Love Conquers All with My Wife, Yvonne || WBWL EP 64

Here's a quick Valentine's Day podcast on what my relation shop with my wife means and how we've bolstered a successful and loving relationship.

Although it's something we filmed late at night when the 2 kids were down for bed and it is not a perfect podcast audio, it relates to everyone's relationship to their partner: IMPERFECT.

We all fight our own demons. We all get I arguments and yes something relationships do go through huge ups and downs.

But love truly conquers all. If you're willing to fight, its something you'll find very gratifying for the rest of life.

Thanks to my wife for being a participant. You are my support in everything I do and I love you beyond Valentine's Day!

Transcript

0:01

Welcome to the Won Body Won Life Podcast. Hi, I'm your host, Dr. Jason Won, a lifestyle physical therapist. As I speak about everything in regards to strength training, living a healthier life, but I also really do care about just your quality of life and nurturing relationships around you. I think that's a huge part of our mental and physical health. And after moderate coaxing and basically dragging her down. I'm just kidding here, but basically I have my wife here who, as we know, it's Valentine's day to express love to. The people around you, but especially your spouse and your partner. I just love and appreciate the person that means the most to me and welcome in Yvonne. And how are you doing today? Good. Awesome. Let's start off with this. I feel that from the day that we set our vows and everything, I feel like we definitely have a relationship that that is magnified beyond anything that I would have imagined. What do you define as love? What does love mean to you? I think love is an action, being able to sacrifice something for someone. I think that shows acts of love. I wouldn't say it's a noun. I think it's an action for sure. It's something you display through your own actions. Yeah, and I think that for sure as far as from the actions that we expressed for each other I know that our actions when we didn't have kids, I think that was a lot easier to just have you as my sole focus and vice versa. So with regards to. Having children and being able to sacrifice for one another. I know that love is a verb. It's an action. It's something that we do. So how does, how is love expressed in terms of being able to cater to our children, but also cater to the needs of like your spouse as well? I think of it as instead of having two kids. I have three. So I need to make sure I take care of my third kid as well. So even if it's like Warming up your coffee or making you an extra egg for breakfast Like I need to feed you and take care of you as well. I think that's how I show my love towards you And to the family and kids. Yeah, the we all essentially and I think you taught me this we all have I don't have a specific love language and I think one love language that you told me was like, as far as like the actions that you take for people and how selfless you are and how you're willing to go above and beyond to cater to the needs of others before yourself. I find that's one of the best traits about you. And I'm not exactly sure what my love language is. I've always dabbled with. What that kind of looks like. I feel like I'm always asking you like, hey, do you want to work out downstairs? You want to and I'm always trying to have you in my thoughts. I don't know. What would you feel is like my love language towards you? I don't know why I keep thinking of words of affirmation right now. But I think you definitely do acts of kindness as well to show your love language. Like when you make breakfast for me, or when you help carry heavy stuff up. I think things like that, it shows that you care. Yeah. And, when it comes to, Valentine's Day, and Valentine's Day is oftentimes a time with which Love is it actually it's in the air. It's something that's at top of mind for many people. So many people are spending a lot on flowers or spending a lot on a lot of monetary things, which is fine. But I think that our love is spoken through actions. I'm actually very happy that, you really enjoy the simple things versus, some of the monetary things out there for those that may be. Struggling with relationships and maybe not even struggling, but just for people that want to work on their relationships or work on their love with their significant other. What tips would you give to them? Maybe things that we do that make our relationship successful. I would think that gratitude, practicing gratitude is important, not just for Valentine's Day, but every day of your relationship. And, even if you don't have a spouse or a romantic partner, you can still celebrate Valentine's with, people you love, your family, your friends. I think Valentine's shouldn't just be subjected to romance. Yeah. And like I tell you every year, don't buy me flowers. Sometimes you listen, sometimes you don't, but to me, those are not things that matter, yeah. And I think that for sure, when you tell me like, I don't need this, I don't need that. And again, simplicity is like one of your strong suits. You can find simplicity and just the joy of just having coffee and breakfast with your family. Like we just got back from Hawaii and I think one of your favorite moments was just. You with family and having a quick breakfast and looking out into the, the views in Oahu. I think that's just something that I very much appreciate about you with regards to, those that maybe they have a relationship or maybe they don't. I think that the one thing that I try my best to is I always try to put in my 110 percent towards. anything that I do, whether it's building our relationship or trying to provide for us financially or try to take the extra mile. That's one of my things that I try to do. Another thing that, I think that we do really is we always try to bring things up to the surface. And I think that's what allows our relationship, even though most relationships are never going to be perfect. And they're always trying to be billed. I think we're very resilient as a couple. And what do you feel is significant about bringing things up to the surface? What does that mean to you? I think it means if anything makes you uncomfortable, even in the littlest ways, you let your partner know because they don't always know what you're thinking, even after so many years of marriage. Just voice it out and so they can see where your head's at. You should be comfortable enough to share everything you feel. I think that's important. Yeah. Rather than it hitting you at once as a surprise when your partner comes up and says, Oh, I felt this way since however long ago and you had no idea. Then you can constantly be bettering yourself and your relationship and the way you interact with each other. Yeah. I think that's something that comes to mind with regards to analogy is just letting things really bottle up, right? Because we only have such, we almost have like essentially like a glass or a beaker and a lot of times if we let things fester and your couple is doing something that's either irritating you or it's eating at you for some reason. It's oftentimes that you don't want it to Fester and eventually surface to the point where it boils to a very large argument arguments that require counseling or maybe it requires further actions that you really don't want to take. So I find that whenever we have things that come up, that, that come up and it's whether it's, it's eating at you as eating at me, we oftentimes will try to do our best to squash it that day. So that at the end of the day when we're sleeping with each other and I've, I don't think I've ever been kicked out. You, you've never kicked me out of bed, which is great. Is that basically we always end the day with saying, I love you. And I think that's really important. I guess with regards to like gratitude and saying, I love you at the end of the day, like, why does that, why is that something that is significant? Why do you feel like that's potentially something that's significant, not just to us, but to. Other, other couples out there. It's a good reminder You can get lost in the hustle and bustle of everyday and just being busy with kids and work and anything else that can consume your life. Even just stopping to say I love you is like taking a deep breath and resetting. Bring you back to what's important in life. Yeah, absolutely. Obviously we have kids and I think that, I'm pretty open on my social media about my love for you, obviously, and my love for Trey and Bella. And Bella's four months, Trey's now two and a half. Honestly it's a struggle at times. There's a lot of struggle with. How to balance life balance fitness, balance relationships, balance our health, but also like we're, you're giving so much of yourself to your kids, time, energy, resources. But in, in what way do you feel, especially, that now that we're directly in the grind of things, having two young kids, what sort of advice or what sort of things do you. Implement yourself to remind yourself about I guess the relationship that we've built. That's tough. I forgot your question already. I'm sorry. In terms of, when you're giving a lot of your time, energy and resources and you're sacrificing, obviously a lot of your, a lot of your time, your efforts, even your sleep, how do you feel that? You are still reminded of the relationship that you built, with your spouse, because oftentimes that can get very convoluted and get very distracted. Almost, it feels you're giving so much of your kids, giving so much to your kids versus, to your spouse. So I guess what is, how do you, how are you reminding yourself about the relationship and the. The family and I guess centering yourself around a relationship that you build, especially for Valentine's Day, I think just knowing that you have a partner. You can have teamwork to raise your kids together. I think that's a good reminder that you're not alone. I think just knowing that your partners, It's there for you and you guys can rely on each other and build on each other's strong suit to lean on each other. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. We are surviving. It's tough. And I think that's why I forgot what you asked me, after you asked me. Yeah as we're recording this at like late night, when the kids are down. Yeah. I think that's just, even though they're. Are things that may make you feel uncomfortable. I find that one thing that we're pretty good at is always supporting each other, always hearing each other. I guess always just being present, always being honest. And I think that that's all you can ask for in a relationship is honesty and trust. I know that I can trust you with, I don't know, almost anything. I tell you about my my anxieties, My depressions, my downfalls when I first started my business, I think that you're the one person I went to when I first started, when I felt like my business was going to implode and I had nowhere to go. I think that you're the first person to really pick up the pieces for me. I think that's what love is. Love is not just like you just said, love is not just a noun. It's an action. It's a verb. It's something that you always work on. And I know you said that to me before. It's you're always willing to fight for the relationship. Yeah, we even come up with scenarios like, if this were to happen, will we still fight? Will we still fight? And I think that you said, yes. So I guess from that instance, like why do what's the significance between, behind why you keep fighting? To hold together this family. To see our kids grow up. To see what we've built. There's a lot of things. That's a very open ended question. But, I think ultimately just to take care of this family. That's what we vowed when we got married. To raise a bunch of little ones. Yeah. Yeah. I think just to add to that is I've always said that what is my why for why I even started my business? Why I try to help other parents and help other people around me to specifically to help them to feel stronger, to feel more resilient, to relieve pain. And and I think it's cause partly it's because I really do love my family. And I think that, I think the way that family means the most to me. Is what kind of drives me to help other people with their own families and their own relationships and if they can be a better leader, a stronger leader whether they're a mom or a dad I guess it's just to give them like the fighting chance to be a better to be a better servant for their husbands or their wives. And I know that physical health and mental health and emotional health, they all play into each other. I guess from the standpoint do you have any other tips? Even just based on just our relationship or in general, just things that you've learned do you have anything else that you would want to tell people about love relationships how to bolster those, not just for Valentine's day, but for the rest of life? Big sigh. You can't see your relationship as a 50 50 I give you half you give me half kind of thing or else that's just gonna drive you nuts. You just gotta do what you're good at, keep doing it, make up for the other person, and just hope that everything else works out. Absolutely. I feel like that's why you're laughing is funny because obviously you're the one that, obviously I think holds a lot of this household together with regards to, when I'm busy, you're willing to, do the cooking, multiple times per day. And I can't thank you enough for that. And for that matter, I think that you also see potentially some of the sacrifices that I'm trying to make as well. And even despite these times, despite again, Valentine's Day. Just want to let you know that I think me and Yvonne have a very special relationship one that I think Will last I think that it's one that I feel is The most perfect imperfect relationship that you can have but at the same time, we're you know, there's times where we're struggling especially with two kids and I know all I can say is I appreciate just everything that you've done for me, but also just being on this podcast and sharing with people what true love really means. I think the title of this is love conquers all, and I think that, you're insane. That's a great title. Like, why do you, why ultimately did you pick that title? Because you were struggling to pick a title. That's why I helped you with it. But just never giving up on each other. True love does exist. It may not be perfect, but if you're willing to work on it, that's all that matters. And, I think I'm ready to go to sleep now. Okay the, I think that also at the same time, the, once you look back at the struggles and obviously the The love that you can share. I think that's also just in general as you grow up with each other and your kids become older and you have grandkids. I think that as that love continues to perpetuate on itself. I think that's just memories and things that we can look back at. And yeah, ultimately for anybody that's listening on Valentine's Day yeah. More so just one of the more true raw Audios that we'll have here bring on my wife You may not see her again really but we'll see if I can bring her on again but I just wanted to share just you know, I've shared a lot about gratitude and I've shared a lot about my family and This is just something this is one of my why's for even why I built the podcast why? You know why I continue to serve people wholeheartedly is because of people like Yvonne people like, you know my daughter and my son who continue to push me to be better people and it's people that I love the most. So in any case obviously I appreciate you for being on here. I think it's time for us to go to sleep, but at the same time I hope that other people can be inspired by just some of the real things that we've had to say on here and some of the advice because, amongst most people that I know, I think Yvonne is one of the most loving people. So thank you and appreciate it. Happy Valentine's Day to you. All right. Take care guys. Have a good one.