Madonna's unstoppable charisma at her concert was nothing short of a revelation for Julee, despite the notorious buzz about her punctuality and the surrounding controversies. This experience serves as a perfect segue into our latest episode, where we unwrap the enigmatic concept of mind over matter and the transformative potential of a positive mindset. As we share anecdotes spanning the personal to the professional, we unpack the compelling idea that our thoughts have tangible power over our experiences, from overcoming daily frustrations to facing life’s heftier challenges.
Ever wondered how staying upbeat can significantly alter your life's trajectory, even when dealing with something as daunting as a serious health issue? We get personal, discussing stories like Mary's courageous battle with cancer armed with positivity, and Julee's own journey through illness, offering a raw look at the intersection of mental fortitude and physical health. Yet, we don't shy away from the gritty truth about positive toxicity, acknowledging that there's a fine line between helpful optimism and detrimental denial, especially when it comes to grappling with mortality and the aging process.
To round off our thought-provoking exchange, we chat on the seemingly trivial yet telling aspects of life, like our snack choices, and how they reflect our larger mental outlook. We reveal the secret peace behind selective ignorance and why choosing where to focus your energies can be surprisingly liberating. From the subtle art of self-affirmation to the potent practices of visualization and meditation, we bring to light the science-backed benefits these habits have on our health and stress levels, leaving you armed with the insights to navigate whatever the year may throw your way with a resilient and positive spirit.
Madonna's unstoppable charisma at her concert was nothing short of a revelation for Julee, despite the notorious buzz about her punctuality and the surrounding controversies. This experience serves as a perfect segue into our latest episode, where we unwrap the enigmatic concept of mind over matter and the transformative potential of a positive mindset. As we share anecdotes spanning the personal to the professional, we unpack the compelling idea that our thoughts have tangible power over our experiences, from overcoming daily frustrations to facing life’s heftier challenges.
Ever wondered how staying upbeat can significantly alter your life's trajectory, even when dealing with something as daunting as a serious health issue? We get personal, discussing stories like Mary's courageous battle with cancer armed with positivity, and Julee's own journey through illness, offering a raw look at the intersection of mental fortitude and physical health. Yet, we don't shy away from the gritty truth about positive toxicity, acknowledging that there's a fine line between helpful optimism and detrimental denial, especially when it comes to grappling with mortality and the aging process.
To round off our thought-provoking exchange, we chat on the seemingly trivial yet telling aspects of life, like our snack choices, and how they reflect our larger mental outlook. We reveal the secret peace behind selective ignorance and why choosing where to focus your energies can be surprisingly liberating. From the subtle art of self-affirmation to the potent practices of visualization and meditation, we bring to light the science-backed benefits these habits have on our health and stress levels, leaving you armed with the insights to navigate whatever the year may throw your way with a resilient and positive spirit.
Here we go, Jules. We got some things to talk about today.
Speaker 2:Yes, we do. It's all about mind over matter.
Speaker 1:Mind over matter. Speaking of mind over matter, if you went to the Madonna concert would you be positively Prior to? There's been a lot of controversy with her in her concerts. Yeah she's a tiny bit of a diva. Like she's been late, I don't even know what all of she's getting sued. There's been all these kinds of things. But well, actually you did go to the Madonna concert, didn't you?
Speaker 2:I did.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so prior, did you psych yourself up with a positive attitude about what the outcome was going to be? Did you do that?
Speaker 2:To be very truthful and forthcoming. I was anticipating her being super late and I was going to be really annoyed.
Speaker 1:So, based on the things that you heard yeah, based on what I heard and we even.
Speaker 2:So Mary and I went, we even got there. We got there late, we went and had a little bite to eat, had a drink and stuff Didn't even get to the show.
Speaker 1:Because you probably knew it would be all right.
Speaker 2:Right. So we got there about I don't know, nine o'clock or so. We're supposed to start at eight 30. And she has a DJ play. It's quite a performance. I mean, it's quite a big production, this setup that they had, but they didn't come on to about quarter to 10. And so she had a DJ there. That was kind of, I guess, entertaining people.
Speaker 2:And then they had someone from one of the drag shows in the area, I think, that came and was doing like some fun things up on the stage, but just to entertain people. When she finally did come out, what I did notice was first of all, it was amazing, it was a total bucket list show. But she is injured, I think, because she had a big brace on her knee and then she and she wasn't really doing the whole dancing thing like she normally would.
Speaker 1:Okay, she was 65, maybe.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, she's an amazing shape. Yeah Right, she's only five, three.
Speaker 1:I didn't realize she was that tiny. I didn't realize she was that tiny either. She's pretty tiny.
Speaker 2:But she's. I think she was on painkiller. Okay, this is totally like I am just giving my opinion and Mary's opinion. I think she may have been on painkillers or something because she seemed like she was having a little difficulty moving around, moving around, and then she had a guy who's like her bestie or something that was with her during part of the time. But, very, there are some really good social messages. She had a whole segment that was about all of the people that have perished for mates and she's a big supporter of the LGBTQ community, which there was an abundance of individuals there from the LGBTQ community and just women also dressed up that were dressed up in their material girl outfits and just, you know, the bows in their hair.
Speaker 1:I'm pretty sure I was Madonna in 1985.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, the glove, remember the glove.
Speaker 1:I had lace gloves with no finger you know, with it yeah. And I wore the bow of my hair. I had the curly permed hair.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I just I can't believe that. So back when I don't know, I was 21 or something, she was my jam and I had this little sports car and I would play her music at the top of the radio, you know, with the windows down and the whole bit. And that's of course, what I remember is just cruising through with that movie she was desperately seeking, so let's just say she's, that's not really her calling acting, yeah, yeah. And I think that was probably in the 90s, wasn't it? That was the 80s.
Speaker 1:Was it really?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, that's definitely not her calling, but she had two of her kids there. Yeah and no.
Speaker 1:I think it was the 80s, anyways.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, one of her kids is an amazing pianist. I mean, just she's 18 years old. And then she had another one of her daughters there, her adopted daughter there. That was maybe 14 or so, 13, 14. And it was a dancer. Yeah, it was. It was a good show and we actually left before it ended because it started late, not as late as it had started in other places. When Lena went, my niece in New York, she didn't come on stage until 1130. That's crap, it's ridiculous. I was pissed and I guess she is getting sued about all that stuff. So maybe I mean my speculation is maybe with the injury she's having had some trouble, you know staying awake with the medicine, I don't know, but whatever.
Speaker 1:I do want me some Madonna, though off my bucket list she got a lot of good hits. Yeah, I mean, get into the groove. Lucky Star, vogue Material Girl like a virgin.
Speaker 2:That's probably your favorite song, right Like a virgin.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, you can always go hey of course in the clubs they'd always say fucked for the very first time.
Speaker 2:I don't remember that.
Speaker 1:Stop it.
Speaker 2:Well, hey, I did have a little issue with Mind Over Matter, so you're right.
Speaker 1:Going into this thinking, oh my.
Speaker 2:God we're going to be home at three in the morning. Yep, like I really care. I used to be home at three in the morning all the time, but I want to make sure Mary got home and got some rest. Yeah, it was good. So Mind over matter.
Speaker 1:Yeah, mind over matter is kind of an interesting subject. It's something that I definitely am or proponent of believing in, and you might think of it in a lot of different ways, like the power of positive thinking, right, but there's a lot of different instances that can be truly effective in your life and that perception that mind over matter what and how and the way that you're thinking can change the physicality of things in real life Makes a huge difference. And it's kind of a hard concept to grasp, really, if it's not something that you're used to doing, collectively thinking about doing you know, something that you are intentionally doing.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Because I think that's how it starts out you have to be intentional about different things with regard to mind over matter, with the power of positive thinking, and then, when you start doing it enough, it, to a certain degree, comes into play somewhat naturally.
Speaker 2:I think. I think you're right. When I think of this phrase the power of positive thinking what immediately comes to mind is the whole mentality of cup half empty versus cup half full.
Speaker 2:I remember when I worked at Nordstrom there was this guy that worked there. This is a great example, like super negative, great guy, but like you're a negative constantly, you know, constantly negative. And we had remember when the stadium was built down there we had one of the bricks. We bought one of the bricks for him that said block the bad, catch the good, because he was constantly looking to catch the bad. So the mindset was constantly thinking that things weren't going to work, constantly Do them and glue, Do them and glue, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And of course it's not really how my mind works. I always I think it's annoying sometimes to people like my mom always give her the positive side of things and she's like can?
Speaker 1:you just agree with me. No, I can't. I can't disagree with you.
Speaker 2:But I think that that phrase is used a lot of the times when there's a hardship situation that might be coming up or there's some challenge that appears to be insurmountable or that maybe people don't believe you can handle. Like maybe it's your goal is to run a marathon, a 26.2 mile marathon. Well, if I told you, hey, Michelle, I'm going to run a marathon, you'd look at me and go great, Because you know that that would be something very difficult for me to do. It's something you'd have to really want.
Speaker 1:I mean it might as well been a marathon, but on my 50th birthday I ran the 8k which is just like five miles. But see, you did it. But that's for me, because I am not athletic, I am not a runner, I don't do any of that shit.
Speaker 2:But it's a big deal is what I'm saying, but yeah so to your point.
Speaker 1:That totally made me think of that.
Speaker 1:I didn't even put that parallel in my mind when we were talking about this topic, but definitely I don't know why, but I just decided that I was going to do that. I was turning 50. The race was on my 50th birthday. My brother has type one diabetes, so I had all these reasons to do it, something I'd never done before and I just literally every day I went in and worked out for like 90 days straight without a day off, and I started kicking it into gear and, yeah, I just knew I was going to do it and I started feeling better and better about it. It was really hard.
Speaker 2:Girlfriend. I remember this because girlfriend was rocking those selfies in the gym. I'm like damn, look at her ass.
Speaker 1:It was hard, but I did beat the bridge and I finished the race. I wasn't trying to do it in any that. Those were my two goals. Be, the bridge, finish the race, and I did do both, but definitely the mindset totally made a difference in what that outcome was going to be.
Speaker 2:Well, I don't even know how you could go into that with a different mindset than the positive or manifesting. I think a lot of this is having that internal talk, that self talk.
Speaker 2:And I know that I can speak for myself. I'm sure it's probably the same for you and other people too. But your inner self talk can sometimes be negative and it's all the things that you're kind of thrown at during the course of your life. You have to really step back and think differently, especially when you're not feeling super confident about something, so it does come back. I think it also does come back to the confidence level somebody has, and if they've got a group of individuals who are their cheerleaders, it makes the hugest difference, because you've got other people out there believing in you and believing in what you're doing, that are part of your circle and you don't want to let them down either.
Speaker 1:So you're going to push forward, and until you have that, though, you have got to be your own. You've got to be your own cheerleader at all times, and that brings to mind for me when I first made the decision to leave my marriage and I started going through difficult situation after difficult situation after difficult situation, like when is it going to end Like?
Speaker 1:when is it going to end? Yeah, really the first moment in my life and events leading up to it, but where I really had to continually give myself those pep talks and have those conversations of. You are completely capable of doing this. People do it all the time. You can do it too. You just have to figure it out and literally these little pep talks on a daily basis, and when something would go wrong or sideways or be really hard, you just continually do that.
Speaker 2:So you got to get into your own head as opposed to letting some of the stuff that's held you back in the past, and it's also about maybe wanting something really badly. So let's talk about a couple of examples of when mind over matter can make a difference. So I'm just thinking right off the top of my head about the traffic in Seattle.
Speaker 2:And I'm sure, this is the same everywhere. Right, we all have traffic. We have very limited freeways here Just one major I-5 and the other one's the 405. So it's constantly backed up. And I can think of times when I have been in the car and just been freaking, pissed off, because I can't get to where I need to go. Of course I'm pushing it to the very last second. So that's a whole other issue we won't get into today. But I remember thinking to myself it's like there's nothing I can do. There's nothing I can do If I honk at somebody, it's not going to make any difference. If I move over to this lane and get one car ahead, it's really not going to make any difference.
Speaker 1:If I get off the exit and go somewhere a different way probably going to take longer you just have to sometimes resign yourself to the fact that you don't have control over the circumstances that you're in, but you have control over how you handle them, because what you're talking about, like the honking, the yelling, all the things that could go along with that, which don't help the situation at all, it's not going to make you get there any quicker, it's going to raise your blood pressure, all of those things.
Speaker 2:And you turn into an asshole. The energy that you release within yourself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's just like no good. Those are the things that are not conducive for good health. I think it plays into that also.
Speaker 2:So you got to want something, though I go back to that whole thing. So in this particular case, you're talking about a scenario where you don't have control. Do you have control, though? Could you leave earlier, right, or where you're going? Could you call and let them know where if you have to be somewhere that you're going to be late, that can take a little bit of that pressure off. And then I say, play some music or listen to a podcast, like a blonde brunette and a mic.
Speaker 1:And the kind of music is also. That's the thing is just back to. I know you love this because it's your word for the year, but the intention behind everything to be intentional about the outcomes and what you're putting into it, to have the outcome and not just a willy-nilly outcome, but an outcome that you can envision and that you can try to manifest.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know that that's a little bit of a woo-woo word. You know manifest, but I really truly believe that it makes a difference. If you can kind of see what's going on in your head or you can envision it and you want it bad enough, it's going to happen and speak it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, go listen to any successful, goal-oriented person that has accomplished many things and had success, and those are the things that you hear, you envision yourself, you write it down, you say it out loud, the constant affirmations and to your point manifestation. It all comes into play. With what? The outcomes?
Speaker 2:will be. Another component of that might also be that you remove things from your daily life that are going to prevent you from hitting those goals. So here I am on the podcast talking about goals and intention. We talked about that and learning Spanish. That's an intention of mine this year. Do I want it really badly? I mean, I've talked about it for a freaking long time. I need to get shit or get off the pot, right? So I'm getting off the pot. I'm started my lessons. Am I going to be fluent? No, but I'm going to know enough by the time I go to a Spanish-speaking country to be able to have at least a remotely understandable conversation. That's my goal. So if I had my goal was to be fluent, I would be approaching it at a completely different pace. But I'm just trying to be able to communicate. So that's the step that I'm in. So if I can do that and make that happen, when I can do that and make that happen, not if I'm going to feel pretty good about it.
Speaker 1:See, in the word you just corrected. Those are the things that really do make a difference.
Speaker 2:But look at my first thought process was going to. If and so we have to really kind of rethink or rewire how we approach things if we want to make progress on something. And again, the whole idea of mind over matter is really being able to control how we respond to something, or be able to control the outcome by not letting things die, like keeping them alive, like doing the things we're saying we're going to do, do you?
Speaker 1:ever.
Speaker 1:I mean, I know you were talking about that gentleman at Nordstrom yeah, you knew doom and gloom, but everybody must know somebody because I certainly do like that person who is always professing the worst case scenario, or you know, it's that person that wants to ask somebody out and, like you know, I know you're probably going to say no, but the approach, you know the yeah, the approach. But who's negative about so many things? And really that's the energy that they just carry all the time and a lot of times there's really not positive things that are going on in their life. Right, but you wonder what?
Speaker 2:Because they're speaking it.
Speaker 1:You like, speak it into existence. I'm telling you, it's true.
Speaker 2:Then that reaffirms for you that, oh gosh, I was on the right track, and so you might be the person who just keeps going down that road.
Speaker 1:And it's not to be so sickening. Like you know, the glass half full all the time, right.
Speaker 2:It can be nauseating when people are like toxically positive. We'll talk about that in a second.
Speaker 1:But at the same time, when it becomes your lifestyle and it's just kind of who you are. I think, there's a difference. Yeah, Somebody that's trying to learn that and maybe put those behaviors into play. It might be something that's more noticeable, but when once you and like I, stopped watching the news a long time ago because that is something along with technology which has come, and we wonder why kids now have so much anxiety and depression in their life.
Speaker 1:They're exposed to so much more than we were. You know, we have the 10 o'clock news or whatever. If we were home by then, right. And kids now, when they have phones at a young age, they go on the internet. There's so much more that they are exposed to. That is not positive. The world events that are happening right now in Russia and Israel and Palestine, and all of those things that, oh my gosh, you sounded like a political person for a moment.
Speaker 2:That was like a really short moment.
Speaker 1:And you know, with the presidential election coming along and all of the things that are surrounded with that, there's just so many things, you know, and the social media aspect of things that young, the younger generation, has to deal with. I mean, everybody does, but we never did at that early age, so there's just so many things that I think contribute to that. And then, as we get older, there's there's what is it called self self, your self perception of aging. So as you age and they they talk about when you're about 65, that's kind of when there's all these notions and things that start coming into play with those perceptions, and most of them are negative perceptions.
Speaker 2:So that they've created throughout their years. You mean, and I've never been, have they haven't been validated or they have been validated.
Speaker 1:Well, we do our own validation, don't we? That's where that comes in, but it's all the social stereotypes that go along with that. So, like I was saying, the younger generation, what they're exposed to. Now, here we are heading into those 60s at some point and what is the perception of ourselves as we're aging? There's a lot of social stereotypes that go along with that. I need to fill my lips. I need to get rid of those lines. There's so many things that, again, social stereotypes that go along with what our self perception is of how we age, how does mind over matter and kind of looking at like that topic help?
Speaker 1:us. It's all about how we think we are thinking of ourselves. I have no problem with filling your lips, filling your lines you can do all that stuff. I just use that as an example of the social stereotypes that go along with the perception of how we're supposed to view ourselves and do for ourselves as we're aging and for some people that might be what it is, but I think it's the public in general that holds those stereotypes, and so it's yourself. Talk yourself, thinking how you're feeling about yourself, how you're vibing about yourself. Is physical activity going to be good as you age? Yes, physical activity is going to be good as you age. Is good skincare going to be good as you age? Yes, good skincare is going to be good.
Speaker 2:You're still going to age one way or another, but it's like aging gracefully, I guess, or even accepting that, because when you look at I look at mind over matter. I'm aging, you're aging. It's like, am I okay with it? I don't really have a choice, and so we have to look at it like, well, how can we do this in a way that we are cool with it, the way that we're comfortable with it, and a lot of the things that we choose to do for ourselves whether it be self-care, whether it be the exercise we do or the skincare routine or whatever that helps us stand up a little straighter and feel more confident. Going into that time frame, we did talk about one of the episodes we have coming up after. I don't know if it'll be before or after this one, but is about feeling invisible you know, when you get to be the age that we are and above and.
Speaker 2:I think that that plays directly into it. Let's talk a little bit more about the examples. So people have better, you know, like some examples of how mind over matter can play into things, and I mentioned before that. I want to talk a little bit about positive toxicity. Yes, and because I have thoughts about that and I'm curious what you think. So, anyway, let's go back to.
Speaker 2:Another example would be disease. Let's say someone has cancer. Let's use Mary as an example. Okay, look at how she has gone into this process. She has chosen to take a positive look at things. Is she scared? Hell, yeah, she's scared. Is she doing everything that she needs to do to make her outcome the best she possibly can? She absolutely is.
Speaker 2:But if she walked into this with a negative mindset, if she walked into this saying, oh my gosh, I don't think any of this stuff is going to work, I don't, you know, I'm losing my hair it's like, you know, really having that negative feeling towards herself. I truly feel that those things that would be in her brain would be directly impacting her ability to get better, and that happens with a lot of people. 100% agree, I mean. So what we think and what we do is a direct correlation to the outcome that we have. And so with that one I mean, oh, I have been in this place where I had cancer. I never really looked at it that way at all. I was just like, no, it's going to be fine, yeah, just get it taken care of.
Speaker 1:I was very almost disconnected from it, I think not, and I'm not saying that it was necessarily healthy, but that's how I dealt with it.
Speaker 2:She's just very positive about everything and her outcome is going to be good and she has a very aggressive form of cancer. So she has a lot of follow up treatments and things that have to be done. But you know what she's going to be okay, I know she's going to be okay. Yeah, and a lot of that has to do with her confidence level about what's happening with her and the level of support of course she has and what she's putting out there in the universe, because if she thought about it differently, I think that we would be looking at it a little differently.
Speaker 2:It wouldn't be so, she wouldn't be so open to talk about it. Right, you know that sort of thing. That's so true. The whole idea of mind over matter is really a phrase or a concept that's used a lot in psychology. When you think about trying to really gear someone up for adversity, maybe that might be coming. They have to have that inner strength. All of that directly relates to this. It's also something that perhaps in like religious settings or spiritual settings, that you would run across.
Speaker 1:I mean, there's so many things in our lives that have to do with that, that we subconsciously are utilizing the mind over matter aspect of things and well, like like being on, like a diet or whatever. Yeah, that's like when you're consciously trying to eat healthier to help lose weight, whatever it might be. Go into the gym, all of those things. Getting out of bed, drinking water, staying hydrated, it's so complicated.
Speaker 2:There's so much we have to do.
Speaker 1:It all sounds so trivial, but these are things that I think you're stressing me out. If you're going to lay there, like I do a lot of times, and hit snooze, you know 500 times my day is going to drag like that. But I do notice the days where I literally tell myself just get up, michelle, you got to do this anyway. Just get up and get it going, get my coffee, put my makeup on all the things I like to do, and you know, it just gets a start to the day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's funny because Sundays are, like my mind, over matter day.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Because it's the day where I'm kind of able to clean it and I, if my head doesn't feel right, if I don't have things, my laundry is not done the dinners, just I feel like I'm disorganized and I don't like that feeling starting off on a new week.
Speaker 1:Monday.
Speaker 2:Monday is like one of my favorite days, which is kind of weird for people, but it's literally a fresh start. It's literally a fresh start to that week and every time we get a Saturday I'm like Damn, I don't get very much. It was a poem I heard a long time ago about how many Saturdays you get in your lifetime.
Speaker 1:Oh geez, I know you were talking about Christmases the other day.
Speaker 2:I know here we go with Saturday.
Speaker 1:Well, it's because I've had a birthday recently, I think, is where you know you start thinking about your, your mortality and you start thinking about oh gosh, it's like your time and people we've had you know lost there's a lot of you know people are our own age, passed on, and it's it's kind of 2023 was kind of a year like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm very much a realist, so, but I would say I'm a positive realist. But the reality is that there's a lot of shit that's going on that's not good, and so I almost feel like going into the positive toxicity thing that sometimes people just ignore that and they're like oh no, everything's going to be fine. Or oh gosh, everything will work out, blah, blah, blah. And I'm looking at them going that's just, that's too easy. That's like sticking your head in the sand to me, and it's it's not because I don't want things to be good or positive. It's more kind of like there's no, you have no merit to base that on. Give me something good to go with, and then I'll believe you. You know, or I create my own, I create my own, go, okay, yeah, that's kind of a shitty situation, but there's ways we can look at this that are going to make it be different. You know, like if I get in a car accident, at least I, at least I'm not in the hospital.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And it's like the silver lining. I guess the silver lining is what I'm talking about. You have to look at things in a way to where there is a silver lining, because there's going to be horrible, bad stuff that happens to us, but if you let it get you down completely, you're not going to be able to have the strength for the things you truly need to have strength for like other people in your life that might need your help or might need your support, or for your own self.
Speaker 1:I'm thinking about as you're saying these things. It is I don't know why, but it's making me think of Zachary.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, and really that's a great mind or a matter of when.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's what I'm saying is like that situation and everything that you went through personally in your marriage relationship, all of those things I mean. You could have said I am not going to have any more kids, I don't want to go through that. When I lost my dog, I'm like I never want to do that again. I never want to feel that way again. But to your point to your point.
Speaker 2:It's like in order to love, you have to be mindful of the fact that there's going to be pain. One does not go without the other. If you love somebody and they leave you, they go away, they go to heaven, whatever. It's great point because there was a long period of time where I was trying to find the cup half empty view of that and angry about everything. And then I started realizing that as I got older and more mature I think it was a lot that had to do with maturing and everything was because I was pretty young. I was like Zoe's age when.
Speaker 2:I had these other kids, so it's like those guys would never have been here, and so I look at that like his gift. So you kind of start looking at things from a different perspective, using your circumstances to help other people.
Speaker 2:I would speak at different things and I was like a grief parent and stuff like that for people, so you're able to take it and use it for something good, even though it's shitty and it's horrible, but there's good that can come out of every bad situation.
Speaker 2:Maybe it's human kindness that you run across when things are happening or you see, like, all the destruction that's going on in the world right now and the amount of pain and suffering that's taking place, and frankly, I feel pretty helpless about a lot of that because we're watching a lot of these things happen. Is there a silver lining or light at the end of the tunnel, or whatever you want to say for people that are going through that? I think everybody's going to have a different view on things on it. Could it destroy their lives if their family's gone? Hell, yeah, sure, you know it's going to be a whole like refinding yourself, refiguring out what you want to do. Some people don't want to, yeah, and those people end up taking their own lives or end up leaving this world because they just can't fathom doing life without the people that are there, or can't get themselves out of a funk or a deep depression or things like that, and so that's the other alternative.
Speaker 1:Something that you brought up when you were just talking about that situation, because you got older and wiser and more mature on things. I was reading something where they were talking about that there's three misconceptions of aging, and that's one of them is, as you grow older, everything is in decline. You know our intellectual skills, things like that, but as far as the misconceptions go, as they talked about them, these three, they then said it is absolutely just that misconception because we have control over what our intellectual skills are and what they're you know, as we I think it was between the ages of 20 and 70. So as you progress on in the years you do, you become more intellectually mature and the skills you have with communicating and the things that you're retaining and the things we learn, for goodness sake, just on these life journeys.
Speaker 2:Right. Some of the things we're learning, though, might not be positive. Well, true, I mean, I guess you have to figure out how to mix all that in, because there are going to be things like you're going to learn that who's going to show up if you have a big, huge adversity in your life. You're going to learn who shows up for you, and it may not always be good.
Speaker 1:Maybe it's not always good and it's. It is disappointing, but I think at the same time, it's necessary. Yeah, so there's, there's the part, there's the caveat that you have to keep in mind and and you learn from that.
Speaker 2:Well, and you are. I look at it like you might. In that scenario, you're actually at an advantage for yourself because you know what you're dealing with.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:So what you thought was good isn't, and so you kind of try to find another direction to go.
Speaker 1:So one of the so the second of the three was that we have no control over the aging process. What do you think about that?
Speaker 2:Well, we're, we're getting older every day, sure Well, and you kind of brought this up a little bit earlier.
Speaker 1:We're, we're. I mean, that's not you can do about it, we're getting, but there is there is because you can.
Speaker 2:I mean you can see, you could physically see, or we know people who have made an effort to it. When I say age gracefully, yeah, they're taking care of themselves, right.
Speaker 1:And that's where the misconception is that because you do have control, you can. You can get out and go. It doesn't have to be like all these really self or time consuming things. Just go out and walk for 30 minutes. Yeah, do something socially. Maybe once a month, intentionally do that, you know, so that you're in a social setting where you're having conversations.
Speaker 2:So what Healthy, what happens if you're not doing all those things. Thinking, which we start to see with people who are progressively becoming more elderly? Yeah, is that they start to exist.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:As opposed to live Right. There's a big difference between the two. It's like existing is. I don't want to be in a position where I will ever exist. I mean, obviously I want to exist, but you know what?
Speaker 1:I mean yeah.
Speaker 2:I want to be in a position where I'm living my life Right, and so you have to go into that thought process now, at the age that we're at, to be able to set yourself up for that down the road. If you're saying, oh gosh, I don't, I'm not going to retire until I'm 65. And by then I might have a heart attack and not be able to travel, well, god damn it.
Speaker 1:If you keep talking that way, you're probably going to have that happen. That talk, man. Yeah, you're saying it out loud and you are manifesting nothing but all the negative.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and maybe there would be roadblocks getting in your way, but that doesn't mean the roadblocks stop you Right? So again, kind of going back to confidence with who you are, the decisions you're making and the personal inner strength that someone has to be able to make those things happen. Some of that we talked about a little bit of the practices on mind over matter. But before we get to that, I wanted to ask you your thoughts on the positive toxicity that we have mentioned a couple times.
Speaker 1:Do you know anybody that's that way To a toxic degree? Not really, I think. Some people think that I tend to maybe be oblivious and live in a bubble. Really, I don't think I'm positively toxic.
Speaker 2:No, god no.
Speaker 1:No, but just the things that I do to limit the intake of negativity. I think sometimes might be viewed as ignorant. Maybe ignorance is bliss. There's that whole time.
Speaker 2:Because, it's just what you choose to invest your energy in. Yeah, and.
Speaker 1:I know of the things that are going on the world. I mean I keep up on.
Speaker 2:We share. I tell you all the time I keep up on these things. Oh my God, can you believe? Blah, blah, blah yeah.
Speaker 1:You know I see stuff but I don't dive in and get sucked in and have it be an hour later and all of this stuff has gone into my brain.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:I don't do that. I can't think of anybody off the top that I know. I know what you're saying is like bearing your head in the sand. That's why it made me think of ignorance is bliss and living in that bubble to a degree, but I kind of don't think there's. I don't think there's, I don't think it's wrong.
Speaker 2:So my view. So I'll just kind of tell you my view. I do know one person who's kind of like that, but I don't think there's an intention of that person being. That person's a very genuine person, very genuine person, but super like you never heard. I've never heard anything negative come out of his mouth, to the point where it's even when he's frustrated about something or whatever, he always is finding the silver lining.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And whatever it is. But when I think of positive toxicity, I think of someone who really is not willing to go deeper than the surface. So they're like everything's going to be great. You just need to be positive and think, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know, instead of trying to understand what's taking place and helping, maybe, their friend navigate?
Speaker 1:what that looks like.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so to me that comes across as a lack of sincerity. I mean, maybe that's not how other people look at it, but with me it's like if I see someone who's positively, positively toxic, they're not going to necessarily be the person I talk to about an issue or a problem. I see what you're saying.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Because their answers are going to be very surface answers, Right? You know, when I'm not looking for surface answers, I'm looking. Let's dive into something and figure it out.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, what I was talking about, that's different. I think, not toxic positivity. So because what you're saying, yeah, that totally makes sense and I do agree with what you're saying, somebody like that would be, I think, would tend to be more seemingly insincere.
Speaker 2:Insincere, insincere. Yeah Well, they just. They're not, basically not getting everything's kind of like brushing your shoulder off. You're not really getting involved in anything. So I mean, that's my interpretation.
Speaker 1:It makes me think of Mark Schwimmer in that Friends episode I'm fine, everything's fine. And he's like this in this really high voice. You know, I don't know why my voice sounds like this, but really. I'm fine, but really you're not yeah.
Speaker 2:So let's talk about maybe a little bit of the practices. We can just touch on them. We mentioned visualization, thank you.
Speaker 1:Conjunction junction what's your function?
Speaker 2:Yeah, Also meditation. I have a hard time with it. I do like 10 minutes in the morning when I wake up and it's more kind of like I just will lay there and just with my eyes shut. I'm not even at a bed.
Speaker 1:Yet have you ever done a guided meditation? Oh yeah, guided meditation Not visual, is it?
Speaker 2:Well, I guess, when they take you on a walk in the forest, that sort of thing, yeah, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:If you've never done it, people, you should try it, because really I don't know why it's, it just gets.
Speaker 2:I get lost in it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, it just takes your mind off of everything that's going on. Yes, yes, give your mind a rest.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, I've done that before when I really needed to get out of my head. Yeah, you know so I don't, but I haven't done that that often. I think more with meditation. It's really about having good, positive, conscious thoughts for your day. For me, that's what it's about, or it's like what I want to accomplish for the day, or thinking about I don't know what's important.
Speaker 1:Well, I think too, when you intentionally do that, because I was doing that for a while actually.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And I kind of fell off the bandwagon. But I was intentionally having those thoughts at first thing in the morning, Right, and how I wanted my day to go, what I wanted to accomplish. I literally would lay there like what you're saying and tell myself what the outcomes were going to be for that day, Instead of doing all the habitual things picking up my phone, scrolling through the socials, looking at the new you know different things like that and then you know, turning my music on and making my coffee, and I still would do those after the intentional stuff. But there was really different outcomes when you intentionally do that as opposed to habitually doing the things that you're so into.
Speaker 2:You don't even think about it Exactly, it's just you're going through the motions. It's kind of like when you're driving from here to the grocery store, you don't really think about your route because you've done it so many times it's similar to that.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But yeah, to your point, I have completely in agreement with you and it doesn't have to be a lot of time. I don't think it needs to be a ton of time, but enough to be able to give yourself a boost.
Speaker 1:You know they've done studies on all this. Probably they have. There's been extensive research, scientific research, on the outcomes of many of the practices that we have been talking about, and the outcomes are all very positive for your health, for your mental health, for your physical health. They find blood pressure reducing yeah, reducing, just like so many things, better health benefits overall when you put some of these things into practice.
Speaker 2:It's true and realistically, I feel like I'm kind of a busy bee. So if I'm just speaking from my own perspective, it's hard for me to do these things. Yeah, it's hard for me to.
Speaker 1:It's not. It doesn't come naturally to me.
Speaker 2:I'm always running around or having my mind on different things and she is, yeah and well, like, I think, great example. She's so cute, but she goes to her. Her meditation timeframe is like with yoga, yeah, you know. So I think everybody finds their own way to make things like this work. Have you ever done like mirror talk? Yes, yeah Do you put in little notes or anything on your mirror. I have, yeah, because you're.
Speaker 1:just because when you're getting ready in the morning it's like you look at yourself and you're just like I'm going to kick ass today, yeah.
Speaker 2:You know, and you or I have my thing written on my intention or whatever written on my mirror. It's written on my bulletin board, little bulletin board I have behind my door. I will go back there and look at that bulletin board and I'm it's for me to keep track of my workouts, really basically, and it's like I forgot to fill it in last week, so I fill it in today, you know but I'm just trying to keep track of it and be able to go so many times a week or whatever I need to do.
Speaker 2:So that's what I have there. But I think constant positive self talk, positive reinforcement of whatever it is you're trying to accomplish, or even just being positive to be happy.
Speaker 1:I had one on my mirror for a long time, just recently too. I always have more than enough money and you know I always find ways to be able to take care of whatever it is. That may seem silly, but it's not silly. Yeah, but yeah to your point you know many people are probably going.
Speaker 2:That's a great idea. Especially if there if anybody has any sort of like a scarcity mindset it comes from a lot of different things. That's a good positive reinforcement, yeah, to give yourself, because you're obviously need to feel confident about your saving money, your budgeting, you're doing things like that. So, yeah, that's actually a good thing.
Speaker 1:And with decision making, just different things that go into. That doesn't mean I'm going to find a you know $20,000 check under my pillow, but you know it just like comes into. But, if you did, you'd take me where I remember you were somewhere Spanish speaking because you're learning it Exactly.
Speaker 2:Setting the intention is another one. So setting your goals, setting your intention so I think, for me anyway, that comes in that whole meditation timeframe, and they may be the same things that you're focusing on every day, whether it's the gym, or it's your health or, like today, great example, I got this recipe that I found it was viral on Instagram and it's like 400 calories, 45 grams of protein. It looks so damn good. So what do I do? Michelle got me the containers. I'm making her some, too, and I made them their meal prepping for the week, and I'm really excited about it because I will have my dinner plan for the week and I'm going to just see how it goes, I know, I'm weird about eating food Sunday.
Speaker 1:So this actually, now that you're bringing that up okay, this will be a good Well what I was thinking.
Speaker 2:I'm going to give one to you. So you'll have it, and then I'll have four and I'll probably put one in the freezer and then I'll have a couple out that I can use and I'll mix it in with other things. But it's kind of a nice thing to do, to be able to prepare or, like I prepared, my peanut butter protein balls. So, and I have enough, so I can have one every day and if I really want to, I can have two.
Speaker 1:But they're my little treat. She has a little obsessed with that, I'm a little obsessed with that, and they are pretty good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so talking to yourself changing your habits, that's another one, so undoing negative habits that you have. That's hard to do I know, I don't know what some of those things could be, but there's probably a ton that aren't good for people that they just need to rethink. Other doing a lot of it might have to do with mindset and how they talk to themselves, that negative self talk. That's immediately what comes to mind.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of different aspects and I'm just using this one as an example. But a friend of mine who is on the road quite a bit for work and eats out you know, when we're eating fast food that's exactly what it is and recently she's like I'm going to buy more. I'm going to buy apples and peanut butter and eat those in the car when I'm driving that way. So setting yourself up for success, yes, yeah, so just there's just like a little example of something. But yeah, changing habits.
Speaker 2:Yeah, or the other thing was eliminating things that prevent you from reaching your vision or your goals.
Speaker 1:Full potential, yeah, and so that could be.
Speaker 2:If we're talking food, that could be not having ice cream in your house.
Speaker 1:I cannot buy potato chip. Rick and I were both talking about this the other day. He was like buy potato chips because the girls like that having the chips.
Speaker 2:But they'll never make it to the girls.
Speaker 1:And then the girls were there. They're like why do you buy these chips? Because they do like them, but you know he figured out that he was buying them, the girls, but then he would be the one ending up eating them.
Speaker 1:So he just can't, and that's what I told them to. I'm like I cannot buy potato chips. If I have the potato chips in the house, I will, because I can't just eat one. I know that's a tagline on the Lay's commercial that I literally, whatever they are, I can't. I will eat half the bag in one sitting.
Speaker 2:You know, on a side note, have you had Doritos? Not in a long time, but you know I don't even like them, but if I have one I'm done. Yeah, yeah, I'm like that with like cookies, and stuff.
Speaker 1:This is total, but you talked about Doritos and Cheetos. Are you a liquor or a scraper when it comes to all the orange stuff that ends up on your fingers? Do you lick it off or do you scrape it with your teeth? No, I lick it. I'll like it, I'll scrape it with my teeth, but it's like.
Speaker 2:It's like. I love Cheetos.
Speaker 1:Like I love.
Speaker 2:I love the Cheetos but and so I'll get like the little thingy of them. You know, of course I'll have to fill it up again, but it kind of will gross me out, yeah, If I have too much of that stuff on my hand because it's fake food.
Speaker 1:I know that's and yeah, you have to scrape it off with it. Yeah, it's like fake food, it just and you like, thank God.
Speaker 2:she likes potato chips that have olive oil or whatever. She likes all this weird stuff that I don't like, so I don't eat her chips, which is very good. Salt and vinegar.
Speaker 1:That's what you're thinking.
Speaker 2:Salt and vinegar, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, barbecue.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but never Barbecue I'll eat. Yeah, barbecue I'll do.
Speaker 1:But especially the kettle cook. They have to be Kettle Cooked. Lay's Jalapeno chips with cream cheese is so good.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, that's just sounds so disgusting Like I would never eat that. I like the Tim's Cascade chips that are folded in half, because they're crunchy.
Speaker 1:I like ones that are folded and I have always said I think they should. There should be some potato. Anybody that's in the potato chip business, if you're listening. There needs to be a bag of potato chips where they are all folded. Yes, because those are the best ones. Those are the best ones. I seek those out and I know I'm not obviously.
Speaker 2:No, they're my, so I will literally go in and pick out the ones. Yeah, that's what I am too.
Speaker 1:That's so funny.
Speaker 2:Let me just run through these so self affirmations. Michelle's. Like I, love the chips.
Speaker 1:I'm self affirming I could have them three times this week.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think it's been kind of fun to put little notes, like you have put a little note on your finger or whatever for the morning and just go okay, you're going to kick ass today or whatever you're going to do Kind of fun self affirmation notes.
Speaker 2:When you don't forgive which is not necessarily about mind over matter in some ways, but in others it kind of is when you have, when you hold or harbor anger or resentment and you don't work through that, it can put you in a really negative place. Yeah, it takes time to work through things and when you do forgive, it's not forgiving for that person or that situation, it's forgiving for yourself really. So you can let your heart be lighter.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly it's like that episode. We did let that shit go.
Speaker 2:That was a long we did that one like at the beginning. Yeah, the other one was exercise, because exercise, even like you're saying, like a 30 minute walk, just something that gets your blood flowing, get your body moving, it is so good for your brain, yeah. It is so good for your to breathe in fresh air. You know well, maybe if you're at the gym you might not be completely fresh air, but you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Yeah, just to get your blood pumping. Yeah, makes a big difference in your outlook on things. A lot of this has to do with your mental outlook. So I I feel like this is a really good topic for us, especially. You know we're early on in the year and the whole concept of mind over matter is going to come into play, with things that we're going to be dealing with that we don't even know about yet. You know it may be adversity will hit us, maybe we'll have some conundrum that we have to try to figure out, and putting our kind of rising above whatever it is it's holding us back might be something that we really have to practice. So I'm hoping that covering this topic has been helpful for our listeners out there, because it's always something that you can benefit from For sure, absolutely. I could be from the 90s and say for shizzle.
Speaker 1:Really quick before we wrap up too. There's different things that you can say because, like you were talking about before, how you handle situations, it, you know, makes a difference. So just even trying to positively say something in regard to a situation, if something's hard, you know, instead of saying, oh my gosh, that's just going to be too hard, try to tell yourself something different, like you know. Let me see if I can figure this out.
Speaker 2:So what's so hard about it? What can we get? What can you do to pass?
Speaker 1:that, yeah, to get past it. So that's just one example. There's many others. But being again aware of those things that come to our mind as we move through different situations, because that will make a difference, our human limitations we've set on ourselves.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's a lot of things that we touched on in this one. I like it, so please remember to download our episode. You can find us out there on all the platforms that you listen to your podcast on and if you download, you can revisit. And, of course, we're on all the socials. We have an email address sublanabranetteandmic at gmailcom. Hit us up there, because we would love your feedback and we want to talk about some of it.
Speaker 2:So most definitely. Thank you so much for tuning in and checking this out on video and or on audio, depending upon what platform you're on. We do appreciate you taking the time to spend with us. So, on that note, until next time.
Speaker 1:Peace out everybody. Have a good one, Bye, Bye.