As the chapel organ's first notes reverberated, we couldn't help but reflect on the countless stories weddings weave into the tapestry of our lives. From the hallowed aisles of tradition to the raucous laughter of Vegas after-parties, we're uncorking tales that capture the heart and chaos of matrimonial revelry. Embrace a rollercoaster ride as we examine the evolution of marriage celebrations, navigating everything from the obligatory soft cast at a reception to the delicate dance of digital gifting.
Ever pondered the weighty price tag of saying 'I do'? Join us as we dissect the hefty financial vows couples make, often overshadowing their love-laden promises. We confess our own non-traditional union's triumphs over societal pressures and discuss how the modern age has seen a shift in who foots the bill. Our conversation stretches from the historic origins of dowries to the present-day quandaries of destination weddings, shining a light on the financial and emotional toll of being both a guest and a gracious host.
Wedding bells chime with a different resonance these days, and our chat delves into the nuances of contemporary ceremonies and receptions. We propose a toast to the beautifully simple, the charmingly quirky, and even the downright unconventional unions, celebrating the unique love stories that don't necessarily fit the cookie-cutter mold. So, whether you're gearing up for your own big day or bracing yourself for a season of others', let's raise our glasses to the power of love, the joy of shared moments, and the laughter that echoes long after the last slice of cake has been devoured.
As the chapel organ's first notes reverberated, we couldn't help but reflect on the countless stories weddings weave into the tapestry of our lives. From the hallowed aisles of tradition to the raucous laughter of Vegas after-parties, we're uncorking tales that capture the heart and chaos of matrimonial revelry. Embrace a rollercoaster ride as we examine the evolution of marriage celebrations, navigating everything from the obligatory soft cast at a reception to the delicate dance of digital gifting.
Ever pondered the weighty price tag of saying 'I do'? Join us as we dissect the hefty financial vows couples make, often overshadowing their love-laden promises. We confess our own non-traditional union's triumphs over societal pressures and discuss how the modern age has seen a shift in who foots the bill. Our conversation stretches from the historic origins of dowries to the present-day quandaries of destination weddings, shining a light on the financial and emotional toll of being both a guest and a gracious host.
Wedding bells chime with a different resonance these days, and our chat delves into the nuances of contemporary ceremonies and receptions. We propose a toast to the beautifully simple, the charmingly quirky, and even the downright unconventional unions, celebrating the unique love stories that don't necessarily fit the cookie-cutter mold. So, whether you're gearing up for your own big day or bracing yourself for a season of others', let's raise our glasses to the power of love, the joy of shared moments, and the laughter that echoes long after the last slice of cake has been devoured.
One, two, three, four.
Speaker 2:It's wedding season.
Speaker 1:Did you walk down the aisle to that tune?
Speaker 2:No, it was a no. No wait, I'm sorry, that's gradually. Yeah, that's gradually.
Speaker 1:I think it's called trumpet and D minor or something.
Speaker 2:So Catholic wedding, very specific on the music and everything that you can use.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So I think it was the wedding march, but it wasn't the dun dun, dun, dun one it was the other one, right?
Speaker 1:I'd like to say I remember, but I was sitting here thinking about it and I don't. You don't remember what you I don't.
Speaker 2:Well, I have to tell you it's when I Well, let's stop for a second here, because we have. I've missed you, Michelle, I know, hey. Yeah, it's been just kind of a weird like last few days. So I have to call out the fact that I'm an Inglid. Yes, and so Michelle had to cut my steak for me.
Speaker 1:But I did not feed her. She didn't feed me, no.
Speaker 2:But Zoe and I went to see a podcast showing and it was at this place down Venue. Downtown was great. Two hot takes is the podcast and Zoe loves it, so anyway, it was really fun. But afterwards we went to go get something to eat and I'm just gabbin' away and catch my toe on the raised sidewalk and went flying and my leg is still really bruised.
Speaker 1:This is the story she's telling anyways. What other story would there be? A couple of vodka's later, please, please, I'm just kidding. I think I had a seltzer. I think I had one seltzer. There really was a tree root, though.
Speaker 2:There really was. And yeah, so I didn't really realize what was going on until the next day I went to the doctor and it was cracked in a couple places so lovely. And then Eileen Michelle stayed home and Eileen and I went to Vegas.
Speaker 1:Yes, you did.
Speaker 2:And got to see Joe to see we had so much fun. She was living vicariously through us, through our Instagram stories. I was, yeah, because we were causing trouble, although it was like sweet, sweet, quick in and out. We were there. We got there at midnight because our flight was delayed and then didn't get to our room until like two in the morning. Yeah, and then the next day just leisurely, casual, had a massage, of course, I went to the gym and got all dressed, had our little we just had the best time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was so fun. Those two looked so hot. They went to the Joe to see concert and, oh my goodness, I'm sure they had heads turning because I kept looking at the pictures going. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, eileen, she makes everything look all pretty. And I'm laughing because I had a lot of people commenting on oh my gosh, I love your dress. I'm like this is the same dress. I wear a tennis shoes I just happened to be wearing it with heels this time.
Speaker 1:And a soft cast. Yeah, and a soft. Well, I had to have something covered in cast.
Speaker 2:I couldn't even see the cast. I know Because you know, my shirt was black.
Speaker 1:It's all blended yeah.
Speaker 2:Anyway, so we're back to reality and, as we know, it is wedding season, so we started talking about that, but I thought it would be really important for you all to catch up on us and our show, and we're going to have to do a lot of good things about the thing we love to do. We're going to do the same thing.
Speaker 2:We're going to do the same thing and that's just kind of you know the same thing, so we're going to have to do the same thing. And you know we're going to have to do the same thing, so we're going to have to do the same thing. And this is going to be a really fun and emotional thing for us and our lives, because, why not? And on another note, while I was gone, michelle watched the puppies. I did, and the the one, oh my gosh, he has a chewing problem. He's got anxiety. How do I end up with a?
Speaker 1:dog with things I do not.
Speaker 2:No, I do not, I just let him one of those thunder vests and he's wearing that today. Not happy, Not happy about the thunder vest at all. But anyway, he has training next week, so hopefully he won't chew up any more couches.
Speaker 1:He literally chewed the end, the armrest, the armrest of the couch. At the end of it there's a giant hole. He took the stuffing out, he took the foamy stuff out.
Speaker 2:I was- and then he just looks at you like and of course it was under my watch.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like she thought I was going to be really upset and I'm like you know he's already, I know he's already done that it's not the first one, but I know still.
Speaker 2:So the days are over that I just get the little shawawa who wants to cuddle and sleep.
Speaker 1:He's not that dog, that is for sure.
Speaker 2:He's my dog, so I will figure it out. Yeah, okay, maybe we should marry him off.
Speaker 2:So we thought a wedding season. You know it is wedding season right now and we both have kids that are in that, either been married or at that age where they're probably going to contemplate it sometime soon, maybe. But what I found, michelle, is that I think that generations today don't even look at it the same way as we did. Oh, I'm sure I mean it was a big deal, although one of my favorite shows is Say yes to the Dress. Don't ask me why I've never watched it. It's a reality show yeah.
Speaker 1:Everybody holds the signs now when they get their dress. Yeah, I said yes to the dress. Yes, that's where it's coming from.
Speaker 2:I just love seeing the brides and seeing little gowns and what they pay. I just love that.
Speaker 1:I don't know why, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Probably because I did it once myself, but I don't know that people are really doing it in the same way that they did before because weddings are so cost prohibitive these days. Right, I mean to do it correctly, or to do it the way they view it to be correctly, or how you grew up as a princess and thought you were going to have a wedding.
Speaker 1:I feel like it's either one or the other. It's either that extravagant outlandish wedding, or it's pretty moderate, and or it's a destination Mm-hmm, I don't know.
Speaker 2:There's just If you were to do it all over again, what would you choose?
Speaker 1:Like, okay, that could be two, a few different things. So if I was to do it all over again, like when I did it in 1987, if I was to do it all over again.
Speaker 2:No, now, If you were to do it all over again In your life. Now we look at it differently, obviously.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2:So what would you do If I?
Speaker 1:was to get married again, I would have my family like literally my sons, my best friends and that's pretty much it. I wouldn't even do a family Like. When I say family, I mean my sons and my grandkids, maybe Not my siblings.
Speaker 2:Really Not even your siblings. No, I guess you have a big family, I mean, but why Did you have when you got married? Was it a big to-do? No, I mean, did you have like a lot of people?
Speaker 1:No, it was pretty. I was pregnant when I got married.
Speaker 2:Oh that's right, you couldn't see the baby yet, so it was planned fast and Fast and furious.
Speaker 1:And yeah, no, there was only yeah, it was not that big, it was in a Mormon church and I literally planned. I did everything, okay, and my mom, my parents, helped me, of course, but I mean, when I say everything is like I ordered and paid for the cake, I ordered and paid for the invitations. You know, my mom made my dress, she made my bridesmaid's dresses, we had cake, punch and nuts.
Speaker 1:Really, we came in at the reception and it was just right there in the same building, you know, at the Mormon church. It was like the ceremony. And then we filed into the cultural hall where it was decorated. Was there dancing and stuff With streamers and not even getting pink and white, I think, streamers. There were some flowers. No, there was just one long table for the cake. There was no food. Like I said, nuts cake punch, and that's really it. Banana bread maybe, I think Maybe some banana bread.
Speaker 2:So no dancing.
Speaker 1:No dancing, it was just social. Take pictures, eat cake and you're married. We're married. And that was it. Yeah, pretty simple. Yeah, I mean, that works yeah.
Speaker 2:All days. That would work too.
Speaker 1:I didn't. Like I said when I got my, it wasn't this like joyous occasion that everybody was celebrating Like I had to get. We had made it.
Speaker 2:It wasn't joyous occasion.
Speaker 1:But I mean, like it had to be done quickly. It had to be done quickly. I was expecting a child. I didn't make that known, you know, and so I think people were wondering why. I mean, like they probably had their ideas that what was going on, but didn't really say anything, you know. And so, yeah, that's just kind of how that went down. And I, you know, my mom, took me fabric shopping for, you know, the dress, and I thought I'm going to tell her when we're shopping. And I couldn't bring myself to tell her, you know. So it was, there was just a lot of Was there a shotgun involved?
Speaker 1:Yeah, no shotgun.
Speaker 2:So I did the full on traditional thing with the bridesmaids and the groomsmen and hour long Catholic ceremony in mid June with no air conditioning and it was hot. Wow, those are the things you remember. Yeah, and my dad stepped on my veil, the train of my veil, and when we were walking. So that's all on video.
Speaker 1:Oh, no, really.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then had a big reception. I think there's maybe 150 people or so I don't remember exactly, but I was kind of a tiny bit brightzilla towards the end. I think yeah, Because it was so stressful. Yeah, to me it seemed kind of stressful and I was so over the top about every single thing matching perfectly and just really. Oh my gosh yeah. The teal it was teal the color.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And the ribbon had to match the dresses, so I'm literally taking a swatch of the fabric to the store to match it to the ribbon.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I was that person, yeah that was me. So To do it all over again, like to do it again? First of all, I'm not gonna do that again, I will not get married again. But I know you say really dilly bit, no, I probably won't. But let's just say hypothetically I did, yeah, totally would not do the same thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my family, my close friends, yeah, and probably maybe a destination somewhere warm, mm-hmm, I would think or just something really intimate here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I would say intimate. I I probably would not do a destination.
Speaker 2:It would be something intimate Some more so, keeping all of that in mind as we go into what the Family responsibilities are, the things we're talking about are very traditional, and so the the hope is in. My hope is that so a lot of our listeners are People that are in that age where they have children, that are gonna be thinking about getting married and and maybe, if they have a daughter God forbid it's like it's gonna be that fairy tale thought process in that daughter's head.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, it's always not that fairy tale girl she would. She would sooner die than be the center of attention. So I kind of lucked out.
Speaker 1:I mean I kind of lucked out because I have four boys, yeah, and and there's stuff they're responsible for financially but, nothing.
Speaker 2:But, but I think a lot of that has to do with with All the socioeconomics you know when you, when you're talking about Families marrying into other families, or you know a woman and a man, or a man and a man, or woman and woman Whatever marrying into each other's families, some families might have a lot of money and some families might not have any right, and so I know that the Tradition and what people talk about being the traditional expenses don't always apply in the same way, right like I've always known that the, the rehearsal dinners usually handled by the groom's family, right and then out of town guests should be invited always, but sometimes they haven't been because About this than I do, because mine, your wedding, like you said, was traditional.
Speaker 1:It was a long-ass time ago.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't think I just changed.
Speaker 1:Really, as far as the traditions go and some of the things that you were just saying. My wedding was Not traditional. Like you know, I had yeah, I just didn't have to worry about any of that stuff Because we didn't you know, we, there was no rehearsal dinner, there was no. Yeah, we didn't do any of that stuff. Literally, like I got a cake, invitations out, invited friends, family, there was maybe 50 people there Maybe that's pushing it, okay, and you know, there there was no like, yeah, any of that stuff. So I, it's kind of, it was kind of interesting reading this stuff. I've watched my siblings get married, so I kind of had an idea Watching that all go down, because I was young, you know, and and seeing what went on there. But there's and and I think too it depends on to your point like what kind of wedding is wanted? Mm-hmm, and yes, if parties can afford to take care, maybe one can, one can't. So it then becomes probably somewhat of a group effort, or I think people Unfortunately go into mad debt yes, doing these things.
Speaker 2:Well, and then there's the other, unfortunate- it's kind of like Christmas, you know, when you put everything on your credit card.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's unfortunate yeah and the responsibility.
Speaker 2:So, when you look at, people today aren't even really, at least in this part of the country Maybe other parts of the country it's different but they're not getting married when they're 21, 22 years old. Right, we're not getting married 18. Yeah, you would see that a lot you know back in the earlier part of the century, last century, or even going back further than that. But yeah, nowadays People are waiting until their 30s, or they're waiting until even their late 30s to get married, and so they have established jobs. Yeah, they're making money.
Speaker 2:And so the tide kind of turns, because should they be responsible for more of the Financial aspects of their wedding if they want to plan some big, you know? Yeah, yeah and so I think it really is dependent on the relationship that those people have with their families.
Speaker 2:Yeah parents, and what kind of money, frankly, that those parents are willing to spend? For sure, because I, I would say, I mean, I would give mine the option and say so do you want me to help you pay for a wedding, or would you rather have money towards a down payment on a house?
Speaker 1:I just had this conversation with somebody, literally like three days ago. Really they were telling me this story and they knew somebody who the dads offered that and said offered $50,000 to the wedding of your dreams or Help with getting into a house, but he said I am not gonna do both. So and his daughter it was she when she picked the dream wedding. She did.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow, see now, I would have said.
Speaker 1:And they filed for divorce. Oh, less than a year later.
Speaker 2:I wonder if he's the maker paying back.
Speaker 1:Dollars. Oh, my goodness right. I mean yeah, so and and I guess I Don't know what someone would pick, and it well, I mean so I was.
Speaker 2:So here I am like trying to negotiate in my mind yeah, my dad would never, never would have done that. I mean, he was very gracious and paid for the bulk, I think, of my wedding, mm-hmm, but there's no way in hell he would have done a $50,000 wedding. But let's say hypothetically, yeah, I said, julie, you've got 50 grand, you can spend it on your wedding or you can spend it on the down payment for your house. I would say how about, if I spend 10,000 on my wedding, 15,000 or whatever on my wedding and I use the rest for the down payment on my house.
Speaker 2:So I think that's a good. You know, I mean, it's something that you shouldn't even necessarily expect, but I think there's a lot of assumptions being made by kids growing up that their parents are going to do those things for them, when they may not have the same belief system. Or if the parents didn't have that themselves, they don't know why it's such a big deal for someone else to do it Right.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, let's get into this a little bit, like what the responsibilities are, or these are traditional responsibilities, traditional responsibilities and for traditionally that word is probably going to get thrown a lot today out there but traditionally the brides family is responsible for most costs that are associated with the wedding. That's why I say when I said, thank goodness I have four boys, because that's typically what you see as the brides family paying for the bulk of so many things, from invitations, cake, you know, to like accommodations for bridesmaids if they are coming from somewhere. You know different things like that, but even the venue, the brides family is the brides family is on the hook for a lot.
Speaker 1:Is on the hook for a lot and when I was looking at that and thinking about those things, I imagine again traditionally it's because the man is taking this woman traditionally and he's going to care for her and take care of her for the rest of their lives.
Speaker 2:Right. So isn't that where kind of a dowry comes in like back in way back in the day?
Speaker 2:they were like even, you know, like 1800s, even 17 years. I think it might have been more for wealthier families, but there was a dowry that had to be provided to the groom for taking on this woman. And so they would. You know, we're talking like old country, like you could have two goats and a cow. That's all my daughter's worth to go to the cow, and if that's all they could afford, right? Yeah, you know. Or some big, big bulk of money. Yeah, they're giving some bulk of money, kind of like okay, here's the way I picture it's like here's your burden, I'm going to give you money to offset your burden. That's how it comes across.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And I think that's how it was, because women were really like chattel, they were like property, so kind of moving forward. A lot of these traditional things that we're talking about they come from that era, yeah, and they're not exactly the same now. Obviously they're have evolved, hopefully, over time, have evolved to where they're not the same, but that's where they, that's where they originate from.
Speaker 1:Yeah, which is kind of makes me laugh, yeah.
Speaker 2:Who gives this woman to this man and her mother? And I do you know, and it's like you're going to give me away, I don't know when you think about it. It's funny Financially and all the things to hit her. Woo. I mean, had Brian known, he probably would have asked for something. Well, after what he was buying into, you know that's funny. Yeah, okay, yeah. So engagement party. Do you think there should be an engagement party? I was thinking about that going. What is what is engagement party? What it?
Speaker 1:I suppose it depends on what an engagement party is. What is an engagement party? Where it could be? There's probably a lot of different takes on that as well, yeah. I mean an engagement party could be, whatever it is that happens when the question gets popped, when they pop the question, you know. So if there's something planned around that, and then there's a party after, who knows, or if, when a couple gets engaged, yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Well, you're right, there's a lot of different variations from formal dinners to formal gatherings. To hey, let's go meet at the pub down the street and celebrate. It's just more of an acknowledgement. I don't know. I don't know that it's something that's necessary to do. I think you'll put out engagement announcements, like with save the date announcements and things like that. You see those things coming out.
Speaker 1:Cause everybody's so busy now we have to do save the dates. Yeah, in a year in advance. Yeah, yeah, pretty much I know. Well, that's the thing.
Speaker 2:It's like I've got like Haley Mary's daughter and Michael she's doing.
Speaker 2:She's doing a little like she did the invitations herself. They're so cute and she's these really cool pictures and stuff. Their wedding is a totally different dynamic. I mean, I think the ceremony and stuff will be similar, but it's like a, it's like a weekend. I feel like we're going to Woodstock. Oh, really, yeah, woodstock. Mary's family knows how to put on a good party, hello. So it's probably going to be something like that, but she's doing it a lot of it herself, and I'm sure you know the costs are going to get absorbed by Mary and Andy and so it's kind of a destination.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's here in Washington, but it's an overnight, really, it's kind of an overnight destination and it's a whole weekend. Yeah, and so for their request, yeah, for their request. Instead of gifts, they are asking for people to contribute their time to help with cause. It's like a campsite or something. It's very different. This is very Haley.
Speaker 1:You have no Haley to know.
Speaker 2:But anyway very non-traditional type of wedding and events that are taking place with it and stuff. So it's going to be really fun, I think, to kind of see, cause you don't I'm not going to nearly know it to expect.
Speaker 1:There are so many different like. There's so weddings just as we're talking about it and listening to you talk about that and thinking about mine and listening to yours. There's just so many different dynamics on it. It's a very interesting party that gets planned.
Speaker 2:I mean, it really is a party, it's a total celebration.
Speaker 1:So my sister, my sister, she was married and then they divorced and then they got married again. They got married a second time around and it was kind of they, they. So the first time they got married it was very small, intimate, it was not a big to do. But when they got married the second time it was it was a bigger to do. Oh yeah, it was on Rosario Resort up on whatever island and it was outdoors. It was beautiful.
Speaker 1:They had the invitations were around the theme of Hollywood you know, and they had the take to like take to was part of it, because they were getting married for the second time.
Speaker 2:So yeah, they really really know the second time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, they divorced again. Oh, they did.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, it's all good.
Speaker 1:But no, when I think about, yeah, just like the, the, the things and the ideas and the way people plan and what they want and what it means and that's why it's interesting, yeah, when you say, what would you do now? Yeah, I think it would just be smaller because I think it would be more meaningful, and not more meaningful than the first time, but it just as a mature you know, grown up- now.
Speaker 1:Cause. Anyways, there's like so many stories and I'm sure there will be more as we go along here, but along with you know, some of those costs for the Brides family engagement party to your point, whatever that is, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:The wedding dress, and that is a budget, probably.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, that's a budget and it's a see there, there you go. That is something where you see you know women spending $5,000, $10,000 on a gown yeah, they're going to wear one time, yeah, and I just have a hard time with that.
Speaker 2:It just doesn't seem very practical, but at the same time, you get caught up in the moment and these beautiful gowns, you know, like I said, I watch. Say yes to the dress. Yeah, it's a you know, you, it's there. It's like a thing girls have from when they were little. Yeah, and they have this, this vision of it being this princess moment you know when they see themselves in this dress and none of that stuff really matters, yeah.
Speaker 2:So I think a budget's good, but you have to take the emotion out of it a little bit to stay within, you know your budget what Mine costs $250 to make Nice. And then your mom, so I don't remember how much mine was. It was gorgeous though.
Speaker 1:It was so pretty, yeah.
Speaker 2:And then, of course, I did the whole, you know, steaming it, putting it in the box and doing it. Why I did that, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know, you never know, yeah. So I would think, on weddings that are for maybe more fluent weddings, or ones that are requiring a lot of moving parts to it, you might have a wedding planner, and that would be something more than likely that a parent would pay for. Or again, when you're looking at older individuals who are getting married, I really don't think parents should have to pay for any of that stuff.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:I mean I would contribute, obviously as a parent. But I don't think, I just think that there's a and it's some nice and assumption, but there's it's an entitlement almost sometimes I think people feel like their folks are supposed to have to pay for those things and I'm I mean I will pay for whatever I. I can leave that. I don't think it's reasonable necessarily to Expect your parents to pay for a ten thousand dollar dress or a five thousand dollar dress. You know, that's just money that could be used for something else.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's just me though, yeah so Photography and videography those are probably two of the most critical pieces, I think, and you have to find a good photographer and a videographer. My videographer put the video behind one of these beautiful arrangements of flowers by accident, and so Once the ceremony started, the camera was behind Flowers. You couldn't see anything, and so I think she figured it out and moved it, but it was like yeah, I think there's always a story, too, that that, like you just told, it seems like there's always a story, I think.
Speaker 1:I think it was Rick's wedding ring that didn't fit him.
Speaker 2:Oh really when we got married.
Speaker 1:It was that my brother made them. I just think it was. Yeah, it needed to be a bigger and by the time when we got married, again, it was quick. Yeah, it was a quick wedding, yeah, so, but yeah, there's. I feel like there's always something, something going on that happens at weddings.
Speaker 2:Transportation venue. The reception, all the food for the reception so the caterer? The cake and then, of course, there's a morning after brunch. That's usually for the wedding party and that's what a lot of the gifts are opened. Yeah, you know a couple will. If they're there, they might be leaving to go on a honeymoon right, you know, that's a whole nother cost.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the honeymoon, which a groom by tradition. Yeah, is the groom, the pace for the honeymoon and pace for his, his bride's ring and, I think, gifts for his groomsmen and the bride has gifts for her bridesmaids. Yeah, all those things I think established and stay pretty much the same. Yeah, so here's the thing.
Speaker 2:I you know I'm Andrew my oldest he is of that age where all of his friends are getting married, and when I say all I mean it's like he has a pretty big friend circle, from his fraternity mostly. And there's one other guy that he was really close with in high school and I think he had seven weddings this past year or this past year, and no, I think there's another one coming up here in the the fall, and, and there were destinations. Oh, no, I, there's another one coming up in May, and I think there's another one coming up in the fall. The May one is a destination wedding and the fall one is also a destination wedding, and so and I think Andrew's the best man, one of them, I can't remember which one, but anyway, they have to figure out. It's like not only are there the wedding gifts, but there's the wedding travel, the accommodations, for yeah, if it's a destination clothing the gifts, the bridal shower, the bachelor at party, the I mean, there's just so much stuff, and yeah.
Speaker 2:I think it becomes really cost prohibitive for people to want to. Well, they want to be involved, but they don't necessarily always know that they can be involved because it's cost prohibitive. So Zoe was invited to be in a wedding for a friend of hers and the woman that had invited her to be in the wedding had planned it in Philadelphia and it was supposed to be this past year in September. And you know, she's starting a new job and she doesn't have a lot of time Off of work. She's got to pay for a hotel, she's got to pay for her dress, she's got to pay for her airfare, she's got the gift she's, I mean, and then probably bring her own significant other and it was a. She was just really Struggling with this because she really wanted to be involved, but it was. It was a lot of money for her to spend, you know, and I said you know she's gonna understand.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not something that you really can do, you know. Just send her a nice gift, be able to help her with whatever you could help her friend from a distance.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's not, and she was totally cool.
Speaker 2:Her friend was completely cool with it. Yeah, but I'm sure that you run into that a lot, you know, especially if you've moved and you're having the wedding in a different area and see, I, I guess I was in my best friend's wedding at the time and it was the first time I'd been in a wedding.
Speaker 1:I was, like you know, 18 or 19 years old 19 years old and they lived in California and she wanted me to be her maid of honor.
Speaker 1:So I went. I didn't know any of these things, because as we're sitting here talking, I am thinking about how I used to watch my mom and she did my oldest sister. She made all all the bridesmaids dresses. She made them all for Becky's Karnit, like a lot of the weddings. She made all the dresses and so I didn't really know, you know, if there was gonna be a dress, if we were what she wanted me to wear.
Speaker 1:What should we? Yeah, I didn't, I didn't know, and I think there's a lot of people nowadays that are much more schooled on that. Back in the day, I didn't, I didn't know, but yeah, I had to buy my dress, I bought the plane ticket to go to California and it was. It was a learning, definitely learning experience for me so yeah, and it's.
Speaker 2:It's unfortunate that some people can't participate, because yeah. I mean, I think, if it's your best friend, obviously you figure out a way and your best friend knows your circumstances Sure so we'll think about that maybe when they're planning. But if you've got a bunch of friends who can't afford to travel to a destination wedding, then be prepared to be at that wedding.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know yeah.
Speaker 2:I guess that's the one thing that and most people don't really care. I mean, like when Mary got married the second time, it was just her children and these children and they went to Hawaii, all of them together, for a week and they had the best time. They had a big house and everything. So it wasn't like the traditional wedding where, you know, they were off on a honeymoon. They were. It was more important to them to spend time with their families or their kids, you know they were there yeah which I completely sure think that's the best way to do it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, do that, yeah, so anyway.
Speaker 2:So what about the groom's family? What are?
Speaker 1:they typically responsible for the groom's family, traditionally the honeymoon. Like you already mentioned, they, if there's a fee for the, the officiator, mm-hmm, they're responsible for that. The marriage license, of course. Nowadays you can pretty much have anybody marry you. Yeah, I send it that, oh yeah yeah he married his wife's sister. Okay when that her husband they got married. He officiated the wedding. So yeah, anyways. But if there's a fee, the groom's family typical is gonna be responsible for that rehearsal dinner, like you.
Speaker 2:Mentioned, which usually is kind of a little bit of a shindig of some sort you know, because that's their Contribution, if you will. The whole officiant thing I had no idea about the etiquette on any of that either. Like we had a priest and the priest was the same priest for my high school. It's really like very special.
Speaker 1:Is there a fee? Do they get paid?
Speaker 2:No, that was my point. I don't. I mean, I didn't know that and I didn't even really know what to ask or who to talk to about it, or if there even was one. I mean, I'd never paid a priest before, but now I look back on it, it was like I I did not know what the etiquette was, and I think we got, we got him a gift and maybe got him a gift card or something. I don't remember, but it wasn't anything, probably like it was supposed to be.
Speaker 2:Yeah of course he was very gracious and everything. But you know you've got these young kids getting married and I didn't bother to even ask my mom.
Speaker 1:I just didn't know. Brides bouquet I didn't realize, but like flowers, the boutonniers, the corsage, you know if there's boutonniers, corsages and the bride's bouquet, that seems very detailed to me in a way that doesn't seem.
Speaker 2:That seems kind of like too much detail. I'm like if you're getting the flowers for the venue and you're getting the flowers for, why won't you just get all of it?
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's what I would probably do. I think that's what we did yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, ordered everything at one time, yeah, so yeah, flowers, transportation, accommodations. If there is like a DJ, yep or a band, one party, other one is alcohol, alcohol, yeah, that alcohol is always a fun one.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, yeah open bar, beer and wine.
Speaker 2:I came on, plugged here it yeah. Well, is it beer and wine, or is it an open bar with a Tito's and soda, tito's and tonic or whatever? Yeah, because I mean I know I've seen people that have been at open bars and then they're and they're like well, if it's an open bar, I'll get back, and you know you know, something really expensive.
Speaker 2:So, anyway, you have to kind of be prepared for that, I think, when you're going into a wedding and what the reception and what all those things are gonna look like. So I would love to talk a little bit about the wedding etiquette, though I think this is what's kind of important, not so much, I. So going back into the In 2024, the traditional ways of paying for a wedding and what a wedding looks like are very different.
Speaker 1:Well, and Sienna, I don't know traditionally, like back in the day, because there's a lot of things, too, that bridesmaids are responsible for and the groomsmen are responsible for, like to your point, there's bachelorette parties and so their own dresses.
Speaker 2:there's like a destination dictated at the time of the when someone's asked to be in the wedding, because I would say, yeah, if you would want to do something like that, then you would have to kind of share what the responsibilities are with the bridal party. No strippers no strippers. Yeah for the bachelorette party but you know that you'll be responsible for your dress and your shoes, or you know, I have some special jewelry that I was going to have or I just I can't, honestly I can't even fathom having to plan something like that Really.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can't write my brain around it, maybe plan. I don't know.
Speaker 2:But I think simple and classy is just.
Speaker 1:I don't know kind of the way to go.
Speaker 2:Yeah, a friend of mine, melissa. Her daughter got married this past summer and they had a darling very traditional, but it was outside. So, it was. It was officiated by someone who was not. It wasn't a religious entity, I don't think he wasn't a priest or anything, maybe a pastor. And then they had the reception inside this big venue and they each had, I don't know, five bridesmaids, five grooms, but it was very, very traditional.
Speaker 1:One of my sons when he got married. They got married right here in Edmunds on the beach and Nicole she's ordained, she's ordained she married them.
Speaker 2:Nicole is a friend of Michelle's and mine too, but she knows Michelle better than she knows me, and she is a massage therapist and a reiki master, reiki Mesta.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and she's ordained, and she's ordained. She married my son and his wife. Yeah, it was the best night it was. Yeah, that was fun. We danced on the beach. There was yeah there was, it was. It was a good night, yeah.
Speaker 2:So that's all that you need to remember, I know.
Speaker 1:And it didn't cost like thousands and thousands of dollars and it was so memorable and just like close family and, and, like I said, all, all my kids were there. We danced on the beach. There was this guy just randomly playing like he was playing music on the beach, yeah, and so then we were dancing to him playing and yeah, it was, it was a good night, yeah.
Speaker 2:That's.
Speaker 1:That's what I that's kind of what I envisioned being kind of perfect yeah.
Speaker 2:So so what do you think in terms of the etiquette?
Speaker 1:Can I bring my kids?
Speaker 2:I don't know, can you? That's that is that's one of them I have heard. And again, was you know, being married to someone who was from the Midwest? That was, I remember, a topic of conversation for different events over the course of time and he took a kind of an offense to the fact that kids wouldn't be invited. Oh yeah, because where he grew up it was a big reception big party.
Speaker 1:All the kids were there yeah, All the kids, families, everybody.
Speaker 2:Yeah, whereas if you're having a night wedding, you know like I remember, angie, friend of mine, my sister's friend, had her wedding on New Year's Eve and there were no kids at that wedding.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:There, there weren't going to be any children at that wedding. That was a very much a grown up affair. It was very more formal, I would say.
Speaker 1:There's. There's always that one family. So if you don't want kids at your wedding or reception, it needs it. Pretty much will be stated on the invitation.
Speaker 2:It should be stated on the invitation.
Speaker 1:It should be that, whether children, if it doesn't say anything, it's not going to be a wedding and you're not sure if you should bring them. I would say err on the side of caution and just check. Well, I think also when you think about headcount for wedding.
Speaker 2:you're planning food and all of this. If you receive an invitation and it says Michelle Grayson, not Michelle Grayson and guest, then Michelle Grayson is the only one that's invited. That's, that's exactly right. Yeah, You're coming. You're coming on your own, You're coming solo.
Speaker 2:And I and I think that the RSVP is really important because, again, people are planning, yeah, budgeting all that stuff. Yeah, I find a lot of people hold those invitations until they kind of figure out what they're doing, because typically a wedding invitation will go out six weeks prior to the wedding. That's what the norm is anyway. Giving people enough time to RSVP so you can get you know your seating set. But if they don't RSVP that by that certain date some people don't RSVP and they just show up- so that was very bad form.
Speaker 1:I was reading some of this etiquette stuff and really bad form If you don't RSVP or if you're past the.
Speaker 2:RSVP time to RSVP or if you try to change it from no to a yes, yeah, no, we're not doing that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you just know, we're not doing that Basically you say you're going, then you need to be there. Yeah, you need to show up Some of the other little etiquette, etiquette tricks or etiquette things that we were we were looking at. One of them involved alcohol, and when you're at the reception, it's like really being mindful of not over drinking. I mean, you hear all these stories, right, there's even movies about it where people drink too much and it turns into some big fiasco. You know that sort of thing.
Speaker 1:So wait, there's a family, yeah, Somebody. I won't go in too much detail, but yeah, somebody was dancing on the tables by the end of the.
Speaker 2:Oh goodness.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they are on the tables. Yeah, that sounds like a fun family. It was actually. Yeah, the brag was not thrilled, but it's all good. The brag was not thrilled.
Speaker 2:I wouldn't, yeah, I might not have been thrilled either.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 2:Also there's typically a dress code yeah, Stick to the dress code. Yeah, and again you can. I mean, there's people that don't have a suit, that don't own a suit, yeah, and so they come in khakis at a you know a T-shirt or khakis excuse me, a polo shirt and maybe that's all they have, and if you're at a formal event, then you need to be wearing a suit and tie.
Speaker 2:And women typically, there's so many different cocktail dresses and event dresses and things that you can wear. It's bad for them to wear white to a wedding.
Speaker 2:And you know the whole white thing is going back to the bride being so pure. And then there's the question of should she even be wearing white? I mean, how many Virgin brides do you even know these days? There's probably not very many out there, Right? So someone getting married three or four times and they're still wearing the white dress? Maybe they just wear a cream dress. I don't know, but that goes back to another component of etiquette being that you know you don't talk shit about it.
Speaker 1:Exactly, that's it. That's very true. It's like you don't have to like what they're doing or think it could be done a different way or a better way, or it should have done this and should have done this, or that could have been terrible, or they didn't have enough food for people and blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 2:So those are all things you don't. You kind of keep your mouth shut. Keep your mouth shut About those sorts of things. We talked about the RSVPs and I keep having to lick my finger. Who does that? Since COVID I don't do that anymore.
Speaker 1:There's a whole thing around taking pictures now too, yeah, and I think that's what I mean. I think, because of social media and everybody has a camera on them with their phone, there was some really interesting outlays for picture taking etiquette. So obviously, the wedding party has hired a professional photographer and they have a plan and they know what they're doing. So you really shouldn't try and you just need to stay out of the way.
Speaker 2:And posting, like posting things about a person's wedding or if you're at a wedding or what have you, but they haven't posted anything. I wouldn't do that either. Because you don't know if they don't want to have a social media presence or they've had to really limit their guest list. They don't want to hurt people's feelings. I think that's really important to know. A lot of times people will put little disposable cameras on the table.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I like that and ask them to take pictures of their table and the people there and those are kind of fun, I bet, to get developed because the old school way and see what pictures are provided, but there's probably a lot of them that don't even come out, so that person who's doing the video and doing the photography is really, really important to capture the day. That way. What about gift giving? What are your thoughts on gift giving?
Speaker 1:Well, typically there's a registry and I think it's if you're going to be thoughtful in giving a gift, I would say taking a look at that registry is kind of important. That way you can know and you can't really miss if you use a registry?
Speaker 2:Yeah, One thing that, when I was doing my research, that read was first of all, the gift is for the couple, it's not for your person. So if you, it's your person, that you know that's getting married, but you don't know their spouse, the gift is for both of them, it's not for just one.
Speaker 1:Well, and that just prompted another thought. There's the bridal shower. There's bridal showers, typically before, where you can do that, you know, but I had four. It's another aspect of the.
Speaker 2:What bridal?
Speaker 1:shower Geez. I know Well, there was the family one another family one, there was a work one, the church one there was a friend one, yeah, and a couple of them, if I remember, had themes.
Speaker 2:You know they had like a wander, a theme was one of them.
Speaker 1:That kind of thing.
Speaker 2:But in terms of gift giving, I think that you're right. The registry is good Now. It was really bad form before. When I say before in you know, back.
Speaker 1:It keeps it back in the day, back in the day, I know that bad form.
Speaker 2:When it stopped, I don't know but to give money and a lot of people like to just give money because you know. You know they're going to need money Right Now. It's not inappropriate to do that at all and in fact on the registry, a lot of the time the couples will ask for if there's a gift giving, they're asking for the gift to be money towards their honeymoon.
Speaker 1:For example yeah, that reminds me. Have you ever been to a reception where they do the dancing, they dance you like line up and you pay to dance with the bride? They did that. Or you pay to dance with the groom.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, really it was weird. I thought it was weird Really. Yeah, it was just felt weird.
Speaker 1:Oh, I've been, I've I've see. I went to one and I was like, oh, this is such a great idea. I mean, it was like I dance a lot.
Speaker 2:They didn't do it with Brian, they just did it with me, uh-huh.
Speaker 1:You can like pay to dance with Julie, kind of a thing.
Speaker 2:I just felt weird, I don't know I didn't like it, but that is, or they have a money tree.
Speaker 1:Money tree and nowadays they have QR codes. Yeah, oh my gosh, yeah, I've seen. I've seen.
Speaker 2:QR codes. Go ahead and donate through Venmo. Uh-huh, seriously, yeah, I mean it's yeah.
Speaker 1:That's how a lot of um, uh. Recently, when one of Rick's daughters graduated the high school. You know, the the cards with the money is kind of a lost. It's kind of a lost thing and because people are just cash out Venmo, you know.
Speaker 2:It just doesn't have the same meaning. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I mean I could see I agree, but yeah, it's so convenient and it's I mean, but who gives?
Speaker 2:who even has checks anymore.
Speaker 1:It's not checks, no, I mean like no, like you know, wedding.
Speaker 2:They have a basket a lot of the time where you can put all the cards and people put it on.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, I have checks.
Speaker 2:Michelle has checks.
Speaker 1:I have checks, but I don't very only when people need them, I do cash. Like if I'm going to send somebody money, I send cold, hard cash.
Speaker 2:Really.
Speaker 1:Okay, yep In the mail. Yep, probably not safe, but I do it.
Speaker 2:So destination weddings you probably don't want to be bringing gifts, right, you know, maybe send them to their house. Yeah, in advance of going yeah, and then you know, do something that's a cash donation or something like that to contribute to their honeymoon or or whatever it is what?
Speaker 1:about making an announcement of some kind at somebody else's wedding or reception. Bad, bad, bad, bad. Bad form, like that we're having a baby or that we're engaged, or by the way, everybody. Yeah, since we're all here.
Speaker 2:Yeah, feeling the thunder.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that particular. No, that's not good that would be awful.
Speaker 2:Yeah, really bad. Maybe that was siblings, you know, trying to one up each other.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, yeah, that's not good yeah.
Speaker 2:Save any of that kind of stuff for later. It's not for the time when these people are highlighted.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, everything that they're doing and turn your phone off.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Well in the ceremony too.
Speaker 2:That's what.
Speaker 1:I mean Turn your phone off, Like you know when you're there for the ceremony, and so you can pay attention, not be distracted.
Speaker 2:You shouldn't be taking pictures.
Speaker 1:There should be no pictures, Exactly so you know we're doing that, yeah, yeah, the announcements are kind of big.
Speaker 2:We talked about talking ill of you know. Not like people are going to be out there gossiping and talking ill of the bride God forbid. It's like you're at, you're being invited to the wedding.
Speaker 1:You're talking shit about the wedding, that's so not cool, but I think it happens, you know because people are comparing it to their own, or what have you.
Speaker 2:So you just really have to be gracious about if it's not something that you agree with or say that you don't agree with the union. Yeah, you don't like the person your friend is married.
Speaker 1:Speak now or forever.
Speaker 2:hold your peace or now we have yeah or same sex weddings. It's like if you're not in line with same sex marriage and you're going to be a jerk about it don't go, don't go yeah. I mean, it's like I would rather, if it was me, I would rather not happen there.
Speaker 1:You would think they wouldn't be invited anyways To begin with. Well, they'd be family, yeah.
Speaker 2:And what if it's your parents and you're hoping they come, but maybe they choose not to because they don't agree with your choices, your life choices or something that's tragic?
Speaker 1:if something like that happens? Yeah, what if it does happen? I think my friend unfortunately had to deal with that. Really, yeah, it was tough.
Speaker 2:Well, I don't know. I think we see more and more of that now, or they'll have commitment ceremonies and maybe not wedding ceremonies. But you know, same sex wedding ceremonies, I think, are in the bulk of the States now. Yeah, and it's really not an abnormal thing. I mean, we could get into a lot of controversy around who's going to make their wedding cake, you know you've seen those things?
Speaker 2:There was a lawsuit, did you see that? No, I was telling you a year ago, maybe two years ago, where this baker did not want to make the wedding cake for a same sex couple.
Speaker 1:Maybe I did hear about this Because it went against your religious values.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a cake.
Speaker 2:Well, and this is your job.
Speaker 1:You're not at church, right?
Speaker 2:now, you didn't mention anything about that before.
Speaker 1:There were a couple of common wedding etiquette mistakes that were listed when I was looking, so I thought it would be fun, just to mention a couple of these like asking the DJ to play your wedding song. That's kind of like not really taking the thunder, but I don't know. It's just like that's not cool. Moving tables and chairs, like when they have a sign seating, moving things around, oh, like if your name is on a table that you don't want to sit at.
Speaker 1:Yes or yeah, or just like moving it in general. It's just like we're not at a restaurant. We're going to push tables together. You know, it's set up the way it needs to be set up. So just leave things alone and sit in your assigned seats. No trading places.
Speaker 2:And those are all really thought out so far in advance. Yeah, like, have you seen where they have like a big poster board with all the different tables and then they have little stickies that they're moving around to see who's going to sit with you? Oh, we don't want Aunt Bessie to sit with Aunt Gloria, because they don't get along, you know that's one of the things.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you don't have a cat fight at the wedding. They're all behind all of that. Yeah, there are. Yeah, so that would be a major no-no.
Speaker 2:Also asking the bartender, you know, to make a special drink. That's not a part of whatever is there.
Speaker 1:So if it's an open bar, then you probably have whatever you want.
Speaker 2:But usually what you see is there's beer and wine and then you have like a craft cocktail that the groom chose and one that the bride chose, that you know have some kind of fun name to it or whatever. And those are the drinks.
Speaker 1:That's when my work holiday party was huh.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Same kind of thing, yeah, same kind of thing.
Speaker 2:But I mean in order to plan for things and make sure you have enough. That seems like a logical way to do it. Now, if you have some big you know, big country club wedding and a massive invitation list, you might have a very different kind of setup.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, a lot of the time when I see that it's like I feel like the event becomes more about the event and not about what you're there for, and so that's why I hesitate, like even when you, when you hear about okay, again, going back to some of my reality shows, these brides saying, well, my wedding, I don't want that at my wedding and I'd be going. It's not your wedding, you're getting married to someone else. Does he have an opinion? I mean, I would love for the guys to have an opinion. That has not been my experience, which was unfortunate because I would have loved to have planned with someone else, but I picked everything that I wanted, yeah, and he didn't care. He really could not have cared less. Like given two shits less. He did not care about the color of the ribbon, just what time, do I need to be there?
Speaker 2:Kind of a thing which you know.
Speaker 1:I mean with COVID-19, since the pandemic you know, I think that this is another etiquette thing there's a lot of people that you know. If they're planning an event where there's a lot of people, you might be asked to mask up. That is a possibility and even though the pandemic's over and it's not required, like in so many places now, somebody personally might want, even though it's not a thing.
Speaker 2:Well, maybe they're compromised or maybe they got someone else.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so you might be asked to do that and you need to just do it, regardless of how you feel about that.
Speaker 2:Well, and that's where it comes down to not your personal beliefs or putting your twist on things, but trying to be respectful of people that have taken that opportunity to invite you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean it's a big deal. Their wedding is a big deal. If you're invited to me, it's a big deal. Yeah, you know. So I mean you take it as a big deal and plan accordingly. Yeah, I know there were weddings that did take place during the pandemic. Lots that were canceled, certainly. Yeah, a gal that I had actually traveled to Bali with had her wedding all planned and they had to cancel everything. Yeah, and then, you know, got married, like a year later or something.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2:So it does happen, yeah, and if the bride and groom and or the wedding party had preferred mass. I know there was a lot of controversy around that too, because people are I'm not wearing a mask, yeah, I'm not getting vaccinated, or you had to get vaccinated to go to the wedding.
Speaker 1:Right, you know, let people just talk that out, yeah.
Speaker 2:They're just like. You know what I'm not really comfortable with that yeah, they just don't go, yeah, and you just decline, give them your regrets and don't go, for whatever reason, but I wouldn't create controversy around it. It's their day, right? You know? So if that's what they want, then that's what they should have. Yeah, that's how I look at it.
Speaker 1:Definitely there's. You know it's an interesting. Like I was saying before, it's an interesting party, this whole wedding thing that people have to plan. There are so many facets to it, just looking at etiquette things and who's responsible for what and all the different things that there are offshoots that you know go along with, like I was saying, bridal showers, you know, bachelorette parties bachelorette parties, just all the things.
Speaker 1:Who's paying for what? There's just like so much stuff, mm-hmm. I yeah, I just don't even. I don't know I've not. Two of my sons got married. They weren't too big of a thing, but you know some of the stuff I see it's like ooh, holy smokes, mm-hmm. And back to the original question that you were talking about when we started was you know, would I take money for a down payment on a house or would I do all that money for a wedding? I now, in my older, more mature head, would take the money for a down payment on a house hands down.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm with you completely on that, and so that's that's the other thing too. It's like if you're getting married at our age, you obviously don't have your parents funding your wedding for you, right? If you're getting married and you're in your 30s, you probably don't have a lot of that going on either, and so you have to think about the people that are in your life, and can they participate in the way that you want them to, with whatever it is that you envision?
Speaker 1:Yeah, so for those of you that are, you know, approaching this season of wedding bliss, like so many do in the spring and summertime, good luck to you. Nothing but good luck.
Speaker 2:There's nothing better than like a good old fashioned wedding with a reception and everybody's happy.
Speaker 1:It's actually been a while since I've been to one couple of years.
Speaker 2:I was like four years.
Speaker 1:It's been a long time since I've been to a wedding. Come on y'all, Somebody get me. Come on, Jules Can you get married already.
Speaker 2:Maybe the next one will be your own.
Speaker 1:And on that note, yeah, oh boy.
Speaker 2:I know, sorry, yeah, I think again we're going to have people that have kids that are going to be planning this stuff, and I don't know. I think everybody wants to make the day special, for if it's the person that is their kid, or if it's your sibling or you know whatever, you want it to be a special day, and everybody has different financial limitations. Yeah, not everybody, but most everybody does. So that's something to be realistic about. And then, really kind of getting down to the core of it, we would get married for the second time. I look at it totally different.
Speaker 1:Totally different.
Speaker 2:I don't care about all of that stuff. That was so, so, so important to me when I was 24 years old. Yeah, the color matching of the ribbon. You know I really wasn't looking at the bigger picture in the same way that I would look at it today.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and just know that there is like so much information out there available to help with everything. So if you're not quite sure where to start, just start there, or you know you could just live in sin. Or you could just live in sin, Says Jules. I'm not that no nobody. Peace out yeah.