[00:00:00] Welcome to the Bloom Your Mind Podcast, where we take all of your ideas for what you want, and we turn them into real things. I'm your host, certified coach Marie McDonald. Let's get into it.
[00:00:20] Hello. Welcome to episode number 12 of the Bloom Your Mind Podcast, which is going to be the first of two episodes that are a series, and I'm very excited about this content. I'm recording this for you in Toronto, Canada, where I'm facilitating a three day retreat. We're coming up with a public workshop, me and a whole bunch of thought leaders up here to lead all around Canada to support human thriving.
[00:00:52] How amazing is that phrase, human thriving. I am so excited to be doing work that supports this. I came from San Diego where it is sunny and delightful to. Cold and delightful place in Toronto. And I'm just excited to be working with beautiful minds on a beautiful project in a beautiful place. So I'll be sharing more about that with you very soon.
[00:01:18] Today though, we're going to talk about future tripping. I was thinking about what to call this podcast and immediately I had a phrase that popped into my mind that made me laugh. Definitely going with that. And here's the origin. Of the Frees future trippin'. In the first years that I was with my husband and we were dating, whenever I would talk about anything that was going to happen in the future or ideas for the future, he'd turn to me and say, girl, you're future tripping.
[00:01:50] And I was like, what? But I was like, he called it every time. And now he still calls it that, but it sounds more like, girl, you want to do some future trippin' with. And then we'll just start talking about something in the future. So that is a phrase that I love and that makes me laugh, and that's what you and I are about to get into together.
[00:02:13] We are going to do some future tripping, and this is going to be a two-part episode because I really think this is a hugely important skill, both to turning any idea into reality for sure. It. A huge imperative skill when you're trying to bring something from out of your mind and put it out into the world where you can touch and feel and experience it.
[00:02:38] And the science behind all of the research around things like episodic future thinking and mental rehearsal, and just envisioning futures that are in the short term, the medium term and the long term is. Very clear that it is good for many different parts of us. It's good for depression, anxiety, for your happiness levels.
[00:03:03] It's good for actually creating that future that you're envisioning. It's good for creativity, for empathy, for all kinds of things. So we're going to get into some of that in this first episode. I'm going to share some of the reasons why I recommend that We think from the perspective of our future self, every single.
[00:03:22] And the way that can serve us right now. And then in the next episode, I'll share some of the research behind future thinking and then how to do it. I'll give you a couple of actual mental rehearsals that you can walk yourself through. So for now as we get started, what do when I talk about your future self?
[00:03:41] The heck am I talking about? Let's start by actually doing it. Get comfortable in your. and visualize yourself in the future, your future self, maybe six months from now, maybe a year from now, maybe 10 years from now. [00:04:00] Whatever you like, that future self that has turned the idea for what you want into a real thing, or that's just embodying who you want to be.
[00:04:12] If there's not one singular idea you have in mind that is a change you want to make or a thing you want to create and put in the. . Just imagine that future self and think about what she looks like. Where does she live? What does she do with her time? How does she feel most of the time? What are the three feelings that this future version of you has the very most?
[00:04:47] When this future you, when they wake up in the morning, what do they see when they open their eyes? Who's around them? What does the air feel like? What does the room look like? What do they start thinking about right away? This future you? What are their habits when they get out of bed, what do they do next?
[00:05:10] And after that, are they working? Are they not? Who are they around? Do they laugh a lot? Do they dance? Do they move? What is this future of yours that you're envisioning? Do they interact with people a lot during the day? Do they have a lot of time to themselves? Spend some time envisioning your future self, and I'll remind you about this exercise again at the end of the episode, but for now, I did this exercise with a group of people that I was leading in a coaching group, this incredible group that we did called Bloom After Covid, where we were blooming our minds and our lives, right?
[00:05:50] of At the end of all the quarantining time, and I did this exercise w and one of the people in the group, she said, I'm envisioning her and she's like a coastal. Like what she said. Yeah, she's like a coastal grandma. She wears glowy scarves and robes and she lives in Santa Fe and she's super present.
[00:06:10] When someone talks to her, she like looks them right in the eye and smiles and is this super incredible present source of energy and listening and empathy and compass. And she also cracks jokes a lot, and she's super direct and she like sips tea and dances in front of people if she feels like it. And she wears big hats and she does whatever she wants.
[00:06:33] I'm like, all right, . So once we have our vision for who our future self is going to be, here are the things that we can do with it. Here are the ways that serves. The first thing, when we think about our future self, I just want to talk about the future as an idea, right? When we're pretty young, and I'm talking like at the beginning of our lives, there are some pretty clear things that are like goalposts in our future that we know we're going to work towards and figure out.
[00:07:10] So some of those things might be like, where am I going to live? Am I going to live in one place? Am I going to move? What am I going to do? Am I going to work? And if so, what's my job going to be? Or are we, am I going to have lots of jobs? Am I going to start businesses? What am I going to be when I grow up? And then there's am I going to have a partner?
[00:07:27] Am I going to be alone? Am I going to get married? Am I not going to, am I going to have an open relationship? Am I going to what's love going to look like? Do I want. , do I just love myself? Like partnership, right? And then there's am I going to have children? Am I not going to have children? Am I going to be a part of a community?
[00:07:47] What type of community do I want to be a part of? Like these things that are very clear, maybe even am I going to go to school? Am I not going to go to school? These very clear decisions that are in front of us in the future. And then at some point we figure some of those big goalposts out and we're living in them.
[00:08:06] and then we're like, all right, now what? . And at that point, when we have some of the things figured out and we're looking towards the future, it's super important to set some new goalposts for ourselves. So when we have this idea of our future self, this vision in mind, we can say, all right, I know what it's like on the other side.
[00:08:31] Like 10 or 15 years or 20 years when I'm that future self. But what are the main things I want to do in the meantime? What are my big three goals that I'm going to work towards over the next couple of decades or the next decade? So for me, I have three of them. One of 'em is to change the world through thought leadership in a way that creates an elevated experience for human beings.
[00:08:58] I want to create communities of people that support each other to connect with one another in a way that brings out our best selves and that empowers each other to create the lives we want and to stop being hard on ourselves to start. More to be in our lives and to contribute big things to the world through service, even if that's just through walking around every day in love with ourselves so that other people can feed off that vibe.
[00:09:34] Like even if it's that's what I want to do, create these communities and do good in the world through thought. Books and podcasts and coaching groups and retreats and all the things that I do. That's one of my big goals. Another one is to create home and culture and tradition for my family of four and be super present to play with them in this life that we've created and to love them in the biggest way that I can.
[00:10:03] And then my third big. is to grow my mind and tend my body into the Be best version of myself that I can be. So those are my three. And as I've set those three goals from the vision of who I want to become, my future self, now I know what I'm working towards. So the first thing that having this future vision can do for us, the way it serves us is it helps us to set.
[00:10:33] To aim the days and moments and energy and time that we have in this life toward Last time I talked about like how when you when you have a mission in life, I've talked about this a couple times, but when you know what your life is about, , you can constantly be steering towards it in little tiny moments.
[00:10:55] And I talked about how that's like a rudder of a ship and how every time you change that, even a little bit, you could end up in a totally different place. So when we know the mission of our life and we know what our future self is going to be, and we know what our main goals are for that time, it becomes so much easier to direct.
[00:11:17] Decisions in our life, in the small moments and in the big moments cuz we know what we're aiming at. Now. The second thing that I notice about having a future vision for ourselves is that even though it helps us aim towards where we want to go, the second thing that it does is it actually helps us be where we.
[00:11:46] So in design thinking or any type of innovation technique, or when you're designing your life, when you're trying to turn your ideas into real things, the most important thing is that you have to be where you are first. Be right here. So if there are things you want to change about your life first, the most important thing is to be in the life that you're in, and the body that you're in, and the mind that you're in, right?
[00:12:14] Right here, right now, because we spend a lot of time struggling against reality and trying to change where we're starting. But when you have a future vision for who you're becoming and where you're going, it's much easier to see the whole timeline from the place that you started, where you are right now, and where you want to be at the end of it, and know that you're just in the right place on that path to get to where you wanna.
[00:12:42] Right now you are exactly where you should be and when you're in just the right spot and you know it, there's no struggle to get out of it. There's just a grace and an ease to taking the steps that you need to take. One at a time, one little next step in the direction that you want to go, cuz you're going to get there, but you have to be here first.
[00:13:12] So here are some examples of that when you're making a big change in your life, let's say. So for instance, for me, I was talking about how one of my three goals is that I want to have continue to grow my mind and practice wellness, treat my body well. And I used to exercise a lot. . I used to do yoga every single day.
[00:13:36] I used to do like beaker yoga, like three hour yoga five times a week. I used to run every day at a different time in my life. And during Covid, when we were on lockdown, I was doing that a lot and that was pretty successful. And then actually right after Covid was when things got harder for my family of four.
[00:13:56] Just harder to balance everything. and I really got off track. It became more and more difficult for me. I started my own business. I traveled a lot and some things came up that were personal things in our family that we had to work through different situations with different individuals that we just had to I had to give support to different people and I loved it and I chose it, and I really did not.
[00:14:20] Exercise anywhere near as much as is normal for me. And I really am at a deficit at this point. And then a couple weeks ago I injured my back in one of those freak ways where you like reach for something in the wrong way, carry bags that are too heavy and it was really hurting. It hurt to stand, it hurt to move.
[00:14:39] It hurt to sit and it hurt for a week. It was very painful. And I was like, what the. How did I get here to a place where my strength is so diminished that I am like injuring my back by moving my body around in a normal way. But when I think about who I'll be next year and I know that I'm going to get my strength and my flexibility back, I'm all good.
[00:15:04] I don't worry about it. It's not a big deal that I hurt my back. It's just that I. From the perspective of the person a year from now who's going to get that strength back and get back into the routine of exercising five times a week and feeling wonderful in my body that this was the understandable part where I lost my groove cuz I was starting a business.
[00:15:28] I was taking care of things that happened in my family, the people that I love and hurting my back was that reminder that I needed to wake up and prioritize my body again. But I only have that perspective. when I stand in the ME, that is a year from now looking back and I'm like, oh, okay. That was that part.
[00:15:48] And that makes me feel fine about being where I am right now. All right, here's where I'm starting because I know that in a year from now, I'm going to have my strength back. All right, we're good. Another example is that if you are trying to put something new out into the world and you're requesting things, maybe you're Requesting that people give you feedback on something or you want someone to you're trying to get a book published or anything that is requesting other people to accept the work that you're doing and you're getting a bunch of nos and it feels like failure over and over again.
[00:16:27] If you're looking from the perspective of the you that has the book published, or that has the business started or that has the thing out there in the world, you know that this is the part where you get really good at getting people's attention. You get really good at being resilient and putting your stuff out into the world over and over again.
[00:16:48] This is that part, and you're much more likely to be okay with it, to be okay with being in the part where you're figuring it out because you're looking from the perspective of the one that has it figured. Everything feels calm and present from that place. Or last example. If you're in a relationship and you say something that you're not proud of, we can get really stuck in that.
[00:17:14] Or you do something in a way that you're not proud of. It can feel really hard, but if you look from the perspective of the future, you that has peace and calm and closeness, you know that this is the part where you realized you wish you had acted differently and that you came back to the person you're in relationship with and you talked to them about it, and you were really honest with them because you know that connection with somebody else, it's based on ups and downs and peaks and valleys in the relationship.
[00:17:49] So you'll be much less likely to flip out about making a mistake if you're looking at it from the perspective of the future.
[00:18:00] That's acting the way you want to act. And the last thing that I'll share in this episode is that when you think from the perspective of your future self, you can find the answers that she has because when you're stuck, your future self knows. So if you don't know what to do, imagine that future self and ask.
[00:18:27] What does she do? You can create the life you are aiming for by living it right now. The reason we do that is that when we actually make ourselves a match with our future selves, when we act like our future self, and when we make decisions from the place of our future self, would make ourselves a behavioral and attitudinal match.
[00:18:54] For the goal we're aiming for, we make decisions from a place that creates what we want in the future instead of making decisions and handling things in the same way we always have, which will just creative more. More of what we have right now when we're behaving in a way when we're acting like our future self.
[00:19:15] When we're asking our future self for answers, we're teaching other people to interact with us as the person we wanna. and we also see opportunities around us that match what we're trying to create in our future. I was just talking to my brother who got a big promotion and I was asking him, Hey, like, how's your day-to-day going to change?
[00:19:38] How's it going to be different? And he said, it's not really because I've already been doing all of the things that I'm going to do in this promoted place. I decided to do that a long time ago. I just decided to act like. Job, act like the person that had the job that I want. And he is been doing that for a long time.
[00:19:56] So now he's just promoted into the job that he's been acting like a match for a really long time. And that's something that you can really use in career. So envision that future self and act like her. Be like her. You're already her. So find the answers that your future self already knows. Do it every day.
[00:20:18] See what she. And let me know how it goes. All right. Next week I'm going to share with you this wildly fascinating idea about future thinking and how to do it. This is the good stuff, y'all. Enjoy it this week. Enjoy life from your future. And I will see you next week.
[00:20:47] Thanks for hanging out with me friends. If you like today's episode and you want more of them, please take two minutes right now to subscribe and give me a five star review on Apple Podcasts. Then send this episode to a friend. See you next time.