089: Unicorning in ENM: Navigating Couples’ Dynamics, Self Awareness, Communication and Safety feat. Summer

Elle and Vee have Summer back for an encore episode after she shared her experiences as a trained submissive under two doms in Episode 088: Inside the Mind of a Sub.  This time, she discusses her experiences and the lessons she's learned from being a unicorn for an array of couples with lots of different dynamics, and the girls put in their two cents from their own experiences.

How do you become a unicorn in the ethically non monogamous lifestyle?  (1:46)

Navigating couples’ dynamics as a unicorn and establishing your boundaries. Why you should keep texting in the group chat. (9:12)

Deferring to the wife/girlfriend, and holding their feelings in high regard. Feeling thankful for being invited in. (16:07)

As a husband/wife or girlfriend/boyfriend: the benefits of playing separately as a unicorn. (22:20)

Playing with a couple when you’re more attracted to one person than the other. (27:01)

BDSM vs ENM: rough sex vs vanilla sex. (32:30)

Questions to ask as the couple, and as the unicorn, before playing. (34:23)

Best threesome positions. (42:50)

Meeting couples on apps. Overcoming past experiences and being a couples’ first. (46:42)

Listener question: tips to stay safe when meeting new people as a single unicorn. (49:59)


What does this lifestyle (ethical non monogamy) bring to your life in the absence of having your own primary partner? (1:00:26)