Breaking Free From Imposter Syndrome

 In this episode I talk about the common struggles associated with feeling like a fraud and offer practical solutions for managing these intrusive thoughts. There is an emphasizes on the importance of practicing to sharpen your skills,  seeking support, accepting compliments, and daily scripture reading as a way to trust in God's plan. 

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I'm excited to connect with you! Remember, you can do hard things!
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me"- Philippians 4:13

*Affiliated with Painting Miracles, INC & Certified Life Coach through the I-A.M System

Transcript

0:05

Hey friend, welcome to the restored mind podcast, where we are going to be talking about various life topics surrounding mindset transformations. These topics are coming from a faith lens and will propel you into a life of peace and joy. My name is Caroline, wife, mom of three, daughter of the one true king. Host of this podcast and certified light coach through the I am system by Painting Vehicles Incorporations. My hope is that this podcast brings God's light into your life and you break free from the chains that are holding you back. Friend, it is time to shift your mindset into one that will help you flourish. Ready? Let's go. Hello and welcome to the restored mind podcast. How are you doing this week? My friend, I know I probably sound a little bit congested and maybe. There's some raspiness that you're hearing through the microphone. If that is the case, I apologize. This is really the first time in my adult life that dealing with. Allergies I'm not exactly sure what's going on this year, but. It's definitely flaring up. I am. Very much congested. But we are just going to roll with the punches and see what happens. Before we get started. Let me introduce myself to you in case you are new here. My name is Caroline and at the restored mind podcast, we are looking at mindset transformation that comes from a faith lens. So what does that mean? Well, it means we are using scripture to help build a solid foundation for us so that we can move about in our daily life with peace and joy, because I truly believe that is what we are all searching for to have peace in our life, and to have joy that fulfills us. So I hope that as you are listening to this episode today that you would be encouraged and inspired to see. God's light and your life and being encouraged to pursue a relationship with him. And also to not give up because the heart beat verse that we're going to talk about today comes from Philippians four 13 that says I can do all things through him. Who strengthens me. And so that inspires the tagline for the restored mind at to be, you can do hard things. If you are a returning listener, welcome back. I am super excited that you are here. Very honored to have all of you here. And I just want to take a moment to say thank you that you are taking the time out of your day to listen to this episode.. Last week, we encouraged a shift in mindset to show up at work with joy instead of viewing your work as something that is dreadful. When you work with joy, my friend, there is peace, even in the midst of challenging times. And when you are joyfully showing up, you are working and keeping the work that's been given to you. and. So if you want to know what I mean. By working and keeping. Go take a listen to last week's episode, which is titled from complaints to joy. embracing a new work mindset. It's really hard for me to. unciate my words. Because I'm so congested. So I apologize, but we're going to get through it. This week, we are going to talk about something that I believe we all have experience with at some point in our life. And that is imposter syndrome. How many of you have believed or thought that you surely could not achieve something? Because of your lack of experience or it stopped working towards a goal because you felt that. What you are doing already has a market. Saturated with others doing the same thing or something similar. And then of course comes the comparison mindset, which leads to more doubt. It you feeling like a fraud or even a fake. That is something that is very real. That mindset. Those thoughts are very real. It is not something that is easy to navigate. and I know from experience. That there are intrusive thoughts that come with imposter syndrome. So today we're going to talk about it as always I'll share my thoughts and give you ways that you can work towards stepping up of imposter syndrome. These are things that I have felt it's worked for me. And so they're simply to give you ideas, i would, however, recommend reaching out to a licensed therapist. That could help you backtrack where these thoughts are stemming from. If you feel like you need help in that portion of your journey. With that said, though, I would like to remind you that I am not by any means, a licensed therapist. This episode is meant to help you progress in your journey. So I have two personal stories with imposter syndrome. The first one is going to be about when it actually stopped me dead in my tracks. And then the second one is going to be about how it almost stopped to me dead about tracks again so I was really young when this event took place. I would say I was a junior or a senior in high school was in a roundabout that time. I competed in my very first pageant and won my division, which led me to proceed to another competition. And so that got me really nervous. I have to also tell you that I had no professional training. I was actually guided by two very special people in my life. They were my biggest supporters during this particular season of my life. But after having won that competition. I went to another competition and they were not there with me. I actually went with my mom and so we showed up to this bigger competition and this is where imposter syndrome started settling in. Because throughout the weekend, as competitions were happening, I had felt like I was a fraud because I didn't have any professional training. I didn't have a new dress. As a matter of fact. Everything that I wore. I took to this competition too. And so I didn't have anything fancy. I was afraid And also didn't know how to voice the things that were going on in my head at the time. But showing up to this bigger competition. imposter syndrome, started settling in through the weekend. And when I was on stage, I completely tanked, this was the first night that we would be on stage for the first round of questions. And because I froze on stage. I. Felt like I lost the grace or the poise to speak in a microphone. And honestly it costs me the competition because I did not make it to the next round. And I was so embarrassed and. I definitely felt defeated in that moment. And so, because of the embarrassment that I had, I just thought that I didn't have in me anymore to get up and try again. And so for a long time, I walked around. With that on my mind thinking that. I wasn't cut out for this because I didn't have the right training or the right tools to be in that particular space. And so for a long time, that took me out. I didn't compete anymore. And honestly, I have a competed sense, but the reasons for not competing have since changed where I don't feel like I need to do that anymore, but in my younger years, I had thoughts of competing again, but never went back to it because of my mind, do an automatically go back to that one night on stage where I completely froze. But thankfully we are not in that space anymore. And I was able to let it go with peace. The second time that imposter syndrome almost stopped me, was the lodge of the restorative mind podcast, because it may be asked who am I to even speak on mindset changes? when I am still working through my very own struggles. I didn't have all the answers that I was actually doubtful that my experience was enough to have a space or a voice in the podcasting world. I had everything set up for the trailer to launch and. The night before I almost took it down, I was starting to freak out. which I am incredibly thankful for my husband who encouraged me to go with it because this has been honestly, life changing for me. I get to have conversations with you. I get to help guide you. And it has opened my eyes, that there is a need to bridge the gap of scripture and mindset transformations. A lot of us live in this world. and believe these sayings like love yourself, but as believers, we might not be taking the time to be in the word to understand what love is. And I'm saying that from my own personal experience. And so once that. Veil. So to speak has been lifted. It has honestly changed the way I view the say, love yourself. So I'm incredibly honored to guide you as you grow. I am also a life coach with painting miracles. So if you need help in your goals and wherever it would be, be reach out to me, my friends, there are. Links in the show notes below on how you can contact me. And we could go from there. So maybe you're in the space of doubting your skills or your capabilities or your experience. And you're having thoughts that you couldn't possibly be able to be in the same space as whatever you are aspiring to go after. Right. Maybe imposter syndrome set it because you failed that something. And now you assume that it isn't for you. And I just spoke about that with my pageant journey. My friend, if any of this sounds familiar to you and you're struggling with imposter syndrome, I want to remind you of a few things. one is that Your skills are going to improve over time with practice and two it's. That failure is not the end result. Now your skills are going to improve over time with practice. That doesn't be that the skills you have now. Are not enough. Everyone starts somewhere. I would encourage you not to let the comparison mindset win by allowing it to dictate whether or not you are good enough, you know that you have the skillsets start from there. Now, will, there'll be someone out there whose skills might be better than you, honestly. Yes. This is not about you versus them or them versus you. It's about how much. You are willing to improve and how much work you are willing to put in to sharpen those skills. Keep working and don't give up. It don't worry about what everyone else is doing. There is a big difference in seeking help so that you can improve in looking at someone's skills as a way to put value on your skill set. And what I mean by that is. you are looking at someone's skills as a way to gauge, if you have enough skills to get in the same field as them my friend stopped to have right now. Stop it, you have the skill set. You can do it. You can do it. The question is, are you willing to put in the work that is required for you to improve your skills? Earlier I talked about how failure is not the end result, but that is if you are choosing to not let it end there. You have the power to decide if you come back from failure or leave it at that and move on to something else. If you decide you want to get back up and try again. My friend, the question to ask yourself is how badly do you want this? If you decide that you are. Going to move on from this. Then the question for you is what did I learn from this experience and how do I take that lesson and apply into the next thing that I'm going into? And neither one is bad. Some people realize in their defeat that it wasn't for them because they discovered a little bit more about themselves. Which is awesome. And honestly being aware of that, isn't a failure to me. Why. Because you got back up, even though you didn't go back and compete again, or even though you didn't go back to that thing that you failed from, You still got back up? My friend life is hard. Failure will happen, but you got to get back up. You might be asking, where do i Get the strength to do that. How can I get back up after I've been defeated by my own thoughts and inability to quote, win at something. Well, first you went when you seek the Lord first. Okay. I'm just going to put that out there. You, when would you seek the Lord first and put him first above all things, winning the race of your faith? My friend is more important than winning in worldly things. So yes, it might feel defeating when you're battling imposter syndrome and your. Having these intrusive thoughts, but building a relationship with God is going to take you a lot further than a title or completing a goal. We still have work to do regardless. But you have to ask. Who are you going to work for? The world. My mind goes to the heart versus the restored. mind as I was thinking about imposter syndrome. Which is Philippians four 13. It is the heartbeat of the restored mind did it says I can do all things through him. Who strengthens me and I'm going to break it down. This verse says I could do all things. That means that you are not limited by any worldly things, but by the will of God, So, yes, you can do all things. And maybe for right now at the season that you are in, you are limited by finances or your mindset or the resources available to you, but in the same verse, it also says through God who strengthens me. And for me. That says that God is the one that is going to carry you through how, by his strength, to which he gives you my friend, he is mighty. He is good. And just, I would encourage you to trust. Him. in this season. I know, it sounds simple. Does it. How amazing would it be if we could trust. Without restraint. It is a lot harder to live out that it is to talk about. I totally get it, but you know what I'm going to say. Right. You can do hard things. Yes, absolutely. I also love this verse because it it reminds me of the obedience needed when. We are building a relationship with God so that we can learn to trust him. Paul says it a couple verses before this. Not that I am speaking of being at need for, I have learned in whatever situation. I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. It any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger and abundance and need. imposture syndrome. my friend can take you down the path of confusion in so many ways. The thoughts of you thinking that you are fraud or that you're fake, or that you're not even worthy of being at this particular space? Or how could your experience compare to someone else's experience and your skills? Does it seem like it's enough? Imposter syndrome can definitely take you down a path of confusion. I was rereading the pursuit of God by AWS Tozer, which I highly recommend. and in this book, he talks about complacency. He says complacency is a deadly foe of all spiritual growth. But Paul in Philippians chapter four, wrote about being content in whatever situation. In my mind, those two words have negative connotations with them. but in my quick research of these two words, I have found to that complacent means, making the choice not to improve because you are overconfidence. And synonyms thems. I found. are to self satisfy and pride. Whereas content is being satisfied, having joy and peace. Now you can have both, but both of them do not serve God. Well, because one of the stops us from trusting. And to grow a relationship with him to be content only content is to be satisfied, having joy and peace. And when you are trusting God, That means you are trusting him with everything that is happening in your life. Now does being content mean that it's going to be easy? No. Does this mean that you'll get your way? Absolutely not. We're not always going to get in our way. But it does put you in a place where you are not worried. And what does Jesus say about not being worried? He says, therefore do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day. Has enough trouble of its own. And you could find this in Matthew chapter six, verse 34. I was reading from the English standard version for all of the scriptures that are brought up today. And so when you are not worried about tomorrow, And you're only focusing on this day, this very moment It's already so hard, especially if you are trying to overcome imposter syndrome So what are some things that you can do to overcome these intrusive thoughts? well I would say one, talk to someone that you trust most of the time, you'll find that you're getting in your own way, and it can be hard for you to see that. When you are not expressing these thoughts to someone else. How did not been for me telling my husband that I have thoughts of pulling the plug on the restored mind before it even launched. I probably would have went ahead and did it. But I was so encouraged by my husband's words when he said. No one has your experience. And he's absolutely right. My friend. No one has your experience. So while we might experience things, similarly, you have a unique story to tell that you're going to be able to relate to someone and to help them in a way that you might not have even known yourself. Another way that you can overcome imposter syndrome is to not be so quick to write off someone's compliments. Of your skills and talents. And I thought about this because I'm so guilty of this, I'm guilty of everything. I'll talk about all the restored mind, by the way. But my friend, one of my really, really good friend used to compliment me on my skills as someone who can cook or someone who is creative and I used to tell her that I'm just a, nobody, I'm a, nobody, I don't have skills. And. She would tell me to not say those things about myself. And so I'm going to share the same thing with you. Stop writing off someone's, compliments of your skills and talents. It might not be where you want it to be today. But it is going to improve over time. If you take the time to sharpen those skills. And my friend, the last one I have for you is to be in the word daily., Read the Bible, my friend. I don't just show up on Sundays and take the worship and the sermon, home with you, and then forget about it all the other days of the week in order to grow your faith and find your comfort and grow relationship with. God, and to trust him, you need to be in the word daily. And when his words take root. in your heart, it's going to also uproot the things that are not going to bring light into your life. And I know it's hard. It's complicated because you're going through something of your own. But my friend. You can do hard things. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to listen in on this episode. I meant what I said. You can do hard things, so don't let the daily challenges stop you from reaching your greatest potential. If you are ready to take the next step in your journey and are finding that you are in need of help and would like someone to keep you accountable, I would love to offer you my life coaching services. Click on the link in the show notes to get started there. You will also find links to my social media pages where you're able to connect with me as well. My friends, I look forward to speaking with you again next week here on the restored mind podcast. Go in peace.