[INTERVIEW] From Cheer Competitions to Podcast Mics - Self Acceptance and Confidence with Noel Roberts-Coley

In this episode, we cover: 

• Meet Noel Roberts-Coley, podcast host and founder of Diamonds AllStars Competitive Cheer.
• Courage to pivot both personally and professionally
• How to reshape the conversations you have with yourself
• Power of trusting your gut

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Want to Connect with  Noel?
IG: https://www.instagram.com/noelrobertscoley/
Listen to Noel's Podcast: This is For Us

Remember that, you are worthy. You have value. You get to take up space in this world simply because you exist. Don’t let anyone, including yourself, convenience you otherwise. If that idea or vision for your life is in you, then it is for you.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:06

Hi and welcome to the have the Audacity podcast, where we are all about living our own version of our best life. My name is Jacey. I'm a multi-passionate human obsessed with personal growth, and I want you to come on this journey with me, where we share our stories and learn tools, tips and tricks to live the life we were always meant to live. So let's lean into the uncomfortable celebrator highs and embrace our lows, because all of it's important. It may get a little messy, but it's time to have the audacity. Hey, audacious Human, I am so thankful that you're here and I am so excited to bring you today's conversation. So I get to introduce you to Noelle Roberts-Coley she. I heard her guest on another podcast that I listened to and immediately as soon as the episode was over, I reached out to her on Instagram and asked her to come on, because I knew I had to get her in front of this audience. You needed to hear her.

Speaker 1: 1:09

So this is a conversation with Noelle Roberts-Coley, and she's a podcaster, a coach, she's founder, a founder and a motivator of women. She as the founder and CEO of Diamonds All Stars, an all-star cheerleading gym located in Knoxville, tennessee. She has dedicated the past 14 years to creating a second home environment for young athletes. Her commitment lies in building a place where youth feel seen, welcomed and safe in their true selves. Noelle emphasizes the value of hard work, resilience and the importance of both leading and supporting within a team. Her work fosters confidence and self-worth in young athletes, shaping them into empowered individuals. She's a well-respected voice in her field. Noelle is frequently invited to speak on topics like resilience, teamwork and empowering women to feel seen, heard and valued. Her experiences and insights continue to inspire and influence the next generation of leaders, and she has taken all of this and now has a podcast called this Is For Us, and it was such a life-giving conversation and I'm so excited for you to get to hear it.

Speaker 1: 2:21

So, without further ado, let's dive into today's episode. All right? Hey Audacious Humans, I'm super excited for today's conversation. We have Noelle Roberts on the podcast. Noelle, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here and before we hop into this conversation, can you tell the listener a little bit about who you are?

Speaker 2: 2:42

Yes, absolutely so. I am a pretty new podcaster. I'm the host of this Is For Us podcast. I started just a couple of months ago. It has always been my dream and I started this Is For Us. Have loved every single second of it. And then the other piece of my story is I am the owner of Diamonds All Stars, which is an All Star cheerleading gym located in Knoxville, Tennessee, and I've been doing that, for this Is my 14th Year that is a long time.

Speaker 1: 3:16

That's so cool, though, and so I just love everything you're doing. I told you before we hopped on about how I heard you on another podcast. You have to come on and talk about just who you are. Your energy is so amazing, and I love getting to have conversations with people who are doing the thing they're meant to do in their life, because it just shines through, and so I just want to say I see that, and so I'm always curious, because my podcasts have the audacity People who heard that name come from, so I'm really curious when did your name for your podcast this Is For Us come from?

Speaker 2: 3:50

So where I got the name for the podcast is I try my best to do everything based on feeling. I'm very much a person that I need to feel it in my body, in my gut, like if something gives me goosebumps or if it comes to me whenever I'm asleep. And I have a hard time making decisions sometimes because if I don't have that like aha moment, I don't feel like it's right. And so I knew I wanted to start this podcast Again. It was my dream, it was on my heart, but I was like what is it going to be called? What would the cover look like? You know, I just had all these questions that I needed to make sure that it was, to me, perfect. And so another place I get a lot of ideas is they just come to me in the shower.

Speaker 2: 4:31

So I'm standing in the shower one day and I'm thinking about my podcast, I'm thinking about what I want it to do, who I want it to touch, and I start picturing the people who I dream of listening to it and I say it's for women and it is, it's for everyone, but it's really geared towards women and the problems that, the problems, the emotions, everything that we face. So, anyway, I'm sitting in the shower and I'm going who am I talking to? Like, who is it? And so I start picturing different women and all walks of life. I'm picturing the girl that's going into high school. That has no idea if she fits in or not. I'm picturing the girl who is just graduating college and it's supposed to be the greatest day of her life, and she comes home and she sits down and she looks around and she goes what am I going to do now? What is my life? What is my identity? Who am I? What am I doing?

Speaker 2: 5:28

I'm picturing the 30 something, 40 something, 50 something that is either hates their career and wants a new one, or is going through a divorce, or is wondering when they're going to meet the person of their dreams and get married, the new mom that feels so alone. And all of a sudden I was like this is for us, it's for all of us, and I get goosebumps every time I talk about it. But that's the whole reason I wanted this podcast is because all of us are so much alike and I don't think it's talked about enough that even if we're in college, or if we're newly divorced, newly married, new mom, whatever don't ever want to have children, whatever it is, we feel a lot of the same emotions and go through the same struggles, and I just don't think that, with the world as it is today, that that's presented enough to us. So, yeah, it's for us, and I think we're all so much alike.

Speaker 1: 6:22

I love that. I even just had goosebumps, like you explained. I'm like, yes, that's so perfect, like it is, it's for us and that's such a beautiful thing. And so I'm really curious and I know sure you can speak to this. You have your and it's not like small, like you're 14 years in the cheer world, you're cheer coaching and that's huge. And then you have this podcast and we're kind of in this age where people are like niche down, focus on one thing, stay in one lane, be really good at this one thing. And then I feel like people get nervous when they're like, okay, but I really want to do this, and it doesn't like obviously go, because your podcasts are not coming on talking about cheer leading, right, you know, like that is not, that's not what it is, but like you're holding space for both. And so what would you say to the woman who's like I have this career and I really have this other dream on my heart that I want to do, but they don't go together? What would you say to her?

Speaker 2: 7:22

That's such a beautiful question and my answer to that is sometimes I think that we have to be and I actually actually did a podcast episode on this and I feel very strongly about it. Sometimes I think we have to be this before we can be, that you have to go and be certain things in your life before you have the wisdom, the knowledge, the bravery, the courage whatever you want to call it to start becoming that you know, that you dream of. I think that we can pivot at any time. I think that we never have to choose one lane and stay in it. I think that is something that we are told. That is very that. It's just not true. I think we are allowed to dream. I think we're allowed to chase dreams. And then also, you know I know that this isn't the story for everybody, but for me, having this podcast has always been a dream, but I think it directly correlates with what I have done with all star cheerleading, and I say that because you know, yes, I'm an all star cheerleading coach.

Speaker 2: 8:21

Diamond's All Stars is my heart and soul. I walk into that place every single day and feel so guilty that it's what I get to do as a job, as work. But I also spend time, and I have a lot of boys in the gym. So it's not all about women. I want to be clear about that. But I spend a lot of time with teenagers, with young people. I spend a lot of time with their moms, you know. I see things with their siblings, their families, their friends. I hear stories about school, you know. And then I've done it all too. I've been through all those phases of life, and so I think that from all the things I watch and I see and I learn, I have to realize, like, if it's on my heart, I can do it. I witness these things, I do these things every day. So if it's on my heart to provide that my knowledge to someone else, then I can.

Speaker 2: 9:13

So I think we can't be afraid to pivot. If something's on our heart, just because it's not our lane, we just have to make another lane and we can have two lanes. We don't have to just stay in a single lane highway for our entire life. We can have as many lanes as we want to open it up to. And that's honestly what I believe. And if I'm being honest, I'm still telling myself that every day. I'm still telling myself all the time like Noel, yes, you are a podcaster now, you are doing a great job, you can do this. I think we beat ourselves up a lot, and whenever we move into another lane, I think we start going do I really belong here, or should I go back to my single mindset? And so I'm still coaching myself on that every single day, so I'll let you know how it goes, but I'm trying really hard to work through that.

Speaker 1: 10:01

I appreciate your transparency because I was going to ask that, so I think we need to hear that as women, I mean the community for this podcast. It is for everybody, but it is predominantly geared toward women and we need that reminder of what you're going through is not really unique and the fear of pivoting.

Speaker 1: 10:19

even if you pivot a lot of times in your life, you still go through that. Is this okay? Am I? Should I be doing this? You still have all that come up, and so I appreciate your vulnerability and transparency, just being like I'm going through this right now.

Speaker 2: 10:33

Yeah, and again, I'm all about transparency. I think that that's what the world needs. I think, just like you said, your situation is not unique. And the thing is is that sometimes I think somebody could take that as maybe like a negative way of thinking, because on one side we're told we're all unique, we're all this, we're all that, but really we're all going through these struggles and our struggles are not unique to the next person.

Speaker 2: 11:01

The person that we're looking up to, that, we think, has it all figured out, that has their entire life together. We don't know what that person's feelings are at night. We don't know what she's staring at the ceiling thinking about. You know, somebody might look at me and go, oh, she's a podcaster, she started this podcast, she knows exactly what she's doing. Well, and really I have no clue what I'm doing.

Speaker 2: 11:18

I just get up every single day and hope to figure it out a little bit, more and more each time, and you know, I again I was scared to open up my lane to add another one, but I was like it's on, it's my dream, I have to, I've got to do it, and what's the worst that can happen? You know? I think we have to ask ourselves. That question, too, is what happens if you start a podcast and all of a sudden you don't love it or it doesn't. You know, do what you deem as well. You go back to the drawing board, you pivot again, and then again and again until we always do. And if we don't keep pivoting, then we're just living the same life every single day, and that's no fun, right.

Speaker 1: 11:58

Exactly Like what? What's the point? Like we need is one of those things I find so interesting in conversations with people is like we're scared of change, we're scared of being uncomfortable, but also we're miserable if we're only comfortable. It's like we crave it and then we get it and we're like, oh no, maybe I don't. It's like, yeah, but experience.

Speaker 2: 12:17

That's. I love the way that you just put that, 100% Exactly.

Speaker 1: 12:22

So it's just like normalize that. And even while you're talking, I was like, wow, I see like everything you're talking about and like inspiring, like empowering women with is I'm like, oh, that translates perfectly to cheer, and I don't even know that much like about it. But I'm like, yeah, you're like have your comfortable and you need to. If it doesn't work, you got to try something else and you just keep going.

Speaker 2: 12:43

Yeah, and I'll start cheerleading is so it's. It's funny because when people talk to me about it, it's when you're in the world. It's huge, it's a massive world, it's almost it's a lifestyle, honestly. But then when you're not in the world, you're like what is that? What is? What is that world? So I get, I get the, the not knowing if you're not in it, but it is so much like what we do in all start cheerleading.

Speaker 2: 13:08

I mean, we take athletes, that and again I'm going to speak about, you know, the girls, just because we're talking about women. But they will come in and be the most shy, and I'm talking about a seven year old to an 18 year old. It doesn't matter, I'm not even talking about the age, but they'll be the most shy, unsure of themselves, have a hard time holding direct eye contact, have a hard time speaking up, talking, and then they're there for a year and it's like who is this person Like, who is this young woman Like? Now she's on the stage, she's larger than life, she's found this character, she's found this confidence and I think that we all need that in our lives, like sometimes we. It's a lot of really hard work mixed with the affirmation that we can be anything we want to be. We just have to have the bravery to chase it.

Speaker 1: 14:00

I love that and you know that leads me to thinking. You know the woman listening to this right now who is, like you know, identifies with that like shy and like not really feeling the confidence and like, okay, I want to build my confidence. What would you say to her? What's a good place to start? To just start building your confidence?

Speaker 2: 14:17

I would absolutely say the way you speak to yourself and, again, it is something that I think, as women, we have to work on every day. I am really working hard on this, also because it you have to think about that if you are someone that is really shy or you struggle in social situations or you just have, you're very, have low, very low self-confidence right now Sorry, if that is you, you have to look at the person that you look up to. Everybody has somebody they look up to that they strive to be like. You know that they admire whatever and I promise you that person is not perfect. That person has to, every single day, get up and self-talk. They have to tell themselves that they can do it, that they believe in themselves, that you are beautiful, that you are everything, that you are enough.

Speaker 2: 15:09

You know the negativity that, oh, you're too shy to do that or, oh, you're too uncomfortable to do that, or you're this or you're that the things that we label ourselves as we are choosing to label ourselves as that. So, just like the pivot you and I were talking about, at any time we can pivot who we tell ourselves that we are. So if you get up every day and say I'm actually not shy at all, I'm actually not, I actually live wonderfully in the uncomfortable, I actually am beautiful, I actually am strong, I am a great friend, I am a I'm everything, then that's what you're going to start being, and I really, truly believe that it starts there. If you look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are everything and you walk out with the audacity to live that way and the bravery in yourself to live that way, that's what you're going to attract, that's what the world is going to perceive you as I love that that's such a powerful small.

Speaker 1: 16:05

It's a small thing you do every day, that's easy to implement, but it's going to have such a huge impact. Right, and I totally agree that if you start telling yourself that way, then the world's going to look at you that way too, because you're constantly teaching people how to look at you.

Speaker 2: 16:23

You get to make that choice, 100%. You get to decide. I talked in another one of my episodes about and I hell can I say that Hell, yes still stands.

Speaker 2: 16:33

Yes, you can, Okay, okay, perfect. So that's one of the things I talk about is the hell, yes, still stands. And what I mean by that is I truly believe that, as women, that let's use because of the new year, working out, weight, body image, all that let's use that. So we all almost everybody that I know in my life for the new year, I want to take better care of myself, I want to start working out, I want to drink more water, I need more protein, like all these things we tell ourselves we have to do. Well, so let's say that you have this goal and then let's say that these genes have been really, really tight on you.

Speaker 2: 17:08

And you go up one day you've been working really hard whether working hard is 10 pounds or one, whatever that is and you put these genes on and they button, they fit, and you look in the mirror and you're like hell yes, Look at me, I got these genes on, like I am everything. And then next thing, you know, you get ready, you get your makeup on, you go to the restaurant, to the party, to work, wherever it is you're going, and then you look at someone else, you compare yourself, you walk by a mirror and maybe it's not the best angle. And then all of a sudden you're like I look terrible, I look awful. I cannot believe I wore these pants. I cannot believe I did this. Oh my God, look at me. Or I don't look like her, or I'm not as skinny as she is.

Speaker 2: 17:47

And then all of a sudden, the hell yes is gone, the hell yes that you looked in the mirror that morning and said hell yes, I buttoned these pants, like look what I've done. And now suddenly that hell yes is out the window. And now we're beating ourselves up but like the hell yes still stands. You know, like I feel so strongly about this because you felt hell yes that morning. So just because you walked by a mirror and didn't love the angle of yourself, or just because you're looking at another person and maybe you're not as thin as she is, whatever that, don't take away that achievement. Don't take away the hell yes go. You know what? She looks amazing and maybe my hell yes will morph into that. My goal will be that one day, but for right now I'm keeping my hell yes Because I'm freaking proud. I wish we could do that more as women.

Speaker 1: 18:35

I love that and I love like you're just giving the permission to do that and I think too, you know, with these conversations and you sharing like this, that's how it changes. Like big change happens through these conversations, because you know we're talking about like the new year. I mean, there's so much marketing right now about how you need to change yourself Right, join this weight loss program, join this gym. Like there's something you need to fix. And I did an episode on this and I was, like you know, goals are good. I like to have goals. You need a direction that you're working towards and things, but that doesn't take away from where you are right now, 100% I, and it's almost it's almost overwhelming to the point that it's scary sit-ning I don't.

Speaker 2: 19:17

I don't even know what I want to use, but when the new year comes, it's like we've got to revamp our life. We have to be this and be that and we have to know exactly the path to take and exactly what to do. And if you're not trying to lose weight and you're not going into 2024 correctly and that's not it it doesn't matter if it's January 1st or if it's March 17th. You can wake up and pivot any day that you want. And if you decide that you want to lose five pounds, cool, you can do that next December. You don't have to do that because it's January 1st, nor do you have to go.

Speaker 2: 19:52

You know what I'm going to join CrossFit and then you hate CrossFit, then change it. You're not failing. You're not missing your goal if you decide that you don't like that. Actually, you met a goal because you tried something new. You realized you don't like it and now you're going to change your mind. We get to do that, and being told that we're not doing a good job or that we have to make all these huge life changes on January 1st every year is exhausting. I think we just need to. I think we need to start with the way we speak to the person in the mirror. I think that's a January 1st goal.

Speaker 1: 20:25

I love that and that is a January 1st goal, because if you don't fix that, nothing else is going to work. No goal, whatever you have scaling your business to six figures, whether it's in the gym, whether it's in relationships, none of it's going to work if you're not changing how you talk to yourself in the mirror. Amen, 100%. Because, like it does, it just all comes back.

Speaker 1: 20:47

And that's what I've really been enjoying about this conversation is I've been reading a lot about how big movements change and like changing narratives and, culturally, how things have changed. They start in conversations over and over these little conversations and changing the narrative that way. And then suddenly we're going to look back and be like do you remember when everybody was obsessed with losing weight at the beginning of the new year, and that is very strange that people felt like they needed to wait. You know, like I pray for the day that that that it's so normal to just be like I mean, do what's good for you and change your mind, that we're not waiting until putting so much pressure on new years, and like you don't have to start a goal on a Monday, like you can wake up on a Tuesday morning and be like I want to try this today and do it.

Speaker 2: 21:34

Right, 100%. I always, and I you know even about, even about eating. You know, like, if you're like, I'm going to eat better and then one day you eat a cupcake. Oh well, you ate the cupcake, you get to live, you get to do that. That doesn't mean you failed. It doesn't mean you failed, it just means that you ate a cupcake because you wanted one. Like.

Speaker 2: 21:53

I hate whenever people make it out to be that we set these goals for ourselves and if we don't do exactly the following, then we have failed. But we didn't fail. We're just living and we're just trying to figure it out, one day at a time. You know even relationships, like you just mentioned relationships. I'm huge on this too.

Speaker 2: 22:14

I think that we have to again start looking in the mirror and once we start feeling the self-confidence, the self-worth, the belief in ourselves, it's going to trickle into everything else what we're willing to accept, what we're looking for. If you're someone that's dreaming of a relationship, getting married, you know being engaged, whatever you know, are you the person, when you look in the mirror, that you believe in yourself, that you deserve the world? Are you the person that you think that you are worth everything and the more that you believe how much that you are worth, the more of the beauty that you're going to attract. You know we can't just go, like you said sometimes it's about. I understand that we want to be comfortable, but we crave the uncomfortable. I like what you said was amazing and I think that we have to start with ourselves, because that's what allows us to have the confidence to go into the uncomfortable. That's what allows us to have the confidence that like okay, I'm not trying to go down a rabbit hole here, I'm not trying to like talk in circles, but like, if you're somebody that you're dreaming of getting married and you're going out places and you just want someone to want you, you want someone to be attracted to you, you want somebody to want to be in a relationship with you, to want to marry you Well, but what about flipping the script?

Speaker 2: 23:36

If you're the person that you believe so heavily in yourself and you're worth, you will go. Is this who I want? Is this person what I dream of? Is this person good enough for me? Because, as women, I truly believe we're all running around going. I just want someone to love me. I just want someone to want me. Well, I want him to ask for my phone number. Do I look pretty enough? Is my outfit good enough that he's gonna want my number? Do you think he'll ask me out? Do you want him to, are you sure Like is this guy in the bar right now? Is that Prince Charming? Is that him? Or is it just because that you aren't sure of your words? So you'll take what you can get? Mm-hmm, I'm sorry if I just went into like a complete rabbit hole.

Speaker 1: 24:20

I'm sorry, I thought very strongly about that. No, I love it. And like your passion comes through and I totally agree. And like I was thinking as you're talking about, you know like we go out, like women go out, and you know like is they good enough? Like flip the script, like do I actually want this? And then I think too, we've just it's been so normalized for us to think that way. I mean, if you really like go down the rabbit hole on this, it's like down to. I mean, think about all the movies we watch growing up as women Like Prince Charming needs to save the princess, or the whole woman's princess's plotline was to get the guy and her life's gonna be great when she gets the guy. And it just like messaging everywhere and like not to take away from those stories like I like them.

Speaker 2: 25:07

But you know what I mean.

Speaker 1: 25:08

So then we grow up and we're like, okay, you know, do they like me Right?

Speaker 2: 25:12

Is he gonna chase me? Is he gonna pursue me? I could talk about this for days. That is exactly what we are taught, and the thing is is that I like them too. Who doesn't love the Cinderella story? Who doesn't love the? You know, the? This beautiful princess who is this sweet, beautiful, genuine soul, gets the guy and he loves her and takes care of her and all the things. But where, where is it that we're showing women not even just young girls, but us women that we can also be a badass, we can have all of our dreams and that we get to choose too? Because that is something I mean.

Speaker 2: 25:49

Even, like, think about a job interview and you'll understand that it's. I understand it can't always be this way, you know. But, like, when you go into job interview, what if? What if you don't even want that job but you're just inside? Am I going to interview good enough? Am I going to be good enough? Are they going to like me? Are they going to want me going into a bar, like it could be the worst guy in the world that is literally getting every single person's phone number in the world, but we're seeking validation out of some dude asking for our phone number, drunk in a bar one night, you know, and really he just doesn't even remember who he's asking and we're taking that so personal and it's like y'all, we got to flip the script here. We got to start looking at ourselves going I am worth everything and I've got to find the person who is worth having me in return. The job interview, the relationships, the friendships, the way we spend our time, all of it I think we have to flip it.

Speaker 1: 26:40

And if somebody comes to you and tells you you're being difficult or stuck up or a bitch, they would never say that to a guy who acted that way.

Speaker 1: 26:50

Right, 100%, like I'm always like just remembering. Like you know you take this on and okay, but what are people going to think? Like, who cares? Screw what people think. You're not in control of what other people think about you, so you're going to waste all that energy trying to manipulate other people. Like that's not your responsibility. You show up as you, you know you're worth, and the people who are meant to be their will and people who aren't will fall away.

Speaker 2: 27:16

And I think that's something else that we're scared of. And all these things that we're talking about are things that I've battled through, some still battling through, myself. I think that we sometimes are scared of people falling away. But what if it's good? What if people fall away so new people who are for us can fall in? You know we worry so much about being accepted, but what if we're seeking acceptance in the wrong places?

Speaker 2: 27:43

And another thing, I think, is that, as women, we're always pursuing one of something. You know we're always. We're always pursuing this guy to want us, or this job, or this body, or this, that or whatever, and then we get it and then we're moving on pursuing the next thing. But, like with with relationships, when you start at least for most people, I get some people aren't, don't you know, live this way or believe in this, but when you start dating someone and you get in a serious relationship with them, it's you and that person. So what I'm trying to say is that it only takes one.

Speaker 2: 28:19

So we can't go out and be putting all of our self worth and all these other people who may or may not be attracted to us, like we should be going. I'm going to work on myself. I'm going to believe in myself and my, in my inner beauty, my outer beauty, everything that I am, and then whoever that right one for me in that season, I want them to be attracted to me. I want to be connected to that person, versus us just always be going out searching for something. What if we're searching for memories, for fun, for life experiences, for things we can learn, you know, growing ourselves, instead of searching for validation and another human being or in an achievement? What if we just try to become the person that's a magnet for what's meant for us in that season?

Speaker 1: 29:05

Oh, I totally agree and I like, as you're talking, I'm like, wow, 20, 20 year old me really needed this conversation. I'm like 10 years ago, 20 year old me really needed this because I remember like being that and like, as women, anybody listening to this I mean like who's, you know old, like at any age really. But you know, the 20 year old listening to this, like this is real and this is coming from experience. Like you and I are having these conversations because, like, we don't understand those feelings or like no, we've been through it. We're on the other side and we're like here. Let me give you the code to like pull you through this quicker. You know, like, just listen.

Speaker 2: 29:43

Like learn from our experience here. I love that you just said that to me, I have to tell you. So I'm big on vision boards and one of the quotes that's near the center of my vision board is be the woman that you once needed, and so that I love. I love that you just said that to me because that is that's really, honestly, my in innocence, that's my mission. So thank you.

Speaker 1: 30:08

And I am fills your welcome and I feel so aligned with that. I mean, that was, where have the audacity came from? Was I needed this? And so I like wanted to create a podcast. And you know, I just was like, who am I speaking to? And I'm like, why am I speaking to me five years ago? I'm speaking to me 10 years ago, right, yeah.

Speaker 2: 30:27

When I, I, I and I love the title of your podcast because I love things that you know have the audacity. It can be taken in so many different contexts, but all of the contexts are strong, you know, like, whether you want to use that word to whatever you know positive, negative. However you want to use that word, it's a strong word and I think that that title is amazing and I do think that all of us need to have more audacity to be who we are, to live how we want to live, to believe in ourselves Like there could there's not a better word for it.

Speaker 1: 31:01

Well, thank you, I'm glad that like that comes through and it really just was like Inelidance, one of the things that I'll share a story with you, and I haven't really shared it with my community. But when I was thinking of a name for my podcast, like have a daisy like it came through and going back to the beginning of this conversation and like people are like niche down and make it really. The title of your podcast needs to be self explanatory For people to want to click on it and to find it. And so you really just need to make obvious. And I was told by somebody who is a very successful in the podcasting space, who's a very successful podcast, was like I don't think that title is gonna work Because it's too broad, it doesn't really Speak to somebody. Like if I am scrolling through and I see it, I'm not really gonna know what that means. And so I had to do like some internal work and like I'm sharing this, not tarp on that person, like they were sharing from their experience what was what they thought was best.

Speaker 1: 31:57

But, um, like listening to yourself and all of these pivots, you know, and people aren't gonna get it. Because I battled with like should I change it? Should I, should I not like this? This person knows what they're talking about. They're already successful, like if somebody I look up to you so, but I knew I was like, no, this is it, this is what it is. And so, even though it makes sense to nobody else, we're gonna do this. And so, like I share this story just to be like the person listening to, to just you know, even if nobody gets it, like, trust your instincts and that comes from everything we've been talking about Building your confidence in yourself and looking within and not to others. To really trust yourself and be like, okay, I don't care if nobody gets this, we're gonna go for it.

Speaker 2: 32:40

Right and how cool that you did that, how amazing that you Took the advice. You listen to their experience and you were like, no, I know, I know myself, I know what I need. It's all my heart and I'm doing it Like that is amazing that you can speak to that and say I stuck, I stuck up for what I knew was right and I did what was on my heart. So many people don't have the bravery to do that and I think that that is so admirable that you did.

Speaker 2: 33:06

And I think it's the perfect name, truly like I love it. I think it's so clever, so smart, so Strong and I love the word strong because I think you can look at it in so many different ways. But I just I think it's a perfect name and I adore it and I think about you know, I was talking about it only takes one for some things. We only need the listeners who resonate with us and who want our message and who want to be a part of our, our community, and who want to be on this journey with us. If there's someone listening, that's like I don't agree with that, I don't like that. I don't like that podcast name. Well, you don't have to click on it. You don't have to listen, but if it intrigues you, if it speaks to you, you're gonna click on it and then you're gonna go. Oh my god, I'm so happy I did.

Speaker 2: 33:49

This is me, these are my people and those are the only people we need in this life. We only need our people. We don't need the validation from the billions of others. They're just not the ones that are meant for us.

Speaker 1: 34:02

I love that and you know also, too, like I want to say I love the name of your podcast, like this is for us. I'm like that is so beautiful, I love that. I love that name for and it's so true and it really just speaks to everything we've talked about in our conversation today is the right people are going to find you and and, and. You know, in the end, if you're trying to be for everybody, you're gonna be for no one, and so Really, stick like, stay true to that and so no, I just I want to thank you so much. This conversation has been so life-giving and Joyful, so I just want to say thank you.

Speaker 1: 34:36

I do have a final question that I ask every guest who comes on some high, some high cast do Like what's your pump up song or what's your go-to song, and they like make playlists for all their guests. I have made a list of Self-care guide and so every guest that comes on, I'm like what's your go-to self-care? And I tell you there's been over 50 people and they're all different. So I love it and it's just this really cool resource in unique way. So I want to ask you what is your go-to self-care? That you're like I have to do this for me.

Speaker 2: 35:09

Okay, I'm gonna try to pick just one.

Speaker 1: 35:11

I would you can do more than one.

Speaker 2: 35:13

Okay, I would say and this is actually something that I wanted to, if I may that I wanted to offer yes your community.

Speaker 2: 35:21

So I am huge on quotes. Quotes, since a very young age, have really been a source of Guidance, of helping me to feel better, of helping me to know what's possible. I don't quotes Just really. They just mean a lot to me and so, as far, if I had to choose one self-care thing, I would say I have a quote book and I've had multiple quote books, but at the start of when I was about a junior in high school, and anytime I was going through something in my life, I Would find quotes that spoke to me, and maybe those quotes spoke to a place of I Don't want to say keeping me down, but a place of like.

Speaker 2: 36:02

If I was heartbroken, I would search and read quotes from someone else who is heartbroken, so describing my feelings, describing how I think a broken heart is one of the worst things we can experience as humans, but so I would write it some dark quotes.

Speaker 2: 36:17

And then maybe the next day, the quotes I was searching for were quotes to lift me out of the heartbreak, and then maybe I would go back to the dark ones and then go back to the Uplifting, but I would sit and whether Pinterest, like no matter where I found them, instagram, whatever.

Speaker 2: 36:33

I would sit and write them down and then put a space and then do the next one, and I would do it for however long felt good to me. And then because sometimes you know, I do believe in journaling I think it's incredible, but I also think sometimes maybe we don't know the exact words we want to say for ourselves. So, finding these quotes almost were like yes, that is exactly how I feel or that's exactly what I need, and so I would just write pages and pages and pages of quotes and it's helped me through some of the darkest times in my life. And so Something that I, when I started the podcast, something that I made, is I actually made a quote journal and it's 10 of my favorite quotes, and so you open this PDF and it's absolutely free and you can get it through. I'll give you the link and maybe we could put it in the show notes.

Speaker 1: 37:20

I'll link it in the show notes.

Speaker 2: 37:21

Yeah, that would be awesome. And so it's just gonna come to your email and it's a free PDF and it's 10 of my favorite quotes. And then there's a journal prompt underneath and so it's about you know, like one of the quotes in there that I love, I love them all, but one is Sometimes we were forced in directions we should have chosen for ourselves. And it's like what is a time in your life that you, you know, maybe it's a breakup, maybe it's a breakup, maybe a lot of us will stand, and we are. We know we're unhappy in the relationship, we know it's not the right one for us. We stay, we stay. We stay because we're afraid of failure, we're afraid of being alone, whatever the story is, and then all of a sudden that person breaks up with us, or the relationship comes to a crashing halt or whatever, and then we find ourselves standing there miserable, heartbroken, scared, but in the back of our mind we're like but I wanted this, deep down, I knew this is what I needed. So sometimes we're forced in the directions we should, the direction we should have chosen for ourselves, and so it's.

Speaker 2: 38:23

It's like what is a time that that's happened in your life that you have literally like a job it's been taken from you, a relationship has been taken from you. You wanted this so badly, it didn't work out and then something better came. It's just a whole compilation of these beautiful quotes that really gets you thinking and that help you To realize your self-worth, your confidence that sometimes the worst things are really the most beautiful things. So that, that, for me, is a self-care, and quotes really do that for me. So that was a really long one, I'm sorry. Another thing is I love to sit sometimes and I'm a beer person, so like I could sit and just like drink beer and watch a mindless TV show. You know one that just makes me not have to think at all. That's another one for me, yeah.

Speaker 1: 39:11

I love. I love like first, I do love like sometimes you just need a good mindless TV show. You're like I just need to not have to think especially. You know Like you have a business and a podcast and the rest of your life outside of that. You're just like I need to just chill first, zone out for a minute. You need to zone out. I need something that doesn't require a lot of brain load. I just need to chill. So I love that. But I want to come back to yes, I will leave.

Speaker 1: 39:37

I'll put the link for the quote book in the show notes below and I love that and like, as you're saying, that one, I love the quote that you shared. I was like that is so true, you do get forced into situations, like forced into lanes. You should have chose and I was like I used to do that all the time and so it was like a little bit of a permission slip for me. Like I didn't write them down but I would have a whole Pinterest board of quotes and like would go search quotes and you know all those things. I was like, oh, that's just like a good permission slip to like keep doing the things that brought you joy when you were younger, like you.

Speaker 2: 40:11

Yes, and I think we forget that. I think we forget it and I don't know what it is, but for me it was magical. I think I did some of the worst heartbreaks because that's something I really speak to a lot on the podcast too is heartbreak and some of the worst heartbreaks I've ever been through. That's what got me to the other side is and Pinterest is amazing. Oh my God, I can, I am obsessed with Pinterest, but sometimes writing it down and feeling it, and then also, when you're out of it, like I can go back right now and get that quote book I had when I was a junior in high school and I can go through and I can see my pen change.

Speaker 2: 40:49

You know, so I can see and I would. I dated them sometimes but really I just could see the pen change because I would use different pens, but just to see the dark, the hopeful, the light, the dark, you know, of what I was going through when I didn't have words for myself and I could borrow someone else's to pull me out of that darkness.

Speaker 1: 41:09

Well, I love that, and I will tell you that nobody has ever said that this is a whole unique thing so like. That's why I love that question, because you never you never know what you're gonna get, and so so I do like I just wanna thank you so much so I'll link everything in the show notes, but I wanna ask how can the listener connect with you?

Speaker 2: 41:30

Yeah, so I, we will put my website and my the link to the PDF down in the show notes and then my Instagram is at noelrobertskoli. So I would love if anything in this episode resonated, please reach out to me, please DM me. My podcast is this Is For Us. So you know we're talking transparency here. I'm trying to get good at this. You know Like I'm trying, I wanna be good at the connection and I want to build this community of us. So, yeah, instagram, noelrobertskoli, and I would love to talk and meet, to meet everybody.

Speaker 1: 42:08

Well, perfect. Well, I will link everything below in the show notes. And no, I just wanna thank you again so much for just sharing your heart and being transparent and vulnerable. This was such a fun conversation.

Speaker 2: 42:18

It really was. I've loved every single second. I'm honored that you spent this time with me today. Thank you for inviting me. I have had the greatest time.

Speaker 1: 42:28

I truly hope that you loved today's conversation and, as noel mentioned at the end, we cannot wait to hear your takeaways. So please, if there was something you liked, take a screenshot of this tag on Instagram, share your takeaways or just DM us and let us know, because this was such a good conversation and you gleaming something from this conversation is exactly why noel and I do what we do and why we show up here, and I strongly encourage you, if you've eyed with this, to click the link in the show notes and check out her podcast. This Is For Us and since it's 2024, I'm wearing this season of Unapologetically asking for what we want One. I want you to reach out to her and tell her thank you like. Share takeaway from that conversation. It's just nice.

Speaker 1: 43:16

As somebody who has guested on other podcasts, it's so encouraging and life giving to hear takeaway from somebody who took something from what you shared on somebody else's podcast. So please do that. And also please take 30 seconds to leave a review for this podcast and a five star rating. It truly helps more than you know, and if you've left a review, share this episode with one person that you know would truly love this episode and get something from it. Now you know, before I go, that I can't let you leave without reminding you that you're worthy, you have value.

Speaker 1: 43:58

You get to take up space in this world simply because you exist. Don't let anyone, including yourself, convince you otherwise, and if that idea or vision for your life is in you, it is for you. I'm always rooting for you and I can't wait to talk to you soon. Thank you so much for listening. If you love this episode, I would love to hear from you, so share it on Instagram and tag me so I can personally thank you for getting this message out. I'm so grateful to have you on this journey with me, so until next time, remember to have the audacity.