The Original canceled radio guys. Chris and Costello: SEASON 6
Beards, Bars, and Biden: Hilarious Prison Realities, Prostate Tales, and Family Feuds
Ever wondered what life is really like behind the bars of a "fancy" prison? Strap in for a hilarious and revealing episode as Gustavo and I share stories that range from beard debates to the realities of federal incarceration. Along the way, we break down myths about so-called luxurious prisons and offer a firsthand account of the strict rules and harsh conditions that define life in a federal camp. Plus, hear our thoughts on Hunter Biden's recent conviction, and get a sneak peek at an exclusive interview that promises to delve into his state of mind post-verdict.
But that's not all—this episode is packed with laughter and life lessons. We tackle the awkwardness of full physical exams, including a prostate check that left me reflecting on the LGBTQ+ experience. Gustavo shares his struggles with car repairs following an accident, and we both chuckle over listener feedback about our beards. As we navigate these personal anecdotes, we also touch on the more serious topic of drug addiction, morphine's allure, and the role of family responsibilities in shaping our choices.
We wrap up with a lively chat about improving our podcast's audio quality, with some funny moments around squeaky chairs and old microphones. Plus, we give a shout-out to our growing international audience and share some useful tips on using the Nextdoor app for neighborhood pet care. However, things take an unexpected and crude turn when we circle back to Hunter Biden, ensuring that this episode is a rollercoaster of humor, personal stories, and insightful reflections you won't want to miss.
Subscribe to 'The Original Canceled Radio Guys' . Go to https://www.ChrisandCostello.com
Email ChrisandCostello@Yahoo.com
Ever wondered what life is really like behind the bars of a "fancy" prison? Strap in for a hilarious and revealing episode as Gustavo and I share stories that range from beard debates to the realities of federal incarceration. Along the way, we break down myths about so-called luxurious prisons and offer a firsthand account of the strict rules and harsh conditions that define life in a federal camp. Plus, hear our thoughts on Hunter Biden's recent conviction, and get a sneak peek at an exclusive interview that promises to delve into his state of mind post-verdict.
But that's not all—this episode is packed with laughter and life lessons. We tackle the awkwardness of full physical exams, including a prostate check that left me reflecting on the LGBTQ+ experience. Gustavo shares his struggles with car repairs following an accident, and we both chuckle over listener feedback about our beards. As we navigate these personal anecdotes, we also touch on the more serious topic of drug addiction, morphine's allure, and the role of family responsibilities in shaping our choices.
We wrap up with a lively chat about improving our podcast's audio quality, with some funny moments around squeaky chairs and old microphones. Plus, we give a shout-out to our growing international audience and share some useful tips on using the Nextdoor app for neighborhood pet care. However, things take an unexpected and crude turn when we circle back to Hunter Biden, ensuring that this episode is a rollercoaster of humor, personal stories, and insightful reflections you won't want to miss.
Subscribe to 'The Original Canceled Radio Guys' . Go to https://www.ChrisandCostello.com
Email ChrisandCostello@Yahoo.com
Thank you, hey everybody, this is Chris hey this is, gustavo, how you doing.
Speaker 3:Chris, have you left any more cars? It's good we can go. Thanks, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 2:I haven't driven much since the accident. I've been saying that my left arm is sticking to kill me, but it's getting better. My car is better. My car has been fixed, which is good. The mechanical damage has been fixed. The body damage won't be till July, windshield won't be till July and by then hopefully we'll be back the way it used to be, the way we were. We were so close together.
Speaker 3:I tell you what this smile is brought to you by.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they cracked my teeth on that, which is good, so I'm going to do a quick update. It's really funny because we got an email this week from a guy who didn't like us talking about beards. I don't know what the hell we said that was bad about beards, but I was just saying I grew mine out, I let it do its natural color, which has turned like white. Yeah, it was okay. So I'm trying some salt and pepper. I like this way better. If I told you my town's view is to not shave and see what you got. Look at you, look at me. You've got your white whiskers popping up everywhere.
Speaker 3:It's a little bit, but it's just white. There are some ginger ones in there. What ones, hmm?
Speaker 2:Ginger ones, ginger ones, red ones. Yeah, oh, ginger, I thought maybe some lively ones. I wonder if ginger was. Ginger is red Okay.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, like a redhead, Like a redhead, it must be a British thing. I don't know. What do you think? Should I keep it?
Speaker 2:I think it looks really good. I think it looks good Okay.
Speaker 3:Well, this, of course, is for our listeners who have video, so your viewers, and for this, of course, is for our listeners who have video, so your viewers and for our listeners, yes, we both have beards.
Speaker 2:If you don't have video, just guess and try to figure it out, okay? And to the guy who didn't like us talking about beards, that's it. It's just a beard update. It's harmless, okay. Look at Kansai. He looks at least three months younger by having that beard.
Speaker 3:I tell you what, if I can do this without screwing everything up? I was going to find the actual email.
Speaker 2:Oh, we'll get to that. Okay, we've got time for that. I've got to tell you what did happen. I'm due. It's been a while. I don't know if you get these or not, because you had your thing. They make you do it every year. I had to do my big, full, full physical yesterday. This is the kind where you got to stand there, just start naked, where the doctor flicks your balls, you know, yanks in your wonker, and then he does the most dreadful thing of all to check your prostate. You hear the glove snap, oh nothing. He moves up the finger, up the finger, goes up the Willy Wonka Chalk Factory and then turn to the left, turn to the right, rotates us around and pulls it out and you know what? Afterwards we had a cigarette together and I think about taking him to dinner. I don't know.
Speaker 3:Well, only if he sniffed it, oh God.
Speaker 2:What can you get on that day?
Speaker 3:That's a mere nothing.
Speaker 2:That's just a bad visual. You know I was facing Ford, he was behind me, so he may have. So I don't know, I hope not, but man, I hate that thing.
Speaker 3:It's not a very pleasant feeling, I grant you.
Speaker 2:I don't know, I mean just thought it out there, you okay, yeah, how do the gay guys handle that. I'm sorry. I mean, you know, give me a break.
Speaker 3:Well, that's a whole different thing. So I understand and I don't really know. Oh, you don't, I have never.
Speaker 2:You're feeding a little ginger. That's true Ginger beer. I don't have an answer for that I just mean only the closest I know is like doing that prostate and I'll say this I was with some women once who thought that it would be a turn on for a guy for them to figure out. You know.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's great until they grow fingernails.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I get cuts on the inside. I'm just going. First time one did that, I went okay, and the reason for this is they go. We're supposed to make you even more harder and more enhanced. I'm going hmm, you know that's not working. You can remove it anytime you want. She goes. I'm trying to, but your sphincter is getting so tight and my finger is stuck in there right now. I'm going. So she's going relax, relax your butt muscles. I get my finger out. I'm going. Okay, she's going. It's still not relaxed. I can't get my finger out. Now she's starting to panic, okay, hey, we're going to meet my parents in five minutes. Let me tell you guess what? She never did that again. Good, no one's done that until my physical yesterday.
Speaker 2:It just made me think that I have a lot of friends who are gay, so I have to ask them I go, how does that feel? I got them. Well, you pick your friendly neighborhood gay guy and ask him if he's into it. We're doing a Kristen Costello survey. What does that feel like up your butt? Well, you're going to lose a friend right there, I think right.
Speaker 3:I think you'd lose respect.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't think I'd go there. The thing was I was asking I go, I go why You're bugging me to have one of these things like once a year, once every two years.
Speaker 3:Let me ask you this yes, you haven't had a colonoscopy yet. You must have done.
Speaker 2:Oh heck, yeah, man. You know, because of my cancer I had a colonoscopy every six months for five years.
Speaker 3:OK, well, what's the big deal about a finger? I'm not awake, oh I was awake never had a colonoscopy they put you under.
Speaker 2:You're not awake. You wake up and you're laying down a pile of shit and they go okay, clean yourself up, you can go now. I'm just going look at the mess you left behind, you know you made it. Yeah, this is, this is. This is ass month for me, because it's been five years since my last colonoscopy Based on my cancer history. I had to have another colonoscopy in July. So, once again, I'll start to get loose back there, since everyone's going up there, okay.
Speaker 2:So, I'm not going to be tight anymore. Can I ask will you stop crawling up my ass please? So that'll be my last name for a while. So don't ask me to turn out grand, no, it will. My blood work is great. They deem me 100 very healthy, and but they just, I told myself, you guys asking for all this stuff, you're starting to make me feel old, you know, and it gets into your, it gets into your head. So one guy handles old, who? Just one of my all-time heroes, rodney Dangerfield. You two are talking about old. Let's listen. This is how you handle old stuff, right here. Okay, here we go.
Speaker 6:This is it I tell you I can't relax. My kid drives me nuts. The other day I told him. I said you're young, you don't have it upstairs. He told me I'm old, I don't have in bed. She said again I'm getting old, I'm not a kid anymore. I know I'm getting old. In Vegas I played a slot machine. Three prunes came up. I know I'm getting old, I'm at the age. Now if I hear someone goes both ways, I figure it's number one or number two. I'm not a kid, I'm getting old, johnny, I'm getting a kid. I'm getting older, johnny, I'm getting older. You kidding, I took a vacation with the Mexico. I got the walks. I can't get girls anymore. You kidding, now, at my age, you become a hooky. No, you kidding my age. To me the daily double is prune juice and an enema. My last birthday cake. I couldn't blow out the candles. The heat drove me back. I tell you I can't relax.
Speaker 2:My kid drives me nuts. No one handles old like danger. I love that one, the reference to Vegas. Hey, pulled the slot machine and three prunes came up. Three crows the Denny Double was an enema and some prune juice. Hey, hey.
Speaker 3:Didn't hear about his doctor, dr Billy Pompah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's great. I started ranting off the old story. I just said, oh, that's just like what I went through the other day at the physical. We had to play that.
Speaker 3:Rest in peace, rodney. Rest in peace. Love you, rodney. You're classic, him and George Carlin man on the strip back in the day, that's when we had entertainment.
Speaker 2:It's amazing what George Carlin turned into. I don't know if you remember or not, and maybe you don't. When he used to appear on the Ed Sullivan show, he'd come out in a suit and tie with slick back hair. He's doing that thing with the hippie dippy weatherman Tonight's forecast dark, tomorrow's forecast light. That's what he used to do. Then he evolved into this master of the language and words and became a hippie dippy weatherman with the long hair. It was funny how he started and what he became, and you know what?
Speaker 3:What he says now, or rather what he said then, is happening now, because you know he got into the political thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah yeah, if you look at some of his old stuff, you're going man spot on it. You know exactly. I wish he'd have lived long enough to deal with Trump. That would have been fun to hear what he had to say. Can you imagine? Yeah, I'd like to. Yeah, we've got to think a little bit of politics, okay? Oh yeah, Since Hunter Biden has been found guilty and he's now a felon, so my thought is okay.
Speaker 2:The other side, the Trump side, the Trump side, the asshole side can't keep going. The justice system is rigged. It, the other side, the Trump side, the Trump side, the asshole side can't keep going. The justice system is rigged. It's biting. All against me, they're all against me, it's all rigged. Well, how's that for rigged? His own son is now a convicted felon. He made it very clear he's doing the right thing. I'm not going to intervene. I'm not going to commute a sentence. I'm not going to pardon him. What he gets, that's just the way it is. Even though he's a dad, it's got to be very hurtful. The Trump, as you noticed, has been real quiet about this thing because he's going oh crap, how am I going to use this thing anymore about it being rigged against me now, when all that happened to him he's not even done yet he's got another court date in LA about income tax evasion, which is the one that could actually really, really for sure, send you to prison.
Speaker 3:That's the one we really need to watch, isn't?
Speaker 2:it. Have you heard Trump say anything since the 100th? That's not a damn thing, right.
Speaker 3:Not much A little bit on the internet and a little bit on my computer.
Speaker 2:What can you say? It's rigged against him because well, hey, asshole, there's proof that it is not rigged against you. Okay, it's actually going to be more harmful to him than it probably is for you, because putting an ex-president in jail is going to be very difficult. So I'm just such a big fan of the home confinement so I don't think Hunter is going to prison over this one, but I think if he's found guilty of the tax evasion, it's kind of hard not to avoid jail time on that one.
Speaker 3:So we'll see what happens. He'll go to one of those fancy prisons, but it won't be hard time, will it? I?
Speaker 2:mean I'd say go to federal camp, maybe so.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, I mean no, they'll just stick him in a camp, like they do with all the CEOs and everybody.
Speaker 2:That's where they Well you know, lest you forget.
Speaker 3:I've been to camp it ain't no freaking picnic. I keep on thinking this okay, all right, been to camp it makes me sound like.
Speaker 2:oh, we're laying around in the sun all day, we're playing pickleball and making croquet blankets and eating steak and lobster. Wrong, oh, it's not. No, the only thing different about camp is there are no fences. Ok, so you're trusted if you, if you even think about walking out the boundary, that of course you get on the big slammer and you have years added on your sentence. Why would you do that? So it's you start to be locked up certain time. Every night they lock you in, like at 9 pm. You sleep in a shitty bunk with a flat mattress. You know you had to eat the crappy food, you know, and you had to work a job while you're there. So tell me what picnic you?
Speaker 3:can't. Well, I don't think it'd be as bad as being shot in a little like six-by-six with Bubba.
Speaker 2:Well, if you did something to deserve that, hey. But you know I had my job I applied for because I was only the only person there, I guess, who had a, a current driver's license, less best have been there for so long. Their license had expired, right. So I was a driver. So every morning I'd get up and I would drive, uh, certain other inmates to the hospital or to you know, using medical appointments and stuff, and come back and pick him up a certain certain time. Sometimes I would cheat, you have to go to the hospital. I would go the opposite way, way from the back to the camp. I'd push a little bit, drive down the road a little bit, going freedom, and then come back If I got caught going the wrong way. It's like, you know, you start to stretch and cheat a little bit. But I was the driver. So that was my job, really tough job, and I drove that's what they had not an electric car, it was an all. It was a natural gas car.
Speaker 3:Oh, yeah, yeah, propane.
Speaker 2:Yeah, how safe did I feel driving that damn thing. You know, one match boom.
Speaker 3:Well, same with a gasoline car. In fact you're probably safer because you've got valves and a much thicker I don't know.
Speaker 2:That's the only time I've been around any natural gas car. You know what it's like. You think an electric car is quiet. That sucker made not a hum. I mean nothing. You know Really. I had to go to the little gas station there and fill it up and you just stick that thing. It's like you're filling up your tank at home. It's just quiet until you cap it off. That's about all you hear. But when you drive it it's just nothing. It's like am I hitting the gas? Is anything moving? And all of a sudden it lurches ahead. It doesn't go as fast as an electric car, but I guess they haven't caught on. I've never heard or seen anything about them since then.
Speaker 3:Well, I mean, all the forklifts are driven by propane. Anything that has to go inside and have a motor has propane, all those things.
Speaker 2:So you haven't liked me. I had no idea that.
Speaker 3:Well, there you go, there you go.
Speaker 2:It's the Costello fact of the day.
Speaker 3:Well, propane it is, you know.
Speaker 2:Forklifts on propane indoors are driven by natural gas. I had no idea.
Speaker 3:That's right. Anything that is not electric, it's going to be propane.
Speaker 2:I thought they were electric. It makes sense. You can't have carbon monoxide crap going on on the inside there.
Speaker 3:I'll tell you what, and now we're going to stop for a brief moment.
Speaker 2:Unless you're sniffing it. Go back to Hunter Biden. He's guilty. He's a felon. I was shocked over his wife. I'm going god damn it. Well, look what money will buy. I mean, he's a. He's an online sex pervert. He's a drug addict for years. He's making millions living off dad's name. Not saying he's doing any illegal in that sense, we just just mention the name. I'll give him a job. Thanks, we got biden working here and and look what he gets for a wife after all that crap. But you know what? She was the one who had a lot to do with straightening him out, so we'll give her credit for that.
Speaker 3:I would say the judge is going to look at his wife and look at him, and look at his wife again and go 10 years. Honey, what are you doing for the next 10?
Speaker 2:years. That may happen. He may go. You don't deserve that, that's true. And he may go. You don't deserve that, that's true. But you know he looked calm when he was walking out of the courthouse after he was found he was convicted. He looked a little stressed and we're lucky that. You know we have really good connections. So this is the first he hasn't spoken to anybody. You know, since he's been convicted. We have him on the line Just a couple minutes. We're going to give us just a couple minutes where I talk to Hunter Biden and just very simply, hunter, I appreciate you being here, man, but the big question is when you get that guilty verdict and you knew you were a convicted felon and you may be looking at prison time I mean, how did you handle it? Are you okay? You all right?
Speaker 4:I don't know.
Speaker 2:Thank you. Does that mean? Oh shit, he's relaxing man Right about how clean he was. Hey put down the pipe on her. Come on, all right man, oh shit.
Speaker 3:Sniff this man, you know.
Speaker 2:Back into it. What about this gorgeous wife you have? I mean, you want the drugs or you want the wife. What's it going to be? I don't know until the you in a minute man.
Speaker 3:How about the wife and the drugs man? It's going to be the drugs.
Speaker 2:Can't have both. Dude, Can't have both. Oh yeah, Does it stress you out about the fact that you may go to prison? You okay with that. Nothing to it. Who's daddy what?
Speaker 4:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:You know if I lost him.
Speaker 2:I'd still be smoking shit too, I think we lost him here somewhere. Well, I'm sure he passed out. I think we lost him here somewhere. I'm sure he passed out.
Speaker 3:I think there might be a small possibility of that happening.
Speaker 2:Ladies and gentlemen, another Christian Castello Excuse me, I said Hunter Biden, let's hear it for him Soon to be inmate number 894 and 654.
Speaker 3:Oh, I know we got him back to you just for man. He's still hitting that pipe.
Speaker 2:Oh Jesus, put it down, dude. Why'd you just wipe that? Anyway, he's supposed to be taken care of. He's in there just toking up in the bathroom, probably. Thanks for the time. Okay, happy tripping. Hopefully you'll come down by Monday over the weekend.
Speaker 3:Actually, I think, I think we'll just get rid of him. That way, I think we'll get the best out of him out of that.
Speaker 2:Good luck, buddy. One thing I say to you remember your friends, Share with your friends. Come on, don't be so damn greedy with the drugs. Costello loves that good soap.
Speaker 3:I do, I do. Yeah, I particularly like morphine.
Speaker 2:Funny you should mention that. Yeah, funny that I got quite a sense of that. Funny you should mention that.
Speaker 3:What I can remember, they'd ask me what do you want?
Speaker 2:They'd say morphine on their nose, that's what they say.
Speaker 3:Do you want some extra Tylenol, this, that and the other morphine?
Speaker 2:Morphine. I take the Tylenol Extra Strength Morphine. Yes, boys and girls, it's not over the counter and this is what you get when you've had cancer and stuff. Sometimes they give you this in case you ever need it Like every damn day. No, I'm just kidding. I haven't taken one in probably six years. But I did take one this week, slept like a bacon rock man. I passed out and I just remember the last thing, my last thought. I woke up the next morning I was in the same position with the same thought about eight hours later. Wow, cool, a little bit of drool, not too much, but not too bad. It was like that was one of the best damn sleeps I've had in a long time. That was great. Not that we're advocating taking drugs. No, we're doing it. Don't get the wrong idea. We're not doing that because we had Hunter Biden on drug addict. Don't think I'm a morphine nut. I'm actually just doing a family. I'm mailing this in to Costello.
Speaker 3:The question is why would they make it illegal illegal? I know it's horribly addictive.
Speaker 2:Morphine.
Speaker 3:What's wrong with being horribly addicted to something that makes you sleep?
Speaker 2:Well, morphine is not only addictive, it's just by prescription. Okay, if you're in the hospital, of course it's going to be through an IV drip which is much stronger. That's when you get the little button and you push that and go. Anytime you have any pain, push that and release some more morphine and you're sitting there going clicky, clicky, clicky, clicky.
Speaker 4:It's like what Stop Open it?
Speaker 2:up, Click, click click you can get a prescription that's like a very mild five milligrams. This one is 15 milligrams, no wonder. I went something like that Clicky, clicky, clicky, clicky the next day I had no arm pain from my car wreck. I was all rested and slept well. It was really good.
Speaker 3:Well, you know what that's not so cheap. As you know, I had a car wreck also many, many months ago. Your car was total. Yes, my car was total. Sadly, oh terribly.
Speaker 2:Very sad. I love that car A two-seat shitm sad. I love that car A two-seat shitmobile. I love that car.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I know, but there's one for sale if you got 21 grand, something like that. Anyway, that's not just a convenient number, that's actually what they're asking for. It's gone up by about five grand, which is amazing.
Speaker 2:So you found another car like the one you had, and it was for $21,000?.
Speaker 3:No, you know what I did? I bought that SUV.
Speaker 2:Did you find one like that for $21,000, though, and you passed on that yes.
Speaker 3:What list would you like to get?
Speaker 2:I'm sending you more morphine, okay, would you please?
Speaker 3:Would you please. I have gone from. Hey man, nice, cool car to get that out of here. You can't park here.
Speaker 2:That's right. Hey, Gramps, move that car. Are you picking up the grandkids in that thing?
Speaker 3:Get out of the way. That's exactly what's happened.
Speaker 2:Well, I thought you went from coolness to like you know so.
Speaker 3:Well, I can always change it, maybe.
Speaker 2:I will. So go back to the old part. So you're kind of, I would say, semi, but mostly retired, and you're settling in. You're pretty freaking bored, aren't you? And plus you're living in a place where there isn't a damn thing to do, unless you go back to school and you go to University of South Carolina if you want to do that, I don't want to do that.
Speaker 3:No, I don't want to do that.
Speaker 2:Why don't you come out here and spend a month in Colorado with me? Why don't you come on out here? Plenty to do, I'll keep you busy.
Speaker 3:Keep you active. Listen, I'll tell you what We'll go mountain biking We'll go hiking.
Speaker 2:I'll take you back to golf again.
Speaker 3:I know how much you love that. You know I was thinking about that. Well, when I have the back surgery done which was supposed to be yesterday, but it got again I'm eating something. So the back surgery has been put up for a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2:Why are you eating during the show?
Speaker 3:It's glucose. It's what Glucose, glucose, glucose does.
Speaker 2:You're sitting on a blown out whipping cushion, it is. You're in the back race. I'll take you out to play some of these mountain courses. That's what I'm going to tell you. I'm going to take you out to the Vales. It's a course out there I like a lot. It's called Singletree. It's a lot of fun. It's called Singletree man. It's a lot of fun, Just the fun of being out there. I mean, it's just really gorgeous.
Speaker 3:I'd come out there, no problem.
Speaker 2:I mean, the problem is, I'll give you a couple of big fresh buffalo burgers and have some grilled quail on the side. Man, it'd be great. Oh yes, you need to get your ass out in and hit the road, okay.
Speaker 3:My ass up and my family.
Speaker 2:You're hitting the worst part of the year in Columbia, south Carolina, but it's going to get real hot and real humid. We're here in Colorado where the night still gets down to 58, 60,. Okay, the high today was a whopping 81,. Okay, yeah, I know yeah road trip it's time for a road trip.
Speaker 3:It may well happen. I got no problem. I got out of here in a heartbeat.
Speaker 2:Anyway, all good things. You got to drive that far from South Carolina to Colorado. Try to remember which. You're on the right side of the road instead of the left, I don't remember by then. That old British thing comes back to you.
Speaker 3:But I'm telling you, it's road trip time it's such a road trip. I just go down, straight down, i-40 and then up to 35 or 25. I don't remember 25.
Speaker 2:25, it is yeah, yep, then come on down to 25, man, Hit on energy, be here before you know it.
Speaker 3:You'll be here before you know it.
Speaker 2:You know the interesting thing about it is I drive completely differently in this vehicle. I drive like an old man. Well yeah, you can't go out and hit the curves and want to gun it. You hit the sharp. You're in a four-door family wagon.
Speaker 3:I'll tell you what. In this four-door Mercedes wagon, my friend, you hit the floor it's got a bigger engine than the little one had.
Speaker 2:It's a bigger car. I hope it has a bigger engine.
Speaker 3:You never make it up a freaking hill, okay, but it has a two-step turbo, and what that means is you can go to turbo or extra turbo.
Speaker 2:Extra turbo when you hit the. Rockies out there. You're going to need extra turbo to get up the hill. That'd be great.
Speaker 3:The beauty of it is since you're mostly retired, white beard, you can take your time coming out here and stop and see some fun things on the way instead of being such a freaking hurry.
Speaker 2:That's probably something I should do. Yes, you can pass through Arkansas and you'll say to yourself why do people live in this state? And then you'll hit Oklahoma and you'll go why do people live in this state? And then you hit the Kansas and you're going holy shit, I'm turning around. But after that you'll hit beautiful Colorado and life is good. After that Colorado there'll be Utah. Mexico. It's beautiful.
Speaker 3:Yeah, no, I've lived there, you know that.
Speaker 2:I know, but you didn't live here long enough and you've been away long, long time, oh, a very long time, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:Well, I mean, you know, maybe we should put it to a vote to our listener. She's waiting for you, she's going, maybe you like.
Speaker 2:Don't feed me. Road trip Come.
Speaker 3:Actually, it would be so bad, because how long does it take, what a day to get to Vegas from there.
Speaker 2:If I drive, I do drive straight through sometimes. I'm going to drive straight through this weekend. On Sunday, on Father's Day that's my Father's Day I'm driving straight to Vegas. It'll take me about 10 and a half 11 hours Plus. You know, I gain an hour because it's an hour time.
Speaker 3:Yes, you do so.
Speaker 2:I'll say I get there at 7 pm. I'll get there actually at 6 pm.
Speaker 3:So that'd be good. Yeah, well, I mean, I think so.
Speaker 2:So last week I talked to you to grow in a beard. This week I'm talking you into road trip. You can listen to our podcast on the way out here over and, over and over.
Speaker 3:There you go.
Speaker 2:Well, that'd be a fun thing to do, wouldn't it? We covered Biden. Now it's time to cover Trump. We have a new episode of Little Donnie Trump why he grew up and why he's the fucked up person he is today.
Speaker 3:Okay, if we must, if we must Welcome to Little Donnie Trump.
Speaker 1:Now let's join the Trump family in their home in 1951. Little Donnie, I'd like you to meet my attorney, Mr Roy Cohn. Pleased to meet you, Mr Cohn.
Speaker 4:Nice to meet you too, little Donnie. What a charming blonde young boy you are. You can call me Uncle Roy. Gee thanks, uncle Roy.
Speaker 1:Now, little Donnie, I've got some work to do this afternoon and your Uncle Roy, here, has volunteered to take you out on his boat.
Speaker 4:Have you ever been on a boat ride, little Donnie? No, but it sounds like lots of fun.
Speaker 1:Look, roy, I know how you are with young men. You keep your fucking hands to yourself. You understand me.
Speaker 4:Oh, don't worry, Fred, he's just an adorable little blonde boy. What could possibly happen?
Speaker 7:Gee, uncle Roy, this is swell. Your boat is really great. But what's the deal with all these half-naked young guys all sweaty and dancing and stuff?
Speaker 4:Oh, don't worry about them. Little Donnie, what say you? And I go down, I mean go down below, to my cabin, so I can show you some things.
Speaker 7:Okay, Uncle Roy, but why do we need to go down to your cabin?
Speaker 4:Well, donnie, I wanted to show you my thing. I mean some things. Come downstairs with me.
Speaker 5:Fred, I'm really worried about little Donnie. He's alone in his room and I caught him playing with his pee-pee.
Speaker 1:Oh no, marianne, that's quite disturbing.
Speaker 5:I know Fred. When he got home this afternoon, he kept talking about how someone named Uncle Roy had taught him some things. Do you have any idea who he's talking about?
Speaker 1:Uncle Roy Er. Uh well, no, marianne, I'm not quite sure who that is, but I'll certainly check into it.
Speaker 4:Well, I certainly hope you will.
Speaker 1:Something has clearly happened to Little Donnie and I'm worried about it, roy, what the fuck happened between you and little Donnie?
Speaker 4:Oh, calm down, Fred. You left him with me. What did you think was going to happen?
Speaker 1:Roy, are you telling me you molested little Donnie?
Speaker 4:Fred molest is such an ugly word. I simply taught him about the birds and the bees and the penises.
Speaker 1:Roy Cohn, you are a deviant, perverted piece of shit. I can't believe you molested my son, oh relax, Fred.
Speaker 4:It's not like it's going to turn him into a sexually retarded womanizing pig who tries to fuck everything that moves and doesn't care about the consequences. I'm sure he'll turn out to be perfectly normal.
Speaker 1:Goddamn you, Roy Cohn.
Speaker 4:Here's a highlight from next week's episode. Say little Donnie, would you like to go on another boat ride? Hell yes, Uncle Roy.
Speaker 1:Fuck, no, roy, little Donnie's not going on any more boat rides with you.
Speaker 4:Be sure to tune in next week for another episode of Little Donnie Trump.
Speaker 2:Little Donnie Trump, there we go.
Speaker 3:That's so true.
Speaker 2:I must tell you one thing I learned during this episode. As you're moving around, that's the squeakiest damn thing you're sitting on. We're going to take a collection. It's the same thing I always sit on. We're going to buy you a cloth thing to sit on. Okay, come on, man. Look, this is some squeaky ass piece of whooping cushion. Look at this thing. I'll tell you what Piece of buffalo hide I'm sitting on out here. It's nice and soft like that.
Speaker 3:I'll tell you what. The day you buy a new microphone and deck, then maybe.
Speaker 2:Well, let me tell you this the reason I haven't bought a new microphone yet is because I was informed by my part-time employer, which used to be my business. The new owner. They're buying me a whole set up home computer here with microphone, new screen, the whole deal.
Speaker 3:okay, right, well make sure it gets your decent room.
Speaker 2:I can excite you or something, right? No, it sounds great. The guy has one at the office in Vegas and it's really awesome. I talk to him all the time. Microphone sounds great. So they're going to send it after this trip, when I come back, so I'll have it in about the second week of July. Can't wait, can't wait, can't wait.
Speaker 3:Oh boy me either. It might be so nice to have nice clean audio, although we are doing a lot better than we were that clean audio, although we are doing a lot better than we were.
Speaker 2:That clean audio is not my fault. It comes to fine. When we redo our podcast, whatever streaming service we use, it just falls frigging apart. Let me ask you we were on, we're trying to get on this radioco. Is that who we're trying to get on right? Yeah, I just had to put things together. What's the other thing we're on right? Yeah, I just had to put things together. So, anyway, so what's the other thing? So we're on like is it podcast news? No, it's like what's the thing we're on with those British guys you met last?
Speaker 3:year. Oh yeah, Podcast radio.
Speaker 2:Podcast radio, so they're still using our stuff from our show, right?
Speaker 3:Oh, absolutely. They got like 10 shows with us so you can go listen to 10 shows they just pick something out of the 10 shows and just keep it.
Speaker 2:Have you sent them anything new lately?
Speaker 3:Well, it's just because they haven't asked for anything lately what? Does that tell you? I'll give them a yell and see what they want.
Speaker 2:It's never a good time, Gus. They haven't asked for anything new in a while. Hello Got standard face incentives and stuff. Man, we get all kinds of niche. That's been going on.
Speaker 3:Well, I assumed that they would let us know if they wanted more product. I gave them an awful lot of stuff, and don't forget, it's in 10-minute blocks. I gave them hours and hours and hours.
Speaker 2:Did you have any idea? Yeah, Are we still on where we were at before that? You know of no update from those guys at all. Do I know Any update from those guys at all about new markets stuff like guys at all? No, no, no. New markets, stuff like that Nothing.
Speaker 3:No, no, I haven't heard nothing.
Speaker 2:We were in Charlotte, Cleveland. Somebody's got a broadcast in Cleveland.
Speaker 3:This one's got to live there too. Actually, I think we're in South Carolina too, yeah, well like you said, charlotte, and probably Myrtle, you know so, yeah, well, like you said, sean, and probably Myrtle Beach all the Carolinas and the mid-Atlantic.
Speaker 2:We've got pretty good, and as far Midwest would be Cleveland, you know. So I'll let you go, not west yet, but we're everywhere, man. So if you don't pick us up through them, which is on bits and pieces through radio, they always put us on before the financial person, which is kind of weird. We're coming on, you get the pig-scooting thing as we sign off and the guy's going. Today's stock market dip. I'm just going. That's a bad segue. Whatever, we came on after this therapist who's trying to talk people out of suicide. Come on.
Speaker 2:Hey we're Christian Costello.
Speaker 3:I haven't heard that happen yet.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we could be the cause of many a suicide you have to go to podcastradiouscom.
Speaker 3:Yeah, there you go, and there you will find us, the original cancelled radio guys. Easy enough. A lot of people think we're just called Chris and Costello. It will come up that way Either way. Yeah, it comes on the big wide world web as well.
Speaker 2:Either way, and it's like wherever you find your podcast, listen to your podcast. You will also find Chris and Costello, the original cancelled radio guys. Man, we're everywhere. We're like fungus, we're like kudzu, we spread everywhere and every service there is, you can't help but find us. We've got this big audience out in Saudi Arabia how Saudi. And also in Japan and stuff. It's kind of neat. We're everywhere.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, here's the thing we're like. Well, we're not poisonous, but we're, which is no, that's not good.
Speaker 2:It's a different analogy. Okay, I'll go with that. You can smoke us if you want. Like Boy George said, we're church of the poison mind. That's where we are.
Speaker 3:There you go, Exactly exactly and guaranteed to get more exciting and more entertaining as we go. Don't talk about beards. Thank you, Jim.
Speaker 2:Jim won't do it anymore, we promise. I think Castello's looked really good. Have you seen because? Did you watch the Amy Winehouse movie yet? No, I haven't seen it yet. I want to see it. I think it's called Back in Black. I think that was the name of the album. Yeah, so that's the name of the. That's not documented. It's kind of like a movie about her short but really fascinating life.
Speaker 3:There was a documentary about her that I did see there was, so is that what you were pertaining to?
Speaker 2:No, it's just a movie, man. It's a new movie. I was watching the girl who's doing it, which is a hard thing to do. She's actually doing a pretty good job. It's really about her life. I mean, she had such a short life, you know, so it covers as much as they can in like a two-hour movie. She died when she was 27. Yeah, mixed reviews. You know. Some people thought it was great, some like, eh, it's not enough, or you make her look bad. Well, you know, with her it was good and there was some bad. That's why she's dead, for God's sake.
Speaker 3:Well, bad. That's why she's dead, for God's sake. Well, she's dead because she quit drinking and then had one more drink, I think, or something, and it just blew her system apart.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was like a cute alcohol poisoning. She had drugs in her system too, or was it just the alcohol?
Speaker 3:What had happened was that she'd gone to rehab and she was clean, clean and just the stress of that on her body was too much.
Speaker 2:I guess. So the other thing this year with George Michael he was overdosed drugs and alcohol right and he was 27.
Speaker 3:Just by the way, george Michael was only 27.
Speaker 2:where did you get that from what? Just by the way, george Michael George Michael's older than 27.
Speaker 3:Where'd you get that? From what when?
Speaker 2:did. I get that from Yahoo. George Michael had a long career. He's in 47.
Speaker 3:You're right. No, no, no, no, let's see.
Speaker 2:A lot of famous people died at 27. Janis Joplin, 27. Jimi Hendrix 27. Jim Morrison 27. Chris Farley 27. John Belushi I'm not sure he was right around that age, though, so probably 27. Amy.
Speaker 3:Whitehouse 27. Brian Jones from the Rolling Stones. Costello, I know I know Brian Jones from the Rolling Stones, costello. Okay, I know, I know this new life is really taking a little time to get going.
Speaker 2:He's here physically but he's brain dead but it'll be coming back soon. It'll be coming back.
Speaker 3:Oh God, I hope so, man. This is ridiculous. You know what will do it what?
Speaker 2:A trip to Colorado? No trip to Colorado to open and freshen your mind.
Speaker 3:Do you know what I have? Another I have a couple of friends out there from my radio days. That's how long I've known them.
Speaker 2:Look at this. Do you want to deal with this every day? I'll be in your face like this Calstel. You're not even looking at me. Oh, I'm not looking at you. As you could probably notice, You're looking at melt every day.
Speaker 3:It wouldn't be bad, actually, because you know?
Speaker 2:No, it'd be fun, we'd have a good time.
Speaker 3:I'm not going to lie. I mean, I personally am not lazy, but whatever's going on is like can I get out of bed? Oh fuck, I can't even tell you. That's what I mean. You need a kickstart man.
Speaker 2:You need a booster, you need a reason to to get out. But I'm your reason and we'll go see Uncle Joy, the little Jewish troll who used to live in my basement, who's now the little Jewish troll living in his ex-wife's basement, which ex-wife, his latest ex-wife or his ex-wife? The latest one's not an ex-wife yet, but soon will be. This is the one he was married to for like 20 plus years or something.
Speaker 2:Right his original ex-wife yeah, and they're getting along famously. So he said oh good, see, joey's kind of like you. He had surgery in January. The first couple of days he goes, oh, I feel so much better, like I'm supposed to. This is going to be good. And all of a sudden then he's not healing so well and things are slow for him. So we've got to get everybody together and just get everybody boosted up and just cheered up again.
Speaker 3:What do we need to do? Yeah, well, I mean, I told the people at rehab. I said you know, this really isn't working, because you've got me at rehab at three weeks out of the surgery and I'm here what now? Over six months? I don't think this is really you know either. Can you kind of do it so that I can catch up with myself?
Speaker 2:I don't know if it's not working or just the fact that some of these things take time and you didn't start right away. You let a lot of time pass before you started you should have jumped right into that shit man.
Speaker 3:I know I should have done, but the insurance wouldn't work. As jump right into that shit man, I know I should have done, but the insurance wouldn't work.
Speaker 2:As always, morphine, morphine morphine. Anything else we got to play before we got to go Anything else? Are we missing anything? We got it all More Trump shit. Are we done with that? I hope.
Speaker 3:I'm trying. There's something in the back of my mind now, but oh well, never mind. Oh well, listen, I'll tell you. What I would like to do is ask people. Please go to our website, christencostellocom, which I'm going to rebuild it here shortly, by the way. It's another one of those things. I'll do that tomorrow.
Speaker 2:You can do it, man. Just get up a new day and just go, let's go. You get up and just go. What a great day, let's go.
Speaker 3:Oh God, the beautiful day. See the weather here. It's been fabulous. But anyway, please go there and just subscribe. You don't have to pay. For some reason they put $3 on it. Well, if you can't afford $3, no biggie.
Speaker 2:Be part of the campaign. Last week's campaign was to get Costello to grow a into his car, his Sammy wagon and head out west. West is best Come to.
Speaker 3:Colorado. This is true, I know my kids will be happy about that.
Speaker 2:Let's go, man. Come on, you don't have to go back to Vegas to work. You have to go back to Vegas to work for a bit. You can ride with me and spend out a week there and then come back with me.
Speaker 3:Do that too, yeah yeah, yeah, there you go, yeah, yeah. Well, what do I do with this place in the meantime?
Speaker 2:Well, rent it out to Pookie next door and he can rent it to Pookie and bring his relatives over to stay there and watch it for you.
Speaker 3:There'll be nothing left when you get back. But you know, hey, that's what insurance is for and the and the animals what do I do?
Speaker 2:what do I do with my animals? You see, when you get to find a pet center, man, just go on the neighbor thing, the neighbor app, and just just say, hey, I'm going away for a while, I need someone to watch my pets. I'm going for a month. You can either watch them in your house. I think you can tell you they'll watch them in their house. I mean pets finish everywhere to watch them in their house. I mean pet centers are everywhere. That's a good supplemental income. A lot of people are doing that now, especially out here, because we're like in a big dog state, you know.
Speaker 3:Yeah, well, that would be typical. A little cool you got to show the Nextdoor app.
Speaker 2:You should do that If not all your neighbors are on it. You put out a plea of what you want south on my dog center, because I got three dogs. I don't want to leave me. I want to bring them to your place, you know so does anybody do that? And I got like five in part. Yeah, we got two dogs. We'll take yours on too. We'll watch them, and they all get along great. It's easy. They become friends, and also our dogs are doing as well too. They're great people.
Speaker 3:Okay, we'll go you can do it. I know I'm sure I can do it. I mean, lord, I'm sure you got your homework you got your homework, dude, to go do it.
Speaker 2:In the meantime, who's gonna? Who's gonna bend over this week because he's had a relapse. He's back on drugs. It's hunter biden to squeal him. Hunter, bend over and take it like a biden. Oh okay, man do buddy, oh, now come on.
Speaker 3:You can do better than that, okay, oh yeah, come on buddy, come on wheel boy.
Speaker 6:Wheel, wheel Wheel louder, yeah, louder, yeah, you go Louder.
Speaker 3:Yeah, does it hurt?
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh yeah. You need some work Louder Does it hurt. Get down there, boy, get down there.
Speaker 1:Get down there.
Speaker 3:Took care of him.
Speaker 2:That we did, and that takes care of today's show, we'll leave you with today's parting word is prison.