Stay tuned for the next episode of Spark.N.Stride as we dive deep into the inspiring journey of Dennis Penny, a true advocate for the veteran community at Rutgers University! 🇺🇸
For the past six years, Dennis and his team have poured their hearts and souls into assisting our veterans, creating a positive impact that resonates with everyone they touch. Their passion for serving those who have served our country is truly awe-inspiring!
Hosted by the incredible retired Air Force veteran, Mach, this episode is a heartfelt exploration of dedication, camaraderie, and the power of giving back. You'll be moved by the stories of resilience and support that have shaped the lives of countless veterans at Rutgers University.
From empowering workshops to life-changing initiatives, Dennis Penny and his team have set a shining example of how a community can rally together for a meaningful cause.
Tune in to Spark.N.Stride as we celebrate the unwavering commitment of these remarkable individuals and gain insights into how we can make a difference in the lives of our veterans.
Don't miss this opportunity to be inspired and motivated to take action in your own communities. Let's spread the spirit of compassion and support far and wide!
Connect with Spark.N.Stride!
Instagram: https://instagram.com/spark.n.stride
Doing Good and Doing Well: Inspiring Helping Professionals to Become Leaders in Their Organizations https://a.co/d/4Ov5WG4
https://sparknstride.com/
http://instagram.com/spark.n.stride?igshid=zddkntzintm=
https://www.youtube.com/@spark.n.stride
Stay tuned for the next episode of Spark.N.Stride as we dive deep into the inspiring journey of Dennis Penny, a true advocate for the veteran community at Rutgers University! 🇺🇸
For the past six years, Dennis and his team have poured their hearts and souls into assisting our veterans, creating a positive impact that resonates with everyone they touch. Their passion for serving those who have served our country is truly awe-inspiring!
Hosted by the incredible retired Air Force veteran, Mach, this episode is a heartfelt exploration of dedication, camaraderie, and the power of giving back. You'll be moved by the stories of resilience and support that have shaped the lives of countless veterans at Rutgers University.
From empowering workshops to life-changing initiatives, Dennis Penny and his team have set a shining example of how a community can rally together for a meaningful cause.
Tune in to Spark.N.Stride as we celebrate the unwavering commitment of these remarkable individuals and gain insights into how we can make a difference in the lives of our veterans.
Don't miss this opportunity to be inspired and motivated to take action in your own communities. Let's spread the spirit of compassion and support far and wide!
Connect with Spark.N.Stride!
Instagram: https://instagram.com/spark.n.stride
Doing Good and Doing Well: Inspiring Helping Professionals to Become Leaders in Their Organizations https://a.co/d/4Ov5WG4
https://sparknstride.com/
http://instagram.com/spark.n.stride?igshid=zddkntzintm=
https://www.youtube.com/@spark.n.stride
I'm getting married on October 15th, so I'm just getting ready for that. You know the typical, but otherwise everything's good.
Speaker 1:Hey man, congrats on that dude. Congrats, how long have you been engaged?
Speaker 2:So I've been engaged for about like a year, but I've been with my fiance for about a total of six years six years.
Speaker 1:Wow, wow, man, that's a huge, that's a huge life event coming up.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, yeah. But you know, it's part of life, man, like I look at it, like my fiance actually posted something on her story. It was kind of along the lines of you know, we forget, you know. So it's like we wish for times where we had to worry about these kind of first world proms. So you know, I really can't complain about that, you know.
Speaker 1:What is the wedding cost right now?
Speaker 2:Well, right now we're trying to keep everything under like 20K. Okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because my logic is I'll get that money we can spend. I'd rather just buy a new house, you know at that point. So, and also too, like I look at it, like there's, you know, a lot of more. The most important thing is you know the union and the celebration so in our close friends. So that's what's more important to me than like a fancy, a stravagan, like hall and banquet. It's going to be nice, but you know like you don't have to spend $100,000 on a wedding to refer to be nice.
Speaker 1:No, I mean, listen, man, you could, but teach his own right. Like everyone, I mean, you got to get in, kind of like, where you're fitting. For us, it was a little different. So I was. I was previously married. I got married young, you know, when I joined the Air Force, and then my wife was also married earlier on. Believe it or not, man, like we, I got engaged to my wife as soon as I got back from Afghanistan. So this is like 2016.
Speaker 1:And life just kept getting in the way. Man, just like we started to like, kind of like, plan the wedding and it just something would come up. So like it was a. The first thing was like us moving out of the apartment in Manhattan and moving down to the shore full time. Then, shortly after that, we got pregnant. So then it was like, okay, so now the wedding, get low and behold, dude, like we didn't get married until last year, 2022. Dude, like we had every intention on getting things rolling, but for whatever reason, man, it was just always just something would come up. And then it was a COVID, and then it was the addition to our house. Man, it was just, it was. It just kept getting away from us. But so, yeah, man, that the planning, I don't. I don't envy that like what whatsoever.
Speaker 1:What was funny, though, is we ended up we went through all these different ideas. Oh, we could do a haul, we could do this plate per person, this kind of thing. We just went ahead with getting married in Puerto Rico. We have like friends of ours that are like in the hotel business and that kind of thing. There's a, there's a hotel that we stay at all the time while we're out there. It's the, the Marriott courtyard in East La Vella. We're a real nice place, super close to the airport, so, in any case, we ended up having it there, and, man, like I'm sure you're experiencing right Like you put one person's name on a piece of paper.
Speaker 1:You don't realize all the folks that are attached with that one name. So it's like oh wait, hold on a second, you're going to invite this person. No, no, no, no, no, no. You got to invite this person, you got to invite their mother, their father, and then, slowly but surely, it just starts to web out of control, which is what started with us.
Speaker 1:We went from. I want to say we were well over a hundred people and I'm just like that. It just doesn't make any sense, like the amount of money I just I'm more logical, kind of you know. So, ultimately, what we went with and I pissed off a lot of people, trust me, I pissed off a lot of people, but we it got down to I'm going to pick five, you're going to pick five, pick whatever five you want, but I'm going with five, you're going with five, and let's see, so five really means 10, right. So 10 on her side, 10 on my side is 20 and a few give and take here and there, which is ultimately what we went up, what we ended up doing.
Speaker 1:So I'm pissed off a lot of people a lot of people upset man, like we didn't get invited to your wedding. Yeah, I got it. But ultimately, guess what People forget about stuff. It's, you know, water underneath the bridge, pretty much. You put it on Facebook, everyone knows about it. It's Facebook. It's Facebook official.
Speaker 2:I'll get it done, dude, and I like to tell you what I think it's also a lot of pressure. There's so many pressures societal pressure, culture, right, certain cultures you had to have a big wedding to celebration. It's kind of the norm, the custom, and you know you're right, like even for us, like I was putting names down, that you know I told my fiance that's why, mary mouse, like I literally forget, that I'm forgetting people, and it's not people that I hate or don't like, it's just for some reason it's slipping my mind that I forgot this one person. I know it's gonna piss them off if I pick one person over the other.
Speaker 2:Another thing I factor in is what if I invite someone and the other person I invite don't necessarily get along? So now I have to worry about that. With the seating, make sure they're sitting over here, make sure that person's sitting over there. But to your point you're right, it's not about those people per se, it's about you and your partner.
Speaker 1:100% union 100%.
Speaker 2:At the end of the day, it's just us. It's like you and your partner. Those people who are coming to watch you celebrate. They're not gonna be there for the good times and the bad times, so they're gonna celebrate you essentially.
Speaker 1:Dude, 100%. Here's the other thing, right. I think sometimes we get caught up in these dilemmas, all these first world problems. Oh my God, I got a plan in a wedding. Thousands of dollars, who do I invite? That's a first world problem, right. But what happens when you don't? Just what would happen if you just did not have the funds to even entertain these other folks, right? Let's just say for Dennis what if you only had $5,000 for this wedding? What would you do? You would just have to figure it out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you'd have to figure it out. But also that's where the pressure comes in right, Because someone's gonna shame you for that. They're gonna be like right, that's how it goes. Like oh you're only spending $5,000 for your wedding. Were you a cheapskate?
Speaker 1:So yeah, so like I said there's pressure from it.
Speaker 2:I look at it like it doesn't matter what you do. Someone's always gonna say it's not good enough or how come you're not doing more or you're not spending a certain dollar amount? That means you don't value the person. That's all I like. Oh man yes.
Speaker 1:It's like shaming tactics.
Speaker 2:So it's like there's always gonna be somebody to say something negative about what you're doing in your life and I'm not gonna lie, depending on who says it, it could be detrimental to how you think, how you believe. But once you get older and you realize, those same people who are talking about you or saying why aren't you doing XYZ, they're not even helping you. So it's not like you're helping me do this and you're like, oh, I'm only spending $5,000. You're just critiquing me on what I'm doing.
Speaker 1:No value added, yeah, no value added, no value added. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:But I get it's hard man, because, like I said, we all do a pressure, even in the military right, Like there's a burden of performance, like we have to make rank, we have to study for this exam, we have to qualify, we have to do XYZ, and if you don't do that in a certain timeline there is a low level shame that comes with it, whether it's internalized or external right. So how come you didn't pick up E5 yet? You've been in for four years.
Speaker 2:How come you didn't get this qualification? There's people under you who got qualified, so it's like there's always a burden of performance in anything we do.
Speaker 1:Who's watching right? Who's watching man? How'd you meet your wife, or your wife to be? How'd you meet her?
Speaker 2:So actually I met her on a dating site. I met her on Bumble and that was the first time I went on Bumble. And the reason I went on Bumble is because you know I was working, you know I was going to school doing undergrad. I was like you know what. I kind of want to settle down again. I'm tired of like just dating and going on whatever I want to find my person and just kind of lock it in. And she was actually the first person I matched with on Bumble, surprisingly, and I was like okay, and then after that I just kind of went from there. So she's, my fiance, is from Egypt. Originally, she's a fifth grade math teacher and I love she's a good person. She's a good person, she's a poor smee. She just completed her doctorate program a little while ago, whoa. Right.
Speaker 2:Right, so now she's like you have to call me doctor.
Speaker 1:I was like let's let's, let's slow down with that, you know so so like in math, yeah, math, yeah, whoa, that's even.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's smart. Yeah, I tell her. Anytime we go out, you guys do the tip in your head because I don't, I don't do the numbers. They know I'm. I'm horrible at that, right.
Speaker 1:Like I passed the bill, like I'll pay and then I'll pass it over to my wife and she does the tip and everything.
Speaker 2:My wife is just. She actually taught me a good trick. I didn't know this until she taught me. She was Mary told me. Whenever you get your bill, the tip is always double the first digit.
Speaker 1:Double, double the first.
Speaker 2:So if the bill is 60, you want to leave $12.
Speaker 1:OK, that's the double, the first digit. What I was doing was I was doubling the tax.
Speaker 2:OK, you can probably do that too. Yeah, see, I'm not a math person. Yeah, because the tax is like what?
Speaker 1:like 8%, Right. So if you double it it's like 16%, I think that's, that's that's what I'm going to try. That one, the double, double the first digit. But I told my wife I checked this, I got this I'm sure you do this.
Speaker 2:But yeah, man, like I said, there's always going to be some kind of pressure. And it's hard too because, like I said, I think even with our military background we always have that low level burden performance. Right, it's like don't quit, Complete the task. Don't make excuses, right.
Speaker 2:Even if something's bothering, you don't make an excuse. You know, and I would say we're probably in doctrine that way. A lot of us, maybe even growing up in our environments, growing up in an inner city, you know if you're an athlete, right? Although even though they're kind of different, they're kind of similar in a sense. There's a low level of expectation for you like.
Speaker 2:Maybe you have to support your family, you know, maybe you know you're the first person in your family who's actually someone of a success outside of the family. You know whether you went to school, went to the military, you may rank. You're making more money maybe then your parents at this point.
Speaker 3:So there's always some level of burden, performance and sometimes you can get lost on that, you know, you can think oh well.
Speaker 2:I'm not doing enough, you know, or I should be doing more. Then we start comparing ourselves to others, right, it's like, well, mach is doing this you know, I started before him. I should be, you know, at a certain level, and we can't think that way. You know, Because everyone has their own journey. Like, what you had to do to get to the Air Force is completely different than someone else had to do to get to the Air Force. There might be what do you call it a legacy right.
Speaker 2:Maybe their father was a full-board colonel and now they're gonna join the Air Force, as opposed to someone who's like. You know what? I'm from, elizabeth. You know I'm from Berkeley Heights, I'm from the Bronx and I have no idea how I'm gonna pay for college. I'm gonna join the military.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, when I was a recruiter I got a chance to see all those different stories, right, because I mean, it's just so repetitive if you're seeing this one person with a legacy background, or repetitive in the sense that hey, man, like I'm just down and out on my luck, like my brother's in the Air Force, I owe my brother's in the Army, whatever it is, I need to change quickly this trajectory that I'm on because it's not in the right direction or whatever. So and then it comes down to like the qualifications. Right, qualifications change year to year, every fiscal year to fiscal year. I'm not sure what they are currently for the Air Force, but I do know that this past fiscal year it was tough for the Air Force to make its annual number recruiting number. I think the only other time that they've I don't know if they've missed, but I know one of the other times was when I joined in 99. In that year I guess we were like in a surplus with the economy, bill Clinton was in office and just they weren't hitting the target number. So but in terms of like numbers and stuff like that, like I've seen it where I've seen it where like things just get changed around man like just because, like they need to change. So someone would come in and be like, oh, we're gonna change the qualifying score to this and we're gonna change this. On that, qualifications change, like year to year for the most part. But back to what I was telling you in terms of like you get a chance to see all these different stories of folks that come in, right, like one of the first people I put in the Air Force, like her grandfather was in the Air Force, right, so there was already like this legacy well, my grandfather was in, I wanna come in. But again, the qualifications were different. For clearly, when he was coming in, as to like what was going on in 2009, 2010, when I was doing it, it's just very different. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:One of the big things or the misconceptions at the time was folks would come in and they would think that they're gonna leave to basic training tomorrow and this was like, no, no, no, it doesn't work that way. Like here's what has to happen. First, here's the breakdown you gotta get qualified, you gotta go take an academic exam the ASVAP at the time and then you gotta do your medical, and now you're just hurry up and waiting, which is our term. Right, you're waiting to leave to basic training. So what would happen is for, like a recruiter, when these folks have made it all the way through, like the medical portion and the academic portion, and they're qualified like they have a job, they're just waiting to leave to basic training.
Speaker 1:Now you're required to meet with these folks monthly, at least once a month. You gotta get their height and their weight, make sure that their qualifications haven't changed. Now multiply that by like I don't know, or at one time I had like 40, 50 people, so I would have to meet with 50 people monthly. I'd have to break it down 25 in the earlier part of the month and then 25 towards the end of the month, because there's just too many people to cause.
Speaker 1:You're supposed to also speak to these folks and have some sort of a rapport with them and that kind of thing. You know what I mean. Because ultimately, if it takes six to eight months to get them into basic training, should anything change with this high school young adult, young, 20, should anything change with this person? And they do not go to basic training? They do not leave, they put on too much weight, they get arrested, they have some speeding tickets, they mess up their credit. Whatever happens within these eight months that you're responsible for, whatever being a mentor to this person, a supervisor, it falls back on the recruiter and dude, like that's like that's super stressful.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, you want to talk about pressure.
Speaker 1:Man like you. Just you know, and I've mentioned it on here before, and I had a buddy of mine, he was also, he was a Marine recruiter and we just talk about what we reflect back on when we were in it and kind of like going through it, and we look back and like, dude, like could you picture letting that level of stress get to you? But to your point there's this level of pressure because you have to perform, you know, and you have people watching and there's numbers involved and all this kind of thing. I don't miss it at all. Much respect to all of the military recruiters out there right now. Just that's a hard billet. Man Going through it, man Going through it.
Speaker 1:You know, I had a young lady one time. You know, I get her in. She's in the Air Force, she's gonna leave in a I don't know like in a few months. So now you start building this rapport. So she was in a long-term relationship with a guy I never really got. I don't think I ever met the guy. But anyway, long story short, I get a call on like a Sunday night, probably like 10 o'clock at night. It's my recruiter phone. So I answer it's the young lady. I'm not gonna share her name. So this young lady literally just got beat up by her boyfriend, like she just got beat up, right. So she got beat up and she's she is locked in a closet in her apartment. This is the phone call that I get as a and when I tell you, recruiters deal with all kinds of stuff, dude like. So I get this phone call, so I don't know what to do. She's getting ready to leave in like two weeks. So there's like this two week like window, right.
Speaker 1:So first thing on my mind is like I gotta get her to some kind of safety, right. So I'm like, hey, just, can you just grab your important papers, like don't even worry about clothes, makeup, you could buy all that, just your documents. You're gonna need your documents, right. So I drive out to where she's living. It was somewhere out in, like I was out in like Amboy somewhere. It was like in the hood. It was dark Sunday. Now by the time I get out there now it's like 11 o'clock at night. So I get her to sneak out of the apartment, get her stuff. I don't know where the guy is. So she sneaks out, gets into my car. So now I have to figure out where to take her. Where do I take her right? So anything revolving involving a recruiter and an applicant, especially like opposite sex kind of thing, dude, that is the sure way to end your career.
Speaker 2:Oh sure, for sure, for sure. Fraternization yeah.
Speaker 1:Oh, dude, like right. So like, what do I do? So you know, lo and behold, like I do, let her stay at my apartment for like three days until I could figure out, like, what to do with her. You know what I mean. So I had a female flight mate and the female flight mate helped me out. You know, ultimately, the female flight mate lets her stay at her apartment until it's time for her to leave. We're good friends to this day. She's married, she has two kids and she's thriving right, like she's been in the Air Force over 10 years. But that night, I mean, I wasn't sure what to do, like what if I would have drove over there and like would have been confronted by the guy, god only knows what could have happened. You know what I mean. But being a recruit is no joke, man.
Speaker 2:That's a tough job, no, for real. And I think even you made a point about retention. Even now retention is kind of low because we have a lot of guardsmen recruiters on our campus and they're telling you know, you've been telling me like retention is low and a big reason why retention low currently is the younger people. Well, there's a lot of variables, but they say the younger people aren't as patriotic as like our generation is, so they're kind of like I don't want to, you know, be involved in any kind of danger for this country as of today. Another reason is because a lot of these younger people are making way more money not even going to school, just whatever field they're working in and they're looking at like well, why would I do that when I'm already making like 60K, 70k?
Speaker 2:So we started seeing a lot of the bonuses, increasing a lot of the incentive as far as okay, because I remember when I joined they only give you like 10,000 or like 15,000, something like that. Now they're getting 60,000. You know 50,000 with, you know specific rates, you know et cetera, and even that is not working. Like offering $60,000 for a sign on bonus isn't enough for these guys now because they're making so much money. So they're trying to find new ways to incentivize and that's why you're seeing now a lot of podcasts, a lot of social media.
Speaker 2:We have a guardsman recruiter who has like 100,000 followers on TikTok and she uses that for, like, army recruiting and she's like she's 26. She just made staff sergeant in 26. She's young but she's killing on TikTok right now. So you know, at that point the army is like oh, roger, that just keep doing it. You know, so you're going to start seeing a lot more social media as influencers who are military and that might even be like the position moving forward, right, having a PR person, just like for TikTok or Instagram something like that.
Speaker 1:I think that that'd be interesting to see how that kind of like plays out right, just to see what comes of that. How do they utilize social media to bet? I mean, because, listen, when I was a recruiter, facebook was very brand new. Literally, dennis, literally one year. It's like hey, you better not be interacting with applicants on Facebook. Okay, then it went to you need to be interacting with your applicants on Facebook. Oh, and, by the way, your your office, you have to register for a Facebook page for your recruiting office. So now, so now there's like a whole social media thing, part of it. Who runs that? Who is in charge of that social media page or outlet platform? The recruiter is. So it's interesting, man, I could only imagine, like what, what comes of it? You know, I never thought about that part, though. Like having a recruiter with enough following that they're an influencer, I mean you'd be surprised it makes sense it's wild Right.
Speaker 2:It's really, really wild if you think about it Right and time to changing right and even unfortunately, the military has its customs and its core values and it tries to stay as in line with the core values, but a lot of those core values are outdated, respectfully. Right.
Speaker 2:Sometimes you got to adapt and overcome the one thing the military preaches Sometimes it fails to do because it wants to stay in line with the core values. But you know the applicants are changing. You know the sense of on a courage and commitment may not necessarily be as strong as it was, like in my era, like I'm the 9-11 era. So there's a lot of people who joined just because of 9-11. That was a sole purpose 9-11. Oh, you attack my country, I'm joining. I remember when I went in my recruiter he texted me. He was like I got guys who were in in like 88 and got out and they were like, you know, you're trying me back up. You're like, sir, you're 60. Cut it out, yeah, but they were ready Like these guys are just ready to come back, you know. So, unfortunately, sometimes it takes a tragedy for you know people to get, you know riled up and have camaraderie. The same thing with Ukraine. Right, it's one thing to be like, oh, I'm going to war, but it's one thing if someone's attacking where you're from.
Speaker 2:Like I was like I was joke Red Dawn would never happen in the United States. It would never happen. We're not just going to sit here and just let you hang on, dennis, hang on a second.
Speaker 1:Can you explain what Red Dawn is?
Speaker 2:So for the listeners you might be familiar with a little season. So there was an original. I believe it came in the 80s but they made a reboot early 2000,. But we'll just go based on the original. So Red Dawn was a story of North Korea and Russia basically invading the United States. Like they got past our satellites, they got, you know, past everything and there was literally boots on the ground of Russian shoulders and North Korean soldiers taking over towns in the United States. So think of your local town and we'll say where you're from. Right here currently, you see paratrooping Russians and North Koreans landing, kicking your homes, taking your stuff, attacking the police and we're just overtaken.
Speaker 1:So one part that I did not know. I did not know that North Korea was in the hour we sort of was Russia.
Speaker 2:I think the newer one had North Korea and Russia, but the original one was just Russia.
Speaker 1:So one of the coolest scenes in that movie is like these high school kids in high school like they're daydreaming. Well, I think it's the girl, the girl's daydreaming. She's looking out the window and all of a sudden you start seeing like people paratrooping into the field and they're like what, what's going on out there? That's wild.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I mean, that's the point. Like imagine you're saying that won't ever happen.
Speaker 2:That would never happen. Yeah, never, like we're not. We're so indoctrined we're not just going to let people do that to us, and that's what's kind of going on in Ukraine, and I like to think. I think Russia overplayed their hand because they probably thought I'm just going to go into a small country and just take over them, like they did in Crimea. But there's something about someone, even someone, breaking into your home. You're not just going to. You don't matter how many people are coming. You're not going to let someone just come in and potentially harm you and your family. That's one thing about Americans. I'll give us credit when our backs against the wall. That's kind of when we're like the most dangerous.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for sure, yeah, man.
Speaker 2:That's when the camaraderie comes to that point. So it's just interesting to see like the whole dynamic with that.
Speaker 1:I just think we're kind of like whatever these other countries, if they're ever thinking something along those lines, I think it'd be more like infrastructure based first. But we're being light about this with the movie and stuff. America's too hood.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:You're not about to come here with no bullshit, especially Texas. Forget about it. Oh, get out of here.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, no, no, no no no. There's some hood cats somewhere in this country. They're like I wish.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I wish they would, I wish they would Right Show up. Yeah, yeah, pop out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like I don't know man. Good luck, we're going to end on that end. Yeah, there's just. We just got too many pockets of like hood shit going on. You're not about to. The cops can't even go into some of these neighborhoods. You think Russia's going to power? Good luck, not happening.
Speaker 2:No, but to your point and that's why you're seeing now, especially with infrastructure, that's I would say that's part of our biggest weakness now the infrastructure, because we're so dependent on technology. In 2023, the simplest inconvenience with the power grid will shut us. I remember when Sandy happened. Remember when Sandy happened? Yeah. That was the closest like the apocalypse that you could probably see.
Speaker 1:So I, just I had just missed Sandy, like, like, literally missed about like a few weeks. So I moved to Denver, colorado, and I'm unpacking in Denver and I'm watching the TV, watching everything going on in New Jersey. I'm like New York, new Jersey. I'm like man, like I barely I just missed that. Yeah, like people were like rationing, like gas and floodings right.
Speaker 2:No power, you couldn't store food, and it's interesting to see how civilized people can become uncivilized. One civilization kind of breaks down, unfortunately. You know, it's like we like to think we're civilized, but how civilized are we really when we have no power? You know we have no heat, no AC, no access to gas, like, unfortunately, their animal instincts come out, survival at that point, survival yeah.
Speaker 2:People were being nasty to people, stealing cans of gas, not caring. So it's. It's infrastructure That'll be the real downfall, and I think that's why you're seeing a lot of tech being boosted up, Even even in our, our fields of the military, Intel. A lot of people dismiss Intel because, oh, it's just whatever. Whatever Intel saves lives.
Speaker 2:I'm an Intel guy, so I get it. Intel saves lives. That's a really wrong Intel Like you to make or break the mission you know. So I like to tell even the students at Rutgers. I tell all of my students. It sounds corny, but everything we've learned in the military is keeping us alive today, in 2022.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a really good point you know, attention to detail, keep your head on the swivel, misinformation, OPSEC, all these things. We got to pay attention to that kind of take for granted because it's like, oh, we're not in a in a war zone, or we're not training, we're not in the field, but we're hit with misinformation every day.
Speaker 2:You know we're dealing with people who may not have the best intentions for us and they're telling us things to Kind of get our resources or you know, get close to us so they can manipulate us or do harm, whatever it is like we have to pay attention to what's going on the world, because it's you know, times are changing, things are changing, so we got to be a little bit more Cognitive of what's going on and how we receive information.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, like even to this day, right now, I have a bug out bag. Yeah, like right now, I have a bug out bag.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I tell you what I think that you are. I think you're crazy for that. They're probably like why do you have that?
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah my wife is the first one to call me crazy, like she'll say it in Spanish, but there is the equivalent. Like there he goes again and trying to invent something, something new. But but guess what? We have these drills. Like we drill like once a month Should something happen. You know, I always try to keep one of the cars Filled with gas, at least one completely filled. And she's like, why do you always? I'm like Dude, like got for this, something happens. If there's a storm that comes through here, we're gonna need to be able to charge our phones and kind of thing. Like you want to at least have one of the cars filled with gas. The other part of it.
Speaker 1:We had got some Crazy winds like a few months ago over here. I mean real crazy to the point that the family is calling the family's like hey, like where are you? Guys are like we're having dinner. They're like no, you have to get somewhere safe. You got to get somewhere low. You got it. So I don't have a basement, I have a crawlspace, but we do have this area underneath the stairs where we keep for, like, christmas storage.
Speaker 1:I had to like move all this stuff out, grab the bug out bag and, like we all went underneath the staircase in the inside this little cubby, until the winds like it was like knocking down houses and stuff like that. My daughter was like a little nervous but in the bug out bag I had MREs meals ready to eat. I had, you know, I have water in there. I had a first aid kit. I had a crank, radio, had a flashlight. And then my wife's like oh, like it's kind of cool that you have that. I'm like, yeah, this is why we right, you know, you know when you stay ready, you don't got to get ready. You know what I mean. So man wants to ask you something. Dennis, you mentioned Rutgers. How did you get involved into like what you're doing now at Rutgers?
Speaker 2:So, so originally so when I got the Navy in 2009, I want to say 2009, maybe early 2010, it was kind of like November, december, okay, when I got out. So I got out and I told myself I was like, okay, you know, I'll just get a job. I honestly I was kind of naive when I got out. It's become a cop or something. I was applied police department They'll pick me up, whatever right and I was applying to multiple police apartments and I wasn't getting pretty much no hits back like I was no love, no love.
Speaker 1:I was in my view.
Speaker 2:I'm a combat vet, I'm thinking all. I'm good to go and the biggest drawback and Feedback I heard back from any employer, not just law enforcement, was I have no degree. So on my head.
Speaker 2:I'm like you talking about. Okay, I know I have a degree, but I have all these years of military experience and that's one that kind of the switch went off where I was like, oh well, I'm looking at myself as this 27 year old Service member who did all these accolades. They're looking at me like a 27 year old guy with the high school diploma. Mmm.
Speaker 2:So at that point I was like you know, I have to go to school after At least get a degree in something so I can compete with everyone else. So I ended up going to school for criminal justice originally. So I got my associates in criminal justice and then when I went to switch schools To my four-year school, I was actually gonna go to Rutgers first, but then there was like a college fair At Middlesex County College, so it was Rutgers University and it was New Jersey City University. So I just happened to walk past in New Jersey City University first and there was the professor, the lead chairs I believe it was Dr Zeka and it was also dr Krantz, and I believe they were both in law enforcement, they were both detectives and their respective cities. So I want to say one was like South Brunswick and the other one was maybe freehold, something like that for years, a while ago.
Speaker 2:Okay, and you know I was talking about something as, yeah, you know, I was in the military for eight years, you know combat, that I'm security clearance, and they're like, oh well, we have a national security Degree program here. I was like, oh, I was like, what is that? It's like, it's kind of like criminal justice, but essentially it's more of the intel side. So it's like risk management, you know, introduction to Intel. So basically, is more of the intel side of criminal justice, not just the, you know, boost on the ground aspect, it's more of the Intel backgrounds, risk management, things like that.
Speaker 1:It's like, oh, that's interesting to me, and this is at the middle. This is at Middlesex County.
Speaker 2:Yeah, mrs County College. Yeah, but NJCU just happened. They had a fair there for the colleges. So all these college like Rowan was there all these colleges I just happened to come across, and JC, you first someone I was telling them my story. That was military. They're like well, with the national security degree, if you come, if you transfer over here, based on your military record and your JST will give you 36 credits Towards your degree. I was like Roger that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what do I sign? I didn't mean, I didn't know disrespect, no shade Rutgers.
Speaker 2:But I didn't go to Rutgers because at that point I was like they're giving me 36 credits towards my degree and in my head, well, that's a year off my degree, that's one more year. The quicker I could start working, so that my whole mindset was hurry to get this degree.
Speaker 2:Right and then transfer. So in the meanwhile, while I was going to school, is actually a work study at Middlesex County College and the two coordinators Paul is our role and Dave Bremmer they're also army vets. So when I first started going to Middlesex I'd even there was no veteran services at all. It was just some lady in the registrar. I had to give her my certificate of eligibility for my GI Bill benefits and she just certified it and I think my second semester. She told me hey, you have to go to veteran services. I was like what are you talking about? I said there's no veteran services here.
Speaker 2:I've been here for like a year and a half. I've never heard of them. So they're like oh, they're offices around the corner, so they must have been Transitioning in a time that I went to creating the actual office because I know about it.
Speaker 2:So when I went there that's what I met Paul and Dave. They kind of took me under the wing and I was actually one of the first work studies at Middlesex County College For veteran services. So they actually taught me everything that they knew as far as, like, how to use a GI Bill, any VA educational benefits, any VA benefits as far as disability you know the things they really don't teach us when we Process out the military because you know we don't learn that stuff until it's too late. So once I learned that I Actually got a job. So I graduated, got my degree and I actually got a job at Middlesex County College because Paul and Dave went on to work for the VA. So I got the assistant coordinator position and then they hired a new Director who happened to be a retired Air Force officer. So I did that for a year and then Wow, so hang on.
Speaker 1:So all of this stuff is just kind of like Coming together for you just you're meeting one person and you know, you know what I think. What I Think that, while you're saying all of this, what you're not describing at all is your attitude towards any of this. You're making it sound very easy, you're making it.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, yeah, it wasn't easy.
Speaker 1:It was just Dennis, you're making it sound like, yeah, I just did this and this and this, but I could almost guarantee you that had to be like a level of like Resiliency and like your attitude. You, you've. You had to have had a good attitude or a positive attitude Towards what it was you were trying to accomplish, because it doesn't come that easy. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, I hear what you're saying, I know you're right and I think the reason I think that way is because, like I said, we're in doctrine, right, we're. I'm used to going into a new facility or a new building having to learn some material. Get it done, they'll make excuses, right. That's part of our military training, Just kind of bang the bang it out you know, and To your point, it wasn't easy and it was so long ago.
Speaker 2:I feel like You're right, because I feel like at one point I was struggling. You know, when I got the military like 27, 28 I had to go back to school. You know, I'm horrible at math, you know, so I had to get these remedial classes.
Speaker 1:Which is why you're marrying right.
Speaker 2:That's why my wife's gonna be a math major, so I have everything covered. Oh, my goodness. So, mary, my appreciation to you and and, um, we know it was difficult because, like I said that and it, you know I was circled back to the pressure. You know that, that pressure to perform, you know, in my head I was like man, I've been on combat missions, I'm repelling helicopters, you know I've been in Iraq. All this cool stuff I did and I came to solve this basic math problem.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm and it's humbling. You know I'm sitting there like I can't figure out algebra, I can't do it, and that's where the mentors coming. You know Paul and Dave, you know the people at veteran services at the time who are assisting me, because they kind of went through that process, you know. And then One thing I like about the military is we do have that camaraderie and no one gets left behind. And I think that's something we can all agree on, regardless of the branch, regardless of the era. We don't leave anybody behind. So if we see our fellow airmen, our fellow sailor, marine soldiers struggling, we're gonna make sure we circle back and, you know, get them screwed away. And I did have a lot of help, as far as you know, staying on track, letting you know them, letting me know, hey, man, we went through the same process as you, we get it. And I think that's what I use today when I'm here, being here at Rutgers, I have to remember that at one point that was me getting out the military, having no idea what to do, being frustrated.
Speaker 2:You know, being upset because there is a title to it. You know you, you're a E5, your E6, your sergeant, your petty officer, you give him be a lieutenant or a captain, and get out the military and for so many years as your identity. Yeah, like you were the tech sergeant. You know you were the first sergeant for years and now you're just much.
Speaker 2:Yep you know. So it's kind of, it's kind of humbling so, and we're so used to being in charge and taking charge of things. It's you almost feel helpless in the situation that you're starting over, and that's where that support system comes from. That's where your family comes in, that's where your wife comes in, you know, that's where your siblings, your, you know your battle buddies, that's where they all come in, the kind of bring you to where you need to be. And we have to remember that, even though we are starting over, life isn't over, right this is the military was just one chapter of our life that we completed.
Speaker 2:And this new chapter whether it's education, whether it's a new field, whether it's media, podcast right this new section of our life is just one component that's gonna make us better. I had to think about my military training as a catalyst To make me dedicated to what I have to do in my real life as a civilian. You know everything we learn and you know and we're gonna fall. You know we're gonna fail at things like I remember I failed classes. I'm not gonna lie. I I failed classes. I failed classes. I can't do this. I can't do this.
Speaker 2:I end up graduating with a three nine, with my bachelor's right and I never thought in my head someone who failed classes like math. I had to take math like two or three times because I just I couldn't get it. Everything else I was getting a's and b's in, but the masters wasn't hitting and I had to tell myself I say what am I doing wrong that I'm not getting this math? And it was humbling. I was a guy. I had to get tutoring. I have to get tutoring at.
Speaker 2:I had this 19 year old girl tutoring me in the library on On Wednesday is when I was dead tired, but I was like, you know, I have to do something. So One thing, like I said, I'm grateful for the military is they. They give us a foundation not to fail. You know, even if we think we can't do it, we just keep, you know, pushing forward and we do it and eventually you'll get it. So I have to use that kind of mindset and mantra from my students and what I do every day to make sure that, yeah, I get it. Man, you're dirty, you got a wife and kid, you're not making the money you used to, you're going to school, you have this engineering and stressful, I get it, but you have resources now to help you and also, you're not doing it alone.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's one of the things I I miss the most I wouldn't say the most, but there's a lot of things I miss but being able being in a training environment with, with a group of folks, whether it be like like a basic training or an academic, like a sit-down kind of a Academy type of thing, instinctively, what is the message that's brought down to us is Together, teamwork, get it. You know, at no point in none of those schoolings, no, those environments, is it like You're gonna do this by yourself. You can't ask for help. You it's never been like that.
Speaker 1:And what's cool about that is, as you take that with you into, like the operational military, a Lot of your friends and your folks, like you guys, will figure things out to get like. No one will leave until you got to figure it out right, and everyone has a strength, everyone brings. Everyone has a weakness too, right. So it's kind of cool seeing how you know when you're learning about group dynamics, right, like the, the storming, performing right, like that whole, that whole aspect. I'm not sure how the Navy does it.
Speaker 2:We have something similar like.
Speaker 1:So it's just these different group dynamics, these different elements to group dynamics, knowing that when you all come together is not gonna be perfect. There's gonna be some storming, which is like folks, you know, maybe like bickering or trying to get their idea across. And then there's a. There's a norming part of it where you kind of like Jelling, kind of like trying to figure out, and then a performing, and there's a. There's another initial step that I'm, that I'm I'm drawing a blank on, but ultimately Coming together as a team, getting things accomplished. Now you transition into a Different part of your life where there's gonna be a full-time student or you're gonna be a full-time student and a Father and a husband and hold down a full-time job. Trying to figure out that transition cannot be easy.
Speaker 1:For me, when I got off of active duty in 2016 and went into the reserve component, that first year Was really hard for me, just really, really tough. And if it wasn't for us having my daughter, I was. I was a stay-at-home dad for three years. But having my daughter and being a stay-at-home dad, dad gave me, I felt, purpose. So fast-forward, current day as I make my official exit and retirement, you know, out of the Air Force. I didn't want to Repeat that again, that repeat the, the struggle in the transition, being unsure, trying to find Purpose or passion or anything like that, and that's how a lot of this, that's how a lot of this came up spark and stride.
Speaker 1:Well, what is spark and stride? Okay, what does it look like? What does it sound like? Ultimately, what are you trying to accomplish, right? So, as a first sergeant, being charged with the health, morale and welfare of all unit members, it's like, well, I've been doing this for such a long time. I think this is the area of focus that I want to Continue to move forward with, and that's how kind of like spark and stride.
Speaker 2:No, and, like I said, but that's also terrifying, right, like it's terrifying to say. You know what? I'm gonna start my own podcast in a world of podcasts right.
Speaker 2:So, but to your point, yet start from somewhere. You know you have to start with that first. Guess that first listener. That one listener turns into 10, that 10 turns into 20. You share the post. Oh wow, who's this guy? Let me follow him, you know. So, yeah, have to start from somewhere, I think it's. It's. It's terrifying to start because you're comparing yourself to other people. Right, you're comparing yourself to someone who might have like 10,000 followers or 20, but oh yeah, at one point they had one Yep, you know yeah yeah, start from.
Speaker 2:Somewhere.
Speaker 1:You know, you know what's been really interesting about this entire journey with spark and stride as a podcast and, ultimately, as a production company. The amount of folks who have been reaching out to me Dude, like I don't clearly I know how they're getting a hold of me is is social media, but you don't. You don't think to yourself like, oh man, like 14,000 people watch this one video, like holy smokes. That's In my mind, that's a lot. Maybe to someone listening they're like, oh, 14,000. Who cares? You know, I'm getting millions of views. Well, that's that's mind blowing in itself to me.
Speaker 1:But just to have this, believe it or not, the, the naysayers, have been the closest people to me For some odd reason, like the closest ones, and I don't know if it's just candid conversation or trying to. You know, I Don't know what it is, to be quite honest, the positive, the positive reinforcement. There's been this there's pockets of folks that are very close to me that Reciprocate this positivity but, to be quite honest, it's folks that I don't even know. Man, people direct messaging me hey, man, love this, thank you, needed to hear that. Hey, like, how did you get started? Just all these, all this kind of like Inquisitive, like positivity you know what I mean which I had. I was not prepared for that. No, I tell you what.
Speaker 2:No one they don't teach you how to be Successful. You know, like, how to deal with the, the aftermath of the success, right? So, and I tell you what I? I think there's two reasons to for the naysayers this is my personal opinion. So I also have my own radio show that I do at Rutgers, called the veterans corner, and it's it's funny because you, you telling your story I can, it's relatable and that's what I do.
Speaker 2:It's relatable and that's the one thing. It's relatable, right, if there's a lot of people who have things to say but they don't have a voice and you just happen to be that voice and it's like, oh damn, you know what. But Macha's saying that's right, because I experienced that. So it's relatable. I like what you're doing. I'm gonna share this and show to other people who might be like mighty, like me. So, to your point, it's the reason you're getting all that positive feedback, because the content you're producing is relatable in some way, some form or fashion that hits home to somebody who's listening to that. Maybe they had a similar experience, maybe you remind them of someone, maybe you remind them of an uncle or brother or father you know, Maybe you remind them of someone that mentioned them in the military.
Speaker 2:You know it's, it's all relatable. So you're getting that positive feedback from people who relate to your story, who relate to what you're saying. Another reason for the naysayers because, to my point earlier, there's always gonna be that one or two people who say you can't do something because they can't do it themselves. Mm-hmm. So just because, well, who does he think he is with his podcast, sir, you would never even start. You're outside the club complaining about you. Came to get in the club, you know, so at that point right.
Speaker 2:It's like you're complaining from the outside oh how come he's on XYZ when the person who's actually doing it Isn't saying anything? So it's a double S sword. You're gonna have those people who are, I don't want to say, envious, but there there is a low level of envy, because you know they want to do what you can do. This can't, for whatever reason, whether it's fear, whether it's lack of resources, whether it's, you know, personality, even talking right like.
Speaker 2:Public speaking isn't popular for most people because they don't. Most people don't like talking, especially don't like talking about themselves or a topic, because they feel whether it's shamed or you know, someone's gonna critique them. But especially in this business, when it comes to podcast and media, you have to have some level of fixed skin because you can have the best episode ever. Million views Someone's gonna hit that, not like button. Mm-hmm not like, not like just for the sake of I don't like that fuck that guy. Yeah, I don't like that so.
Speaker 2:You have to focus on the positives, you have to focus on the people that you're reaching. I look at it like life kind of Humbles us and life shows us what we're really doing. Even if it is 2000, guess what? It could be zero. That would be more detrimental to me than like, oh, I only got 2000.
Speaker 2:So yeah some people put a lot of content and they get like 10 views, 20, because you know it doesn't look a certain way. What I like, what you do and I can say this from a media standpoint is there's three things that really catch me with with your content. One, the visuals. We live in a we live in a visual a's where if it's eye popping is catching, like your videos or clips are very catching, they're very trendy, it catches my eye. So that's one thing. The relatability, the content you put out, as far as the stories, the relatable people you have on the show. That's another draw. And the other draw is your military background. So between military, the content you put out, that's military surrounded, and the visuals. That's why people watch, you know you can thank you man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no problem. And, like I said, you could have someone who puts out a similar podcast, similar content, and they have no personality and they just kind of just think. So you have to have some kind of niche and or Personality to do these kind of things because, like I said, public speaking is for everybody, that people get terrified, like you know it is. You interview somebody, they're like yeah, you know the lights. You know the nervous, but you do it after a while, just like the military.
Speaker 2:I don't know why you keep doing, keep doing it, it's normal.
Speaker 1:Yeah, man, for some reason, I don't know what it is man like. So when folks sit down and and for the most part these of Listen, listen, these are folks that are articulate, smart, you know, have a background, have have companies or not, probably whatever it is, for some reason, when the lights and cameras go on, it folks like freeze up a little bit. I'm just like, hey, like you know, I relax.
Speaker 2:You circle back to that pressure, right? The pressure to perform. Yes, I have to make sure I don't sound stupid. I make sure I'm looking in the camera correctly. I have to make sure I don't say anything that might implicate me later. You know I have, and I have students that Went on to do other things, like I'm a student of mine who literally works for Fandall. Like she graduated. She works for Fandall, right? Now.
Speaker 2:I would love to have her on the show, but I can't have her on my show because she can't talk about Fandall, because the gambling thing, so she can't really talk about it, right? So I can have her on, but also she has to be mindful. Yes, I would like to go on Dennis's show, but I also can't put my job at Jeopardy for talking about something that may or may not get flagged, because Fandall doesn't want me to do it. So that's also part of it, right?
Speaker 2:So you have to kind of Be mindful of your audience and you also have to be mindful of your personal life right, like you don't want to just, like I said, we live in the age of misinformation and people just say things for the sake of saying them, so we have to make sure that we're responsible enough to protect ourselves and also whatever entity you know be represented. Like I tell people all the time, like even for me, even with my social media and my Instagram, I can't post certain things, and the reason I can't post certain things is because I'm a representation of the university, not to brag, but if you Google my name, dennis Penny Rutgers is the first thing that pops up. At that point, like Rutgers pops up, the office pops up.
Speaker 2:So I have to be mindful what I say, how I treat people in public, because it's, even when I say something, right, because if I say something negative, it's not gonna be like oh Dennis says something, it's gonna be this guy who works at Rutgers University, oh yeah, said XYZ, oh yeah, and now Rutgers must think the way he thinks because he works for them. So I really have to be mindful of what I say and what I do.
Speaker 2:even with my Instagram, the Rutgers New Brunswick verify page, they follow me. I have no idea who's watching that page. It could be a vice chancellor, it could be a grad student big time.
Speaker 2:So I can't post Reckless things on my page I can't say, oh, the university is stupid, I can't do these things because, to your point, you never know who's watching. So we all have someone that we represent. But also I'm also representing myself, right, like I don't want to say anything that may be taken out of context. But, like I said, we live in a world where I can say, oh well, I don't think, well, you're wrong, because? But it on dislike, dislike, dislike.
Speaker 2:You know so, not even with the media thing, you have to have some level of toughness and you have to know that, no matter what you do, no matter how perfect your podcast is, how great the visuals are, the guests, there's always gonna be that, that small percentage of people who just say you know what this guy sucks, I don't like his stuff. Or, man, he's corny, I could do a better podcast. But meanwhile you're not even doing anything, you're just complaining about. You're watching me complaining about it, right, you know? You know it's funny, man.
Speaker 1:It's like this whole entire thing was it's really wild because it's how organic is just been. Just, there's so many picking up on me, there's so many pick anything in here, pick anything in terms of like the content, and I and I could go into like this whole organic Way, like it started, you know, which is kind of cool because in my opinion it's it only goes up. Right, it should go up if you're consistent and you're, you'd you have some sort of a blueprint that you're that you're Putting together. Right, because I don't have the blueprint. I honestly don't. I have. What I've done thus far and again it's been organic, it's been growing on its own. So in terms of like visuals and all that kind of thing, man, that's just that's been a little bit of, a little bit of hard work, a little bit of fortitude, some resiliency.
Speaker 1:You know, it's just constant and I'm so open to to criticism too. You know, I think one of the things that especially you know, being in the military for such a long time, one of the things that a good leader, I think can do, is Two things they can delegate, but they can also take constructive feedback right, one of the things that I would do, whenever I would apply for any kind of like high-level position or just any position, I would always get a Letter of recommendation from one of my troops, always, yeah, so like if it was like a, let's just say they say, hey, like you have an option for like Optional three letters of recommendation. I would get my immediate supervisor and I'd get someone who's supervised me in the past, something like that, but I would always get one from a lower ranking troop within my organization.
Speaker 2:That's actually smart because you could see from their perspective how they, how they view you. You know, especially with leadership you know, and. We can laugh about this now, but I think we both experience bad leadership in our careers and our military careers, and guaranteed you know, and To your point.
Speaker 2:We can take it one or two ways. We can either say this is the type of leader I want to be or this is the type of leader I don't want to be. And I Even welcome the bad leadership experience because I tell myself when I'm in a leadership position, that's how not to be. You know, we grew up in the era of just knife hand and do what I say. That's it, no questions. Do what I say. Now we have to be mindful of people's personalities. You know their situations, where they come from, their culture. You have to be a little bit more tolerant, and those things also make up a good leader. You know, good leader just doesn't do what I say because I say so. You know, Good leader is inspiring. You know your support and it's to follow you, you know. You know they trust you with their lives, you know. So. You know being inspirational is better to me than being fearful.
Speaker 1:I think, and in a, I think, in line with what you just mentioned in terms of, like the era that we came up in right now, if you can, if you can explain to your Troops this younger generation of military member, if you can explain to them or get them to understand the why, you get, you have their buy-in. It's, it's what we came from, where there's no explaining why. I don't have time for that. This is what I need you to do. Do it go right here. It just takes like a little bit, just a little bit more effort to Get them to understand the why.
Speaker 1:If they understand the why, dude, like and I think that's the struggle, right, because you have this one, one generation of service member who's been in for a while, like you and I have been in, is like no, no, you do what I tell you to do. You right, I don't have time to explain to you. You have to trust and what I'm telling you to do, that's it and you need that. You need that right, like on the on the battlefield Frontline. I don't have time to explain to you the why, right. So, place and time, you know that also goes into it. But ultimately, man, if you can really on, if they can understand, if they can formulate what is your expression to them and and them have their their why? I Think that's right now like a big disconnect between the generations of service member.
Speaker 2:Yeah, definitely, even even the standards are changed, like I remember when I was in, like tattoos are really like taboo. Like they were like above the elbow. They're not. Show now full sleeve. You'll see commanders with like neck tattoos and this way sleep now.
Speaker 2:So the times are changing and, to your point, we do have to be a little bit more tolerant of the younger duration, like I. I Was telling myself you know, I don't want to be that old guy who's complaining about young people, but at one point I was the young person being complaining about by the old people, you know. So we have to take the meat and spit out the bones you know, we have to make it realized.
Speaker 2:Yes, times are changing. This is a different Level of service member that we're engaging with, and they have a whole slew of problems that we never had to deal with, you know, even with the internet. The internet really wasn't big when I was in the military. I think we had a well at the time like a little chat or aim or something like that, but it wasn't really like online posting photos and do all this stuff.
Speaker 2:I rarely have any photos of myself in the military outside the country, realistically like stateside, yes, but like outside the country. I have no photos of myself like out of the country, not just because you know, obviously I'll sec, but just because we didn't think to be taking selfies in the desert. That was like a thing for us.
Speaker 1:I think I think too right, like to your point, right Selfie? Yeah, no, we weren't doing that, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the only photo you pie took is a command photo, yep, or like a group photo with our unit and now it was like a very basic, like we're standing in front of the Hilo, we're standing in front of the commander, so I'm just taking a photo. Yeah like you fast forward now, like they're taking selfies in the Hummer. You know they're. Video video down the field.
Speaker 1:You know they're recording like editing, editing right on the right on their phone, right on the phone, you know and I'm imagine like Sergeant Major, like what?
Speaker 2:you taking pictures of this stuff, like what are you?
Speaker 1:so. So you know. But, dennis, think about this for a second. So every generation that has come before us, right? So, like, when you think about, like the folks that were in World War one, coming into World War two, the, you know, the roaring 20s, the Great Depression, you know, coming into the 40s, every generation has had some kind of critique about the new generation.
Speaker 1:It's always been like that, right, we have our own, you know, perspective on things and but, but I always tell folks like the natural order. I always Throw that in there. You cannot run away from the natural order of things. It's just the way it is. Man, like you get married, chances are you gonna have a kid? That's just like the natural order of things. Maybe you don't, maybe you get married at an older you know, I'm just saying like the natural order of things. You drive your car. You probably have to put gas in it or charge it. That's just the natural order. Like, these are the things that that happen, right?
Speaker 1:So when I, when I think about like generations, the natural order is that you're gonna have to move out of the way as a leader. Yeah, that is the natural order. So, like you, you're it's hard to do right. You have to have enough Trust in yourself that you've done the best job you could possibly do. You've mentored, you've trained, you've Led by example. Right, you've done all these things because ultimately, you have to move out of the way For this next generation. So when folks you know, like I don't like the word, like snowflake and that kind of thing, I just think is the meaning, like whatever Call it, what you want, the natural order is that these folks, they're gonna have to step up to the plate at some point. Hopefully we don't see a world war three or anything remotely close to that. However, it's this next generation that's gonna have to answer the call. That's the natural order of things. It's just.
Speaker 2:It's just the way it is now, definitely, and I tell you what there's only one Generation that can complain and not get any negative feedback. That's the world too, guys. They're allowed to complain about anything. Yep, those are only guys. That's it, everyone else. We got to put some pushback.
Speaker 1:There's um. There's a gentleman who lives in my town. He served in World War two. I'm trying to get in contact with him. He's, he's, he's older. I would like to see if he would be interested in doing the podcast.
Speaker 2:Definitely, you know.
Speaker 1:I just have so many questions.
Speaker 2:I don't care. Anybody says that's the greatest generation.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely yeah we, um, I remember two, maybe two or three years ago we went to the. There was a Veterans Day parade, like in the Brunswick area, and we met some World War two guys and we're talking to the guy, he was all too old, a gentleman and we went back to Lions, not lions, the, the Elks. So we went to the Elks and he was telling the story. He goes, yeah, you know he goes. Yeah, I was at the Battle of the Bulge and you know I was at D-Day. You know I didn't really do anything you guys didn't do. I was like, sir, stop it. Okay, you were at D-Day. And the Battle of the Bulge and For people who don't know, d-day and the Battle of the Bulge were probably the two most impactful slash momentum War yeah, battles in war turning turning points turning points. Turning point like if we didn't win those.
Speaker 2:It was over and he was at both of them and survived in the air core. So wow, but he was just so humble about it. He goes yeah, you know, I just yeah, like he just went to AIT and that's it. Like no, sir you yeah you are him. You were that guy okay, sure and Fast forward.
Speaker 2:Now we're taking selfies in the Hilo, you know. So I to your point. I think it's that's where the disconnect is, but you're you're right to a point. We have to move over and we have to trust that, yes, we're training our replacements. So it would be who of you to make sure you do the right trainings.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm make sure you make them the leader that you want to be, you know so when I was at the, the senior non-commissioned officer Academy, which is a Maxwell Maxwell Air Force Base down in Alabama, one of the things that we did In the class was that they had us watch Three different, three or four different recruitment videos. So we watched an American recruitment video, we watched a Chinese recruitment video, a Russian Recruitment video and I believe it was North Korean Recruitment video. Brother, like you're watching these videos you know they're on YouTube, you can watch them. The snippet that we watched for the US recruitment video, compared to the other countries, night and day.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm sure night and day straight propaganda.
Speaker 1:Yeah, night and day, like like these guys, their videos are like we're coming for you, yeah, like we're coming and we're coming strong. Like there ain't no I Don't want to use a curse word or anything but like there ain't no bitch in our body, like like we're coming. And then the, the, the American one, was, you know, cartoonish. You know two mothers. This girl wants to go off and you know she's writing poetry in her room and she's an adventure and and it's all cartoon right. And then you have like missiles, you know, like from these other countries, like no, like when we're for real.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's not a thing too. If, for our list, for the listeners who may not have been outside the continent of the United States, there's a reason people think Americans are the way we are, because we kind of Romanticize like America, right, it's like beef and cowboys, essentially right. So you know, we get to go on trips, we're doing all this fun stuff. We promise to do what we want within reason, without breaking the law. We can even talk bad about our own government and nothing really happens, right.
Speaker 2:But you go some of these other countries Like, especially like Saudi Arabia, you can't even, like, say anything negative, like anything negative. You have to carry yourself a certain way. There's a lot more strict. You know the Authoritarian type, you know dictatorship type, leadership, you know, and we forget in America and don't me wrong, america is not great by any means, but we're not perfect.
Speaker 2:But also, I Can't think of another first world country I would want to live in that has the same rights, you know, and yes, it's not perfect, but we're at least allowed to argue and debate for our rights and not just be held under a thumb. You know, and those other countries they use that it's, I would even say some of these other countries like China and North Korea, they're a little bit jealous of us Because they don't want their people acting like how we act.
Speaker 3:You know, as far as like having free thought, you know thinking for ourselves, you know.
Speaker 2:Not to question stuff. Just follow orders, do what we say, and then you know, don't worry about the other stuff.
Speaker 1:So even even like in like with like China in regards to like, like, tick-tock. Even the algorithm that we see in the US, the algorithm that we see in the US, is completely different from their algorithm. There, our, our kids, our gen.
Speaker 1:You know this young generation. They're just being fed, like you know. They're just being fed. What would be the right word? Just, I don't know non-educated. I don't know non-educational garbage right. Where in China like everything's like instructional and you know there's a lot has to do with like profession and you know Just enlightened content where our stuff is just right.
Speaker 2:You know Different and that's part of it too. Right, america is part of freedom. That the keyword freedom, the freedom of choice to do what you want. But Sometimes that freedom comes with a negative Backend portion of it. Yes, you can choose to do whatever you want to do. That can also include you doing nothing. Doing nothing is also a choice. So if you're just okay with doing nothing, the competition was okay with that, because that's one less person to take a spot from them. So you know, certain people benefit from us, us ingesting certain you know things, certain media. They want to think a certain way. So I'm a tired person. I to double check and triple check what I'm researching, what I'm looking to, if I, if I hear something, I to kind of fact check, because I'm just so used to just Hearing nonsense.
Speaker 2:I just want to make sure and I tell you what. You don't necessarily even have to agree with everything you hear. Just because you don't like what you're hearing doesn't mean it's not true. And I think we need to realize that even in our own lives, right Like we can hear something, I don't believe that and it's like man, that's kind of true, you know so, even even like what it was aliens now. It was oh my god, it was aliens. Sorry, I've been knowing about that. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Y'all just figuring out now, like they've been slowly like Kind of feed us, like hey, how'd you feel this happened, you know, even with movies, right. Like we have all these things coming out of the media, but also it's weird because no one cares of this.
Speaker 1:aliens- so it's like but aliens are real, right, right, they are they really. I believe the real, I think they're real at the universe is too big. It's too big for us to be just us too big, too big, you know, but they have you on, like you've been out on patrol, like on ships and that kind of thing you? Have you ever seen anything?
Speaker 2:in the sky it's gonna sound crazy. Man, you know, every time I tell a story was like yo you're full of it. But I tell you I I remember it specifically Okay.
Speaker 1:Oh shit, spark is right premier right so and actually, One of my friends.
Speaker 2:He commented on the clip. Like I served with Dennis, it was actually him who was with me and he can confirm this. So me and him were both on watch and so we're on the flight line, okay, so normally on the flight lines nighttime You're just seeing helicopters and planes going by, so you don't think anything of it.
Speaker 1:So this is like an aircraft carrier, yeah, yeah, not, not like a destroyer. We're doing watch and I got questions.
Speaker 2:No, no, norris, and we're doing watch. And then so he sees this light and we're thinking, oh, one of the Helos is coming back, because it's just hovering like one of the Helos coming back, but we didn't hear anything. We're just, we see the lights of the tail, lights of the Helo, just like there. So we're like, oh, was the Helo landing? And we didn't hear anything, like any Helos are landing.
Speaker 1:So and that's a distinctive sound right.
Speaker 2:You can tell for you right, Like you you know right, you can tell when a helicopter is approaching, like even even now exactly right the helicopter approaching. I'm lying, we're on the carrier, we're on base, but we're just on the flight line on base. We're doing, we're doing gate watch.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, we're doing gate watch and we saw the lights for the Helo and Cano my friend Kano he was like you know, that's weird, how come the Helos not landing? I was like, yes, I don't know. So the Helo was just there and then it just it went maybe like 75 meters to the left and we were like Yo, why is this not making any sound? Like what, like this is? I was like you're seeing this right, like the Helos not making any Sounds there, and then it just like zipped away and just went fast. But it didn't go fast like a helicopter, we're fast like a jet. So basically it was and we don't have in the marine there's. So the Marines have Harry forgot what aircraft they have the, the Harriet the one that like hovers.
Speaker 2:But even that was the case, there was no sound. So we were just so freaked out because it was hovering like a helicopter, but it flew in the opposite direction like it was a jet and and to this day no one believes us what we saw was like and I kind of wish we had phones back to the cameras to record. But it was just something.
Speaker 2:and now, looking back I was like maybe it wasn't an alien, maybe it was just Aircraft they were testing, but it was just so weird because there was no sound. I Don't know if you ever saw like a Helo at night.
Speaker 2:You can tell an aircraft landing because you can tell by the lights, like the tail lights and everything and it just threw us off because there was no sound, it was just quiet, and it just flew off very fast and to this day we have no idea and that was freaking me out and I was like yo, that has to be something, because where were you stationed when you saw them? St Eagle, the Navy Seal base so this was in San Diego.
Speaker 1:Right, we're here, we're here.
Speaker 2:This is probably like 2003, maybe 2004 2005 at nighttime and also it was like zero two. So, yeah, we could have been tired, but my whole thing was there was no sound. That's what really threw me off. Like the lights didn't throw me off this, the velocity of how fast it went really and throw me off, it was just there was no sound.
Speaker 2:As for a helicopter to be that close and have no sound, even the stealth helicopters which we have, they make a sound like you'll hear, you'll feel the, the rotor wash, you'll feel the wind, like it was just weird to me. So I can never explain that and everyone thinks I'm crazy when I say that. But Um, the friend came out, the one who come down the post, he was with me, he'll confirm he's like we never figured out today's to this day what that was and we always thought like that was just weird to us. So I hardly believe in that. But also I believe that there's certain things that happen that we can't explain. Like I'm sure, looking back, maybe it was like a test or something. I don't think drones are really big back in 2003.
Speaker 2:But even now like we see something. It could be a drone, it could be suffer a movie, but I believe it is.
Speaker 1:there's no way, there's no, yeah, I think I think whatever extra, extra terrestrial aliens, whatever I think they, just they've been around for a while, I Don't know.
Speaker 2:I just scouting us. That's all. I don't know man Like it's.
Speaker 1:It's pretty interesting, dude, it's pretty. I've never had like an experience with anything like at night. Or I Tell you, where I thought I would see stuff but I really didn't was when I was like stationed in in Iraq. When I was in Iraq in 03, I Would think like, oh man, like you know, because the the night sky just looks so different you know what I mean Because there's, like you know, you're in the middle of this base, is in the middle of somewhere, and there's like very little ambient light, so you can see. You know what I mean Something really wild that I saw in Iraq.
Speaker 1:That I, to this day, I I saw like a um, it must have been like a five or ten minute like Lightning storm. I don't ever, ever seen anything like that. Just the craziest thing, just like off in the distance, there's just this Rapid lightning just going off and it's just like the way it's like lighting up the sky. It's like in the middle of the night. You know what I mean. You're just kind of like watching it, like man, like what is that? You know I was. I was asking my buddy like you ever seen anything like that. He's like, yeah, no, there's like a lightning storm.
Speaker 2:Yeah, man, there's always stuff that happens to us to be just kind of explain, and you know it's just interesting. I Was saying the coolest stuff happens when, like no one's around, unfortunately like all the cool stuff you said never saw.
Speaker 2:Yeah so, but yeah, man, there's just so many secrets we have. I'm like I said I'm sure I was tell my, I was tell my, my civilian friends. I was like, even with the military right, there's so many things that we came and talk about that we experienced. If you knew what we were really doing or what we stopped From happening or prevented you would lose your mind.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm like how close to home it was and Every day, like, even even with our own FBI or Intel NSA, they're probably stopped so many attacks that we have no idea about and we're just like living our regular lives. Yeah, everybody's in their bubble Like we were this close to like it all being over, and we'll never know.
Speaker 2:Just because it is such a good job you know, I believe there's an explanation for everything, but I also believe that I Science can prove something true until it's not. You know, at one point everyone thought the world was flat, until they realized it wasn't so it's not flat right, Okay.
Speaker 2:So my knowledge, not the, to my knowledge not but, um, but yeah, I think some people just they want an explanation for things and if they can't explain it, it terrifies them, like I personally think there's a reason if we'll say if aliens are here or have been here, there's a reason. They haven't, like, interacted with us. Maybe they think that these guys are so primitive. We'll come back another 200 years. Mm-hmm. They can't even get along with each other.
Speaker 2:Let's come back in 200 years, or you know, let's, let's leave some little things here and there and see if they pick up on it or try to like reverse engineer. But I'd be ignorant to think that we don't have some tabs on something. We're just trying to wait. Or maybe they made contact already and we're just dealing with them. We have no idea. They could be just here dealing with us and we don't even know, like we never know, you know. So I'm not getting paranoid, but no man, it's gonna.
Speaker 1:It's gotta be Interesting if that ever cuz. Little by little, more things are coming out within the government. They're releasing more and more things. But what if? What if we wake up one thing? They're like hey man, like I Don't even know what you would call them like these ETs came down and we're gonna Work on something to get I don't know like.
Speaker 2:I mean, I like your positive on that, but I Be more concerned that humans wouldn't be able to accept Something more different. Right, like Some, humans can't accept a skin color, let alone if you're green you know so that that would, and then I also think and this is me just be going on a rabbit hole but what if that would trigger by? You know what? These guys are not good people, let's Right.
Speaker 2:So I think myself like that, so, but I hope it's the latter, I hope it's they want to come and help in. You know, not exploit. Yeah, I was thinking about stuff like that, like we can't even get along with each other at the time. I'm gonna get along with like People from another planet that don't speak our language and look like us, you know, yeah that would be.
Speaker 1:But but what if they did look like us Dalby?
Speaker 3:I don't know like right, like we're assuming that they don't look like us, right, but what?
Speaker 1:if right, I don't know like what if they've just been here and what if what? What if we're like all descendants of some, like alien planet? We just haven't been, we haven't been activated yet that's believable, it's possible. Maybe there's like something that we got to go through and they can activate us. Yeah, I Don't know.
Speaker 2:Anything's possible, like if you. If you would have told me you'd be able to order anything on a computer and have it sent to your house, like 15 years ago, I would have called you a liar. Yeah, oh, there's no way. I can just order anything I want on the computer or come to my house in a couple days and Now fast, for we have aliens in. No one's really shocked by it which is interesting to me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no one's really shocked by the no one's geeking out about it. We're like okay.
Speaker 3:Don't worry about the student loans I got to lose man, we're all aliens.
Speaker 1:Then it's the student loan is the only one that you can't forgive. Yeah, why is that?
Speaker 2:listen, uncle Sammy, their cut man. They need to cut Dude. That's crazy.
Speaker 1:You could go bankrupt on any other loan. Yeah, that your student loan. Uncle Sammy they're gonna go to the grave and get me. Yeah, yeah, man.
Speaker 2:And I tell you what I my dad, told me this when I was young. I never believed him. He was like the older you get, the more conservative you get. I was like I don't believe you. Now, anytime something happens, I'm like damn man. I can see why people do like tax fraud.
Speaker 1:Yeah. I don't condone it, but it's like we're spending so much money on other stuff and you're still taxing us Like or like not so much even the fraud, but like figuring out the loopholes right, Because that's another thing Like like, if you understand, like tax loopholes and this kind of listen.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna tell you how taxes work in a nutshell for listeners. This is how taxes work. Okay, so the government is like you owe us money and we're like how much? The government is like we're not going to tell you. You got to figure it out yourself, right. And then we're like, okay, well, what if we get the wrong amount? Then you go to jail. That's basically how it works. Pay us a month. This is how much you know. Figure out how much you owe. If it's not the correct amount, we're going to either tax you more or you go to jail. Then that's show. And we're not telling you how we're spending the money. Maybe, maybe. So I think I read this thing and I think that's why you see a lot of people now getting more financially literate. My parents are immigrants. Like they, financial literacy wasn't like a big thing, it was more like survival, and now that I'm older, I think that's for like a lot of right.
Speaker 2:It's for a lot of us, for most of us, you know, and I think now that I'm older I'm like damn. I even think about how much money I blew in the military Just like buying dumb stuff. You know, not nothing to show for it. And now you're seeing all these financial, literary stuff was saying, well, hey, well, you can manage your money. I'm sorry, you can manage your money this way. You can do XYZ. I found out that if you get $70,000 in stock profit, you're taxed at a lesser rate than if you made $70,000 at your day job. So we'll say like, if you make 70 K at your day job it'll tax you 20%, but if you made 70 K in the stocks in one year, you only get taxed like 10%.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, so so it's like wow, I was like wait a minute.
Speaker 1:So it's like and that's what I'm getting at, like learning, learning the loop holes, dude, like there's just so much. I think, for the most part, like there should be curriculum in school for this.
Speaker 2:And I can do that Because you know why. Because they teach us how to be workers. Why would they teach us financial literacy? They teach us how to think about. Everything we learn in school is teaching us how to be a worker.
Speaker 2:Come on time. You're in school from nine to three. You get a little 30 minute lunch break. Do all these assignments. If you don't do assignments the right way, something bad is going to happen to you. Something bad is going to happen. Either you fail or you don't go to the next grade. They're not going to teach you how to balance a checkbook. They're not going to teach you you know how to get into stocks, you know. They're not going to teach you all these other things. It literally teaches you how to be a worker. The only real reason you, or the only real way you'll learn about finances if you go to college and go to the business school or learn finance, which is extra. So the business school degree costs more than the labor studies degree or the you know liberal arts degree, but with the business degree finance you're going to recoup that money because, yeah, you paid 80K for your degree but more than likely you're going to get a job in finance or some kind of money field that is worth 80K or more.
Speaker 2:So the return on investment is a lot better. Speaking from someone who works at a college right, that's what it is you can make the degrees that make the most money cost more, but you can still pay $80,000 in college and get a liberal arts degree and not make the same as an engineer, and you guys are paying for the same thing. So it's literally to teach you how to be a worker, you know. That's why a lot of these entrepreneurs and things like that, they're not really like college people. No, don't be wrong, I'm a big component of college. I believe education is key. You learn, but now, especially with the economy and student loans and everything, you're seeing a lot more people kind of shy away from education because they feel like there's no value in it for them.
Speaker 2:But there is value in education. But even with colleges it's a business. Oh yeah, 100% College is a business.
Speaker 1:I think one of the things that folks I don't know that everyone sees it this way, but one of the things that I see, or the positive aspects of college that I see, is the network part of it Exactly right.
Speaker 1:Right, you graduate high school. If you don't go to college or community school, let's just say you want to go directly into, like, working, or there's a part of you building on your network where you miss out on. You know what I mean. Right, let's say you get like a decent job I don't know out of high school. Maybe you work for your mom or dad or whatever the case is. There's a part of your network that there's a potential to add on to your network that's not happening, where?
Speaker 1:I think that when you go off to school, of course you know there's all these other aspects to it, right, like the educational, the academic, academia, but the network part of it, when you're interacting with all these other, because you don't know what folks are going to go on to do next, right, so I think also with the military. I think that's also a benefit as well, that you're kind of like you're building on to your network of what's already been established. What do you have so far? I think, once you leave, for the most part you leave after four years, or maybe you go to undergrad or whatever the case is, but you leave and don't get me wrong, maybe you have folks that are not interested in networking or their introvert or whatever the case is, but there is a large majority of folks that are leaving school with a huge network especially with like social media, right, they have all these folks and now there's this they're staying in touch and they're figuring out who's going off where and who's working where and who's going to law school, whatever.
Speaker 1:There's a whole network that you build up, build upon. I think that sometimes folks kind of like miss that.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, definitely, and I think there's college isn't the end all be all for education. You can, you can learn a trade you know, you can HVAC, all these you know hard skills. That were big maybe 20 years ago and it was like a small window from like maybe like a 90s, like early 2000s where, like, people didn't care about like trade right.
Speaker 2:Like well you're a plumber who cares, you know, go to school. But now the playing field is a little bit different now because even with education right, it has a cap. Because I remember at one point when I was younger, a bachelor's was the thing to have and, like you, maybe get a master's. Now, at this point, pretty much everyone has a master's degree. So if everyone has a master's degree, a bachelor's degree is like the new associate's degree is like okay, well, if a bachelor's big, everyone has a bachelor's at this point, you know everyone has a bachelor's at this point.
Speaker 2:So now to compete, you have to either get like a master's degree and or like a doctor or something like that, which is more money, right, because the doctorates and master's degrees aren't cheap. They're probably like 20k and a 30k easily on top of the 40k you probably have from undergrad just to get a 10k pay raise at your job or a new position. So the return on investment depending on who you are, can either. I think what's happening is I think people are realizing like well, I don't necessarily have to do all this schooling and education to either make money or live a good life. You can learn a trade, you can podcast media.
Speaker 2:There's so many different venting, youtube right, youtube is popping now, so you can have all these avenues to make income, which necessarily is not how to deal with education, but there is a still niche for that. Like, we do need education, we do need to learn things, we do need to be educated, because I personally believe the more educated the society is, the better all will be overall. So I just wish there was a way for more people to afford college aside from the military. The military is a great tool to go to college. I'd even say more people are joining the military now just to go to college than ever before, especially in the National Guard. Right, you have the Guard waiver that pay your tuition. Before it was just, you know, unencouraged commitment. I love my country and I was like damn my parents can afford to send me to school.
Speaker 1:Air Force at that point, you know, yeah, that's how I got all my schooling done was while I was in, which was great. I mean, I didn't have the whole experience of like living at the university and that kind of thing, but I had something super duper close to it, you know, which is that you know I'm living overseas, traveling around and I go to school at night with other military folks. I wouldn't change it for anything.
Speaker 2:No, you still got the experience. But and I sound like a screws, but essentially college is supposed to be about getting whatever specific education or certificate you need to get a good job. Like that was the whole premise of college in the first place. Like.
Speaker 2:I had to do this program, go to school, and then I completed it and then now I can get a good job, support my family and or who else right? But now it looks like going to school just shows that you're a good worker, right. Shows that you can show up someplace for four years, complete these tasks and then continue on.
Speaker 1:I think also two men with that. I think we instinctively think that because someone went away to school or completed school or even has like a doctorate degree, you you equate that with the person being intelligent which is not the case.
Speaker 2:It's not the case. It's not the case.
Speaker 1:Dude, I can't tell you how many people I've met in the military, outside the military, with all this education, but they're just not. They're on a different like frequency, frequency almost. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:They say. They say there's a I forgot the exact term, but there's. There's different variables for what, where that is. You have book smarts. You have street smarts. Okay, coming from the inner city, coming from a city environment, you're probably more street smart than you are a book smart, as opposed to, maybe, someone who grew up in the suburbs. Not saying people in the suburbs can't be street smart, but you know, growing up in an environment where survival and growing up in an environment where you have a choice of doing a multiple of things, you don't have that same fire you know that same passion under you.
Speaker 2:So I believe street smarts and book smarts is completely different. There's a lot of people who are book smart that have no common sense and they say common sense is common. It's not that common. And I think that I think there's some correlation between people who are book smart and them following the rules to a T, where life doesn't really affect them, right. So I'll give you an example. So we'll say you have someone who's very analytical. They're like okay, one plus one is two, that's it Okay. Or you know, point A to point C, that's it.
Speaker 2:They think very linear, but life happens, right. So it's like I want to go to school. This is me getting a good job, is me going to school? Oh, I had a kid, okay, now I got to stop. Oh wait, I got laid off. Oh wait, my mom got sick. Oh wait, my sister or brother having legal issues. So all these life experiences happening to us, you know kind of all what next that stop us from competing our tasks. But for some people they've had a linear path their whole life. So they're like whoa, how can? We can go to school, I was able to go to school.
Speaker 2:Well guess what, bro? I grew up in Brooklyn and to a single mom who didn't have that.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That resource to send me to school.
Speaker 1:So yeah, we didn't have that.
Speaker 2:We didn't have that Right. So, guess what? I had a joint in military, play a sport or, unfortunately, sell drugs or something nefarious to support my family, as opposed to you, who both your parents, you know, were in the center in your life. They had both stable jobs they have, you know. You had a house. You had resources in the community to pay for college or get loans that you'd be able to pay back. So they're looking at it like, well, I was able to do this. How come you couldn't do it? But they didn't experience the life that you had or the trials you had to go through, the tribulation that you had to go through to get to where you're at. I always think it's funny when people tell us that, oh, you're able to go to school because of military, you're lucky. But I wouldn't call it luck, I didn't want like a lottery, and say, hey, you know I had to earn that. You know some of us had to almost die to go to college, you know.
Speaker 2:So I wouldn't call that luck, but they see it as lucky because we don't have to pay for school necessarily, but we paid in other ways, right?
Speaker 1:You don't know how many times I had to correct people for that exact statement, exact statement, like oh, you get no, no, no, I don't get anything, right.
Speaker 2:I earned this Right.
Speaker 1:And here's why, Like, yeah, I've many times I've had to like really, you know, get people to yeah, yeah, people think.
Speaker 2:And it's almost triggering, right, because I don't want to say it's triggering because it's, I don't they just don't know. And when people say ignorant, ignorant is like a negative term, but ignorant just means not knowing, right, they're just ignorant to the fact that what we had to go through for the government to pay for our school. So sometimes you have to have that compassion to kind of forgive them. So, to your point, I kind of correct them hey, I wasn't lucky, I didn't win a lottery. Say, hey, just 36 months ago to school, I had to earn this blood, sweat, tears, broken bones, almost dying to go to school. That's not luck. And that's why I said some people live a different life and they're just confused that, oh, how can we, couldn't do XYZ, you know? Like they don't get it, like they never had to experience that. It's kind of like a, it's like a foreign concept to them, like, oh wait, what do you? What do you mean? Uh, you have to worry about the lights being cut off. I don't understand.
Speaker 2:Like oh, some people have to live their life. Well, what do you mean? You couldn't have dinner. Sometimes that happens.
Speaker 1:That happens, that happens.
Speaker 2:You know so and they never experienced that. So it's kind of like a like a foreign concept to them that they never had to experience the same way. Like we'll never know what women go through with their period and their cramps. We'll never know. The only thing I know is it sucks for you and it makes you irritable, but I can't tell you, oh, it's not that bad, because I've never experienced that. Like I've had a cramp in my leg like a Charlie horse, but I for me to tell you, oh, like your stomach cramps or whatever, that's disingenuous because I've never experienced that. So I would come from a place of ignorance just telling you to just get over it or just lay down, right, so that's the same concept. Like they don't see the blood, sweat, tears, the time away from our family you know the friends we've lost dealing with that right. Like they don't think about that. They think about like, oh, you just got to go to school and I have to pay for it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's such a like a simplistic way of looking at it Right, Like yeah oh, Uncle Sam got you covered. Like well, no, hang on a second Like no Right. What made you join the Navy?
Speaker 2:So my, my situation was a little bit unique so. So originally I was supposed to go to the Pell Pennsylvania culinary and cooking school. So when I was a senior in high school, the home news I don't know if you guys remember the home news, that's a long time ago, so the home news it was like a New Jersey paper, it's kind of a star ledger. Okay, okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so there was like a cooking contest in Middlesex County College so they were looking for high school students to make a dish from scratch and present it, you know, in the contest. So there was maybe like 20 of us and I placed like number. I think I was number two. I definitely didn't win, I was like number two. So I placed number two at the whole contest and I made lasagna from scratch. My mom taught me how to make lasagna. I made it from scratch.
Speaker 2:You made the noodles and everything I mean well, no, I mean, I mean not from scratch. Like I, as a 17 year old kid, I made it myself.
Speaker 1:Like I didn't buy it. Yeah, I prepared it. I thought you meant like, you meant like the noodles. Oh, I wish, I wish I was that good. No, like the flour and the no, yeah, I bought the noodles, I bought the sauce, but I made the recipe, got it.
Speaker 2:I made it from scratch as far as, like, I prepared it myself, I cut it up and everything Nice. And I won second place and the Pennsylvania culinary cooking school just happened to be there Like hey, want to offer you a scholarship. We love what you did. I was in the home news, I took a picture and everything. About two weeks later I I was involved in an incident where I was somewhere I wasn't supposed to be and I got arrested and they found they found drugs on me, basically, so they weren't mine. I got in trouble and luckily my father was in law enforcement.
Speaker 1:Hold on, hold on. Where, where, where were you like? Walking, driving, I was driving, I was driving, you're driving, you're driving.
Speaker 2:I pulled over by the police.
Speaker 1:You by yourself.
Speaker 2:I was. So I was with friends of friends in my car Like I knew them, but I didn't know them Like we were going somewhere.
Speaker 1:Associates, associates, you're giving somebody a ride, right, right.
Speaker 2:Associates and I knew one of the guys, but he knew the other guys.
Speaker 1:Got it.
Speaker 2:I was like I'm gonna associate they weren't like my close friends or anything Got it so.
Speaker 1:So there's people in your car, Right.
Speaker 2:There's people in my car.
Speaker 1:You get pulled over, they get pulled over.
Speaker 2:Everyone in my car just runs out. Whoa, they book it. They're out of here.
Speaker 2:Whoa, yeah, they just jet Um. And then I so at that point, look, I'm screwed, yeah Cause at that point my head was like yo, they ran out for a reason. So, uh, when the cops searched me, they found, uh, some drugs in my car and I was like I'm done so what kind of drugs did they find? Uh, they found weed in my car. Yeah, they found weed in my car, and they also found um some ammunition in my car. Okay, no gun Just like ammunition. Got it so at that point we.
Speaker 1:I was going to tell you, I was like, reflecting back on it now, before you mentioned the ammunition yeah, but I was like, and like we, yeah, people don't understand some 20 years ago your life was over.
Speaker 2:That's it Over For the, for the smallest amount, yeah.
Speaker 1:Like now you can go and buy whatever you want to buy at the dispensary, and this no dude. Like 20 years ago we were screwed Right.
Speaker 2:Literally screwed.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so it was over for me. So, luckily, my father's in law enforcement. Um, I was an athlete at the time in high school. I got good grades. So, um, luckily, my counselor, I remember, I remember saying Dr Clifford, he, uh, he actually went to my court case. He spoke for me as, like yo it's kid, great school, never been in trouble before. I've never been in trouble to that point, never been in trouble. And they were like he was literally like yo, wrong place, wrong time.
Speaker 2:So between that and my father vouching for me because he was in law enforcement, uh, the judge gave me PTI, which is called pre-challenged invention. So basically, if you've never been in trouble before, they give you like PTI. And he said if the judge said, if you can find a branch of the military to take you, you can use that in lieu of your service for time served, because they're going to send me to jail anyway, because by the time my court date happened I would have been 18. They're looking to send me to jail at that point. So I, um, so I went to the recruiting office on route 18 right there in East Brunswick.
Speaker 2:I went to the Air Force. They said absolutely not the army, absolutely not. Coast Guard, absolutely not. Uh, my last Marines? Absolutely not. So everyone was just like I was radioactive, they didn't want to touch me, they didn't want anything to do with me because I had a pending case and this was prior to 9 11 because, um. So they were just like nah, you got to have like a clean record. So I went to a Navy office and my eyes were like watering. I'll never forget it was pretty officer Jimenez. Poor. We can do with you.
Speaker 2:I was like yo, if you do not take me, I'm going to jail, straight up. Like I'm going to jail, do not pass, go, do not collect $200. Like it's over for me. So he looked at me. He was like I got you, bro, Sounded a waiver, got me in the Navy. I was like, thank God. So that that's how, originally how I ended up getting to Navy and then at the time that's almost unheard of, though.
Speaker 1:It's almost unheard of because, so the fact that you were able to get into the Navy with a waiver dude like that's and coming from a recruiter, that's like yeah, yeah, right.
Speaker 2:So, um yeah, they signed a waiver for me to get into Navy, so I got in and then I picked my rate, so I picked to be a rescue swimmer. So that's what I picked to be a rescue swimmer.
Speaker 1:Dennis real quick. So you, this was 99 that all of this is happening. Yes, it was like 2000, like 2000.
Speaker 2:Okay, so this was like early 2000s, it was like right before 9 11. So by time I finished all of my training and I finished Sears school. So Sears school is search, um damn, I had it last time. So search extraction rescue innovate okay. Um any, any person who's going to any kind of like aircraft, whether you're a pilot, whether you're aircrew yeah you have to go through that training. So basically get caught. You know what? To do what not to?
Speaker 2:do so. As soon as I finished Sears school not 11 happened sort of like uh guess what, bro, you want to Iraq at that point. So I went from dodging jail, wow, to go into like a war right, and I was stationed on the USS constellation, the Connie, and we were actually part of the first invasion to like bag that and everything like an 03. So that's when I actually got to um Iraq and 03. And I did that for a support for nine months and then I came back. So one of my pilots, uh, he had a trainee, uh, he had a training squadron in San Diego at the seal base and he was like, oh, come over to Coronado. I was like Roger, that sir, I'll be right there. And then I did in my last four years in the Navy, uh, at Coronado, being a instructor on the seal base.
Speaker 2:So it's it's it's interesting to see how, like your life can kind of change by like one simple mistake. And it's it's humbling, because I even tell people like I shouldn't be talking to you right now, like I should be in jail somewhere, like a repeat offender, because it only takes one time. And when I tell people my story they're like well, that was the first time you got in trouble, like I was like they don't care, they do not care. Yeah, exactly that was the first time I did they do not care. At that point I had my hand in the cookie jar. At that point, you know, and it's, it's really humbling because I think about you know everything I've been through, even with that. And then, at the time, right Also after that, I got into Navy. Um, my girlfriend got pregnant with my son.
Speaker 2:So I was like oh, I got him, I got to marry her, because that's the right thing to do, you know now.
Speaker 1:Now did you find out you were pregnant after you were in the like, before you left to the Navy, or how did that work? So basically I was in the late entry program when you found out right, when I found out right.
Speaker 2:So basically, everything happened within like it seems so long ago, but everything happened within like it feels like weeks, so it was probably like months with. So for the time that I got in trouble, so I got the waiver for the Navy, so I found out I was having my son. I was all within like six to seven months. It seems so quick.
Speaker 2:Everything was just like rapid, rapid, rapid you know, and then going from, and that's why I say like sometimes the pressure rates going from like okay, I dodged one bullet to like damn, I got to do this, to damn this is happening. So it was kind of like all this happening to me by age of 19,. Right, like I'm, I'm getting hit with all this life experience. That's why people think I'm older than where I really am, because I feel like I've lived.
Speaker 2:I lived like a 50 year old man's life within my 40 year lifespan. You know, as far as like what I had to do and I don't regret anything because it kind of shaped me to the man I am today and I try to think that I was giving an opportunity for redemption and I can't squander that opportunity. You know, because my family depends on me. You know I don't want to embarrass my parents. You know my mom, my dad, you know also my son to have someone to look up to, you know. So having kids really does change your perspective on life and how you see your life. You know I was joking say like when you have kids your life is over.
Speaker 2:I don't mean like your life is over like it's really over, I mean like your life is no longer yours. You know like someone else depends on you, not even your wife, like your kid depends on you. You know like your wife will be okay, but your daughter or your son, they need you. They need your guidance and your support. You know they depend on you for everything. They look to you like you're their hero. So you have to make sure that you set a good example for them.
Speaker 2:And that was a turning point for me where it's kind of like you know what? Like I got to take this a little bit more seriously. Like having my son, you know, getting in trouble. You know having a navigating the military scheme and everything you know. So everything it's very, it's a very humbling experience. But, like I said, I wouldn't change it for the world. You know, I have to think that stopped me from doing something really, really stupid. You know, Maybe maybe me getting in trouble at 17 was the reason that I'm here now, because if I didn't get in trouble then I just would have Did something way worse.
Speaker 1:Yeah, who knows what would have happened right.
Speaker 2:Like maybe maybe I would have caught up with that wrong crowd over something way more serious. And then now I'm really like in the ringer. So that's pretty much why this. So your Air Force. So how come you didn't join me? I?
Speaker 1:Don't think I would have made it in the Navy man. No, I'll tell you why I didn't join. I almost joined the Navy, almost. So that's actually a good question. That is why I didn't join the Navy. So, growing up in Brooklyn, I'm chasing tail and and this is girl that I'm like behind all the time wherever she goes, I'm trying to be there. So she tells me that that to come with her, that her Recruiter because she was joining the Navy, that her recruiter was Gonna take it wasn't like a, like a tour. I just think that he had access to a van. It was a Navy recruit is like, screw it, we're gonna go down to Virginia, we're gonna go to Norfolk and show you guys, no, so sure, it is like a early day like I'm talking about. We leave Brooklyn, probably like Five or six in the morning, by 9 am we're down at like Norfolk, down there, and we get a tour of what II Don't know if it was a battleship or because now, like I'm learning the difference between. It wasn't a carrier, we didn't have a flight line, but it was huge. It's. In my opinion, it was huge, like a huge ship. So we're getting toured around.
Speaker 1:Obviously I'm not listening to what the recruiters and those guys are saying. I'm just like following around this girl and I do remember them showing us like the barracks, kind of like, where you sleep right. Fast forward to like a month later, same girl. She's like hey, the Air Force guy is gonna take us on a tour of the Air Force base. So again, I'm kind of easy. He said. He said invite your friends. So like, again I'm following behind her. There's always a girl involved.
Speaker 1:Of course you know what you doing life, there's always a female, you know there's always a woman. So, or love interest, right, like where was a movie? So I Now I'm following behind this girl. So now we go to the Air Force base, we get a tour of the whole base and now we're touring the dormitory. So when we open the door, you know, I see the room. I'm like I'm like hey, like who do you share this with? Like where where's the bunk bed? He's like oh no, no, there's no bunk bed. This is a this, this is for you. I was like so what do you say? Like oh, you share, there's like a suite. So you share, like a, this particular room. There's like a little kitchenette area with like a little table, refrigerator, and you share that with the guy next to you, like dude, like okay, so mind you, at no point was I gonna join the military at this particular time. Just being exposed to these two different things, it just shows you what resonates with you.
Speaker 1:So I'm working for a maintenance company in Midtown Manhattan where I would Strip and wax floors with, like like a machine, you know. So I would work 11 at night to seven in the morning. So vacuum in, wiping down windows and all those kind of things, stripping and waxing floors by myself. Then in the morning the same building had like a gym in the basement. It was like a sub level, it's like a huge gym. So I was a lifeguard. So I go down After my shift is over, so I go downstairs, I take the elevator down and now I'm checking in at the front desk. You got a picture it man. It's like uh, do you know who Rosie Perez is?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah so picture like a young Rosie Perez is not her, but but it was like just the accent. So it's a Puerto Rican girl with the accent, the big earrings, she's chewing gum, she's making bubbles, super root right, like you know. So I go down there to check in for my shift. She's basically like she's chewing the gum, popping the bubbles, she's clicking, clicking, clicking. She's like you're not on it and she has, like her nails are all done, typical Puerto Rican girl from the Bronx probably, or Brooklyn, who knows. And she's basically like you're not on the schedule, kick rocks. So man, like I knew I was on the schedule, I'm like I screw it. I'm not on the schedule. They made a mistake. I'll just, I'll just head home early. Right at the time I was living in Brooklyn. So I go out, I get a, I get a coffee and I get a. Do you remember what a corn muffin?
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, for those listening, a corn muffin is exactly that as a corn muffin. They heat it up on a hot grill, they put some butter and jelly on it with your coffee and go. So I'm in. I'm in Times Square, I go down to catch the train. Now it's a little later, it's probably closer to like nine.
Speaker 1:I've run into this girl that I used to go to night school with on the train platform so I start chatting with her. I'm like hey, like, like, where have you been? Like I haven't seen you. She's out of an extensive conversation of roughly like 30 minutes or so. You know we're waiting for the train. I let a few trains go by, you know, because the country we're having this conversation. All I got from the conversation was that she was in the Air Force, she was doing public affairs for the Air Force, she was living in Japan Doing public affairs and that she was going to school for free. Those were like the main things that I heard, right. I didn't understand what public affairs meant. I didn't understand the whole Air Force thing, the whole Japan. I live in Japan. That was mind blown, right. I was like who lives in Japan? So she digs in her purse and she pulls out this card, it's like all bent up. She's like, hey, like this is the recruiter's info, you should go talk to him. So I look at it. I'm like, okay, like I'm just gonna go here now.
Speaker 1:So I just went straight to Flatbush, out to Brooklyn. I go and Flatbush Avenue there's a bunch of storefronts and like so, like the Navy had one, the Army, the Marines, right, so the only one that was open at this time in the morning was the Army. So I go walking down the street. There's a guy in an Army uniform. He's leaning on like a Honda Accord with, like these 18 inch chrome rims. That is the top part of his uniform. He doesn't have it on. He's leaning on it. He's smoking a new port. So he sees me walking down. He's like, what's up, baby, what's up, ready to do this, ready to do this? I'm like looking at him, like what? Like now, man, I'm looking, looking for the Air Force. So the gate is down, so like the storefront for the Air Force is down. He's like, oh they, they're closed, they close, baby, they're not coming back. I'm like Like something's not adding up. So I go back to the corner. I sit in this restaurant, I get some food. I go back like an hour later. I go back now the Air Force gate is up so I go in there.
Speaker 1:Air Force guy, remember, is in 99. They didn't make gold that year. So he looks super flustered, right. He's like so I walk in and he's basically like, do you have an appointment? Like like, who are you? And I'm like, oh, like I've so and so you know, gave me this card. He doesn't know who, who I'm talking about. So he's like um, he's basically ready to like tell me what's going on. He's basically ready, like tell me to get out the office. He's like uh, you know what he's like, sit down and he goes in and he pulls out like a, like a baker's clock, you know, like for like baking, like the timer yet.
Speaker 1:And he's like I'm gonna give you 30 minutes on my time. And he puts it on 30 and it's like ticking away. So now me and him start talking. Sure enough, the the timer goes off. He's like listen, uh, I got some other stuff I got to do, but this is what it sounds like. And he, he's like it sounds like you want to get out of Brooklyn, you want to do some traveling and you want to go to school, but you don't want to take out any loans. Does that? Does that sound right? I was like yeah, pretty much. He's like I can help you. And that's how the whole thing like, kind of like, started.
Speaker 1:Um, though, a few days later, I go down to the meps, I go take the asvab, I go do my, my, my medical stuff, I pass all all that good stuff and, um, he calls me Like three weeks later. He's like listen, I got good and bad news for you. He's like which ones do you want? I was like just whatever, give it to me. He's like well, good news is that you're gonna leave to basic training in a month. Bad news is that you're not. You're not gonna have, you're gonna leave without a job. Ultimately, you're gonna go open. You're on an open contract. When you get down a basic training, you're gonna get a chance to do another Uh uh job counseling session. I was like I had nothing holding me back. I'm gone. That's how I end up joining the air force. Yeah, that was the long version of it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I tell you what you know. It's crazy. We hate you guys, and not because we hate you guys, we hate you guys I. I'll tell you the main reason. Every, every branch knows we always poke fun in the air force because, for some reason, you guys always get the best of the best stuff and we're sitting here, like you know. So how did?
Speaker 2:he get that man. I remember when I was stationed in Pensacola, when I went to our flight school in Pensacola. So if you're in aviation, everyone goes to Pensacola. You guys go there too. And I was sick when I found out that the air force Got an extra stipend to be stationed on Pensacola because the barracks were below their living standards. I was like you got to be kidding me and I thought that was like the best barracks ever been. I was like it was great, I was like yeah, it's so funny, but no, yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2:Um, and I tell you what it's it's interesting how that guy could have easily swayed you If you weren't that persistent. Like you know, I'm going back to the air force recruiter but you knew like you want to do that, so it's just interesting how, like Timing and like circumstance really plays a part in what we do.
Speaker 1:Or what if? What if? He would have just been like no man, you got to come back later, right, I probably wouldn't have come back later, or maybe I would have went and spoke to the army guy, like like who, who knows? Right, I have no clue, you know, but I'll tell you what, like what kept me in the air force, though, which is, I think, is like just as important as to what got me into the air force. I had a hard time, man. I had an extremely hard time, because you got to understand. So I'm 21 years old. I've been on my own since I was 14, right, literally on my own since I was 14, walked out of my mother's apartment in the projects at the age of 14 and Decided that I would not ever come back. You know, it was like cold January or February day, and I was just you know, um. So at the time I didn't know this, but my mom was. She suffered from like bipolar. She was bipolar. All I ever knew was that my mom could flash on any.
Speaker 1:You know, and what I mean flash, like she can spaz out right, she can have an episode right and Then, growing up, you just laugh it off like you know she's a live wire, like she can blow up at any second. Now Just watch what you say around her and but what? But you know, fast forward. What we didn't understand was that this was a mental illness, that that runs in my family and even, like my grandmother, was never diagnosed with being bipolar. But if you sit back and hear the stories you're like, oh man, like maybe, maybe she was bipolar.
Speaker 1:Ultimately, my mom would just fly off the handle, I would get kicked out of the house and I would have to like couchsurf with my friends or family. And that went on for years. Like that went on From the age of Five or six years old all the way through the age of 14. And when I got to 14, this one particular day she kicked me out and I just said to myself Today's the day like I never go back. I like I, I break the cycle today and I ended up renting A room at a halfway house. I did that for like a few weeks and then ultimately, I ended up finding like another place where I could rent out a room and I would play pay weekly. I was like 14 years old.
Speaker 1:Um, the crazy thing is is? Um, the place where I stayed the longest was the? Um, it was my high school girlfriend's uncle and he owned the building and in the building, in the basement, he Framed out four rooms Like dude, literally Jesus framed out these rooms. No kitchen, no, none of that. Um, there was a drop sink in the middle of this area. That's where I would brush my teeth and there was a? Uh, there was a concrete Shower built out like like a, like a shower you would see in Puerto Rico, like small concrete, you know, uh, just literally, just like a pipe coming out of the and um and dude, that's where.
Speaker 1:I lived. I lived there for like almost a almost a year. So I had my room. The guy next to me was, uh, a taxi driver. The guy next to him was in a merengue band and he was gone. Like you know, he was traveling on the road. He was gone, like you know, he was traveling with his band and then the guy Next to him had just been released from prison and he was at Phoenix house. You familiar with Phoenix house. It's like, uh, like, a counseling is transition, it's so. He actually Was a counselor, like a drug counselor, at Phoenix house, but he had just been released from prison. I want to say maybe six months, something like that. So the taxi driver and the merengue guy, they were never around.
Speaker 1:So the only guy that was really around when I would get home for because I worked like three jobs Was the guy from Phoenix house. So, oddly enough, you know, we would spend, you know, maybe 20, 30 minutes in the night. You know, you know he's brushing his teeth. I brushed my teeth and he would just kind of like Believe it or not, he was, he was a mentor. You know what I mean. Like an older guy, I'm trying to get his life back on track.
Speaker 1:I'm a young guy, I'm like the opposite end of the spectrum, spectrum on my own Renting out this room, and all I could ever really gather from like the stuff that he would Pass down to me was like you got, you got to finish school. You got to get, you got to finish high school Because I was in the, I was teetering in between getting my gd, because it was, it seemed like it would just be easier for me to get the gd because I was working so much. And he's like no, no, no, no, no, get the high school diploma, get the high school diploma, which I'm glad that I listened because, although it was hard, that was beneficial In me being able to join the military right, because at that time To come into the air force with the gd, I would have had to have the equivalent of like 60 college credits in order to come in with the high school diploma, which obviously I didn't have at the time. But uh, yeah, man, it was. It was just it was crazy.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, and I'm sure that was hard for you, you know, and looking back now it's like that was so long ago, it's almost like a distant memory, you know, like especially how you're living now. It's like almost like a distant man.
Speaker 1:Oh man, like huge, yeah, huge, like I remember, you know, because because what a lot of folks don't don't realize is that, um and you know I don't share this with that many people, but I guess whoever's gonna listen to this will hear it but there was like a lot of, you know, we were transient, we, we didn't have a lot of money, we were always back, we were in and out of shelters and that kind of thing, and then, finally, we got this apartment and the projects Howard projects in brownsville in the mid 90s, which was I can't even tell you how crazy that was, dude. That was an experience, that was a huge experience, just growing up in that environment. And that's all you know. That's all you know because you know you're only as good as you know. So, whatever you're being exposed to, that's that's really. You know, uh, where it starts, you know so.
Speaker 1:What's funny, though, is a buddy of mine. Uh, he's the one that got me a job doing maintenance in Manhattan. So we would. The first job that I had doing maintenance was all the way in Harlem, so we would take the train from Brooklyn to Harlem. So our our job. We would have to be there at 6 pm and it was like a, like a office building. That's where I learned how to use the stripper machine. That's where I learned all these things. And then eventually, I ended up getting the other job in midtown, which Full circle, where I go back downstairs. I'm not on the schedule. I ended up joining the air force.
Speaker 2:It's wild dude no, definitely, and, like I said, that's part of the journey. You know, it's like I I try to use that as Uh, not just a just a talking point, but let students know, like we all have some journey, we went through some struggle, some struggle more than others. You know, um, you know my mom was a single mom to an immigrant. So not only is a language barrier is also like the resources and finances to do certain things. You know, I'm my, I'm my mom's only child.
Speaker 2:But, my, uh, my father. I have sisters on my father's side, so you know I was thinking about that. You know like they they met here.
Speaker 1:Your mom and dad met in the states. Yeah, yeah, they might in the states. Yes, so they actually met at Job Corps.
Speaker 2:So that's when my parents, my parents, met at Job Corps. Yeah, and that's how they met. So you know, for me, you know I always think about you know growing up of. You know See parents. You know do xyz, or you know your friends are able to go here and go there. You can't go there. You know they have cars. You don't have a car yet to catch public transportation, all these things, and Sometimes you can use that as a motivation to, like make your life better. You know, and it can't be demoralizing when you feel like all hope is gone. You know you have some wild circumstances that are beyond your control and you can't do anything about it. But you know I I had to think about the people who took that adversity and use it as a weapon, as a tool to let a fire under them to make sure they do better. Because the way I am now in my life is I try not to dwell on the excuses like something's always gonna happen, Like I can't be, like oh my god, why is this happening to me?
Speaker 2:I just had to Figure out why it's happening and then make sure I do the proper steps to make sure it doesn't continue or fix my situation, because I look at like no one's coming to save you, especially like us as men, like no one's coming to save us, like if, if we're homeless, like I was thinking about even what's your family right? God forbid, if something happens and you guys lose the house, no one's gonna go to your wife and be like, how come you guys lost the house? They gonna go right to you. Yep, I'm like much, how do you let this happen to your family? Mm-hmm, how you let the house go away, how can? We didn't pay the mortgage or whatever. So no one's coming to save us. So we Kind of had to make sure that we take our bad circumstances and don't let them paralyze us. But, you know, use that as motivation to make sure that we're doing better for us and our families.
Speaker 1:And that that's a that's a really good point. Yeah, like no one's no one's coming, man, you gotta, you gotta, you have to figure this, this one out you know, and to your point, that's where the mentors come in.
Speaker 2:So I believe, we should all have some kind of mentorship, whether it's a family member, could be a captain, could be first sergeant.
Speaker 2:Whoever you look up to that person and they have insight, you know, I think we live in a world where we believe the older generation has nothing to Beneficial to give us, and then we also believe the young people don't know what they're doing. But I believe two things you can be true is the same time. There's a lot of things I learned from my son. My son is my son, just turned 20. There's a lot of things I learned from him that I never would have known Otherwise. Yeah, because he's a little bit younger, but then also I could speak to him from.
Speaker 2:A older man and say, hey, man, don't do this or it's not a good thing, because I did it and it wasn't that favorable. But also I had to be a realist, right, like sometimes kids are gonna make mistakes, they're gonna do things. I remember my son was probably like five at the time he's like four or five and I'll never forget the story. He he was like building legos. He was always good at legos, but he was building the legos and I saw he was doing it wrong. Like in my head I'm like yo, he's messing up, he's a kid, whatever. But he kept trying to figure out I was doing it wrong and I was like, hey, aunt, his name is Anthony. By calling me aunt, I was like, hey, aunt. I was like you know, you're doing it wrong, man, you gotta do XYZ mine.
Speaker 2:It's like a four-year-old. He looked at me. He was like Dad, I gotta make my own mistakes. He went right back to like doing a Dropping gems. I was like what? He said my hand.
Speaker 2:I'm like, did he just I was like he's right, he has to make his own mistakes and even he knows Like, yeah, I might be doing this wrong, but like I have to figure this out. As a little boy he realized he had to figure out this problem because you know I can't help him. I mean, I could help him but It'll be more beneficial to him to kind of get it on his own.
Speaker 2:So I think that's where we have to realize like, yes, things happen, we have a, you know, unforeseen circumstances. Some people have it really hard. You know, some people have to struggle. As a kid, they're struggling finding their way. Maybe they have both their parents and have the money. You know, I took about, though my mom. Like I took about, like I remember like there's times where, like my mom didn't eat, so I can eat, like I was thinking about that, you know.
Speaker 2:And then now like my mom can eat anywhere she wants to eat For the most part, you know. So it's. It is humbling and we have to remember, just because we grew up a certain way doesn't mean that's it for us, Like there is an escape, you know whether it's military whether it's. You know you're artists, whether you know you play a sport, whether you're really smart. I remember me at back in the day they used to make fun of you for like being intelligent. Right, this guy's reading books. Yeah, nerd, yeah now.
Speaker 2:Being a nerd is like cool, it's cool to wear glasses, it's cool to read, it's cool to be in the tech you know, in Legos and bill stuff. So we can't let other people and like other things Kind of stop us from like doing what we have to do. And I think the mentorship is a big key. Like I, I wish I got my mentors. I'm grateful for all the mentors I had, whether it's military, whether it's rockers, whether it's just in my life in general. My only regret is I wish I had those mentors early on in my life, no, when I um.
Speaker 2:When I first joined the Air.
Speaker 1:Force. My tech school was so short. So for those listening who are not familiar with, tech school is In the military, in the Air Force, like you'll go to basic training and it's changed. You know, I think when I went through it was like six or seven weeks, it went up to like eight changes. But ultimately when you're done with with basic training, you go off to Tech school to learn your job before you go to your first operational base. My school, my tech school, was only six weeks long, so we were okay. Tech school was only six weeks long so we were called pop tarts Because we were just up and out quick.
Speaker 1:So within a matter of six months, less than six months, I go from living in brooklyn Living in a shelter. So all of a sudden Now I'm in the Air Force and I'm done with all my training and I just get to my first base in Charleston, south Carolina. So when I get there, you know my transition is hard, man, because I I went From Brooklyn, new York, to now, all of a sudden, charleston, south Carolina, oh, and guess what, you're in the military. You know it's a lot to kind of like Take in all at one time when I, when I go when I reflect back on the mentors. There was a, there was a guy that really, um, they were calling him and I've mentioned that before on here but uh, they were calling him like master sergeant rodie and what that really meant was retired on active duty because he was like six months out from getting out, okay, yeah but he took the time Prior to him fully, you know transitioning.
Speaker 1:He took the time to speak to me every day for about 15 to 20 minutes, sometimes even a little longer. So what. One of the key things that I got from him early on was uh, you know, um, what time? Uh, what time do you show up for work? Right, well, what time does your day start? Oh, my day starts at 7 30. No, your day starts at 7. You need to be here at 7, go through your emails, this, that the other you know be. You need to be ready to go at 7 30. Okay, um, what time do you get off for work? Or I get off at 4 30? No, you get off at 4 45. No matter what, you don't leave until 4 45. Okay, do you know how to make? Make a pot of coffee? No, learn how to make a pot of coffee. That's the first thing you do when you get into the office and make a pot of coffee. I'm like okay. And then the last thing was like, um, if there's nothing else going on, pick up a broom. You know, like so.
Speaker 1:So I started doing exactly so, like, ultimately, what I didn't realize what was happening was the narrative. I start Painting this narrative for myself. Right shows up early, leaves late you know he's a doer, right team player, that kind of thing and slowly Things just start working out In my favor, right, the opportunities start present to present themselves and things start to develop, to develop before you know it. A year has gone by, a year and a half has gone by, and now that transition part of actually being in the military was not that difficult, was not that hard. So I'm always, so I'm always grateful and there's a lot of other things that came out of, came out of those mentoring sessions, you know, like the importance of um just Getting into real estate and like not not getting into a vehicle with a high apr, which is what, instinctively, I was gonna end up.
Speaker 2:I think we all end up doing that. This is on the grid, right? Yeah, no, 25% apr of some like charger some Criminals absolute criminal, that they that even exist.
Speaker 1:You know. But, but, yeah, man, but you know, things start slowly turning themselves around before you know it, man, I'm just I'm, you know, getting things done and and and I'm enjoying what I'm doing. And, um, yeah, because it was honestly, dennis, like I really thought that I was gonna get booted out of the military. I didn't think I was in a last a year, I was. It was just like and and again. There's some other things that that go in line with that. But, like you know, just to give you some, you know context, you know, like my very first day showing up to my first base, I'm in my service dress. You know my supervisor, you know. You know how we were saying like take the good and the bad from folks or whatever. You know my immediate supervisor was like what are you doing here? She's like you guys normally join the army.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we mean you guys, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, dude, and I'm so like, like I'm not stupid, but I'm smart enough to know, like don't start, no shit. You just got here, yeah, don't you know, don't rock the boat, right, so, um, but you know, that was the first thing that was said to me. That was the very first thing that was said to me. I'm our first day. What are you doing here? You guys normally join the army and, yeah, and the battle started from there, dude, the battle of um, you know, uh, finding your worth, um being resilient, you know moving forward and and um not letting you know, uh, the naysayers, you know, bring you down. You know what I mean. Yeah, man, it was wild.
Speaker 2:No, and that's crazy, because I think we all have a story like that and it's interesting to see how you know, uh things, some things change, but some things don't change, and that even goes into like stereotypes, right. It's like there's gonna be that person who Assumes that you don't belong just because you look differently or you don't meet some criteria, like, oh how, this guy getting here, what do you mean?
Speaker 2:I had to, I had to go through school and do xyz and this guy's in here, like this guy, you know. So, um To your point, it's like those naysayers are. They're always going to be there, whether it's Early on in a career or later on when you transition, do something else. So I just try to Be mindful of what's said to me that way, if it happens again, I'm like okay, oh, okay, it's what we're doing. All right, cool, bet you know.
Speaker 1:You know what's really interesting, though, dennis is like so, um, I just retired, right, and at my retirement ceremony, part of the presiding officers speech is they're speaking to the folks in attendance, like your family and fellow service members, commanders, they're, they're giving these folks a snapshot of your career. So they're, you know, they start in the beginning, they work to the middle and then they get to the end of your career, but it's a ceremony, so it can't go that long, right, like you know, and people's attention span is Is very little. So One of the things that I'm not sure if I mentioned or not, but throughout the whole 10 or 15 minutes of Someone describing my career right, describing it from the very beginning to how I completed they're articulating the highs, but at no point are we focusing on the lows. So, out of 24 years, it hasn't been like this the whole time. Right, it's been like this.
Speaker 1:You know, and I try to tell folks all the time is like, you know, if you're in a bad spot because we've all been there if you're in a bad spot, I think it's important to understand that it's just a season, it's going to pass, but you have to continue, you have to stay the course, and one of the things that you have control over is your attitude. It's your attitude when you put on your uniform and you step out of the door for that day of service or that day of work, whatever you want to call it. The one thing that you control is your attitude. So if you want to show up to the job in a bad mood or because things are maybe not going in your direction or how you would hope they would go, at least your attitude you're in control over. You know. So you could show up with a positive attitude. It might not be easy, but that's one thing that you have control over. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:So Absolutely and to your point, even with the uniform. I also say too when we put the uniform on, we're not just representing us, we're representing the branch right. So when? You wear that uniform, you're an airman, you're representing the Air Force. So then I got to look at like, oh, this Puerto Rican guy said something. No, you're like oh, this airman said something on behalf of the Air Force. So it's kind of like you're representing just it's bigger than yourself.
Speaker 1:You know, like on our uniforms, right your name normally goes your name's on your right side and your service is over your heart. Right is on your left side. So I had a supervisor that you said to me he was like hey, who do you work for? Do you work for OITs or do you work for us US?
Speaker 2:Air Force. Yes, right, yeah, yeah, who do you?
Speaker 1:work for Today. Who are you working for? It was always like I work for us, you know Wow yeah, yeah, I didn't think about that one.
Speaker 2:It's pretty good, yeah.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. So, yeah, man, just trying to. It's funny when you reflect back on those days, and sometimes you know when I'm speaking to like one of my younger troops and they're going through like something devastating is going on. You know it's when you have an extensive career, with all of these ups and downs, you can wholeheartedly speak to these younger folks and tell them listen, it's going to be okay, it's going to be okay, you're going to make it through this. This is a season, this is going to pass. But if you didn't have any kind of a background or experience in adversity or being challenged, and yet here you are telling this person, yeah, everything's going to be okay, but you've never experienced anything difficult in your career, it doesn't add up. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:It doesn't matter. They say you can test a person's character by three things when you give them money, when you give them power, or when they're scared or fear right. So when you get someone money, it just kind of enhances what they already are. If you're a jerk making 30K, you're going to be a mega jerk making 300K. It's not going to be nicer about it, right?
Speaker 2:Same thing with power. Like if you're a jerk without any power, we think it's going to happen to you. With that person's power, they're going to be worse, and the fear of a scared one is that's how you could tell if someone was a coward or not. Right? If something scary happens or an emergency happens, they fold or they spring into action and that's where our population comes in, right. Like they say like what? 2% of the people join the military? Because if it was easy, everyone would do it.
Speaker 1:It might be less than that. It might be less than that, right, it might be less than that, yeah.
Speaker 2:Not everyone joins the military is a reason for that right. A lot of training, a lot of studying, a lot of hours staying up right Time away from your family, time away from your home All these things that most people don't want to sign up for. Like who wants to sign up for training for 10 plus weeks out the year? No one. Who wants to sign up for not seeing your family six or seven months out the year? No one wants to sign up for that. Who wants to sign up for possibly being in danger and or dying to protect your country? Most people don't want to do that.
Speaker 2:So, when you trim it down, there's a small population of us who actually answered the call, like you know what.
Speaker 2:This is something bigger than me, because I don't care what branch you're in, whether it's Navy, coast Guard, air Force, marines, every service member who joins the military.
Speaker 2:In the back of their head, they know that there is a chance they could die In any capacity, whether it's on base, whether it's training you could be a Yeoman or pushing pencils and personnel. We're all trained and qualified to fire a weapon for a specific reason, in case the base gets attacked or something happens. So we have to realize that even though we're not picking the most dangerous job we're not picking security forces or tier one or operator. We might be maintenance, but guess what, everyone in maintenance knows how to fire a weapon, and that's for a reason. So a lot of people aren't signing up to be like, okay, I want to do this dangerous thing and put my life at risk. So the ones who do do that, we have a certain thing about us, that kind of that switch like where, yeah, you might be scared, but we're still going to do what we have to do in spite of us being scared.
Speaker 2:I think that's the difference between us and the regular civilians, where it's not about being scared. It's about doing what you're supposed to do in lieu of you being scared or terrified, and that's where the honor, courage and commitment comes in right.
Speaker 1:Dennis, before I forget, I really want to make sure that what your current position is at the moment at Rutgers, that folks that are hearing this have a full understanding of what exactly your organization does. Can you just tap on that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely so. I work at Rutgers University, but specifically for the Office of Veteran and Military Programs and Services. Our main job is to assist all of our military affiliated students who are attending universities. So, whether it's active duty, a dependent national guard, reservists, any student who's military affiliated and using any kind of GI bill benefits or any kind of national guard benefits, they all go through our office, and the reason for that is to make sure that they have a smooth transition from going from military to civilian and that they're not missing out on any benefits or resources that are available to them at the university.
Speaker 1:Oh, wow, okay, man, that must keep you busy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it does, it does yeah. So, as a whole, rutgers University has about 2000 military affiliated students all three of the campuses, so Norc, camden, new Brunswick I believe Camden has around 400 military, norc has around 600 and New Brunswick, which is my campus, we have the most. We have around like a thousand.
Speaker 1:Wow Okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah so, and it does get challenging because their age ranges from 24 to 64, depending on the students. So, yeah, we have some. We have some some students who just got the military. They've been in 20 years and they're like, hey, I want to go to school. Some of these guys and guys have been in school in 20 plus years, so we kind of help them with their transition. We have also students who are dependents. Maybe their parent is still in the military and they're using their parents GI bill and we just help them navigate the whole processes. You know what their benefits are and what they can and can't use. Wow.
Speaker 2:And then also on top of that we have different resources at the university to assist our veteran and military students with any that with disability or you know they have questions about a specific department. So it's kind of like all in one stop shop. But we really don't like to call it that because, yes, it's like a, it's like all in one stop shop. But also, if we can facilitate what you need, we have different points of contact in each department to assist with us to help the students Got it Wow.
Speaker 1:And how does your radio station fall in line with what you're doing?
Speaker 2:So I have my own radio show at Rutgers University, rutgers Radio called the veterans corner, where we discuss military affiliated issues and topics that surround the campus or surround our community. So it's not yeah it's not limited to just Rutgers stuff. It could be, for example, someone like you who has her who's military and has her own podcast. So the real niche is our military affiliated population in our area and what they're doing in their community.
Speaker 2:So it just happens to showcase it, so a lot of it is. And or Rutgers alum, who just happened to be military, but it also could be someone like you has her own podcast. Or maybe someone who's military, who is a realtor now or maybe someone who was their father was military, and they use the GI bill. Now they're a doctor and now they work at the VA, so it's just a different slew of military affiliated people and their contributions to our community.
Speaker 1:And that's great, that's.
Speaker 2:that's how long have you had the radio station, so I've had it. This is my fourth year having it.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:I was a co-host up until last year. So up until last year I was only the co-host of the show. But the host, uh, don Busney. He's a retired Marine Corps officer. He retired last year. So once he retired, to your point, I had to step up and take over the show.
Speaker 1:The natural order Right. Natural order things.
Speaker 2:So you're right, everything does come through a circle. So I never saw myself as being a host. I was, so I'll just be the co-host and do whatever. But you know, to your point, when Don retired, I'm the next logical choice because they're not going to find someone else to do it. Right, I'm already there, right.
Speaker 1:Exactly, yeah, Especially if you have a rhythm and you know how. Yeah, no, for sure. Wow, that's pretty. What, what, um, what's coming up in this this school year, um, that you guys are planning for? So the organization.
Speaker 2:So we have a whole bunch of events that we're doing. We have a, uh, it's a mixture of professional development and recreation, so, uh, whether it's a VA workshop where we have people from the VA actually come into our office and give, like, free sessions or seminars, whether it's someone who helps with resumes, whether it's, uh, relaxation tips for taking a test, you know, resources available at the university. So, basically, uh, we have to showcase all available resources, uh, that are available to university and our, the Serratic community, through the students who may not necessarily be familiar with it. Like, two weeks ago, we had, uh, someone come up from the VA to talk about how to apply for a VA loan, what the criteria is, what are the things you need.
Speaker 2:So many things we really don't learn when you go out to military. We're thinking, oh, we'll just get out and do whatever, but these, uh, these resources are available to us and there's, you know, it's also a way for us to save money. You know, like the VA loan for people who aren't aware of the VA loan is a godsend to most of our population, because if it wasn't for that, we wouldn't be able to get a house otherwise without that, you know so, yeah, my first homeless person is with the VA loan.
Speaker 1:Um man, that's wild. This is what I want to ask you in terms of like fulfillment knowing that you have access to roughly a thousand folks at your, at your one campus, being able to provide service and help these folks get where it is they're trying to get to. That's got to feel good, right?
Speaker 2:No, it does feel good and I tell you what it. It sounds corny but it does feel good because I, I believe I'm giving back and I I was told myself, I remember and it's kind of back to the military right. It's like I remember when I was that new person who was green, super bug-eyed GI Joe, gunk, hoe, and I didn't know anything and I wish there was somebody like me that helped me back in the day. So what I try to do is I try to make sure that all the students I come across, who come through our office, I give them the same help I wish somebody would have gave me when I first got out the military, not knowing anything, trying to navigate Google and find this person and use my GI bill and try to go to school.
Speaker 2:all this information that I missed out on that I didn't know so and you don't know what you don't know. So if you don't have the question, you can't ask and no one's going to volunteer and say hey, by the way, you should be doing XYZ unless you asked. So I use this as a way to kind of get back to my community and but also help the younger people and the people like me who are trying to start over and start their second chapter of their life after the military, and make sure they're successful.
Speaker 1:Man. I think for a lot of us with military experience and commitment to service, when we transition, I think instinctively we want to find positions where we feel like we're giving back, or whether there's like a clear way to feel fulfilled, If that makes any sense. No, definitely.
Speaker 2:And I tell you what I was. Even I was talking about this to one of my coworkers, I was like, if you think about it, this is no different than what I was doing at my last command. Right, I have my last command. I had new sailors coming in. Hey, do this, don't do that. This is what you got to do.
Speaker 2:This is what's available to you. I'm just out of college. Now New people come in. Hey, do this. Don't do that. It's what you can do. If you have any questions, let me know. So I'm essentially doing the same thing I was doing in the military, just on the civilian side. So I think that's what I feel so comfortable. For me, too, it's more of what I already know and what I've been doing already.
Speaker 1:Man, listen, we're lucky to have you. Our community is lucky to have you. I appreciate that. You know what I mean. I appreciate it Transitioning young men and women leaving the service trying to figure out what the next chapter is going to be in their life. To have someone like yourself with such good experience, to be the middle part for someone, or not even the middle part.
Speaker 2:Also like a bridge. The bridge right.
Speaker 1:To help folks transition. Again, we're lucky to have you. And I say that as a community, we're lucky to have you and folks like you that are committed to the well-being of our transitioning service members. Is there anything else you want to tap on that I might have missed?
Speaker 2:I would just say I would like to give some advice to any service members and or family who may be listening. We come from a culture of tough it out. Don't be the weakest link in the height of mental health and us losing people unnecessarily to suicide and things like that. Let's just make sure that we ask for the help when we need it.
Speaker 2:We appreciate the service. We understand where you come from. We have to also focus on ourselves and make sure that we're doing our due diligence for ourselves and for our families. If you need the help, it's okay. If you're feeling sad, it's okay. If you need to go see a therapist, that's also okay. If you have to get a hobby to keep you interested, or whatever you need to do to protect your mental health and wealth, by all means take care of it and don't neglect it. Don't think that you'll be shamed for saying that you don't feel well, whether it's physically or mentally. I just think about all the unnecessarily people we lost just because they didn't want to ask for help, because they're worried about being shamed or they're worried about they be perceived as weak. We have to get rid of that toxic mindset. Us asking for help is a sign of weakness.
Speaker 1:I couldn't agree with you more 100%. For myself, I think I've been in unique positions where I have been an airman, I have been an NCO, I have been a senior NCO and, ultimately, finishing out my career as a first sergeant. Where you are, the buck stops with you as a first sergeant. You have someone in your unit who's going through tough times or struggling mentally. It ultimately stops with you in terms of getting that person to the proper helping agency. What I will say is there's tons of help out there. There's tons of help, but with the question that I like to ask folks is why are folks not being helped?
Speaker 1:And I think sometimes it takes the person who's in need of this assistance to have trust and faith in their leadership to help them navigate. If the folks in your unit do not have trust in you, you've lost. How do you get them to trust you? How do you get them to understand that you are going to be committed in whatever it is they have going on in their lives to get them on the right track, to get them better? But ultimately, if they don't trust you, when the environment changes and now it's a deployed environment how do you expect for this person to come to you with any sort of issue if they don't trust you. So I think, for those that are listening, if you're in a position of leadership and you do not have the full trust of the members of your unit, I think you need to do some reflection.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and I just want to add one more thing Also it's okay to be vulnerable with your junior listed. You'd be surprised how much they would open to you if you are relatable. You're not just the first sergeant who's just knife handed him every day, because he's messing up.
Speaker 2:You might have him know that. Hey, guess what? I was an E3 too. I know it sounds far-fetched, but I was you at one point, and you can show them that there is a different path. It's not just a linear path of success. There's different avenues. You might hit a couple hurdles, but it's not how you start, it's how you finish.
Speaker 1:Brother. Well said, my man. I think we can leave it there, dennis, mr Penny as some will call you. Thank you again, much appreciated. Thank you for coming out to Spark and Stride, for being an early supporter of Spark and Stride. There is so much that you and I, I think, offline we want to get into and give back to our community at the university level as well as our community here within the tri-state area. So I look forward to us working together in the near future.
Speaker 2:Definitely I mean Jeff Mosh. Thank you for having me Shout out to Spark and Stride for having me. I love the platform. You guys go follow him. Hopefully I'll be back on.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And we're definitely going to be collabing on some stuff too, for our community and also for our service members. So thank you guys for having me.
Speaker 1:Brother, thank you very much. Thanks for being here. Thanks, man, stay Spark, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done, we're done. We're completely out of tune. No-transcript.