67 | Return to Your Table with Caterina De Falco

In this latest podcast episode, I sit down with Caterina De Falco, an expert on the relationship between food, health, and most importantly, family.. Caterina's insights on creating meaningful mealtimes and making meal preparation convenient are not just about food; they're about crafting a life that's rich in connection and simplicity.

Learn how to simplify your meal prep, engage your family, and create a routine that turns dinner into the most anticipated part of your day. Caterina's unique blend of childhood memories, scientific research, and practical tips will leave you inspired and ready to 'Return to the Table' making mealtime a cherished, stress-free experience.

If you're ready to reclaim the dinner table and foster an environment of connection and relaxation, this episode is a must-listen. 

Topics Discussed:

• How to make your kitchen more functional
• How to simplify your weekly mealtime routine 
• The importance of sitting together at the table 
• Where to buy quality food beyond the grocery store, saving time and money 

And join me as I extend an open invitation to you—to be part of the "100 Hours of Listening" initiative. Whether you're a friend, past client, silent listener, or a fellow professional, your voice matters. This isn't a sales pitch or a consultation; it's an opportunity for you to be heard, without cost or obligation, in a non-judgmental space.

Book a session here, come as you are.

GUEST INFO:

Caterina De Falco, Writer and Researcher | Website | Instagram 

MENTIONED:

Blue Zones | Dan Buettner

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Transcript

Intro: Welcome to A Pleasant Solution, Embracing An Organized Life. I'm your host, certified life coach, professional organizer, and home life expert, Amelia Pleasant Kennedy and I help folks permanently eliminate clutter in their homes and lives. On this podcast will go beyond the basics of home organization to talk about why a clutter-free mindset is essential to an aligned and sustainable lifestyle. If you're someone with a to-do list, if you're managing a household and if you're caring for others, this podcast is for you. Let's dive in.

Amelia: Welcome to Episode 67, "Return to Your Table with Caterina De Falco.” Caterina De Falco researches and writes about the intricate relationship between what and how you eat and how it affects your health and relationships. Through her work, she teaches others how to create more meaningful mealtimes and make meal preparation more convenient. You can learn more about Caterina at dinnerwithcaterina.com and connect with her on Instagram @catarina.defalco. 

So welcome to the podcast, Caterina.

Caterina: Thank you for inviting me here. I'm thrilled to be speaking with you today.

Amelia: Yay! So you and I, we met kind of at the beginning of the pandemic when you were looking for a way to make your home kitchen more functional. We moved just a few things around and voila, here we are! And I've been following you ever since, so tell us a little bit about yourself.

Caterina: Well, thank you for the tweaks to the kitchen. It has served me very well. I needed drawer organizers and to get my head around the baskets that I use. We're gonna talk about baskets. That's a good organizational tip I'm gonna share and sprinkle in here later. The baskets in my mudroom are an extension of the kitchen because I'm here to help people run their kitchen like a boss, but we all need a little help and I very much value yours. So my journey to start Return to the Table happened at least a lifetime ago. It feels at age 56, I've been marinating in this project for 34 years that I can count. The very short version of it is a blend of my childhood growing up in an Italian home, getting sidetracked around how to eat and what to eat, and then finding my own way back to the table when I moved to France in my early 20s.

As a result of that, I created a routine and that is the routine that I teach to make getting to the table easy and part of it is the food that is such an obstacle. You have to cook the food and I have an excellent system and it's very easy. It doesn't take much, just a simple routine and a little bit of time and I'll share some of those tidbits today as well. So after I went through my own journey and found my way back to the table. I realized, they say when you become aware of something, you see it everywhere, reticular activation. And that certainly was the case for me. I started seeing the American or US food culture in a new light and understood what people are really struggling with from figuring out what to eat to… really loving their food and feeling good about it and feeding a family. Probably the biggest obstacle. 

So by accident I started helping friends. They'd say, how did you do that? And my kid ate at your house, how'd you get me to eat a salad? I did that for 18 years and then decided to write a book which is coming out at the end of August, middle of August 2024. In about four weeks, I'll have a publication date and everything is in this book from motivation to get the food on the table to how, well, of course, how it's important, but what to do when we get off track. And I'll share some of those tips today. So that's my story in a nutshell.

Amelia: Amazing. Well, I assume the book title is “Return to the Table?”

Caterina: You could assume that. There is a twist to the title and I'm keeping it top secret for the time being and when you see it you'll understand why but there is “Return to the Table" on the front but the main title is a little different.

Amelia: Well, we'll stay tuned and keep track via your Instagram. So I'd love to start all of these conversations by taking a look back at your childhood. So I'd love to kind of hear a little bit about what organization looked like for you in your childhood home, perhaps in the kitchen, or any other area you'd like to share with us.

Caterina: Please. First of all, that is a fabulous question. And I ask questions like this in my book to take people back in time because our routines are either based on something that we have to relearn or that worked well for us. But I've never thought about it in this sense. So what came to me, of course, was the routine of coming to the table, which sounds not so exciting, but there's a twist to here - to this. 

It was the norm that I grew up in an Italian home. I didn't know anything else. You sat at the table every night, the food, my dad was the cook, by the way. He worked and came home and cooked. The food was fresh, homemade, every day. We ate in courses. We sat down. It was just the way it is, or the way it was. I don't remember, my home was organized from a functional standpoint, but you made me think, like, how did it get that way? Who did it? What was happening? 

And I think what I'd like your listeners to walk away with today from our conversation is to create a routine around coming to the table. And I want to share why it's important and how easy it can be, because it does feel absolutely momentous for some families and to give them tips to do that. So, yeah.

Amelia: Yeah, I would love to start there because I think that one of the things you do so well is really emphasize the importance of taking time to sit down and eat. And I really see it as the overarching topic to our conversation. So let's go there. But first, I just want to say that I love that this kitchen culture, the cooking, the sitting down for your family was so just normalized. It was the routine, it was the way it is. And I think that sometimes we take those seemingly small moments or small things either for granted or just when we talk about, I always say folks are more organized than they think, right? 

This is an element of your childhood that was just naturally organized in a routine. And I'm sure for your parents, there was some work that went into it, especially your dad, if he was the cook, but I just think that it's wonderful to reflect and say that organization can happen in the everyday.

Caterina: It can, and I am going to share how to do it simply. My husband grew up in the South of France and he came with the same routine. I struggled with maintaining that routine and that is part of this book. It is the entire middle section of the book. How do we make this happen with soccer and sports?

And I'd like to tie that in before I get into the juicy tidbits of how to make it happen. You mentioned in a podcast, I can't remember which episode, about… decluttering your mind is a theme, but gosh, how did you put it? Hold on, let me check my notes. I thought I wrote it down. Um, it's energetic and logical. Don't know why the words weren't coming to me. And that is, we're so aligned. I mean, like I actually wrote that in my book when I, at the beginning of the routine section, said, I'm going to share some ideas and it's very emotional. 

There's an emotional connection. There's something invisible that's happening called the secret power of food. And there's research that goes behind it. So take a step back for a moment and imagine how you feel when you sit down and relax. You go to a nice dinner. There's that feeling of, ah, like I'm on a break, I'm on vacation, I'm out for the night. This, I assure every listener, can happen every single day, even if you have a five-year-old who doesn't like to eat. 

It is like a mini vacation and it is the easiest, one of the easiest things we can do every day and it has such powerful, powerful benefits. So we're going to motivate first and we'll talk about how it can happen. It's, and I still remember these days, my children are now soon to be 22, 21 and 18, so I've been through, through it all and I remember the days when just praying that you know you got something together you made it to the table you're in that like hyper sympathetic state of rush and the moment I would sit down and still like this but the moment I sit down and just take a breath just one breath just a breath and you look at the food and you immediately start to activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which ironically is known as the rest and digest state. 

This is the ideal state to be eating in. And it is just that one moment that shifts everything and spending only 10 -  I'm always aiming for 20 minutes - for other scientific and emotional reasons, but just 10 minutes to sit and eat slowly, chew well, breathe, take a few pauses in between bites, and a little conversation is absolutely transformational. I had a woman, one of the first families that I coached and helped, she was a single mom, and her son was about 12 or 13 at the time. And she said, “Oh my gosh. I want to change so much. I've been wanting to work on this for years. I just don't know where to start.” 

I mean, really, I felt her pain. I felt like she was near tears. Just how to change her eating habits and routine for her son. And I said, just the stories in my book. It's a good story. I said, just clear off the table, sit at the table, turn off the TV because the routines were not at the table. Just sit at the table. Don't even worry about what you're going to eat. Get anything and just sit there for 10 minutes. That's it.

She called me three days later and she was near tears, just full of joy. And it almost sounds silly that one, making the space, that little bit of space can have such a transformative, you know, such a powerful reaction. But what's happening on a scientific level is the connection.

Amelia: Mmmm…

Caterina: And it's feeding our soul. It's feeding, it's decluttering our mind, to use your words. And it is, like chaos happens right after dinner. You go back into it, you have to get the kitchen cleaned. I have tips for that in my book. You have to get the kids bathed, et cetera. But it's taking the time out that soothes our nervous system, that connects us with our loved ones, that creates lasting memories. And it is working on every cell in our body. This experience of eating and sitting and relaxing.

Amelia: And that makes so much sense, right? As you're talking, what I picture, right? Because everyone who's listening or now watching on YouTube, we know why we're not doing it, why we're not taking the time. We can see the chaos and the energy kind of before that moment and after that moment.

Caterina: It's wonderful.

Amelia: But I think what you're pointing out is just to create almost even a meditative state that occurs as you sit down, you pause, you take a deep breath, thankful for this moment, no matter what you're eating. And hopefully we're eating some fresh ingredients that you're going to encourage and inspire for us here in a moment - that is that 10 or 20 minutes of just sitting and that word connection that really matters in terms of our health, our energy, and our family bonding.

Caterina: Exactly. And for anyone who isn't convinced, they'll enjoy chapter nine, which is the cost if you don't do it on a physical level. I love sharing this tip. So I'm going to just throw this out about the sympathetic and the parasympathetic nervous state. The parasympathetic, as I mentioned, is the rest and digest. It's the ideal state to be in our body function. It's understanding that we're eating. It's time to digest. The digestive system is working, doing its job. In the short version here, the sympathetic is known as the ‘fight or flight.’ And we go into a sympathetic state when we're hurried, rushed, stressed, feeling guilty. It can happen over a piece of chocolate cake. And we are in the fight or flight state, which shuts down the digestive system or at least slows it down depending on how stressed you are. 

Because our body perceives a threat and it's pulling all of its resources to fight that perceived threat. It doesn't know that you're just feeling guilty about cake or you're worried about getting soccer practice on time while you're eating a healthy pan of lasagna. So when we are in the sympathetic and if our digestive system shuts down it can just take all those calories and store them as fat, defeating and sabotaging even the healthiest, freshest salad. So it's logical to sit and breathe and relax.

It's emotional. It's energetic, however you want to describe that. It's invisible. It's powerful. And we have a crisis in the United States right now. We have a crisis of disconnection. The cell phone usage. The research that I put in the book is convincing. It's compelling. And we also have a crisis of health, obesity, diabetes and heart disease. Stress is known as the silent killer. It is that [stress] and nutrition are the top two problems that we are dealing with in the United States. The research, as I said, is all in my book. 

But what solves that? Sitting down to eat delicious, wholesome food which in my book is French and Italian gourmet, there's no lack of flavor. And I throw a lot of butter in there. So anything you like to eat, you can play along with this. But when you have this little mini vacation and you have a delicious meal, my husband says it can solve all our problems. Can't solve all our problems, but it absolutely affects every aspect of our lives. And it's one of the easiest things we can do when we have the right routine and tips and an organizational strategy that is not demanding on our time or energy and that's what I share.

Amelia: Yeah, I can see that to be true because, right, it is that moment of calm amongst all that's happening in our lives. So let's talk a little bit about the food and some of the things that you offer in terms of recipes and cooking, and folks can find all of that on your website.

One of the elements that you like to speak to is the “Blue Zones” phenomenon. Tell us a little bit about what that is and what it means in terms of accessible ingredients that we can add to our diet.

Caterina: Okay, so for anybody who is not familiar with the Blue Zones, you can find a documentary on Netflix and it is fabulous to watch. This is also in chapter nine. And there's also some other fascinating research along the lines of centenarians, which is what this is all based on. There’s been a phenomenon in certain areas of the world, there's an unusually large number of centenarians. And I speak about another area in Italy, I'm gonna keep that as a surprise, which is even, there's a twist on it, on their habits and lifestyles. 

I'll give you a foreshadowing here, I'll give you a tip. They don't exercise, many of them smoke. They really indulged in wine and yet they had this incredible health and 30 percent, well I can't remember the exact but a lot of them were about 20 percent were a hundred like I'm trying to remember how many were 110. Thirty percent, 20 percent I should know because I wrote the book but anyway a remarkable percentage of centenarians and they relaxed, they ate, they had the Mediterranean diet. So, how I tie in the lifestyle, because I have created a system, it's in the book, to bring this into your home, to create your lifestyle around, well, to create the routine around your own lifestyle. And when you do this, after you are familiar with the Blue Zones, Dan Buettner, is the one who coined the Blue Zones and he has what he calls the power nine. It's nine points, common points that are the same among all the Blue Zones. And I tie in what I teach to each of those nine points so you can create your own Blue Zones. And that is how the book wraps up.

 So the recipes are important because it's like the chicken and the egg which came first. If you sit down and savor and eat slowly and really connect with your food and really taste it, food that's processed just doesn't fly. It's easy to eat it quickly, but when you're savoring it, hmm, then you want to move on to something else. And if you have excellent, really fresh, wholesome, delicious food, it's not only a shame not to sit and savor it but you want to sit and savor it. 

So I always tell people, if you need to work on both components, if you deal with the food first, you're gonna find your way into a routine at the table. And if you start with a new routine at the table, you're gonna find your way into exploring different foods. And you've probably heard this thing, teach a man to fish for a day, or teach a man to give a man a fish and eat for a day, teach him how to fish and you feed him forever.

That is what I'm doing in this book. If I give you a recipe, you'll eat for a day. If I teach you how to create your own, you will eat forever and effortlessly. So it's about figuring out what kind of food you like. When feeding a family, I did this. When I had one picky eater, I don't know where he came from. It's genetically impossible in my family. They pop up, I understand the pain. One tiny little green thing, a piece of basil hidden somewhere…

Amelia: They do.

Caterina: I'm not touching that. Oh my gosh. But he loved pesto. So I have a lot of tricks for picky eaters. To stay on track here though, I took out a piece of paper. I'm a numbers girl. So everything is extremely logical, structured. Is this gonna work? Is there time for this? How can we attack this problem and just figure it out? I took a piece of paper and I wrote all the ingredients, the five people in my family liked without argument. 

Then I figured out what I could do with each of those things. I mean, a carrot, a chicken, parsley, whatever the ingredient, a cucumber. And then I made courses, because I teach eating courses for health benefits and because it feels good. And I would say, okay, I could do this with a carrot for the first course main dish, side dish. I can do this with granola for dessert. I can do this with this. 

And it's just a little piece of paper. It's your family menu. Once you get that down and you have this cooking with kitchen intuition, which I also teach in the book. How can you have like, it's like a capsule wardrobe. You have certain pieces that all mix and match. Like you remember Garanimals, the kids' Garanimals clothes when our kids were little, like everything goes together. And once you have this sort of toolkit in your kitchen, you're like, the pesto goes with your chicken. Your cucumber is always gonna go with the olive oil and the Celtic salt for your first course. You always are gonna be able to do this for dessert or for a third course. And it's the main ingredients, like the vegetable, the meat, and the accompaniments. That's not processed. So it's fresh herbs, dried herbs, garlic, olive oil, butter, and cream. Just a handful of ingredients makes hundreds of gourmet dishes and you start with ingredients everybody likes, learn a couple techniques on cooking, like roasting and making a couple sauces, and you mix and match everything together and learn how to use the leftovers, which aren't really leftovers. And it's, you can pull together these incredible meals very, very quickly, get the food on the table and sit down to eat. So if somebody wants to use my recipes or enjoys the kind of food I like, it's there. But if somebody has a different diet preference than I do, you can still follow the system and create your own family menu and learn how to fish for your family.

Amelia: And that's exactly what I heard, right? So it takes time, a bit of time upfront to just self-reflect and say, hey, what are the top few things that everyone in the household will eat, right? Simple question, we can identify some of those things. And then really creating this mix or match system where because for many families, the meal planning, the generating of new ideas, it just weighs on our mental load. And we're like, ah, it's time to eat. I'm hungry. Kids are fussy. But having that pre-work done - here is the list of ingredients that we know at any short moment, we can pull together in a quick fashion. And then I love the second part of learning the skills to cook in a few very straightforward, simple ways. And then that third element of basic accessories or accompaniments to add in terms of sauces or flavor, right? It is a very straightforward and simple way of cooking and organizing the meal time.

Caterina: Yes, more time at the table, less time slaving in the kitchen, unless you want to, because then you can make a couple of investment pieces and, you know, do one-off dishes because you want to make something fabulous. But this is helping people get the everyday meals, gourmet style, fabulous, fresh on the table. Um, I'd like to share an example and I also have shopping tips. So shopping and storage, but where to buy food beyond the grocery store that saves time and money and assures quality. So that's a fun chapter, chapter five. Um, as an example, you know, when I see, um, you mentioned meal planning, so we're going to have this dish, this dish, this dish each day, which is extremely valuable. 

I advocate for a little different twist to that, which is, for example, it's Sunday afternoon, your watching a football game or doing desk work, whatever, gardening. Throw the meat in the oven to roast. It takes 10 minutes to prep. When you get fast used to doing it, it can take even less. And you put that in the oven to roast. The oven does all the work. That could be a pork roast because that's, and it's also inexpensive meat. It could be a beef roast. It's fabulous coated with olive oil. It's caramelized and crispy and juicy inside.

If you're a vegetarian, you can roast vegetables. I have plenty of ideas. But in this example, if you roast that meat, it was almost effortless. Now you have this meat you can serve as is that night with whatever else you're having. You can slice it up and use it for tacos. So taco Tuesday, the meat will still be fresh and you can also freeze it. So you have the meat prepared. You can pull it out to thaw the following week and there is nothing to cook. Instead of getting ground beef and putting the seasoning in The meat's ready to go. Put it on the taco, add your toppings, freshly grated cheddar cheese, pop it in the oven, you're good. You can make a bolognese sauce. Chop it up. That's a little bit more of an investment time, 30 minutes, 25 minutes, but again, you freeze that, that's ready to go. You can use it for pasta. This is my family's, probably one of their favorites. They call it mom's, like leftover kitchen clean out or whatever, they always have different names, but you chop up the meat and saute it in a little bit of olive oil. It's a little dry, you add cream. You have this, with the pan juices, this gorgeous, juicy, flavorful, rich sauce with collagen in it. And you can add fresh herbs, you can add dried herbs, you can add parsley, garlic, a little onion. You can add just the meat and juice and a splash of cream. It's amazing. And dinner's done, and at the same time, it takes to open a jar of pasta sauce. You can put it in a clafoutis, which is like a crustless quiche. 

All of these examples are in the book and actually take you through. Make this one thing and here's how you can roll it several times into the week and I have dozens of examples like this. It depends on what somebody wants deep and I help you again figure that out. What are your go-to things that set you up for this success? And it will declutter your mind. It just resonated so strongly with me when I was thinking about talking with you today and I thought you know, this system. I'd like to move into a couple of the tips to help with the routine and organization.

Amelia: Yeah, yeah, I mean, because what you're talking about here is really simplifying something that naturally we make a little more complicated, but you're giving us a roadmap. And so, yes, please share your tips and your organization. Absolutely.

Caterina: So going into decluttering your mind, I just, that resonated so strongly with me because that is, I'm like, that's what I'm doing. I'm decluttering their mind because it is, like, a clutter in your mind. I mean, the dreaded, oh my gosh, you know, I can't tell you how many times, well, we've all heard it. You're in soccer practice, you're running around with the kids. What are you making for dinner tonight? I don't know. I'm probably just going to go get something because my brain can't handle this. So it's a routine. It's an organizational routine. When you're in the habit of checking, I call it your daily check-in. It's like, think of your kitchen like it's a fun business or a hobby that you check in on and take inventory of daily. And it literally takes a minute. You open the refrigerator. I talk about freezer storage too. You open the freezer and you can see I have this and this once these, they're not neurotransmitters, but once your brain is connected, once your wire, your brain is wired to think this way, right? Once it's wired, you go, I've got that. I've got that. I can do this when I get home. Cause I have about 20 minutes or I don't have much, you know, I have more time I could make this.

Amelia: The connections in your brain. Yes.

Caterina: Or I need these three things. Is it like stopping at the grocery or grocery delivery, or can I replace it with a different idea? You come up with this plan and you just, it all snaps into place and you do this little check-in. You have this little routine of cooking that blows people's minds. Don't run away. Let's stick with me here, of cooking in 10 to 15 minute increments and people go, “I don't have 10 to 15 minutes.” You do because you just put a roast in the oven on Sunday before you went out to the garden. And you can - this was revelatory for me - not going to the post office and waiting in line. The day that I realized I could “click and ship” and call for a package pickup for my returns packages. It was like the happiest day. I have four returns. They're too big for the box at the post office. I'm always you know, it's 10, 15, 20 minutes.

I could have made aioli, pesto, and roasted a chicken. And you've gotten all that going. And so, you know, you put your packages on the porch. There's a lot of ways to save 10 or 15 minutes, which is also in the book. And you get into this routine of, I have these herbs that are about to go bad. I can whip up a pesto in my mini Cuisinart. That's our sauce for the week. It can freeze part of it. And everything just rolls along. You're, you're running your kitchen like a boss and you're de-cluttered.

And the food is just there. And the effort comes in the beginning to figure out the system, to get the ideas and then training your brain and your routine to do it. But once you have it, it's like, boom, everything's just there. And, and it's, it's very freeing, right? We create that connection. The benefit is at the table, the benefit for our health, enjoying food and.

We are eliminating stress, stress from our body, stress from sitting down to eat and stress in our mind, because we have to feed ourselves and we have to, a lot of us feed others. It's unavoidable. Right. So you can do it in a completely stressed state until you're an empty nester or, you know, um, invest a little time and create the routine.

Amelia: And you can encourage others to contribute, which I think you do so well. I love that your husband and that your kids are willing to show up on social media and in your content because you really give amazing examples of how kids and teens alike can really contribute and participate in the preparation, as well as the enjoyment. So I would love to hear just one or two things that you've found young people in particular really gravitate towards when it comes to food.

Caterina: Young children?

Amelia: Young children or teens or you know anyone who is old enough to contribute and participate in the kitchen.

Caterina: Okay, the first thing that comes to mind is the routine of helping to make it happen. And then I'll share some cooking tips. Um, like I just get chills thinking about this. I remember. So it's important to know that I've always worked full time and I run a financial business and it's very stressful. So I've done all the cooking and the kids and the sports and the working full time with a stressful job and all of my Return to the Table. 

So, only in my dreams am I home all day cooking. I work at home, but like my family says I live in the cave which is where my computer is. So I remember thinking, okay when I took that piece of paper out to figure out I was going to cook for everybody because what I was doing wasn't flying anymore.

Nobody wanted this and that fancy, you know, caponata and all this. So I said, you have to help. I managed to get through my day, get my kids, do my work and make dinner. And the idea, just the thought of setting the table would put me over the edge. I thought, oh my God, somebody has to help me. There's no reason people can't help me. So from the age of three and four, my kids were putting stuff on the table.

My daughter couldn't count the plates for years. We still laugh about this, whatever. It's not organized, who cares? The stuff's there. The second big thing for me was to bring it from the table into the kitchen and get the crumbs off the table. I hate wiping the table, I always have. And I feel like it may sound silly, but it's so luxurious to look at the table and the stuff is gone. And all I have to do is put leftovers away and my son started washing the dishes when he was four and a half. We have videos of him. So they all had, again, there was soap. I'd rather wipe the counter than have to do all the dishes myself. And he's been doing the dishes. He was 18 on Monday. So, one minute of help really takes the edge off. 

Because when you look at how long it takes to clean up a kitchen, I've timed it. Like that only took five minutes, but I swear it felt like it was going to take me 30 because I'm tired. So getting a little bit of help. I recommend everybody have their job because there's no negotiation. Like you said, you clean, let them pick. They can do it for 10 years. It really helps. 

There's a child safety knife. It's on my website. It's a, I probably have it right here. It is, um, that's why I do things in the kitchen. I like to stand, but you never know what I need. Um, you can see it's like, you can't cut yourself. I mean, I'm sure you can don't, don't really try, but it cuts vegetables and well, anything, but with that beautiful wavy curve. Oh my gosh. My kids loved this knife when they were little. I bought one for all of them. 

I put them at the table and say, “Cut these potatoes. Cut these carrots, and cut my vegetables.” We all have to know how to cook. It's an essential life skill and the sooner we learn the better. So the routine of helping with the cleanup and the setup I think is extremely valuable for everybody. It also teaches compassion and caring and teamwork. So there's a lot of emotional parenting, teaching skills that are going into that simple request from your children for your children to do that. And then having them chop vegetables, stir things, it could be a little messy at first, but they get better at it. You're investing in it. It's like teaching them to ski and ride a bike. It doesn't work the first time. But once it's good, everyone's off and cruising, right? Recipes, there's a lot of simple recipes.

Amelia: And I'm sure the kids are more invested in what they're going to eat when they contribute.

Caterina: 100%. Food is actually more exciting. If they cut that carrot and they see it in a stew, they're at - oh I just had 10 thoughts - I'll keep it simple. They see that carrot in the stew, that's the carrot they cut not, “What's this weird food you gave me?” There's so many things that can happen around that. It's not the cure for every picky eater syndrome, but it is a powerful thing when they're involved. Even if they just stir a pot, they know, because kids, they're often worried about what you're feeding them when they're picky. If they understand what it is, it definitely can help.

Amelia: I've actually seen a few videos with your teens now, young 20-somethings when they're having their friends over and cooking and just the joy and the surprise almost of not only how simple some of the meals that you prepare are, but like really exploring and taking interest in foods and elements that they might not necessarily have tried before.

Caterina: Mm-hmm. Pasta carbonara. I'm gonna say that's one of the classics. Because kids love pasta. They come over to your house. The default is often, no judgment, but often get a carryout pizza. And then, you know, if they're rotating houses, then they're like eating a lot of pizza. So our default being Italian is to whip up a pasta and I have an easy carbonara pasta recipe. It's just bacon and egg. You can do it in one pot.

So these kids were going crazy over it and eventually taught all of my kids' friends how to make it because, one, they should know how to do it. Two they come over and crash at my house and eat and after a couple years I'm like I don't mind cooking for you but you guys are old enough to go do this yourself and put the dishes in the dishwasher. So I've loved inspiring and getting these kids to participate.

Amelia: Yes.

Caterina: And to sit down and they don't have their cell phones and oh it's just so heartwarming. It is just beautiful. Yeah.

Amelia: I love it. Well, I could absolutely talk to you for ages. Is there any last thing that you'd like to share before I ask my closing question?

Caterina: Yes, actually it might overlap on that, but we'll go to tips. The daily check-in, my system, which has been extremely helpful is to keep a little list of those ideas. It could be a piece of paper on the fridge. I have a chalkboard in my kitchen and I write it down: I have chicken or chickens in the freezer and I don't want to forget to take it out.

Amelia: Yeah!

Caterina: That's for this week, there's herbs, can I find that 10, 15 minutes to make a pesto? So all these little ideas and your Garanimals will start to connect, but even my brain that's really wired for this, I need a list, because I can't remember. I'm like, I'm too busy to even stop and think some days. So having a list is a game changer. And organized chaos has always been acceptable to me. 

For example, you know, any way we can keep our space clean and I started doing this when my kids were with all their stuff, toys and everything. It drove me crazy to have all these things around because I'm feeling cluttered getting to the table. There's toys here and things there. I started what I call the basket system. So I have a basket at the foot of all the staircases in my house. So there's a basket that goes to the basement, a basket that goes to the main floor and then we have a little third floor. So I would take all their stuff if they didn't do something with it and I would put it in the appropriate basket. 

So it's chaos, but everything in that basket goes down, everything in that basket goes up. And my house, yeah, my house was always like, it felt completely organized. And then, you know, when we felt like it, either they had to do it or I did, empty out and put away everything in the basket. So keeping the kitchen space and the eating and the living space clean has always been really important to me, but I struggled to figure out how to…

Amelia: Contained.

Caterina: …make it happen every day with younger kids. So I just dump all their stuff in a basket. And, you know, it's the energy. It's just like the simple table setting, setting up the mood and the atmosphere. And one small detail, one small change is pretty impactful.

Amelia: I fully agree, right? It's those small choices and those small steps. And I think having a list of ideas or just go-tos is so helpful, because at the end of the day, we are frazzled, we are fried, and we're like, what can we cook, what can we make? And not even having to think that, but just having that bank of recipes, that bank of ideas, simple things to make. Oh, just it gives me a deep breath and a pause. So I appreciate that. 

So Caterina, what is one way that you use organization now as an adult? It can be obviously kitchen related, but I know you mentioned a career in finance and running a business from home, anything you'd like to share on organization now as an adult?

Caterina: Love this question too. I wasn't prepared for this, but here it is. It's priority and time chunking. And I talk about this in the book again, because it's about your why. We've heard people talk about their why, or what are your priorities? And when I focus on my priorities, because back up.

When you write down everything you have to do and you look at how long it's going to take and how many hours there are in a day, it is sometimes just impossible. Like, you know, it's not going to get done. And I used to just try to get everything done. And then one day I realized you're trying to do something that's impossible. So you're never going to win. You have to figure out what, when, how. So I look at everything I have to do. That's the wish list. Then I back into it. What are my first priorities? Self-care comes into there, yoga class comes into there. We never miss sitting down at dinner. That's top of the list. And then what can I just like, live with? Because those priorities are so important to me. They resonate in every aspect of my life. They're the most powerful thing I can do with my time. So that comes first. And then...

My friends laugh at me, but I have a color coded Google calendar. So I, I actually figure, okay, it's going to take me an hour to edit that chapter. It's going to take me two hours to call my 10 clients, whatever I have to do. And then I put it in a block and then the day is gone and you can switch the priority, but you can't create more time. But then you set yourself up for success. And if there's extra time, you know, you go and do the other things, but that is.

Amelia: Yes. Maybe, or you just leave those white blocks and get curious. Ha ha ha.

Caterina: That is my system, knock on wood. Like it usually works. You know, there's a lot of tweaking, but I don't want to, as I said, set myself up for failure and calculating the time it's logical, like I'm not going to keep trying different things. If it's not on the approved family ingredient list, it's not going to work. I could, you know.

Amelia: Yeah, I operate in a very similar fashion. And I love what you said about it is a never ending to-do list. And it's always going to refill the next day, even if you mark a few things off. And just that element of really concretely identifying how much time something's going to take and where it's going to fit into the day, because so much of our internal judgment is really around thinking that we have more time than we do. And once we can see where it fits and leave a little white space, a little blank space for transitions or just fun, free time to give your brain a break, I love that recommendation of calculating how much time and just keeping it simple and keeping it logical.

Caterina: Pesto at 8:15 has a 15-minute block. I'm doing parsley lemon pesto tonight at 8:15, hopefully. Because I don't want to forget the making. You shouldn't. There's always room at the table.

Amelia: Yum. Well, we all want to come over for dinner. Thank you. Thank you so much for chatting with me, Caterina. I would love for you to tell folks how they can get access to your newsletter, your easy to cook recipes, and any classes that you might have. And of course, we'll all keep our eyes out for later in August and early fall for your book.

Caterina: It's been fun. Thank you. The best place to connect is by going to my website and signing up for the email list. And I will also say that I usually send out two a month. Sometimes it's one, I'm not huge. I'm not gonna blast you with a whole bunch of nonsense emails. It's just so that we are connected outside of social media. And it's guaranteed, you know. 

So if something's coming up or I will announce I've written these five new articles on the website you might want to see or my book is coming out or I'm teaching a class and I put in a little something new and fun the only place that I'll share an idea or a thought in that newsletter. So it's really nice and that is the best way. Of course there's social media. I really try to keep everything I'm doing accessible to everybody, which is on my website so that if we need a break from social media or it's not part of our life, we're not dependent on that to connect. So that is the best place.

Amelia: And the website is dinnerwithcaterina.com, correct? Awesome, and we will link that in the show notes.

Caterina: Correct.

Thank you so much. I really enjoyed our conversation and I hope it helps. May people get to the table.

Amelia: Amazing. Yay, see you soon.

Caterina: Ciao.

Outro: Hey y'all, let's connect and chat on socials. You can find me on Instagram and Facebook @apleasantsolution. I'm also on LinkedIn at Amelia Pleasant Kennedy. Feel free to send me a quick note and let me know what you'd like to hear more about, or what home life organizational challenges are top of mind for you. Talk to y'all soon.