girl into a young lady and then into a full woman, and it was just so much fun. So thank you for listening to the previous podcast episode. So I'm glad that I had enough out there for you to just kind of like sit back and then just revisit some of the old ones that I have.
Speaker 1:But listen, I wanted to talk about this topic of self-sabotage, and the reason why I wanted to bring it up is because number one and I'm gonna be honest, because we're comodas right, and I suffer from self-sabotage not suffer I don't wanna use a word, suffer but I am known to have self-sabotaging tendencies. For me it started, I guess, as a young kid. I'm not sure really where it stemmed from, but I know that it was heightened during my second marriage, once everything was great and everything was like put together and running well. All of a sudden, I felt the need to kind of ruin all of that, and that's crazy, right, that sounds crazy. One of the areas that I am really working through right now is financial self-sabotage, and what I mean by that is that I have a tendency.
Speaker 1:For years and years, I did not have credit cards. I did not because I put myself in a financial bind. I had more credit cards than I could manage and I ended up having to file for bankruptcy, and so it took quite a while I think it took like seven years before it actually came off, my credit report and my credit score was able to go back up, and then I learned how to live without credit cards. I learned how to live within my means. And yet, years later, once my credit was repaired, once I was re-establishing my credit, and once I got things where it looked good, boom. What do I do? The minute I was able to get credit cards again, I got them and I did very, very well on paying them back, but and my credit score was going up. However, it was causing a lot of stress because I was not managing my money well, like. I took out personal loans in order to pay off those credit cards and just have one payment, and what did I do? I ended up charging them back up and then I had another personal loan. So now I've got two personal loans and then my credit cards go back up again, and I couldn't understand why. That's something that I'm currently working through. I'm trying to search for that reason, but it is something that I am going to be honest, that I'm working through and I want to be able, because that is one of my goals.
Speaker 1:This episode is all about achieving your impossible goals, and here's the thing this is not an impossible goal, not the getting myself financially in a good position again, but rather the impossible goal for me is finding that route, finding the reason why, and so I had been thinking about this for quite some time. So I said well, you know what? Maybe I'm not the only one, maybe there's somebody out there, maybe I have a grandmother out there that's really struggling with the same thing, and so I wanted to talk about that. So there is a definition on self-sabotage, and self-sabotage is when individuals undermine their success through behaviors like procrastination and negative self-talk. It stems from beliefs, past experiences or lack of confidence, leading to missed opportunities and frustrations. When I read that definition, I was like wow, a lot of that sounds like the old me, but yet, at the same time, a lot of it still sounds just like me today. Because being in this field of life coaching, being in the field of an entrepreneur, being in the field as a self-published author, it's a lot. It's a lot and I do.
Speaker 1:I sometimes feel like I'm either failing or I get frustrated, or I feel like, should I really be doing this? Like I started to question myself and I'm pretty sure that perhaps you are too right. Like maybe you get paralyzed of some sort, right? So one of the things that says that is a sign of self-sabotage is fear of failure. So one of the key reasons why women sabotage their own success is the fear of failure. The fear can paralyze us right, preventing us from taking risks and pursuing our dreams. For example, imagine you a Latina woman who wants to apply for a promotion Maybe this is you right At work, but you hesitate due to fear of not meeting expectations. So what's the solution? Encourage reframing failure as a learning opportunity and taking calculated risk to achieve growth and success.
Speaker 1:Now, that probably sounds easier said than done, right, but when I meet with women, when they have come into my office and they are applying or they're renegotiating their salaries or they're asking for a promotion, I have them write down what have been some things that you have been able to accomplish this year. Like if you're coming to me for a promotion, why should I give you a promotion and start listing some things? It doesn't matter what those things are. I want you to list them and I want you to ask yourself what was successful about the things that you actually did, that you could possibly do in this promotion. Like what are those things that you were able to achieve that you weren't even thinking about? Like you were just doing these things right? Because a lot of times, what happens is we start to stop and we overanalyze things. So therefore, when we are trying to come up and ask for promotion, we all of a sudden freeze, we become paralyzed, right. But yet when you're actually doing the things, without having to discuss it with anybody, we're successful.
Speaker 1:We have to have that same approach when we're asking for something or where we're trying to pursue something and that's exactly what I am doing right now is I am working? Yes, I fear failing at this industry. I look at the stats all the time of how many listeners are listening to this podcast. I look at what sales are coming in from my book, if I'm getting any clients or anything, and I look at that and yes, right now the numbers are low, but that's okay. That's okay Because, to me, if I have just one person listening, if I have one person purchasing my book, or if I have one person that decides you know what I wanna make a change in my life, that I need help, then I know that my message is going out. So we can't allow for fear to paralyze us for moving forward. We really need to hone in on our strengths and the things that we have been able to accomplish and let's start promoting ourselves for that right.
Speaker 1:Another point is low self-esteem, so that's another common reason for self-sabotage. When we doubt our own abilities or our worth, we can fall into a pattern of procrastination or self-criticism. So maybe you're the one that believes that you're not smart enough to start your own business, or maybe you're not smart enough to pursue whatever that promotion is that you're asking for. But the solution here is to work on building self-confidence through positive affirmations and seeking support for mentors, and that is one of the things that I do and that I continue to do, because I know that by myself I can do it.
Speaker 1:I am a person, I am a procrastinator. Again, self-sabotage is me. I'm just being honest and that is something like I said that I'm working through, but I am known to be a procrastinator and I criticize my own self all the time. So, yeah, I tell people all the time yeah, you may see me and I may look all well put together and everything, or that I'm walking with confidence and I'm this or I'm that. Right, that's what, that's the aura I guess I give off and that's what people see.
Speaker 1:But deep down inside I struggle, lamiga. I struggle with procrastination, like I have to set goals because if not, I'm gonna push it to the side. And then when I do something, especially like right now that I'm marketing, I had to get off of social media for just a little bit, because the I mean just looking at what other people are doing. I got in my own head about that. But this time I'm coming as myself. I'm gonna come as me. I'm going to come not as someone who is always has to talk professionally, because you know what. We're amigas here, and if I'm talking to my amiga, if I'm talking to my best friend right now, we know how we talk to each other, right, I don't have to pretend to be something, that I'm not, not, that I am not a professional person, because I can be and I will when the setting is right. But if I'm talking to my amiga, I don't need to be. I can just talk straight up with you, right, and that's what we're here for. We're here to just lay it all out on the table and let's just, let's just talk, let's just talk. And so I am that person that I seek people that can take me to the next level.
Speaker 1:I am someone that looks for positive affirmations, words of affirmations, and in fact, I even created a journal. So if you've never seen it or if you're new to journaling, I have a beginner's journal on Amazon. It's one that I use, so if you look up, I'll put the link in the show notes so that you can go directly to it. But it really is something as a tool, as a guide, in order to help you put things into perspective. Like, how are you feeling, what is your mood, what are three things that you're grateful for, what are words of affirmations that you can use? So if you're struggling with something, then you can write down some words of affirmations. It's got so that you can do a journal entry. Maybe you wanna write some things down. It's got to do tasks, what's priority for you? And I created this because, like I said, I am someone that has to have goals and then I have to go back and make sure that I'm accomplishing those goals, because if I don't, girl, I'll just sit on it. I'll just sit on it and I won't move forward, and that's not the place that I wanna be, especially when I'm trying to work this business. And maybe that's you too. Maybe you're someone that's just really, really struggling and you put things off because maybe one out of frustration. Number two, because everything seems so overwhelming to you that you're just like I don't wanna do this right now, and so you put it to the side. And so it really takes writing things down and seeking someone who has been where you're wanting to be and ask them for advice, like how did you do this? What did you do?
Speaker 1:Another point is imposter syndrome. Oh my God, I think so many of us suffer from that. A lot of us suffer from imposter syndrome, where we doubt our accomplishments and fear being exposed as frauds. And what do I mean by that? It means that we can undermine our own work and potential. We feel like we're not good enough, or that we're not doing enough, or that people are gonna see right through us, or they're gonna think that we're fake, or they're gonna think that, oh, it was pure luck how she was able to accomplish some things right. But we need to acknowledge our achievements. Like I said before, we need to acknowledge our achievements and seek feedback for validation and focus on continuous growth. So have somebody look at the things that you're doing right and find someone that will say, wow, you did a really great job. And talk to them about what processes did you use in order to accomplish the goal that you accomplished and I think for a lot of us, that's what really really gets us right Is that imposter syndrome?
Speaker 1:Is that fear of being exposed as fakes, as someone, that who can't accomplish anything? And I think for me, that's one of the things that I have really struggled with, also because I remember, as I was writing my book, I was like man, here I am trying to write this book, I'm not even a writer or I'm not gonna be an author. Like who's gonna read my book? Like no way, right. And that was just me telling myself this, because I was scared, afraid of what others were going to say or that perhaps it wasn't gonna happen. But you know what, amiga, it did.
Speaker 1:I was able to write that book and I had a wonderful coach who just really truly encouraged me and told me that sometimes I was going to have to take breaks and I was able to create an outline. She held me accountable, so I always had to give her feedback and I was able to talk to her about where I was struggling. And there were times that I would just walk away from my bed. There were times that I wanted to walk away completely and put it on the back burner. But I knew that I had set out a goal for myself and that this was something that I wanted to do. And guess what? In hearts of hearts, I am a writer. I've always been a writer. I've always been a journal entry writer. That was something that I did, and that's one of the ways that I was able to cope with a lot of the things that I was going through.
Speaker 1:You don't have to be someone that writes articles or a news reporter. You are a writer because you like to write, not because you're perfect at it, but because you do it, and that there makes you a writer. Perfectionism is another trap that leads us to self-sabotage. We're always striving for perfection and we set unrealistic expectations and then we risk burnout. So instead we should prioritize progress over perfection, practice self-compassion and self-set realistic goals.
Speaker 1:I think for a lot of people and I don't want to say that I'm a perfectionist, but I do revisit a lot of things because I want to make sure that it looks right, and I think I waste a lot of time doing that but I have seen people who are true perfectionists. I don't see a mistake or an error in something, but they will find something wrong and then they go back and they rework it, and then they go back and rework that. It's just over analyzing and overthinking about what you're presenting. And sometimes what that does is it just causes us to continuously work through that, working through projects and never finishing. So it's like you never, ever, it never, ever looks right to you. And that can be dangerous sometimes, because you're trying way too hard and you could probably already have a product out there but it's never going to come out, because you're never going to be good, You're never going to feel like it's ever good enough, like there's always going to be something wrong with that.
Speaker 1:And we need to sometimes just say you know what, forget this, I'm just going to present this just as it is and let go of that fear of thinking that it's not perfect. Find yourself some grace and set some realistic goals. Like don't give yourself too many goals and then not be able to meet them, because if you do that then you're never going to accomplish the goals because you've got way too many. And remember to celebrate those small wins. A lot of times that helps a lot, because we've accomplished the small things and all of those small pieces are going to lead up to that bigger thing. So we need to be very, very careful with that Seeking validation all the time. That right there is a big one, because we may prioritize external expectations over our own needs and goals. So we need to be self aware, identify our personal values and prioritize self validation and authenticity.
Speaker 1:That is huge for me because I am someone that's always seeking validation. I truly have struggled with that and I think for me that one stemmed from growing up with my dad. Like I always wanted to please my dad, I wanted everything to look good and, as I mentioned in my book, you know my dad was an abusive person. He was. He treated my twin sister and I very differently at times, like for him I was the smart one and my sister was not, and I could remember seeing how that would, what pain that would cause my sister. And so for me, I always wanted to make sure that everything was done right, that I was doing everything that I could so that I could take the focus off my sister and put it back on me. So I always wanted to do things good to the point.
Speaker 1:Where it got me was that I was always seeking validation. I wanted to make sure that someone was always telling me what a good job I did or whatever anybody else thought maybe that's what I should do. For instance, if I wanted to start my own business, I was waiting for somebody else to validate what I was already thinking. So if I wanted to start this business, then I would be like what do you think about me starting this business? And then you'd find somebody oh no, I don't think that's a high risk, or maybe you should in, or maybe it's not a good time. And look at the economy and look at how high who's going to invest in your business and who's going to want to pay for a life coach. And if I would have listened to those voices, I would have never gone out and do this, I would not be out having a life coaching business and I would not have written my book or I wouldn't have helped as many people as I have helped, because I would have allowed for someone else to tell me when I should or shouldn't do something. And yeah, perhaps the economy is not good because I don't have a lot of clients coming in right now and I get that. But you know what? There's other ways, and I can use this platform as a way to coach you Right? I'm here today telling you that if you are suffering from self-sabotage, you don't need to, that you can work through that process and it's doable and it's possible.
Speaker 1:You sometimes fear success and the changes that come with success can be overwhelming, leading to self-sabotage to maintain comfort zones. So I will say this you know, I am scared out of my wits and because I am about to go to Phoenix, arizona, and I am going to be an emcee at the book publishing summit event out in Phoenix in not next, not this weekend, but the following weekend. And I am. I am scared because that's a new step into what I'm doing right and, yeah, when it comes to writing my book or when it comes to doing anything, I'm, yeah, I work through fear, but I have to overcome that. I have to have vision boards, I have to write down my goals and I have to ask myself what is it that I'm afraid of? And what's the fear? The fear that nobody's going to listen to me, the fear that I'm going to do a bad job, the fear that I'm a nobody amongst all these people that I'm going to be talking in front of. Well, guess what? I can't allow for that to stop me. So what did I do? I went ahead and said, yes, I will be the emcee. Yes, I will buy my ticket and fly out to Phoenix Arizona. Yes, I am going to make this commitment, as scared as I am, as scared as I am, I'm going to do it. I'm going to go out there and I'm going to do it. And what I'm going to learn from that is ways to get better, because I want to demonstrate to myself not to anybody else, to myself that anything is possible. And I want you to be able to do the same thing. I want you to be able to do things even if it's scary, even if you're afraid. Go out and do it, because you can, because you're able to. You've got the tools that you need in order to do that.
Speaker 1:Don't let cultural and societal expectations be a cause of self-sabotage. We have to challenge those limiting beliefs, we have to seek mentors, we have to advocate for ourselves and we have to learn how to overcome barriers. See, that's one of the things that get us right is those limiting beliefs, those beliefs that have been told to us time and time again that because we're Latinas, or because we're supposed to be at home, or that women aren't smart enough because I've heard that before too or that we can't be moms and entrepreneurs. That's bull. That's bull Because we can, and there are so many women that are doing it. There are so many women there.
Speaker 1:Is it going to be tiring? Absolutely, but is it going to be worth it? I don't know. That depends on you. I know that things that I'm doing is worth it, but I also have to find balance in my life in order to be able to do those things, because if I don't find the balance to do it, if I don't find the balance to be a mom, if I don't find the balance to be a wife, and if I don't find the balance to be an employee and then also to be a business owner, if I don't find the balance to do that. So I have to prioritize things and I have to set small goals in order to accomplish those things. If not, I'm going to burn out. I'm going to burn out, and that's one of the things that we don't want to do.
Speaker 1:And ask for help. Oh my God, asking for help is so hard for us, mojethes. It really, really is, because we feel like we're going to burden somebody if we ask for help. We feel like we're going to interfere or inconvenience somebody because we're asking for help, but we'll never know unless we ask right, and the answer is always going to be no unless we ask. So we have to overcome that barrier of asking for help. Overcome the barrier because we don't have the right finances. We don't have to be everything, although at first it's going to seem like we're doing everything, but we don't have to be everything for everybody. We really don't, and we need to learn how to set those boundaries for ourselves, and that's something that a lot of us don't know. How to do is set those boundaries. But we need to put those in place because if not, we're going to drive ourselves crazy.
Speaker 1:Past traumas and negative experiences can also contribute to self-sabotage as a coping mechanism. We have to address unresolved trauma, practice self-compassion and develop healthy coping strategies. So I remember going through this. You know overcoming a past trauma. Sometimes it still seeps in. But because I have been working through this, I can recognize this. I'm self-aware, especially through the abuse, through the lies that were told to me while I was married to this person, through his drug addiction through all of those things, all of that stuff that caused me pain, caused me suffering, traumatized me not being trusting of people, thinking that people always had a hidden agenda for why they will extend help. That was something that was really, really hard for me. So I had to learn how to address those things.
Speaker 1:Maybe, perhaps, if I came across somebody and I did a favor for them and then they did a favor for me, and then it would be just like they would throw that in my face, then I had to say you know what I was doing this out of the kindness of my heart. I didn't ask for you to pay me back the favor. I really didn't. I was just wanting to truly help you and do something for you. But if you're going to throw what you're doing in my face, then I don't need it. I don't want it. Don't worry about it, because I never want to live with the words that he used to say, and that was los favorables nunca se pagan. You can never pay back a favor. If I'm going to give something, I'm going to give it out of my heart, and if I come across somebody that doesn't have that same mentality, then I don't want to have anything to do with it. I'm going to help, no matter what. I don't ask for anything back in return, and so I have to forgive myself when I have allowed myself to fall into that trap again. So I have to forgive myself and say, okay, now I know where this person is coming from, and then let it go, cut all ties and just be like I'm glad I was able to help, I'm glad you were able to get the help you needed, and that's all we have to do from here on now. And then also learning how to cope with things in a healthy way, because there were times that I would just oh my God depression. Throw myself in my room and not anyone want to come out. I'd be like a hermit and I can't do that to myself.
Speaker 1:Walking and running is something that I do. Right now, it's been more walking than running. Now that I have been able to lose some weight, it's getting a lot easier for me to start incorporating some running into that. But I know that when I'm stressed or when that I'm overwhelmed, I had the tendency to snack a lot or eat a lot, so I would eat by emotion. I was an emotional eater and that's not good. So now what I've done is I make sure that I take a walk, I make sure that I go out and I start walking and start thinking out loud of some things that I need to work on, things that I need to do, in order for me to just kind of like release all that tension. Because if not, it can be, it can be crazy, y'all. It can be crazy.
Speaker 1:Lack of self-awareness is another factor. Taking self-awareness through mindfulness practices and seeking feedback can help break harmful patterns. Yeah, I do have to ask for feedback and my husband is the one person that I know that I can go to and get honest feedback. Sometimes I don't like to ask him because I think my husband can be so truthful, but he doesn't mean to be harmful about it, because he does point out all of the great qualities and all the good things that I'm doing. But he will point out some things that I need to work on and I do the same for him, so it's not just one-sided. We both do that. My husband is my COO of Mommy on a Mission. He is the one that right now looks at all my marketing stuff and he has this way of seeing things that I don't see Like I can look at something that I created and made and to me it looks fabulous and I will show it to my friends and I will share it with other people. And here's what I found out A lot of times people are not honest with their feedback.
Speaker 1:They'll be like, oh yeah, it looks great. No, I don't see anything wrong with that, and although it does make me feel good, but it's not helpful when you've got somebody else, like my husband, who'll be like oh no, it doesn't look centered and I can't maybe I'm not, I can't see the wording on that or I can't see this and he's giving me more feedback than those that I was trusting to give me feedback. And it's like y'all, my husband saw all these things. Oh well, we saw it too, but we didn't think it was a big deal. No, I need that feedback. If I'm asking you for feedback, I'm asking for honesty, and there's a way to give feedback without being hurtful, and there's ways to do that. You ask questions, you give what you're looking at, your perspective, and then respect what someone especially if you're asking for it respect their feedback. That means you always have to take their feedback, but at least acknowledge their feedback and take from it what you need, because not every feedback is going to be the right feedback. But if it's somebody that you know is coming from a good place and they don't mean any harm, then take from them what you need and that's it. That's it.
Speaker 1:So the last thing that I think triggers self sabotage is Is difficulty with change. To me, I think that's one of the biggest ones, because I know people don't like change. I Can adapt to change, but when it's all of a sudden, it paralyzes me sometimes, but I will work through it. Once I get all mad and I get a lot of my emotions out and stuff, then I'm able to work through it. But there are truly people that when Change, sudden change, happens, they Don't do well. No matter what that changes, it does it. If, whether it's good change or bad change, some people don't know how to adjust to change Very well, it's like they need time to process, they need time to really navigate through it, and I think for some, you know, change is something that Causes a lot of fear and panic because you you're facing some unknowns, you don't have direct answers right away, and so now you're like, oh, my god, I will tell you this one of the areas that I do self sabotage now that we're talking about this is is when a new opportunity comes up.
Speaker 1:So Any job that I've ever had in the past, if an opportunity for management came to play, or if I was ever offered a lead position, I Immediately would turn it down, even though I was already doing quite a bit of it. But it was the fear of not meeting expectations, it was the fear of failing. It was all of those things and I just remember because it would be like changes. So everything that we've been talking about today Reminds me of those times that when I was trying to, well, when I was offered positions and like I had this one job that was offering me more money, and they were like because I decided to leave and Honestly, I left because I was afraid of that position.
Speaker 1:So I went into another entry-level position and this Executive director members have, well, how much do we need to pay you in order for you to stay? And I was like, no, it's not about the money, but deep down inside, what it was, it was fear. It was fear. It was that fear of being seen, as you know. Oh, what was the word that we used earlier, a fraud. You know that imposter syndrome that I Was going. You know that fear of success. Once again, you know being successful and how it was others going to view me. It was going to be that I wasn't good enough mentality.
Speaker 1:So all of this is as I'm sitting here talking to you right now Reminds me of those opportunities that I let pass because I was too scared to do them. And and here I am today because I think I would have learned a lot more lessons on how to really run a business, on how to really lead a team, on how to really go out. There would have benefited me in order for me to do the thing that I'm doing today. And so God works his way into where he will throw you once again back into those Situations in order for you to learn and gain the necessary tools that you need. So if you find yourself, like me, that many Opportunities will come into play for you to be promoted, for you to be Recognized of something, and you keep closing that door because you're too afraid, then guess what? God is going to bring those things back around and he's going to have you face it, because he's got a purpose for you, and I'm having to learn that today.
Speaker 1:Today, it just hit me like today's my aha moment, because here I am today talking to you about something that I've been struggling with, and maybe you're struggling with it too, and so maybe we needed to talk about it. And if that is you and you need help with that, then reach out to me, let's talk about it. You know, this is what I want to be able to do for you. I want to be that person that can help you on your journey of self-discovery and of empowerment. I'm not here to tell you that you are empowered. I'm here to show you that you are empowered because you hold the power within you. You have all the power within you.
Speaker 1:Do not be afraid to tap into your power, do not be afraid to tap into your authority, do not be afraid to pursue your goals. Do not be afraid and do not allow yourself to be paralyzed to move forward, except change. Change is uncomfortable I know that it is, but being able to be Learning how to be comfortable, being uncomfortable is huge, and that's one of the things that I'm currently doing today is I am putting myself in Positions that are so uncomfortable that it's going to help me overcome a lot of the things that I've been having to work through. So perhaps I'm not a manager, perhaps I'm not leading people right now in the sense, in my job, but I am doing it through this platform, through my podcast, through my book, through my business and through the Engagements and the networking that I'm doing. I am being put in positions that are that are challenging me in order To get into the face where God needs me to be.
Speaker 1:I Can no longer be afraid to take chances. I can no longer be afraid of allowing for this self sabotage pattern to continue on, and neither can you Come on that, neither can you. You need to tap into your power, and I'm here to tell you that I believe in you and that I know that you have it in you and that you can do it. I know you can. God says that he did not give us a spirit of fear, and I believe that I Believe that, because time and time again, he's telling us fear not, for I am with you and I am going to trust that God is with you, that God is with me and that God is with what, with all the muhattis out there who are wanting to Seek their full potential. So I'm you got if this message Resonate it with you.
Speaker 1:If you received anything out of this message, then share it with somebody else. Don't hold this message for yourself. Share it with another Amiga, show it with, share it with your sister, with your aunt, with your co-worker whomever do that you feel needs to hear this message. Share it with them. Share it with them. Share it with them, and If you really really want help, then reach out to me. I Am on Instagram at mommy on a mission podcast. You can send me a DM, you can follow me on there or you can email me. I'll have all the links in the show notes, but reach out to me and let me know what you thought about this message.
Speaker 1:Subscribe to this episode so that you continuously will hear upcoming episodes of mommy on a mission. I've got a lineup of women that are going to be sharing with us their stories, and I can't wait To share those stories with you, but today, let's conquer self-sabotage mentality. Today, let's conquer that behavior. So I mean, I thank you so much for Having this little talk with me today, for Sitting with me and drinking your coffee. See, though, I can't wait to hear your feedback and I am looking forward to seeing how what resonated with you. So share that with me. So tune in next Saturday as we dive into more topics.
Speaker 1:On the mommy on a mission If you are hearing this message, you've listened to the entire episode and for that I want to say me gracias from the bottom of my heart. If you would like to dive deeper into today's message and would like to connect me, send the DM on Instagram at all a mommy on a mission, or Facebook at mommy on a mission. You can also find me at mommy on a missioncom. I hope you've enjoyed this new episode and if you did, it would mean the world to me If you would subscribe, share this podcast and leave me a review on Spotify and Apple podcast or wherever you listen to your podcast. Tune in next week for some more words of motivation, inspiration and encouragement on mommy on a mission.