116: 4 Common Mistakes Preventing You From Cultivating A Thriving Home Atmosphere
Apr 10, 2023Episode 116
Crystal Wagner
Do you desire to have a thriving home atmosphere but feel like you just can't quite achieve it?
I get it! I've had seasons where it seemed like no matter what I did, something just didn't feel right about our home atmosphere.
But it is possible!
After talking to many women and examining my own home, I've identified four mistakes that can trip you up. In this episode, we'll examine these four mistakes and explore how you can avoid them.
Do you desire to have a thriving home atmosphere but feel like you just can't quite achieve it?
I get it! I've had seasons where it seemed like no matter what I did, something just didn't feel right about our home atmosphere.
But it is possible!
After talking to many women and examining my own home, I've identified four mistakes that can trip you up. In this episode, we'll examine these four mistakes and explore how you can avoid them.
Welcome back to the All In A Homeschool Day podcast, where we talk about cultivating a thriving home atmosphere. And in today's episode, we're going to be talking about four common mistakes that often prevent you from cultivating that thriving atmosphere. After talking to many people and examining my own home, I've seen these common mistakes many times. So let's dive right in. the end in mind; we need to know where we're going so we can determine what we need to get there. And also to evaluate when we've achieved that vision. I want to encourage you to take some time to write out your vision of a thriving home atmosphere. Just grab a piece of paper, or your journal, whatever it is you like to dream in and take notes, and ask yourself some questions, things like, What does it look like? What does your thriving home atmosphere sound like? How do you want to feel in your home? How do you want others to feel when they visit your home? I wrote this out and had seven adjectives that describe my vision of a thriving home atmosphere. I then took each of those adjectives and expanded it into a sentence so that I could read through and quickly be reminded of what I want my atmosphere to feel like. And then I came up with a summary statement. And I have looked back on this multiple times, I have it in my journal, where I will journal out my thoughts and my prayers many days, and occasionally I'll flip back to it, read through it, and be reminded, oh, yeah, that's what I'm striving to achieve. And sometimes I can say, I am making progress, and I'm happy with where we are. And other times I read those adjectives and sentences and think, Oh, I've kind of slipped in this area, I need to step it up some. So I have that vision of where I want to be, and I know how I'm making progress towards that. Some additional resources, if you want to take this even a step further is to write out your mission statement. If you're interested, I have a guided work session to help you write your mission statement. I'll leave a link in the description for you so you can check that out. Also, the thriving life journal can help you evaluate your home atmosphere, different aspects of it, how you would write them, and where you want them to be. Plus, there are additional journaling prompts. This is a free resource. And I'll leave a link for that also. The second mistake that I often see is not having buy-in. This is not something that you can muscle your way through. You need to have your family on board. And they don't have to like all aspects of it, but they do need to be helping a little bit. I like to make it fun to pitch in, to obey, to live out our vision, and find ways to get my kids involved, talk with my spouse and tell him what is going on, what my vision is, what I'm trying to achieve. Sometimes that means I need to have him to let me know when I'm not living it out, when I need to step up my game and improve something or change something. Sometimes I will point out to him ways that he could improve what he's doing. But because we've already talked about this, we have that buy-in so we know what we're trying to achieve. Sometimes we just need those reminders that we're not actually hitting the mark. Now, the third mistake that I see is not having enough margin. You have heard me talk about this so much on the podcast; we need to have enough white space that we can live out our vision of a thriving home atmosphere. And regardless of what your vision is, if you do not have enough white space, then you are living in a place that is rushed and hurried. You don't have time to focus on what is important to you. Personally, I want to have a calm home that feels inviting, and I can't do that if I'm stressed and don't have enough margin. Even during busy seasons, I have to make choices. I'm actually pretty busy right now as I prepare for a speaking engagement and plan a graduate recognition ceremony. My oldest is graduating this year. So I've had to lower my expectations of our meals, our meal plans, and know that I'm going to drop some balls. We are having simpler meals, we are all pitching in, and I have some meals in the freezer that I've purchased from somebody that makes up meal batches that you can freeze and then just put in the crock pot. I found ways to not compromise on what's important to me, having meals together is important, having healthy meals is important, but I've had to make some choices. I'm not making all of our meals from scratch,. I'm not making all of our meals; some nights we have something pretty simple like scrambled eggs or yogurt parfaits. And that's okay. I don't have to try new recipes and be on the lookout for things like that because this is a season that I need to focus on other things. If this is one of the areas that you struggle with, I have a free email challenge that might be helpful for you. It's the Take Back Your Day Challenge. And it will walk you through evaluating your schedule and deciding what you need to do to have more whitespace. Now the final mistake that I often see happening is not managing your emotions. This goes along a little bit with not having enough margin. When I don't have enough margin, I definitely cannot manage my emotions. So I always think about that first, am I too busy, and is that keeping me stressed? When I am too busy, I also often don't make time to exercise and then I really can't manage my emotions. When I allow my emotions to control my days, my home cannot be a place of refuge. So I want to make sure that I am investing in my self care, that I am getting enough sleep, that I am getting exercise, and that I am managing my thought life so that I can be the thermostat and not respond to situations but choose how I want to respond. If this is an area that you want to work on, I have a free resource called the Thermostat Approach Toolkit. I put together resources to help you learn about your emotions, help you learn how to choose your responses, and how to manage your emotions so that they don't control you. This resource encompasses about 10 years of my learning, and how I have sought to be the thermostat. As we wrap up, I want to recap those four mistakes that often prevent us from cultivating a thriving home atmosphere. They are not having a vision, not having buy-in, not having enough margin, and not managing your emotions. So you might be asking, well, how can I avoid these common mistakes? I would encourage you to take it one step at a time. I have faced every single one of these and I will tell you from firsthand experience that you cannot tackle them all at once. Choose one which resonated the most with you. Which one do you feel you need to focus on first? And then choose one step that you could take to mitigate that mistake. Maybe you want to download the free resource that's associated with that stage. Maybe you already know what it is that you want to do, what you need to change to get past that. Another option it would be for you to join the Thriving Homes Group Coaching. During this six week group interactive experience, you will have time to slow down, to breathe and reflect. You'll find inspiration through the community and design an individualized plan of action. It will be a time for you to focus on something that you care deeply about-your family and your home atmosphere. Through assessments and journaling, discussion and reflection, you'll have an opportunity to explore three common obstacles that prevent us from cultivating a thriving home atmosphere. And as we explore these areas together you'll find encouragement and inspiration so you can create your customized action plan that will allow you to take the first baby step towards setting the tone of your home. I want to encourage you to check out this group coaching experience at triumphantlearning.com/thrivinghomes. I will have the link to that in the description also. This program will be run several times throughout the year if you don't get in on the first one. I hope that this has been helpful for you as you think about cultivating your thriving home atmosphere and what that looks like for you and what steps you want to take towards achieving that vision. Until next time, have a triumphant day
