Spring's rejuvenating spirit has swept into the podcast studio, and Simone and I are here to share it with you—complete with the laughter and heartfelt conversations that have become our hallmark. We kick things off by reflecting on the bittersweet truth that, while spontaneous nights out with friends are still a riot, they now come with a hangover toll that seems unfairly steeper than in our youth. But it's not all headaches and remedies; I've taken an exhilarating leap into a new adventure as a radio presenter, and I'm buzzing to bring you along on the journey of embracing the unexpected twists of life.
As our conversation blossoms, we wade through the sentimental waters of looking back at the year gone by. From the evolution of our on-air personas to the personal growth that has rooted itself in our lives, we celebrate the milestones and the wisdom earned along the way. Yet it's not just reflections that fill our time—reality TV like Big Brother returns to our screens, stirring up the excitement (and the occasional technical hiccup). But it's a listener's candid question about the elusive spark in marriage that ignites a deeper discussion—how do we keep the flame alive amidst the reality of routine and complacency? Simone and I don't shy away from the tough stuff, and we delve into the heart of what makes a relationship truly fulfilling.
Finally, we strip away the filters and face the issues that hit close to home: body image and the comparison trap. We share our personal trials and tribulations with self-love, from battling insecurities to navigating the pressures of social media. And just when things get heavy, we pivot to the complexity of the death penalty, examining its place in our society and the disparities that taint its execution. But don't worry, we always find our way back to laughter, closing out the episode with a playful guess-the-celebrity-age game that proves time, much like our podcast, is full of surprises. Join us for a ride through the highs, the lows, and everything in between—because that's just life, and we're all in it together.
Mel & Simone xxx
Spring's rejuvenating spirit has swept into the podcast studio, and Simone and I are here to share it with you—complete with the laughter and heartfelt conversations that have become our hallmark. We kick things off by reflecting on the bittersweet truth that, while spontaneous nights out with friends are still a riot, they now come with a hangover toll that seems unfairly steeper than in our youth. But it's not all headaches and remedies; I've taken an exhilarating leap into a new adventure as a radio presenter, and I'm buzzing to bring you along on the journey of embracing the unexpected twists of life.
As our conversation blossoms, we wade through the sentimental waters of looking back at the year gone by. From the evolution of our on-air personas to the personal growth that has rooted itself in our lives, we celebrate the milestones and the wisdom earned along the way. Yet it's not just reflections that fill our time—reality TV like Big Brother returns to our screens, stirring up the excitement (and the occasional technical hiccup). But it's a listener's candid question about the elusive spark in marriage that ignites a deeper discussion—how do we keep the flame alive amidst the reality of routine and complacency? Simone and I don't shy away from the tough stuff, and we delve into the heart of what makes a relationship truly fulfilling.
Finally, we strip away the filters and face the issues that hit close to home: body image and the comparison trap. We share our personal trials and tribulations with self-love, from battling insecurities to navigating the pressures of social media. And just when things get heavy, we pivot to the complexity of the death penalty, examining its place in our society and the disparities that taint its execution. But don't worry, we always find our way back to laughter, closing out the episode with a playful guess-the-celebrity-age game that proves time, much like our podcast, is full of surprises. Join us for a ride through the highs, the lows, and everything in between—because that's just life, and we're all in it together.
Mel & Simone xxx
It's the. Bougie Blonde podcast with Melissa and Simone, available on Spotify, apple or wherever you get your podcasts. Now let's get bougie. Hi, I'm Melissa. Hi, I'm Simone. Our podcast is serving you, besty vibes.
Speaker 2:We are just two country girls chatting about all things we struggle with daily life.
Speaker 1:And, of course, talking about certain issues that some people are afraid to speak about. We give it to you real, while having crack along the way. Remember, these are just our opinion, girls, so don't take us too seriously. We're just giving you some best friend advice. Hi, simone, how are you today?
Speaker 2:Hello, I'm very well, how are you?
Speaker 1:Oh sure, look this beautiful spring day. You know whether it's getting better and more cheerful.
Speaker 2:Exactly Like they say March of Mami Wethers yeah.
Speaker 1:I'm happy to be in March. I feel like it's a new beginning.
Speaker 2:New positivity, so I love in life.
Speaker 1:Love in life, yeah.
Speaker 2:I'm not really because, like I'm like Jesus Christ on my 26th next week.
Speaker 1:Oh, you're still a Bobby.
Speaker 2:You're still a Bobby. Oh no, I don't feel it. I feel 46. 46. It's a wear and tear.
Speaker 1:No, you literally don't look. You don't even look 26. So you're all good.
Speaker 2:I try not to.
Speaker 1:Well, I tell you one thing I definitely feel my age because I went out for a few drinks at the weekend and literally I had five drinks, five drinks, someone. And I woke up ropey, the next morning. I even said to the girls like I thought it was just me. They're like no, I'm the same. I'm like what is wrong with us? Like I don't think, I don't know, I'm blaming. It must be like a bad batch of wine or something had to be.
Speaker 2:Oh, you know what, like I told you, I just can't do it anymore. I'm in my grand era and I'm saying yeah.
Speaker 2:I like to go Like I went to Sunday for dinner on Saturday night. So I went to a brunch first because my wife said last week's podcast, the girls really. So we're like, right, we'll go out, we'll have a good night Whenever in spontaneous the day. We said, right, look, we'll just go, we'll just go to it. 5am Sunday morning I come in and it's like why, why is this my life right now? Are you dying, absolutely dying? And then me and Emily went to a brunch on the beach Sunday morning and then went on one of my friends boat and drank a bit of Keelah again. No way. So I did all this weekend and it was not a vibe, let me tell you, because yesterday I don't even know how I managed to come to the gym yesterday, but I was like I need to go just to my jumps. I was like it's in my head, I'm not home over. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I sometimes just I don't know. You try to tell yourself you're hungover, though, but I feel like two or three o'clock is when it really hits, definitely, isn't it? Yeah, it's the tiredness. I'm still defeated, but you do, though. You get that like it does, like it messes you up until the Thursday of that week.
Speaker 2:I'm just like one to Keelah, two to Keelah, three to Keelah floor.
Speaker 1:Yeah, gone, don't remember a thing.
Speaker 2:But yeah, he was unreal. Sorry for your like such a good vibe, was it? It's an atmosphere like I'm not really want to be into, like house, but he's a different level, isn't it? Like you know so much.
Speaker 1:When you have a good night you don't really mind the hangovers, like I'm like if I have a good night with good music and go crack, I don't mind the hangovers by hate wastes and hangovers on like unnecessary nights out yeah.
Speaker 2:You know, it's always spontaneous. Nights are always the best.
Speaker 1:Always the best. Yeah, they are, you just have it. Just, I think there's even no expectations of the night, so like you kind of just go with the flow. You're not as, like you know, if you plan a night or like we're going here, we're doing this, we're doing this, and then it kind of like yeah, or excited yeah In the right way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, anyway, you have exciting news to tell us.
Speaker 1:I do, I do.
Speaker 2:Go on.
Speaker 1:So you're looking at a new presenter, radio presenter and I was exaggeration. I do have my own segment on radio. I'm their beauty and makeup expert. So I'm on KCLR. Who would have taught?
Speaker 2:Well, I could see it from the minute we set up this podcast. To be honest, really like. This is right up your street, just visualising you just doing that Like and that's just being your dream job. I feel like you're so well set up for it and your personality, everything. It just fits you to like, find out.
Speaker 1:It's mad, though, because I was like reflecting, like over the last couple of days and even though it's like a small thing, but like I would have never taught and seen myself on radio like as a child or as a teenager, or even like five years ago. It's something that I just did not see. Come on.
Speaker 2:Well, it's mad how you just evolved as a person, yeah, and I think all these doors that open and lead you to like the right path in your dream career. Yeah, it's mad, you're working up every day and just doing what you love. So who knows where this might take you? So it's like fun.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's mad Like starting out as a makeup artist and then kind of venturing into like being, as you want to call it, like blog or influencing, I think I don't know. I just it's weird. I feel like people like I feel like looking back, I feel like people found it hard to accept that transition of myself. Does that make sense? So, like I was known as the makeup artist and then when you change your identity to try because obviously I started to evolve and obviously become more confident and started speaking about different products and stuff and so obviously naturally went into the influence, and I found that people, like some people accept me as the makeup artist but wouldn't accept me as an influencer. Does that make sense? Yeah, definitely. It's like because I kind of started to change my identity A lot of people don't really like change.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I'm changed to get me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't think they meant it in a bad way, like I don't think, but it was like the found it hard to see me kind of maybe doing stepping out with that role and into something new. And I feel like definitely over the last year the same probably. Like I feel like we start out in something and then we learn, like that we actually have new skills and we kind of evolve, and then we just go into something completely different.
Speaker 2:It's not that we was like you, never like. Looking back on my childhood, I've always loved like fashion, beauty, fitness Do you get me? Yeah, but I never thought I'd see the day where I'd be kind of collaborating with all these different brands and, you know, getting like going to all these events and stuff like that, when I was back at home and I'm just repeating, they're not out here, which is quite sad.
Speaker 1:And it's amazing now because you have to develop such a massive skill set now for, like, marketing and PR, like, which is amazing.
Speaker 2:You never thought I'd see myself doing yeah, like compared to like. I feel like that's the background that I might go down in the near future, who knows, yeah, and just all the stuff that you experience in your life of even like moving over here, how my confidence has increased, how I've kind of found myself and my passion, even though, like, like I said, like it, unfortunately enough, like a lot of collaborations, because people don't shift to try and just yeah, and I feel like I've got a lot of money issues and stuff like that involved in it.
Speaker 2:But I've still found out in myself that I absolutely loved young social media and I love fashion, love beauty, and that's never going to change. But I feel like I've evolved and I feel like, if I ever do come home and get back into that proper industry of doing all that again, I feel like my confidence level is a lot higher than it was when I did live back at home.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and especially now you're coming back to Ireland with a brand new skill set that you didn't have going out of the body. Yeah, you can come back in now to a PR marketing company or eventually, probably even set up your own PR marketing. Yeah, you know it's mad Like how just one year could just completely change things it is.
Speaker 2:It's actually crazy, though, like I'd rather reflect on it, yeah it baffles me as well.
Speaker 1:Like really like a motion last week when like how did this happen? And again.
Speaker 2:I still so proud of you, though.
Speaker 1:I know, but I still feel like it was my mom and your message to me was like ah. Yeah, like it's just it's. It's just, I feel like there's so much. Even Keith said this to me. He was like there's so much more to you than just a make up. He was like there's just so much more that people haven't seen. And when he said that I was kind of like yeah, I think there is, like I feel like I do have quite a big personality but haven't really shown it much.
Speaker 2:If that makes sense, yeah, do you know, because I think I think when you're so like you have a busy life and you're working on the weekends and then you're working with beauty and fashion, and then I think you kind of found yourself more when we set up the podcast. Definitely 100% To get me yeah, and even though you were talking on your stories and this and that I feel like you were able to make a connection with presenting, yeah, even though we weren't really.
Speaker 2:We started off more doing like a friendly podcast just on normal day to day life and a little bit of education here and there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but like you really did find yourself, I think the book was so good. Like, if you like, listen back to our podcast. Like I know, this episode has been so unscripted. Me and someone were just going.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we actually have just went down a little around and I love that, I love track.
Speaker 1:I like when this happens in our podcast because it just means raw and real. But even like with you like compared to our first podcast, because Simone was like so nervous on the first like podcast and I was even pumped for her.
Speaker 1:No, I got into that. I know what she's like in real life. Like she's so like bubbly and energetic person and such a nice person and I was like, come on, like Simone is like you need to like showcase your personality and over like the last year, like you have transformed as well, though like on the pod I think both of us have. It's like I feel like we're like. It's just like looking back at your younger self, like it's just I'm shivers, yeah. Like it's just mad how much a year can do in someone, and even it might be the smallest thing. Like we obviously haven't met millions in the year. We obviously like we probably thought that we would have been further along in the year, but still, when you look back personally, we've both grown so much. Definitely.
Speaker 2:And I would put my hand up and say I have not listened to that first episode in a very long time.
Speaker 1:I wish we were both so like just, it was all new, like it's just mad, like we're still here a year. It actually is we in Simone, it actually is our year. It was a year back then, like two weeks ago, and we actually completely forgot about it. We were like, okay, we need to have like a special episode now for this.
Speaker 2:We still need to do that. Yeah, we need to, like come up with a plan of what exactly we're going to do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but we are a year on the pod, so it is quite, I suppose, this emotional episode, but it is like we're just expressing our love and compassion for each other. Yeah, but it is mad, like when you look back at your younger self, like, like, if you can imagine your 15 year old self and like, say, your partner, yourself now going back to your 15 year old self, like you just give them so much advice, yeah, it's mad.
Speaker 2:I definitely would 100% Like, even though we're coming on this topic like it actually kind of it's it's blending into the topic.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:It is.
Speaker 1:It is.
Speaker 2:So we didn't go too far off.
Speaker 1:No, we didn't. We just like to have a little chat each other. Yeah, you know, of course. But yeah, like, have you actually talked about big personalities? Big brother started last night and I'm actually so buzzing for it. I just think it's going to be brilliant.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I actually you know what. This is why I make song so much. There's never a big teleperson but big brother, love Island and keeping our, keeping our keeping up with the Kardashians. They're like my number one. Go to their happy place. Yeah, and I'm like I feel like I need to bounce up for you every week to fill me in. And they were like I can obviously see some from TikTok and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's just not the same.
Speaker 1:I think big brother would be hard meant like harder than love Island mentally.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because I feel like.
Speaker 1:I feel like with love Island it's scripted to an extent and you're told by producers where to go watch to, which is probably really annoying, but with big brother you have alcohol involved. So sorry guys, means one of the technical difficulty there. We thought we were getting hacked by Facebook and Metta and Instagram.
Speaker 2:We were having this for all. I had to literally Google it. I was like what is going on in the world? Literally logs of everything. Yeah, Podcast, it wasn't working. The app wasn't working for us. I know this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but look, the universe is against today. So onto our juicy jammy Dodger dilemma. Thank you everyone who sends in their dilemma as well, and this one caught my eye this week, so we're going to give this one a blast. So, hey, girls love your podcast. You both should be so proud, hoping you can help, as I know you give great advice in your dilemma. So we hope we do, we hope you do. We don't don't fully go on our advice, but we try to help.
Speaker 1:I married about seven months and I feel I have made the biggest mistake of my life. I feel guilty even typing this. I've been with my husband for five years, but I feel since we got married, everything has changed. The spark has just gone. He has changed. He makes no effort anymore and he has become more demanding. He's not the man I married. Should I leave him or what should I do? I deserve to be happy and don't want to be and don't want to stay in a marriage for the sake of it. Is this normal, or do other women experience this issue after marriage?
Speaker 2:Now I would put my hands up first of all and say that I'm not sure what kind of advice I could give on that because I'm not married.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think what happens is. I think what happens is is the honeymoon phase.
Speaker 1:Yeah, sometimes we have expectations after marriage. You're on such a high and I feel like then it just goes back to normal life. There's no real difference between being married and not being married, apart from really a piece of paper. Obviously, it's more your decisions are as a couple. I feel like it can be. Maybe people's expectations of what marriage is is not what it actually is. I feel like sometimes it might be in a bit of a fantasy of like this is going to be all sunshine and roses and then, from the male point of view, males can get a bit comfortable and feel like they don't this can happen in normal relationships as well like they feel like they don't have to graft anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they just kind of get settled and lazy and want to be mothers.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it is an Irish thing that men want to be mothers. Yeah, now, from this dilemma I'm not sure what, like, the ins and outs are on a daily basis Like has become more, has been become more demanding, I presume I'm getting, I'm picking up on that, that it's mean and that, like, maybe he's expecting her to do wifey chores is what I'm thinking.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Do you know what I mean? Yeah, 100%. And like is he expecting like her to be like doing dinners? And I wonder what age these are as well. Like I feel like Are they a bit older?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know. I do feel like sometimes in relationships with one, when I do get winds of like marriages not working out or relationships not working out or whatever, like you said, like it's not all sunshine and roses.
Speaker 1:No, no relationships.
Speaker 2:Perfect. No, and I feel like when people get very comfortable around someone, especially men, they just tend to be a little bit more laid back and, especially in the home or just in general life, like they're kind of keep, like you said, well, it's a lot of graft and they're not trying to make efforts and this, that and the other. But if it's demanding into a fact that like he's proper tender, what to do on a daily basis, whether it's in the house or outside the house, or like being very manipulative and telling her what to do, yeah I don't think that's a healthy way to go.
Speaker 2:No it's not, that's toxic and that's actually a good point, simone.
Speaker 1:I wonder is it, is he kind of controlling her life outside of marriage? To an extent? Have been like who she can see when she can go see her friends, like is it that type that she's means?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's kind of hard to judge it from the dilemma that was set in.
Speaker 1:She said he's not the man I married, so obviously he's changed, changed yeah.
Speaker 2:I would have a chat with him though.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like I'd start off by having a chat of like explaining how you feel and that, like you're a bit uncomfortable of the situation and just fucking say it blunt out, like there's a difference between being someone's wife and their mother. And I feel like a lot of Irish men have this expectations of women, especially the older generation. It was just the generation they were brought up in, so you need to make it quite clear that that is not your role. To be a mother. It's our old wife, is two way partnership and you both have lives outside of being a couple. But you do deserve to be happy and Donald's saying the marriage and obviously they got married for a reason they both absolutely love each other.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. So maybe something just went a little bit wrong.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and like it could be fixed. You know what I mean. Like a clear communication and I feel if that doesn't work, like there is so many people going to like couple therapy and things like that Do you know what I mean? Like sometimes just a it's just the communication gets mixed up in all the hustle and bustle.
Speaker 2:So like it could be cleared up, I think the best thing to do is just have a chat, and because if you let it go any further it's just gonna get worse and then it's just going to lead into a disaster. So I think when it's on the tip of your thumb now, just tell them exactly how you feel and then try solve the problems before they get any worse.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and like that, marriage is hard. Do you know what I mean? Like there's going to be rough patches or some of the great patches and like that, the rough patches sometimes. You just have to have that clear communication and work on it, you know what I mean and work through it Exactly.
Speaker 1:And if you really want to work through you, make it happen Like you need to compromise, but if it comes to a point that's like toxic, yeah, that's a no go area either. So you have to kind of be clear what you're understanding between what to bump on the road and what's toxic.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:My best advice.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because if it's definitely telling her what to do, what to wear, what to eat you see from commerce go then. That's where you just need to call out to us because, I'm sorry, I mean personally even though you might sit down and have a conversation about it, might change for a while, but it's not going to change his personality and his perspective of life, like if he thinks about marrying her, he's going to change her and change her as a person. Yeah, yeah. That's not okay.
Speaker 1:No, and it's sad if that is the case. Do you know? And it does happen Like. It does happen so much Like do you know what I mean? And then a lot of women are afraid to leave marriages because they're afraid of what people?
Speaker 1:say Exactly, and it's so sad Like we are in a modernized, like society now. Do you know what I mean? I think it is more common for people to walk away from marriages, but I think life is too short. Life is too short To be stuck with someone that you're not happy with, like there was not treating you with respect and respecting your boundaries and wants the best for you and is your biggest support system Like that is what you need from a partner.
Speaker 2:Yeah, 100%.
Speaker 1:Do you know? So if you're not getting that, you need to communicate that, and if it still doesn't happen after you communicate it, well then you kind of have to decide what you want to do.
Speaker 2:We hope we're giving you the right advice. And I hope it's not the toxic environment that you're already doing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like it's hard to give advice to this one because I don't know the answer now. Yeah, it's hard, but I hope that a little bit of guidance helps. So if you have any dilemmas or funny stories, make sure you send them to us at wwwthepoorthyvanspodcastcom or you can DM us as well.
Speaker 2:So on this week's topic, we're speaking a little bit about body image and body hatred.
Speaker 1:I feel like this is something that every single woman experiences Like nearly every day. Yeah, Like I don't think it's like a once a week thing. I actually think it's an everyday thing for every woman, Whether it's their base, whether it's their body, whether it's I don't know. It's hard. We're just constantly comparing ourselves to older people aren't we?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and like it's hard for me to say this because I don't think I ever expressed it as much, even talking on the podcast, but when I was younger, like obviously I was like choppier than what I am now?
Speaker 2:Yeah, but no matter how much like everyone's body fluctuates, it's going to be completely the same size the whole year out. Especially, we know a little bit more because obviously we're into the gym and stuff like that. You have a gain of faith, you have a shred, do you get me? Yeah, it's all little things like that, but I feel like, if I'm being honest, no matter what weight or what weight I am, or it's not even about the scales, but in general it's always in my head I need to feel more, need to eat clean more, I need to, and constantly I feel, yeah, like obviously I'm happy, but I don't think I'll ever be completely and entirely happy with the way I look when I look in the mirror.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I don't know if it's. I don't think every woman is the same.
Speaker 1:Oh, someone, 100% and like that because looking at I think you have an unbelievable physique, you are in serious shape, but like that, coming from someone, it shows your perspective, though, like for me, looking at you, I'm like amazing body and you're still insecure. And the same with me people look at me and I'm still insecure. Do you know what I mean? I have certain parts of my body that I don't like and I think Give me your body, please.
Speaker 2:Thank you, I just stick it on there.
Speaker 1:We're never happy, though, are we Like? Why are we constantly comparing ourselves to other women?
Speaker 2:If, I'm being honest, it does go down to your childhood as well, a little bit it does yeah. Because, like every single day in school, I hate going to school because of the bullying, the nasty comments people are making to get me yeah, like I can't see. Like, oh, she's have chubby or no, hello chubby. Or like when you walk down the street the whole ground shakes like an earthquake, like, and those, the whole primary school, yeah, and they stick with you in your head. They do, they never leave.
Speaker 1:They never leave, like those comments that from 10, 12, 15 years ago, 20 years ago, they stick in your subconscious mind. Yeah, and I know a lot of people blame social media. But social media.
Speaker 2:It was still there even before social media.
Speaker 1:It was still there before social media and I feel like social media actually has such a positive impact on health and fitness as well, like it's actually spreading so much like awareness, like there's so many people we can follow now who actually give out like good nutritional, health and fitness advice, they kind of. Since social media it has encouraged people to be more healthy and fit and go out running and go cycling and Like look at all the increasing people running now. Yeah, that's from social media.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly Because everyone's something on that little bandwagon.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like it's just, it goes through little phases, it goes through its gym phases, it's running phases, then it'll go to like yoga phases, like it goes on a cycle, everything. But I know we always like compare things to social media, how it's bad but social media actually can be good. But like that, people do compare themselves to other women through social media. But you're actually nailed it on the head, simone. This came way before social media.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It is from a us issue, from things that have happened in our childhood 100%.
Speaker 2:It is and I always say it like kids can be so nasty, so nasty, and we actually said this in last week's podcast and we've bring it up. It is, it's I don't know what it is, but especially in schools and with girls and stuff like that. And then I think, as you get a little bit older and you start taking care of yourself and looking after yourself, yeah, then that's when it gets a little bit worse, because when people see you trying to do well for yourself and trying to look better and be better, they automatically want to bring up your past in the way you looked and they literally try their best to reel out a fat picture of you and send it to you to try around your date.
Speaker 2:But if you don't laugh at it off, then they're winning. Don't get me wrong. There was many years where I didn't laugh it off.
Speaker 1:Do you feel that you would be triggered by someone commenting on your weight? Would it bring you back to that childhood you?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I would never, ever, ever. I don't care who it is, I never comment on anybody's weight. Never. I don't care if they're really skinny, if they have a little bit of weight on them, I don't comment. I always say, oh my God, she looks amazing what she's wearing. Oh my God, she's stunning. I never comment on someone's weight. If that and I'm kind of more supportive, I'd be more kind of like oh my God, she's wearing that outfit and it's just her body shape, or do you get?
Speaker 1:what I mean.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's funny to say that about not commenting on people's weight. Charlie Murphy actually had this up on her story today, that someone wrote to her and said that no way was she a size small or whatever. Size eight and I think she replied she said well, what size do you think I am? She's like oh, you're definitely more like a 10 to 12 or something like that. And even Charlie was like yeah, even Charlie was like why do you feel the need to comment on my weight? And even she said she's like I would never comment on anyone's weight.
Speaker 1:But why do people have to guess what's like, as if she's lying about it? Why would she have? Why would she lie about her size, like if she's saying what size she wears and clothes, like it? Just, I don't know. People just feel the need they have to have an opinion on everything and I just think just don't comment on someone's weight. And I was talking to this to actually Maria today. Like when people go through periods of stress, they can lose weight or gain weight, but me personally, I actually lose weight, you know. So then you will get the skinny comments I've just gone very skinny or your face very drawn, but like they don't know what that person is going through.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like you could be having the fucking shitest time of your life and people are commenting on your weight, which isn't helping the situation.
Speaker 2:And so it's nasty. In my opinion, like it's it's really nasty and like it's like people's body changes like throughout a course out of a year or two years. Like you get older, your metabolism slows down. Like it's all these things to get me Period as well.
Speaker 1:Like me personally, I gain weight like that week of my period. Yeah, because you're like.
Speaker 2:I swell, I'm like a bloke yeah.
Speaker 1:I swell, yeah. So I'm so bloating on my period, just like all around my stomach, my face, everywhere. Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:And the same. I literally look like a swollen balloon and I'm not even like and I actually dread going into the gym when I'm on my period because I'm not in the mirror.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and there's like you have all these like little bits of like skin popping out that never popped out before You're like what is this Like? Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:But I think we need to like I don't know it's, it's very hard to love, I know it's very cliche, but I know we always say like you need to love yourself and you need to wake up up every morning and be happy in your own skin and your own body or whatever. And you know, maybe if it comes to time where you do want to lose weight and feel a little bit of happiness in your sense. But if I don't think people understand though I don't know if you're the same as the bottom, like no matter what it is, even if it's my weight or like, thank God, I don't really feel like that about my appearance, much so as I deal about my weight and everyone is different Because of what I went through when I was younger. I think that makes sense.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I don't think anyone is going to be 100% happy with their body, and if they are, I feel like I need a little bit of that, yeah.
Speaker 1:And I think it's. It's nice to kind of like even speak about it, like because I feel like that's what we do on this podcast, like we do keep it very real and we we explain like as normal, like we never try to put on a fake show on here, like we say exactly what we're feeling and thinking and it's nice to kind of like, like you know, relate that as well to like our listeners and stuff. That like you're not alone if you are feeling like this. Like no matter what size someone is or what way you think they feel about themselves, they actually don't. Like everyone has their own inner demons and all, all traumas and things that can be triggered from stuff from their past.
Speaker 2:I always say to people when, when they do ask like, like, how don't you go on my own? And like, oh my God, no, I look huge in this. I'm not wearing it. We've all been there, We've all had them moments, and the girls are like, oh my God, what just happened? I'm like, no, I am happy I've accepted the body that I'm in. But I'm like, yeah, I, I'm still going to work at it because I love going to the gym and there's obviously improvements that you want to in yourself to get me something.
Speaker 2:I don't want people to think that I absolutely hate the body that I'm in, because I don't, but I'm just saying like it's for people out there Listen it's been able to accept the body that you're in and learn to love the body that you're in, and then, if you want to progress it in your fitness journey, or if it's whether you just want to, like feel good within yourself or go for a walk or a run or go to the gym and stuff like that, it's it's the little things, I think that builds up your confidence and changes your mindset. That makes sense 100%.
Speaker 1:I couldn't agree with you more like, like what you said, there's not a wrong and want to improve your health and your fitness. Like that is what we shall be doing, but it's doing it for the right reasons. Like that, too, to live a longer life, to have a healthier mind, to help you with time management, to release stress and, of course, along the way, you're going to get toned and you're going to like get feel more comfortable in your clothes and like you're going to feel a bit more confident. But, as you said, simone, we could still go to the gym four times a week. I want more and more and want this and want that and don't go wrong.
Speaker 2:It's a good, healthy habit to be addicted, to want to go for that. I personally, do go for it from my head it's, it's my escapism, even though, yeah, I want to look and feel good. Yeah, it's a bonus, but it's yours as well. I see you go to like it's like an escape from the world.
Speaker 2:You put your headphones in, you take out all your anger in there, yeah, like you're just in a little happy bubble and not everyone feels that way either. So it's been able to accept like if they're your friends or your family, like when you speak about the gym and your passion for it. Not everyone is in that bubble. So when we're talking about accepting like body image and body hatred, we need to understand as well that not everyone loves the gym and not everyone is able to come out of that hatred in themselves of how they feel on the inside because of other people's opinions on the shape or size that they're in 100%.
Speaker 1:I've seen it really good. I forget who said. If I remember, I'll put it up on the podcast page, but you're meant to stand fully naked front of your mirror every morning and tell yourself five times that you love yourself. And it actually does scientific studies on it and yeah, like I think after like the month people actually learn to accept like certain parts of their body and stuff and actually felt more confident.
Speaker 2:I love that, though, because it is so true. And it's even down to affirmations. I know we say it the whole time when you send out positivity and believe that this is who you are and you love the skin that you're in. That's when your confidence increases. You start kind of feeling yourself a little bit more and to get me, yeah, but it is hard and it's other people's opinions I think that hurt hurt people the most. Yeah it's the comments.
Speaker 1:It's the comments, yeah, and I think I think, honestly, if you are going to, like send out a hurtful message to someone else, like purposely take the time to write to them something critical about themselves, it honestly is from that person being deeply unhappy about something in their life and they just haven't. Instead of taking the time and the work to work on themselves because it might be painful for them, it's easier for them to project it onto someone else, yeah 100%, and it's sad to think that there is people out there that want to do that and treat people that way.
Speaker 2:But unfortunately it's a crazy, big, bad world we live in and sometimes we just need to put it in the back of our minds. And I know it's not easy, it's not. I've been there, I've been true, but it's not an easy ride, but thank God I've you know, and I'm just speaking from my point of view of how it is growing up, of being bullied at a very young age and then, when I actually think back, I'm thinking back to how I looked at myself in the mirror every day and I hated and cried. It's sad.
Speaker 1:It is really sad, and if you had to go back to your younger self now, you'd give her a big hug, yeah.
Speaker 2:I 100% know when I look back, I wasn't like I wasn't huge, it was. My parents would say, well, maybe that wasn't.
Speaker 1:But it was people's opinions made you feel bigger than you were. Yeah, as well, do you know what I mean? Because, like, I feel like that, like because I always got comments about having small boobs and that, as you said, those little comments still a fucking affect me to this day, yeah, and I have to constantly like big myself up and like, no, they're lovely you know, even though I might fully believe it, but I have grown to accept it and like them.
Speaker 1:I don't love my boobs, but I like them and I'm comfortable in them. Do you know? That's kind of weird. So everyone has an insecurity, like somewhere you know and like. I think we just have to learn to try small but every day, just like, like, accept our bodies, that I love yourself a little more.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, yeah, I love that little chat, so I hope that helps someone out there Like, and I hope that you know you don't feel alone if you are going through any like self-hatred or constantly, you know, just not liking your body Because, at the end of the day, lads, we're all women, we're all human. We're all human. We all go through different like patterns in our lives, where we're gay and loose, like women give birth. You are amazing, by the way. Do you know what?
Speaker 2:I mean Normal women, to say the least.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like, do you know what I mean? And as you get older, like if you go through menopause, you're going to put on more weight and like, and like that. It's just like, try to stay active and just have a positive mind and like, yeah, I hope that helps. Okay, so we have our big hat of mystery.
Speaker 2:Go for it.
Speaker 1:Give it to us, should the death penalty still exist? No, oh, this has got a priority.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know my opinion yeah I know, I'm the same.
Speaker 1:I'm the same.
Speaker 2:I'm going to talk a little bit deeper than we can. Move on. Okay, go on. Yes, because I don't agree with a lot of things that go on in the world Down to rape, down to anything to do with children generally.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I agree, they're probably and obviously women. I know it works both ways for men and women. I'm not saying I'm not putting my hand in the feminist you know any objection. I'm just saying like it's very hard when you turn on your TV and you see all this stuff going on in the world even now and people get away with it and they get like you see people just walking out of prison greenily after harming a child or harming a woman or a man, whatever it may be, and they get five or six years. But somebody that steals from a shop because he's a different nationality or he has different coloured skin gets life For stealing bread for his family for arguments sake. It's just an example which I just don't understand.
Speaker 1:So yeah, I know, I totally agree with what you're saying.
Speaker 1:In some countries the laws and stuff can be different as well, so some people go to jail for something that I'm like that's ridiculous, like yeah no, I mean in one way I don't think I know I'm going to get a bit of like, a bit of like backlash or this, but I don't feel that anyone has the right to take someone else's life away, even despite of what they've done. Like is it? Is it our right to take someone else's life away? No, I don't think that I just I get really angry.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and with them and someone else I'm like how would you get away with doing that? And like walk out after X amount of years.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, I get what it is, but you can't tell me no, I told it's a hard one. I don't think there's really like a right answer for it, and that's like a yes or no.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but it is kind of a yes and no situation Like so, in some ways, as you said, if I ain't got to with children or like anything got to, like you know, rape or anything like that, you're kind of like, why do they deserve to only get certain right years and walk away? Is the debt penalty, like you know, should they get it Is it crucial, I mean.
Speaker 1:I don't know, it's a hard one Like, and then in the other part to me, the like, the other side, I'm like do we have the right to take a life, another human being away? I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't think I'm probably right into it a little bit more because I actually watched a crime documentary.
Speaker 1:But if there's a serial killer like and they're after going like second murder in 20 women, like I'm like, yeah, even at that, though part of me is like they should get life and just be punished. Yeah, like is it an easy option? Like the debt penalty. Like should they not been like like tortured for like so many years? Like for what they've did to other people? Like, yeah, is the debt penalty too easy for them?
Speaker 2:Like yeah, I do kind of my hands up to say I think I think it is like. I think they need the time to like adjust to what they've done.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Do you?
Speaker 1:get me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like they need to kind of be. I hate saying the word punish, because Jesus, I'm the same as I guess I would be punished if. I'm like, but I'm just like, yeah, I don't know it's, it's really, it is hard, it's a hard question, but I'm a yes and no for it because it depends on what they've done. Yeah, and, like you said, I probably rather them actually just be punished and like adjust into what they've done to another person rather than just kill them off completely.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, okay. Well, that was a deep topic, wasn't it? Yeah?
Speaker 2:it was.
Speaker 1:We went from self love to literally the debt penalty. So that random out of tricks, I guess. Yeah, I tell you the person who writes these. I think they need counseling. So for our game of the week I have guest to age Simone, so are you?
Speaker 2:ready for this.
Speaker 1:So, instead of run the big brother buzz, can you guess how old Sharon Osbourne is? I literally was shook when I actually she's 72 maybe. Oh my God, she's actually 71. Is she?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But, lads, I need to know her plastic surgeon because on believable like that woman does not look or act or have the energy of a 71 year old?
Speaker 2:She really doesn't. And you know what's so weird of how? I kind of guess that because I remember when she was on X Factor, yeah, just with me, like 10 years ago, and she was like, oh, it's fine, she says something about it being her 60th birthday. So I was like, oh, she definitely is like in her early 70s.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it's like 72.
Speaker 2:But yeah, she looks amazing.
Speaker 1:Unbelievable Right and her little sidekick in Big Brother. We have Mr Louis Walsh. Can you guess how old he is? 68. He's actually 71 as well. I'm close, isn't that Henry like?
Speaker 2:But she doesn't look it, I feel like they've never aged.
Speaker 1:No, but yeah, he's looked the same since I'm 10. Yeah, he definitely is a little bit of the Botox stuff, but he looks well, like he does look well, and the two of them are just going to be absolutely hilarious together, like, okay, next up. We're kind of going off the Big Brother. Simon Cowell.
Speaker 2:I have to say in the 70s.
Speaker 1:I know he's actually 64. What, yeah, he looks a lot older, doesn't he? I think?
Speaker 2:he looks. But you know what I think it is? It's the stress that man always even seemed so stressed on on the show.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think he got with too much work done as well, like at one point he looked a bit like yeah, maya Jamma.
Speaker 2:Is she like 24? No, she's 29.
Speaker 1:But I actually think she looks older than 29. Do you, yeah, like, not in a bad way, but like in a like mature, like she's a real woman, isn't she? Yeah?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's the sex appeal on the body I think.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. And then back to Big Brother, who has aikonsu, obviously, is on Big Brother now as well. Who do you think she is? She's 31. 29. She looks like she looks a bit older. I think she's more mature though as well, isn't she Like she's very? Yeah, I feel like she's getting over, like she's getting overpowered in Big Brother.
Speaker 2:Really.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's very quiet, like she's very. She is stunning. A lot of big personalities, stunning, stunning. Well, there's a lot of big personalities in it this year and I say drama. I'll keep you updated, do keep me updated and keep us updated.
Speaker 2:So for affirmation of the week we have. Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.
Speaker 1:Oh, I love that. Yeah, that's nice. That is very, very nice. It's a perfect affirmation for this week's episode, which all involves our younger selves personal growth, low self-esteem, body issues. It was a very wholesome little episode this week. It was, it was, it was a lovely little episode.
Speaker 2:I really enjoyed it.
Speaker 1:It was a lovely little episode and I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you took away some positivity for your week ahead and we will see yous next week. Bye, see you next week. Bye.