A Contagious Smile Podcast
Gratitude Amidst Life's Echoes: Navigating Loss, Family Dynamics, and the Warmth of Renewed Love
When the warmth of gratitude meets the realities of life, we find ourselves sharing a space where laughter mingles with tears, and strength is drawn from the most poignant stories. Victoria and I are overwhelmed with appreciation, standing proud in the top 1% of podcasts, and it's all thanks to you—our unwavering support system. Our journey takes a touching turn when we recount an interaction with a fellow amputee, laying bare the harsh truths of living with loss and the power of community care. We then tackle the emotional whirlpool of family dynamics, from honoring cherished ones within the constraints of health and finance to discussions about the effects of toxic relationships that can overshadow the innocence of childhood.
The heart of our discourse beats to the rhythm of personal and professional growth, as we navigate the delicate dance of emotional boundaries with our children, especially those with special needs. Victoria shares an intimate moment of parental support prior to a medical procedure, while I open up about our evolving working relationship, peppered with playful debates over titles and shared responsibilities. We also delve into the dark allure of narcissism's impact on families, serving up personal stories that paint a vivid picture of the cold indifference narcissists can exhibit. Despite the heaviness of these topics, gratitude remains our steadfast companion, as we remember past assistance that shone like a beacon during our darkest times.
Closing on an uplifting note, we reminisce about the annual tradition of renewing marriage vows and the sparks of creativity that keep love's flame alight. We're not shy about sharing our quirks, from pronunciation disputes to the charming idiosyncrasies that make our relationship unique. As we look ahead to new ventures like a podcasting camp for teens and literary achievements that touch hearts across generations, we invite you to join us in celebrating the milestones, musings, and unexpected delights that life throws our way. So tune in, and let's continue this wonderful ride together, with stories that resonate and connections that endure.
When the warmth of gratitude meets the realities of life, we find ourselves sharing a space where laughter mingles with tears, and strength is drawn from the most poignant stories. Victoria and I are overwhelmed with appreciation, standing proud in the top 1% of podcasts, and it's all thanks to you—our unwavering support system. Our journey takes a touching turn when we recount an interaction with a fellow amputee, laying bare the harsh truths of living with loss and the power of community care. We then tackle the emotional whirlpool of family dynamics, from honoring cherished ones within the constraints of health and finance to discussions about the effects of toxic relationships that can overshadow the innocence of childhood.
The heart of our discourse beats to the rhythm of personal and professional growth, as we navigate the delicate dance of emotional boundaries with our children, especially those with special needs. Victoria shares an intimate moment of parental support prior to a medical procedure, while I open up about our evolving working relationship, peppered with playful debates over titles and shared responsibilities. We also delve into the dark allure of narcissism's impact on families, serving up personal stories that paint a vivid picture of the cold indifference narcissists can exhibit. Despite the heaviness of these topics, gratitude remains our steadfast companion, as we remember past assistance that shone like a beacon during our darkest times.
Closing on an uplifting note, we reminisce about the annual tradition of renewing marriage vows and the sparks of creativity that keep love's flame alight. We're not shy about sharing our quirks, from pronunciation disputes to the charming idiosyncrasies that make our relationship unique. As we look ahead to new ventures like a podcasting camp for teens and literary achievements that touch hearts across generations, we invite you to join us in celebrating the milestones, musings, and unexpected delights that life throws our way. So tune in, and let's continue this wonderful ride together, with stories that resonate and connections that endure.
How do y'all Welcome to another episode of Contagious Smile Unstoppable with my wife, the lovely Victoria.
Speaker 2:Such a good name.
Speaker 1:Why are you such a guy in the background? So what's up with you two, Speak up so everybody can hear you.
Speaker 2:Hi baby, baby, baby.
Speaker 1:You're talking to the world and thank y'all very much. We're still in the top 1% of the most listened to podcasts and it's only because of y'all, y'all, listen they love us they love you.
Speaker 2:I want to take a minute and thank you, buddy, for telling my husband that he is amazing and we have such great chemistry together, because he doesn't listen to me when I tell him that. But he had such a nice gift the other day and it was a celebrity who sent us a message and said how awesome we were. And he actually sent a message to my husband telling him happy birthday. Then he kept saying what great chemistry we have together and he loves hearing us. That was awesome, frank Wilder.
Speaker 1:He's been in a ton of movies. He's been in a ton of movies. He's been like 100 in there.
Speaker 2:He's best known for like Pulp Fiction. Pulp Fiction, a cult classic. Everybody should watch Pulp Fiction Career Opportunities. He's been on a lot of TV shows too. You've seen his face, you've seen his head.
Speaker 1:But he said, my husband has been thanking him for all he's done and happy birthday and just all sorts of sweet messages and how great we are together.
Speaker 2:And then I interviewed- a lovely lady.
Speaker 1:I want to say thank you, mr Wilder. Okay, so, thank you, buddy, I appreciate you.
Speaker 2:And then I interviewed a lovely lady whose podcast just came out, laura, who told me right off the bat, before we even recorded, how much she loves us, and she even did it on the recording time.
Speaker 1:Okay, so two people.
Speaker 2:No, two people and like two dates. Okay, I'm going to bring Dave Campbell involved. I can name drop all day long about people who say that we are awesome together on air, so why can't you just take it as a compliment? You already have a good day. Why do you want to put vinegar in the mix?
Speaker 1:This beer's nice.
Speaker 2:That's the best part of your day. That's the best part of your day is your beer, no, I woke up.
Speaker 1:Hey, if I'm up right and breathing, that is a good day. Nothing else great happened to you today I came home to see my wife, my daughter, freaking awesome we put an update out about everything that went on on our GoFundMe and we want to thank everybody who has been generously donating.
Speaker 2:It does make a huge, huge difference, because I had two surgeries coming up and, as my husband said in his update, I refuse to stay in the hospital because I will just like any of my other surgeries, including my amputation, and then I refuse to take any payments. Can we talk about the gentleman you met today and you know it's one thing to live with an amputation. It's another thing to hear from someone who is also an amputee and give them an insight.
Speaker 2:My husband has known me forever and he knows that my pain. Tolerance is stupid, I mean really but he met. I can't help it that I don't have a high IQ.
Speaker 1:And y'all, when I say IQ, she has three dollars.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, here we go with the honorary crappy gym Anyway.
Speaker 2:So, like I was saying, you met this really nice gentleman who was telling you about his journey down the road of amputation and that he is on a regimen and I, everyone I've talked with that is an amputee, is on a regimen of pain management and, like everything they go through, you know they have stem routers which, as we know, I've had four and they had. You know they have around the clock pain medication distribution and I've never taken the first pain medication and he even told you that even with all the payments, it doesn't really help him. And he's a what kind of entity is he?
Speaker 1:So I hope this individual you know they'll probably be in this podcast because I gave them one of my cars today- I'd love to talk to them.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'll try to set it up for you. You're welcome, dear. So the individual called me to his house to fix his garage door. I work in garage doors in the daytime. Can I say that on there, okay? Fixes a garage door. I work in garage doors in the daytime. Did I say that on there? Okay? And you know, just speaking with him because he was sitting in a wheelchair covered up in the blanket and I have no tact, y'all.
Speaker 2:None.
Speaker 1:None whatsoever. I will tell you you've got a booger hanging out your nose, your file and zip You've got to stick with the tape. Yes, your horse is trying to come out of the barn, that sort of thing. Oh my God, I believe when he asked it to him what happened. Why are you in a wheelchair?
Speaker 2:You have no tact about the body like today.
Speaker 1:That's it. That's exactly how I asked. I looked him straight in the eye and asked him Some people would be offended. We're both men Well that's how I asked what happened Go ahead. So he uncovers a blanket and says I have an invitation. I said well, and I continued to look them in the eye. I said was it gallbladder gangrene or diabetes? He said it was diabetes.
Speaker 2:Was it above the knee or below?
Speaker 1:It was just below and it was still wrapped up and he said this has been a year ago. And I said I'm inquiring because I saw the gloves from the door and want to know if you needed help with medical supplies, because you know we've been known to obtain medical supplies that we can help pass around that are not used by other individuals. And that's how it led into a conversation about his patient.
Speaker 1:So he said it's diabetes and he said it's still weak, it will not heal up, even after a year, right, and he proceeded to tell me that they're trying to get him to amputate the other one and he has refused because he's been through this for a year. To get him to Amputate the other one, and he has refused Because he's been through this for a year and he doesn't feel any better.
Speaker 2:He probably feels worse Because he's fought her hell.
Speaker 1:And then they drop the bomb on him and they think that you know, the longevity Might be cut a little short. For what reason, I don't know.
Speaker 1:I don't want to tell his story if he wants to come on. Uh, I don't want to spoil it for you. Uh, he was a really nice guy, I won't miss his name, but I hope he comes on with his wife's there listening. I hope y'all come on and tell your story correctly. But you know I I told him that, hey, make sure you have you know my wife's, apparently, but make sure you have you know, while you're in your right frame of mind, you're not in a stressful environment at the hospital. You know your survivors have to, and so he was.
Speaker 1:Even though I don't have tact, I come across, you know, kind of honest and I think that's why I'm people respond to. So his outlook was kind of dire to me and I felt my heart went out to him. So I say, oh, what he didn't. I think that's what happened. So that's, that's that story for that guy. You know it's sad. You know what? I drank a lot of beer, 270 pounds. You know I'm not a real fat guy, but you're tall. I could watch what I eat and drink, because I don't. I don't want to lose weight, you know, I don't want to lose a leg.
Speaker 2:You know I don't want to lose an arm.
Speaker 1:Thank, you. And I told him. I said my wife says she'd rather lose both legs than her arm.
Speaker 2:What did he say about that?
Speaker 1:He said I've heard that a lot. I told him this we're now advocating for amputees.
Speaker 2:I'm actually certified amputee coalition here in Charleston.
Speaker 1:So, regardless, y'all get your paperwork, your wills, your trust, everything.
Speaker 2:Just get it all organized and important, but do me a favor, because so many people have listened to us. They're family amputees. What did he tell you about the pain of Chris?
Speaker 1:Because some people oh, he said in the description. He said that he is on a regiment of and and I want to say this word opioids. I said that right, y'all Pain meds that he takes so much of it it doesn't even help now, and it's been a year y'all, how much of addiction would you have if you took everything they prescribed to you? I mean, you took everything they prescribed to you I mean I paid for the first pill, right?
Speaker 1:If you took everything they prescribed, you have some strong barbiturates and opioids and all that hoo-ha. Yeah, my wife wanted to take the CBD gummies, y'all. No, I mean, the most I've ever seen her take is an abnil. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And that took a lot to get me to do that. That's why so many people have spouses or family members and they get to the point where it's routine they see that individual that's amputated and they just get to the point where they're like, oh, they're fine now it's been X amount of time since the amputation and they can't be hurting anymore. Blah, blah, blah. That's what I want to do, to share what this gentleman said about his pain, because it never goes away. And I tell you every day that my heart goes out to these people, because one thing my husband will tell you is I don't complain about it because it doesn't make a hell of a bit of difference.
Speaker 1:It's not going to make the pain, go away, I do y'all, I complain.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:My daughter says I'm a big baby. That's unfortunate she doesn't use that word.
Speaker 2:But I don't think legs doesn't make a difference, but I'm here to tell you. There's not a day that goes by. I don't wish that I had made a different choice. I didn't have a choice that made a different choice. I didn't have a choice. I'd be interested to see if he has CRPS. I have CRPS. It could be everywhere. Well, when?
Speaker 2:I mentioned that he didn't comment. You mentioned CRPS, yes, well, some people have it, some people don't, and once you get it, you can't get rid of it. And it's not something you want Like you try to run from it. No pun intended. Not something you want Like you try to run from it. No pun intended, but literally.
Speaker 1:I had a blind date.
Speaker 2:What foreign country was she from?
Speaker 1:Y'all hear how speechless he was for 4.2 seconds. What foreign country was he?
Speaker 2:from. I don't know. Did he have a tree with him? I do not recall, ma'am. Did he have a big, big six in the back?
Speaker 1:I did not inhale.
Speaker 2:Yes, my husband used to like assorted chocolate box. Oh, we're talking about invitations. Yeah, you're the one who brought it there, not me. And then you finally got white chocolate and now you love it and you've never walked out of chocolate yet. It's a metaphor You're like peppermint padding. Why am I peppermint padding? I can't wait for this, because you're white and you're redhead, I'm just a white peppermint pad.
Speaker 1:I can't wait for this, because you're white and you're redhead. I have a redhead pad. Where's your peppermint? Then, just be peppermint. Okay, you're a spirit, I'm going to be spirit. Well then, be peppermint, just be mint.
Speaker 2:Can I be strawberry friendly?
Speaker 1:No, that's too. That's too much sexual.
Speaker 2:Anyway, the pain doesn't get better, it gets worse over time. It doesn't calm down, it doesn't I mean, there are times that even my therapist will come up to me right beforehand and he'll come up and put his paw on my leg or try to come up next to me, because my limb whatever you want to call it I'm not going to explain it, but will start looking as if it's having a seizure and it starts sporadically adding thoughts like pulsing.
Speaker 1:It's a spasm.
Speaker 2:Right, but then there are times I try to move it but I can actually like make it move where my fingers are.
Speaker 1:I can make that part where my index finger move right there, how many people are shaking their heads?
Speaker 2:yes, another arm amputee everyone I get to talk with and everything is well. I've reached out to a couple you've got 40 million listeners. I've reached out to a couple. I've talked to a couple. Everybody that I've talked to a couple, everybody that I've talked to, is late.
Speaker 1:If you are missing an arm or hand from birth or some stage of your life, reach out to Victoria.
Speaker 2:But it doesn't get any better. The shrinkers are excruciating and, if you remember, I didn't do any physical therapy and they didn't push me to do it. I didn't go to this. The only thing I went to was my prosthesis and that was to build my prosthetic and it's a beautiful piece that decorates on top of these because I can't wear it. You know, for those that don't know, I have a shoulder replacement and I'm not allowed to carry more than 10 pounds on this arm and my prosthetic with everything in it is like 15, so it's excruciating and like, literally, you have to make your mind move this thing and it's tiresome. And I have been very lucky with the fact that I've read so many stories of people where they have infections in their nubs and they get you know all these different things going on with their nubs and they're awful. I've been very lucky because we haven't had that. What are you doing? I'm going to pen, see, oh, speaking of I do's here. You want a pen?
Speaker 1:See, oh, speaking of I do's here.
Speaker 2:So we are renewing our wedding bells again. We do it every year. Why did you say it like that again? Because I am very honored and proud to be doing it again.
Speaker 1:I love to do it, it is.
Speaker 2:So we do this every year so that we technically stay newlyweds, even though the playful banter we have will never be a problem, and we're going to be doing that here coming up in the next few weeks. We have a wonderful woman who has been doing this. That's a beautiful gift for us basically every year. I won't tell you her name, but Angela, I don't think people in like Tahiti heard it, so that will be happening here at the very end for sure.
Speaker 2:So that will be happening here in the very near future and we're trying to figure out if you guys have some ideas about faith what we can do. We were going to celebrate from everything she ever came and she was better going to go because she hasn't healed up enough to make anyone, including Mike and I, feel comfortable enough to hurt and her doctors agree, so she's not able to go.
Speaker 2:so then we were looking at maybe taking her to one of her favorite little concerts, which would have been New Kids on the block when they come in a couple months and doctor says she can't be around that many people or in a large crowd because of her own immune system. So we're striking out every which way possible in order to try to do something amazing, fun and celebratory when she's talking so, if you have any, ideas, let us.
Speaker 2:We're trying to come up with something that's not costly, since we're still on this road. These other two surgeries my husband has to go to work for two days. Luckily they're not back to back, but that's coming up in the future. So that's all of this. Now can we please talk about some of this bullshit that's going on everywhere about this? What about the guy that I don't want to give all the information out on? Oh, because he bought a sunless fat.
Speaker 1:That his six-year-old or two-year-old?
Speaker 2:No, the two-year-old couldn't get his juice box fast enough because dad murdered him.
Speaker 1:That is insane.
Speaker 2:I mean, that is Two years old. Two years old couldn't get his juice box. I would have taken that child, raised that child and given that child a home. But I mean seriously, what if that freaking dumbass person's dad or mom did that to him? You know, like you think about that for a minute, that's your child and you're going to kill this beautiful, innocent child who's done nothing, did not ask to come into this world and you killed his kid because he didn't get his juice box fast none of us can I cannot wrap my head around psychology, psychiatry.
Speaker 2:You know, I've been even doing courses that just make me dumbfounded, like this emotional incestual I always try to say it differently incestual relationships, I can say incestual sessions where a parent has an emotional relationship unlike parent and child, but more like spouse partners, and that's creepy.
Speaker 1:I mean that's just creepy so the parent treats their child like a spouse and does everything with them, even to the point of possibly physical contact yes, and it might not be actual intercourse, but things like and does everything with them, even to the point of possible physical contact.
Speaker 2:Yes, and it might not be actual intercourse, but things like rubbing each other, doing things like sleeping in the same bed, going on vacations, just the two of you. One of them is very codependent on the other one. The child never grows up realizing how they could have been a child, because they're always held this other way. You know, like I know, I'm no contact with my biologicals, but there is no way I would have ever like my bio dad and I, years, years ago I can't tell you how long, but went to go see my grandmother's best friend before she passed away and we drove down there together and we stayed in one of those what do you call it? The?
Speaker 2:no it was like a suite that had the pull-out bed and the den or whatever, and then the bedroom. It was like a room that you could pull out the couch and then there were doors and then there was a bedroom. Right, but like you, I was a broke joke when I was young. You couldn't have paid me money to get in there and say the same thing, or rub his back, or rub his back or rub his feet or what. There is no way in hell that I would have ever, never, ever, ever, ever, and it is done we're out now.
Speaker 1:it's okay to a certain point, because you've got kids. They're scared of the dark, they're scared of thunder.
Speaker 2:You know it's so different.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's a limit when the child reaches a physical age or a mental age.
Speaker 2:Or if there's special needs, it's a total deficit division Right.
Speaker 2:You know, like you have a child, say, for instance, faith totally different situation, right, you know, like you have a child, say, for instance, faith faith is of age, but mentally she's not. And when she has a procedure or something the night before, she always wants me to give her cuddles, and so I do and I snuggle her, and she always feels better when she has either mommy or daddy's thumbs, and it's because mentally she's a child. You know that's not the same thing. This is like laying in bed and rubbing your feet or rubbing your backside or things like that. That you and I would do as a married couple or dating or in a relationship is essentially what it is it's called?
Speaker 1:what again? Emotional, emotional.
Speaker 2:I'd say you have three freaking doctorates.
Speaker 1:You go to four Ivy League schools. You can pronounce every medical terminology there is Like that. See who says that no, and I bet you could say fragilis-is-of-out-backwards.
Speaker 2:You can say it backwards, which is socialis-is-of-frag-al-is-of-out-backwards. That's not what you just found.
Speaker 1:You can't say that.
Speaker 2:It's incestual. I have 20 pictures.
Speaker 1:I made them Like anybody's going to give you slack. Anyway, you've got one arm. You sit here on the computer for 27 hours a day. Yes, you've written 28 books. I actually more.
Speaker 2:I didn't know that. Son of a. I hate you. Son of a, keep your secrets. You know what's so funny? This is hilarious. My husband and I are Hi. Bro, are you ready, are you?
Speaker 1:ready.
Speaker 2:I'm going to see you. I'll work a book.
Speaker 1:No, you didn't. No, you didn't. You just love the Hispanics.
Speaker 2:I wrote an ESL. Is that your ring finger? No, no.
Speaker 1:I wrote an ESL workbook for elementary kids.
Speaker 2:It's super cute. I'm going to be publishing it here soon. It is it's super cute. It's working on all the fundamentals of things. It's over 100 pages. Of course, all my workbooks are.
Speaker 1:It's super cute so if y'all haven't recently been to our website, please get on there at contagiousmomcom and look at everything that my wife does, or the plethora of services she has and there's more to follow on the other website Is it up yet. No, no, you're selected. What do you do? Sit around all day. You sit on your butt all day.
Speaker 2:And negotiate. I think it's a good negotiation to is safe. We will not discuss why not, because we can't. Okay, you don't want to bring it up Because you don't give me enough credit on my negotiations Woman, I give you all of it.
Speaker 1:You do not. You are everything. I'm the president, Ah.
Speaker 2:CEO is above the president. I had this company before you and I were even about to get it. I found it Really, and whose company is it now Mine?
Speaker 1:I'm sorry I didn't stun her.
Speaker 2:Oh, I just got heartburn.
Speaker 1:I'm a bitch, so what's yours and mine? What's mine and yours.
Speaker 2:It's on both of ours, but I found it. You just said Presidente, which means it's mine. So if you don't want to give kudos to our, kudos to student, then I'll say, hey, it's mine.
Speaker 1:I found it which was what?
Speaker 2:again it says President.
Speaker 1:It says Michael.
Speaker 2:And then it says founder and CEO is me.
Speaker 1:I didn't do this.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to go there. Why would you?
Speaker 1:be here. Have you seen you? Yeah, of course I have Everybody who sees you on the website. They know your lustrous eyes and my ass hasn its own zip code. They can see your ass, but it does have its own zip code.
Speaker 2:It does have its own zip code. It's great when the air is over. So let me ask you how do you feel about this follow-up book that I haven't yet finished? I'm working on a book cover. It's kind of really getting to me because I can't get it just the way I want it.
Speaker 1:The guillotine would be too nice.
Speaker 2:No, the top of that.
Speaker 1:Yes for the individual, I think it's a pretty cool.
Speaker 2:Certain body parts first. I go back to the essential thing. It's pretty cool as to how the pictures began to be used and you know people look. When you're house hunting and you're looking from the outside, looking in, it looks one way, but when you've moved in and you're really there, that's when you really understand the concept of daily life. And what most people don't understand about narcissists is that they're only there for themselves and if you can't provide something that they want, they have no need for you. And a lot of times the cruelty that they put upon you in return is god awful. Like they'll stop speaking to you, even if you're in the same dwelling. They will stop speaking to you because you did not fulfill a need that they had like giving them an excuse to form someone else, another woman, another man, whatever the case may be.
Speaker 2:Um, you were never good enough. There's the roles of the black sheep and the golden child, and it's it. It is sick and demented and twisted and it really does put you on a path where I guess one of the things I always say when I'm on these other shows is that if I could do anything, it would help these adults where they don't have to spend their adulthood recovering from their child, because it's hideous. That's why I'm so glad our kids won't be having to spend their adulthood recovering from their childhood, because if you really love your kids.
Speaker 2:You never feel that I mean, if any of our kids, let's not even go there, let's go. Let's go for a minute to your brother. I hadn't met him yet years ago and he got an accent immediately. I was like, let's go, what does he need? Let's go, let's get down there, we go, let and we go. You know we were sending stuff down there to the family every day. I hadn't met him and that.
Speaker 2:How do you want to say it? That they literally almost died, and they know this for a fact and they don't reach out, they don't try to say anything, they don't try to do anything. But you know how do you do that? As a person, as a parent, as a grandparent, whatever the case may be. How do you know that your grandchild is laying in the hospital bed fighting for their life, already almost passed, and you don't even try to see them. You don't even try to, you know, check on them or see how it's going, no matter if there's no contact or not, because really, in the whole scheme of things, still are you really not going to reach out and just anything. And then you know, forget that I was advocated and there was not even a check on that one, which you know. You do it to me, please do it to me instead of my child, because, or our child, because you know I've had this my whole life.
Speaker 2:But when you don't even check on our kid, when, let's say, since December, would you safely say she's had 30 surgeries, safely, yes, we've been in the hospital. We've been in the hospital basically since December and I never came home. I stayed as well the entire time, as others who know me well know. And you can't even check on faith. You can't say, oh my god, how many times has she coded, how many times she's in complete organ failure? She could need a kidney transplant, all of these things, and it wasn't. You know the fact that, you know that this is going on and you can't even check on them. I mean, okay, tell me from a man's point of view, a father's point of view whatever.
Speaker 2:How can you do that? How can you?
Speaker 1:do that. I don't know. That's a lot more than that trumps checking on your blood and skin.
Speaker 2:What could possibly be more important? I don't know. For over five months. I don't know, and here's what's worse. You've seen him. You've seen my bio Dad Numerous times, Like at least three since this all started and never once correct me if I'm wrong. I'll eat my words. Never once has he ever asked you never, never never asked you how she's doing so?
Speaker 1:I'm curious in your book you uh the upcoming book you speak about where this originates, from, how one becomes narcissistic.
Speaker 2:I do.
Speaker 1:Like from childhood or middle teens or what Is it developed later on in life? Do you get some power under your belt.
Speaker 2:It's different. It's different for every person. I remember asking my grandmother how could my vile father be so different than they are? She goes well, I can say the same and I said how could that be? When you raised him, and she was like I could say the same thing for you and I didn't understand that. I was too young, I didn't understand that.
Speaker 2:But with money, I mean, you've been to their house because it's, you know, and I'm forever grateful they did help let us to their house, you know, and I'm forever grateful they did help let us stay there in a time of need and I'm very grateful for that. And you know what? I'm not going to sugarcoat anything. It didn't seem different, but it came at a very high price. It did, and what they did, they let us stay there. And their house is not small. I mean, that's a very safe thing to say. Their house is mansion size and we had our own side. We didn't even, you know, interact very much and I'm forever grateful that they gave us that opportunity.
Speaker 2:Everything was happening with even anyone in the family, like, and that's the thing is that you've said to me so many times why do you care? Like, why do you care? And it's because I'm not wired. If I was, I wouldn't care, but I asked my husband if he had seen him. Does he look okay? He's healthy is. Is he doing okay? I know, I know. I know he hasn't asked about me and I know he doesn't care because he hasn't asked about me and he walked away from both myself and Faith and that's fine.
Speaker 2:It's hard for me to even comprehend why you know, and Faith held no filter when it came to them because she didn't like how I was treated. She didn't like how she got treated. Faith was constantly used as an excuse to cover for other women and that made it very challenging. So it's a big deal the whole narcissistic thing.
Speaker 1:How many of y'all listeners can relate to what my wife just spoke of? How many of y'all have read her book? Who Kicked First? Which is you know? Like she said, the next upcoming book is you know a prelude of the book, who Kicked First mood of the book First. So you know, as my wife has already put out there, y'all contact us. We want to hear your side also.
Speaker 2:From an officer's point of view, and a male point of view and just a person's point of view, without saying names. What is your opinion of both of them?
Speaker 1:Without saying names Honestly and just honest, pos at the very least such definitely the the biological father. If you want to say that biological sperm builder, at the bare minimum, should be incarcerated, at the bare minimum, okay, because of all the shady shit that he's done probably his entire life.
Speaker 2:So, but, the one thing is and I've heard it so many times while through the abuse and so many other times in my life is why do you have so much proof of everything? It's like you know, and it's because always, always, always, it's put on us that we're not telling the truth, that we're making it up, and so I've always kept proof of everything, absolute, hardcore proof. No question, it's not a, he said. She said it is a you know, black and white here. It is no holds barred.
Speaker 1:So many times.
Speaker 2:I took the stand as a police officer and I had to defend things.
Speaker 1:That I saw police officer and I had to defend things. That I saw the report, that I gave my training, my background. I had to bring all this to the surface and explain why such and such happened, why I saw this, what I observed blah, blah, blah. And I'm the one. It felt like I was the one on trial, I was in the hot seat and so, time and time again, I had to prove why. Why did you arrest this dirtbag? Why did you apprehend Joey Bag of Donuts? Why did you throw him in lockup? You know blah, blah, blah. So you're absolutely right. If y'all are out there and my would tell you, get your proof safely.
Speaker 2:Uh, she can guide you how to do certain things and but even when you do have your proof, you're still made out to be a liar, like I wasn't even around when certain things transpired and I'm still put there at length. And even when they got proof that I wasn't the one, even though they knew I wasn't, there was never an apology, there was never anything, because that's not within their word of house. You know, and I remember when I was even younger like if somebody made them mad, especially my dad, somebody made him mad I would go and tell them I'm sorry for whatever it was and I would take the fall. And if I did it, just so he'd stop ignoring me as a child, you know, just so he would stop doing whatever. He used to put me on top of an ottoman, or I mean an armoire and lead me there, and he didn't care. He was leading me there, you know.
Speaker 2:And in the summertime I used to try to make myself throw up, so I didn't have to go to the pool with him because I didn't want to be out there, because I remember he was in the pool and he sneezed. And he sneezed one time and I said god bless you. And he said if you open your mouth again, I'm gonna pinch you for every word you say. And he sneezed again a few minutes later and I said, bless you. And he came over and pinched me twice and I got bruised and I do bruise easily. I'm not making that as an excuse and you know, he talked and treated me so differently and he has no relationship really with either of the other two siblings so I used to literally make myself throw up so I didn't have to go out in the pool with him because I just didn't need to be there and he has no relationship with any of the children at all.
Speaker 2:And you know, the thing is is that I have all this truth and I've never taken it to the other siblings because, like my bio brother, I wished him nothing but the best. You know, he's incredibly book smart. He really is. He doesn't have a clue, he really doesn't have a clue. But I don't want to cause him distress. I don't want to cause him any ill will, even though the hands down, I've improved how they both lied to him repeatedly. Um, something so simple like a sticker got put on his car and I was accused of it and I said I didn't put the sticker on the car. And he and I don't speak to each other, and so I got accused. My mom got really mad, started accusing me, started accusing Faith of going into the car and putting that in the car, and I was like we didn't do it, and so it ended up that it got into a heated discussion.
Speaker 2:I went outside where my bio brother was our bio mom and I was like I'm not the one who did it and it got very nasty because, well, nobody else would have done it, only you. And I said why would I go in his car? Anyway, this just escalated, escalated, escalated. But I had proof in my phone where our bio dad opened the car door. Stick her in hand and put it on there.
Speaker 2:I have it to this day. I have the picture and he put it on there, but he wouldn't take accountability. I got accused and it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It's the simplicity of things like that that has kept all of us away from each other, because they hear every here's one thing they don't care, like flat lies have been told me my brother, and he has no idea, none I.
Speaker 2:I can prove all of it. But it doesn't matter and I don't want to cause him any anger, I don't want to cause him any ill, will you know, I don't want him to hurt himself, I don't want anything negative to happen to him, even though he thinks that I'm the world's worst person in America because of what he's been told. Right, but every time he's ever been sick or something has happened, you know, I've been fucking center making sure he's okay. But then I read messages that he has no idea. I read about things he has said about me. He has no idea because he thinks that what he says to his bio mom is kept private. But it wasn't and I have all the proof in the world. But I mean it's irrelevant and I don't want to do anything that would cause some. I don't. And you know, am I innocent? No, I'm not. I'm not at all, because I was very ill about how he treated my daughter. But you know, nobody's perfect in it. I accept my responsibility and I'm not perfect. I get it, but that doesn't mean I want to think I have to have to go and do that.
Speaker 2:And you know, I do have remember having a conversation with him, the one time we actually had a conversation where I told him that I don't care who he's with, as long as whoever he's with treats him with respect and doesn't put their hands on him in an unwarranted manner. It didn't matter his sexual preference or choice, and I told him, as long as he was happy. You know, the family, parts of the family were absolutely against the fact that he was gay or is gay anyway. Would you talk about something else? Because now I realize that I'm just going wrong about this, because I feel like the only way if I, if there's like the tiniest chance that he listens to this, but you know, I mean I don't care, as long as he knows that.
Speaker 2:You know I'm not trying to like cause a rift between him and his mom. I'm not trying to cause a rift, even though there's so much proof you know there's so much proof, there's so much proof. I just want him to know. I know he's a really smart kid, I know he doesn't deserve what he thinks is not going on. That's all I'm going to say Now. I'm going to be quiet and let you say something. I'm good.
Speaker 1:Don't pinch me.
Speaker 2:I'm just kidding.
Speaker 1:I will never hurt you. I know you wouldn't. You're the love of my life. You muscle me. We might get married here again very shortly, in a couple weeks. As y'all know, every year we get married.
Speaker 2:That's all I said and we get new rings every year and they're not expensive. They're like $20 tungsten rings, but it's just about you know, we pick different ones and we put them on. My husband has built this beautiful tree.
Speaker 1:I'm still building it.
Speaker 2:And it's amazing and we're gonna put all the other rings on there.
Speaker 1:It's a tree of life, that is made out of big, big wire and I've got all the, all the readings, all but one, what I think you have somewhere, and we're gonna just put them on each branches.
Speaker 1:You know, our, our next 150 years go by and we're still together and we'll still get married every year. So yeah, I was. Uh, I came home from work one day and I was telling my wife that my knees are really killing me. Oh, they're popping, they're grinding, you know, they're really hurting. I'm having to use a filler to go down on one knee when I work on the job. And I said this is how I do it, you know, because every time I go down, and she turned around and I went down on one knee. I said this is how I do it, because every time I go down, she turned around and I went down on one knee. I said when I go down like this, it's you, mary and every year he has a different way he's done.
Speaker 2:But you know, what you don't know is that you proposed to me on May 9th of this year, and last year you also proposed the first year we got engaged.
Speaker 1:You proposed me, I don't even remember that. I never done.
Speaker 2:I don't, don't ask them, and you know what people think my memory is a gift, it really isn't. A lot of times it is not I know, and that's what sucks.
Speaker 1:I wish I couldn't.
Speaker 2:I could forget a lot.
Speaker 1:I've seen gender where and you get another degree or doctorate or whatever. I wish I didn't have it. I don't know, it's not natural. You're an alien or something, I don't know. That's really sweet. That's what I tell your kid. She's an alien. Now she's my kid. She's your kid when she's an alien Now she's my kid. She's a good kid she is. Don't tell him about it. I think it was totally my dream, oh shit. So, yeah, so, and it'll be on my birthday. Yay, I'm so happy.
Speaker 2:It's better than the alternative. What 51. Then we better than the alternative what 51?
Speaker 1:51. Then we won't be getting married.
Speaker 2:I'll go to the graveside.
Speaker 1:You'll go to the graveside and ask me to marry me and then, before you send me, home. That's so weird. Do it, I dare you. You ain't got the gahones. You don't have the gahones.
Speaker 2:You know damn well I will.
Speaker 1:I know our daughter hates Gahonys.
Speaker 2:Oh sorry, business.
Speaker 1:Oh, yes, anyway, so when?
Speaker 2:this book gets finished. Are you going to read it?
Speaker 1:No, you won't read this one. Perhaps you won't.
Speaker 2:If you allow me, I want to read this one. Will you allow me? No, since you're the CEO, this one.
Speaker 1:Do you allow me? No, since you're the CEO, you're learning O-M-G's. Oh my good, gideon.
Speaker 2:Oh, while we're doing that, I have something to ask you. You didn't mean to say anything.
Speaker 1:Does it involve baby oil?
Speaker 2:Oil Crick. What is a crick Before I?
Speaker 1:ask. Everybody knows what a crick is. Cricket A crick?
Speaker 2:Before I ask Everybody knows what a crick is A cricket A crick Crick. We need to have our word of the podcast for you, because people your buddy Jeff's already wrote it all down Crick yes Creek no crick Creek, yes Creek, like a brook.
Speaker 1:Like a small stream Stream Feller.
Speaker 2:Feller.
Speaker 1:Okay, proceed.
Speaker 2:I want to know, and now I'm only asking you in front of 41. I want to know if you will write a little inscription in this book about it before it gets published.
Speaker 1:An inscription.
Speaker 2:You know how I wrote Debbie's book for her. Kind of like an overview of what the book's about. Try to read that thing first, then you have a or you can just give me the Jeff notes. No, you should read it.
Speaker 1:All right, what type of I have your word? Yeah, my word. Oh, I gotta shake hands, my word, my word ain't gonna do word. Oh, I gotta shake hands. My word ain't gonna do it.
Speaker 2:Then you spit on our hands. You spit on our hands. I have one hand not hands.
Speaker 1:That's the only way I'm shaking Our hands, our hands. Woman, I'm gonna cry. No, don't be fainting, I have to be fainting.
Speaker 2:Also, we're thinking of doing, uh, all these other things coming up in the summer. Y'all have some suggestions, like you're going to do a podcasting camp for kids, um, so that teens can learn, oh my gosh, we have to go live.
Speaker 1:We have to do video now for you, yahoo or youtube or whatever.
Speaker 2:It is video now for you yahoo or youtube or whatever it is so be watching for that.
Speaker 1:Yay, oh, you can sing woman. No, yes, no, you sing like the 1-900 operator. Oh my god, I, I do not. Oh, yes, the melody that comes out of your vocals, oh my goodness.
Speaker 2:You can put it competitively against Nora Jones. That's sexy. Would you put it up as equal? Yes, no, you would not. Back in the day, you would be like when you heard Nora Jones come on.
Speaker 1:Nora Jones she's sexy singing. Her voice is just See you didn't describe my voice like that. Oh, yes, your voice.
Speaker 2:You didn't describe it. I said 1-900.
Speaker 1:Okay, but you wouldn't say Norah Jones, why didn't you call 1-900?
Speaker 2:I don't remember that.
Speaker 1:You want to dial it? No, I don't know, it's still functioning.
Speaker 2:Have you ever done it?
Speaker 1:No, you want to dial it? No, I don't know, but it's still functioning. Have you ever done it? No, I've done it, but I haven't.
Speaker 2:Oh no, you didn't just compare me appropriately Like do you think Nora Jones has a 900-number sex voice, singing voice thing? You give her a 10. What?
Speaker 1:would you give her?
Speaker 2:No, wendy.
Speaker 1:Houston's like a 50. No, yes, she is. She had the most beautiful singing voice. Some songs to me, some was not. Some of them were just too squeaky.
Speaker 2:If you mention the other one, I don't like at all.
Speaker 1:I will not mention Shakira, I promise.
Speaker 2:I was talking about Nick Cannon's baby.
Speaker 1:Who's that?
Speaker 2:Mariah.
Speaker 1:Carey.
Speaker 2:I can't stand her. She could beg to come on the show and I wouldn't.
Speaker 1:Who Shakira?
Speaker 2:Or Mariah Carey Really. She can't go to jail.
Speaker 1:Seriously.
Speaker 2:Yeah, tax phone.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's right.
Speaker 2:What would you do? That's stupid. What is it about Shakira that you like so much? Because she's Hispanic? Christina Aguilera.
Speaker 1:Just like I like the wings at Hooters Just the wings. What's that? Look for y'all?
Speaker 2:You might be sleeping in the downstairs, in the cold room.
Speaker 1:For the record, I haven't been Hooters in probably 18 years.
Speaker 2:Uh-huh.
Speaker 1:Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Speaker 2:What they come to you. They were delivered. No.
Speaker 1:If you suggest that. No, no, you gotta quit while you're ahead. If you suggest that, no, no you better quit while you're ahead.
Speaker 2:Ha ha, that's alright, y'all.
Speaker 1:So thank you for listening to uh. Let's gather for an hour. An hour it's been about an hour. For what An hour it's been about an hour, hasn't it?
Speaker 2:Who the hell taught you some of these words?
Speaker 1:Miss Ladd in kindergarten.
Speaker 2:Miss Ladd, so really was her name Miss Laid.
Speaker 1:No, I had a Miss Ladd at the time. I bet you had a thought no, she was nice. I've seen mislap. I bet you had a thought no, she was nice.
Speaker 2:I've seen some of those.
Speaker 1:Anyway our hour's up. Thank y'all for listening. Y'all please go on a contagious smile. Dot com. Check out everything top to bottom. All tabs Click on all pictures if they're clickable pictures like a picture. All hyperlinks click on everything, because my wife literally works her sitting ass off up here on this website and the future website.
Speaker 2:I work, my fingers to the wrong love it.
Speaker 1:I love you, I love you more. And please go to Amazon and pick up our book, boot Kick First by Victoria Thuray, and pick up our daughter's book. Y'all y'all don't know how much it makes my daughter happy. She has more than one book. She's my daughter right now. She's mine, because I'm proud of her. Pick up her book. I Am Kitten Dad's Girl and dang proud of it. She super wrote it just for me and it's all about me and I love it because she analyzes me Too much.
Speaker 1:So y'all pick up those two books, cook it first. And I am kidding. I met one of my customers who actually read the books and she was like almost 80 and she loved it. She said it was so adorable.
Speaker 2:We went to face otolaryngologists and the what?
Speaker 1:Otolaryngologists, otolaryngologists? Can you Otolaryngologists, otolaryngologists, otolaryngologists? How do you say this shit woman.
Speaker 2:Otolaryngologists Ar woman Otolaryngologist, arto Otolaryngologist.
Speaker 1:Otolaryngologist. Okay, I'm going to drink another beer.
Speaker 2:We went to her otolaryngologist and he walks in and he was like I love the website and I freaking love the book and he specifically went through and named and discussed some of the I Am Kitten book to her and he was like I freaking love it because I went around and told my girls because he has four girls. He's like, hey, where's mine?
Speaker 2:you know, and he was like I love it, I love it, I love it, it's amazing. And then she told him about the other book she did. It's on Amazon, about a little girl who goes through surgery for the first time or her first IV and how she gets through it. So he was like now I got another one to go read and so it's like just do that. Oh, and I didn't even tell you.
Speaker 2:I had to show you this picture when I took Faith last week for our most current lab checks. Right, we're at the hospital and we're doing labs and stuff, and she's sitting there and she's talking and the lady keeps looking at her and this other lady is just like, why is she looking at this girl so differently? And she keeps talking and talking. And then she goes. You just are really familiar to me. And then all of a sudden she goes oh, I know who you are.
Speaker 2:And of course they just sport in her contagious melty tuck shirt on and she goes I have listened to your podcast. And she's like oh, okay, thanks, have a good day. And she starts to walk out and they're like no, we need a urine sample. And she's like so she grabs the thing. She didn't say that, oh yes, she did and I'm behind her and we come back and Faith puts the urine sample down on the thing and the nurse comes over with, like a paper towel out of the you know whatever dispenser and a pen. Just can I have your autograph? And I took a picture of faith giving an autograph right next to her that's hilarious.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, we gotta push that and she was like oh she's like I'm gonna save some of her hearing like she's looking at me going oh are you.
Speaker 2:And she, faith, is looking at me like mom faith hates being uh uh infamous or well.
Speaker 1:She wants to help other people.
Speaker 2:Yes, she doesn't want to be in the background. No, she does not want to be the center of attention for it at all. Let me see where is this picture at. It was hilarious and she is literally like they were looking at her and they knew her and they knew her voice. And she looks at me and she goes not a word. And I was like what do you mean? Not a word, what is? I said, what if I have a few words and she's like I mean it here? There she is, there's.
Speaker 1:I've had the most of the year oh my gosh did she wrote her name. Oh, that's hilarious right?
Speaker 2:yeah, no, she did, and come on look that's so fun.
Speaker 1:It is on a piece of paper towel right there.
Speaker 2:I don't know, maybe frame it well, that's all they had right then, and that's what she did. And oh, she was like not a word, what? So maybe maybe, knowing how you are and how I am, we might have walked down the hall and I was like celebrity, my room celebrity and she's like stop it, I don't want to be famous, yep yeah, so now we're over in our finance. I'm not at work. Can you say specific, specific? Yeah, so now we're over an hour. I'm not at work, can you say specific. Specific Specific.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Specifically what Not? Pacific, it's not the ocean, yes, pacific Pacific, that's what I said.
Speaker 2:Say it again Again Specific.
Speaker 1:Thank you all for listening to.
Speaker 2:Unstoppable.
Speaker 1:Victoria.
Speaker 2:I'm very off the market. No, longer will be approached by the man husband or man oh yeah, I know someone who had their first, uh, pressure yeah, he's done.
Speaker 1:Spoke about him on the air, so y'all tune in next time.
Speaker 2:And please go to the website tell my husband to get his head out of his butt. He is going to go make an appointment. He's going to call an obstetrics you don't hit that stop button you need to call an obstetrics.
Speaker 1:They've heard enough. Stop, end recording. Thank you, goodnight y'all.