Embracing Visibility for Personal Growth and Collective Connection
May 13, 2024Season 1Episode 6
Shea & Stella
Embark on a journey to the subconscious with Stella and Shea Pestell as we uncover the feeling of being invisible. Have you ever considered how past experiences have sculpted your coping mechanisms, leading you to find solace in the shadows? Our candid discussion dissects the belief that being unseen is synonymous with safety, offering pathways to rewrite this narrative. We reveal how awareness of moments where visibility equates to comfort can be the stepping stones toward establishing new patterns of self-worth. By embracing the challenge to be seen in the simple, everyday instances, we guide you towards anchoring a sense of worthiness deep within your nervous system.
This episode is not just about the self; it's about the collective energy we share and the love and connections that enrich our lives. Together with Stella, we delve into the art of expanding your heart's reach, making you a magnet for meaningful relationships. Learn the importance of radiating the right energy and how your serene presence can profoundly touch others. We converse on the necessity of embodying the traits we desire in others and the power of intentional action in fostering a supportive network. As we bring the conversation full circle, we remind you that personal development isn't merely a solo voyage—it's a generous contribution to the world, much like the oxygen shared by trees. So, lean in as we navigate the invisible threads that intertwine our lives, leaving you with insights ripe for reflection on your journey to greater visibility and connection.
Embark on a journey to the subconscious with Stella and Shea Pestell as we uncover the feeling of being invisible. Have you ever considered how past experiences have sculpted your coping mechanisms, leading you to find solace in the shadows? Our candid discussion dissects the belief that being unseen is synonymous with safety, offering pathways to rewrite this narrative. We reveal how awareness of moments where visibility equates to comfort can be the stepping stones toward establishing new patterns of self-worth. By embracing the challenge to be seen in the simple, everyday instances, we guide you towards anchoring a sense of worthiness deep within your nervous system.
This episode is not just about the self; it's about the collective energy we share and the love and connections that enrich our lives. Together with Stella, we delve into the art of expanding your heart's reach, making you a magnet for meaningful relationships. Learn the importance of radiating the right energy and how your serene presence can profoundly touch others. We converse on the necessity of embodying the traits we desire in others and the power of intentional action in fostering a supportive network. As we bring the conversation full circle, we remind you that personal development isn't merely a solo voyage—it's a generous contribution to the world, much like the oxygen shared by trees. So, lean in as we navigate the invisible threads that intertwine our lives, leaving you with insights ripe for reflection on your journey to greater visibility and connection.
Speaker 1:
welcome to our podcast. Hypnotherapy for the soul.
Speaker 2:
This is your host, shea pestle, and this is my co-host where we explore the power of hypnosis and connect to inner wisdom.
Speaker 1:
For answers through our episodes, we share behind the scenes live sessions to help you tap into your inner guidance.
Speaker 2:
Join us on this journey of self-discovery and utilize the power of hypnosis to connect to your higher self. Today's episode is on a limiting belief I am invisible. If you feel that you are invisible or overlooked by others and you would like to start believing that you're worthy of being seen and heard, this episode might just be what you need. My friend and co-host, shay, is going to be asking me a series of questions directed towards my higher self. The higher self is the part of us that knows everything about us and is also tapped into the collective intelligence. For your best and most valuable experience, I invite you to be open while you listen, because that way you can connect to your inner wisdom and receive guidance. And just a heads up, you won't hear the part in which Shay takes me into the hypnotic state of mind, which is a state where we can access the information of our subconscious mind. Okay, without further ado, let's see a higher perspective on I'm Invisible limiting belief. Enjoy.
Speaker 1:
Thank you for being here, and I just got a few questions for you, based on limiting beliefs, and the limiting belief we're going to talk about is I'm invisible, and so why do I feel like I'm invisible or overlooked by others?
Speaker 2:
The easiest way to answer this is that is a coping mechanism. The easiest way to answer this is that is a coping mechanism. So in your past, this is what made you feel safe and this is still in your subconscious mind. This pattern is still playing itself because it wants to protect you. It's really as easy as that, you. It's really as easy as that. So, going back and figuring out to that first event in your life when one part of you decided that it wasn't safe for you to be seen in any way, either seen with your caregivers or society, because being seen would inflict pain and made you feel that you either wouldn't get love, would lose connection or be threatened in some way.
Speaker 1:
Wow, thank you so much, and can you please guide me in understanding any underlying emotions or fears that contribute to this belief?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, usually is just fear of survival, and because this is how our brain is wired, its main job is to keep us alive, no matter the cost. And, for example, as I mentioned earlier, with fear or with belief, I'm invisible. It's like, if I'm visible. Or with belief, I'm invisible. It's like, if I'm visible, it's not safe. And then what is interesting is to question so what does it happen when I am visible? Because it probably evokes a lot of feelings of discomfort and because it might be even you or not, it's not something that is comfortable or common for you. So, for example, if you then ask, okay, so if I am now visible, what comes up for me?
Speaker 2:
Is it shame or is it people are going to think this or do that, or there can be a number of things how this can play out, but all really stems from just fear of survival, and fear of survival is closely linked to fear of getting love and connection. So that's in its core, but it can play out in different ways. So it's really important to see how is it playing out for you specifically, and I can give an example how is it playing out for for Barchi? So this fear of being visible was making her contract because she was afraid that people would make fun of her, because that was her reality when she was a teenager. Yeah, by being bullied, and that was the thing and it's. It's obviously deeper than that and I don't want to expand on that, but just to give you an an example. It can be really.
Speaker 1:
It's usually very simple and very straightforward okay, perfect, and based on that, what would be maybe, if we were to identify and challenge of any negative thought patterns or beliefs that reinforce the feeling of being invisible that can relate to maybe experiencing a challenge like that?
Speaker 2:
so so how do we challenge that Okay?
Speaker 1:
Not challenge that but, like you know, the reinforcement of those feelings of feeling invisible. What is the negative thought patterns around that?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, it's really again all about safety.
Speaker 2:
And if one is focused just on something is not safe, what can we do is introduce or search for the opposite experience.
Speaker 2:
And because there are certain moments, I'm sure, in everyone's life, when being seen is actually safe and maybe that is as simple as being seen with our pets, or a cat or a dog, or and just anchoring or just stepping into or even having awareness of that feeling, how it is, for example, being seen by, let's say, your cat, and your cat just accepts you as you are and you can be seen, you can just be yourself, and how does that feel in your body?
Speaker 2:
And really tapping into that and because you have an experience where being seen is okay, that means that it's not always unsafe. And then instead of feeling, oh, how can I get rid of that, how can I get rid of feeling unsafe? We can actually extend or expand rather a feeling of when we do feel it safe and just experience more of that, just bringing attention or and putting more of our energy into that belief to slowly reinforcing it and anchoring it in our nervous system and is there any other more ways of starting to believe that I am worthy being seen and heard, for example?
Speaker 2:
I would say, find all the proof where being seen is okay. So that's one thing, as I mentioned earlier, because what usually can happen is that people dismiss little steps. But little steps are really important. So, for example, every day one can just allow themselves to be consciously aware of being seen with, as I said, either a cat or even a family member or a friend that really loves and accepts them, and they have this conscious awareness of how their body feels, what their thoughts are and feelings and everything. Then they can ease into that feeling more often and just slowly introduce that feeling or introduce that concept to other experiences in life. So they don't have a person, doesn't have to go from either hiding directly to speaking on stage, directly to speaking on stage, but they can build little steps.
Speaker 2:
And also, the other thing is, which has been helpful, take advantage of all these practices that are out there either meditation to have awareness, to gain more awareness of your feelings, certain exercises, your feelings, certain exercises, whatever they feel, I mean whatever you feel are beneficial for you, for example yoga or jogging or whatever, and so that's that. And also practices such as hypnotherapy or others that can really help you get to the core issue and switch that emotion, neutralize it, dismantle it, and then you are free of that and then you can build on top of that. It's easier to build a new foundation once this charge is removed or at least neutralized. I should say neutralized, because it's not removed, it's just transformed into something else wonderful, thank you.
Speaker 1:
And what are some other maybe practical strategies that someone could use in their everyday life? You've mentioned a few, but maybe someone say doesn't want to do hypnosis or some other deep dives. What's some other, just habits they can get into?
Speaker 2:
okay. So if they have awareness of and let's say I'll, I'll give this example so they have awareness of when it's safe to be seen, because I'm sure there is a moment or there are situations in everyone's lives that being seen is okay, that's one thing. And then finding the opposite, what is the opposite of that, like, what are the situations that being seen is just not possible in any way, or maybe even feeling that I'm never seen, or when I'm in certain situations, they never see me, and what you can do is for that one, you can maybe even trace back and try to find when did similar occurrences start or when did you have similar occurrences in your life, and then just checking what are the similarities between them. What is it that you, what is your belief of something that is preventing you or that it's making it mean that it's not safe for you to be seen? Just on the rational end. And then find a situation that could be a little bit of a stretch, because without any stretch, you can just stay in your comfort zone, stay where you are.
Speaker 2:
So think of something.
Speaker 2:
Think of, let's say, you have a group of friends and they might not include you in their conversation as much as you would like to.
Speaker 2:
So what about if you just initiate certain conversations or talk about something that you're excited, or just do certain things and then see how it feels? Or go to I don't know, maybe coffee shop and have a quick conversation with a barista or someone else, just something that is a little bit outside of comfort zone, but not too much, not to the extreme, that would be too much, that would shut you down. And then the most important thing with that is have a playful approach, because your brain make it mean that it's unsafe, but in reality you're an adult, you can handle everything right now. I mean you can handle not being seen. It's not life-threatening, right? So think of it. How about if I just play this game? And now I decided I'll just like to explore how feeling seen feels and let's just play with that, so switching it around and making it more fun, more joyful, not so serious yeah, that can be one of the approaches.
Speaker 1:
Okay, awesome, and I just have my own personal question. That comes up for me and what I think about is so, basically, you probably do want to be invisible to certain people, so how does that look like?
Speaker 2:
did you avoid certain people actually?
Speaker 1:
not necessarily avoidance. But how do you attract the right people? You know there's a good thing about being invisible, because you don't want to be seen by everyone. Not everyone's your friend. So how do you attract who's right for you and who's not?
Speaker 2:
Okay, that's a great question, Again, focusing on what you want more of. For example, when you said you want to be invisible to some people, and I can give an example you want to be invisible to some people and I can give an example. Say that you're walking down the street and there are some dodgy looking people, maybe a little gang or something and you might be thinking, oh no, you know, the last thing I want right now is to be mugged. That's just an example. Maybe that's not what you were thinking, but I'll go with that and please share if you're more specific later. So, instead of jumping into that fear and oh my god, you know what you can do is shift into acknowledge the fear or whatever rises up and then be okay, what do I want? Okay, what do I want like, what do I want? Or just connect to trust or energy of love or anything like that. Because the funny thing is, when you focus more and I know it can sound really woo, woo and stuff, but when you focus more on expression or expansion of love, the thing is people, the right people, will come closer, because you will want to cultivate more of that and especially because that's something that will feel that feels good in your body and if you want to expand that, that also means that you're giving that to other people and they can expand it. So the right people who want more of that will come.
Speaker 2:
And people who don't want that, people who want either drama or problems or whatever they might not even come close.
Speaker 2:
Or even if they do, they might, obviously they all can come close but they won't get the satisfaction from you because you are not energetic match and you won't get caught up in the same energy. For example, yeah, if someone is afraid and if someone is calm and if that person that is calm they remain calm it can actually help the other person shift. Or if that doesn't happen, this person who's afraid will just go away, because being around someone who's calm might not be their default, might not be something that they want to experience, or their comfort zone feels like Because, even though we all say, oh, we want love, we want love, but in reality can we allow that feeling in our body or are we also unconsciously just drawn into some type of drama or fear? And there is no judgment here, but only it's important to have awareness. So if you have all these feelings of fear, you will probably attract people who have more fear than not. It's just how it is. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1:
Definitely Well, that awareness of that. But ideally.
Speaker 2:
What kind of people would you like to surround yourself with? Be specific, and also, what does that feel in your body and what would that do to you If you had the best support system? Do to you If you had the best support system. What would that do to you? And you can even ask yourself this how is not having support system benefiting you? Now, if that is your reality and that can be a little bit of tricky question but if you're honest you might see that there might be certain beliefs that are in the way, and if you recognize those beliefs, you can then start building and expanding on the ones that you want by simply acting them out. One thing is to have mental awareness, and then what we need to do is embody that by taking deliberate and intentional action.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, wonderful, thank you. Is there anything else you'd like to share in regards to this?
Speaker 2:
yeah, that you are visible on all levels. Even if you feel you're not invisible, there is something in you and you can imagine. I mean, you probably imagine that the energy is like, let's say, the energy is tangible. Imagine that there is always this cloud of energy that you are in and then just expands through your physical body, which is also called aura. But let's just go with this image and say that you have this program or belief I'm invisible.
Speaker 2:
So when we walk around with that belief, what we're doing is we are not talking about it, right, but we are signaling that belief subconsciously to the world, and then the world responds and the world can respond to all these different ways. But the thing is, even the fact that the world responds means that you are not really invisible. You're just choosing to not connect because connection is not safe. And again we are back at safety and figuring out how to be safe, how to feel safe in your body, how to feel safe with other people and just being in the world. So I think I can just wrap up with that thought.
Speaker 1:
That kind of sparked an idea in my head when you mentioned how the world responds to you anyways. Isn't that the illusion that we're experiencing? The external world is a reflection of our inner world, and so why do we need to be seen anyways? Why do we want support from outside anyways? Isn't that just an indication that we need to be seen and supportive of ourselves first?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, that is true, we need to be supportive of ourselves ourselves. But the fact that someone wants also to be seen, it also might lead to because there might be different desires behind. If being seen feels like, oh, I just want to be seen, so then I will feel loved, that might not go as far because if I want to kind of accept myself first, but but the thing is, if I want to be seen because I have this intention of connection and with connecting with others, I can be part of it, part of this experience of earth, of flow, and just everything here is in constant movement. And if I don't participate in it, if I check out, it's almost like I'm denying not just my self-love but I'm also denying everyone else that I can connect with and contribute to. Like, imagine that a tree would be like oh, I'm providing this oxygen, but it's just for me, I'm not giving it, it's just mine, it's all about me.
Speaker 2:
I mean, it doesn't really work this way, because if we are connected to everything, that means that if I'm working on myself, I'm also contributing to everyone else's best selves and that is expansion. So just me having this desire of being seen, for example, or being acknowledged, can also lead to. I want to be acknowledged by right people so that what I have, this energy, can multiply and can be more of that and it can cover I don't want to say darkness, but just things that are not, that are in the way of just our pure expression and love. So I see it more as expansion and also allowing to feel that, allowing ourselves to have these desires. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1:
Definitely does. Thank you so much. Is there any final notes you'd like to make or a sign off?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, the final thing I would like to say is that this topic is nuanced and there are probably very different versions to what I shared, and it's really important that what I shared is seen or expressed or felt as a view or as a truth, not the truth. So I would invite everyone just to tap into your curiosity and see where it lands, because it might, in the best way it can, open up something really magical and, in the worst way, it can just provide knowing that this doesn't align and that's totally okay. So always listen to yourself, be your own best authority. And, yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1:
Thank you so much for all your beautiful insights today. Appreciate you.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, likewise, thank you.
Speaker 1:
Thank you for listening to Hypnotherapy for the Soul, brought to you by myself, shea Pestel, and my friend and co-host, stella, where we share with you behind the scenes live hypnotherapy sessions to give you the authentic experience of what it means to connect to your subconscious mind that you can tap into. Please follow us at hypnotherapyforthesoulcom. See you in the next episode.
