Do you ever feel like you're speaking, but no one is truly listening? In our bustling world, the art of listening has become a rare treasure. But what if you could be heard, genuinely and completely?
In this episode, we’ll explore the significance of being heard and how it can transform the way we navigate life's clutter—both internal and external. I'll share my experiences as a client in coach training, the lessons learned about the pressures we place on ourselves, and how the simple act of listening can pave the way for personal growth and self-discovery.
Join me as I extend an open invitation to you—to be part of the "100 Hours of Listening" initiative. Whether you're a friend, past client, silent listener, or a fellow professional, your voice matters. This isn't a sales pitch or a consultation; it's an opportunity for you to be heard, without cost or obligation, in a non-judgmental space.
Book a session here, come as you are.
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Intro: Welcome to A Pleasant Solution, Embracing An Organized Life. I'm your host, certified life coach, professional organizer, and home life expert, Amelia Pleasant Kennedy and I help folks permanently eliminate clutter in their homes and lives. On this podcast will go beyond the basics of home organization to talk about why a clutter-free mindset is essential to an aligned and sustainable lifestyle. If you're someone with a to-do list, if you're managing a household and if you're caring for others, this podcast is for you. Let's dive in.
Welcome to Episode 65, “100 Hours of Listening.” Hey y’all! I’ve just recently returned from Long Beach, California where the annual Summit of the National Association of Productivity and Organizing professionals was held. It’s a four-day conference where those interested in the profession come together to learn from one another, network, and think more broadly about the profession as a whole. NAPO is a volunteer-run organization that’s historically been centered around education. Each Summit, one to two dozen folks deliver presentations on topics relevant to the industry. Sessions qualify as continuing education credits towards the various certificates and certifications offered in our field.
Since I’ve shifted out of in-home organizing and into virtual coaching these last few years, I’ve found my biggest takeaways during events like these occur on the couch in the lobby. It’s not that the sessions aren’t excellent – they are – it’s that my work is best served through intimate, meaningful conversations. As an ambivert, or someone who falls squarely in between being an introvert and an extrovert, I navigate large gatherings by creating my own smaller gatherings. Instead of trying to swallow the entire conference whole, I focus on connecting more deeply with a handful or more of folks who are willing to share their time with me. Basically, I have lots of conversations where I practice listening.
You see, people love to be listened to. I love to be listened to. (It’s one reason I produce this podcast each week.) Think about it. How does it feel for you when you are heard? How does it feel for you when you are dismissed or not heard? It’s a powerful difference, in my opinion. So, in today’s episode, I’m going to share with you an initiative I’m undertaking called “100 Hours of Listening.” I’ll share my thoughts on being heard and how you can directly participate in the “100 Hours” project. Be sure to listen until the end. It’s one way I’ll be living A Pleasant Solution’s core value of generosity to self and others.
When I was in coach training, I had access to weekly coaching sessions by my peers in training and by certified and master certified coaches. I was able to sign up for a slot that suited my schedule each week. And, I’ll be honest with you, at first, I was nervous sitting in the role of the client. It was odd, playing the dual role of coach trainee on one hand, then client on the other. I found myself both watching the coach and second guessing how I was responding to the various prompts or conversations. I found myself being nervous as the session time approached thinking that there was a “right” way to be a client. That I had to come prepared with something to talk about. That I needed a goal, a plan, or a purpose. I assumed that each week I needed to bring something to work on or work towards. I wondered what she or he was thinking while we were talking – wondering if they were judging my brain or my situation as messy.
You see, I was putting a lot of stress on myself. Eventually, I shared this stress with my coach in one of my sessions, and she simply said, “Hmmm. I wonder why that’s the case for you. What do you think is going on?” It was a simple, open-ended question, based in curiosity, that allowed me to explore my brand of perfectionism deeper. It allowed me to shift fully into the role of the client. She was listening. I was being heard.
Many people have no idea what mindset coaching is, and that’s because the measurable metrics are a little less concrete than in something like fitness. The process is unique to each client’s internal obstacles. Business coaches, on the other hand, give you an actionable plan to raise revenue or gain clients. Executive coaches take you to the next level of your career. Money coaches educate you around your financial resources and goals. Therapists help you heal past wounds and give current pain a place to be heard.
Mindset coaches help you build a bridge from where you are now to where you want to go. That’s the simplest explanation. As a clutter coach, I help you figure out why you’re not doing what you want to be doing or living the life you want to be living. For many of us, internal clutter is in the way. It’s this internal clutter that leads to the external clutter you see and feel around you – in your home, in your relationships, in your schedule, in your lifestyle. Mindset coaching encourages you to slow down, become more aware, then make the next best intentional choice that will serve and support you. Through listening and coaching you’re better able to see the limitations in your way then decide from a place of self-compassion what the solution is. It’s a little less tangible around processes and systems than business and executive coaching and a little more fluid, like therapy.
And that’s why mindset work leads to transformational inner growth. It’s because it’s rooted in the skills of listening and reflecting rather than planning and doing. The planning and doing comes later once the inner obstacles have been loosened or navigated around. As I overheard a colleague share recently, “I know what to do. I just can’t figure out why I’m not doing it.” Now, if you lean towards being type A, being super logical, or have a bit of a perfectionist tendency that may sound familiar. You may want to be shown the exact steps, when what would be more effective is exploring why you think being shown the exact steps would be more successful than trusting the wisdom you already possess. Yes. There’s absolutely a place for learning and building new practical skills, and mindset coaching is the place where you unlearn and release old habit patterns and decide from a place of intention why you’re capable of doing what you’ve been avoiding.
When I was being coached those first few months, I was so focused on being a good client that I missed the true lesson. The client has no responsibilities in the session other than to show up. You can show up ragged, in pajamas, late in the afternoon, and have nothing that you think you want to talk about. That’s perfectly okay. Coaching is a safe container for you to be as close to your natural self as you choose to be. You don’t need to wear a superwoman cape or a mask like you may do throughout your day. You don’t need to be “on” or “put together.” You’re welcome to do the exact opposite – be “off” and totally fall apart. You’re welcome to share any emotion that arises. You’re welcome to say I have no idea what’s going on or what to do next. You’re welcome to let it pour out and not worry about whether it makes sense or not.
Because coaching is about being heard. So, at the top of the episode I asked you what it feels like for you when you are truly heard. I believe that each of us has an innate desire to be heard. In my mind, it translates to being seen, for all that you are. As a coach, first and foremost, I believe that you are whole and worthy, no matter what. Period. You don’t need to explain anything to me, unless that feels good to you. I’m sure that in your personal life there are certain folks you share things with and certain folks you don’t. Our friends, our colleagues, our family members, they don’t always listen fully. They often interrupt, give advice, or believe our story in a way that enables us to continue on our current path rather than think objectively about what’s best for us. Your personal network is essential to your well-being, yet when it comes to the benefits of being heard in a non-judgmental way, I truthfully believe there’s nothing better than coaching.
Which brings me to the 100 Hours of Listening Project. I’d like to invite you to share what’s on your heart and be heard. All you have to do is show up, and I’ll take it from there. I want to hear what you have to say. If you want coaching, I’ll offer it. I don’t want to add any other guidelines or restrictions to it. If you’re in my audience or world, I want to hear from you. You could be my friend. You could be a past client. You could be a prospective client. You could be someone who’s been listening and been silent for years. You could be a professional organizer or a fellow Fair Play Facilitator. You and I could have no relationship whatsoever other than via this podcast. If you have a friend that would benefit from being heard, share this episode. There’s no judgment and no pressure.
Now, I want you to pause for a moment and get curious if there’s a little voice in your head that assumes I’m talking to someone else. That you don’t count or qualify. Just notice that automatic response. Hear it, acknowledge it, and ask yourself why you think the offer applies to other folks than you. Question whether your hesitation or reaction is related to being the one who shares. Perhaps your hesitation or reaction is related to me. Or perhaps you’re thinking too hard about the one thing you’d want to share. Notice what’s happening for you. Whatever it is, know that I know what it takes to be a client.
In the past, if you’ve been a part of my email community, you know that I occasionally offer free coaching. The 100 Hours of Listening will be an extension of that. You’ll simply head to the show notes, book a session that works for your schedule, and show up. If I listen once and you want me to listen again, you’ll book another session. 100 hours will be available, and the offer will be available until the 100 hours are booked. Because you’re more organized than you think, you’ll show up. There’s no cost. This is completely free. It’s not a sales call or a consultation. It’s just a listening session. It’s as simple and straightforward as that. I truly hope you’ll join me. Talk to y’all soon.
Outro: If you’ve enjoyed today’s podcast and want to stay up to date on what’s happening each month in A Pleasant Solution, I invite you to join my email community. I share relatable stories, post upcoming events, and offer a weekly mini solution. Click on the resource in the show notes or visit apleasantsolution.com to learn more.