Choosing Yourself, Soulmates & Overcoming Fear of Being Alone ft. Cheryl Byrne | Ep 24

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In this week's episode:
» Overcoming the fear of being alone
» How and why you need to choose yourself
» How to become the one
» Soulmate connections

Cheryl Byrne is an Intuitive Guide, Healer & Coach. She help speople access their intuition so they can live a more aligned and fulfilling life. She works with people looking for those looking for love and also those seeking more purpose within their life.
Website: https://thereclaimcoach.com/
IG @thereclaimcoach

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Themes: soulmates, mediation, self-care, self-worth, self-love, fear of being alone, limiting beliefs, intuition 

Transcript

What's up everyone? Welcome back to Becoming the One. I'm so, so excited because today I'm here with Cheryl Byrne and she is the reclaimed coach. She is a guide and healer and she helps people access their intuition, find love, and supports them in finding more purpose in their lives. And I'm so pumped to have you Cheryl say hi.

Hello. I'm so excited to be here. Really excited cause I feel like we've got a lot of juicy things to talk about today.

We do. So today we're gonna talk all about becoming the one, finding your soulmate, the fear of being alone, and how you can overcome that. And so first, I'd love for you to just share your story and how you got to where you are.

Absolutely. So I had my spiritual awakening after the breakup of a very toxic relationship. And following this, I went into Dark Cole, an absolute dark hole. I thought it was the one thing that ruined my life. And when I look back now, I realize it was my catalyst for growth. It was really the thing that woke me up.

It's like that expression, God first throws a pebble, then a rock, then a boulder, and that breakup for me was the boulder. It was my wake up call because when I trace back all my patterns, spirit was always trying to get me to wake up and see the true power that lies within me and lies within all of us. So after this breakup, it was really difficult because I was not only grieving the person, I was grieving the vision that I had for our future, which I thought I was gonna marry this person, have kids with them. I had to move out of our beautiful home that we had together, and it was really the future. It was hard.

I had that. Whole thing mapped out for myself. And when that was taken away from me, I didn't know who I was anymore. And I went to a lot of therapy and had an amazing therapist, and I started getting so curious as to why my life was the way it was. I. Because it looked as if everybody else had their life figured out, and I was the only one experiencing this.

You know, I was in complete victim mentality of feeling that aloneness, thinking that I had done something wrong, and it really wasn't about that, but it was really for me to step into this journey, my mission here on this earth. And while I was doing therapy and exploring personal development, I was also started meditating.

But meditation wasn't about spirituality. It was about actually me for my mental health because I had experienced lots of phases of depression, anxiety, had suicidal thoughts from very early ages, and with that, then my therapist, Started wanting me to find a hobby because a lot of my friends at the time were having babies, getting married, building the houses.

So I felt so alone and she wanted me to find a hobby, and I was like, I don't wanna join a walking club, a dancing club, a reading club. I don't wanna do any of that. So I had to tap into the only thing. That brought me hope, I can't even say it brought me joy at the time. It just brought me a little spark of hope, and that was the personal development world.

So I decided to do a coaching certification because I realized who did I like, I looked at what did they do and they were actually coaches, so I was like, wow, I can do this. Even though I was still. A mess at the time. So it's kind of wild to me how I still had this deeper sense of purpose within me that I wanted to help people when my life appeared to be a mess to me.

But that certification was part of my healing journey, as I'm sure you'll well know as well. When you go through those certifications, you have to go through, undergo a lot of healing as well during it. So when I did the coaching certification afterwards, I started doing different courses about starting the solar line business.

Just kept in doing course after course, after course. And really doing those courses actually led me to accessing my intuition. And during that time, I remember hearing a podcast and I heard a woman on a podcast and I was like, who is she? I need to work with her. And it was Nikki Novo and she teaches people.

How to unlock their intuitive gifts. And it made no sense to me at the time to do that course because I was doing another course. I was finishing up a coaching certification. I was in my nine to five, I was coaching people. It made no sense. And it was $3,000. Like where was I gonna find the time? It made no sense, but something within me was saying, do it.

And I'm so glad I did because taking that leap literally changed the trajectory of my life. And this is a thing when we're accessing our intuition, these big leaps. Have such a fundamental impact on us, and not only changing our, the course of our life, but actually building a connection more to your intuition in trusting yourself to take those big leaps.

So now I'm very passionate about helping people unlock their own codes within them so that they can do what they're ultimately here to do on this earth as well.

What an incredible story and so relatable. I feel like when you describe your story, you're like describing me and my experiences. But yeah, that's so relatable. And tell me more about like intuition. What is that? What is it? You know, how do you even begin to like access that?

So I suppose when I think of the intuition, I think of the human sometimes as two different aspects of us so we can have our ego or higher self, and the ego speaks inferior and lack. And your higher self, or your intuition knows the truth, knows that there's only love in this universe and knows that there's only abundance.

When we become so programmed by our ego and we start putting on these lenses of. Falsehoods of what's not actually real in this universe, we can really fall into the scarcity mindset, the lack mindset, and your intuition because it's so unknown to us. When we're programmed in this way, we think that our intuition is telling us to do something scary.

So that's why a lot of people stay stuck in their ego because it feels safer. The ego's not a bad thing. It's ultimately trying to keep you safe and keeping you safe is protecting you from the unknown. But really the unknown is where your magic is. It's guiding you through your destiny. And your destiny is so unknown, and there's so many ways in which you can access your intuition.

And a lot of people don't like when I give them the one of meditation because there's so many people have these ideas of meditations, and I get it. When I first started meditating, somebody handed me a cd. That's how long ago? It was a cd and it was a 20 minute meditation, and it was hell. I cried the entire time, like not happy tears.

It was just awful. And I remember going, that's it. Meditation isn't for me. And that was a long time before my breakup, but when I actually experienced the breakup, then it was kind of one of those things that was kind of like, okay, why does everyone keep saying meditation? Why does everyone keep saying that this is so good?

And it was really a way to alleviate my anxiety at the time. But when I started going deeper and deeper into the practices, I started connecting with angels. I started getting little hints or little knowings of, read this book, go to this healer, do this thing. And your intuition is always guiding you. And a lot of people feel.

That they're not intuitive. And actually, even when I say that, I have so many people that say to me that they feel they lost their intuition. But when I start, like if I do a reading with them, an energetic reading with them, I'm like, you are really intuitive and deep down, you know it, but it's like as if they're afraid to admit it.

It's like as if they're looking for a permission slip. And sometimes I'll say to them, you know where you've been led? And they're like, well, I might get little sprinkles of ideas, but I'm not really sure. And that's what I love, being able to provide validation for people that they are intuitive and they are always been led.

Yeah, everyone is intuitive. We all have like an intuition where that's like a gut feeling, like whatever it is leading us and giving us what we really need, telling us what's best for us, you know, and a lot of times especially in hard times and. Thinking about my own journey with intuition. I think for me it was more like I would hear something and then immediately I would like question it, and then I would start going to the overthinking and I would be like, no, that's not really it.

I'd rationalize it, you know why I shouldn't do that thing? Because it felt so hard to even like hear that message. And the message was really for me, just a thought. And I just couldn't believe that that was the thing I was supposed to do, you know, because I didn't like it.

Yeah, and that's the thing. It usually is the scary thing. And I think for a lot of people, they hear it, they get a spark of joy. Sometimes not, I'm not saying with your experience, but for me, a lot of people hear something like, Do this thing, do this course, or start the business, start the podcast, start the YouTube channel, and they gotta spark a joy.

And then within a few minutes or a few days, they start going, no, no. That was just, no, that'll never happen. And they start, the ego comes in and start telling you a bazillion different reasons as why it's not a good idea to do it.

Totally. You know, it's so funny that you say that because it's actually kind of how this podcast started and people ask me all the time, like, what? Made you wanna start a podcast and why are you doing this? You know why? What brought it on? And I really just had that moment of like, this is something you should do.

I felt really joyful about it and so I went for it and here we are. Yeah. But it is really those like little things, and it's not always quite that easy, but it's pretty cool when that happens.

Yeah, absolutely. Well, it's like following the nuggets, like following, and I always say to people like, your intuition isn't gonna get you from A to ed. It's gonna get you from A to B, B to C. Like it's up to you to follow the breadcrumbs. Sometimes you might get the bigger vision, you might see yourself with the book or all of the followers or all the money.

You might get a bigger vision as almost like. Dangling Akar to show you the bigger vision, what's possible for you, what's available to you, and then it's up to you to follow the breadcrumbs to get there because it is possible for you to get there. But if you start thinking now, oh, I need to write the book right now, or I need to start doing whatever it is right now, it will take you longer to get there.

It's up to you to follow the small little nudges that you've been led to.

I love that. What does it feel like to have this intuition? Do you feel like for people it's like a voice? Is it like a feeling?

For some people it's, they get visuals, more people. Get the feeling or a voice. This is the thing. A lot of people think that it has to come down like it's like God's voice coming down or spirit's voice, but it's typically in your own mind and that's why it's so difficult to discern from the ego or your higher self, cuz essentially it's in your own voice that you hear it in.

For me and from a lot of my clients, it's in your own voice and really to figure out which it is. It's about going back to that piece that your higher self speaks to you in a loving, compassionate manner. And only believes in love and abundance, and the ego is believing in fear and lack. So the way to decipher between your ego and your higher self is like, is this a fear-based thought?

Is this coming from lack or is this coming from love? Is this coming from my highest alignment?

Hmm. That's so good. Yeah, and sometimes it can be hard to figure that out.

Hmm.

Because the ego can be so strong.

Absolutely, because particularly when we're programmed to think, programmed by our ego, From such an early age, like we were all born intuitive and the conscious mind comes online about the age of seven and before that we were likely to be walking around chill with like as children, like just with so much awe, so much excitement about the universe, not believing in lack, not believing in limitations if, if a lot of people wanted something, they asked for it.

And I have some clients that even have come to me that. And one in particular that comes to mind is that her child remembered past lives. And that's what led her on her spiritual journey because her child was like, do you remember when I had three children? And she was like, oh my God, like what is this?

Like, is my child kind of crazy? And when she started looking into it, it's like, no, because when you're born, you're, the veil is much thinner. And children pick up things like most children are empathetic and most children, like my brother is. 11 years younger than me, and because I was like, Not a very unhappy person growing up.

Like he would sometimes come and hug me when I'd be at like my saddest, but nobody else had noticed anything going on, but he was sensitive to the fact that I was struggling. And that's the thing with children, we can see that a lot with them, that they're much more intuitive. And then when the conscious mind comes online, when the ego comes online, we start.

Thinking like, what does this person think of me? Is it okay for me to do this? We get told constantly, particularly as women, like to be the good girl. You know, be quiet, don't be too loud. All those things. And that causes blockages within our throat chakra. And our TRO chakra is about us being authentically ourselves.

So we place all these masks on ourselves and it's not possibly, it's not possible to live in an alignment and have a happy life when we've all these masks placed on ourselves.

Yeah, those masks get pretty heavy.

Yeah, for sure.

How do you feel like accessing your intuition and getting more in touch with this can help you become the one.

Ah, so much so I love this question because your intuition is leading you to what is right for you. Your soul has a blueprint and you have to do it your way. Nobody else. Can do it your way. And this is why sometimes when the intuition comes in that other people might tell you you're mad to do something because it might not be right for that other person.

It's what feels right to you. And your intuition will always guide you to what do I need? What does my body need right now? Do I need to meditate? Do I need to go to the gym? For me about becoming the one is about feeling full. When you feel full on the inside, things can manifest externally on the outside, and particularly as women.

When you think of our, our bodies like the women, our woman's body wants to be filled and the man's body wants to release. They want freedom. So when we think of we want to find love in our life, it's like it's already within you. Can you love on yourself? Some more. And your intuition is always gonna lead you to love on yourself some more because it's that gentle, kind, compassionate voice within you, telling you that you're amazing, telling you that you're good enough, telling you that you're powerful, telling you that you can create the reality you want.

And if you're telling yourself any other thoughts that is coming from your ego, that is not coming from your intuition, not coming from your higher self, your higher self and your intuition is always gonna be guiding you towards the best things for you.

Yeah. How does meditation support in this?

Ah. Meditation is so powerful in that there's so many different types of meditations you can do. You can do guided meditation, and particularly for me in my programs, I have a lot of guided meditations where. Some of them are like healings that it's like clearing things for people, but also there's the use of the affirmations helping you reprogram your mind when you're hearing it, when you're hearing good things said over and over again.

Repetition is key in any of these things, but meditation can also be really good if you're just listening to music, just accessing stillness, and that's when you're gonna get the guidance you're gonna get when you steal your mind. And meditation isn't about like never having a thought. We're all gonna have thoughts coming up in meditation.

It is a practice, it's a meditation practice because it's very difficult to get to that place of complete stillness, but when you practice it more and more, you can get into those states where you're getting guidance for. Where to lead you to love on yourself some more, and it could be so simple.

Sometimes we think that it has to be, oh my God, these crazy things that it has to be. But you might get a download and a meditation to simply get out in nature. You might get a download to eat better. You might get a download to do something nice for yourself. That is all about you filling yourself up, filling your own cup so that you can help other people and also see your external reality shift around you.

Hmm. Love that. I too, I love meditation. I meditate every day because it just is so great. And I feel like for me during that time, it's really about, I. Me just being with me, you know, and allowing like whatever needs to come up to come up. And I usually do it in the morning and so it helps me to just feel ready for the day.

I'm the same. I like doing it in the morning and yeah, exactly. It sets me up particularly for when the likes of you and I dealing with clients as well, like it's. So important to be full and to be coming to sessions with clients full. Like I will always say like, I can't. I can't. How can I give to anybody else if I can't give back to me?

You know, there's a lot going on in the energy at the moment of a lot of people having to choose themselves, and particularly those that are looking for love. This whole piece around choosing yourself, you have to choose yourself first. If you want somebody to choose you, you have to choose yourself first.

That is. So amazing. Yes, absolutely. You have to choose you. And even when you're in a relationship, you still have to choose you. You still have to prioritize yourself. And I feel like meditation is such a good way to do that. And I think that people have this idea on meditation that it's like sitting there cross-legged, you know, the, I don't know, like some, I don't know where we got this message from.

I feel like I've seen like a movie or something where someone is doing that. But actually, I mean, for me, like I do it very differently I think, than. Other people, right? Like we all have our own ways and like what feels good? Like sometimes I'm like laying down because I'm, I'm just tired, right? Or like I'm, there's specific meditations I like to do that are for different things, you know, like this morning I did one around just having a good day and like a new beginning.

And sometimes it's just like you're feeling a lot of anxiety and you want to be able to release that and process those emotions. So to me, I feel like you can use meditation for literally anything.

Yeah, I agree with you. I do my meditations lying down as well because. If you're gonna be there for a while, you may as well be comfy. But I would say to those people that are interested in trying meditation is not to go and do the 20 minute to 30 minute meditation. Like Start Small. Insight Timer is a great app that I started with and you can look up to, you can look up meditations, it's a free app.

You can look up meditations that are under five minutes long, like start there. Don't put yourself into something that's going to potentially be difficult for you. If you're not used to sitting in stillness. Start really small and you can build it up.

Absolutely. Yeah. A lot of people tell me when we talk about meditation or I suggest it to them, they're like, oh, I have trouble. Like, you know, I overthink a lot. I just feel like I won't be able to calm my mind, or I have trouble sitting still. And so I completely agree with that. Just starting with something really small and.

I love what you said before about like, it's okay to have thoughts. Like it's not like you're trying to eliminate thoughts in your mind. It's really just allowing whatever needs to happen, right? And coming back to that moment and, and it's okay. Especially if it is like your first time or even your hundredth time, and you have a lot going on.

It's normal. It's totally normal for you to have thoughts that come into your mind during meditation.

Completely. I like it. It's day dependent for me. Some days I can do a really good meditation where I'm like, wow, that was amazing. I was brought on all these adventures, and then other days I can come away and be like, okay. Today was my day. I, I did struggle with my thoughts. I would actually do, if I know going into it that I am gonna struggle with it, a lot of times I would pick breath work, I'd choose breath work because I'm focusing on my breath rather than trying to steal my mind.

Mm. Yeah. Yeah. Some days it's just not it.

Yeah, exactly. And that's okay. We have to start, like, choosing yourself is around being kinder to yourself. It's not about just like choosing yourself. Like I had a client the other day and it's like, I love getting my nails done, and she had hers done and they looked amazing, and I'm like, that's beautiful.

I love those aspects of self care where we can make ourselves feel beautiful. I love that as well. But choosing yourself goes deeper than that. Choosing yourself is about you choosing you first, that if the phone rings and you don't have the capacity to answer the phone to that person, you choose you, you choose that you will ring them back at a later time, but you choose, you.

You choose, you always, because you can't possibly have a decent conversation with somebody if you were not feeling at your fullest. It's just not possible. And as, as empaths for those listeners resonating as empaths. And I feel like a lot of your followers probably will. We can't keep outpouring, outpouring, outpouring.

You have to give back to yourself first if you want your external reality. Everything in your external reality is a direct reflection of what's going on internally. So if you wanna manifest the big love or any of your desires into your life, it starts from going within. It starts from filling your own cup first.

Yes, becoming the one.

Yes.

So let's move over to this fear of being alone because I think, you know, at least for me, when I was in relationships and particularly my past relationship, that was very serious that I was. I think subconsciously afraid of letting go because I was scared that I wouldn't find anybody else who could love me, who would want to be with me, who I would love back, and, and there's just a lot of fear, I think, for people around this, that, you know, if we let go of something or if this thing ends, that we're gonna be alone.

And sometimes our brain even goes like, we're gonna be alone forever. So talk to me about, Like your thoughts about that and how we can overcome this big fear that a lot of people have.

Absolutely. And before we get into that, I just feel like there's a message on becoming the one coming, coming through really strongly that I feel like some of your listeners need to hear. It's centered around the fact that we are all part of source. And Source is pure love. Therefore, you are pure love.

So anytime that you're searching for love, it means that you're actually searching for yourself. So it's really important for you to go back to that. Back to that sentiment that you are pure love, that love comes from within you. You are your own source of love. You're your own source of power. So this is why it's so important for you to give back to yourself.

It's because you are pure love. And I once heard somebody say about the son, like telling somebody to love themselves more. It's not possible. It's like telling the son to be more illuminating. It's not possible for the son to be more illuminating cuz it's just what it is and you are pure love. So it's like not about this, like, oh let's do all the self-love.

Like, like, it's like, no, it's what you are. So keep coming back to that truth because that is the truth of the universe. You are pure love. Okay, sorry. That wanted to come through strongly. On this perception of yes, it is so scary. It is so scary, so scary. And when I was that breakup, that was a catalyst to my growth, I definitely experienced not wanting to leave that situation, even though I wouldn't have said I was intuitive at the time.

However, I was having. Bad nightmares. My body was telling me he would have to wake me up. I'd be like screaming, crying, having dreams about people dying. It was like, but I still didn't associate it. Like with him. I was very unhappy because of the way he was treating me, and I accept my own responsibility in that I believe we all have to take responsibility and accountability within partnerships.

And I'm not saying it was the right way for for him to treat me, but I've worked through that. But. It was like I didn't feel like I could leave because I was thinking, well, we have the house together and we planned on getting married and like there was those fears in the background of me thinking if I leave, will I meet anybody else?

What about having children? All of those things, and it was so scary. And that's why when we did break up, it felt like my whole world had been pulled apart. And I believe that we attract clients who go through similar experiences. So I've navigated this with many clients as well, and particularly in energy readings.

I sometimes read people's energy and I, what I actually find is they're looking for timelines. I predict timelines with people. And sometimes when I'm tapping into a timeline to see when they're gonna meet their person. Sometimes if I don't see a timeline, their guides tell me. I can't give you a timeline because this person doesn't believe it's possible for them.

And if you don't believe it's possible for you, our thoughts create our reality and have a big part in us creating the reality. And with any of those people, it's not to say that they can't change their reality. Of course, we're always changing our own reality, but then it means that we need to do a little bit of belief work.

A little bit of belief work around thinking that you're gonna be alone forever. And another thing that I really see coming up strongly is sometimes people don't wanna actually admit that they wanna be with somebody because there's all this women in power and that's amazing. That's brilliant. But there's so many independent women out there that almost feel like it's negative to say that they want somebody.

They're searching for something and they feel bad, they almost feel bad. And once they actually come around to admitting that they do want somebody, I say, I say to them all the time, we're here for human connection. It's not wrong for you to want somebody, the universe wants you to have somebody if you desire, have a desire in your heart.

It's be there for a reason. And it really is about you acknowledging and knowing that you are seeking human connection and that is okay for you.

Yeah, I totally agree. I feel like for me, there was a point in time where I felt like it was almost bad to want a relationship, and it led me to feeling like I was just denying this part of myself and something that I really wanted. And it was almost like this battle actually inside of me where.

I feel like it was bad to want it, like I shouldn't want it. But then at the same time, I wanted it so badly it was this weird like paradox thing going on in inside. So if someone does feel like they can't, you know, call in a relationship or attract a relationship or find someone or like find this love, how do you help them to start to change these beliefs?

Well, it's actually interesting what was coming through when you were talking there. It was kind of like I teach PE people how to change their patterns as well as the beliefs as well. Because the way when you were speaking there, I was getting this vibe of, I've had a few clients, I'm not saying you personally, but it's just from my channel as open information just comes through and it's like go say about this.

But it's like this element of. A pattern. I see people having patterns playing out a pattern will play out over and over in your life, Sal Rhythm, until you learn the lesson. And I see with people ghosting a lot or getting rejected a lot, and people will say to me, what, like, why does this keep happening to me?

And it's generally, I think ghosting is down to you, not been, the person isn't able to communicate and therefore they're not able to be honest. And I will say to clients, Where are you not communicating with yourself? Where are you not being honest with yourself? And that thing that you were talking about, that duplicity of like, I want it, but I don't want it.

I want it, but I don't want it. And clients are like, but I would never not communicate with somebody. And I'm like, but you're not communicating to yourself your true heart desire and your heart desire. If you want to be in union with somebody, it is okay to admit that So. Admit that that is the first step.

The universe wants you to have your desires and anything that can exist does exist within your quantum field. So anybody that's struggling on clearing some of the limiting beliefs, open yourself up to the broader perspective of anything that can exist does exist. Everything is possible for you. There's infinite timelines, infinite possibilities.

So when we're getting to the core root of limiting beliefs for me, they tend to trace back to three different things. The beliefs of I'm not lovable, I'm not good enough, and I'm not worthy. And those things are stored when you have them for a long time, because typically they go back to childhood. And when you have those things within you for a long time, they're stored in your energy field and also stored within your body.

So there's different practices in which we can do to clear the matter. Your energetic. Field and also clear them outta your body as well.

Very cool. What are some of the things that you do with clients to help clear those?

Yeah, so I do a lot of energy healings and like I mentioned earlier, a lot of my meditations are healings within themselves as well.

Energy here, healings, I do a variety of them. It could be a connection to their inner child, which is so, so powerful, so powerful to stay connected with your inner child.

Your inner child is a world of information, and if you're struggling to attract somebody into your life, it's likely that your inner child is protecting you. I have so many people that come to me to say they want, they want their person. They want their person. And when I go in and I tap into their energy, I see their inner child and their heart that's blocking them.

Putting up these walls and it's energetic walls. So logically you might be saying to yourself, I want somebody, I want somebody. But if your inner child is terrified because of previous toxic relationships, previous situations, previous protecting from things going on in your childhood all the way up to your current daily life, your inner child could be protecting you.

When you start start forming a relationship with your inner child, it allows those energetic boundaries to come down. IDO healing's releasing former versions, which so many people are holding onto old versions of themselves, which is holding onto shame, holding onto guilt. Shame, and guilt is the lowest vibrational frequency, and it's not possible to call in your desires when you're vibrating at that place.

We attract somebody in our life based on our dominant vibration, and if we're vibrating at shame and guilt, yes, you can attract somebody in. You can always attract somebody into your life, but it's what vibration would you want to meet? Somebody that's vibrating, that's holding onto all that shame and guilt.

And with shame and guilt, it leads to a lot of self-hatred and a lot of anger for yourself. So there's so much power with releasing those things, and for me, a lot of it. It's so important that it's done energetically, cuz a lot of people almost get themselves into a shame cycle when they start beating themselves up, when they keep using their mind and beating themselves up.

For me, I got so much into the world of personal development and I, you know, can, I'm so good at identifying thoughts and analyzing my thoughts, but I was holding onto so much stuff energetically with moving things outta the body. It's about. I do emotional alchemy practices with clients, but I would always, for anybody listening, if they have anger within their body, like Move.

Your body doesn't need to be doing a workout. You can put on a song, a proper rag, Lincoln Park in the end, my favorite. Dance song like punch pillows, like get angry, scream, like let it out. It is not wrong. It goes back to that TRO tracker block of been told that like, be a good girl, be quiet. All these things like no anger is just an emotion.

And it's so important that if we have anger within the body, that we transmute it and we move it out through the body. And you can do that through dance. You can drew that through somatic embodiment practices, which are centered around a lot of dance. And I actually did, for anyone that's listening, I actually did ignite your power free activation on Sunday.

And the link is still on my Instagram if anybody wants to sign up for it, because it was a really, really powerful somatic piece of moving energy out of the body.

So good. That's so cool. Yeah, I'll definitely link all your stuff in the description so people can go check that out. And I love hearing all these different modalities because there's so many out there to. Be able to change your life and these are so powerful. One of my favorites is EFT tapping, and that completely transformed my life.

It's something that I use with clients and I always get the best feedback on it. They're like, this was so good. Like, can we do more? And they're like, yeah, because I and IAP almost every single day because I agree. Like you just need to move that energy around and let it out.

Yeah, I love EF T as well. Whenever I do it with clients, they say they feel so much lighter after it. I have so mo, so many modalities I could keep going. Past life healings are amazing, like they're so cool, particularly. For releasing soulmate connections, like there's just so many modalities and it's, it's so powerful.

And I think once you get into this world and you start tapping into it, there's just so much power and we don't need to do this all with our mind. We don't need to do it. We can hand some of it over to a greater force, a greater power, and there's so much magic in that. A lot of times we get stru like struggling.

Beating ourselves up over and over again. And even some of my forgiveness meditations in my programs, like I've had clients say that the, it's almost felt like they've had amnesia after it because they've just forgotten so much of the past that they've been beating themselves up for over and over again.

That, that must be very powerful then.

Energy is powerful.

Yeah, it it is. It really is. Yeah. I agree. So let's talk about finding your soulmate.

Hmm.

Okay. So this is such a good, a good topic to discuss because a lot of people feel like there's this one person that they are going to find and they have to search the whole world. I mean, even the language of like, you have to find this person.

Right, like the finding, it's like this, this hunt to find the one. And I know for myself, like I definitely thought there was just one person for a long time and I feel too, like there's messages, there's even a book. And actually recently I was watching Sex in the City. there was an episode where I think it was maybe Charlotte, and she was like, you only get three loves in your life.

You know? And it, it's so scary. There's so much fear. So I would love to hear your thoughts about soulmates. What do you think about them?

Oh my goodness. Love this topic. So a soulmate is somebody that we've done a past life with. It doesn't mean that you're meant to do this life with them or your entire life with them. There is more than one going back to the fact that the universe is abundant. So it doesn't have to be a person that you are intimately linked with, that you're, I'm a romantic partner.

It is so many people. It's that friend that you instantly connect with. It's your family members, particularly the family members that trigger the hell outta you. It is that person that you may see in the shop every day that just annoys you, bugs the crap outta you for no apparent reason. And yes, it is the people, a lot of clients as well.

Obviously when you've those solar line clients, it's so amazing, but when we mix sex and intimacy into it, it goes to deeper levels, obviously. And for me, it's really about finding a soul aligned person. Because like I mentioned earlier, anybody can meet anybody. I have had so many romantic soul connections and when I was with that person that I spoke about earlier, I thought he was my one because I did, even though I didn't think I was intuitive at the time, I did.

The first time I met him, I heard this is the person you're gonna marry. So that's why it met more di met. It more difficult for me to leave. The situation because I thought this was my one, and I kept holding onto that thing. I still remember the exact moment I heard that, and that made me feel like I can't leave this person because then there will be nobody else.

And for me since then, I have met so many soulmates, so many beautiful, beautiful men. And it can be extremely difficult to let them go, but they come into your life for a reason. And a lot of times that. Reason could be a lesson. They're there to teach you something there to teach you, to take up space there for you to break a pattern that's no longer serving you in your life.

Could be that it's time for you to take up space and start choosing you. So you experience all these lessons with these people, but it's so important to not cl on. It's so important to know that if something isn't right with that, with a soulmate. There is another one along the way, and it sounds very much like there's another bus coming.

I don't mean it like that. I've let go of some of my connections and it's been awfully painful. It really, really has. But I find that clients find it so so nice to know that there is somebody else along the way. The universe is abundant, and if it didn't work out with somebody, there's a reason why it didn't work out with somebody.

And I tend to find with clients, it's because their soul is calling them for somebody better. And it's not to disrespect anybody in the past, but the more work you do in yourself, you're raising your vibrational state and you will meet somebody that's more in alignment with, well, you're always meeting somebody at your vibrational state, but the more you pour into yourself and you raise your vibrational state, the better the person is gonna be.

I have a whole program attracted, and it's based around this, and it literally is my journey of how I went from attracting somebody with narcissistic tendencies to calling in beautiful soulmates, beautiful, beautiful men. And it is a journey. It doesn't just happen like I have. The whole journey of evolution in that program of the men getting better and better and better, and the best is yet to come.

Oh yes. I love that the best is yet to come. There's actually a song named that and I listen to it so often because you have to remind yourself of that. And you know, every person I've ever talked to and in my own life that when I ask them if their next, their partner, like their history, right? Like, did your partners get better with each person?

And they always say yes. And it's so interesting because we're always like, oh, you won't be able to find someone better. But it does. It always gets better. I mean, look at the history of your relationships. Like I know my first relationship was not anything like my last one. And like each person just gets better and better.

And that's because it's along your evolution and your growth.

Absolutely. And I see it happen for clients really quickly. I see them change the type of men they're calling in really, really quickly. And this is a thing with lacking limitations of the ego. It's always gonna have you thinking that, you know, there's not enough people. Where am I gonna find somebody? And one of my clients actually, after that program In her workplace.

Somebody came in to do a trade like that, had a contract in there and he asked her out on a date and they're dating now. And it's so beautiful because it's like coming from the perception of so many people are like, yeah, but I work here. I won't find them, but I won't find them there. I won't find them there.

And it's like you need to broaden up your horizons to thinking that you can find them any place. And this isn't an negate the fact that it can be extremely difficult to let go of a soul, make connection, but it is coming from that place of your soul. Knows that everything is unfolding perfectly. Your soul is always gonna guide you to better and better and better.

And to not underestimate the power in actually grieving somebody, but grieving with an open heart. Cuz I see a lot of people, and I've done it myself in the past when I've been grieving somebody, I. Closing off my heart, not wanting to get hurt again. And when we do that, the type of partner we call in, then risk.

We risk calling in somebody that's too safe, too nice. Because we place, again, the inner child puts this protection layer up and we can't call in great love into our life if we're not willing to be heartbroken along the way.

That's so true. That is so true. Really letting go of the, I guess it's like the attachment to the outcome. And of course like we can intend on, you know, like if you marry someone, of course you intend on, you know, potentially spending your life with them. But also it's like being okay with whatever happens, whatever needs to come.

Mm, absolutely. Because I find for so many of us, particularly women, and as we get older, I used to be very much like going on a first day. And like it gone well and nearly already picturing me walking up the aisle like already picturing these things. Like, and it's kind of like now with all I know now through myself, my own experiences and through clients' experiences, it's like, can you actually go and have fun?

Can you be open to the fact that this person. Whoever you go on a date with or whoever you're dating has come into your life for a reason and have a bit of fun with it. And also know that everything is a me projection of what's going on internally. So everything is marrying back something within you.

So if there is something that you like about a person, you're like, oh my God, that is within you too. That person is there for a lesson. And I actually remember at one point I was dating somebody and I, I would use this a lot, but I remember his reasoning for not wanting to see me anymore was he was starting a business and he didn't think he had time for the relationship as well.

And I remember thinking, who does he think he is? What's he talking about? And then I had to check on myself and I had to actually go, whoa. I actually am placing a limitation on myself. I keep on thinking that I have to choose to put a hundred percent into my energy into dating or a hundred percent my energy into the business.

And it's like, no, the universe wants you to have both. The universe wants you to have what you want. Like it's a co-creation process with the universe if you have a desire. The, the universe has the desire for it to be met as well. So it's like that roomy quote, what you seek is seeking you. And a lot of people come to me and they think they want the universe to magic up a person for them.

And it's not about managing that person up. Your person already exists out there in the world, and the quicker the way you will magnetize that person to you is the more you pour back into yourself.

Oh, so good. Yes, I completely agree with all of that. That is so juicy, so good. Because you have that desire for a reason. You want it for a reason, and if you're looking for it, then it is also looking for you.

Yeah, we didn't all have these. And I think pe I think people think that we all have the same desires, you know? And it, it's not true. It really, really isn't. We have different desires. You have a desire to have the podcast. I don't have a desire to have a podcast. I wanna be on podcast. You know, so it's like a lot of people think that like, oh, we all want the same things everybody wants, but it's so not true.

And the more you actually connect with yourself, and this is why meditation is so powerful, you connect into your heart space, get outta your mind, and you can start creating that space for you to be honest with your desires. And it's not wrong for you to want what you want. Sometimes people think that they've been too demanding when they have this list of this amazing person they want, and it's like, no, if you desire it, get honest and claim it for yourself.

Yeah. Well, thank you so much for coming on today and sharing all of this juiciness. I love this conversation. Where can my listeners find you at?

I hang out mostly on Instagram at the Reclaim Coach and my website is the reclaim coach.com.

Amazing. Well, thank you again.

Thank you so much for having me. It's been so amazing to talk to you.