Have you ever stood at the edge of a life-altering decision, heart pounding with a mix of dread and excitement? Yeah, of course you have, you ARE human after all! I'm Sally, and in our latest episode, I get real about the push and pull of change.
Together, we'll navigate through the reasons why stepping into the unknown can be downright terrifying, yet utterly transformative. We're talking about the comforting lies of routine, the paralyzing grip of fear, and the illusion of control that keeps us tethered to the familiar. But here's the truth—stagnation hurts more than the leap ever will. Let's unwrap the growth and deeper connection to self, that are often just one brave step away.
I'll take you through TEN reasons why people may struggle with change, FIVE ways that hurt ourselves when we resist change, and offer TEN steps that you can take to enact change and embrace a whole new way of being.
Ten Reasons Change Is Hard:
Fear of the Unknown Comfort Zone Loss of Control Risk Aversion Emotional Attachment Past Experiences Perceived Threats Lack of Awareness Inertia Cultural Norms
Five Ways We Resist Change:
Missed Opportunities Stagnation Limited Perspectives Emotional Well-being Missed Personal Development
TEN Steps To Embrace Change:
Self-Reflection Set Clear Goals Create A Plan Seek Support Embrace Flexibility Challenge Your Comfort Zone Practice Self-Compassion Visualize Success Celebrate Progress Stay Persistent
Final quote from this episode comes from Barak Obama:
"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek."
Remember to come like our FaceBook page to stay connected.
Have you ever stood at the edge of a life-altering decision, heart pounding with a mix of dread and excitement? Yeah, of course you have, you ARE human after all! I'm Sally, and in our latest episode, I get real about the push and pull of change.
Together, we'll navigate through the reasons why stepping into the unknown can be downright terrifying, yet utterly transformative. We're talking about the comforting lies of routine, the paralyzing grip of fear, and the illusion of control that keeps us tethered to the familiar. But here's the truth—stagnation hurts more than the leap ever will. Let's unwrap the growth and deeper connection to self, that are often just one brave step away.
I'll take you through TEN reasons why people may struggle with change, FIVE ways that hurt ourselves when we resist change, and offer TEN steps that you can take to enact change and embrace a whole new way of being.
Ten Reasons Change Is Hard:
Fear of the Unknown Comfort Zone Loss of Control Risk Aversion Emotional Attachment Past Experiences Perceived Threats Lack of Awareness Inertia Cultural Norms
Five Ways We Resist Change:
Missed Opportunities Stagnation Limited Perspectives Emotional Well-being Missed Personal Development
TEN Steps To Embrace Change:
Self-Reflection Set Clear Goals Create A Plan Seek Support Embrace Flexibility Challenge Your Comfort Zone Practice Self-Compassion Visualize Success Celebrate Progress Stay Persistent
Final quote from this episode comes from Barak Obama:
"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek."
Remember to come like our FaceBook page to stay connected.
Hi there, lovelies. I am thrilled to have you back with me here on the Reverse Recept Restore podcast. I'm Sally, and this is the place where change can happen, and that is exactly the topic for today's episode. Change, which means we're taking ownership and accountability for our lives through challenging our thoughts, mindsets, feelings and behaviors. So if you're ready to own your narrative and rewrite the story of your life, let's do it together. Change comes from within. Change is painful, but nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don't belong. This quote from Mandy Hale sets the tone of today's episode.
Speaker 1:
I want to talk about how our resistance to change can be a hindrance. We all know people who are stuck. Maybe we are that person stuck in a half-life, stuck tethered to the past, stuck fearing for the future, stuck in jobs we hate or places we don't want to be. We're stuck in unhealthy relationships, but stay with a million reasons or excuses, and yet none of those reasons ever underline our fear of change. And when I talk about unhealthy relationships, I don't just mean romantic ones or toxic family dynamics. I mean friendships and workplaces and the one we have with ourself. So, instead of stepping out, we stay stuck and at place of not belonging but belonging anyway, because we're stuck, like everyone else who chooses to be stuck, over changing.
Speaker 1:
Now, me personally, I've always been a sucker for change. I embrace it in many areas of my life, but then I am also a stickler for the familiar in other ways. Weirdly, I don't seem to have a problem stepping off the ledge into the winds of change when it comes to the big things like changing jobs or moving countries or trying lots of new things, as you may have guessed by all the different tips and techniques I talk about in this podcast. But take me to my favorite restaurant and you'll be hard pressed to see me order anything that hasn't become my go-to meal. Call it habit or comfort or just knowing I like what I like.
Speaker 1:
There is a little bit of a nickel against change with those simple things in life and, as this last year has proven to me, with a full-on commitment to changing myself, my self-talk, my thoughts and beliefs and behaviors, this internal change work is intense and the perfectionist in me has a short fuse when it comes to self-discovery and recovery change. It wants the work to be done in absolutes. It longs for healing, to have uprooted and tossed out once and for all, all of the yucky stuff that got trapped within the very fiber of my being like debris after a storm. It wants it all gone permanently, finished, finito, done and dusted. But this is not how any of this works. My dear friends, there are rare occasions, of course, when you do receive immediate healing in your life from something that may have been an affliction. But at least in my experience and I suspect, despite how often I feel so vastly alone, this is your experience too.
Speaker 1:
Change is something that happens with time and consistency and persistence. Change is constant. It's really the one thing that doesn't actually ever change its consistency, and for a lot of people, change is a really challenging and scary thing and we don't want to do something or we are afraid of what might or will happen. If we do, we can quickly slam on the brakes and put up roadblocks to prevent change from occurring. This, of course, is self-sabotaging 101, and many of us are masters at it.
Speaker 1:
One of the best lessons I learned about change came from my mother. I was working as a waitress and doing long hours. I mean 18 to 19 hour days, long hours. I loved the job, but my poor feet did not by the time I got home at night, I was just one big pulsating pain, even though, with my hours, I wasn't seeing much of well anybody. Apparently, every time I saw my mum, I would complain about my sore feet and legs. Now, as it turns out, my mother happens to be as wise as Maya Angelou, because one night she said, almost word for word, the same thing. This quote from Miss Angelou If you don't like something, change it.
Speaker 1:
If you can't change it, change your attitude. Now, I'll admit, in the moment it was a bit of a slap in the face when all I wanted was sympathy, but it was exactly what I needed to hear and, being the change champion I am, I took it on board. I couldn't change the job. I was only working there for another month before I was heading back to the states and back to college, and I needed every spare cent I could get. So changing the job wasn't an option, which left me with the only other alternative changing my attitude. And so I did. And guess what? My feet actually stopped hurting as bad because I had changed my attitude and my body followed suit. If I had resisted that change, I would have kept myself in pain, but I chose to empower myself with what I could do within my control. In this case it was my attitude, and when that shifted, things improved.
Speaker 1:
Have you ever noticed a pattern of resistance to change in your life or for your life? I'm going to give you an opportunity right now to see if you can recognise yourself in the following 10 reasons why people may struggle when change comes along. Number one fear of the unknown. Change often brings uncertainty about the future, leading to anxiety and resistance. People may prefer the familiarity of their current situation, even if it's not ideal, over the uncertainty of change. Number two comfort zone. Humans are creatures of habit that's why I mentioned my meal and they often feel safe and secure within their comfort zones. Stepping outside this zone can feel well scary and threatening, and obviously uncomfortable, leading to resistance.
Speaker 1:
Number three loss of control. Change can sometimes feel like a loss of control, especially if the change is imposed rather than voluntary. People may resist change because they fear losing autonomy or influence over their own lives. Number four risk aversion. Change inherently involves risk and some people are more risk averse than others. They may resist change because they fear potential negative outcomes or failure.
Speaker 1:
Number five emotional attachment. People often develop emotional attachments to their routines, their environments and especially their identities. Change may threaten these attachments, leading to resistance as individuals seek to protect what is familiar and dear to them. Number six past experiences. Negative past experiences with change, such as failed attempts to change or traumatic events, can create a reluctance to embrace new experiences. People may resist change to avoid repeating past mistakes or experiencing further discomfort. Number seven perceived threats. Change can be perceived as a threat to one's status, relationships or sense of self-worth. People may resist change if they believe it will undermine their position or identity in some way.
Speaker 1:
Number 8. Lack of awareness Sometimes people resist change simply because they don't see the need for it or understand its potential benefits. Lack of awareness or understanding can lead to skepticism and resistance to change. Number 9. Inertia Change requires effort and energy, and some people may resist simply because they prefer to maintain the status quo rather than invest time and resources into something new. I guess you could think of this as the if it's not broke, don't fix it type of mentality. And number 10.
Speaker 1:
Cultural norms Cultural norms and societal expectations can really influence our attitudes towards change. In some cultures, there may be such a strong emphasis on tradition and stability that leads to resistance to change because it could potentially create problems, especially in the family dynamics, even causing the potential for people to be ostracized from their culture or their society. Give me your honest answer how many out of these 10 reasons did you find yourself agreeing with or recognizing were patterns in your life? Perhaps, if you're feeling brave enough, you can come find the post with these 10 reasons on our Reverse Reset Restore Facebook page and leave a comment about which one most resonated with you or which ones you've seen being played out by other people in your life. So once you are aware of what your resistant triggers may be, you are in a much more powerful position to do something about it. The next step is seeking to understand. Understanding these reasons can help us address our resistance to change more effectively and implement strategies to facilitate smoother transitions from where we are right now and where we want to be. Once we understand what might be holding us back, we now get to choose.
Speaker 1:
Now, most people act like they are victims of circumstances buffeted about by forces beyond their control. It's easier to blame others for why we stay stuck in one of those 10 reasons. Our resistance offers us a familiar comfort and it means we don't have to take on any accountability. But this resistance to change can be harmful in so many ways. It hinders our personal growth, it keeps us from experiences and opportunities, it forces us to remain in a type of limbo where our past hurts preside over us, and it limits our potential to become the person who we could always be. Here are 5 ways that we hurt ourselves when we resist change.
Speaker 1:
Number 1. Missed opportunities. By resisting things that can genuinely help us, we risk missing out on valuable opportunities, whether it's new job prospects, educational courses or personal relationships. Our fear of change can prevent us from experiencing growth and finding fulfillment. Embracing these opportunities, even if they seem unfamiliar or challenging at first, opens doors to new experiences and potential success.
Speaker 1:
Number 2. Stagnation. Resistance to change can lead to stagnation as we become comfortable with our current circumstances and avoid stepping outside our comfort zone. This stagnation prevents personal growth and it limits our potential to acquire new skills, expand our knowledge and just generally develop as an individual. It is only through change and adaptation that we can truly thrive in life. Number 3. Limited perspectives. Being resistant to new ideas and perspectives often leads to a narrow mindset. By sticking to the familiar and avoiding change, we restrict our ability to see things from different angles and consider alternative solutions. Embracing new experiences and perspectives not only broadens our horizons, but also enables us to approach challenges with creativity and open-mindedness.
Speaker 1:
Number 4. Emotional well-being Resisting things that can help us often stems from fear Fear of failure, fear of the unknown or fear of stepping outside of our comfort zones. However, continuously resisting these opportunities can contribute to increased stress, anxiety and feelings of discontentment. By embracing change, we can cultivate resilience, build self-confidence and foster a more positive mindset, which, in turn, promotes overall emotional well-being. And number 5. Mist personal development. Personal growth is an ongoing journey that requires embracing change and learning from different experiences. By being resistant to things that can actually help us, we hinder our personal development. Through new challenges and opportunities, we have the chance to learn valuable lessons, build resilience and discover our true potential. It is important to understand that growth and progress come from stepping outside our comfort zones and allowing ourselves to grow. So, now that we've looked at 10 reasons why we keep ourselves from moving forward and 5 ways that those reasons can hurt us, I want us to focus on what we can do to move beyond the reasons and the fear and choose change. Here are 10 steps to embrace change. If you are a regular listener, you might find these familiar, but repetition is key to building new foundations on our healing journey. By reinforcing these steps, we empower ourselves to root out our old habits and strengthen our resolve for positive transformation.
Speaker 1:
Number 1. Self-reflection Take time to reflect on your current situation and identify areas where you feel dissatisfied or unfulfilled. Ask yourself what changes you would like to see in your life. Number 2. Set clear goals. Define specific, achievable goals that align with the changes you want to make. Remember to break these goals down into smaller, manageable steps to make them more attainable. Number 3. Create a plan. Develop a detailed plan outlining the actions you need to take to achieve your goal. Set deadlines and milestones to track your progress along the way. Number 4. Seek support. Surround yourself with supportive friends, family members or mentors who can encourage and motivate you throughout your journey. Consider joining support groups or seeking professional guidance from a life coach or a therapist if needed.
Speaker 1:
Number 5. Embrace flexibility. Understand that change is often accompanied by uncertainty and discomfort. Practice flexibility and adaptability in the face of challenges or setbacks, and be willing to adjust your plans as needed. Number 6. Challenge your comfort zone. Step outside of your comfort zone and try new experiences that align with your goals for change. Embrace opportunities for growth and learning, even if they feel unfamiliar or intimidating. The key here is that the new experiences align with what you're wanting to do and achieve in your life, the goals that you've set for changing your circumstances or your behaviors, or your habits or your opinions of yourself, whatever it is. You don't have to just go and try everything to combat your comfort zone. You can, if you want, if that's something that you feel is going to help you improve the skill set. But really it's about going. Hey, I know where I want to go and I look at the steps that I need to get there. Yeah, that's going to make me a bit uncomfortable, but I'm going to do it anyway.
Speaker 1:
Number 7. Practice self-compassion. Be kind and patient with yourself as you navigate the process of change. Acknowledge that setbacks are a natural part of the journey and treat yourself with compassion and understanding. This is what I was trying to refer to a little bit before that I'm really having to work on this concept of practicing self-compassion because I've done all this work, I've worked through a whole lot of stuff in my life and I think, yes, it's resolved, I've got through that. I've broken that off my life. I'm no longer feeling x, y, z and everything goes really good for a month or two.
Speaker 1:
And then the niggling comes back, or a circumstance or a situation happens and I am right back where I thought I had like left off and got rid of and got through. And that's where that impatience can come in and that anger and annoyance and frustration that why the heck am I back here? Why is this not resolved and dealt with? So practicing self-compassion when you have these moments and you will have them is so important, because when you practice self-compassion, what you're doing is you're allowing yourself to acknowledge hey, I'm a bit disappointed that this situation I thought I had healed from has fled back up in my life. But instead of being angry about it or being disappointed it's okay to be disappointed but to not stay in that disappointment Instead of staying stuck in that disappointment or getting upset or whatever the emotions that are going to come out with it, allowing yourself to acknowledge hey, you know, I thought I doubt with this, but obviously there's still deep rooted stuff that this is now giving me a fresh opportunity to address again.
Speaker 1:
It's kind of like feeling like you're the handkerchief in the magicians trick, you know the one where they just keep pulling the scarf or the handkerchief, the colored cloth just keeps coming out and out and out, and it's like this never-ending stream of colored cloth. That's how it can feel when you're doing the change journey, because you think, oh yep, we've reached the end of that cloth. Oh no, there is another one right behind it. But if we can look at that as an opportunity, go okay, cool, I have doubt with this and I got through that and I can do it again. And so maybe this new problem or situation or challenge whatever you want to call it is providing me a new, fresh opportunity to clear out some more of this gunk that I didn't even realize was still there. What a great way to re-look at the situation and recognize that it's okay to be battling the same thing time and time again, because every time we battle it and we win over that battle, you know we will win the war the next time it comes up. We know the tools and the techniques that we can use or we can consider how else we can go about this to heal from the certain situation to one day there being no more gunk coming up, because it's clear, and practicing self-compassion by being generous and loving and kind to ourselves will help us through those change moments.
Speaker 1:
Number eight visualize success. Visualize yourself achieving your goals and experiencing the positive outcomes of change. Use visualization techniques to reinforce your motivation and keep yourself focused on your objectives. If you want to learn how to do a vision board, feel free to check out our vision board video that's out on the youtube channel. We've also done a couple of episodes on visualization and I've linked them in the show notes.
Speaker 1:
Number nine celebrate progress. Celebrate your achievements and milestones along the way, no matter how small they may seem. Recognize and appreciate the progress you've made towards your goals and use these victories as motivation to keep moving forward. Something as simple as keeping a journal so that kind of helps you keep on track of what you've achieved, can be really helpful for you to be able to celebrate your progress. And number 10 stay persistent. Stay committed to your goals and persist in your efforts, even when faced with obstacles or challenges. Remember that change takes time and effort and stay focused on your vision for the future and I know this is a big challenge of mine because I want things to happen yesterday. By following these steps you can empower yourself to embrace change and take proactive steps towards creating the life you desire. In the accompanying blog post for this episode, I go into a bit more detail with these 10 steps, why they work and how you can implement them into your life in a practical way. The blog post always drops on a Wednesday, so I recommend you bookmark the reverse, reset, restore site, which I've linked for you in the show notes, so that you can return to it when you have some time.
Speaker 1:
Embracing change is not merely about adapting to new circumstances. It is a profound shift in your mindset and perspective. It's about letting go of the resistance that holds us back, that fear, and taking ownership of our lives, including the choices we make and those we don't. As we journey through life, we encounter countless opportunities for growth and transformation. Sometimes change is thrust upon us unexpectedly and other times we actively seek it out. Regardless of how change manifests in our lives, our response to it is what, ultimately, will shape our experiences and define our path forward.
Speaker 1:
Letting go of that resistance to change requires us to release the grip of fear and uncertainty and embrace the unknown with open arms. It is a process of surrendering control and trusting in our ability to navigate whatever comes our way. By relinquishing the need for certainty and predictability, we open ourselves up to endless possibilities and potentialities, and that is a truly beautiful way to live and be. And yeah, it's scary as heck at times too, and that's okay. It is okay to be scared.
Speaker 1:
Taking ownership of our lives means accepting responsibility for the choices we make and recognizing that even the choices we don't make have consequences. It's about acknowledging that we have the power to shape our reality and create the life we desire, one decision at a time. Owning our choices empowers us to live authentically and align our actions with our values and our aspirations. You deserve to be the master of your own ship, the captain of your own design. I'm going to close this episode with a quote from Barack Obama, and it feels very much in line with the quote we began this episode with. In fact, all three quotes used today are pretty direct, and sometimes we need that too. I love this quote and I hope that you'll reflect on it over the coming days and that it inspires you in ways that will delight and surprise. Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.
