This Golden Hour

87. Intuitive Homeschooling with Amie Bowden

• Timothy Eaton

Share episode

In today’s episode, we get to spend time with Amie Bowden, a homeschooling mother of six children from Cranbrook, British Columbia. Amie discusses her family's active lifestyle, her children's varying educational needs, and the different learning approaches they have adopted over the years. We explore the broader implications of homeschooling, including the importance of developing a child's character and the flexible, intuitive approach Amie employs. The episode provides valuable insights for parents considering homeschooling, emphasizing the significance of self-care for homeschool parents and maintaining a balance between nurturing children and personal development.

Resources
Teaching Textbooks
History Plus
Tuttle Twins


This Golden Hour
Free eBook Course
thisgoldenhour.org

Amie Bowden:

the other thing is recognizing like along those lines is this is such a short time. And so to just get as much of it as you can our kids are in our lives as children for such a short time. And so for me, like homeschooling has been such a blessing to maximize that time with them.

Timmy Eaton:

Hi, I'm Timmy Eaton, homeschool father of six and doctor of education. We've been homeschooling for more than 15 years and have watched our children go from birth to university successfully and completely without the school system. Homeschooling has grown tremendously in recent years and tons of parents are becoming interested in trying it out. But people have questions and concerns and misconceptions and lack the confidence to get started. New and seasoned homeschoolers are looking for more knowledge and peace and assurance to continue homeschooling. The guests and discussions on this podcast will empower anyone thinking of homeschooling to bring their kids home and start homeschooling. And homeschoolers at all stages of the journey will get what they need and want from these conversations. Thank you for joining us today and enjoy this episode of this Golden Hour Podcast as you exercise, drive, clean, or just chill. You're listening to this Golden Hour podcast. In today's episode, we get to spend time with Amy Bowden, a homeschooling mother of six children from Cranbrook, British Columbia. Amy discusses her family's active lifestyle, her children's varying educational needs, and the different learning approaches they have adopted over the years. We explore the broader implications of homeschooling, including the importance of developing a child's character and the flexible, intuitive approach that Amy employs. The episode provides valuable insight. parents considering homeschooling, emphasizing the significance of self care for homeschool parents and maintaining a balance between nurturing children and personal development. Welcome back to this golden hour podcast. We are really excited to have with us. Amy Bowden from Cranbrook, BC. Thank you for being with us, Amy. You're

Amie Bowden:

welcome.

Timmy Eaton:

Appreciate that. I know Amy's brother and we were talking one day and he said, you got to call my sister. She's homeschooled before. This happens so often where I call somebody and they're just like totally willing to do it. And so thank you for being willing to hang out for a little bit.

Amie Bowden:

Thank you for accepting that. Even knowing my brother, like that would have been

Timmy Eaton:

hopefully he hears this. So Amy is a homeschool mother of six and had her own journey in that effort. And so I'm excited to hear how you describe that. And then we'll just let the conversation go organically and see where it leads, but maybe tell people just a bit about you and And then weave that into homeschooling and then we'll ask some questions.

Amie Bowden:

Okay. So yeah, as Tim said, I've got six kids. My oldest being a girl is 22. My youngest also being a girl is 10 and then four boys in between there.

Timmy Eaton:

Oh, no way.

Amie Bowden:

And yeah, it's a nice girl sandwich. So we're fairly testosterone dominant around here. And the nice thing about. Having kids is once you have one and you've got them all figured out and they all come in exactly the same. So

Timmy Eaton:

totally said, no, so easy.

Amie Bowden:

So yeah, we're a fairly active family. Traveling is really important and exploring. And we do a lot of hiking and camping and. We own a climbing wall in town. So our kids are really into climbing. I instruct yoga as well and do some, a few different like mobility movement classes. So being active is a pretty big part of our family's culture. And we. I like to have a good time and don't take life too seriously. I don't color in the lines very well, and I don't read instructions very well. And that's how I've lived my life.

Timmy Eaton:

That sounds pretty par for the course for we homeschool families. One thing I always talk about with families which is interesting to me that people and myself included don't think of this just common sense, but just to think of what is your purpose as a family? And then I like how you guys seem like you've done that naturally. That we'll learn more as we talk, but that you just right off the bat said like something that defines you is that you like to be active and explorative and travel and that kind of thing. And I think that's so crucial because. So many families keep themselves within a box unnecessarily when there's so many options, especially now to do life how you want. And and why, why stay within the restraints that, that exists but tell us how you got into what was the first exposure to homeschooling and how did you get into it?

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, so as you sent some questions, this is the first time I've really thought about it, and I think the very first exposure I had to even this idea of homeschooling was when my oldest was just a baby, and we lived up in Edmonton, and because we were so poor, they pretty much they gave us a YMCA membership and, when they looked at our finances, they're like, are you okay? Do you need more than just this free membership? As it goes. Anyways, so I was like, avidly going to the YMCA a lot and there was an instructor there who I noticed she was really fit and had a great personality, and she had four little kids that she was homeschooling. And so she would have them come, and they'd be in the library part, they'd be doing their lessons, and she'd teach her class, and then she'd go get them. And I just thought that was so interesting, because up till then, I thought, in order to homeschool, you needed to Full legs, denim jumper and the French braid. And yeah, there's nothing wrong with that. That's probably more how I look these days more than ever. But just seeing that's exactly what you're saying. You can think outside the box and you can still be, an interesting extroverted, person. That's a part of society and do this. So that was my first real exposure and it just got me thinking. And then as. Esther is my oldest as she got older. I just, Oh, it's just, it's sad to see them go. So I did put her in kindergarten and then the year of grade one, we were moving right at the beginning of the year. And we were in this transition time, which we tend to be a lot. And so I ended up just doing a couple months of homeschool with her in grade one until we settled in BC and it was just like a, grade one, it's You could do whatever. And then put her back in public school and, when you have kids so close, it's just par for the course, like what you do with one and do with the rest. And then a few years later, my husband went back and did another medical residency. So we ended up moving to Vancouver for a year and I just felt really strongly that I was not prepared to put them in public school there. I didn't know a soul in Vancouver. I didn't know. Anything about the schools. I just wanted them close,

Timmy Eaton:

because Esther would have only been grade two at that point.

Amie Bowden:

I think it was grade three by that point. Yeah. So she was grade three. Ezra was grade one. Moses was, He would have been kindergarten. So at that time I had four, kids, kind of grade three down to a baby. And so that was a very interesting year. I had a homeschool mom that I'd connected with that was like, homeschooling is pretty much the shortest road to insanity and very true. But yeah, that's a whole nother story there with that experience living in the city. And then I continued for another year after that, and then we moved back. But by then I was due with my fifth, and my husband pulled the plug. He's no, no more, you can't do this. They're going back to school. So then they went back. And then remember that strange and wild time where the whole world shut down, that really happened? Or did I just imagine that? So strange. So it was just reset for everyone. So everyone in the entire world was homeschooling. So that was my third experience with that. And then my son Ezra, the second one, he ended up continuing for another semester after that at home. Schooling, like after everyone was back. Yeah. And then my fourth experience with it was, my youngest two were in grade one and grade three. And so my second to youngest child, Abram, he's got some different learning disabilities and, things have just been more challenging for him. And when he was kindergarten age I was not planning on putting him in kindergarten. I hadn't even mentioned it. And end of August rolled around, he got this letter in the mail that was like, Hi, Abram. I'm Mrs. Whatever it is. I'm going to be your kindergarten teacher. I'm so excited to see you in a few weeks. Yeah. I'm going to school? I was like, ugh, you don't even know how to wipe your own bum yet. I don't think I can send you. But anyways, he went and just, as a parent, you just intuitively know, and I was like I'll ride this out, but I don't think this is going to work for him, and I just had this strong feeling that by grade three, it's no longer going to work for him, kindergarten, grade one, grade two, everyone's pretty much the same, but grade three, you start to see differences, and sure enough, like clockwork, it became very apparent how much more challenging it was for him. And he's a very submissive, quiet kid. So I knew he was just going to fall between the cracks. Like teachers wouldn't even know how much he was struggling. And so I just, this is it. This is it. And I just pulled him out and Ruth, she's the youngest, she's like an incredibly social creature. She was doing fantastic, but I just knew to do my best I had to have them both out. Because I couldn't be involved in an elementary school and be homeschooling. That's, that leads us up to now Ruth did go back into, she actually went to a Catholic school, so she's a little Catholic school girl now, so she's back in school, so I just have Abram home now. So it's just been, yeah, we've ran the gambit of all the different.

Timmy Eaton:

I can definitely say I haven't heard like that, matched situation. And so that's unique. I like to hear that. So when you say it became really apparent, like when you were talking about Abram like what was it you said you just knew you're a kid obviously, but like intuitively you, you were anticipating it like, and what was it that was like, okay,

Amie Bowden:

I think socially, he struggled a lot more, and, you have six kids as well, so you realize it's not your first rodeo, you can, you're no dummy you, you know when something's different, and, just my other kids they, like Moses, he's the third. I taught him how to read when he was four. So he was fully reading by the time he got to kindergarten, and it was just a very simple thing for him. And with Abram, he was, it was just a real struggle for him. And he'd been born with a few different things. He was born with a, Submucal cleft palate so his palate wasn't totally formed and that caused some health issues for him He's actually deaf for a year and a half without us even realizing it and so developmentally it put him behind and then Speech wise it's been very challenging for him. And I just knew that there's not room in the school system for kids like that. And I started the process of having him tested so he at least could get a name, like a diagnosis, so there could be the assistance for him. And because things are so limited, I don't know what the situation is in B. C. compared to Alberta, but here in B. C. We would have been on a wait list for probably three years before he would have gotten in. So we decided to pay privately, so we paid 2, 500, took him to Calgary, he spent two days, going through all this testing. So he got his Whatever designation, even with the designation he got. So it was dyslexia and ADD um, and a few other things. He, it amounted to about 15 minutes, one on one time a week in the school system. That's the only assistance he would get. And so I just, you know, I you, you know, like, it's just going to get harder. It's just going to get worse. And he needs someone there scribing for him and he's not the hyperactive type, and I could see it in him, him just getting like more self deprecating and just like heavier and the days were harder and harder going to school.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah. No that's hard. And it's it's an understatement to say that like the school itself is not equipped for that. But then just the. The natural challenges of, like you said, of peers and other things that might accompany that would just be, that'd be heavy. So I can see what you're saying as a mom, you're going, yeah, it was, it became quite apparent.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah.

Timmy Eaton:

How's it been?

Amie Bowden:

It has been so great. It's I want to flip around and show you him right now. He's cause we got a big dump of snow. So he's just

Timmy Eaton:

in

Amie Bowden:

our yard. He wrote this big thing this morning in the snow. Hi mom. And it's just, he can be himself and it's been a lot of fun, like I've absolutely loved it. And I've seen him grow in ways that he wouldn't have been able to in the school system. Yeah,

Timmy Eaton:

and it's sometimes sad to think of people that, that are really in a situation where they can't do that or don't know that they can do that. Like that, I think that's probably actually more common in my experience. People just don't know. They don't know the option. They don't know, or they don't have the resources or the ability to learn like what you can do with those alternatives. And so what we do is we just keep studying. Keep going with it. And it's not awesome. And that's sad. That's

Amie Bowden:

really sad. And I do like I do have to say I feel like I speak from a place of privilege that I'm able to do this. I'm not I don't need to be out in the workforce. So I just my heart goes out to those parents that You know, we're struggling to just make it through financially and can't stay home with our kids. That's really difficult and real challenging.

Timmy Eaton:

It is. And that's something that as I've done these interviews and as I've read, and I think I mentioned to you that I did I did a dissertation on home education and I just, I've thought about it so much about cause I don't want to cave into that idea. I know that you have to have a good plan. You can't just be like, Oh no, anybody can do it. But I do want to just be like, no there's gotta be a way either through family resources. It can't be much worse than what goes on in the schools. In my opinion. Like I, for, especially for individuals that do require. Extra attention. And because the attention they need is from their mom and their dad and from somebody who loves them because teachers are awesome, but they don't have the capacity with a room full of kids to give them the needed attention, it's not reasonable to think that they could do that. I'm glad to hear that's going well. So describe like a. Just like a common day or just, or just what do you guys do?

Amie Bowden:

He's this kid has the gift of being able to sleep in. So left his own devices. He'd be in bed till, 10, 11 o'clock every morning. But I I take advantage of that, and I'm our one son's in early morning religious class, I'm often doing the early morning drive ins, so I'll drive him in, and then I'll head to the gym, and two of the mornings I teach a class at the gym. I'm able to still do what I need to do, and then be back by 9. 30, 10 o'clock, and by then he has his list of things he's got to do, he's got to go. Eat and water the chickens and ducks who take the dog for a walk. He's got to put pants on. That's one of the rules. You've

Timmy Eaton:

got to wear

Amie Bowden:

pants. And make his breakfast and do his morning chore. And He's a kid that he needs to have it like laid out. Okay. Okay. Yeah this and I've you know numbered off on his fingers Okay, you've got five things you need to do. Yeah And we cover the the basics He's got a really great online math program because we found that he does very well with the computer.

Timmy Eaton:

What do you do?

Amie Bowden:

He is in teaching textbooks.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah, we did that too for a long time. We really liked that.

Amie Bowden:

It's perfect for him. It's just his speed. It's, yeah, it works. And we've tried so many different ones for him. And then he really loves history. So we've gone down the rabbit hole with Greek history and Roman history and Egyptian history, and YouTube is our best friend. Are

Timmy Eaton:

you are you familiar with history plus history alive?

Amie Bowden:

No.

Timmy Eaton:

Oh, I would definitely highly recommend it. It's this guy, Daniel Allers from Alberta. He's actually one of my interviews. You could listen to it. Daniel Allers. Like he's won so many awards and going to the U S and all over the world for his curriculum. But he actually goes to places in person and he'll do these like history things with his brother. And anyway, just look it up. You'll love it. He's

Amie Bowden:

Daniel Allers,

Timmy Eaton:

A L L E R S Daniel Allers. It's called history plus now used to be called history live. A lot of people that follow him, know it as that but he's doing more now, but he goes around the world, but he's in central Alberta and And he goes all over the place, but he's brilliant. He's so good with kids. And anyway our kids love him.

Amie Bowden:

And then

Timmy Eaton:

I don't know if you do tuttle twins, but

Amie Bowden:

no.

Timmy Eaton:

Oh, that's another one. That's just so good. And Tuttle twins is that one's huge now. Like it's grown like a ton in the last couple of few years. But anyway, so a couple of things you might like, and can you like detect the difference in him compared to what he was doing and then what he's like at home?

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, it's. When they're that age, they change so much within three years. And for him, they'll always be I shouldn't say that. I shouldn't limit him. You never know what'll happen. But as of right now, social situations are still very stressful for him. And he gravitates towards adults. Yeah. And so once he gets someone's ear, my goodness, he's going to just talk you to death. I

Timmy Eaton:

love it. I love it.

Amie Bowden:

But yeah, he's definitely, he's so happy being home and that's yeah. Not having to go through that fight, starting your day off with so much anxiety, I think it was just like devastating to him. It'd be so hard sending them out the door. Yeah. One thing that's funny, cause he's medicated for ADD and. I'd love to not take that medication route, I'm medicated too. We do what we need to do to get through. And on days where we, he doesn't get his pill, you can definitely tell. And it's just today we're hiking. Like today we will be spending the entire day outside because it's the right off as far as sitting down and actually learning from a

Timmy Eaton:

and isn't it awesome that you have that option

Amie Bowden:

is totally, yes, again, I feel so privileged

Timmy Eaton:

and do you, I'm gathering from what you've said at the beginning of just your personality. I'm gathering that doesn't cost you much. It's not like you're going you're not humming and honking. You're just like, dude, we're going.

Amie Bowden:

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Great. I don't have to sit and fall asleep.

Timmy Eaton:

And, you started off describing like your day with him, his chores. And I haven't conducted the research myself, but I've read about the factor for like success in post secondary is did you have a consistent chore? It's just crazy to me that, that of all the things that they measure. It was like, did your kid have a consistent chore that they did well and that they performed well? I grew up in the kind of family and I know this is common where you had a wheel chart or wheel or whatever. And like you would rotate through your chores and then, a lot of people have changed that and been like no. Do one chore throughout your childhood that you just are amazing at. And and I don't know if it has to be one, but I'm just saying the idea of going deep and learning something like very well so that you become totally adept and they say that kind of translates into more. Of a successful, measurement, but I don't know but it makes sense. And that's how we do it with our kids. Like our daughter she does the dishes and our other daughter does the chickens, like you said. And then on Saturdays we do whatever, but. Anyway, so much emphasis on chores and tasks and being able to do something really well and go deep. So that's been good. So my goal

Amie Bowden:

is that they're going to be good roommates and good spouses like that. I don't want a spouse calling me and be like, you didn't teach your son how to clean the toilet.

Timmy Eaton:

I know. I know. That's so true. And that, and it's so common. That's one thing that I am very grateful that Sarah and I share is that one of our highest values is having a pretty clean home. We have two kids serving missions right now and they both comment on that a lot. And so I like that.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, they didn't like it and they're a part of it. But when you see what happens on the other side. Yeah.

Timmy Eaton:

Now that they're on their own, they appreciate it. And they, and then they're the ones doing it now. So that's, what's funny. But I was going to ask you like, so where, what have you done as far as, just finding material and curriculum and like, how have you gone about that? What have you done to glean information and kind of implement stuff into your homeschooling situation?

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, I think you nailed it right on the head as I am very like, okay let's try this. And if it doesn't work, let's try something different. And it's all about for me, it's definitely word of mouth. Like when I hear something that's good, let's try that out. And, yeah, so it's me. I'm very much trial and error. And if it's not working, we're going to let it go and try something else. In that. One year that I was in Vancouver, because I had three kids in school and then one baby and my husband was working like 36 hour shifts and then he'd be home for six hours to sleep and then back on the train back and so he, I, and we had no family, like zero support. I did white knuckle my way through it. Like I had everything written out, like To the 15 minute mark. And I was like, so rigid, but that was

Timmy Eaton:

probably like the worst time to be doing that too.

Amie Bowden:

Totally. Like I was so rigid. I was ready to snap at all times. And I felt like it was just like the, the structure that was getting me through. But then once I learned how to like, let that go and realizing it's going to be okay. Even if they don't get this math lesson or this thing in history or whatever, they'll, they're just learning how to learn at this point. There's nothing crucial that'll be like, they get to third year university and they're like, you didn't learn that in grade four, you're a failure in life.

Timmy Eaton:

Isn't that funny though, that's so true? Like, And I'm totally the person that it's my wife that's helped me to see differently, but I'm like that where it's we don't even stop to go. Okay. Why are we stressing so much about this? And then when I did formal research on it and to see that grades weren't even that crazy of an indication of how people are performing in post secondary. I'm like, wait a minute, all this stress on grades, like it, to me, that was a discovery that I want to tell everybody. Not that I'm even like, like I'm so opposed to testing or grades or something like that, but this, that there, I just know how much stress that kids go under, regarding grades and unnecessarily, and so I wish parents would stop and just go. Oh yeah. Like, why do I care that much? And yeah, you want to teach your kids to be diligent and you want them to finish things, carry things out to what degree and at what cost.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah. What's the purpose of it really comes down to. And that's one thing that I've completely done away with Abram is he doesn't receive a grade at all. And it's just every now and then, and it's all for him, it's all vocal. So very little well, he actually write down himself. But just knowing that he's gotten that information, but also learn how to process it. And

Timmy Eaton:

yeah,

Amie Bowden:

I learned

Timmy Eaton:

And I don't know if you and your husband are just comfortable are you guys just comfortable with? What's what they actually need to be successful adults like or what is it? Because some people are like, if they heard that, they'd be like getting anxious and going, wait, whoa, dude what do you do then? Because if they don't have their certain math score or this or that, then how are they going to go to the right University and get into the right med school and whatever it is are you guys actually chill about that? Or how do you guys approach that? And I know each kid is different, but I'm saying feel that how you will.

Amie Bowden:

And I don't know if it's a package deal, even for my husband and I, we see it very differently. Yeah. We're very much East and West, him and I. Cause he, academically, he, Checked all the boxes. He like school was very easy for him and he, jumped through the hoops and did what he needed to do. And it just it came easy for him. Whereas for me, school was extremely challenging, extremely stressful. And I feel like I've bluffed my way through all of high school from how, yeah, somehow past high school. But then once I got into college and I was doing something I loved and I saw the application of it, it was just. It was so much easier. And so I think that for me, that's more essential, is they'll figure it out eventually. And I, I feel like you're validating this, when they need to learn something, they'll learn it. And yeah, especially with Abram, he's taught me that things aren't going to look the, traditional way for him. And I just need to trust that process.

Timmy Eaton:

And like we said earlier, that's why you really do have to take time as parents and go, wait what is this all about for me? Because if it's about like grades, then fine, carry on. But if it's about just developing and cultivating a human and their character and I'm not saying you have to have one without the other, they're not exclusive but or mutually exclusive, but if that is your highest priority then you know what to say no to, and you know what to say yes to, you know what to actually stress about and what not to stress about. And that's huge. Especially for a principal home education mom cause then you go like one thing that we're facing right now. And I talk about this often on the episodes is just like the implications of having our kids in school sports. Most of our kids have done school sports and we're seeing some things that were like, Oh man, if we could go back, I don't know that we would do that. Honestly and both of us were into sports and high school and stuff, but it's to what end and at what cost same questions. And and now we're in deep enough that it's it's hard to backpedal out But again, it's like, who cares? Like high school is that big of a deal. And anyway, but it is to them. And that's what's, that's what makes it a challenge.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah. In the same vein of this, of, agendas and what's. You know what's really important. That was one thing that really solidified for me pulling my kids out of the public school system. This last time was again, I'm not sure how it compares BC to Alberta, but BC are so open minded here. Our brains are falling out like it's just so ridiculously liberal that these agendas are being pushed as far as you know what I'm talking about. And I was like I do not need. My third, like third grader being taught about gender fluidity. But the thing is, it all depends on the teacher.

Timmy Eaton:

So it's

Amie Bowden:

it's what the teacher's agenda is. And how they're going to push it. I had,

Timmy Eaton:

how did the kids deal with that? Like, I mean,

Amie Bowden:

This is it. They're not equipped to deal with this. And you wouldn't be teaching a student at that age, in depth sexuality. So why would we introduce these things at that age when they can't even comprehend it? And so that was another thing that really validated to me. Okay, we are done with public school. We're not going to. Play this game anymore because it's not like there's already so much going on,

Timmy Eaton:

That's why we've seen the jump since COVID, that you mentioned, that so many have elected to do this, because it's like, it was the perfect opportunity to say we're doing this our way now

Amie Bowden:

and yeah, again, like something you said just a moment ago was we just need to teach our children to be good human beings. And accepting all and loving all and being able to work with everyone, but it doesn't mean you have to accept a certain rhetoric or drink a certain Kool Aid.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah. So true. Did you have anybody like over the years, have you had like particular mentors that are in your mind that you're like, Oh no, this person, like you mentioned that person in Vancouver. And I don't know if that was more of a help or a hindrance or whatever but have you had somebody like a mom that was right above you or something or Like with their children, that's how we found that helpful. Like somebody who's a stage ahead of us, that's been so helpful to glean from their wisdom. But where have you gone for information and mentorship?

Amie Bowden:

No I think I just missed that as far as Like when I was, we were in Vancouver, we had a really great homeschool, like there was this club. Yeah. Well, It was like a place that we went to. Yeah. And like the art classes and the gym classes were together there and I was so fantastic. But then when I moved back to Crown Brook, there wasn't a homeschool community really yet. Like I was just ahead of it just by a few years. So I haven't really liked to be perfectly honest. It's, And that would have been nice, but knowing me, I don't really take advice well anyways, so I would have done it my own way, regardless.

Timmy Eaton:

That's been our style too co ops have been around, but we spend a lot of time in Edmonton and then down here in Southern Alberta, but Sarah just does her way there's all these different types of homeschooling. We would definitely be a number of them, but it's probably especially eclectic, meaning that we just pick and pull from wherever. And then she does things like I call it, we call it sorrow homeschooling. Like I do, cause it's totally her stuff. And then she's had a ton of people come to her cause that's all we've done. Like for, 20, almost 20 years we've homeschooled. So no real mentors. That's interesting. What about like literature? Is there stuff that you would recommend as far as that was a killer book or just anything that your resources that you would recommend, blogs, whatever.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah. They don't take advice well. When people would talk about Oh, what parenting books have you read? I'm like,

Timmy Eaton:

yeah,

Amie Bowden:

no,

Timmy Eaton:

This is my house.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah. Yeah. I probably should have along the way, but again, like I. I feel like their journey, like my kids journey has been just as much my journey. So I've been learning alongside with them and never ever have I pretended to be like, Oh yeah, I know what's going on here.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah.

Amie Bowden:

All right. We're going to figure this out together. And there's been a few times where I realized very quickly my math skills. Skills peaked in, grade two.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah. Oh yeah.

Amie Bowden:

Past that. And it's like hysterical laughter to crying and

Timmy Eaton:

No, we've noticed that like where your kids are totally doing stuff beyond where you got to. Have you just grown to trust your intuition? Is that what you would say? Cause it doesn't seem to bother you in that sense. It's not like you have to apologize for that. So have you just been like, no, I just feel it as I do as a mother and do it my way.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah. And

Amie Bowden:

that's been how I've gone through all of life, like very much relying on intuition for good or for bad,

Timmy Eaton:

yeah. So how does that go down with you and your husband?

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, I'll be curious if he even listens to this. I don't think I'll recommend him listening to it. Yeah, because he is very much of the school of thought that you do, reading, writing, writing arithmetic, and you've got it in the order, and you do an hour of each, and you get through the lesson, doesn't matter if there's tears, and, Everything you're gonna get done. And so I've been very much no, when you hit a wall, you hit a wall, like you can't push through that. And so he's been very hands off. It hasn't really been till this year that he's done much. And I think just because it's Abrams getting older math is far beyond my realm. And he's Fraser's my He's very science based. He's a physician. And so So he's been able, he has a lot more insight when it comes to the science and stuff.

Timmy Eaton:

So tell me if I'm allowed to get a little bit of insight into what about discussions about what are our kids going to do when they grow up type thing? What, how do those usually meander?

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, it's a, it's an interesting thing because you have a certain, I feel like especially our generation and before it was very much like you get through high school, if. Those of our faith, you go on a mission, you get home, you go to university or college, you get married this is how it is, and I feel like this next generation, that's not how it is, and it's less and less kids are doing post secondary. And for me, I think that's fantastic because as I said I really struggled academically and to have had, not had that pressure would have been like, my dad's an educator. So he was very much this is how it has to happen. And that's how my husband feels. But again, with Abram, like it's going to be so different. Like I don't know if he'll do post secondary and, um, and I think the grades or whether it's that, like. get it like kind of what you're saying develop a skill and get really good. So we're evolving to him.

Timmy Eaton:

No and don't you find you're having those conversations more like We have this little window of time, but now it's starting to hit us where we're like, oh my goodness in a few years we could be grandparents and so we want to direct them and at least guide them. And I thought for sure I'd be like, no, you got to go get a degree and do this and that. But more and more I'm going, I, you get a degree if it serves what you're going to do, but if not, don't waste your money. And I think that's the way that not just us, but I think the world is really going that way. Yeah. Especially as technology improves and like you said, the trades are improving. I like the way that they, I like their model anyway to work and get hands on and then do a little bit of schooling. Because

Amie Bowden:

We've gone full tilt like back to the apprenticeship.

Timmy Eaton:

Yes. And I like it. I think it's a good thing. What would you say to somebody who's starting and is a good friend and they're like yeah, but give me some counsel. Like what are some for sures that I need to understand if I'm going to choose the homeschool route?

Amie Bowden:

I would say, have fun with it. Make it work for you. And, not hold on to something so tight just for the sake of accomplishing that certain thing. Find what you're interested in. As I said already I feel like I've learned so much and I've been able to, do things with my kids that I wouldn't have been able to otherwise do.

Timmy Eaton:

And have you liked that by the way? Is it fun to like rediscover like stuff you didn't care about really when you were growing up and you're like this is like fun. Like I actually care about this stuff now.

Amie Bowden:

Yeah. And one thing, like I love reading with my kids. I always have since they were little, like we've, read all the. C. S. Lewis books and we've read a lot of Tolkien and we like, I really love literature. And so that's been something that's been so wonderful is being able to do that a part of the day. Yeah. Cause it's hard to find time for that in the evening.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah, it is. Yeah. That's one of my wife's favorite too. We call it together time, but read alouds,

Amie Bowden:

yeah. My kids like it too. Cause that's usually when I'm like, falling asleep so they know that if they get me to sleep they can go for a lift or whatever. Let's just put mom to bed. Yeah. Another thing that I had heard, this is that same woman actually from Vancouver, so she's my sister in law's. So she had eight kids that she homeschooled. And the one thing she said to me was if it's worth doing, it's worth doing half as good. And when she said that to me, like at the time I was a total perfectionist, I'm like no, no, no, no, no. If it's worth doing, it's worth doing a hundred percent. Yeah. That's honestly like how I live my life. You have to do it like that. And learning to. Live that I think has been so great and it's a great mantra for homeschooling and

Timmy Eaton:

Say it again I want to hear I want to make sure I got it. So

Amie Bowden:

If it's worth doing it's worth doing half It's good.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah half is good

Amie Bowden:

and it seems so like counterintuitive like almost gut wrenching oh Yeah.

Timmy Eaton:

Don't do anything.

Amie Bowden:

Half is good. Yeah. But really, let go of perfectionism. I think that, I don't know if it was Roomie or, one of the great writers of the century. of the ages said something along the lines of don't worry about climbing the mountain perfectionism. You will never reach its peak.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah. Yeah. You can't.

Amie Bowden:

It's true. That's not the point is perfectionism. It's about the journey and the fun along the way. And

Timmy Eaton:

yeah. And that's relevant in the day we live where it's making sure that people have self care. How have you done that? And what has been your husband's role in you finding time to, we call it fill your bucket or, to give attention to self care. Obviously you've talked about yoga and exercise and stuff like that. Is that a way and how have you filled your bucket and what's your husband's role in that?

Amie Bowden:

Yeah, he's always been very supportive of. Me doing, whatever it is. I want to do that being said, he's extremely busy. He models that really, really well though. He works in the emergency department, so it's a pretty high stress job, but you never guess. Like he seems. Um, He's such a chill person, and he's been really good at continuing to develop himself. He's really into disc golf and board games and mountain biking and all these things. And so he really is supportive of me doing those things. And I probably do more now than I've ever done. I'm in a dance class and I, we climb the climbing wall and so yeah, for me definitely staying active. And the other thing that I'd say top priority is getting sleep. Getting to bed and getting sleep. And again, it's easy for me to say that now, cause I don't have toddlers. Just those with toddlers, the time will come. That's

Timmy Eaton:

so funny you're saying. I just said to somebody, I think last week a former student and I was like, it's so weird. Like we, we really thought like we would never sleep again. We were like, we're never going to have a good sleep again. And we've been sleeping good for Eight years or something like,

Amie Bowden:

And then you have a bad sleep and you're like, Oh, I

Timmy Eaton:

want to die. I know. And then you can't imagine like what you did to get through that. Cause it was just so brutal and how it just affects your whole life. So yeah. Amen to that for sure. And

Amie Bowden:

the other thing is like recognizing like along that those lines is this is such a short time. And so to just get as much of it as you can our kids are in our lives as children for such a short time. And so for me, like homeschooling has been such a blessing to maximize that time with them.

Timmy Eaton:

People might've thought that I paid you to say that because the name of this podcast is this golden hour. And you just said it exactly how we feel like it. And I always share the story. I remember playing catch with my son in the front of our yard when he was probably six or seven. So that's probably almost 14 years ago or something. And just having this very clear feeling like, Oh, This window of time is over at some point. And so I want to maximize this. And I was just so grateful that we chose the homeschooling route because yeah, everybody can have quality time with their kids, but the fact is you can't argue with it when you're homeschooling, you have way more of that time. And I love how you said that. This has been awesome. I totally have enjoyed the interview. Can I'll just give you the last word, anything you want to say, and then we'll wrap up.

Amie Bowden:

The last word, huh? Don't often get that. Yeah. Yeah, just let it be fun. Enjoy. Enjoy your time and continue to develop as a person, recognizing that you're not giving up yourself of who you are. You can continue to develop yourself. And I think that's an example to your children.

Timmy Eaton:

Excellent. And I think that especially homeschooled mothers. Or the principal homeschool parent needs to hear that because you can lose your identity, with being so focused on your children. And so not lose it, but have to find it again, like thing. And

Amie Bowden:

yeah, and that was a fear of mine. I, I got married really young and had started having children really young. And so that was a fear of mine that I would lose my identity to motherhood and not that's not a noble thing, but I, it was a fear of mine. And so recognizing.

Timmy Eaton:

Yeah, we can do better to teach mothers their beautiful, sacred role as mothers while still maintaining their identity and that's going to look so different. And so we have to teach the principle clearly so that it can be implemented individually and subjectively to that mom. But it's true. It's like too often it's like somehow nobility to lose yourself, which is good. Lose yourself with your kids. But then. To not even know what you like anymore. That's weird.. So like definitely you need time to develop and cultivate yourself. And I don't know how well I've done that as a husband. I wish I hope I can improve that. Cause I don't want my wife to feel like that, so thank you very much. That was fun. That was a fun interview and hopefully we'll talk again soon.

Amie Bowden:

I hope so. Thanks a lot.

Timmy Eaton:

That wraps up another edition of This Golden Hour podcast. If you haven't done so already, I would totally appreciate it if you would take a minute and give us a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps out a lot. And if you've done that already, thank you much. Please consider sharing this show with friends and family members that you think would get something out of it. And thank you for listening and for your support. I'm your host, Tim Eaton. Until next time, remember to cherish this golden hour with your children and family.