Dancing with the Universe to Co-Create Your Desired Reality with Becky Lee

Have you ever felt your dreams slipping through your fingers the harder you try to hold onto them? This episode peels away at the paradox of manifestation, revealing how the art of releasing our grip might actually draw our aspirations closer. We venture into the law of attraction, discussing 'excess potential' and the unexpected ways in which intense focus can act as an energetic barrier to our desires. Through stories and insights, host Blaire Stanislao and guest Becky Lee guide you on how to align your actions with intentions and adopt a vibrational match to your goals, offering a fresh perspective on co-creating the life you want with a touch of grace and ease.

Join us for an empowering conversation that invites you to take charge of your energy and emotional well-being, setting the stage for not just living, but thriving on your highest timeline.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Hello, this is Blair Stanisleo, with the Happy Lion Center. Welcome to our podcast. Mystical and Infamous where we have playful and easy conversations about anything mystical, getting to the heart of all things strange and weird. Join us in a bit of magical tomfoolery, spreading the alchemy of love and light. And now we invite you to enjoy the show.

Speaker 2: 0:27

It's more of a scientific method of manifestation. It's really cool. So they speak a lot about pendulums and excess potential. And in the manifestation world, when we have this excess potential quote unquote when people say, release it and just allow it, when we have excess potential, we actually create a dam of energy and we push what we're manifesting and creating away from us. So if we're so fixated on getting something or having the dream job or relationship and we're, you know, we don't just set our intention but we're like, oh my gosh, I can't stop thinking about it, and then you start worrying about it or you start like hyper fixating on it, you're actually doing the opposite of what you want to create. And so when we speak about manifestation I think this is a lot lost in translation of the law of attraction. We need to work on our letting go. That's why it's like it's not up to you.

Speaker 2: 1:20

It's like you set your intention, you do your work, both inner work and outer work, to align with that and you become the vibrational resonance of that. So you want to be a CEO in your life, say, you want to have a successful career? Well, you're not going to walk down the street looking like you know, and you can walk down the street and sweat pads, but you're not going to be rude to people. You're not going to show up with a chip on your shoulder. You're going to show up as a successful person. You know not be so hyper, fixated on what you don't have, and you know where you're, where you're missing. It's, it's. It's a super powerful technique. You know a lot of beings on the earth think that by making a stand and fighting for what they believe in, they're going to fix the cause, when in reality that just adds more energy to that pendulum and to that cause and it gives the opposite side more power, because you're feeding to it, like you're giving it that energy to grow and create.

Speaker 1: 2:13

Yeah, it's kind of funny. You say that and I just immediately think of all different kinds of ways you can see that. I mean you can look at in politics somebody is talking and you don't like what they're talking about. Then you turn around and you start talking about them to everybody else. You're just like just feeding it exactly.

Speaker 2: 2:29

You're feeding that entity, your feet, you're creating the entity. You know, when we look at this, the you know the more spiritual side of thing, the energetic side. You're creating the entities with your thought forms. What your thought forms to go? Do you want them to go to something that you're creating or are you going to leech and leak your energy to something that you don't like? Because, as we know, where our intention goes, energy flows. So if we're, you know, all worried about.

Speaker 2: 2:54

I grew up in a house. I love my mom so much but she was a very worried person. She'd always have like plan A, B, c and D. You know, and I think that was that. You know, their parents grew up in the depression and the war and all that stuff. So that's how they you know that age group was raised. You know you plan for the worst but hope for the best. Well, why not plan for the best and then create the best you know? And if things that aren't a match to that come along, you just ride those waves and you learn from it and you keep going and creating that way.

Speaker 1: 3:25

Tell me more about this. I like the way you articulated this dam. There's something that we want, we think about it and we essentially create a dam.

Speaker 2: 3:34

So think about being in the water, like, say, you're in a pool or in the ocean and you're wanting to go get something and you start running through the water. Well, what happens is the water pushes resistance back on you. So, ultimately, if you see your energy that way and when I visualize energy, that's what I feel. So when I'm pushing for something, that's when I know I have to stop and like just center myself and like sometimes we need to be quiet. So what you do energetically is when you chase something, you repel it because it's like from a universal law perspective, it's a lack energy. You don't have it, you need it, you want it. So the universe is like well, you're obviously not an energetic match for it. So, no, you need, you need to learn some more lessons before I I serve it up to you on a silver platter.

Speaker 2: 4:17

Yeah, I'm like I'm a big analogy person when I teach and when I speak and like this is I'm a visual eyes and that's what I always see.

Speaker 2: 4:25

And I can feel it in my own self when I'm like maybe out of my center, because we all like any energetic being.

Speaker 2: 4:32

We all have moments where we may be out of center and we feel like we need to fight or, you know, push for things, and this is where it's so important just to like create a meditation practice where you can just sit and feel and become a match to that. But I know, when I first started like my journey, I didn't understand what the law of attraction meant. Well, you know, I just sit here and I, you know, I think I have a million dollars in my bank account and it's just going to appear, no, like you actually start visualizing these things and it's like what would I feel like in that moment? Well, I wouldn't feel like I have to chase it because I would feel like it just comes to me. I would feel like I do work and I do this amazing work that people appreciate, and they have no effort, you know, they don't even think about investing in themselves by working with me, you know. And then, instead of being like, oh my gosh, am I good enough? Am I you?

Speaker 1: 5:22

know, are these people going?

Speaker 2: 5:23

to work with me. It's like it's switching that mindset and it takes time. It's like tuning that dial yeah.

Speaker 1: 5:31

When was it like can you tell me about, like a chef that you remember from your experience? That was like a big aha moment.

Speaker 2: 5:38

In regards to that, A big one for me was just mindset. I used to like have this mindset. I was always very driven, but I would be very negative and cynical in my life because I you know, when you go through a lot it tends to make you cynical and it's like, oh, I used to say I can't get any worse. And I started to notice, every time I call that into existence, something worse would happen. Or like the self-fulfilling prophecy of like bad things happen in three, so you'd have two things that weren't favorable happen and then you think that and then a third really not favorable thing happens. And when I learned that it's my perception to these things and I started saying things like things are only going to get better, and my life started to shift drastically because I'd start focusing on the good things and, in turn, create more good things. Because as we think these things, we send out energetic waves. Our heart, mind, coherence sends out these waves. When you believe it and we become these magnets then for gratitude and attracting more gracious things to us and energetic like miracles to us, like I'll give you a really cool example Like it just you know, a day to day miracle, and I think people get stuck on that word miracle and they think it needs to be something huge.

Speaker 2: 6:53

I went grocery shopping on Sunday because that's what I do, you know, it's what we do in our human lives and I was with my spouse and we were at the big grocery place and he's like, no, I think I need to go to Costco and get these things instead. And usually I'd be like, why? But I'm like I'll just go with it, you can go to Costco, I don't want to go. And everything on the list that he went to Costco for was like on sale Again. It's crazy. It's like this is following your intuition and just being led and letting go. You know, if I would have fought it, we would have bought those things there and he wouldn't have had those miracles show up for him. And these are what I call the quote unquote daily miracles. And when we become excited and like, have gratitude for these things, we make room for bigger things to come in, because we're not pushing the water anymore, we're sitting back and we're letting the river or the current take us where it's leading us. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 7:47

It is hard to describe that though, because I don't know how to describe it other than I think everybody gets it, but like somebody today, after our little meditation meeting we were talking about, there was some research on autistic and ADHD people with those diagnosis and there's been some research I guess I haven't read this, but some research on putting frequencies in a room with this person, right, and then they start to kind of calm down and then they're better, because ADHD is somewhat like this, but autistic the description for that huge part of it is being able to be in tune with social cues, right. So what they saw was that the social cues were, they were being much more responsive to that. And this person was asking because she has a friend who has, who just has a child that just got diagnosed with autism, and she said but we're all living in this, you know, they're experiencing the same reality. And I said, oh no, they're not.

Speaker 2: 8:53

There's millions of different realities happening over each other at the same time and you're very aware of this because you teach the quantum theories right. It's like it's quantum entanglement. It's like now is the time that matters and I always joke with my spouse it's like when you have like a headbutt moment. It's like because we're living on different frequencies. Like there was a circumstance last week where he was speaking but I wasn't hearing him and I'm like I'm not ignoring you, I think sometimes, like our frequencies change and it's like what's being delivered is not heard and it goes vice versa.

Speaker 2: 9:23

Like we're always oscillating through and you know, instead of being sucked back down to those lower frequencies like we may have used to been, you know where somebody cuts you up in traffic and you're angry about it for a week and then you start to hyper fixate on like everything that makes you mad and how bad life sucks and work sucks. Now we're like oh well, it's what it is. I'm obviously I'm not in a great energetic match right now. If this is happening to me, how am I going to get my perspective and get into a better energetic match? So the next person actually lets me in when I put my single light on.

Speaker 1: 9:57

So funny because you say all that. It's kind of funny because this morning it snowed or I guess they were plowing this morning and my husband is a little aggravated at the guy who does where we live. And it was really interesting because I mean, I didn't know how, I don't know how to like actually put into words, but when you hear, that's like the first thing comes out of their mouth like oh, this person is doing this thing. You know, it's like oh boy, it's. It's hard to say to somebody who, who isn't ready to hear, you know, okay, well, other than I mean the only thing I can think of to say to anybody, which we need to know what to say to ourselves, but bottom line is it doesn't help you to feel that way, so you want to keep holding on to that feeling. You know Exactly.

Speaker 2: 10:41

How long are you going to let it? Because, like, our feelings are truth to us in that moment right, and it's so important to be aware, and I think it's the awareness that makes people more like. I love the word enlightened because it's like such a funny conundrum, it's like nobody's truly enlightened on this planet.

Speaker 1: 10:57

I don't know what anybody says, you're enlightened?

Speaker 2: 10:59

You're not enlightened. We're definitely not. That's ego-tracking. When you need a label, we're not there still.

Speaker 2: 11:05

But it's like, do you choose to fix it on the bat? And it's like, yeah, you're allowed to get mad at something, but let it go and move on, like I'd be grateful somebody's cleaning my snow. Like you know, I look at things that way and I might not be happy with the way they do it, but we are telepathic beings and so if we're sending negative thought forms, that person's probably going to feel them and not realize it, and then they're maybe going to do a crappier job the next time. Out of you know spite, it's like, oh, this doesn't like what I'm doing, I'm going to be spiteful.

Speaker 1: 11:34

Yeah, yeah, no, they definitely. And I think even people who don't know, like this stuff that we talk about, that they're not in tune with any of this. So I'm just going to say for listeners, anybody who's listening to this, think about a time when you didn't know anything about this. Okay, and somebody comes in the room and you can sense a big shift in the energy, like, is this positive or is this negative? He can go both ways.

Speaker 2: 11:57

Yeah, you know like it. I know for me. I used to think, oh my gosh, people don't like me. I was like super insecure and then it would show up with people not liking me or judging me in that way and it's because I'd send off that energy and be closed off. Walking to your room, you know, you get around people at parties who are like that bright, shining light and it's like you just want to be in their presence. They may not be fundamentally attractive or anything like that, but they just elude that energy. It's because they believe in themselves and they know they're awesome and not in an egotistical way.

Speaker 2: 12:27

And I love how this conversation is like coming around full circle. This comes back to those different timelines. You know that person or yourself has different versions of you on that timeline. And when I was listening to the reality Transurfing book today on my way home and he was talking about you know how, if you're afraid of something in one lifeline because there's those millions of lifelines are on something happened to you and this is like the quantum theory of entanglement right, something happened to you on that lifeline. Are you going to choose to create another lifeline in that, or are you going to be like okay, I'm awesome today, people show up in a great way. I'm going to have an effortless drive. Wherever I'm going today, I'm going to meet amazing people today. Or are you going to be like, oh, I hate them and I don't like this. It's like our choice in every moment, and when we catch ourselves in that negative talk, whether it's about ourselves or another person, we can change our course of destiny and reality in a split second by our thoughts.

Speaker 1: 13:30

I have found that, with me at least, the big, huge turning moments are, you know, because I think we all sometimes get into a habit of doing or thinking a certain way and so like it could be the negative thing, right. So you get into a habit of thinking this negative stuff, but it's the moment when you say what if? What if there was something different? And then you just entertain it for a few moments and then with I mean, the more I do it, of course, the quicker it comes, but you have to acknowledge that you're actually doing that pattern where you're kind of getting in that repeating. A lot of people call it ruminating or I forget it's another word I've heard too, but basically it just keeps replaying, right? Yeah, you have to notice that first.

Speaker 2: 14:15

Exactly, and this is like consciousness 101. It's like those subconscious things are playing in the background. And if we've been through traumas in our life where a lot of our child mind is still like it's running in the background but we're not aware of it, this is where, like hypnosis and like past life regressions or like this life regression, just tuning into it. Even acupuncture was huge for me. It released a lot of trapped energy in my nervous system. Because if we don't feel it in that moment which most of us have been taught through our lives, unfortunately to suck it up and go for a walk or, it's fine, push it under the rug, we don't learn those coping mechanisms to release it from our system, whereas the animal kingdom, they shake it off as soon as the trauma is over, it's out of their body.

Speaker 1: 15:01

Yeah, because they do allow it to be. I mean, I don't know, I guess they don't know how or it doesn't matter, they just don't, they don't push it down.

Speaker 2: 15:08

No, they shake it, If you see, like a deer or a horse, like. They shake after like and they have to lay in. They like, shake. That's actually the removing of the trauma from the nervous system and the animal.

Speaker 1: 15:19

Yeah. So I'd love to talk a little bit more about that, because of course I've had that too Like, and sometimes it gets to where it feels a little defeating sometimes, because you're like oh wow, here's this thing, I didn't know that, I was holding onto it and you know, they uncovered it and it's so obvious, it's like you can't deny it. So then you go through the process and of course it's not necessarily the most fun thing to do, but then it's like well, how many more things are in there?

Speaker 2: 15:43

And, you know, that can actually become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I see a lot of people in my community speaking about how they need to continuously heal. It's like, yeah, there's always gonna be things we need to heal from, but if we always think there's something wrong with us, we're not gonna be the best version of ourself or show up as the best version of ourself. So allow those things to come up as they come up, because once you trigger that like that energy flow of things being released, they are gonna come up. And they're gonna come up in weird, you know, non-opportuned times where you may feel this wave of emotion, where you need to cry or laugh hysterically or shake.

Speaker 2: 16:16

Somatic exercises are super powerful. You know, going for a walk, dancing, any type of creative output, like if you play music or you garden or you know bake something, or even if you like math and doing Sudoku and you're like in the now moment, that can help trigger the release of energetic blockages in our being and it's powerful, you know. But it's about showing up and being like I am, that I am and I'm perfect, whole and completed every step of my life. I showed up in these places that maybe weren't what I know now, but I showed up as I was then and the best as I could then. I think many of us can't forgive our past selves and past transactions, and that's like the biggest part is to let go of that.

Speaker 1: 17:02

Well, I too I've noticed, you know, in this kind of work, you know, essentially you have to, you have to be the observer of yourself as healed, which is similar to what we're talking about with manifesting right, like you imagine yourself in that. How does it feel? So far? But what I've heard somebody describe is actually Michael Sheridan. He said healers okay, we're gonna use words, so it's limiting, it's not really completely accurate. But healers create a space for the person being healed to feel safe and feel seen, and then what they do is they allow that person to be in that space where they can be fully themselves, fully accepted, and then, because they feel that way, then the body can naturally go back to its normal state of homeostasis, which oftentimes involves healing, right. So it's like a natural process, but it's not like the healer is doing something to you, right? They're just creating a space around which you can then get back to your alignment and then you can heal.

Speaker 2: 18:02

Yeah, we're like the bad date and we're keeping it safe in that moment and keeping the germs out quote, unquote germs so you can become the fullest version of yourselves. And, honestly, as a healer, as somebody who facilitates these things as I'm sure you know as well is like we want. I know I want to teach my clients to be able to do this themselves. If you're coming to me for four years, I'd be like, no, you need to learn this and you need to be able to do this yourself. And, yeah, if you need an energetic attunement a couple times a year, that's fine. But we're about teaching the psychology behind it, teaching the energetics behind it, and the beautiful thing about going to a healer is you become energetically calibrated to that source energy flow that comes through so you're able to tune it into it whenever you'd like to. And the only thing stopping anybody is their limiting beliefs and not setting the intention that they can, because we're all tuned into the same source.

Speaker 2: 18:59

Right we just don't realize it.

Speaker 1: 19:01

Yeah, and so that's exactly where I wanted to go with this, because you had mentioned it before. But I just want to make it really clear. It's like I mean, and actually I just realized this week, like what am I doing in my business, and so forth I realized you know what I really like teaching, because I don't want to just have one session with somebody and then they're like you know, I need you to fix this thing, or like I'm not really fixing anything. You're doing it right. But it's that learning how it feels when you go through that process of, like you said, kind of opening up, allowing the feeling to come in and then processing it, and then you release your own stuff on your own, like you can do it on your own. I think that's the real graduation, if you will. Exactly you are.

Speaker 2: 19:44

And it's beautiful because you get to a point where you can question yourself in those moments that you're triggered and you're like why am I feeling this way? Like even myself, like I still get triggered by really insignificant things sometimes and I'm like why is this bothering me? What in me is this like poking what childhood wound is still like hiding under there that I may not feel good enough? And that's the beauty. It's like when you can get past yourself, that ego facade. And not to diss the ego the ego is as important as our soul but get past that ego emotional reaction to it and go in and parent, reparent and repair that broken part of yourself. And it's not broken, it's like a fragment. You become more whole in yourself because, like you said, you come back to a homeostasis in yourself. You calm the nervous system and self soothing is so important for every living being because when we pull energy off of other people, we're not whole and complete.

Speaker 1: 20:41

Yeah, Actually, I heard I heard it described one of my healers. She described this I don't know if it's popular anymore, but I know it was popular for a while talking about energy vampires, and she approached it from an entirely different perspective than it was like the energy vampire I'm putting quotes up in the air okay, the energy vampire is not the person that comes in the room that you feel like is sucking your energy. It's that you are allowing it to go there.

Speaker 2: 21:15

And that's huge. That is the shift from victimhood to empowered, like right there, when we take ownership of our emotions, like the best thing I've ever heard is like you are not responsible for the stuff that happened to you as a child. Nobody is no child is. I never want anybody to think that. But once you're an adult, it is 100% up to you to own your stuff, like own every bit of your emotions, your reactions, and when you feel your energy being leashed by somebody else, you want to be like oh my gosh, that person's so codependent. You're such a narcissist I'm using air quotes because it's all these buzzwords. They're an energy vampire. No, you're allowing them on some level, whether it's conscious or unconscious, to take your energy because you're giving it to them. We teach people how to treat us every way. There's no ifs, ands or buts. Whether it's our children, whether it's our spouses, whether it's people at work, whether it's family relationships, we allow it.

Speaker 1: 22:08

Yeah, I used to tell my kids I wasn't into really all of this quite yet, but I do remember and I always kind of thought this when I was younger. So I never had a problem with a bully, I never had a problem with. I mean, I have had trouble with some co-workers sometimes but again it was like going back to this stuff, like okay, what does this mean? What do I need to learn from them? How do I work with them? But the idea of if we just take a generic idea of like a bully I used to tell my children, okay, the reason they're acting like that is, first off, they've been taught that that's okay, right, and then also there's a sense of lack somewhere, like they're feeling there's something missing Nine times out of 10, it's a feeling of love, right. So if you turn around with love, boom, that bully is gone, like the person is still there, but the bullying is totally evaporated because you met him.

Speaker 2: 22:59

And that's powerful. I love that you said that, because I do the same with my kids. Like if they come home and somebody's being mean to them at school. And I'm like to my son he's 10, so he's still sort of in the thick of it. My daughter's almost 16, so she understands now how to manage that type of thing. But it's like if somebody's being mean to you and showing up, they're learning it from home. So maybe they're being treated like this at home nine times out of 10, a parent, a sibling, somebody's treating them like this or teaching them that. So I said have compassion, send them love. You don't have to be like, you don't have to say anything, but if we energetically cut that tie and send love to them like, that will start to heal them from the inside and we can do that every relationship in our life.

Speaker 1: 23:39

Right all the way till the day you die. Yeah, and how better is our life.

Speaker 2: 23:44

Yeah, that's that unconditional love. And it's tough sometimes when you get, you know, notice. I'll say to anybody listening today, when you feel yourself getting bitter or resentful, this is the key time to start. First of all, send yourself love. Find out why you're feeling bitter and send that person love. And you don't have to send it to them like verbally, just energetically. Think of them and I know sometimes it's really hard to think of somebody who's upset you, you know. But it's like okay, I have peace with this and I send back everything that's come my way and I send it with an abundance of unconditional love and you'll feel like a weight left off your shoulder because you're not carrying that heavy backpack of emotion around anymore. It's like, oh, I feel free.

Speaker 1: 24:24

Yeah, that's a really good description of how it feels to when you feel the energy shift. I know I had an interaction with somebody. I was selling a wash machine and dryer and it was. It was so funny because I'm all in the thick of this stuff and I have this interaction and it was like really horrible.

Speaker 1: 24:40

And then I realized it's you know it is. It's something within me, has nothing to do with whoever this other person is, and it was this like it was kind of weird because I didn't think I'd done anything, but yet this person came at me like defensive, you know, like really defensive, right away and I was like, well, what is that about? And so I just tried to interact, but then it just got worse and it really stirred up a lot of stuff in me. And anyways, I did the energy work around it and it was like instantaneously I knew once I had done it, it's like I got the realization and I was like, oh, it's done, I don't have to worry about that person, I don't never get to interact with that person, I didn't have to block them, I don't have to do anything, it's just done.

Speaker 2: 25:19

That's amazing and that's powerful. Like you know, the community that I run is like 700 and some thousand people now and it's growing daily like a group of 10,000 people in the last two days. And I get the odd message of somebody whose post has been auto-declined and because they don't go in and look at it, they think it's me sitting there all day like being in need and declining their posts and I'll get like the most scathing messages and they usually go into my junk. So I don't actually like I'll read them but I don't respond. It's like the pendulum If I feed it the gasoline for the fire, I can tell like there's certain ones I will respond to, but if they're scathing, I just know like gone and hide. It's like one strike. I don't have time for this in my life anymore. I'm not 16, you know I don't need your approval. That's like the biggest thing.

Speaker 2: 26:03

And it's like I had this one person do this to me yesterday and it was like I'm laughing at the message and like and I'm sending this person love and I'm like how can something online that's not actually real trigger a part of you so much that you first of all message the person, say a bunch of mean stuff and then message my business account, find it, send a bunch of mean stuff and then comment the same comment on like 50 posts on my business page. It was like this long and it was like you owe me an explanation for this and I'm like your self importance is like too much. We need to calm down, as Taylor Swift says. I was just watching a Taylor Swift documentary. It's like we need to calm down. Like calm down, yeah, but I'm like don't laugh it off because we get so sucked in.

Speaker 2: 26:46

And this goes back to the pendulums and the energy vortexes. It's like don't let yourself get sucked into other people's negativity. It's like you don't owe anybody an explanation ever, you know, unless you feel you need to, as long as you feel okay with how things have transpired and you haven't outgoingly hurt anybody, like why Just let it go, move on with your day and, like you said, with your interaction. You'll never interact with this person again. You know, I think so many people need have this need to over explain and that's a lack mindset, too, or a feeling of insecurity, and it's like no, I know my worth and value and we all need to tune into that and know our power. It's like our power. Sometimes pulling the plug and disconnecting is more powerful than engaging. Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1: 27:31

Yeah, I mean, it's kind of, I think, on a facade, if you like. I've been in conversations with many people and I don't, honestly, I don't continue these conversations like they. Just they start and then I'm like, oh, there it is, I don't want to go there, but it, you know, on a logical standpoint, sometimes it seems to make sense, you know if you need explanation, and so they're asking for that kind of demanding that explanation, or is it really? Does not need to be, never needs to be explained?

Speaker 2: 28:03

And as soon as somebody demands something, that's an energy pole, that's an energy vampire. You know tactic. It's like I need this. Well, no, I have a boundary. I'm allowed to say no, I can remove myself in the situation. But a lot of people, you know, if they're still in a place where they feel maybe insecure in themselves or they're unsure, they feel that they become bullied, they become victimized in that and it's unfortunate. It's like stand on your feet and know your worth and value and that's like the biggest part of this, like we're talking about these different timelines and you know they're successful, unconditionally loving, loved version of you, the CEO of your life. Would she or he need to explain themselves? No, you know your path, you know your worth, you know your value. They would just be like get their assistant to remove that energy from them and it's like so you can assist and move that away. Why engage? Why engage?

Speaker 1: 28:56

Yeah, I think it for me. I was like there were times where I just got so frustrated and it finally occurred to me I don't need this, I don't need this in my life, and that was enough. I was just like that's it, I'm done. I don't even like, I'm not even gonna entertain that at all.

Speaker 2: 29:11

Exactly. It's powerful to pull the plug sometimes and just be like hey, yeah, I don't, because it makes other people aware of your boundaries. Like a Huge part of manifestation and self-love is having these boundaries for yourself and not being Co-dependent with people when we feel like we owe everybody a bit of us. You know that's being co-dependent, that's being dependent on somebody else's opinion of you. We get to a point, like I said, if you're, if we're living and for the viewers listening if you're living your highest Timeline, your highest best good is serving the highest best good of those around you. You owe nobody an explanation for who you are.

Speaker 2: 29:48

Just show up as the best version of yourself like if you're going around being really mean to people and, like you know, you know Picking at people, maybe then you need to take a look at it and be like, okay, how are my emotions getting in the way of things, and maybe I should make amends and apologize. But no, if you're showing up as a great version of yourself, being unlike being firm, like we can be firm and we can be, you know, once in a while a short, a yes or no answer is fine, but you can be. You can spread as much love with that as you do with a long-winded answer, if not more, because it states your boundary.

Speaker 1: 30:25

Yeah, I mean I even recently I've had a trigger within my personal life that I Thought to myself, well, first off I went into the emotional part so I was like just emotionally responding, right. But then I later thought like, okay, if I look at this objectively, really it doesn't make any sense why that would be a problem. We know that's not the problem, but it's funny how you just immediately will get pulled into the emotion and then but it's noticing that, and then say, okay, why do I have this particular emotion about this thing? Look over there, that person doesn't care, you know.

Speaker 2: 30:58

Exactly, especially in the close interpersonal relationship, you'll find there's like a few key, deep wounds that people have, you know. It's like they need to be accepted. There's a fear of rejection and most people fear of not being heard and a fear of I can't remember the last couple. There's like these six core wounds that each and every one of each and every one of us carry a bit of, and it's like when those are Triggered, you know, and it could be from something as simple, when your kid is your parent, just like being busy and saying, no, I can't play with you right now, and that left enough of a mark in your psyche where, if somebody in your adulthood it's like, no, I'm going out with my friends, and you're like oh my gosh, I'm being abandoned.

Speaker 2: 31:36

Now you know, and it this is like you said, it's like you just need to understand, to have those emotions but understand that there's something deeper at play here and figuring it out and Transcending that and, you know, reparenting those, those parts of us knowing that, knowing that that other person Can't control our feelings unless we allow them to control our feelings.

Speaker 1: 32:04

So I'm going to ask you when do you feel like you made the shift from? Do you feel like it was like a very distinct time, or was it like gradual, where you went from maybe being aware of this to then being more confident in your ability to continue to question yourself until you got to the root of it? Like, is that essentially the shift into confidence about this stuff right, like you don't have to have somebody else helping you at the time?

Speaker 2: 32:37

Yeah, it was gradual. You know, I went through a phase where I was a single mom and you know you really have to be reliant on yourself. So I went from being like almost more codependent to being like super self-reliant. And then I came back to the center and I was like I married those two parts of me and I really started to ask myself why am I pushing these emotions away? You know, I can be stoic in my life.

Speaker 2: 32:59

My kids have taught me a lot. I'll tell you this any parent out there, when you realize how much your children teach you and they mirror things back to you, I'd see my children show up, how maybe I showed up and I'm like this is not good, like I don't want to raise and pass on this, like you know, this deep rooted trauma that I've held on to. So I really just started waking up and I started asking myself and I started really, you know, I'd even ask my children like if there was something going on and it was like, did this hurt you? You know, and I'd listen to what they said, because children, you know, they are so wise if you allow them to really tune into it. They like some of the words that come out of my kids mouth. I'm like I don't think you're channeling right now. I don't even like, know these words, you know, and they're so tuned in and I'm just like, wow.

Speaker 2: 33:45

And then I realized, you know, I always had issues with my relationship with the opposite sex, with men, because, you know, my dad left when I was really little. It's like those fatherhood wounds. And then, you know, I never got along with my brother really well and it was like then I have really tumultuous relationships because that's how what I was taught, men don't stay, they leave, you know. And I realized this and I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm creating all of this. It's a self fulfilling prophecy. And so then I realized I need to be confident. I started stepping outside my comfort zone and not being a scaredy cat, you know.

Speaker 2: 34:18

I would go out and public, I would speak, I would do things that scared me before, and then, when I get triggered, I'd start to really ask myself. But I almost found it like, because I'm a scientist by trade, I would use it like as a science experiment. I'm like, okay, I'm triggered right now, I'm going to feel the emotion. I'm not going to freak out and I'm going to sit with this and I'd ask myself the questions. I'd be like where's this coming from? I'd be like, you know, ask Spirit, ask my guides, where is this coming from? And the answer might not, usually didn't show up right then.

Speaker 2: 34:47

And then I'd have like an epiphany moment, like a day later, and I would like fall to my knees crying because it would be like this deep rooted emotion that I've held on to for 35 years, you know, and it was just like, wow, this is power. You know it's powerful to cry, it's powerful to be open and share your story of struggle. And, you know, when you get to the point where your stories don't make you emotional anymore, you know you can teach people with them and you can share it. And I don't know, resilience is such a beautiful thing and I feel and this is no judgment on society these days, maybe it is a little bit, but we're teaching our people to not be resilient anymore. You know we need to show up and teach our children, teach society, that resilience is. It's so important. It's important to be able to bounce back from things that push you down and not allow them to make you feel meek and not worthy, because once that weakness is fixed in you and your heart center. Nothing can take it from you.

Speaker 1: 35:53

Well, you can take. You can deal with it yourself, though it's not that it's like there forever, but you have to be the one. Nobody, like you said, nobody else or any other situation can, but you can actually deal with it. Yeah, that's beautiful.

Speaker 2: 36:07

Well, thank you. Yeah, thank you. This is wonderful and I you know this is our second time connecting and I really, really enjoyed our connections Awesome.

Speaker 1: 36:19

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