Can the structure of marriage actually bring harmony instead of inequality? Join us on the Regular Guys Bible Study Podcast for an insightful look into 1 Peter 3, where we explore the often misunderstood roles of wives and husbands. We kick off by examining how submission within marriage is designed for harmony, not hierarchy. Through an engaging discussion, we highlight the influence wives can wield through respectful conduct and the enduring significance of inner beauty, supported by biblical exemplars like Sarah and Abraham.
Navigating marital decision-making can be tricky, but it’s all about partnership and mutual respect. This episode features candid reflections and humorous anecdotes that shed light on the biblical concepts of headship and submission. We tackle the controversial notion of women as the "weaker vessel," unpacking it with sensitivity and insight. By sharing personal stories, we illustrate how balancing these ancient principles with modern dynamics can create a harmonious relationship.
True beauty isn't skin deep—it’s a gentle and quiet spirit. Our discussion emphasizes this profound biblical truth, examining various Bible translations to capture the essence of inner beauty. We underscore the importance of treating wives with honor, valuing their opinions, and ensuring equality in decision-making. This episode leaves you with a powerful message: true respect and honor in marriage come from within. Don’t miss our next episode as we continue to explore the teachings of 1 Peter 3. Keep reading, stay tuned, and share the wisdom!
Can the structure of marriage actually bring harmony instead of inequality? Join us on the Regular Guys Bible Study Podcast for an insightful look into 1 Peter 3, where we explore the often misunderstood roles of wives and husbands. We kick off by examining how submission within marriage is designed for harmony, not hierarchy. Through an engaging discussion, we highlight the influence wives can wield through respectful conduct and the enduring significance of inner beauty, supported by biblical exemplars like Sarah and Abraham.
Navigating marital decision-making can be tricky, but it’s all about partnership and mutual respect. This episode features candid reflections and humorous anecdotes that shed light on the biblical concepts of headship and submission. We tackle the controversial notion of women as the "weaker vessel," unpacking it with sensitivity and insight. By sharing personal stories, we illustrate how balancing these ancient principles with modern dynamics can create a harmonious relationship.
True beauty isn't skin deep—it’s a gentle and quiet spirit. Our discussion emphasizes this profound biblical truth, examining various Bible translations to capture the essence of inner beauty. We underscore the importance of treating wives with honor, valuing their opinions, and ensuring equality in decision-making. This episode leaves you with a powerful message: true respect and honor in marriage come from within. Don’t miss our next episode as we continue to explore the teachings of 1 Peter 3. Keep reading, stay tuned, and share the wisdom!
Speaker 1:
You are listening to the Regular Guys Bible Study Podcast, the Bible study for regular guys by regular guys. We are your hosts, Ken and Steve, and we are just regular guys studying the.
Speaker 2:
Bible together not theologians.
Speaker 1:
Hey, hey, steve, how's it going? Good how are you? Ah, I'm good. I'm getting ready to go on my trip. Um, at the end of our last one, it said it might be a while, but we decided to get a short Bible study in the very first part of 2 Peter 2 Peter 3. No.
Speaker 2:
And it is short, it's only seven verses 1 Peter 3. Oh yeah, what did I say?
Speaker 1:
Second Peter, chapter three.
Speaker 2:
Oh, I meant third Peter, chapter one.
Speaker 1:
All right, First Peter, chapter three. We're actually going to go through a pretty short number of verses, but I think doing the whole thing would be unreasonable. I think doing the whole thing would be unreasonable and after this one it will be a couple of weeks at least Because I'm taking two weeks off and I'm not doing this from Serbia and Croatia. That's unreasonable, because the time zone is the big thing and my wife would really be irritated if I took time on this.
Speaker 2:
I think you're afraid of persecution.
Speaker 1:
That could be it persecution from my wife, can you imagine, for doing good, good, I can't. I can't imagine how upset she would be if we are in dubrovnik or something you know, and and I say hell hold on I gotta do the podcast now.
Speaker 2:
Um, she would be kind of irritated especially if you lugged all the equipment with you.
Speaker 1:
Oh gosh yeah, I didn't even think about that. Um, I think if I did that I would leave it with you, but that's not happening anyway um, yeah, I would do a bunch of sound effects throughout the whole thing and you would you would. You would be doing like rim shots and all sorts of stuff. You would probably devise some new ones too probably.
Speaker 2:
You know. I was looking for that button and I'm eating. The other day I asked my team a question.
Speaker 1:
No one said a thing oh, that would be a great addition to Teams actually to add those little buttons that only the organizer could do.
Speaker 2:
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:
Hmm, all right, I'm going to have to, maybe.
Speaker 2:
I can add those myself. Yeah, I think our company would turn them off, though.
Speaker 1:
Oh yeah, oh yeah, they would.
Speaker 2:
They'd disable it.
Speaker 1:
Oh, yeah, yeah, All right guys. Well, we are on 1 Peter, chapter 3. This time we're going to say it right 1 Peter, chapter 3. If you haven't read it, go ahead and read it. It's very short. The first half we're reading 1 through 7, which is about wives and husbands. All right, so this could be controversial, but it's what the Bible says, all right. So we're going to go by what the Bible says and try to interpret what it means by that. Why don't we go ahead? You want to go ahead and start reading, steve? Sure, all right, let's start reading's start reading, but before no, before we read, it starts off likewise no, it starts out like wise wives okay, but the first word is likewise.
Speaker 1:
So oh, okay, likewise wise wives. Okay, so what does likewise mean? What were we just talking about?
Speaker 2:
It's what it's likewise for. Like, therefore.
Speaker 1:
That's right. What's it there for? Likewise means Submission to authority, all right. So we've been talking about submission to authority. Specifically, he had just gone over servants to their masters and how they're treated. I don't think you're doing a great lead in here. That's what it read chapter 2, 23 through 25. He says talking about Jesus. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return. When he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him. Who judges justly? He himself bore our sins in his behaved on the cross. And now, steve, I want you to read chapter 3, 1 through 7.
Speaker 2:
Likewise, wives be subject to your own husbands so that, even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives. Obey the word. They may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives when they see a respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair and putting on of gold jewelry or the clothing you wear, but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which, in God's sight, is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, and you are her children, and if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. Likewise husbands Actually let's stop there.
Speaker 1:
This is about wives, that's about wives. And then there's a likewise about husbands.
Speaker 2:
It's a lot shorter.
Speaker 1:
It is a lot shorter because I don't know why. Why is that, Steve?
Speaker 2:
I don't know, maybe no, I'm not going to say that I don't know. Maybe I'm not going to say that I don't know.
Speaker 1:
Alright, alright, steve. You know I said this could be somewhat controversial, but there's no controversy in the word. It is the word of God, so this is truth. So what does it mean? Do you have thoughts on this, steve?
Speaker 2:
Yes, Okay, notes. But the husband and wife are equal and they're asked to basically give 100% of themselves to each other and their family. But if it comes down to the final decision on a controversial issue, the husband has the final say, kind of like the VP has to vote if Congress ties.
Speaker 1:
So have you and your wife ever come down to that in a decision?
Speaker 2:
I know that we have. I can't remember the details.
Speaker 1:
Okay, yeah, it's just I don't want, I don't need to know the details of the decision. Yeah, paige and I have. We have thought. I don't remember exactly what it was either, but when it came down to it, we both understood the Scripture and she agreed that, as the head of the house, I will. I mean, she said you know I will agree and go ahead with your decision on this. Was it the right decision? Probably not, I mean honestly, especially if it was a financial decision. I am notoriously bad at making financial decisions.
Speaker 2:
I can relate to that.
Speaker 1:
I don't think so, Steve.
Speaker 2:
Well, okay, here's a perfect example. Okay, the house that we got up by my parents. She didn't want to do that. Okay, and we did it, and it turns out it may be a very short-lived destination for us.
Speaker 1:
Okay, yeah, that could be that doesn't mean it was wrong. You're actually going to stay there for a few months.
Speaker 2:
That's true.
Speaker 1:
So yeah, no, but I understand I have made lots of poor choices. But the reality is and I think that is one of the keys here about wives, when it says wives likewise, wives be subject to your husbands, and it is not about being I don't think this is about being my servant. My wife is not my servant. How do you think that would go with your wife, steve?
Speaker 2:
Oh, she's totally on board with being my servant.
Speaker 1:
I'll tell her what to do, and well, she'll tell me where to go uh there, my wife would beat the crap out of me if I treated her like a servant, and rightfully so. Honestly, uh, you know, that's not, it's demeaning.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and that's not who we are called to be as husbands.
Speaker 1:
So before we're not to that part yet, I know, but before we talk more about the wife, I just wanted to stop there and now I will read the part about the husband, because we should share the reading equally, steve.
Speaker 2:
Oh yeah, I read six verses and you read one. Okay, go ahead.
Speaker 1:
No, no, no. The point is you read about how wives should behave, which you know is arguably the controversial part. I'm going to read about how the husbands should be. That's 50 50 split. Likewise, husbands live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered I'm sorry, but I think that verse can be controversial as well how is that?
Speaker 1:
oh, as the weaker vessel the weaker vessel um, you know, the truth is that's why we have gender, gender sports, right in a weightlifting competition in the olymp. Do they have the women compete with the men? They do not.
Speaker 2:
Now to be fair, those women would way outlift you or I, but they're not going to outlift the male weightlifters.
Speaker 1:
Right. But if we were weightlifters, arguably we should be able to outlift those women. But I'm not a weightlifter, so the way we are made is different, is not just about a choice, or even the organs that look, I don't know, I'm just going to stop right there. It is about how we are made in the womb and that a male and we are born male or we are born female and nothing can change that. So they are the weaker vessel. That's the way God made women and, yes, you're right, there are women that are stronger than me and you and there are men. Some men are, like, weaker than my wife or your wife, even though they're not bodybuilders. But you know, that's a in the generality. If you were to generalize which this is talking about, a generalization of men and women, the woman is the weaker vessel.
Speaker 2:
If we're talking just about physical strength, I think that's hard to argue against. Now I think a lot of people say, whoa, they're stronger in this or stronger in that. Totally true. But I don't think that's what it's talking about.
Speaker 1:
No, I think they're talking about mainly physical here. I will say that in general and you can disagree with me here, I don't know if this is, and this may not be an accurate my opinion women are typically more emotional than men when it comes to the less aggressive emotions. So, for example, men can get very angry.
Speaker 2:
Have you met my wife?
Speaker 1:
And um, have you met my wife? Well, my wife can get extremely angry, um, but I'm when I'm saying men have more of a tendency to get like violent angry, right when the yeah.
Speaker 2:
Women tend to have the I don't know what you would call them the softer emotions.
Speaker 1:
More emotional, more what we call. We'd say, oh, you're getting all emotional, and the thing is we don't say that when we get angry.
Speaker 2:
It's not the same, though it's a little different, but they are emotions.
Speaker 1:
Oh, it's not the same, though it's a little different, but they are emotions, um. But yeah, I would say that women tend to have, uh, uh, tend to have a greater sense of the softer emotions than we do, than men do, um, and that you might say that makes them weaker as well in times of stress or in times of, you know, maybe panic, in a dire situation or something.
Speaker 2:
They're not nearly as afraid of this one question that I don't really like. How do you feel?
Speaker 1:
Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, that's a tough one. You know, I just got off with my. I talked on the phone with my mother a few minutes ago and my wife said what did she say?
Speaker 2:
That's another tough one. I don't know, I'm not joking. What did she say? That's another tough one, and I'm not joking, I don't know. We talked about stuff.
Speaker 1:
We talked about stuff, that's it. I don't know. So that has nothing to do with this. I'm sorry, but that just reminded me that I had no idea how to answer that question, all right. Reminded me that I had, no, no idea how to answer that question. Um, all right. So let's move on to the next section of of you know, just, we, I think we've beaten be submissive or subject to your husband, um, to death a little bit, um, but then it says, says it talks about adornment.
Speaker 2:
Well, there was one thing I wanted to touch on in verse 2. Okay, what it says when they see your respectful and pure conduct, this is for wives. Ah, yes, that's a good thing, because I'm not always respectful and pure.
Speaker 1:
That's true, and this is talking about winning over lost husbands.
Speaker 2:
An unsaved husband, yeah.
Speaker 1:
Right that they may.
Speaker 2:
But I was really saying that in tongue-in-cheek, that you know it's just for wives. I don't think that is. I mean, it is here, but there are other places Right when we are called to be respectful and pure.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, this is. I think it's interesting, though, that we are not called in a similar way to win over our wives by being respectful and have pure conduct. I think it is assumed that if the husband is saved, his wife will just follow him in that way.
Speaker 2:
Perhaps, although I do recall I don't remember what this was in. It was some probably some marriage weekend thing we did once and it talked about how the woman wants to be loved and cared for, while the man wants respect. And I think it may have even referenced this verse, which you know. I think there's some truth to that.
Speaker 1:
I think there is truth to that. I think the world would argue with that just because the world wants to act like we're all the same. Men and women are the same. But yeah, I think there is a lot of truth to that. I know that as a man, I want to be respected by my wife. That's one of the most important things to me is to be respected by my wife. That's one of the most important things to me is to be respected by my wife.
Speaker 1:
And when I feel disrespected by my wife, that is actually one of the most painful things for me. I feel so hurt. So yeah, that's a good point, steve. And so by just showing you know he's saying here, just you know, have great contact and respect your husband. Show them respect and that might bring them to Christ.
Speaker 2:
But you wanted to talk about their adorning.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, so it says. Do not let your adorning yeah, so it says. Do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair and putting on of gold jewelry, jewelry or the clothing you wear, but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart, with imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which, in God's sight, is very precious.
Speaker 2:
All right. So Just a slight aside here. Yes, If someone from this time were to come into our church and look at what people wear.
Speaker 1:
What do you think their reaction would be? From what time?
Speaker 2:
When this was written.
Speaker 1:
Well, our technology is so different, steve, they're going to be amazed by everything. Are you talking about? Just looking at what we wear?
Speaker 2:
I'm just talking about the lack of modesty. I'm just talking about the lack of modesty of people these days.
Speaker 1:
And I won't say it's just women, but women tend to be less modest than men in how they dress, which is very distracting for us men. Okay, first of all, quit looking, Steve, I don't know what you're doing. We need to talk about that a little bit. I am not distracted by these things. I don't think very often anymore, but it may be because I'm just so old.
Speaker 2:
I don't know, if I believe you in that, but okay. I mean, I will notice, but I believe you in that, but okay.
Speaker 1:
I mean, I will notice, but I'm not distracted.
Speaker 2:
Well, to me that's the same thing. The fact that you noticed is that you were distracted okay, maybe so but I'll say this that it's not.
Speaker 1:
Nothing goes through my brain anymore. That is a lustful thought like it would when I was younger. I will have thoughts like I cannot believe she wore that my prudeness would come out. But I don't think I have those other kind of thoughts really.
Speaker 2:
Do you think that's kind of what this is calling women to do To not flout?
Speaker 1:
Well, I don't think it's about. I don't think this is about um showing cleavage or um.
Speaker 2:
I'm not sure that was even a thing back then. At least it isn't in all the movies.
Speaker 1:
Do you think but is this about? Um, okay, it's about beauty, so I guess. So about? Okay, it's about beauty, so I guess. So, whatever, I don't hairstyles okay, yeah, you're probably right, this is probably a making yourself beautiful. Yeah, I don't that's a good time for that, because I have no idea what to say there.
Speaker 2:
Steve yeah, yeah um I did let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit but I think this is talking about.
Speaker 1:
I was relating it towards their husband, but maybe it's not, because he's talking about how wives relate to their husbands. Right, yeah, pretty much the whole paragraph's about that. So I think this is about.
Speaker 2:
I don't see anything wrong with a woman trying to look pretty for their husband and well, I was rereading this and read let's see another translation.
Speaker 1:
And like nlt says, do not be concerned about the outward beauty. Um, let's see niv says uh, your beauty should not come from outward adornments such as blah, blah, blah, but these other things.
Speaker 2:
I don't think it's, and then it doesn't even sound like it's about dressing at all.
Speaker 1:
I don't think it's saying that it's bad to dress well for your husband, but that's not it's more saying that it's let your um the beauty of your gentle and quiet spirit.
Speaker 1:
Let that be your focus let, yeah, and let that be the thing that makes the biggest impact. I don't I don't read this as saying don't wear, don't make your hair nice, but that it's saying don't make that be your beauty, right? Um, it's like if, if don't make your external appearance be what makes you beautiful, because's got to be more than that that makes you beautiful.
Speaker 2:
um, that's how I read that you know what my dad used to say growing up um, let's see he would.
Speaker 1:
He would stomp on your foot and say does your?
Speaker 2:
head hurt now. No, but he would say, beauty is skin deep and ugly goes clear to the bone.
Speaker 1:
That's actually that's true.
Speaker 2:
That's what this is saying it's saying if your interior is ugly, you shouldn't be, you should be gentle and beautiful from the inside, right, don't let your beauty be skin deep and worry about the beauty from within.
Speaker 1:
And you know, again, I don't think he's saying like, have crappy looking hair, um, and don't wear any jewelry, but that's not the focus. All right, um. And then, uh, let's see. Um, the esv at the end of that section says uh, and you are her children talking about sarah. Um, if you do good and do not fear anything, that is frightening, um, if you look at, I think that that's just very strange how that's worded.
Speaker 2:
Um if you no longer fear something that's frightening, then it's not frightening anymore.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, let's see the NIV words. It this way you are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
Speaker 2:
That seems much better. That's much clearer to me, remind me again the difference between esv and niv they're two different translations, steve I know that, but one of them is um the new and I put it in, the go ahead, the the esv is a word for word translation to english.
Speaker 1:
the niv, the new niv, that is, which is funny, because the new niv stands for new international version, but there's an old niv and there's a new niv. The new niv is a word for intent translation. So there are times when it is word for word, but when that doesn't make sense or when it doesn't translate well, they try to come up with what they're trying to convey, what the author is trying to convey, and actually, you know, I was really against that the first time I saw a translation like that. But then I realized that sometimes when we read and they quote Old Testament so in New Testament's written in Greek, the Old Testament's in Hebrew, and it'll be changed the translation or the quote from the Old Testament is it's not a paraphrase, but it's not a word-for-word translation. It is a word-for-intent translation.
Speaker 2:
Plus, I mean a lot of times when we're talking, we talk in, you know, idioms and stuff of our own time right, which, if you're not a native speaker of english, make absolutely no sense. That's true, and I think it's true of other languages. It's not just a problem in English. So it makes sense to go for intent rather than word for word. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1:
All right, then let's talk about the husband's thing, unless you have more. Do you have more you want to talk about? No Do you have anything you want to talk about, where it says husbands, blah, blah, blah. Show honor to your wives.
Speaker 2:
I don't have notes on that. We can certainly talk about it.
Speaker 1:
Okay, all right so what is it? I know you've got a note no, I have a nose that's different. Okay. Likewise, husbands, live with your husbands in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel.
Speaker 2:
Wow, you really botched that verse Did.
Speaker 1:
I.
Speaker 2:
Husbands live with your husbands. Is that what I just said? That's what she said.
Speaker 1:
No, I did not.
Speaker 2:
You did Back it it up. Listen to it.
Speaker 1:
Okay, it's wives, ken wives I think you're lying, but I'm gonna start over just in case. Likewise, husbands live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. You know, I think it might be possible that I read it wrong, because I was in IV or NLT, so it's possible that I said husbands twice. All right, sure. That was not a Freudian slip. My wife is all female, all right.
Speaker 2:
My wife is all female, all right um, and steve is not my husband, um, no, he steve said no, um, let's just keep moving, all right, anyway, showing honor All right, anyway. Showing honor.
Speaker 1:
So live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the women as the weaker vessel, all right.
Speaker 2:
What does it mean to live with them in an understanding way? So to me that, is a very tall order, because a lot of times I have no idea. I have no understanding of what my wife is talking about.
Speaker 1:
Okay.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, it could be that you know we were talking about something and she changed gears without letting me know. That happens sometimes, and other times it's just like she'll be talking about something and so-and-so Chris said this blah, blah, blah. I'm like we know 15 Chris's. Which one are you talking about?
Speaker 1:
Okay, steve, I think it means that this stuff happens and we need to just live with it and don't be frustrated by it. So right before here, I say you know I'm leaving tomorrow to go on a trip and my wife has been. You know what it's stressing. Now I am going to use the word that all men use about their wives she's been nagging me to get packed, the nag word. She's been nagging me that I need to pack.
Speaker 1:
My wife can't stand it that I wait until the last minute. I don't know why would I pack early?
Speaker 2:
I don't know what I. Why would I pack early? I, I don't know. So it actually makes it harder for me to pack early, because then I'll be like that right before going I'll be like, well, I forgot what I packed, now I gotta go unpack it all. See what I didn't pack so we're leaving tomorrow.
Speaker 1:
So I did start packing today. I'm not quite quite done and when I started I said I got to go do the podcast now and that that was irritating to her because she said you're not done and the the command here is not obey your wives, it is live with your wives in an understanding way. And the thing is she gets very stressed out about me not being ready. So for me to live with her in an understanding way, I need to understand that that stresses her out and try not to stress her out. Try to comfort her and help her in that sometimes that means pack early. Sometimes what time's your flight? It's not until 3 40 in the afternoon.
Speaker 1:
Oh, good grief, I wouldn't be packing until tomorrow I would have packed early in the morning if it was just me yes, it would have been 10 in the morning for me. Yeah so, but you know that part of living in an understanding way is having this compromise, where I am packing right now Well, not right now, but I have started packing this earlier today and I will do most of it after this and have very little to do tomorrow and that's okay you could come over and work on my uh irrigation projects you know what I could, but what's that page?
Speaker 1:
yeah, I'll be right there. Um, she's she really needing some help with the new flotchy, with the zipper stuck or something, the TSA luggage code, I don't know. It's really important though. So I planted two trees yesterday. I don't need in this rocky soil that's like you dug the holes last weekend yeah, it was left, other than, do you know? That I couldn't play tennis on tuesday because I dug the holes on saturday. My back was out from using the rock bar good times yeah yay texas yeah, all right.
Speaker 1:
So showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel we talked about that a little bit. Right, but actually what does it mean to show honor?
Speaker 2:
Well, it goes on to say since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. So if I were to unpack that a little, I'd say starting with heirs with you of the grace of life. I think that means they're partners with us in this life, this life, the grace that we've been given to even be alive.
Speaker 1:
Uh-oh, we had a couple of internet little hiccups there, I think.
Speaker 2:
Oh, okay. Well, I probably didn't need to say what I had to say.
Speaker 1:
No, keep going, Steve. But showing honor, I mean it could mean all sorts of things like don't just dismiss your wife's opinions and thoughts, take them to heart and in consideration of all things, and well, you know, I think, what when we were talking about the earlier um, we treat our wives as an equal partner until it comes down to a decision that we can't make together. Right, that shows them honor when we don't treat them as worse than we are. That's my opinion, so.
Speaker 2:
All right. Well, it seems like we've pretty much. I think we're done here. Knocked it down here, yeah.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, okay, so we're going to not have this for a couple of weeks then, but in the meantime, read first Peter, chapter three, the second part, and we will be back eventually and you will, you know, hopefully, care. So keep listening, tell your friends. Bye, y'all the Regular Guys. Bible Study is a Chasm LLC production. All rights reserved.
