Discover how the voice inside your head can be your biggest cheerleader or your worst critic. This episode of Pockets of Time is a deeply personal journey into my experiences with self-talk, revealing how the words we tell ourselves can shape our paths and determine our success. Listen to my own story of how I almost allowed negative self-talk to sabotage the start of this podcast, and how the influences of our environment and the people around us can fuel this inner dialogue. This exploration invites you to become aware of your own internal narratives, recognizing when you are too harsh on yourself, and providing tools to replace negativity with kindness and compassion.
Have you ever considered the power of journaling and positive affirmations? We delve into this in the second part of our episode, emphasizing that the energy and tone we use with ourselves can be as powerful as the words themselves. We tackle the commonplace difficulty of accepting compliments, and reinforce the importance of allowing ourselves to be acknowledged and appreciated. More crucially, we illuminate the practice of gratitude and its transformative capacity in shifting focus away from negative events and thoughts. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking insights and tools for personal growth, and a gentler, kinder relationship with themselves. Join us on this enlightening journey and let's unravel the power of self-talk together.
Discover how the voice inside your head can be your biggest cheerleader or your worst critic. This episode of Pockets of Time is a deeply personal journey into my experiences with self-talk, revealing how the words we tell ourselves can shape our paths and determine our success. Listen to my own story of how I almost allowed negative self-talk to sabotage the start of this podcast, and how the influences of our environment and the people around us can fuel this inner dialogue. This exploration invites you to become aware of your own internal narratives, recognizing when you are too harsh on yourself, and providing tools to replace negativity with kindness and compassion.
Have you ever considered the power of journaling and positive affirmations? We delve into this in the second part of our episode, emphasizing that the energy and tone we use with ourselves can be as powerful as the words themselves. We tackle the commonplace difficulty of accepting compliments, and reinforce the importance of allowing ourselves to be acknowledged and appreciated. More crucially, we illuminate the practice of gratitude and its transformative capacity in shifting focus away from negative events and thoughts. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking insights and tools for personal growth, and a gentler, kinder relationship with themselves. Join us on this enlightening journey and let's unravel the power of self-talk together.
Speaker 1:
Welcome to Pockets of Time. I'm Chunky Panda. Dive in as we uncover those unexpected gems of clarity and inspiration, from mental well-being to light-hearted fun. We're all about growth and a positive mindset Looking for a lift or some clear-headed insights. You're in the right pocket. Let's unravel the magic together. Welcome back, guys. I am so excited to be here today with you, guys. I just wanted to say thank you for being here, for tuning in, for showing up and for your love and support. I'm beyond grateful for each and every one of you. So thank you. I hope all of you are having a beautiful, incredible weekend day, whatever date is that you are listening to this. I hope that you are enjoying it and if you are not, I hope that things do get better, and I'm sending you my love, my heart and all the warm and fuzzies On today's episode we are going to be talking aboutare you guys ready?
Speaker 1:
Drumroll Self-talk. Self-talk is pretty self-explanatory. It is the way that you talk to yourself. It's that inner dialogue you have with yourself in your head, out loud. But yeah, just how you talk to yourself. And something that sparked this topic is a saying that I just heard the other day, and it's also something that I've struggled with for a really long time and I figured, hey, someone out there could probably use this or relate. So it's.
Speaker 1:
If you think you can't do it, then you've already quit before you've begun. That one's a heavy one. I feel like a lot of us can definitely resonate with that, and a lot of the times when we start something and we already have this doubt within ourselves, it can lead to being inconsistent and you're thinking like, oh, maybe there's something wrong with me. But as I've said in the past, I have been wanting to start this podcast and a couple other projects, and I'm starting one at a time because I'm one person and I can't do 10,000 things. But I wanted to do this podcast really long time ago and I think the biggest thing that stopped me from doing it was the way that I was talking to myself, the way that I thought, you know, I would try to start it and it would never go anywhere or mount to anything, because I had so much doubt in myself. It was like you're starting a project where you think in your mind already you're like it's not going to be successful, so it doesn't matter. You've already put that in your head.
Speaker 1:
So for me, I would try to do things and I would be so inconsistent about it, I would be so frustrated about it and I would just talk to myself in the worst way ever when it'd be thoughts like oh wow, what makes you think you can do this? You have no experience, you aren't, as I don't know, charismatic as X, y and Z and this person is so good at it, like you think, that you can amount up to them, and it's just like a bunch of terrible things that I would say to myself. And it's taken me a really long time to be better about it and clearly I'm in a better headspace because here we are. But yeah, guys, a lot of the times when you're inconsistent with things, it's because you really need to work on that self-talk and you really need to start believing in yourself because you're definitely worth it.
Speaker 1:
And a lot of the times I feel like we are not very aware of the way that we talk to ourselves. I feel like it's a habit that we develop and these habits happen as kids. It could start as past experience that you have with your family or friends or bullies or whoever it is. You're never going to believe something when you first hear it right when you first hear oh wow, you're so fat or you're so stupid, you're not going to hear that, you're not going to believe that right away. But if someone repeats it and this is why environment is heavy too people around you can actually heavily impact the way that you talk to yourself as well. Someone could sit there and say, wow, you're so stupid, you're so stupid, you're so stupid over time, and then at some certain point you start to ask yourself am I, maybe I am stupid and you start to believe it.
Speaker 1:
And that's the crazy part, because you brainwash yourself into thinking that is true when it is not. And that goes to show you that it's the same with your thoughts. It's the way you talk to yourself. It's when you keep telling yourself your certain way and if you don't believe it right away, but you say it enough, it's like your subconscious mind literally collects it and puts it in a box and at some point that box is going to be so full with all the negative, bad things that you say about yourself that it's going to start to seep out. And it's going to seep out into the way you think about yourself, how you feel about yourself, and it starts seeping into your relationships and, before you know it, you're projecting some of these insecurities and things on other people without even realizing that you're doing it, and it can be very hurtful.
Speaker 1:
And the biggest thing is awareness Once you start listening and really catching yourself when you're saying these terrible things to yourself, it helps. And for me, I still catch myself now. It's just something that you're always going to have to try to be more aware of, and it could be something so silly, as an I made a mistake. I'd be like oh my God, kelly, you're so dumb, I can't believe you did that. Gosh, who the heck does that? And those are the things that I catch myself now where I'm like no, kelly, you're not dumb, you just made a silly mistake and it's okay. You're going to be more aware about it and do better next time. So awareness is a huge thing, guys, and I think another thing that we do that's really bad is we compare ourselves to people, a lot of people, and it's like one of those things where it's not fair.
Speaker 1:
The negative self-talk comes from being like oh well, I'm not like this person, I'm not like that person. There's only one of you out there. Nobody can be you. Nobody doesn't matter what they do. They can't be you. Stop comparing yourselves to people. Everybody is at a different point in their life, at a different journey, and so are you, and there's a reason I am so beyond grateful for all the experiences and things that I've been through because I'm able to better relate to people and I'm able to sit here with you. Guys. If I didn't go through half the things I've gone through as a child or all that good stuff, then I wouldn't be me today, when I wouldn't be somewhat relatable. Take honor in that, guys. Everybody's on a different journey, so stop comparing. There's no reason to.
Speaker 1:
One of the things that has helped me better myself with the whole self-talking thing is self-compassion. It's just funny how we are so quick to defend other people, to cheer them on, to support them, to everything where we are so bad at it for ourselves, but then at the same time, we are also our worst critics. It's so much easier to be negative than it is to be positive, and I don't know why that is, and maybe that comes back to. Maybe you don't feel like you're worthy and it's something that we have to get out of our brains because you are. But self-compassion, start talking to yourself like if you were talking to a friend.
Speaker 1:
It's like when you get into those negative moments where you're like, oh, you're so stupid. Would you say that to your sister? Would you say that to somebody you cared about? No, then why would you say it to yourself? Start questioning that and start doing that for yourself and tell yourself that you are worthy, because you are worthy of the same love that you give. And I know every single episode. I've said this and I hope that in me saying this over and over again, someone's going to be like fuck, yeah, you're right, I do because you do. But yeah, start talking to yourself as if you were going to talk to somebody else because you just you wouldn't even be, as you wouldn't even be mean to that person. So, stop being mean to yourself.
Speaker 1:
And another thing that helps me is whenever I get into that negative self-talk, I like to pretty much kind of challenge what it is. It could be like a thing where I'm like, oh, I can't handle this, I'm not going to be able to do this. I like to look at it as well. What are the things that I can do to make that not true and what are the things that I can do to replace that kind of thinking where it's like what is one thing that I can do today that's going to get me closer to whatever it is that I'm trying to work on. And I think that thought has helped me with the whole podcast thing, because this whole thing can be so overwhelming, because we're taught to look at everything in such a big picture, Like we're taught to look at everything in well, what's the success rate in five years or three years, two years, and it's well, I'm not there yet. I can't tell you. But the one thing that I can tell you today is what I'm doing today to get closer to my goals. And I think when you start thinking that way, you start to be better to yourself and you start to go hey, I can do this, and I think that's the biggest step to anything. So stop looking at stuff in such a big picture and start breaking it down. And it also helps to journal that stuff down and I know that every single episode we've probably mentioned journaling, but it works.
Speaker 1:
There is a reason why everybody out there is saying journal. I feel like our thoughts come and go so quickly that we don't get to process it and we could process it, but by the next day it's already dissipated and we've forgotten that we were in that moment. So journaling is huge. It helps us keep track of the things that we say, the things that we think. It keeps us on track of our goals and things that we want to do. So I feel like when you journal, you can also write down positive thoughts that counteract the negative thoughts. Like we were just saying, journaling is another big thing that I have enjoyed and has definitely helped me really think, because I'll get into those moments and what I do is I'll flip through my journal and get to a page and I'm like, wow, I was in that headspace, but that was so silly. It's like you almost get to look at yourself from a different point of view.
Speaker 1:
And another thing that I love doing is using positive affirmations. It's the same way that we have that feedback loop of the negative things that we play back to ourselves. We have to start doing a positive feed to feed it back to ourselves. And I think the one thing that a lot of people don't realize is also it's not just having the positive affirmations, it's the energy that you put into it, the tone that you use. It's so important.
Speaker 1:
It's like if you said I am capable, but instead of saying that you're like I am capable, I am worthy, I am resilient it's like you pretty much are. It's like you're telling your, you're trying to tell yourself that, but you're questioning it. And I feel like it's like when I've seen other friends do it to friends where they try to hype each other up, and I've tried to hype other friends up when they say stuff and I'm like no, say it again, like I am capable, I can do this. And at first people start off with I am capable, I can do this, and you're like no, more energy, more passion, and it brings out this other side of them and for that moment in time, you can see that they believe it. For that, that second, because that energy is there and that shift is there. So when you think about it, you have to do the same thing with yourself.
Speaker 1:
When you wake up in the morning, I want you to look in that mirror and I want you to say those three things to you and whatever other affirmations that you want to say to yourself. You can write it on your mirror, you can put sticky notes, but I want you to look into the mirror at yourself, and I know that it's going to be uncomfortable at first because I tell you, I, for the longest time, could not look myself in the mirror, and I know that sounds crazy. I had a hard time just like really looking at myself and talking to myself, and it's going to feel uncomfortable and it's going to feel awkward, but over time I'm telling you this is going to help. It's helped me through so many things where you look in the mirror and you say I am capable, I am worthy, I am resilient, and you say it with those tones of conviction where you are like I know this about myself, because that is important. The tone that you use with yourself is so important. So positive affirmations, but also the tone and energy that comes with it. Okay, guys. And another thing, guys. Okay, this is one thing that I don't understand, and I mean I do it myself too, so I'm like, but like I don't understand it when other people do it. So positive affirmations, tones, self talk, all that good stuff.
Speaker 1:
Now comes accepting compliments from people. I don't know why. It still makes me feel weird and I'm learning to be better about it. And instead of rejecting it or Deflecting it or being awkward and throwing back another compliment. At people I say thank you. It's funny because, like I said you know before, we are so quick to support others through all this love, all this Complement, but when someone throws it back at us, we're like, oh fuck, like I don't know if I can take this. And and it is important that we start doing that because subconsciously we almost when we start doing this, it's like we all, we give our, we give ourselves permissions, who pretty much believe in ourselves. It's just like why should I not be acknowledged and be praised and be like appreciated, Start accepting compliments and start accepting the things that people say about you? You're so heavy to do it for other people, so you need to believe that you are deserving of it, because you are, and when you start doing that, something is going to click Over time. It's gonna feel weird at first, but we're gonna get better at it. Guys, us together. Okay, and Another thing is gratitude.
Speaker 1:
I Feel like a lot of us we don't practice that enough because we're always looking for the next best thing. We Focus on so much of the negative things that we forget what is around us and how blessed. We are Practicing gratitude can help shift the focus and, before I let you guys off, I Forgot to mention this earlier, but it goes back to when we were talking about self-talk and how your negative self-talk can collect over time and can spill and Seep into your life. This is like more short term, but back in the day, when I was working in the service industry, there was a bar that I was working at, bar restaurant that I was working at that had food drinks and we would get crazy busy. I'm talking about every single bartender probably had 10 to 12 people deep, and then also not only that, but we also have three tables out there and Also had to take orders for food drinks and make the drinks.
Speaker 1:
It was just super chaotic, hectic, and I tell you I loved those moments because it was such a challenge for me, because it was either I could break and it's like a domino effect if you mess up or if you Let yourself get psyched, it's everything just starts to fall apart. And it was such a challenge where I had my friends and that I was working alongside and I was like I can't let them down, I have to keep going, and Every time I would feel so Like I would feel that overwhelm, this, like I would feel that anxiety like rise and I would like, nope, you can do this, and I would literally just tell myself to breathe and I would just take a breath, I would go. You know what you can do this. You got this just one step at a time, just one step at a time, and that was like something that I would tell myself and I would make it through the shift, even though I was very close to that verge, but not a lot of people knew that. But, yes, a lot of the times you're just like moving and moving. But it just shows you that self-talk is huge and Even in a short case scenario like this, it is effective, as well as in a long-term scenario of talking to yourself.
Speaker 1:
I Hope that made sense, guys. I appreciate all of you guys. Thank you for tuning in. I hope that you are able to take something away with this episode that will help you in your everyday life, be better at talking to yourself, and I really hope that you guys really practice these Affirmations, looking in the mirror and saying it to yourself and, if not write it, write it over and over again, because you are so Worthy of it, and I hope that you do it enough times that you will believe it. Because I believe it, I believe in you guys. I love you guys, and you can do it All right Till next time. Bye you.