The Original canceled radio guys. Chris and Costello: SEASON 6
Trump's Tantrums and Ticket Tribulations: Near Misses, Grooming Gaffes, and Political Parodies
Is Donald Trump really just a mischievous child trapped in an adult's body? Join us for a hilarious episode filled with wild stories and sharp satire as we kick off with Chris's terrifying hydroplaning incident on a Utah highway. From near-death experiences to beard grooming disasters and even a muscle tear that derailed his summer plans, Chris takes us on a rollercoaster ride of emotions. But don't worry, we lighten the mood with some laugh-out-loud moments about Chris's grooming mishaps and a brief but entertaining mention of Lizzo.
Next, we're hitting a nostalgic note as we reminisce about the good old days when concert tickets didn't require you to sell a kidney! We'll compare the affordable prices of legendary bands like the Rolling Stones to today's astronomical fees for stars like Olivia Rodrigo. Get ready for a candid take on Lizzo's appearance at the White House, her public persona, and the controversies she's stirred. It's not just about the tunes; it's about the culture and the costs that come with it.
Finally, we dive into the absurd world of political satire. Imagine Donald Trump as a bratty child in our skit "Little Donnie Trump," where he blames "little Joey Biden" for all his mischief. We'll laugh and critique the Trump family's legal troubles and explore speculative political scenarios with our signature blend of humor and insight. From Joe Biden's international blunders to amusing cardiac rehab stories and plans for a radio station, this episode is packed with wit, humor, and candid reflections that you won't want to miss.
Subscribe to 'The Original Canceled Radio Guys' . Go to https://www.ChrisandCostello.com
Email ChrisandCostello@Yahoo.com
Is Donald Trump really just a mischievous child trapped in an adult's body? Join us for a hilarious episode filled with wild stories and sharp satire as we kick off with Chris's terrifying hydroplaning incident on a Utah highway. From near-death experiences to beard grooming disasters and even a muscle tear that derailed his summer plans, Chris takes us on a rollercoaster ride of emotions. But don't worry, we lighten the mood with some laugh-out-loud moments about Chris's grooming mishaps and a brief but entertaining mention of Lizzo.
Next, we're hitting a nostalgic note as we reminisce about the good old days when concert tickets didn't require you to sell a kidney! We'll compare the affordable prices of legendary bands like the Rolling Stones to today's astronomical fees for stars like Olivia Rodrigo. Get ready for a candid take on Lizzo's appearance at the White House, her public persona, and the controversies she's stirred. It's not just about the tunes; it's about the culture and the costs that come with it.
Finally, we dive into the absurd world of political satire. Imagine Donald Trump as a bratty child in our skit "Little Donnie Trump," where he blames "little Joey Biden" for all his mischief. We'll laugh and critique the Trump family's legal troubles and explore speculative political scenarios with our signature blend of humor and insight. From Joe Biden's international blunders to amusing cardiac rehab stories and plans for a radio station, this episode is packed with wit, humor, and candid reflections that you won't want to miss.
Subscribe to 'The Original Canceled Radio Guys' . Go to https://www.ChrisandCostello.com
Email ChrisandCostello@Yahoo.com
Trump, trump, trump, diddly-dee, trump, trump, Trump, trump. It's all about Trump, diddle, whittle, piddle, dee-dee. Chris and Costello go overboard and are now serving four years with House Arreset, plus lots of other bits like how Chris nearly died on the highway. Again, lizzo makes a very brief appearance with her bananas, so enjoy the original cancelled Radio Guys feature film Trump and Chris and Costello Do enjoy.
Speaker 2:Hey, how's it going? This is Chris.
Speaker 3:Yeah, this is Costello. Not bad there, but I notice you're bandaged. What did you do this time? I've got a wounded wing, a wounded wing.
Speaker 2:Just give you a fair warning If it's raining, don't drive through Utah. No, if I get wet.
Speaker 2:Crappy bits of the roads there. But you know it's just, these are MSJ highways, right? So if there's rain, you know it's gonna drain, to mostly a degree. There might be a puddle here, a small puddle, not a friggin Lake Erie in the middle of the interstate on I-70. If you hit that I think I'm gonna like splash the water up and slow my car down and all that crap. No, you hit that and I start a hydro. I'm doing 75 miles an hour, man, and this thing's fish-tating like crazy. I'm going, I'm going, yeah, you do. You don't hit the brake, you try to just turn into it, get control of it. I'm going, come on, baby. Next thing, you know it spins. I'm going, I'm dangling, and then it spins me and dumps me in the freaking ditch in the medium, in the middle, and it lands hard like that and it starts spinning in the mud. Now I can see dirt and mud flying up everywhere. You know I'm going. When is this freaking car going to come to a stop?
Speaker 2:I finally stopped and I was in this covered mud and I kind of limped up to a service road and there's nobody around, just me In mud, and I kind of limped up to a service road and there's nobody around, just me, the middle of the street, probably about 8,000 feet up, and I get out and look at this covered mud and the bumper's broken. There's big grass and sticks and mud sticking out of the back. The wheel's bent on the back right tire. I'm going. That one's screwed. You know the undercarriage is all screwed up. So I get up, I'm going.
Speaker 5:I, I get up, I'm going. Man, I'm sober. The thing is I just remember one thing I'm trying to gain control of the car right.
Speaker 2:You push hard to stir, you're trying hard to work it. Right, I heard a pop. You know, I guess I've never heard a pop in my body before, right, I guess. If you hear a pop, that's it and you think, okay, broke the bone. Because it was my left arm, which I broke in four different places when I was a kid. I thought, oh, maybe it's just fragile. I popped the bone or I, you know, I ripped the tendon. Yeah, I didn't know. I did like a mother. Yes, I let it go and when I got home two days later started to swell up like an elephant, you know. And they tell me I tore a muscle. I tore a muscle apart. It's just the weirdest feeling. That pop is either bone, tendon or muscle, and muscle is the best way to go. Apparently, you know, it didn't require surgery, just some physical therapy, and it's going to be like this for two months, which means my summer golf tour is screwed because I can't play golf with a left arm. It won't do crap, you know.
Speaker 3:You have to check out fishing. That's it. You can do that.
Speaker 2:I can do that. I feel like I have to dip shit. I've never had my car. I'm a really good driver. I never do that. I feel like that's a dipshit. I've never had you know, never had my car. I'm a really good driver. I never had that. I like driving fast. I like I was kind of exciting actually.
Speaker 3:Well, you can always tell the professionals from the amateurs, can't you? You know how.
Speaker 2:Well, I didn't, I didn't kill myself, I didn't hurt anybody else. My car's not my car's repaired, already ready to go. Go back to.
Speaker 3:Utah. You can tell the professionals, because they're the ones that go Whee.
Speaker 2:Well, it was kind of fun, I must admit. See, as long as you know in your head like you're going to be okay, it's kind of going. Okay, I'm spinning, I'm going, if I spin to the right, I'm going. Okay, I'm spinning, I'm going if I spin to the right.
Speaker 5:I'm 8,000 feet square straight up. What's?
Speaker 2:to the right. There he said spin me to the left. I'm going to go in the medium, ditch in the middle. So luckily that's where it took me, Instead of over there.
Speaker 3:Good old Utah, Nothing like that place. I'll tell you.
Speaker 2:I think they do that. The Mormons do that on purpose, just for those Christian people like me who drive through will get a wreck and just wipe them out. You're a non-Mormon, You're a non-white guy.
Speaker 3:You're a funny-looking guy. See, I noticed you I am Caucasian, they go.
Speaker 2:You don't look Caucasian, I'm tan, it's June, okay.
Speaker 3:No, no. Well, at least See that.
Speaker 2:I quit coloring my beard.
Speaker 3:I thought you just shaved it. Okay, well done.
Speaker 2:No, it's just white yeah that's what you need.
Speaker 3:A bit of salt and pepper, like you know. You were saying what pepper?
Speaker 2:It's all freaking salt Shit. You know you were saying um what pepper? It's all freaking salt shit.
Speaker 3:we can pepper you know I I would have had a red beard which is kind of weird way back when, but obviously then it came out dark and later I haven't seen you grow anything.
Speaker 2:You should let. You should let it grow.
Speaker 3:Let's see what it looks like I did a couple, uh, couple years ago. How was it? I couldn't stand it, I couldn't stand it, I couldn't stand it. Why, I don't know. It just didn't feel clean. And I'm always doing this.
Speaker 2:Once again, this is a sign of like I'm thinking.
Speaker 3:Well, yeah, I'm smart.
Speaker 2:I'm thinking, I'm philosophizing, I'm thinking of something important Not really. That'll leave the cat in the washing machine, not really. Then I'll leave the cat in the washing machine Shit, let me get him out. It's a good idea. You can do shaving, though. I mean there's a break from shaving in this anyway right.
Speaker 3:Well, I shave probably every other day and I do it in the shower. I haven't used a mirror in years because I don't like mirrors. I just don't.
Speaker 5:That's just the way it scares you.
Speaker 2:Well, yes there's not, I'll get married one day and just go. Good, that's how it's me.
Speaker 3:That's why I don't like videos either. It's not vanity, it's just sanity.
Speaker 2:You just don't like video, that's for sure. So I mean, I grew this so I could give myself a break from shaving. Then I wind up having to color this twice a week because the gray came out so fast. I'm going. I got to have a break somewhere so I quit coloring. You know, it's like you wait, I'll let it grow a little bit longer. It's like I trimmed it this morning. I was looking pretty ho-ho-hoey. You know it was like dang, I can't get a break.
Speaker 3:No, I think it looks better not being darkened, because I mean it's kind of obvious when you've got no grey at all. What's obvious over 35?
Speaker 2:I don't know, I've seen, maybe so.
Speaker 4:I've got to give in sometime.
Speaker 2:I did a week ago. I did the Botox thing up here, can you see it? I pulled a bit too much up here for, and for a couple of days I got droop eye. You know I'm walking around.
Speaker 3:You see that he had a stroke.
Speaker 2:It's one of the two, yeah many stroke yeah, so it was like that it's for a couple of days it saddles, but it's like you notice here, take a look here, gus, see between here. See any wrinkles up there. Yeah, look how smooth that is. Huh, nope, take that out, baby. Look how smooth that is.
Speaker 3:See, I got one that goes straight down there like that.
Speaker 2:Boink. No, my daughter's got that. She got like a big straight vein that goes in. But yeah, this has smooth much better that way it is the cheapest alternative, that's for sure.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, and it was Trader Joe's. So I'm actually recycling, which makes me feel better, you know. So, of course, now I understand. I'll just click the lead on this because I think it's time we should Jennifer Lopez man, tell me about.
Speaker 2:We should do a survey real quick who feels sorry and who feels bad for Jennifer Lopez? You know why. You know why? Because she's so driven I still have to be relevant, I still have to be in news all the time. It's got to be me, me, me. Everyone's sick of her. You know, you're over 50. You still look good for your age and stuff. Be happy, you got money, you got your boyfriend back, you remarried. Then you know, I mean, just enjoy, just pick your project sparingly and do it that way instead of like in your face, your face, every day.
Speaker 2:So she put about 20 million dollars in her own money in a stupid project. This is me now. This is me then. This is me with ben. This is this. This is the concert. This is me. Live well, all the concerts are canceled. All her her albums a flop. Her documentaries a flop. Her movies a flop. Her husband's pissed because he wrote these letters love letters to her and he kept them in like a binder. They called it the Ben and Jen Bible. It was just him. He gave to her. She took that book of letters down to the producer of her documentary and let him read them and then they started putting them into the show. He was like freaking mortified that she would do that.
Speaker 2:I would be too. Poor Vinette, that's such a personal thing. It's like what the hell's wrong with this woman? These are trying. They're living separately for the moment. They're going to break. They're going to try to make it work. She's canceled a tour she said to be with friends and family. You're damn right. You better hang out with family and just try to save things, couldn't?
Speaker 3:Yeah, you better hang out with the people you didn't mention in your little love letters.
Speaker 2:You know how it goes. You have your career. You have a period where you're really hot and she's doing a couple of hot albums, some rom-com movies. She's the shit. It lasts for about 10, 15 years. Then things start to cool and you take different roles. Well, she was trying to stay the same as she was during that period of hotness. Some people just have trouble letting it go. Things change. Brad Pitt's 60 now. I mean you know he's doing more behind-the-scenes stuff, executive producing and directing things like that, instead of like I've got to be here for a little time, just chill man.
Speaker 3:Yeah, well that's what it's about man Enjoy life, and you know it's.
Speaker 2:But yeah, Wouldn't you like to have a break from Jennifer Lopez? Isn't it going to be nice not to see her this summer, though I hope it stays that way.
Speaker 3:Wouldn't that be great? It would be. It would be. You know, the ticket I wanted and I dropped the word in my door.
Speaker 2:Harry.
Speaker 3:Swift. Huh, harry Swift.
Speaker 2:That that.
Speaker 3:Harry Swift. I do, I do that. Actually, it was the Rolling Stones in Vegas, between $70 and $100 for a ticket. $70 and $100, yeah, in a small venue. I'm not sure which venue. It's probably House of Blues or something like that. Well, I can't imagine because I've seen them live a couple of times.
Speaker 2:Unless you're like a big, major superstar people so far for this summer ticket sales not only for Jennifer Lopez canceled tour are down everywhere because they're charging so much money Like, say, you want to go see Olivia Rodrigo? Okay, she's young, she's out of Utah, she did Drive in the Rain, obviously you know 22. But you know her least expensive ticket to see Olivia Rodrigo, who's got maybe two CDs to her name, two or three is $408.
Speaker 6:I mean, he's freaking nuts.
Speaker 2:Who's going to do that? Well, apparently people are fed up and they're not buying.
Speaker 3:I don't buy it.
Speaker 2:Ticket sales. Unless you're like the Stones, which is like legendary, it's like you want to go because you're going who's going to drop dead next? So I gotta go see him now, you know you pay for that it's true, but are you 400 for olivia rodrigo? No, not yet. I mean, that's like the price of eating a taylor swift ticket and that, that's that's that's ridiculous.
Speaker 3:I mean mean, that's stupid. Do you know what? Now, this is going back a long time ago, early 70s. I went to the London Rock and Roll Show. It was the second show I'd ever been to. In that show they had Bo Diddley, Chuck Berry, Jerry Lee Lewis, who's why I really went to go see him. So that's those three. Oh, Bill Haley and his Comets.
Speaker 3:He was still alive then, and you said you'd go see a 50 show or something. Is that what it was? It was the London Rock and Roll Show. So they had this brief resurgence of all the old rock and rollers and it was in Wembley Stadium and it was brilliant because Chuck Berry and Little Rich were fighting as to who should have top billing. This other guy called Screaming Lord Such who's well, you've got to go a ways back to find anything by him. Anyway, he got arrested because he has a stripper on stage and there's actually a bit of him there. He turns around and says okay, dear, go ahead, take him off. So she does, and she gets arrested.
Speaker 2:I remember that that's fun stuff. Let me guess the ticket was what? $10 or something like that, not even it was a couple of shillings. Wow.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I know I mean. Okay, they weren't all top ten artists, but they were just a few years ago. I'm trying to remember who else was I mean?
Speaker 2:For those who don't know, a couple of shillings in US dollars is $500. Oh man, what is a shilling equal to a dollar? Is a shilling like oh well, 5p.
Speaker 3:5 cents, 10 cents, 10 cents. What?
Speaker 2:A dime. You went to see that rock and roll show and you paid a dime for all those people About 75 cents Holy crap.
Speaker 3:I know it's incredible Three and six.
Speaker 2:Summer tours used to be where artists they didn't become relevant again, but you had to see people you remember, you grew up with and stuff, and they had fair ticket prices and they would travel with two or three other bands of the same era, you know, and you could go see your favorite bands, four or five of them, good hip music, and the tickets were all under $100, you know, this is just up to last year and a year ago.
Speaker 3:I was going to say they still do that. You go to some of the smaller areas, particularly around here, and you'll find these people go. Oh my God, I remember them. They're playing Greenville, you go see them.
Speaker 2:there's only one original member left up there, yeah exactly. He was like the flute player and stuff who the hell is that guy? Were left up there. Yeah, exactly, he was like the flute player. You know stuff like that. Who the hell is that guy?
Speaker 3:There was. They had Bill Haley and his Comets at Bally's for a while.
Speaker 2:The only guy out there was the Comet.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and I said, well, who's the exactly, who's the Comet? And the drummer stood up. He said, well, I used to sit in with them occasionally. That's, that's about it. You're not even on my comments.
Speaker 2:Like you've got an 80s concert with like four or five 80s bands. They're in the 200, 300 level now as well too. They're just going. Look what everybody else is doing. Let's give it a go, Because they're playing smaller venues, like 3,000 people or so. So they raise their price and people just aren't buying. It's a lot of money, man, People just aren't buying it.
Speaker 3:It's a lot of money. Man Fluck of Seagulls was playing. I can't remember where that was, but I thought that was interesting. They're doing a tour, hey, and you know who was in the White House? Our good friend Lizzo, the original cancelled radio guide. That's a good thing. They shouldn't stick it up her ass, isn't it? I mean, you know, up her vagina. That was coming next.
Speaker 7:Oh was it really, oh, I've been cancelled. Chris and Costello's podcast, the original cancelled radio guys, why?
Speaker 3:They had a buffet there or something I'm sure that they did. They needed to get rid of the stuff that Trump had left behind.
Speaker 2:McDonald's hamburgers everywhere, yeah.
Speaker 3:I guess she'd been booked before she quit. It's the presidential honors or something.
Speaker 2:We keep getting shit all the time because we made fun of Lizzo, I think for a short period of time she goes, I'm going to work on my weight, and then she goes. Well, fuck it. You know, I have a body shaming me and I'm I'm standing up for people like me. Well, what we always said was OK, lizzo, you are a fat pig. But we did say that I did. I didn't like her. I think she's funny, I think she's talented, but the thing is, it's not body shaming. I mean, you're stupid, you want to be that heavy, you're going to get diabetes, You're going to get heart disease You're going to die young.
Speaker 2:I mean that's stupid. That ain't body shaming. That's being stupid.
Speaker 3:Well, you don't realize it until you're older, how quick life goes.
Speaker 2:Do what these two people you're looking at are doing.
Speaker 3:You're looking at two guys on Ozempic. Oh yeah, yes, indeed, friday's Ozempic Day.
Speaker 2:How long have you been on Ozempic now, costello? It'll be a month. You're not at the level yet where you start to lose weight, yet Maybe a little bit.
Speaker 3:I've also. I'm down to 230-something. 230've lost. I'm down to 230 something.
Speaker 2:From 230 something right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I mean I was 245 something before. Okay, I have lost some weight. I'm sure that if I exercise more, I will probably lose even more.
Speaker 2:That just makes it, just enhance, it makes it happen even faster, you know. But when you hit month two, when your dosage goes up a little bit, that's when things start to kind of really drop off.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I have to see the lovely doctor sometime this week, I think.
Speaker 2:Okay, get that weight check. But if you want to go see a good show this summer, you know, I would highly recommend. The group has put out the hottest summer single. I'm talking about, of course, the Kristen Costello singers okay. A summer single? I'm talking about, of course, the Chris and Costello Singers okay. And today we're going to introduce our brand new song, the Chris and Costello Singers. And toward the summer, unconvictable.
Speaker 3:That's what they said. Who is this about, Chris? I have no idea Unconvictable.
Speaker 7:We were misled.
Speaker 3:It's not the royal family, is it? I don't think so. All his statements were gaslighting us.
Speaker 2:Now that his guilt is uniting, us Got me.
Speaker 3:Never before has someone been more.
Speaker 5:Thank you.
Speaker 2:Unelectable More every day. That's no lie. I need a cigarette.
Speaker 3:Those that we deplore.
Speaker 5:Will fade away. Been waiting for you Hit that note.
Speaker 3:That's why, Donald, it's delectable that someone so disrespectful has become so unelectable too.
Speaker 4:No, no, I see him Mama.
Speaker 3:Would you care for this dance, Mr Bailey?
Speaker 2:I'm going to be you. Yes, A quick twirl.
Speaker 3:Oh, and it's over. Somebody needs a little lesson in how to edit Okay.
Speaker 2:This is a quick little version for our audience. Ladies and gentlemen, there we go, our latest hit, the Kristen Costello Singers. I hope you enjoyed that. Very good indeed, very tasteful, very well done indeed.
Speaker 3:Very goodful, very well done, indeed, very good, rather. Yes, yes, yes, I did get that fucking pen to work eventually, so that rather helped.
Speaker 2:Coming up next will be our follow-up song. It's the sentencing. Oh yeah, we can hardly wait.
Speaker 3:Well, we'll have to be penning that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we'll have to work on that. Put his ass in jail, he'll be fresh bait.
Speaker 3:He can throw away that key.
Speaker 2:This is too much fun. I mean the quick question mark is.
Speaker 3:That'll be unforgettable. Have you noticed? Have you seen pictures of him when he was a little boy we're talking about? I guess you might have figured out what we're talking about Trump, and of course, our Arab friends know who he is.
Speaker 2:but they're trying to divert the attention because the Hunter Biden trial started today too. But you've got to remember the Hunter. Biden trial. You've got to remember the Hunter Biden trial is not President Biden. Okay, it's his son. It's like any kid you do your best, you raise him, things happen, it's not on him. Of course, we're probably going to try to make it say look, he's crooked too, it's his son. It's not the president, okay, it's a big difference. All right, looking forward to the sentencing on July the 11th.
Speaker 3:That'll be a good day, but you, you know, I saw a picture actually of little Donnie Trump. It is an actual picture of him. And you know, his mouth is round, I guess they realize he's round for the rest of his life. I don't know.
Speaker 2:What do you think that is? What do you think goes in there?
Speaker 3:Well, that's like I said, a good little cocksucker.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not Oscar Mayer Sure.
Speaker 3:Everything's too small on him.
Speaker 2:Well, with him it all started as a kid, anyway, Even as little Donnie. He was a turd, you know.
Speaker 3:Yes, yes, and we found this shall we?
Speaker 2:It's another episode of Little Donnie Trump. This is where it all began as a brat. Welcome of Little Donnie Trump. This is where it all began as a brat.
Speaker 5:Welcome to Little Donnie Trump. Now let's join the Trump family in their home in 1951.
Speaker 6:Okay, children, today we're going to learn about the alphabet. I'm going to teach you all of the letters of the uh, you, oh, god, what?
Speaker 4:does that smell? Uh, teacher, it wasn't me, it must've been some other kid. Well, you're very quick to deny it's you, little Donnie, but I'm standing right next to you and it smells like you pooped your pants. No, teacher, I've never pooped in my pants, like no one ever didn't poop in their pants before, and everybody knows it. This their pants before, and everybody knows it. This is a hoax, okay little Donnie, you've lied enough.
Speaker 6:I'm calling your mommy to come get you Fake news, Fake poop Fred little Donnie was sent home from kindergarten again today.
Speaker 7:Oh no, what's he done this?
Speaker 6:time dear. Well, he pooped his pants for one thing, but as bad as it was and it was really horrific, that's not the worst of it. He lied and blamed another kid for doing it.
Speaker 7:What do you mean, dear?
Speaker 6:He told the teacher that his classmate little Joey Biden, took a shit in little Donnie's pants to make little Donnie look bad. It's such an obvious and ridiculous lie that I don't even know where to start.
Speaker 7:And let me guess he's sticking to his ridiculous story and refuses to admit he pooped his own pants.
Speaker 6:Yes, fred, this child's ludicrous lies are driving me to drink.
Speaker 7:Well then, I guess it's time for me and little Donnie to have a little chat. Here we go. Little Donnie, you and I need to talk. Your mother tells me you got sent home from kindergarten again for pooping in your pants.
Speaker 4:Oh, shut the fuck up, dad, I didn't poop in my pants. Little Joey Biden did it. This is a witch hunt and a fraud and a scam.
Speaker 7:Now, little Donnie, you know that's ridiculous and nobody believes. Another kid somehow managed to poop in your pants.
Speaker 4:Dad, this is just another hoax. First there was poopy pants hoax number one. Now there's poopy pants hoax number two. I'm telling you, little Joey Biden pooped in my pants because he hates little Donnie Trump.
Speaker 7:Well, little Donnie, your story is incredibly stupid and your relentless denials are hilariously fucked up, but I'm proud of you, son. Lying and blaming others, even in the face of obvious culpability, is the Trump family way. And oh my God, what is that awful smell?
Speaker 4:That's a dad. Little Joey Biden just pooped in my pants again.
Speaker 5:Here's a highlight from next week's episode.
Speaker 7:Mrs Trump, we need you to come pick up little Donnie. He's pooped his pants again for the third time this week, and it's only Tuesday.
Speaker 5:Be sure to tune in next week for another episode of Little Donnie Trump.
Speaker 3:Yeah, don't forget folks, Little Donnie Trump, I wonder. Number four will probably be, like you said, conviction, conviction.
Speaker 2:There you go, ladies and gentlemen. That's the Chris and Costello Players. We'll have another episode for you next week, okay?
Speaker 3:Amazing. Our players are really God. They're so talented. They just send me these things. It's great. No pun are really God. They're so talented, they just send me these things, it's great.
Speaker 2:No pun intended, but I'm smelling Grammy Award here, I'm smelling an Emmy.
Speaker 3:I'm smelling an.
Speaker 2:Oscar, I'm just smelling the shit in his pants. Is what I'm smelling.
Speaker 3:We could get a lovey. A lovey which is the Internet Awards. Now.
Speaker 2:I think you leak that a little bit. A little turd. Every time, every guilty, all 34 of them, guilty, yeah, guilty, oh, guilty, oh good.
Speaker 3:Oh guilty. I wonder if they, you know if they did put him in jail, which I think is very unlikely now.
Speaker 2:It's very unlikely. Yeah, yeah, I think it happened.
Speaker 3:But if they put a gag order on him and if they put a say like a house arrest, I mean, that's the thing I hope they do a home confinement.
Speaker 2:He can't go out and do one of his stupid-ass rallies, you know, right, with the third-grade followers he's got and Millennium's going to be going. I'm going on vacation in Europe for a while until that damn ankle bracelet comes off, you know, or until he stops breathing.
Speaker 3:I have honestly woken up for the last. What 12 years now wishing every morning that when I turn on the news it'll be Trump died last night from an overdose of chicken nuggets. But you know, I think we might be getting. Well, we're obviously getting closer.
Speaker 2:The scary part I think, is that I mean, they're just naturally they. They eat like crap. He's overweight, oh he's terrible. I think his dad lived to be in his 90s or something. So I mean I'm going God if he follows in those footsteps, holy crap. Yeah, I know, I'm going to marry this guy, you know.
Speaker 3:But his dad was a felt, relatively healthy-looking man, whereas Donnie Jr here is Living off Kentucky Fried Chicken. He ain't 230 pounds anymore. That's damn sure Not even close.
Speaker 2:He never walked. He's a tall guy, but he's a big boy, though he's a pig boy.
Speaker 3:Pig boy, Come on. Pig boy, Squeal boy.
Speaker 2:I mean they're all 34 of those Guilties. You can just see the little shit come out each time he did guilty.
Speaker 3:I have to say this you know maybe some of our listeners are going why are you going on about Trump and all that? You have to realize that this is a huge mark in history. You know they haven't exactly been letting off fireworks or anything yet, but one way or the other this will be remembered in history for maybe 200 years, maybe more, maybe less, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, we were just kind of going along as a country pretty good until he ran for president and he won for president. Yeah, things have changed. We were short of temper with people. We called people names. We never did before. He wasn't there for the transfer of power. It's never happened before. From one outgoing president to a new president, he refused to go the riots. I just take these things off of my finger. I'm just going God, all this history and tradition we have, which is nothing like you guys got in Europe. But we're trying and it's all screwed up. If he wins again, it's going to be even worse this time. So it's the revenge tour, you know yeah yeah, I just wonder you know I mean it's ridiculous.
Speaker 3:I mean, and then you know, if they stopped for five minutes and thought wait a minute, this man has absolutely no platform to stand on. We don't even know who his VP is, which he should have. Oh, I guess that would be at this next big rally thing that's coming up, which is on the 11th as well, isn't it?
Speaker 2:I guess it's not going to be called the dog killer anymore, so I don't know who it's going to be. It really doesn't matter.
Speaker 3:Well, yeah, exactly, it doesn't matter. So for all our listeners we kind of apologize, but consider this historic. Okay, because it is. I mean, nothing's been as stupid as this ever Ever. I'm surprised. I mean nothing's been as stupid as this ever ever. I'm surprised.
Speaker 2:I hate to say it, but I'm surprised there's that many Americans who are that freaking stupid who would vote for a self-centered, me, me, me, idiot, psychotic guy like that. It's just scary, you know, I understand. If you want other things changes, just go with the. Just follow the policies. Okay, I mean I wish we had a younger guy than Biden. That would be great, but it's just not the case right now. You have to look at it no matter what you want, it's going to be those two guys and you have to pick one of those two guys.
Speaker 3:Well, maybe, unless, of course, something does happen to Trump. But I mean, this is the strangest thing. You've basically got one guy standing for election because I mean Trump, he shouldn't be eligible, although they say he might be, or he is right.
Speaker 2:I mean this is Well, he can still run right now. He hasn't been convicted of a federal crime yet, so he's not going to get those trials before election day. So that's a federal crime yet. So they're not going to get those trials before Election Day. That's a moot point.
Speaker 3:Anyway, he's going to have to lose based on what's happened so far.
Speaker 2:They have a debate, don't forget they actually have a debate at the end of this month. This is really early for a debate.
Speaker 3:This should be fun, but no, he's a felon now. Those were felons, yeah he's a felon.
Speaker 2:Now, those were felons. Yeah, he is a felon. We got songs for felons. We got so much material coming your way. You guys just get used to it. Okay, we got so much stuff coming. I'm looking at our video thing here on our podcast. I feel like one of those idiots on the Fox talking thing where they got all the talking heads there going, you know.
Speaker 3:So we have this presser from his press conference today and it was an hour of just stupid bullshit and we love bullshit, so here we go.
Speaker 8:The judge was a tyrant and you got to see that with Bob Costello. A fine man. I've never seen anything like it, and you got to see that with Bob Costello. A fine man Yep got to be. I've never seen anything like it, and neither has anybody that was in that courthouse where he demanded that the courthouse be cleared. Now the good news is most of the people in the courthouse were the media and anybody that was in the media of your affair. You'll say, wow, that was anger, that was crazed, he was crazed.
Speaker 3:Well, he should know about that, shouldn't he?
Speaker 2:He's sounding tired, older and angry, you know, and he's making fun of a judge who hasn't sentenced him yet and anything he says could affect his sentencing. So I say to him please keep it up.
Speaker 3:Oh, it's too good to be true.
Speaker 2:You couldn't write it. Call in some more, David. Let's hear some more. This is too good.
Speaker 3:It's sheer anger. It's sheer anger, and so he continued.
Speaker 8:And the reason that Bob Costello acted a little bit upset which I think he has a right to, acted a little bit upset, which I think he has a right to was that every question he was being asked was being objected to by the other side and sustained by the judge Sustained, sustained, sustained. I think he did it many times, I don't know what the number. Many times Even I was sitting there saying and these were basic questions and I never saw anybody treated that way by a judge and I've been treated very badly by two other judges also.
Speaker 3:Two other judges. Yeah, he's been treated so badly? I'm starting to feel sorry for him.
Speaker 2:You know what? His biggest problem with this judge is? The judge's first name, Juan. That's his problem, oh yeah.
Speaker 8:Think about it Yep, yep, yep yep, yep, yep, carry on, it's all right carry on out of the white house crooked joe biden, the worst president in the history of our country. He's the worst president in the history of our country the most incompetent. He's the dumbest president we've ever had. Oh yeah, Is he talking about himself? I think so yeah. Most incompetent president and he's the most dishonest president we've ever had. The judge was a tyrant there you go Call him a name again.
Speaker 2:Good.
Speaker 3:Good. So here's the thing. Right, here's the thing. There's a thing called mirroring, which is a little hard to say, but it's true, it's a psychiatrist's term. The people who do these things then just turn around and stick it on the other person, and I had an ex who did that and said wait a minute. These are all the things I said to you.
Speaker 2:I think he's forgetting as well too. Like this is like American democracy you sit there calling out the judge, this all these guilty birds came from a jury, a jury selected by both sides in partial jury. So it's not the judge, it's not the Democrats, it's a jury. That's what it's all about. And they found you guilty. When he's going do you? How you do this to me? Oh so you're. You don't you break the law, but you're not supposed to get in trouble for it while the rest of us do so. That's a. He's shocked. It happened to him. What a freaking idiot.
Speaker 8:Okay, go ahead he comes in and he approves it and he gets three and a half million, meaning three and a half million is paid to the family his family from the mayor of Moscow's wife.
Speaker 3:I don't know what he's talking about. What are you talking about?
Speaker 8:He wants to talk about it. Trump's a very big danger to our country, you are. The only way they think they can win this election is by doing exactly what they're doing right now win it in the courts, because they can't win it at the ballot box. Dead, he comes in and he approves it. Oh sorry.
Speaker 3:It's actually.
Speaker 8:I don't know. It's something where I'm wired in such a way that a lot of people would have gone away a long time ago. They would have gone away after impeachment hoax number one. That was a total hoax. Great support from the Republican Party, though. Then you had impeachment hoax number two, and then they formed the committee. How about they form the committee of thugs, the J6 committee of thugs, the J6 committee of thugs?
Speaker 3:Okay, I can't.
Speaker 2:I can't take much more. People go to rallies and he spews the same shit and they sit there and cheer this crap on he rambles. He makes no sense. If it's against him's evil, it's bad. You know well.
Speaker 3:Like I said, meet him good everybody else evil, you know, and even though I've done it, you did it before me, so that makes it worse. Because you really did it, although you said you didn't because you didn't. And because you did it means that means that I did. But I'm not going to tell you that, because if I tell you that, that'll mean that I did do it, but I didn't. Honestly I didn't, it wasn't me.
Speaker 2:You should be happy. You're making absolutely no frigging sense, just like him. I don't know what the fuck you're saying.
Speaker 3:Well, here's the crux. It was somebody else, it was Joe Biden. That's right. It was Joe Biden and his wife who did all these things, because all the Republican people, they're all behind me, they all love me. That's a good point.
Speaker 2:He goes that Biden was the mastermind behind all this. On one end of the scale, he goes he's a senile old fool who's dumb and can't do anything, but on the other hand, he's smart enough to come up with this whole big scheme to put your ass in jail. You know you contradict yourself. I mean, you just back right into it, buddy, you back right into that one. So yeah, it's all crooked. Joe Biden came up with this whole thing.
Speaker 3:Oh, yeah, yeah, he made it. Let's also cast the time back a little bit further and I need to do a little bit of research on this before I get into it. But do you remember the many trips he made abroad and the faux pas that he made, other than stealing from Buckingham Palace? I think it was? Yeah, yeah, yeah, stealing stuff from there? He had to return it, also touching the Queen. God rest their soul.
Speaker 2:You don't do that, I mean, I think that was the one time the queen actually shit her pants. It was going to be hey, judge Ew.
Speaker 3:If one must. If one must, I mean, that was when it was still semi-lucent, at least, but oh my. And then, of course, they had the flying Trump out there, which we saw.
Speaker 2:That was the funniest damn thing I've ever seen. I love that. Whoever came up with that was great.
Speaker 3:And then he goes to North Korea North Korea, not South Korea. North Korea has a private conversation with King Jong-un, which is I can't remember which one it is, but the one who's I mean he locks the doors, doesn't even have a guy from the Secret Service or the Foreign Office there, nobody. And who knows what he promised. I think he was trying to buy beachfront property personally.
Speaker 2:I think if Kim Jong-un had any balls about him, he could have wiped him out right then. All of a sudden, north Korea would have been America's favorite allied country.
Speaker 3:Yes, yeah, they missed that opportunity.
Speaker 2:We'd have had a parade down Fifth Avenue in New York. Kim Jong-un, our hero.
Speaker 3:Well, you know, putin could have done the same thing. When they had their little Tate art set, they were buddies and whisper, whisper.
Speaker 2:This guy's too much fun. We're going to have fun with this puppet. Let him run, let him go, give him all the milk he wants, let him up in the room. There at Red Square they get that golden showers going, you know.
Speaker 3:I'll just ring my depends out over you, okay.
Speaker 2:This is going to be our next Kristen Costello singer song the golden showers.
Speaker 3:Golden showers for little Donnie.
Speaker 2:Lyrics are dancing in my head already.
Speaker 3:Oh, good, do write them down.
Speaker 2:Do you want to play more of this nonsense, or have you heard enough?
Speaker 3:Oh, I really have had enough.
Speaker 2:I think we all have Screw that stuff Before we wrap up the show. I forgot to ask you, costello. So what's new in your life? So I had a car accident, scared the shit out of me At the time. Halfway through I started going. I'm kind of having fun with this. I'm just kind of like it's kind of funny. I was spinning around so fast I wasn't quite sure if I was going to wind up pointing at a truck. I'm going to be going over the ditch, I'm going to drop 8,000 feet, but it was exhilarating. I didn't shit my pants. I didn't do that either. I exhilarating, you know. So I didn't shit my pants and do that either.
Speaker 3:So I enjoyed it Well, that's a good thing. I'm glad to hear that.
Speaker 2:And my car survived. So what's new with?
Speaker 3:you. So what's new? Well, you know what a crazy dizzy life I have been having for a while. Let me see Rehab. That's a blast.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's so much fun. You have to explain that when you have rehab, you can do rehab as many things. You can be in rehab because you have an alcohol addiction problem. You can be in rehab because you're a sex addict. You can be in rehab because you have a thing for goats. I mean, it's just like.
Speaker 3:My rehab is cardiac rehab. Ah, for the old heart and all the bits around it. When you go to cardiac rehab, what is it?
Speaker 2:that you do? What do you do? What do they make you do?
Speaker 3:Not much. I sit on these machines for five minutes.
Speaker 2:You do cardio machines, that's it.
Speaker 3:A cardio machine is one of those things you sit on and it's like a bicycle. You don't go anywhere, you just you know. And then there's another one that you use your arms and your legs, then there's another one that you use just your legs in a slightly different manner. So that's three machines, and then you're supposed to walk around the room for five minutes.
Speaker 2:I hope your insurance is paying for that.
Speaker 3:Oh hell, yeah, they better be, because I sure as hell wouldn't pay for this. I'd sleep with you, bullshit.
Speaker 2:It probably would have made sense more if you'd done the rehab after the surgery, because then you've got to build things back up.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah. No, I'm way past that I might just say.
Speaker 2:You're a little bit late to the party. You're behind. You're like held back a grade, you know.
Speaker 3:Yeah, at least that was the insurance people. Oh well, you know, hey, I get out of the house, I get to watch the old folks with their oxygen tanks walk around the room.
Speaker 2:Oh, so you meet some hot babes at rehab. Oh yeah. Well, the nurses are cute. I always like the ones that walk around with the oxygen tanks. They got the tank they're pulling in the right hand by holding a cigarette in the left hand.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that used to be in Vegas. That was at Sunrise Hospital always.
Speaker 2:I see it all the time. I'm just going. Let me just take it a little bit closer. Do us all a favor.
Speaker 3:Just go up in flames. You know, up there you go, well that. And then you have to go in and have a little talk and about. Actually today was quite interesting, but, um, there's nothing that I really didn't know before, and not that I know everything, but after a certain point you kind of get to know stuff and um, and that's it, and it goes on ten weeks.
Speaker 2:I'm happy that you now know stuff. That's important. I know stuff. I know stuff. I'll be spending the week here in Colorado doing a couple of things and off to have the cancer survivors party I go to every year. It's this weekend. I'm in Vail Looking forward to that, and then from there I'll head back to Vegas for a couple of weeks.
Speaker 3:Of work, whatever. Actually back to Vegas for a couple weeks Of work, whatever. You know what. The gray beard looks pretty good, Matt, now that the lines have changed.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to get used to it. If I wasn't tan, I think I would look pretty Weird. That's what I would look like. I heard the good word, yeah. I guess I could Come on let it grow, costello, let's do it, let's do no shaming.
Speaker 3:That's like three weeks for me. That's about three weeks growth for me. Let it go.
Speaker 2:Let's see what you get. All right. All right, we will, we will. Let's check it out, let it grow.
Speaker 3:We need to give people a reason to listen to this podcast.
Speaker 2:I know we've done the Trump thing.
Speaker 3:I just think the more we cover, our faces up, the higher chance we have of getting more views on TikTok.
Speaker 2:Look at this guy, Jesus, they're probably going. Kristen Costello, the original canceled ugly radio guys, and so well you know.
Speaker 3:You know, perhaps next week we could do our own personal top fives, like we were supposed to do for this week. But hey, who knew, Trump was going to take over everything.
Speaker 2:Well, it's out of our system, at least for this week, so we'll do that stuff next week. So next week we'll be back to original programming, okay, oh whoa, hey, beautiful downtown Burbank, that's right original programming with Kristen Costello next week. I did enjoy the Kristen Costello singers and the Kristen Costello players. That's true, very good. The only boring part of the show was playing the actual Trump press conference from the Trump Tower. That sucked, yeah, because it was actually done by him. We should have had the Kristen Costello players do the press conference our way.
Speaker 3:Well, you know what?
Speaker 5:What.
Speaker 3:Well, you know what, what we can edit here? You, having said that, now gives me the right to get the edit tool out.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, he's going to whip out the edit tool. Last time we did that, he had to spend six months in the city jail. That's right.
Speaker 3:Yes, yes, indeed. Well, I'll tell you what.
Speaker 2:Hey want to see my edit tool. Here it is. I got your edit tool right there, that's it.
Speaker 3:You squeal at the pain.
Speaker 2:Hey, spank my tool. Go on hit it, Spank that tool.
Speaker 3:Hey, listen, folks who are still actually at this end of the podcast, which is pretty amazing don't forget to subscribe. You don't have to pay, Just subscribe so we know you're there. Okay, We'd appreciate that.
Speaker 2:Appreciate that. Yeah, we would. We're worldwide folks, chris and Kat's Social worldwide. Wherever you get your podcasts at, you will find us. Okay, we'll be the ones screaming yes.
Speaker 3:Soon we will have our very own radio station, station Trump. No, it won't be that, that's for sure. The original canceled radio, there you go. We could save an awful lot on printing, definitely so. So what's the word to finish it off there? Bailey, you know I.
Speaker 2:Gigolo.
Speaker 3:Gigolo J-Lo, oh, j-lo, oh. Okay, bye, j-lo.