Overcoming Failure

Navigating failure is a part of life, and it's an experience I am no stranger to. I've battled with failure, made mistakes, and learned invaluable lessons along the way, which I am excited to share with you in this empowering episode of the Smart Wealthy Stylist podcast. Together, we’ll peek behind the curtain of failure, examining our own missteps and identifying what we could have done differently. This journey is all about recognizing our role in our failures, understanding how to move forward, and the indispensable role of a strong 'why'.

We'll delve into the daunting world of self-doubt, the struggle of maintaining a fitness program amid negativity, and how reconnecting with our 'why' can make all the difference. Tune in as we reiterate the power of resilience, the significance of staying true to your vision, and how knowing your 'why' can transform your journey in overcoming failures.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

Welcome to the smart, wealthy stylist podcast. I'm your host, emily Cardin. Over here. We're dedicated to helping hairstylists manage their finances, stay organized, healthy and manage their time and mental well-being. We focus on staying healthy in all areas of life and maximizing productivity. If you're a hairstylist looking for these things, then this is the podcast for you. Together, we'll avoid burnout and step into being the smartest, wealthiest stylist that we can be. Welcome back to the smart wealthy stylist podcast.

Speaker 2: 0:36

Today's episode is all about failure. I know I've had some people message me and be like what's going on? How's your podcast going? I haven't seen much from you. I had to take me a little break. I was absolutely exhausted and I was feeling some failure.

Speaker 2: 0:56

My goal with smart, wealthy stylist is to always be transparent with you and share with you how I work through my struggles and how to handle them in yours as well. So this week, obviously, since I'm coming back and getting back in the groove of things, I wanted to cover this because it is such a crazy thing to have to deal with. So you know a failure. There's been songs wrote about it, books, speakers give key notes on it. But no matter how much you listen to people talk about failure, you're never fully prepared on how to handle it until it looks you right in the face. And sometimes life is so hard and sometimes it's because we make it that way. And, like I said, I recently had my own fair share of failure and it knocked me back a few steps. But I'm still here and I'm not going anywhere and I'm actually really excited to get into this episode because I think so many of us deal with failure, whether it's in our personal life or business life. However, you're dealing with failure. We all have dealt with it at some point and if you haven't yet, you probably will. Not that I'm speaking that over your life, but sometimes that happens. So just to give you a little backstory what has been going on, you know, for the last, really since January it was the last six, seven months I have been getting up at four o'clock in the morning.

Speaker 2: 2:34

I do my podcast stuff, I do, you know, work on my business, and then I work out with Power Fit and then start my day. And whenever I started and down this whole journey, I was like, okay, I'm going to get out of debt, I'm going to get in shape, I'm going to do all these things all at once, because that's just how I roll A lot of times. I dive all in and then I try to hurry up and get it done. What I'm learning with this season in my life and these goals that I'm trying to get to is that, you know, I really think God's trying to work on my patience with me, because I'm not a patient person and when I set my sights on something, I want it now. I think so many of us are that way and it's hard, it's really really hard to have any sort of patience.

Speaker 2: 3:31

And so I I did a release of one of my courses and I did not win the six month challenge through Power Fit, which is totally fine. There was some amazing women who won, but, you know, I was just really hoping I would, and I know that sounds so petty and childish, but I was like you know, if I win this, this will wipe out all of my debt and then I can fast track all my other plans that I'm trying to accomplish. And so disappointment really did get ahold of me and I really, I really thought that I was going to win, you know, and that I was going to fast track my debt payoff and that I wasn't going to have to be as patient. I just wanted to like, I just want to get there. Like when you're on trying to do a debt free journey, the road is long and it's uncomfortable and I'm just over it, but I know what my plan is. I have my goals written down and I have a why. So with my fitness journey and with my debt payoff stuff, I have a very strong why's. So I'm not giving up. I'm not going to see these failures as something that's going to stop me. I just went through kind of a series of things and I'm going to share those with you on how I handled the failure, whether it be on my own part, you know, or it just didn't work out right. So, but most of the time when you fail, it's on you. You know, like, yes, I could have done more on my fitness journey to win this fitness challenge. I could have, you know, ate a whole lot cleaner, upped my weights, got a gym membership. You know, whatever I needed to have done, I could have done that, but I didn't, and so that resulted in failure.

Speaker 2: 5:37

It's really hard to own up to your own failure. Sometimes it's a whole lot easier to blame it on the power that bees, or you know God's plan, or you know, well, that was someone else's fault, well, it was rigged, well, blah, blah, blah. Like whatever you think, you know you can talk yourself out of it all day that it wasn't your problem, right. But the first step to moving forward is, with anything like with an addiction or any other problem that you're facing, is recognizing what you had in the stakes. What was it that you did that created this end result. So, by recognizing the things that I could have done differently to produce a different outcome is the very first step to dealing with failure is recognizing your part in that, recognizing what you could have done differently and adjusting your plan. So, like I said, that's the first step recognize what you could have done differently.

Speaker 2: 6:47

And you know, with my fitness journey, like I said, I probably should have got a gym membership to up my weights and I should have ate a little cleaner, because I would eat clean most of the time but not all the time. And when you're in a fitness challenge, like whether it be six months or a year, that's still like a really short amount of time. When you look at the grand scheme of things and you look at how long your life lasts, like it's pretty short. But the cool thing is that, yes, I failed, but I learned so much along the way and I am really proud of myself for making it six months. I didn't give up, I kept going and it was a really, really great feeling and it was proving it to myself that I can do it. No, I didn't win, but I learned so many valuable, great things through that six month time span and then on the smart with the set dial is side of things.

Speaker 2: 7:47

I created an online course. Well, it's actually a workbook, but it's available online and they there is an online version as well, like an online PDF book. I launched it and it was crickets. I mean, I haven't had any sales off of it and it was one of those things that I'm like. I literally have put in so many hours, so much work, so much time and not one person has bought this course and that was all. Of this happened literally within one week of each other, like it was.

Speaker 2: 8:21

I've been grinding it out and I was trying to get all this stuff out right when the challenge won, so that everything was in place and all these things would happen all at once and nothing happened on either side. So it felt like I had just majorly bombed, that I had wasted all of this time, and I'm sure there are seasons in your life where you feel like, oh my gosh, I've done all of this for nothing. Or you know, I've worked so hard for so long for nothing to come of this. But I wanna encourage you because it's not all for nothing, even though I haven't sold a single course. I know how to make online courses, I know how to figure out course topics and market research and I know how to create things. There's so many lessons that I've learned how I've learned to use several different programs and in creation and course creation, you know, I've learned how to do this podcast.

Speaker 2: 9:29

I've been able to help other friends also. I have had tons of people reach out to me that have found the podcast, that have said because of you, I'm not throwing in the towel, you know, and it's so powerful to me and so special to me to hear from people that SmartWatheyStyles has changed their lives. No, they're not buying my course, that's okay. I need to do some different things and I did get some feedback from some of my friends and some colleagues and people that I trust. You know, like work mentors, that I trust their opinion and there's definitely some adjustments that I should make or that I am going to make, but once again, it pushes me to learn a new skill so and invest more money into this. So there's nothing wrong with that and I'm just gonna leave this course up there and people can purchase the workbooks if they want them until I'm ready for the next step, and so I'm just gonna continue to stay the course and I felt that failure and it was real and it was hard and it caused me to pause, for really, I guess this is.

Speaker 2: 10:44

I was really ready to start last week but it just the weekend at being crazy. So I really took off a solid month to just sit back, reflect, figure out what's going on in my head, how I'm feeling, you know, recheck my why. Why am I doing this? Where do I need to pivot, you know. And so it's really important to listen to yourself whenever you're going through these things, to work through them.

Speaker 2: 11:12

So the second thing is is, if you need a break, take it. My break was amazing. It was a great time of self-reflection and it really allowed me to kind of open up my mental space again and remember my why. Of course and you know I always talk about your why and how important it is to have a strong why. This is why, whenever you hit roadblocks and hardships, difficulties, you know when you're swimming against the current in your business or in your situation. This is why you need a strong why. Why are you doing this? The strong why is why I keep pushing through and why, when I get to the other side, I'll be like I am so glad that I had a plan and a dream and a why to say, okay, this is why I'm doing this and I'm going to continue to do this until I complete it and see this through. And so that leads to the next one.

Speaker 2: 12:17

Re-evaluate your goals and start again. So, after you've taken your break, you know, go back to the basics, look at your goals. What was your goal in the first place? Was it to create an online course? Is it to move into a new salon? Is it to raise your prices? Is it to, you know, open your own place? Is it to up your amenities that you offer for your clients? Whatever it is that you are wanting to do, if you feel like you're failing, go back to your goals and look at them and go okay, so I'm not too far off, I'm not failing as bad as I think I am. Or you know, if it's with your finances, go back and you know, look at, make sure you're keeping track on your budget tracker and your expense trackers. And you know, make sure that you're staying vigilant in your part, doing your part, and then, if you fail, it's okay, regroup and step right back in.

Speaker 2: 13:21

The next one is stop negative self-talk and self-thinking. I'm not sure where I heard this, but it's for my childhood and I remember hearing stop your stinking thinking. And I love that saying because it is so true that when you talk negatively to yourself, you start believing negatively about yourself. So, even if you're failing, even if you're struggling, stopping the negative self-talk and self-thinking can bring a great deal of happiness back into your life and help you get through difficult seasons.

Speaker 2: 14:02

My friend and I I was doing her hair and she was talking, and you know she was talking about her and her aunt and their health struggles. And just you know how hard it is when you know you diet and you do really well for, like you know, three, four, five months and then all of a sudden you fall off the wagon, you eat all of the weight back, plus 10, you know and you're just like what is wrong with me? Why? Why do I do this? And her aunt said something about how they had some family mental health issues and she's like do you think that I'm bipolar? Because my mom had this and you know she would do this. And you know, one of the characteristics is that you know, you do this, this and this. And she started thinking all these negative thoughts about herself and thinking like, oh my gosh, I have this problem. This is why I can't stick with anything. It's these compulsive thoughts. And da, da, da, da, you know. And she started really thinking like, oh, I have a problem, you know. And then my friend was like I think I have that too, because I do the same thing. And when she was talking to me I said, hey, literally everyone does that. You are human, you don't have bipolar disorder, neither does your aunt. You know like I know both of these ladies very well. There is no bipolar going on. I mean, they're very, very, you know not, they're not bipolar.

Speaker 2: 15:44

And it was one of those things like negativity can take root in your life. So quickly we can negative talk ourselves into a really bad position or into something that we don't even own. Really quickly we could all be like, oh my gosh, I have all these characteristics. Do I have? You know this, xyz right? Negative thinking and negative self-talk can spin you into a downward spiral.

Speaker 2: 16:17

Now, I am not dismissing mental health issues. I am not saying if you have bipolar, you are any less than someone who does not have bipolar. I just wanna make that clear. All I'm saying is these two women were about to talk themselves into thinking that they had bipolar disorder because they can't stick with a workout program. That is not the truth, though.

Speaker 2: 16:39

The truth was that we are all human and we all struggle from time to time, and sometimes you're gonna fall off the wagon. You're going to fail. When you do, what sets you apart from the others is that you can pick yourself back up and decide that you're not going to continue to fail, that you are going to look at your why and your goals and say, okay, these are my goals, I am going to stick with them. Let's regroup, take a break and get right back into it. That whole dedication over motivation thing, right? So all I'm saying is that by thinking positively about yourself, talking positively to yourself and stopping your stinking thinking can make a master or majorly big difference in your life when it comes to tackling those goals that you have or those dreams that you have. Stop your stinking thinking and turn it around.

Speaker 2: 17:43

The next one is refocus and remind yourself of your why, but I already touched on that, so we don't need to go over that again. Just focus on your why. And then the last one is to stay true to yourself and your vision. It's really easy in today's society to get distracted, and just scrolling through Instagram can bring up a whole lot of things that you think you should probably change in your business or in your life, or in your marriage or in your fitness journey or whatever. Having a strong why, writing your goals down and making sure that your vision is clear. You know what you want to accomplish and why you want to accomplish it, regardless of what anyone else is doing out there Sometimes. If you need to delete social media, if you need to distance yourself from certain people in your life, if you need to get off Facebook, if you need to stop listening to certain podcasts, if you, whatever it is that you need to do to silence that confusion, do it.

Speaker 2: 18:57

Whenever you have a dream, a goal and a vision, staying true to your dream, your goal and your vision is of utmost importance, because as soon as you start looking around, you're going to think that you're doing something wrong, or that you want to change your goal, or that how you're going about reaching your goal isn't the right way, and that couldn't be further from the truth. You need to stay true to your vision and your goal and when you fail, pick yourself back up, reevaluate and then, if you need to change something at that point because of failure, do it. You can always pivot, but just make sure you're not pivoting because so and so is, or make sure you're not pivoting because it looks better doing it this way, right, I want you to make sure that you are staying true to yourself. Failure is difficult and it is uncomfortable, and sometimes you do need to pivot.

Speaker 2: 20:02

So, like with the smart, wealthy stylist stuff, you know, when I was doing my market research, like I kind of picked something that when I was doing my market research I knew that I was picking a topic that probably wouldn't sell well, and that's because hairstylists don't care about finances. There are very few of them. There's literally 5% of stylists who know their numbers. So by niching down, I thought, okay, I'll niche down on hairstylists, I will show them what I'm doing, how I'm getting out of debt, and then I will help them do the same. You know, I'll help them raise their prices you know, set prices on facts, not on emotions and help them elevate their businesses and do all these things Well.

Speaker 2: 20:50

I picked an industry that most hairstylists don't care. They don't care anything about that, they just wanna show up to work. They don't, you know, and that's okay. I'm here for the ones who want to elevate themselves, elevate their businesses and move forward. So I knew that going in that it wouldn't be, you know, a massive smash hit and I'd have millions of people trying to buy my course because it's uncomfortable, it's not a fun course, it's talking about, you know, money, getting out of debt, numbers like it's not necessarily a good time unless you're into that stuff. So, but I'm still going to stay true to my vision because I realize that there's a massive need for that. Whether hairstylists want to admit that or not, most of them don't know their numbers, they don't know the business side of things, they don't want to deal with their pricing, they don't want to deal with getting a website or a business Instagram account, and but when they do, I'm here and I'm going to continue to stay true to my vision and my mission in helping hairstylists elevate themselves and their businesses, and really any small business that listens to this podcast can also benefit from this.

Speaker 2: 22:09

So if you are facing failure today, I hope that this has been encouraging to you to know that other people are failing too, and it's okay. If you fail, you just have to remember your why, readjust and continue on, and I believe in you and I know that you are going to crush your goals eventually. Sometimes it's painful, sometimes it takes a long time, but that's okay. Don't get distracted by the world and everything that they have to offer. Stay true to yourself and keep pushing through until you reach the other side. I believe in you and I will talk to you guys next week.

Speaker 1: 22:53

Thank you for listening in today. If you have a burning question or a topic you want me to cover, leave a review and ask the question in the review. This is the best way to get your questions answered. Just remember you are a smart, wealthy stylist and you are capable of anything you set your mind to. I'll catch you later, Don't be a stranger.