"Many of us see boredom as something to avoid, but what if it’s actually the key to unlocking your next great idea? 

Teaching 

What boredom really is: Boredom happens when your brain isn’t fully engaged or stimulated, leaving you restless or craving something to do, but it’s also a natural signal that you need a break from constant activity.

·  Increased Screen Time: Studies show that adults spend over 11 hours a day interacting with media, leading to decreased moments of  free mental time. This shift can reduce the time we spend in reflection or creative thinking.

·  Creativity and Downtime: Research indicates that taking breaks and allowing for boredom can enhance creativity. 

For example, a study found that participants who engaged in mundane tasks performed better on creative tasks afterward than those who were constantly stimulated.

·  Mental Health: A survey found that many people report feeling more stressed and anxious when they don’t allow time for boredom. 

constant busyness may hinder mental well-being, downtime  is essential for mental health. 

Power of Boredom:  Practical Steps

1.  Embrace Boredom as a Reset:

 Step 1:resist the urge to grab your phone. Sit for 5 minutes and just observe your thoughts.

 Step 2: Take a short walk without any distractions. Let your mind wander naturally.

Step 3: Keep a notebook handy to jot down any random ideas or thoughts that come up when you’re bored.

In closing 

All of that will lead to increased productivity, clearer thinking, and more creativity, ultimately helping you achieve your goals faster and with less stress. 

You'll find yourself more energized and focused, with a greater sense of control over your time and life.

Ageism refers to the stereotyping, prejudice, and discrimination against individuals or groups based on their age.

Ever feel like the world thinks you're past your prime just because you've celebrated a few extra birthdays?

or 

the surprise in someone's voice when you smash a workout?!

Ageism is that sneaky belief that people become “less”

 because they’re “more”... 

more experienced, more seasoned.

Here are 3 steps to help:

1.   Flip the Script
Next time  you tell yourself  “Too old for that,” Write a new affirmation

“It’s safe for me to try something new.”

“Its ok for me to give it a go.” 

“My age is my  asset.”

2.   Keep Learning and Trying New Things
Show  yourself and the world that curiosity and growth don’t have an expiration date.

3  Look for proof  for what you want to do.

I always find someone older than me whom is already good at doing what I aspire to do. Check out YouTube videos. TikTok etc .

 Give your mind the proof it needs to believe its possible. 

What if we are  not getting older rather “living longer” ?!

Topic: Say Yes to More!

1.    "Frank, when was the last time you said 'yes' to something that really surprised you? 

Maybe something you weren’t sure about at first, but it turned out to be a great experience?"(Sea Swim)

2.    "Do you ever feel like we get a little too comfortable saying 'no' as we get older? (Live longer)

3.    What do you think life would look like if you  just started saying 'yes' more often ?

Problem: 

As we get older, we often start saying “no”

 We stick to the familiar and shy away from the new!

 Imagine what your life could look like if you started saying yes more often!

3 Steps 

1.    Say Yes to New Experiences
Say yes to that invitation you’ve been dodging—

 a weekend road trip,  Hire a motor home 

trying a new restaurant,

or joining a local group. 

Each "yes" opens doors to new experiences, memories, and maybe even new friends.

2.    Say Yes to Self-Investment
When was the last time you said yes to you? 

·       Sign up for that online course, 

·       start the project you’ve been postponing, 

3.    Say Yes to Spontaneity
Get out of your routine and throw in some spontaneity. 

Say yes to the little things: 

a spontaneous walk, an unplanned visit to a friend, 

or even just saying “yes” to taking a break. 

Spontaneous moments bring an energy that a set routine can’t match.

P.S.:
"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take." – Lewis Carroll

Facing life challenges like illness, bereavement, or divorce can be overwhelming, but there are ways to reframe these experiences to help you cope and heal. Here’s a simple approach:

1. Acknowledge and Feel Your Emotions

• What to do: Let yourself feel whatever emotions come up—whether it’s sadness, anger, fear, or grief. These feelings are natural and deserve to be acknowledged. Give yourself permission to experience them without judgment.
• Why it helps: Accepting your emotions is the first step toward healing. When you allow yourself to feel, you’re not bottling up the pain, which can make things harder over time.

2. Look for Growth and Learning

• What to do: Try to reframe the situation as a chance for growth. Ask yourself, "What can I learn from this?" or "How can this experience make me stronger or wiser?"
• Why it helps: This approach turns pain into something meaningful. Instead of just surviving the hardship, you’re actively finding ways to grow from it, which can make the experience feel less overwhelming.

3. Focus on Gratitude and Resilience

• What to do: Even in difficult times, try to focus on things you’re grateful for—like the support of loved ones, small moments of joy, or just getting through the day. Also, work on building resilience by setting small, achievable goals to regain a sense of control.
• Why it helps: Shifting your focus from what you’ve lost to what you still have, and what you’re capable of overcoming, fosters hope and strength. It helps you see that even in adversity, there are still positive things to hold on to and build upon.

Are you going for gold? Or going through the motions?

Buzzing for life or stuck  on the starting blocks? 

How would you answer the question Frank “Are you  growing or dying”?

Embracing the mindset of continuous growth and curiosity is essential for a fulfilling and successful life. 

Think of a rose. Imagine it as a plant. 

Then think of a cut flower. 

Both look the same, One is growing, and one is dying.

The same is true with you and me. 

When we stop growing, we start dying. 

 When you stop growing anywhere that area immediately begins to die.

By cultivating an attitude of curiosity 

(code for nonjudgment) 

we ensure our personal and professional growth.

By staying  curious we keep our minds sharp and our spirits vibrant. 

This cultivates resilience, adaptability, and innovation—

 3 Steps 

1. Set Learning Goals:Identify a specific area you want to develop and go for it

2. Allocate Time for Learning:

non-negotiable 

10 minutes of reading each morning

 or a one hour online class weekly.

3. Engage with a Like-Minded Community:Join a group or  community of like minded people.My Freedom Community is a perfect example, bringing together people with a shared interest in personal improvement.

Keep learning. 

Keep growing. 

Keep mastering yourself — 

you are the only person in this world you need to beat.

 You don’t need to prove anything to anyone, you just need to be the best you that you could possibly be.

From the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning.”

― Jiddu Krishna murti

Affirmation of the week.. 💎my potential is limitless."

Going for Gold in your life. 

Rhys McClenaghan and 3  key steps that he took as a guide for listeners who aspire to achieve their own dreams. 

Step 1: Find a Dream You Love

 Why is that important ?

It keeps you motivated and driven.

1.   When you're passionate about your goal, you to put in the necessary effort and overcome challenges.  

Passion fuels dedication .

Step 2: Chase It

1. Set clear goals 

2.  Set actionable steps

3.  Stay disciplined, 

4.  and keep pushing forward, even when it gets tough."

   Step 3: Enjoy the Journey

"Enjoying the journey is vital because it's where the true growth happens. 

Fall in love with the journey. 

Embrace the learning, the challenges, and the small victories 

along the way. 

Conclusion

6.  Final Thoughts

Find what you love

 Chase it with everything you have and enjoy every step of the way regardless of your age."

 Famous people who achieved their dreams later in life:

1.  Colonel Harland Sanders - Founded KFC at the age of 65.

Ronald Reagan - Elected President of the United States at 69 after a career in acting and as Governor of California.

2.  Henry Ford - Created the Model T car at 45, revolutionizing the automobile industry.

3.  Samuel L. Jackson - Landed his breakthrough role in "Pulp Fiction" at 46

  Irish people who achieved their dreams later in life:

1.  Bram Stoker - Published "Dracula" at 50, becoming one of the most famous horror writers in history.

2.  Maeve Binchy - Published her first novel "Light a Penny Candle" at 42 and became one of Ireland's most beloved authors.

3.  Christy Moore - Achieved major success as a solo artist in his 40s after earlier success with the band Planxty.

4.  Seamus Heaney - Won the Nobel Prize in Literature at 56, cementing his status as a leading poet.

5.  Mary O'Hara - Began her career as a novelist in her 50s after decades as a harpist and singer.

6.  Nuala O'Faolain - Published her memoir "Are You Somebody?" at 58, which became an international bestseller.

7.  Richard Harris - Gained major film success in his 60s with roles in "Gladiator" and "Harry Potter."

8.  Brian Friel - Wrote his acclaimed play "Dancing at Lughnasa" at 63, which won multiple awards and brought him international fame.

We are talking about men

 Confidence and assertiveness 

Challenges Men Face:

We all know society can be tough on men, expecting them to always be strong and self-reliant. 

Makes  it hard to show vulnerability or ask for help. Because of 

·    fear of rejection

·      failure 

·    balance between  assertive and  aggressive can be tricky.

Why Confidence and Assertiveness Matter:

1.    When you're confident, you believe in yourself and your abilities. 

2.    you make decisions without second-guessing .

3.    When you’re  Assertive  you can  expressyour needs and wants in a respectful way.

4.     Together,  you navigate life at home, at work, or in social situations.

Action Steps:

1.    Get to know yourself 

Focus on your strengths. 

Write them down. 

Or ask someone you trust. 

2.    Practice good self-talk

  "I can do this."  

Use "I" statements.

 Not "You never listen," 

"I feel unheard when my suggestions are ignored."

3.    Pay attention to your body language. Maintain eye contact, use a calm tone, and stand tall.

4.    !!!Role-play assertive scenarios with a friend or coach. This can help you practice and feel more comfortable.

In closing

It doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a journey!

 Remember, it’s not about being perfect. It’s about being true to yourself and standing up for what you need in a respectful way.

Have you ever felt a sense of fear, panic, or overwhelm - even when you know it’s not rational?    Learning how to get rid of anxiety is essential to living a normal life.  

You want to live a full life, not be tied down by hesitation and fear.      Anxiety is your body's way of signaling that something needs attention.   It's a call to action, not a life sentence.   take proactive steps to understand and manage it, you can harness this energy, turning it from a crippling force into a powerful motivator for positive change and growth.        

Affirmation of the week.. 💎   (use this when Anxiety arises)   "I am in control of my thoughts.  I choose peace and calm in this moment."    Here are 3 steps to help you when you feel anxious;    

1. Cultivate Awareness  Observe your thoughts and emotions without judgment.  Recognize that anxiety often stems from a desire to control the future.  

By being aware you can create a space where you can choose a different response.    

2.Engage in Physical Activity  
 
2.1. Breathe  
2.2. Interrupt the pattern of thinking you are in. Exercise can be a powerful anxiety reliever.   
Move  
Go for a walk.  

3.Practice Mindfulness Meditation  Spend a few minutes each day practicing mindfulness to bring your attention to the present moment. Sit quietly, focus on your breath, and gently bring your mind back     |   
 
 
 
 

 
 
  |    "Fear does not prevent death. It prevents life."     |   

Let’s kick things off with a light-hearted question!

1.When was the last time you had a good or a wee cry ?

1.           Different catalysts have different chemical makeup. 

2.           This means  the tears that you cry from chopping onion versus the tears that you cry when you're grieving look totally different under microscope. 

Tears – the facts 

Rose Lynne Fisher

“The Topography of Tears”

American  Photographer expert in Microphotography. 

“Tears are in the medium of our most primal language for  moments as unrelenting as death, as basic as hunger. 

They are  the evidence of our inner life overflowing  into consciousness.”

They release us to the  short circuit of feeling good. Shedding tears is  shedding old skin. 

Here are the facts 

·    Tears release oxytocin and endorphins that help ease your physical and emotional pain. 

·    Tears hold stress hormones that they intentionally evacuate from your body. 

·    Tears calm your  sympathetic nervous system.

·    lower your heart rate, 

·    lower your blood pressure.

·    They're intentional, functional and helpful.

 3-step action plan to help men deal with crying in a healthy and empowering way.

Step 1: Acknowledge and Accept Your Emotions 

Step 2: Find a Safe Space  A private place

Step 3: Reflect and Reframe 

Step 1: Acknowledge and Accept Your Emotions 

• Recognize the Importance: Understand that crying is a natural human response to emotions. It’s a sign of strength, not weakness.
• Self-Acceptance: Allow yourself to feel. It’s okay to cry.
• Avoid Suppression: Suppressing emotions can lead to mental health issues. Acceptance is the first step toward emotional well-being.

Step 2: Find a Safe Space 

• Private Moments: If you’re uncomfortable crying in public, find a quiet and private place. This could be your room, car, or any safe environment.

• Trusted Confidant: Talk to someone you trust – a friend, family member, or therapist. Sharing your feelings can provide comfort and perspective.

• Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a cathartic process. It helps in processing emotions and understanding their roots.

Step 3: Reflect and Reframe 

• Reflect:  take  time to reflect. What triggered your emotions? Understanding the cause can help manage future reactions.
• Reframe: Change the narrative around crying.  view it as  a step toward emotional healing.
• Growth Mindset: Embrace the experience as part of your personal growth towards becoming more emotionally intelligent and resilient.

Conclusion 

 Crying is a natural and essential part of the human experience.

 By 

·    acknowledging your emotions, 

·    finding a safe space, 

·    and reflecting on the experience, you can transform crying into a powerful tool for emotional growth and  taking  control of your mental well-being. 

So, next time you cry, 

I want you remind yourself that your

·    Tears are productive. 

·    Tears  are on purpose.

·    They are intentional. 

And remember Eagles soar alone 

Sparrows flock. 

Have the courage to do the clever thing cry when it’s called for .Bottom of Form

Is there something in your life that you would like to improve,to have,to get,to change?

Whatever it is 

Step one is more information opens the door! 

Here’s what you need to know! 

The Inside Scoop 

1. Your thoughts create your future.

2. 60,000 70,000 thoughts per day and 90 % are repeated. 

The principles of Neuroscience say that

 Nerve Cells that fire together wire together 

3. Our current results are the  proof  of  our past thinking.

Based on studies by Doctor Joe Dispenza  NYT Best Selling author Breaking the Habit of being yourself 

Formula 

1. Create a vision of what you want and hold the vision.

Get beyond yourself. 

2. Connect to the emotion of the vision – now! 

Install new circuitry. 

Select a new possibility and emotionally embrace the future every single day! 

3. Practice – With ease flow and joy. 

Sustain a modified state of mind. 

If you want a different result you have to 

1.             Think about your thinking. 

2.             Ask yourself What are the emotions I live by everyday ?

In closing: 

The Stress Solution Success  System 

 3-steps solve any problem standing in the way of your goals:

1. Identify Limiting Beliefs: Uncover and challenge the thoughts that are holding you back.

2. Reframe Your Thinking: Replace negative patterns with your  empowering, positive vision

3. Take Consistent Action: 

Practice living FROM there daily until it becomes your new reality

“When the pain of staying the same 

outweighs the pain of change 

then you will take action” 

Be defined by your vision of the future –

not living by the memories of the past ?

Can you stay in the unknown?

Become worthy to receive ?

 Can you Get to the end of your belief ?

1.                        Reflect 

2.                        Rehearse 

3.                        Reactivate new circuitry

1.                         Ask, “how would I love it to be?”

2.                         Write it out in the present tense. “I am so happy and grateful now that..

3.                        Assume the feeling of the wish fulfilled. Feel it. Close your eyes. Go inside. Pretend. 

4.                        act like you are that person now. Behave from there now.

5.                        Rinse and repeat.

PS. 

"You are braver than you believe, 

stronger than you seem,

 and smarter than yo

Topic: Overcoming Negative Self-Talk

Do you hear voices Frank?

Have you got any stories /jokes about it ?

Would you know what you say to yourself in certain circumstances ?

Example 1: "I'm not good enough to do this job."

Example 2: "I'll never be able to lose weight and get fit."

Example 3: "I always mess things up."

Negative self-talk can be significant 

barrier to mental wellness and 

personal growth. 

It can undermine your confidence, 

increase stress, 

and hold you back from achieving 

your potential.

Action Steps:

1.   Identify and Challenge Negative Thoughts:

1.   Awareness:

2.   Challenge: Once you identify a negative thought, challenge its validity. 

3.   Practice Self-Compassion:

Example 1: "I'm not good enough to do this job."

Identify and Challenge Negative Thoughts:

Awareness: Recognize this thought as soon as it occurs.

Challenge: Ask yourself, "What evidence do I have that I am not good enough? Have I succeeded in similar tasks before?" Remind yourself of your qualifications and past achievements.

• Replacement: Replace the negative thought with, "I have the skills and experience to handle this job. I can learn and grow from any challenges that come my way."
•  

Example 2: "I'll never be able to lose weight and get fit."

• Practice Self-Compassion:

Acknowledge: Understand that many people struggle with fitness goals and it's okay to find it challenging.

Be Kind: Instead of being harsh on yourself, say, "It's okay to take small steps. I am working towards a healthier lifestyle."

Encouragement: Focus on the progress you've made, no matter how small. Celebrate small victories, like choosing a healthy meal or completing a workout, and remind yourself that each step is a move in the right direction.

Example 3: "I always mess things up."

• Affirm Positive Beliefs:
   
  • Affirmations: Create affirmations like, "I am capable of learning from my mistakes," and "Every experience is an opportunity to grow."
•  
  • Repetition: Repeat these affirmations daily, especially after encountering a setback.
•  
  • Reframing: Reframe the thought to, "Mistakes are a part of the learning process. Each time I make a mistake, I get closer to 
• 
  

mastering this task."

PS. 

Affirm Positive Beliefs:

o    Affirmations: Create a list of positive affirmations that resonate with you. 

 For example, "I am capable," "I am worthy of love and respect," or "I can overcome challenges."

o    Repetition: Repeat these affirmations daily, especially during times of self-doubt. This practice can help rewire your brain to focus on positive beliefs and gradually diminish the power

of negative self-talk.

By applying these steps consistently, you can transform your inner dialogue and foster a more positive and supportive mindset. 

 Be patient and persistent

Changing ingrained thought patterns takes time and effort.

Inspirational Quote: Dalai Lama

"The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful." – 

Believe in your ability to change your thoughts, and you will change your life.

What do you do when  life just doesn't go to plan.?

When was the last time life didn’t go to plan for you?

 Weather!?  Cancelled events?  Appointment schedule changed?

No one can ever be prepared for the unexpected. 

it’s easy to become  anxious and feel as if your life is out of control.  

Some things are easier  to deal with, like a flat tyre or your child forgetting their lunch. 

But

 What about  the situations in life that loom so large they overwhelm you. 

·       losing a job,

·        the end of a relationship 

·       or an ongoing illness with yourself 

·       or someone you love.   

How do you let go ? It’s all about dealing with emotions 

·       Story about the child, the party and disappointment.

It’s about learning to deal with difficult emotions.

Here’s what to do:

Step 1:  Accept  that it is happening .

Have your go to mantra  “I’ve survived 100% of everything else I’ve been through.” 

Step 2: Focus on what you CAN control. 

Identify the aspects of your life that are within your control and concentrate your efforts there. 

Example - you can't control  others 

but you can control you.

shift the  focus 

more empowered and less overwhelmed. 

Step 3:  Do the work before the crisis.

 Practice  mindfulness  such as meditation 

Try my 

Peaceful Powerful You 21 day Meditation Program

P.S.

In crisis right now?

Gently bring your focus back to what you are doing right now. 

Take a look at your surroundings - What do see, feel, hear, smell, taste? 

“I am Walking .. I  am seeing  the trees. ..

·       We learn through failure. 

·       Successful people know there is no certainty in life. The certainty is how we will handle life. 

·       Life is not about the goal, it's about who you become. 

Like I say to my Clients and  Freedom Community Members 

“The Solution to Every Problem Is the Same,  

How Can I Look at This Differently?”

Today I want to discuss something that is a problem with some of my Freedom Community members 

Boundaries are the invisible lines we draw 

both with ourselves and in our interactions with others. 

Physical boundaries are the obvious ones – e.g. 

·        sitting beside a stranger on a plane 

·         in a lift .

 What problem does having good ones solve?

They give you

·        balance, 

·        order 

·        control 

which means better relationships better wellbeing which  

·        Stops burnout 

·        Overwhelm 

·        Resentment

Some signs you could be lacking in personal boundaries. 

·         Overwhelming Stress: 

         Always busy?! 

         due to difficulty setting limits 

·         Difficulty Saying No

         fear of disappointing others. 

·         Feeling Taken Advantage Of:

         Consistently feeling taken advantage of in relationships, emphasizing the need to assert limits. 

Here are 3 practical steps to take today, to start implementing boundaries into your life. 

1.                           Self-Reflection: (Great time for the journal!) Begin by reflecting on your own needs, values, and limits. Identify areas in your life where you feel overwhelmed, stressed, or lacking in personal space. 

Consider what boundaries would help create a more balanced and positive experience for you. This self-awareness is the foundation for establishing effective boundaries. 

2.                           Communication: Once you've identified the boundaries you need, practice clear and assertive communication. Be honest with yourself and others about your limits and expectations. 

Effective communication helps others understand your perspective and encourages mutual respect. 

3.       Consistent Implementation: Consistency is key to boundary-setting. Implement your boundaries consistently, both with yourself and with others. This may involve saying no when necessary, prioritizing self-care routines, and reinforcing your limits in various situations. Over time,

Affirmation of the week

“Saying no to others is saying yes to me.”

Have you ever wanted something to happen – been disappointed it didn’t 

 and then were very grateful things turned out the way they did ?

Today, we’re going to talk about something a little different – Letting go and trusting life  

AKA

 releasing the need to control every outcome 

 understanding that not everything will go as planned, and that's okay. 

 -we may think of something as a ‘failure’ or a setback,

 later  we will realize it all happened perfectly!

 By letting go, we make space for growth, learning, and unexpected opportunities. 

 It’s a practice of patience and openness, allowing us to find peace and contentment in the journey itself, rather than being fixated solely on the destination. 

 Example I started my own business but I’ve faced 

Many setbacks not least Cancer, covid 

But I’ve stayed committed to my vision,

learning from ‘failures.’

 Each setback becomes a lesson, not a defeat, bringing them closer to their goals.

Stay motivated, confident turning roadblocks into stepping stones 

 Present moment awareness keeps us grounded amidst life's changes. 

 Here are 3 simple steps to bring you right back into the present moment 

1.                Scan your body. Take a moment to conduct a quick body scan, starting from the top of your head and slowly moving your attention down to your toes. As you scan each part of your body, consciously release any tension you notice. For example, drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, and soften your facial muscles. Letting go of physical tension helps to anchor your awareness in the present moment, promoting relaxation and mindfulness. 

 2.                Pause and breathe. Box Breath. 

 3.       Make time for mindfulness: Incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine.

·      such as meditation, 

·      yoga, 

·      or mindful walking. 

PS.  Affirmation of the week 

 Say this out loud with me now  Frank (and anytime you feel overwhelmed)

 ‘I release and let go. 

 I Move with the flow!’ 

P.S. “You can’t connect the dots looking forward, 

you can only connect them looking backwards” 

- Steve jobs 

 1.                Set your intention.

2.                Imagine it in full technicolour.

3.                Write it down as if its real now “I’m so happy and grateful  now that ...”

4.                Read it out loud every day.  

5.                Take action. 

1.      Breathe out slowly, releasing all the air from your lungs.

2.      Breathe in through your nose as you slowly count to four in your head. ...

3.      Hold your breath for a count of four.

4.      Exhale for another count of four.

5.      Hold your breath again for a count of four.

6.      Repeat for three to four rounds.

How do you see yourself ?

 Do you know what your self image is ? 

Mental Blueprint   if we want lasting change this is where we go 

Theatre of the mind 

A person cannot rise above how the see themselves 

 Direct correlation between our self-image and the results we get. 

we cannot outperform the image we’ve created in our minds. 

It’s an inside job.

To figure out what your self-image is, all you have to do is examine each area of your life. 

results are you getting in your relationships, health, income and work? 

To re-make your life, you must build a new self-image. 

It will take some effort, but everything outside will begin to change as soon as you start to alter the image. 

Here’s how 

1.             See where you succeeded. 

2.             Feel it.

3.             Flip from memory to Imagination  and FEEL  it in the future ! 

Feel like a winner !

Affirmation of the week.. 💎

"When I shift my perspective, the world transforms before my eyes, revealing new possibilities and opportunities." 

To be the change you want to see, you must start seeing and thinking of yourself differently.  

Here are 3 steps you can take right away 

1. Visualise: 

2. Write It Down: 

3. Choose One Thing to Change: 

If you’d like further support, as always – Freedom Community online support group 

 There is no way to happiness.  Happiness IS THE WAY 

"It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not!" 

This week it’s all about 

feel the fear and do it any way! 

It’s a crucial part of personal growth.

When was the last time you felt the fear and did it anyway?

Mine a box jump in the gym. 

1.Felt it.

2.Made the desire to do it bigger than the fear. (Imagined it done) 

3.Practiced often on a smaller one (bite sized chunks)

4.Did it! 

5.Did it again! 

However, by facing fears head-on, we open ourselves up to transformative opportunities and profound personal development. 

3 steps to get you from where you are to where you want to be!

STEP 1 - Identify Your Fears: The first step to conquering fear is to shine a light on it. 

Take a moment to identify and acknowledge what exactly you're afraid of. 

When it comes to facing our fears, it's crucial to go beyond the surface-level discomfort.

 For example  the fear of meeting a significant other: On the surface, it may seem like a simple reluctance, but when you go deeper you  uncover a fear of being hurt or betrayed stemming  from past experiences of disloyalty or abandonment. 

Whether it's fear of failure, rejection, or the unknown, understanding

 your fear is the cornerstone of overcoming it.   

STEP 2 - Challenge Your Beliefs: 

Once you've identified your fears, 

question the beliefs underlying them.

Ask yourself:  Are they serving me, or holding me back?

 Challenging the validity of your fears,  strips away their power over you. 

By challenging these beliefs, you can  to dismantle their hold over you and see them for what they usually are: 

limitations that can be overcome with a shift in perspective and mindset. 

 STEP 3 - Take Courageous Action: 

Courage is not the absence of fear but the willingness to act despite it. 

Take small, deliberate steps towards facing your fears.

 Start with manageable challenges and gradually expand your comfort zone.

 Remember, each step forward, no matter how small, brings you closer to freedom from fear and closer to your full potential. 

fear is natural, but not insurmountable.   

Affirmation of the week.. 💎 

"I welcome fear as a chance to grow. 

In times of tragedy, hope can be found even amidst the darkest of days. Despite the challenges we face, stories of resilience and courage emerge, reminding us of the human spirit's strength.

You know that feeling when you are struggling with a particular situation, and you see someone overcoming something similar – that little flicker is called HOPE. From the ongoing global crises to our own personal struggles, finding hope becomes a guiding light through the shadows.

In exploring this topic for the week, we witness the transformative power of hope to bring solace and renewal, even in our darkest moments.

Almost immediately springing from the stories of tragedy, we begin to hear of miraculous moments of kindness, compassion, empathy and evidence of the resiliency of the human spirit. In one moment, the world unites and with one gentle, generous hand, reaches out to touch those who have been hurt by devastation.

Kindness is demonstrated by people worldwide who see catastrophe and whose hearts are touched and then act in kindness. We hear of people fundraising, gifting food or clothing, attending rallies or depending on the circumstances, travelling to the troubled spot or person to help.

The strength of the human spirit is demonstrated in a profound way when viewed through tragedy.

I am amazed when I hear the stories of human triumph born out of tragedy—amazing stories of the will to survive and the will to help others survive. We as one person cannot change the entire world, but we can certainly give the world our best. We can be inspired by the acts of kindness born out of these circumstances that bond the human race together, show the strength of the human spirit and give hope of better things to come. Although we are never glad when tragedy visits, we can be aware and seize the opportunity to do good in this world.

Affirmation of the week.. 💎

"Through my toughest times, I hold onto that flicker of hope, lighting the way to better days."

Here are 3 questions that may help you to find that glimmer of hope if you are struggling at this time;

(Grab your journal / a pen and paper!)

1.       Reflect on your current emotions and write down how you're feeling. Explore the reasons behind these emotions and any patterns or triggers you may notice.

2.       You have faced challenges before – How did you overcome them? How did you navigate through those difficult times, and what strengths or resources did you draw upon? Maybe you spoke to a professional, maybe you took some time off or asked someone to help you out.

3.       Write down some things you are grateful for right at this moment, no matter how small. Your health, your partner, your dog, your friends, your home, your beautiful eyes. Take some time to really feel that gratitude. This can be hard to do when you are really challenged, but I promise it helps.

4.       Visualise a future where you've overcome your current struggles and are thriving. Write about the person you want to become and the life you’d envision for yourself.

If you’d like further support, as always – please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Today I want to discuss something that most of us will go through from time to time, some of us (me included!) more than others.

✨Perfectionism✨

What is Perfectionism?

Perfectionism is a trait that makes life an endless report card on accomplishments or looks. When healthy, it can be self-motivating and drive you to overcome adversity and achieve success. When unhealthy, it can be a fast and enduring track to unhappiness.

What makes extreme perfectionism so toxic is that while those in its grip desire success, they are most focused on avoiding failure, resulting in a negative orientation. They don’t believe in unconditional love, expecting others’ affection and approval to be dependent on a flawless performance.

Perfectionism is driven primarily by internal pressures, such as the desire to avoid failure or harsh judgment. There is likely a social component as well, because perfectionistic tendencies have increased substantially among young people over the past 30 years, regardless of gender or culture. 

Perfectionism can arise from a combination of internal and external factors, and its roots can vary from person to person. Here are some common causes of perfectionism:

·         Cultural and Societal Pressure: Societal norms emphasising success and external validation, exacerbated by the influence of social media, contribute to the pressure to conform to unrealistic standards.

·         Parental and Family Influences: Growing up in an environment where parental approval is contingent upon achievement or success can foster perfectionism, as individuals internalise the fear of failure or rejection.

·         Personality Traits and Insecurity: Certain personality traits, such as conscientiousness and a strong desire for control, along with feelings of inadequacy or low self-esteem, may contribute to the development of perfectionism as a coping mechanism.

In a world obsessed with perfection, the journey of embracing imperfection might seem daunting.

However, it is a path that can lead to profound self-acceptance and personal growth.

Embracing imperfection is about acknowledging that being flawed is an intrinsic part of being human.

By letting go of the pursuit of unattainable perfection, we can unlock the true potential within ourselves. 

How can you overcome Perfectionism?

Letting go of the comparison mindset can help you to achieve at a high level, without being beholden to some impossibly perfect ideal.

Some steps to help you to achieve this;

1.       Set Realistic Goals: Break down your tasks into smaller, achievable goals, and set realistic expectations. Understand that perfection is unattainable, and focus on progress rather than flawless outcomes. This shift in mindset can alleviate the pressure associated with perfectionism.

2.       Practice Self-Compassion: Cultivate self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. When faced with mistakes or setbacks, acknowledge them without harsh self-criticism. Understand that everyone makes mistakes, and these moments are opportunities for learning and growth.

3.       Challenge Negative Thoughts: Actively challenge and reframe negative thoughts related to perfectionism. Question the unrealistic standards you set for yourself and consider more balanced and compassionate perspectives. Recognise the value in imperfection and acknowledge that your worth is not solely determined by flawless performance. Engaging in cognitive restructuring can help reshape perfectionistic thinking patterns.

What are healthy boundaries?

Healthy boundaries serve as the essential framework for maintaining balance and well-being in various aspects of our lives. These boundaries are like the invisible lines we draw to define our own personal limits, both with ourselves and in our interactions with others. 

Establishing and communicating these boundaries is an empowering act of self-care, creating space for personal growth, maintaining a sense of autonomy, and contributing to a more fulfilling and peaceful life. In essence, understanding and implementing healthy boundaries is the cornerstone of cultivating a life that aligns with our own personal values and promotes overall well-being.

Some signs you could be lacking in personal boundaries;

·         Overwhelming Stress: Always busy?! Frequent stress may indicate a lack of personal boundaries, often due to difficulty setting limits on commitments.

·         Difficulty Saying No: Challenges in saying 'no', possibly driven by a fear of disappointing others.

·         Feeling Taken Advantage Of: Consistently feeling taken advantage of in relationships, emphasising the need to assert limits.

·         Undefined Sense of Self: Struggling to define personal values, impacting the ability to maintain a distinct sense of self.

Imagine a friend who frequently reaches out for favours, often expecting immediate assistance without considering your availability or boundaries. Without setting boundaries, this can become overwhelming, impacting your personal time and causing stress.

Positive result of setting boundaries

Recognising the need for balance, you communicate with your friend about the importance of your time and well-being. You kindly express your willingness to help within reasonable limits, emphasising the importance of occasionally saying no to prioritise your own needs. By setting these boundaries, your friend becomes more considerate, understanding the value of respecting both your capacity to assist and your personal time. This shift allows you to maintain a healthier balance in your life, fostering a more sustainable and fulfilling friendship.

 Here are 3 practical steps to take today, to start implementing boundaries into your life;

 1.       Self-Reflection: (Great time for the journal!) Begin by reflecting on your own needs, values, and limits. Identify areas in your life where you feel overwhelmed, stressed, or lacking in personal space. Consider what boundaries would help create a more balanced and positive experience for you. This self-awareness is the foundation for establishing effective boundaries.

 2.       Communication: Once you've identified the boundaries you need, practice clear and assertive communication. Be honest with yourself and others about your limits and expectations. Clearly express your needs and the reasons behind them, emphasising the importance of self-care and maintaining a healthy balance. Effective communication helps others understand your perspective and encourages mutual respect.

 3.       Consistent Implementation: Consistency is key to boundary-setting. Implement your boundaries consistently, both with yourself and with others. This may involve saying no when necessary, prioritising self-care routines, and reinforcing your limits in various situations. Over time, consistent boundary implementation reinforces the understanding that these limits are crucial for your well-being, fostering healthier relationships and a more balanced life.

What is Emotional Eating?

Emotional eating refers to the consumption of food as a response to emotional triggers rather than physiological hunger.

Individuals engage in emotional eating to cope with various emotions such as stress, overwhelm, sadness or boredom.

It often involves seeking comfort or distraction through food, and the consumption is driven by emotional needs rather than nutritional requirements. Emotional eating can become a habitual pattern, and addressing it typically involves recognising and managing the underlying emotions, developing alternative coping strategies, and fostering a more balanced relationship with food.

When we consume food, especially those with lower nutritional value, the release of neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin in the brain plays a pivotal role in shaping our future eating behaviours. Foods high in sugars and refined carbohydrates may provide a temporary surge in pleasure and satisfaction due to the rapid release of dopamine, contributing to a sense of reward and pleasure.

However, these types of foods often lack the sustained nutritional content needed to keep us feeling full and satisfied over an extended period.  

What is Mindful Eating?

Mindful eating is a practice that involves cultivating a heightened awareness and presence during meals. It emphasises being fully engaged with the sensory experience of eating, including the taste, texture, and aroma of food, as well as recognising and responding to hunger and fullness cues. The goal of mindful eating is to bring a non-judgmental, intentional focus to the act of consuming food, fostering a healthier and more mindful relationship with eating and overall well-being.

Today’s fast-paced society offers people an abundance of food choices. On top of that, distractions have shifted attention away from the actual act of eating toward televisions, computers, and smartphones.

Eating has become a mindless act, often done quickly. This can be problematic since it takes time for your brain to register that you’re full. If you eat too fast, the fullness signal may not arrive until you have already eaten too much. This is very common in binge eating disorder.

By eating mindfully, you restore your attention and slow down, making eating an intentional act instead of an automatic one.

Building a more positive relationship with food may be quite straight forward for some but very difficult for others. However, there are many simple ways to get started, some of which can have powerful benefits on their own:

·         Eating more slowly — not rushing your meals.

·         Chewing thoroughly.

·         Eliminating distractions; for example, turning off the TV and putting down your phone.

·         Focusing on how the food makes you feel.

·         Stopping eating when you’re full.

·         Asking yourself why you’re eating, whether you’re truly hungry, and whether the food you chose is nutritious.

To begin with, it’s a good idea to pick one meal per day to focus on these points.

Once you feel confident in practicing the techniques, mindfulness will become more natural. Then you can focus on implementing these methods during more meals.

If you feel like you need more support on this – please don’t hesitate to reach out.

I hope this helps you in some way today !

“The key to a joyful life is found in the balance of a healthy Mind, Body & Soul”

As Valentine's Day was this week, and in the midst of the heart-shaped chocolates and romantic gestures, remember that the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself 💘

The quality of your life is the quality of your relationships – and that includes your relationship with yourself. Learning to love yourself is essential to your own happiness, to your success in relationships and to the way you interact with the world.

When you exude confidence and joy, you’ll attract others with the same zest for living. This improves the quality of your relationships, which improves your life. The cycle is clear – and it all starts with falling in love with yourself.

But where does self-love come from? And how can you build it?

Self-love comes from truly knowing and accepting yourself. It grows when you recognise your value, embrace your imperfections, and appreciate what makes you unique. It's about being kind to yourself, showing compassion, and understanding that your worth is intrinsic, not dependent on others' approval.

Building self-love is a transformative process that requires intentional effort and self-reflection.

Here are some ways to foster and strengthen self-love:

BE KIND TO YOURSELF (This takes practice !)

It seems simple, but it can be one of the hardest acts to master. We grow up in a society that is always telling us how to look, how to live and even how to feel. If you’re wondering how to love yourself, the first step is to give yourself permission to be human. The way you talk to yourself affects your mood and your behaviour. It’s OK to hold yourself to high standards and to feel negative emotions occasionally, but don’t get stuck in a cycle of negativity. Catch yourself when you fall into negative self-talk and make a conscious effort to change your words into something positive.

SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

Setting boundaries is an essential act of self-love. It involves recognising and respecting your emotional and physical limits, creating a space that prioritises your own well-being. By clearly defining your boundaries, you empower yourself to communicate needs, say no when necessary, and invest time and energy in activities that align with your values. It's a powerful affirmation of your worth and a non-negotiable aspect of your self-love journey.

ADJUST YOUR PHYSICAL STATE

Your physical state – your posture, breath and movement – is the key to your emotional state. Start by straightening your spine, drop your shoulders back and raise your head high. SMILE 😊 These actions send signals to your brain that you’re proud and confident. Prioritise daily activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Whether it's walking, going to the gym or taking time for a hobby, self-care rituals contribute to a positive and nurturing relationship with yourself.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH SUPPORTIVE PEOPLE

It’s true that your most important relationship is with yourself, but that doesn’t mean allowing negativity into your life. Surround yourself with people who truly care about you and think the best of you. Create healthy relationships that bring positivity to your life, and let go of any relationships that aren’t supportive and caring.

MEDITATE

Meditation is one way to not only change your breath – which is part of your physical state – but also to change your entire mindset. Meditation is a powerful tool for cultivating self-love and acceptance. Through regular practice, it fosters mindfulness, gently allowing individuals to explore thoughts and emotions without judgment. This introspection creates an opportunity to transform self-limiting beliefs and negative thought patterns, promoting a compassionate attitude toward oneself. 

I'm excited to kick off another week by sending you a dose of inspiration and motivation. My goal is simple: to fill your inbox with valuable thoughts, updates, and the positive energy you need to conquer the week ahead. Your feedback and thoughts mean a lot to me, so don't hesitate to reply !
Onto today’s topic - Unveiling the Truth Within Ourselves
Affirmation of the week.. 💎

"I let go of those untrue stories I tell myself. By facing my own truth, I make room for real beliefs and discover my true, highest potential."
Do you know that most of the time the stories we tell ourselves in our minds aren't true?
They're like made-up tales filled with self-doubt and wrong ideas about who we are. These thoughts can hold us back and stop us from growing. It's important to question these stories, challenge the lies we tell ourselves, and see our abilities in a more honest way. By doing this, we can open the door to personal growth and discover our true potential.

4 dangerous lies you might tell yourself (that are silently holding you back!)

 1. The lie of "I'll be happy when..." We all know this one right?!

Reframe: "I choose happiness in the present moment."

(it’s okay to want something, but make sure your happiness does not depend on it!)

 2. The lie of "I don't have time for [X]..."

Stop blaming time. We all make time for the things we really care about. 

 Reframe: "I don't have time for X in my schedule today, so if X is important to me, I will re-look at my current priorities."

 3. The lie of "I'm not capable of [X]..."

Self defeating language is always a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Reframe: "I may not be proficient in X yet, but I can learn and grow."

4. "I'm waiting for the perfect moment to do [X]..."

There's no such thing. The idea of waiting for the ‘perfect moment’ to do anything can be a subtle form of procrastination, often hindering progress. In reality, there might never be an ideal time, and waiting for perfection can lead to missed opportunities. Rather than delaying, consider embracing the present and taking incremental steps towards your goal. Understand that progress is often messy, and learning occurs through experience. By letting go of the notion of a perfect moment, you empower yourself to start the journey, make adjustments along the way, and discover that the process itself can be more rewarding than waiting for an elusive perfection.

Reframe: "Every moment is the perfect moment to start, embrace the imperfections, and grow along the way."

Challenge the stories you tell yourself this week.

Our thoughts can sometimes trick us with self-doubt and misleading tales.

Peel away those layers, question the lies, and embrace a more honest view of your abilities.

By doing so, you open the door to personal growth and unlock your true potential. Let authenticity guide your thoughts, and watch how it transforms your week.

 “A belief system is nothing more than a thought you’ve thought, over and over again”

Wayne W Dyer 

Today I want to discuss the importance of our daily practices.

I want to share a simple yet powerful reminder: “We get better at what we practice.”

The purpose of this reminder is to get away from the idea of being naturally ‘good’ or ‘bad’ at a given skillset and instead see the skill as being something we have practiced a lot or something we have little practice in. 

Consider the example of pull-ups at the gym. Whether you struggle with them or find them effortless, it’s not a testament to innate abilities but rather a reflection of your practice. This mindset has profound implications for personal and professional growth, challenging us to view our skills as dynamic and improvable.

An example in the professional world may be to become a better communicator. Whether it’s speaking in public or writing, practice refines our skills. Picture a colleague who used to struggle with presentations but, with practice, turned into a confident speaker.

Here are 3 practical steps to help you:

Step 1. Identify Areas for Improvement:

Reflect on aspects of your life where you want to see positive changes. If it’s effective communication, pinpoint specific situations like meetings or presentations where you can enhance your skills.

Step 2. Cultivate Daily Micro-Practices:

Break down your improvement goals into small, manageable tasks. For instance, if you’re working on time management, start by allocating focused blocks of time for different tasks each day. Consistent daily micro-practices add up over time.

Step 3. Regular Reflection and Adaptation:

Periodically assess your progress. If you’re aiming to cultivate a more positive mindset, reflect on your reactions to challenges. A good time to journal ! Adjust your approach based on what resonates positively, reinforcing the behaviours you want to cultivate.

In embracing the philosophy that ‘we become what we practice,’ let’s collectively foster a culture of intentional growth and continuous improvement.

Each small step we take today shapes the success we aspire to tomorrow.

Like I say;

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the second best time is now!”

Here’s to purposeful practice and the transformative journey ahead !