Beyond Your Number
You're more than just a personality. Beyond Your Number is a conversational Enneagram podcast where Damon and Kelly dig into what makes people tick, and what to do with what you find.
We cover all 9 types, wings, subtypes, and motivations, and how they play out in real relationships, real teams, and real life. No jargon, no fluff.
New episodes every Wednesday. Formerly known as EnneagramU.
Beyond Your Number
Enneagram Compatibility: Exploring Types 1, 2, and 3 | PART 1
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This podcast episode discusses Enneagram relationship compatibility. Damon and Kelly, introduce the topic and explain their approach to categorizing compatibility between different Enneagram types. They cover compatibility for Enneagram types One, Two, and Three, noting which types are very compatible, which can be compatible with work, and which should be avoided unless both individuals are healthy. The hosts emphasize the importance of personal growth and health in all relationships. They decide to continue the discussion of the remaining Enneagram types in a future episode.
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Enneagram Relationship Compatibility
Speaker 1Welcome to Enneagram U with Damon and Kelly , where we explore the mysteries of human personality and help you learn more about you . Whether you're a skeptic or an enthusiast , together we'll take you on a journey of self-discovery using the ancient wisdom of the Enneagram . This is Enneagram U . Hey everyone , welcome to Enneagram U . My name is Damon . I'm here with my friend Kelly . Hi Kelly , hey Damon , kelly , I am so excited .
Speaker 2I'm on the edge of my seat about this episode , and you weren't five minutes ago .
Speaker 1No , you dropped the title on me or the subject , and I'm like I cannot wait .
Speaker 2I know it's going to be amazing .
Speaker 1I never thought we would take on this topic . I mean because it has been kind of taboo around the Enneagram world to take on this topic , because it's like , well , you don't want to put people in a box or you don't want to like ruffle any feathers here .
Speaker 2Well , we're going to ruffle .
Speaker 1I cannot , I , I'm so , I'm so excited . I'm going to let you say how you're feeling and tell everyone what we're going to be talking about .
Speaker 2But hurry up because we want to get on the edge of their seats like you , damon , I can't stand it .
Speaker 1This is going to be the if this is not the number one episode we've had . I am going to quit .
Speaker 2Okay , well , now my feeling is I feel pressured . No , don't feel pressure , please don't .
Speaker 1I'm excited .
Speaker 2Yes , I am excited too .
Speaker 1That's cool .
Speaker 2Yeah , I , uh , I'm excited just because it's been a great day and , yeah , this has been a topic that I've done some research on and I've just found enough data that I feel like it's okay to present .
Speaker 1I think you're the first person that is taking your courage , the courage you have .
Speaker 2We're going to blaze this trail as an ape Get going here . We're going to just move forward .
Speaker 1Everyone else is like well , we could , but no , maybe not . Okay , All right .
Speaker 2So you know , this year we've been talking about the Enneagram numbers and relationships , and so we are taking on the topic dun , dun , dun dun . Enneagram relationship compatibility .
Speaker 1I cannot believe it .
Speaker 2I'm sure people have tried this Well yes , but I think from this research and I have to agree just with , like knowing people and looking at different numbers and just putting it all together I feel like this is true . Now we're not going to say like , oh , you can't be in a relationship if you're these numbers . But what we're going to look at , we're going to break it down into three different categories . We're gonna look at each number and the very compatible . So these are the ones you want to be able to be in relationship with .
Speaker 1So these are the you know what's happening right now ? Everyone's pausing .
Speaker 2They're pausing , they're calling their friends , they're saying you have to they're pulling over , they're getting out their notebook Right .
Speaker 1They're like wait , stop . They're like I'm not in a place where I can listen to this and concentrate right now . So I got to get there .
Speaker 2Right .
Speaker 1Yes so .
Speaker 2I'm going to take a little work . You're going to have to be just aware of some of the pitfalls . But then we're going there , Damon .
Speaker 1Where .
Speaker 2We're going to say these are probably ones to really avoid , unless you're both really healthy or really willing to work , Kelly ?
Speaker 1what if people are already in a permanent relationship ?
Speaker 2I am there . Damon am there damon . Okay , this is why this is I'm there as a like you've heard from hartley , you know a couple weeks ago , and he and I is the seven and eight combo . What it is ? Uh , probably not encouraged . What , unless you're really healthy okay , there's the caveat . Well I mean , and I have to say , like we have been through the pitfalls and worked on our relationship , Okay , I like this .
Speaker 2So I'm saying that as someone who is in that probably third column I didn't do this research and go home and tell Hartley , sorry , we probably need to not be married anymore . Right , Right , right right , we just go into it going . Yeah , we have to be healthy . We have to work on ourselves and also know again , different isn't wrong .
Speaker 1Right , that's where we're going . Yeah , this is great . Yeah , it's going to be awesome .
Speaker 2So let's just start , as we do , with the one , of course , the good person . Any guesses on ?
Speaker 1Well , ok . So how are we going to do this ? First of all , you're going to start with the one and you're just going to put .
Speaker 2Well , actually I'll just say uh , you know , which do you think would be probably the most compatible ?
Speaker 2with the one or with the different numbers and then the other two obviously everyone knows I'm the wrong person to ask this , but let me give you a hint . Okay , so this is one for all the numbers that I find very interesting . So really , the not compatible every time is their same number . Uh , okay , so the one with the one is not going to be compatible , the two with the two . Okay , that eliminates one choice anyway , which I get , because the same numbers I mean can you imagine , especially in like your close personal , like even marriage relationship or significant other , the numbers with the same number .
Speaker 2It's just not going to be a good thing yeah , that's true .
Speaker 1If , if I'm a nine and if I was married to a nine , we wouldn't do anything . You wouldn't be in a relationship because who's going to make that second ?
Speaker 2you know , second attempt to reach out .
Speaker 1Yeah , we're not , that's it you never text back . This is so good . Find that person and you're just yeah . Well , unless it was an arranged marriage , there you go . You could arrange two nines to be together or an arranged relationship .
Speaker 2No , whatever , I guess . So okay , yes all right , so you're gonna ask me yeah , so for the one , what do you think would be the most compatible , or very compatible for a one ?
Speaker 1I need to do this fairly quickly because everybody I can hear the audience yelling out the numbers like , like on the prices , right $6.95 .
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah , exactly $1 .
Speaker 1Right , the one I would say least compatible , no , most compatible , oh , most compatible , most compatible Three .
Speaker 2You're right . Oh what ? Yes , you did it .
Speaker 1I need a sound effect .
Speaker 2I do . I need a sound effect .
Speaker 1I do . I need a sound effect , but I don't think I have one , and that would probably . Let's see here . Do I have a sound effect ?
Speaker 2Oh yeah .
Speaker 1Here we go . All right , there's a clapping .
Speaker 2I never use these , so the threes and the ones really make good relationships . Okay , because , as we know , the threes and ones , they do have a little bit of that similarity of wanting things to be perfect . They just go at it enough differently that they don't either have a competition for who's more perfect . So for like the three , as long as it looks perfect , that's good enough .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2And so for the one that works okay for them .
Speaker 1Okay .
Speaker 2Because they both have that desire .
Speaker 1I like that a lot . Yeah , okay , I like that a lot .
Speaker 2Yeah , so ones and threes , and then the other one that's very compatible with the one . Do you want to take a guess of that one ?
Speaker 1Very compatible with the one . Well , I'm married to a three and three likes the one , so maybe it's me .
Speaker 2Yeah , you're right . Okay , yeah , All right .
Speaker 1Look how good you are . Well , that's right .
Speaker 2So that , yes , the two most compatible with the one is the three and the nine . And again , a lot of times with the nine they have that one wing , and so that also helps them to be able to step into the one . But be enough different . The nine , as the peaceful person , tends to again be able to merge into the other numbers , but that nine in the one relationship tends to be a good one too .
Speaker 1That's a good one to start with , because my wife is a three , I'm a nine . Yes , close , not quite right , maybe . Well , we'll see . I mean , I guess we're not really , but she's , she's like when she's taking tests . She said she's like one point away from being a one right . So that means I could be in the very compatible area if she happens to be a one instead of a three , since it's so close for her .
Speaker 2yes , that's right's right yeah .
Speaker 1Man , I dodged a bullet on that one . I mean because we knew nothing about this stuff 36 years ago .
Speaker 2I know , I know Well , and and again . It doesn't mean that if you're in a relationship with someone that it means like watch out , but it just . Some relationships are just a lot more compatible than others . Others take a lot of work , and not that that's wrong , but you just got to know what you're getting into .
Speaker 1We want you to know that . I can't say we're not doctors because you are . You are , but we're not giving any advice here where you should act on it . No , yeah , but we are just informing you , yeah .
Speaker 2Just what the research would say .
Speaker 1That's right .
Speaker 2So the other column , for the one that we want to look at is that you can be compatible .
Speaker 1But let's do , let's do well , should we do a void first , or we definitely can ? I'm trying to decide which one would work better , because if we do , can be , would be everything else , everything else . Would that be better ?
Speaker 2yeah so let's do that last okay um , because otherwise you'll go around , and then you'll know right which one to avoid , so let's just go to avoid I don't have to guess it , you can just tell yes , okay , which one should avoid'm going to say seven yes , is that right ? No oh okay . Um , so the ones need to avoid again their own number ones , yeah , yeah Got that Also they don't have compatibility that well with fours .
Speaker 1Four , okay , yeah , um , and also eights Okay .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1And also eights , really , yes , okay , all right , and I think okay .
Speaker 2so for the four , a lot of times that one can go to the four and the seven in the arrows , and so a lot of times to go into health they go to the seven . So that's where they are a little more joyful .
Speaker 1Oh duh , yeah , yeah , yeah , okay .
Speaker 2But they can go to that dark side of the four in unhealth , and so I think that's where let's say if a one was wanting to just make things right or better , but a four is in maybe a dark place and deep emotions that four is not going to want the one to come in and try to fix them .
Speaker 1And that's going to frustrate the one .
Speaker 2And then the other thing for the one and the eight . Again , they're both wanting that sense of justice , but they go at it in different ways . So where the eight is very , maybe open and obvious with their social justice or working for the underdog very much like what you see is what you get . That may be a little too much for the one and again , they're just the similarities , unlike the one and three . Their similarities are going to lead to more friction . Wow , Okay , yes .
Speaker 1Man , this is okay . So watch out , this is too good this is too good and it's also like not advice . Yes , it's not advice . We're not judging .
Speaker 2No , no judgment . That's why I was so excited . Just to be aware I'm like I cannot believe you're going to do this . Okay , and again all of these numbers can be compatible if you're both working towards being healthy .
Speaker 1Really healthy , yes .
Speaker 2So I think about , like okay , one that we both know , kimberly Ernest , who's been on you know our podcast as the one she's here talking with us about money . I mean , she and I know each other and we get along very well , right , but you know , but it's one of those things that I think we both too , when we've worked together on things . I lean into her skill set of being very organized and kind of taking the lead with that and she leads into my skill set of more putting things together as far as information .
Speaker 1Right .
Speaker 2So I mean , we've worked very , very well together .
Speaker 1So you can be friends .
Speaker 2We can be friends .
Speaker 1But if you weren't healthy , you guys would be mortal enemies .
Speaker 2Or I know I've been in relationships with ones in the past that didn't have a long lasting friendship , because I think we just got to a place where , I don't know , it just felt like it imploded . Okay , yeah , all right , and then it's probably more of an unhealthy eighth .
Speaker 1Then it was like I'll just cut and go do something else Right , which is what I would do . Okay , do something else Right , which is what I would do .
Speaker 2Okay , yeah , awesome yeah , oh , this is so fun , I'm having so much fun right now . Good and so for the one then . So then they can be again very compatible if they , uh , you know , are in relationships with twos and fives and sixes , and we also said sevens . So again , that one , seven , uh connection would , I think , be uh , very again if you're both in a healthy space where the joyful person helps the one person , the number one person , be a little more laid back For the two . Being able to have somebody that you're in a relationship with , that's a helper , especially if that one has like a two wing .
Speaker 1Huh , this is yeah . I know a couple of friends that one's a one and one's a four .
Speaker 2Yes .
Speaker 1And they're very pretty good friends . But you know what ? They don't hang out all the time Right , it's just like the small now I know why .
Speaker 2Yes , I mean , it probably is because you need to be in small segments of time versus your close inner circle hang
Enneagram Two's Compatibility Potential
Speaker 2out all the time .
Speaker 1Do you think it would be the four or the one that would back out first ?
Speaker 2I think it's the four . I think it's the four too . Oh , and I don't even know anything about this , I'm just going . I know the person Well , it's a real life example .
Speaker 1It's really helpful when you can put that into play . Yeah , that makes so much sense .
Speaker 2Because , I think the one's going to be too much for the four , especially in trying to get them to . You know , get out of those darker moods . I don't think the one's going to have patience for the four .
Speaker 1Okay , this is overwhelming to me . It's so good .
Speaker 2Damon's mind is blown , it's blown and so much fun .
Speaker 1Yes , okay .
Speaker 2All right , so that's the one , the good person . Let's move to the two . I don't know if I can .
Speaker 1All right the loving person .
Speaker 2I don't know , that first one was so good , we can just stop there . Yes , now , some of these , I will say they're uh , some of them have uh , two numbers that they're very compatible with . Some have three , some , like the two , just have one that they're very compatible with .
Speaker 1Oh .
Speaker 2So again .
Speaker 1We need to have a . We won't do this everybody , but we need a PDF .
Speaker 2Yes , and it looks like you have a chart .
Speaker 1Yes , oh , you will have to reach out to us if you want this chart .
Speaker 2Yes , yes . I noticed there's a lot of yeah , yeah , it looks like on that chart .
Speaker 1Yeah , like , uh , yeah , I don't know what it looks like yeah , it looks like just a very detailed price is right . Actually , it looks like that it's like a game , like a checkerboard with the all the different squares , a game on the price , right ?
Speaker 2I can't really see it , though , which is , yeah , from a distance here , um , so all right . So , when you think about the two , is there one that stands out ?
Speaker 1to you that they would be , that you would think would be very compatible . Let's see , I can't . I know , I don't know , like the Enneagram is not in my blood , like it is in your blood , um , so it's harder for me . So I'm trying to think of twos that I know , and who they're married to .
Speaker 2Is that wrong ? No , especially if it's a good marriage . Yeah , yeah , yeah , for sure .
Speaker 1For sure . I don't know . I'd be guessing , but I'm going to say an eight .
Speaker 2You are right Again , damon , what it is in your blood , brother you are just three for three Wow .
Speaker 2That was such a guess , and again we can see the arrow again , with the two going to the eight in a healthy way , the eight goes to the two in a healthy way again too . And so I think a lot of times what makes a great two-eight combo is the eights are action-oriented and the twos love to help . I think about Carolyn , who was my assistant here at Woodcrest when I was on staff at Woodcrest and I was like here's the plan , and she was like how can I help ? Come alongside , and it was a great partnership .
Speaker 2Right , okay , and so you know , when you think about twos , you know again , they just want to be able to help , but sometimes they need that powerful person to you know . Give them , you know , just permission to jump aboard . And give them , you know just permission to jump aboard and and also the eights need the twos to let them know hey , you need to slow down a little bit .
Speaker 1Right , yeah , you're not thinking of people right now . No , you're not thinking of yourself .
Speaker 2You haven't eaten lunch or you haven't .
Speaker 1You're not very caring at all .
Speaker 2Awesome , yes , and so you know too , I think , in those personal relationships they can just be great partnerships , partnerships , you know , of just being able again that blending of action oriented and then heart oriented .
Speaker 1So , backing up here , you said two , and this is the only number for the two .
Speaker 2Only number for the two that they say are very compatible . Yeah , wow .
Speaker 1Okay , well that I mean . Now I feel kind of bad for the two . Why is that ? Well , because they don't have very many people that you know to choose from . That , their pool of people unless everyone's healthy , their pool of people for relationships goes down a little bit if they don't have more than one .
Speaker 2Yes , well , and this is the challenge for the two of having to be healthy enough to set those boundaries , because they're going to want to be really close with everybody , like for them . They don't want to just be on a surface level relationship , right ?
Speaker 1This is awful for the two because they're going to reach out and they're going to be , like you know , rejected and it's the wrong number . You're a seven I'm out . You're a six I'm out .
Speaker 2I can't be in a relationship . Yeah Well , hopefully this is freedom for the two as well . I love your positivity . Maybe I'm just spinning it . Am I just spinning it ? No , no , no , no , it's okay , it's good , it's good .
Speaker 1But yeah , it's only one number , though . The facts are the facts . There's only one here . That's on the first tier , right , and so , yeah , the two has to be . If you're a two , you need to get healthy now .
Speaker 2Yes , work on yourself pour into ones that they really have to watch for , that they're not compatible with , unless they are both really healthy . Well , and this also may cause some heartache for a two , there's actually four numbers .
Speaker 1See , I wasn't too far off on where this pattern was going . Okay , yes , okay .
Speaker 2So the ones that they need to just be aware of again , their own number two , but also not compatible , unless they're healthy , with a three .
Speaker 1Okay .
Speaker 2A seven and a nine .
Speaker 1What , what , yeah , I am such good . Wow , wait a second .
Speaker 2I'll think about that for a second . Yeah , process this for a moment .
Speaker 1Wow , yeah , yeah .
Speaker 2So think about you in a relationship with a two . What does that look ?
Speaker 1like yeah , yeah , it's just , twos are overwhelming .
Speaker 2Okay , yeah .
Speaker 1Because they're help . They help me help .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1But healthy twos are great .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 1But yeah , that's what I would say , cause we've talked about that before Like twos want to help . And then what can I do for you ? And here's this . And you're like no , I'm good .
Speaker 2And then they bring it to you .
Speaker 1Yeah , yes , so maybe that's where ?
Speaker 2yeah , I think that too , maybe with other numbers , cause they're probably not going to necessarily do that with an eight Cause they're going to push that a little bit more .
Speaker 2Maybe they can be a little more pushy with the nine or the seven , maybe two . I wonder for the seven , like it may be that , yeah , for the seven it may be that they're too much , because sevens are kind of like to be that lone ranger , they don't like to be put in a box , and so maybe for that relationship with the two , if they're not both healthy , it may feel like twos are trying to be controlling .
Speaker 1Okay , maybe a bit .
Speaker 2For the three . I wonder especially if that three is with a strong two wing , if maybe it feels like there's not enough room for both being helpers .
Speaker 1It's almost like its own number . Yeah , a little bit .
Speaker 2Because a two doesn't mind somebody else coming alongside to help , but they definitely don't want someone else coming in and taking over or not giving them anything , and so I think a three does it so efficiently that the two might feel like gosh , they just did all that and now there's nothing for me to do . So that may be where that breakdown comes in .
Speaker 1Okay , yeah , I can see that as well .
Enneagram Three Compatibility Pairings
Speaker 1All right .
Speaker 2Yeah , which leaves then they can be in a relationship with ones and fours and fives and sixes , okay . And so , like we said , with the one , that's true , the one and the two are together . So same is true , with the two and the one being able to have that compatibility , and then the one I'm sorry the two goes to the four in healthy ways , in that arrow , and so I think that can be a good balance , because a two will be that friend that'll show empathy to a four .
Speaker 1I think that would be a really good relationship . Yeah , yeah .
Speaker 2And then I think with the five I think you know again the two can go to that five and the harmony triad to be a little more contemplative , so thinking before you reach out to help somebody . So , again , being good listeners , they're going to have empathy for a five and know that a five needs some space . So I think that can be helpful for the five . And then the six . We know sixes and twos have a lot of similarities and can be just both very loyal , faithful , empathetic friends , and so I think a six and a two , if a six has a two friend and a two has a six friend , I think that can be a great combination too , Okay , All right .
Speaker 2So twos be , love you . It does not mean anything as far as rejecting you that you have more of watching out for some of the numbers and really compatible with only one . I hope that it does feel a little bit freeing .
Speaker 1Yeah , all I'll say is disclaimer . Yes , I'm just using that word , it's just over and over .
Speaker 2David's excited , but now he's also feeling a little fearful , I feel like a lawyer is going to call us Anyway .
Speaker 1Yeah , I get it , but I can also see some panic happening .
Speaker 2Well , again , just to broaden our awareness because , again , this is one of those things that we can learn to increase our emotional intelligence . That is the one area of intelligence we can grow in , and yet it's not always like , oh , it's a super fun growing process , it's something to recognize , like , okay , what are the things that I need to realize about myself and also in interacting with others ? So I think this podcast could be a little stretch zone for people .
Speaker 1For sure , my mind is blown . Yes , I'll tell you that it's great .
Speaker 2All right , moving to the next number , the three . Okay .
Speaker 1We kind of did this .
Speaker 2Are you feeling a little nervous , since your wife is a three ?
Speaker 1No , not at all . You're feeling Because of how healthy she is Right , do you hear ?
Speaker 2that honey . She can drag you along , no matter .
Speaker 1Did you hear that honey , who never listens to this podcast ? Ever ? I don't think she even the one she was on , I don't even think she listened to it because you know what . She's got a list to get through .
Speaker 2That's right , she's working . We haven't made the list yet .
Speaker 1I know we're not on her list . Well , I've been on her list .
Speaker 2Anyway , another topic , all right . So the three is the efficient effective person , and so they have three numbers that they're very compatible with .
Speaker 1Well , we've already kind of hit some of them by hitting the other numbers right , so one and nine .
Speaker 2Well , actually just the one .
Speaker 1Oh well , that's kind of a yeah half of a sad thing . So the one .
Speaker 2Yes , the one they're very compatible with , but there's two others .
Speaker 1Let's see here , but there's two others . Um , let's see here . No , I'm not . Who are her friends ? Eight man , eight . They're very similar to an eight .
Speaker 2So I'm not going to say eight .
Speaker 1I'm going to say seven and four .
Speaker 2Okay , you're close . Okay , it's seven and five . Oh , okay , seven and five , so you get a half a clap .
Speaker 1Nah , nah , nah . People are sick of that already . So seven and five .
Speaker 2Yes , so one , five and seven .
Speaker 1Okay .
Speaker 2Are who threes are really compatible with . Again , we talked about the one .
Speaker 1I'm not in this list .
Speaker 2I know Wait .
Speaker 1We haven't done the nine yet .
Speaker 2Oh , this is .
Speaker 1Wait , wait , wait , wait , wait . But like it has to go both ways , right .
Speaker 2Yes , it has to go both ways .
Speaker 1It's over , Honey . I'm so sorry . We have to end this podcast right now .
Speaker 2Damon needs to check into marriage counseling .
Speaker 1I've got some work to do . No wonder what a wonder Our marriage has been so hard all these years . I finally , oh poor .
Speaker 2Paula , okay , awesome so wow , this is that .
Speaker 1Yeah , no , I don't know . I'm not as excited about this podcast .
Speaker 2I mean , it is , you know , exciting , but also it's our stretch zone .
Speaker 1See what I was doing to everybody else just got done to me .
Speaker 2Yes , yeah , okay , no , all right , so you feel that yeah , but you know I'm very .
Speaker 1You know many people , many people , including myself , have said that they thought I was a one . Okay , Well however , they've also said my wife's almost a one , so that means there's no compatibility at all , whichever way you put it . Yeah , yeah , I don't even know I don't have a sound for this .
Speaker 2Damon has just dissociated into a happier time .
Speaker 2Yeah , yeah , yeah , okay , okay so like we said , the three and the one talked about that but the three and the five , and so I thought that was an interesting combination again because the three is very efficient and effective . But I think that combination is , if they have that , really that wisdom and discernment , or like this is our why that the five brings , that those two partnered together could actually get a lot done . So I think the five needs , like the three , to be able to partner with , just to be able to just be efficient and effective and I've kind of been like throwing this towards marriage relationships , but it's work relationships , it's friendships , it's all that stuff .
Speaker 1So I should have started the podcast with that .
Speaker 2It's okay .
Speaker 1But anyway , yeah . So you're on a project , you're a three , you're at work , you need somebody to work with . Maybe a five would be really good to get something done .
Speaker 2Right and where it's not necessarily like feeling for the five that they have to be . You know a perfectionist about it , you know , but also , I think , that sense of again , you know , so often with ideas or projects you've probably heard it said there's the wow and the how you know we talked about that with the sevens especially , and so I think for a three it would be like okay , wow , but the five might bring the how you know and they partner together on that , like okay , here's like the fundamentals of why we need to do what we need to do .
Speaker 2Okay , yeah , and then the three and the seven . I think that's also a very fun combination , too Interesting Again , that balance point of like a seven needs some efficiency and things , or else it's all just ideas .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2And so being able to put some of those things , to put some feet on those things as well , okay , yes , oh my gosh .
Speaker 1All , right , now check our time . Yes , okay , check our time . So we are about 26 minutes into this and we are at number three .
Speaker 2We're going to have to have part two . I know , oh my goodness , yeah , so there's going to be a part two . Part two , yes .
Speaker 1Let's do the oh wait we have to do . That's who they are compatible with .
Speaker 2Yes , but we have to do the ones that they're not .
Speaker 1Oh Lord , I don't want to know this , Okay .
Speaker 2Well , and so for the three , there are actually five numbers .
Speaker 1I don't want to know this . All right , go ahead .
Speaker 2Oh , damon is sweating . So of course the three , but also the two , the four , okay , dodging a bullet the six still dodging a bullet .
Speaker 1And the eight ?
Speaker 2Oh good , okay , so they are yes , they are , and they can be very compatible with the nine , which would be you .
Speaker 1It's possible .
Speaker 2Yes , it's possible with hard work , Damon .
Speaker 1I mean come on , nines and hard work , get off the couch . I mean , do the dishes .
Speaker 2This is all Paula's asking from you .
Speaker 1Okay , you're right . Two things , you're right . She's asking , but with ?
Speaker 2these other numbers . So we talked about the two and the three . When we talked about the two , also the four . I think for the four , again , they're going to be authentic , they're going to go at their own pace . And I think for a three , that can just they can have impatience with that . Also , threes try to reduce their anxiety by performing or producing . And a four that can be just inauthentic for them . And then for the six , I think again , if the three and six that arrow , if the three is going to that six that can go in unhealth at times you know where , then they can be more fear-based . So anxiety and fear .
Speaker 2I remember Lauren talking about that like for her , as a six going to the three you know in health , of being very efficient . Um , or it can also be like . I've got to perform to . Um , really , you know , uh , you know who I am is what I do kind of thing . Okay , yeah , and then I think the three and the eight , uh , a lot of times they have a lot of similarities as well . Um , but I think to uh again too much , too much alike can be too much .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , well . Well , you and my wife are not really friends at all but you're both healthy , just kidding .
Speaker 2So that's why we're just .
Speaker 1You know the best of friends , yeah but you know , you do , you guys hang out but you don't hang out tons right , right . Well , we're both so busy . Well , that's it . You know you guys get along so well so I'm kind of surprised that's in there . But again I do see that there are similarities and yeah , yeah , so I can see how that may not be like the person you want to be with , like all the time .
Speaker 1Right , so unless you're both healthy , that was the first note that I made on my card is all this doesn't matter if you're really healthy .
Speaker 2Yes , well , and again , even we could say in conflict with relationships . So often , if conflict is something we can walk through together in friendships , but in relationships and work relationships too , in marriage of course , but if we're handling that conflict in a healthy way . We don't want to be in that unhealthy or average space we want to try to be healthy processing our feelings , so that it doesn't just implode a relationship .
Speaker 1Okay , so that doesn't leave very many numbers here .
Speaker 2It only leaves one Damon .
Speaker 1Which one is it ? It's the nine .
Speaker 2It's the nine . It's possible . It is , you can be compatible . It's possible .
Speaker 1Second level it's not going to be easy . Yeah , that's right . But , I think I'll take it at this point .
Speaker 2Oh well , I mean , you guys have been married 35 years , Well , but that doesn't mean it was always like you know unicorns and rainbows .
Speaker 1No , it is now . It is now for sure .
Speaker 2I mean because you guys have worked on it . Yeah , and you're healthy . Yeah , and you're getting healthier every week , oh boy .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's true , wow . Well , this has been a fabulous episode and I think we just need to cut it right there , and we will see you in part two of . Enneagram compatibility in relationships .
Speaker 2Invite your friends to .
Speaker 1Yeah , tell everyone tell everyone about it . We'll see you next week . Bye Kelly , bye Damon .
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