The Dark Side of being a Gay Man: Mystery Drownings & Dating App Dangers? 🌊📱🔍 | Episode 9

Dive into a chilling exploration of the unsolved drownings in Austin, Texas, and the looming dangers within the world of dating apps. In this captivating episode, we attempt to unearth the truth behind the mysterious drownings the police are calling "accidental" of up to 18 fit, 30-something men in Lady Bird Lake. But how does the digital age exacerbate these fears, and is there a link between these tragedies and platforms like Grindr? 📲 From personal, spine-tingling tales from Adam, Blaine, and Ryan of close encounters to thought-provoking discussions on social media's role, get ready for an intense caffeine hit with Coffee with Gays. ☕🌈

Show Notes:

0:15 - Introduction: The baffling case of "Scared Gays" 🌙 and the alleged drownings in Austin's Lady Bird Lake.

2:00 - Layout of Austin and insights into Lady Bird Lake 🗺️.

3:05 - Our frustrations with Austin's police response to the drownings 😡.

3:31 - A deep dive into Ford Sanders' report on Jonathan Honey and Jason John, and the pressing need for better safety measures 🚫🏊.

4:48 - Ken Waks' peculiar investigations linked to the drownings and his odd claims 🤔.

6:27 - Barry Schmalbach's disappearance: A nationwide problem? 🌍

7:06 - Grindr's role in the modern gay experience and potential hazards 🔍📱.

8:30 - Blaine's call for identity verification on social platforms 🛂.

8:50 - The urgent need to amend Section 230 and regulate social media 📜.

10:00 - The importance of safety in gay dating: Always inform someone about your whereabouts 📍.

10:23 - Delving into the horrific crimes of Jeffrey Dahmer 🚫.

12:12 - Adam's unnerving experience with Grindr encounters 🚪.

13:45 - Blaine's ghosting tale from the past and a debate on dating etiquette 📆💔.

16:41 - Blaine's progressive viewpoint in response to Ryan 💡.

19:00 - Adam's near encounter with a mysterious Grindr user from afar 👥.

25:50 - Blaine's exhilarating yet alarming escapades in Montreal 🌃.

27:40 - Ryan's blackout experience in LA 🍹.

29:30 - Ryan's unexpected night with a surprising individual 🛏️.

31:30 - A shoutout to our lesbian allies 🌈❤️.

33:00 - A plea for justice: Remembering the men of Lady Bird Lake 👨🌊.

34:00 - Comment to win! Stand a chance to receive a "Coffee with Gays" mug ☕🎉

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

This bachelor adds the gay bars. They really pissed me off.

Speaker 2: 0:03

You freaking. Open your mouth and Prada comes out, don't?

Speaker 3: 0:07

come between Bargain Bradley and my mate.

Speaker 2: 0:14

And welcome to another podcast with Coffee with Gays. I am Adam, we have Ryan and today's host, we have Blaine. What are we talking about, blaine?

Speaker 1: 0:26

Today we're talking about scared gays, because I think that there's a lot of actually really scary stories around the gay community and one that actually just hit my TikTok feed yesterday about a guy named Jonathan Honey.

Speaker 4: 0:43

Yet another person's body was pulled from Ladybird Lake this weekend. 33-year-old Jonathan Honey was reported missing March 31. And his body was found in the lake Saturday night. This comes a few weeks after 30-year-old Jason John was also found in the lake after a night out.

Speaker 1: 0:59

There are guys that have been going missing in Austin and Chicago and Florida lately and there's been talks of if there's a serial killer or not.

Speaker 2: 1:08

Well, Austin's not that far from us. I know, that's a little edgy.

Speaker 3: 1:13

And I'm going to Chicago this week.

Speaker 1: 1:16

And you're going to Chicago. Market days is coming up. You should be very careful. I don't want to be a conspiracy theorist, for sure, but I'm sorry. This Austin thing is really, really weird.

Speaker 3: 1:27

Yeah, because I'm already got nervous about the Friday night one. It sounds like we're going to the sketchy neighborhood.

Speaker 1: 1:33

Yeah, then definitely be very careful. I did make Ryan reshare his location with me, so I do have that now. So but yeah, jonathan Honey was like a 33-year-old, like really attractive, fit guy. He was down on Rainey Street. We were there for our photo shoot and it is the gay neighborhood.

Speaker 2: 1:49

Rainey Street is downtown.

Speaker 1: 1:52

Downtown Austin. If you're familiar, it's where all the bars are. There are gay bars, but also not gay bars too. He was there for a bachelor party and I'm like a little unclear if he's gay or not. He looked gay but he does have that fish picture that they've been showing. But he's an attractive guy.

Speaker 2: 2:09

I've just been fishing. What are you talking?

Speaker 1: 2:11

about he could be like you. For sure he could be like a straight looking gay dude.

Speaker 2: 2:17

So for anybody who has never been to Austin, there is the, I guess the river.

Speaker 1: 2:22

It's a river and they call it Lady Bird Lake, but it's basically like a river.

Speaker 2: 2:25

It's a river that runs through Austin. That I would say is a lower part of Austin. It kind of divides the city, but divides from the lower to the upper and most of the city is in the upper part of the city.

Speaker 1: 2:37

So this guy, like basically, was on Rainey Street. He went to go get food. He had been drinking.

Speaker 2: 2:43

Well, he was out with the bachelor party.

Speaker 1: 2:46

He goes to get food by himself and he wanders to Lady Bird Lake, which is like 1.8 miles away it's not like a short walk and he somehow just goes into the lake and drowns. And what kills me is this isn't the first one. There's actually nine of these deaths that have happened to men in their 30s since December of 2022.

Speaker 2: 3:13

You would think this should happen to people in their 80s when they have an outside, even if you're drunk.

Speaker 1: 3:19

It's like you're not just wandering around and like, oh, like I just ran into a lake and I'm dead, so the toxicology came out, and I'm going to stitch the video from the local ABC affiliate that actually the reporter that I follow that stitched that was on TikTok that it just angered me so much because at the very end of his video he goes oh and so now the police are doing new safety measures, adding lighting and adding fencing to Lady Bird Lake to stop that.

Speaker 5: 3:47

The autopsy has just been released for 33-year-old Jonathan Honey, who was found dead in Lady Bird Lake here in Austin, texas. Let's talk about the details For those who don't know, my name is Ford Sanders. I am a news reporter for the ABC News affiliate here in Austin, texas, kvu News.

Speaker 5: 4:01

So back in April, just a couple months ago, 33-year-old Jonathan Honey his body was actually found in Lady Bird Lake. He was here visiting from the DC area on a bachelor trip. He was reported missing on March 31st and the Austin Police Department says that he was drinking and went off to go find food. And a day later they found the 33-year-old dead in the lake near the Rainy Street District. So when it comes to the actual autopsy, it ruled Honey's death as an accidental drowning, but it said he had alcohol in his system. It said he had amphetamines in his system, which was in the line with his medical diagnosis of having ADHD, but also hydroxyzine, which is usually a good anti-anxiety medication. But Jason John, back in February, was also found in the lake and it was also classified as an accidental drowning, still leaving a lot of questions for family and friends of all of these victims and more work to be done on those trails for safety measures and precaution.

Speaker 4: 4:46

Some Austinites and city leaders have been demanding improvements to the Rainy Street area, including better lighting and adding cameras.

Speaker 1: 4:53

And I don't think it's a safety issue. And there was this guy and I'm just gonna add a little fuel to this fire because there was a content creator, his name's Ken Wags, this dude who I think I kind of showed you and you're like is he gay or not? He's not gay because he had a girlfriend at one point and he came out and he had this whole conspiracy theory about serial killers in Chicago and then he went to the Austin Killers and he basically was like saying that these killers were out and it was. It was wild when he was claiming and he was also saying that these private investigators were visiting and he was showing business cards. He got canceled big time because he was like also saying that his app was going to help find them. So he was tying it to business.

Speaker 2: 5:39

Why would the police? Were the police upset about that or not?

Speaker 1: 5:43

So the police were like no, we don't need your help. And then he said that police were also working with him. So everybody thinks he's super shady and he was doing it for a following. So he basically hasn't been posting on TikTok anymore and then started doing other stuff on Instagram and he said hey, I'm not doing this anymore. But I will say this is weird. Like, can we just admit? This is weird? And the guy Jonathan that died at Lady Bird Lake and they just released these toxicology results he had anti-anxiety medicine in his system which he wasn't prescribed and like, we're still ruling this as an accidental drowning and it's not a homicide. And yet it's the ninth guy that's gone missing. So there's another guy actually in Florida, an older man who has been missing from a gay bar called Cruisers. He's an older gentleman actually.

Speaker 2: 6:36

This is awesome.

Speaker 1: 6:37

No, this one's in Florida, another place I go to. They keep like popping up and I think, you know, maybe it's just social media and that's kind of what our topic is today, which is why I wanted to bring it up. But like, we have to be like really careful because there's a lot of scary situations and we need to be really aware.

Speaker 2: 6:55

But you have to also remember, for a lot of people who are that may be listening, that's not gay, is. There are apps out there, such as Grinder, and the best thing that I ever said, that I ever heard, was Grinder should have been named Fruit by the Foot, because Grinder actually puts you in location by feet away from somebody. So, in turn of this, if I had Grinder on right now and Blaine did, we would be probably three or four feet from and it would show you in the app how far away you are. So the scary part about this is you have a lot of people who can find you, your location, where you are and, trust me, I've done it. I have hunted down some people in my life, but not to kill them, but just to be like I think you're not out of the clock and I think you're lying about who you are and I'm going to find you.

Speaker 3: 7:50

No, I mean it's crazy to think because we put a lot of like trust in that, like we're going on this app agreeing to share our locations, the other guy's locations Also. We can go, you know, hook up with someone and you never know when that person could be crazy, and then you end up getting murdered and like we've done that.

Speaker 1: 8:08

I've been told by somebody that they know where I am and it scared the shit out of me.

Speaker 2: 8:13

So Tinder doesn't do it like that. Tinder doesn't give you locations. Grinder literally puts a grid off and if you move closer to the person, you move closer to that person on the grid and it could scare you. My mother always says she's like you're going to die from a grinder.

Speaker 1: 8:28

I have to tell you, and I am sick and fucking tired of this and this is one of the reasons I love this podcast platform and I think that we should all be mad at social media companies I include Facebook, twitter, instagram and every fucking social media platform out there and these dating platforms. They should be required to ID verify everybody. I 100 is not hard to do it, you know Scruff actually is the only one that actually does it and you have to go in and you have to do a thumbs up, like with your current picture, and like different things hand gestures to show it's a current photo.

Speaker 1: 9:09

They don't make you do ID, but you know what this would do. This would stop child trafficking. This would stop like creepos like because you had your identity stolen with Grinder.

Speaker 2: 9:19

There have been people out there. So the way the grinder works is you go on there, you chat with somebody, like, hey, you want to hook up, ok, let's meet at this place. There have been people who are serial killers that would go on Grinder and they'd be like, hey, you want to come over to my place? And they would put up a fake picture of somebody really hot and somebody would get lured into it and be like, yeah, I'll come over, and the next you know they're being murdered, they're being murdered, but nobody says to usually goes hey, I'm going to go hook up with this guy, if you don't care for me, in 10 minutes I'm going to be at this place and we'll come back to this. I think we want to get further with the story, with these, with like the, the, the murders that have happened. But it's a scary thing that people need to be aware of and really think about it, because we're in a different time in the world where people are killing people like it's.

Speaker 2: 10:12

It's. It's not the same things that we used to be. What's the big murder where the guy used to lure all the gay guys in? It was just back in the Jeffrey Dahmer.

Speaker 1: 10:22

Jeffrey Dahmer, yeah, I mean, look what Jeffrey Dahmer did.

Speaker 2: 10:24

He would lure people in and bring them back to his house and then he would kill them and then he would dissolve with their body in what was the chemical.

Speaker 1: 10:35

It was Lyme.

Speaker 2: 10:36

No, it wasn't Lyme.

Speaker 1: 10:37

We need Bargain Bradley on here with his true crime stuff.

Speaker 2: 10:40

He killed like 12 people. The one who got away was the one who fucking finally got him caught with work. It's unbelievable.

Speaker 1: 10:51

It's crazy and it's, I think, scarier, fueled by these apps. Have you had any scary?

Speaker 3: 10:56

I remember, actually, the first time I did this, it was in Denver and I was really nervous because I'd had Grindr but I hadn't actually really used it up until that point and I was like you know what, screw it, this guy that I flew to Colorado with dumped me off and I put myself out there to go visit him in Colorado. I'd met him on Maid's Life Cycle and then I got there and then he's like I'm actually having feelings about my ex still. So then he drove his Colorado Springs, drove him back to Denver, and so I got a hotel. I was by myself, it was like a holiday weekend. I felt, I guess, kind of lonely, upset and, like you know, rejected.

Speaker 3: 11:37

I was like I finally put myself out there and then went, and so I was like you know what, for the first time I'm going to open Grindr and have some guy come over and came over, I mean, to the hotel and just had the door unlocked and had him come over, and thankfully it was fine. You know, I was still here, but I felt it was exhilarating, but it was also kind of terrifying. Like I have no idea who he is. He's just some guy walking down the street near the hotel and I was like, hey, you want to come over?

Speaker 2: 12:03

I've done this time and time again and I kicked myself in the ass is you don't know who's walking through that door, you don't know whose door you're walking through, and you complete yourself in a really bad situation. And I would say this I have put myself in bad situations where I've walked to a door and it's not the person who they portray.

Speaker 3: 12:23

I think about this a lot too. Like I, you know, I run out rooms in my house or I've done Airbnb and like I've got all these people coming over all the time and I just I'm like I remember the very first time I did it and it was terrifying because I was like, oh my God, I just gave the code for some stranger to come into my house and it is what it is.

Speaker 1: 12:43

Do they run ID verification for Airbnb and stuff?

Speaker 3: 12:45

As a host you can require, I think I just say that they have to have like an ID loaded into their account but it's really open, Like who can just come on in. And thankfully it's worked out well. Financially it's helped me, but there's been a couple of times it's been scary. Yeah, the meth head lesbians. And then also also the one guy that stayed for several months and I remember walking by the room. Is that our favorite straight hot guy? No, the straight hot guy is hot and fine he's. I guess that's another thing we let hotter people get. We justify it if they're hotter, right? No, but there was one. He stayed, like we kept extending it, but I remember I'd walked by his bedroom door and he'd just be sitting on the edge of the bed like staring at the wall and it would freak me out. And my mom was busy one time and she was freaked out and she was telling Chris, she's like you need to stay here with me. I am not staying in this house alone with this guy running this room.

Speaker 1: 13:40

Yeah, you never know, I think, okay, I have a really good, I have a good one, I have a good one that just came to me. So I went on a date with a guy 10 years ago okay, Maybe 12 years ago, because I left Dallas, I moved to LA and then I moved back here, right. So when I moved back to Dallas, I got on Grindr. I was talking to this cute guy and all of a sudden, like we were having a good little banter and I was like, oh, you know, like yeah, we were talking about going on a date and then all of a sudden, on my phone I get a text message and I hadn't talked, we hadn't said what our names were yet, and he goes hi, Blaine. And I was like who is it? And the name was in my phone, but I didn't have any message history. And he goes remember me? And I was like no, and he's like, yeah, I'm the one you're talking to on Grindr right now. And I was like okay, and then it was like we had been on this date.

Speaker 1: 14:47

I finally remembered we were on this date 12 years ago and what it pissed me off is it was a great date, I loved it, but then what I used to do is, after a date, I had a separate Grindr profile on my iPad and I would go on my iPad and see if the guy got on Grindr right after the date, to see if he was like trolling for other ass. I just what has he got on the Grindr? Just to see if you got on the Grindr, Great point. Okay, Toxic trait, you can call it what it is. I just wanted, look, I just wanted a guy that like had a date, that like was like didn't have to get right on Grindr again.

Speaker 2: 15:23

So I wanted to see if the guy that I had a date with got on Grindr. So I got on Grindr.

Speaker 1: 15:28

Yeah, but not on my account. I got on a different account, so anyway, I didn't ever talk to him again. I ghosted him.

Speaker 3: 15:35

Because after the date you saw him on Grindr.

Speaker 1: 15:38

Yeah, I ghosted him because I was just like, well, fuck you. If you're gonna go like, look for another guy after a great date, I don't wanna talk to you again. You're not worth my time.

Speaker 3: 15:45

I think that is a valid thing Cause he didn't put out on the date and so he was still horny and I think he got on there and he was like oh, this date ended on a great positive note.

Speaker 1: 15:55

We hugged, we had a little kiss. It was a normal, fricking, normal date, but I didn't like put out sexually and he wanted to get on Grindr.

Speaker 2: 16:03

So hold on, let me get back to this. So I'm horny and I wanna get boned. What is the problem with that?

Speaker 1: 16:09

You know what, to each their own at the time, I think what?

Speaker 2: 16:11

the problem is, is your emotions are out? I mean a lot of your own.

Speaker 1: 16:16

At the time in my life I just wanted a guy that could go on a date and have a normal date and not have to go and have sex all the time. So that's what my theory was. That was my thing. So I didn't wanna talk to the guy again. I don't wanna waste my time on a Grindr search.

Speaker 2: 16:32

How do you know that? Maybe he had another friend on Grindr?

Speaker 1: 16:37

Oh.

Speaker 3: 16:38

God, would you do that again now?

Speaker 1: 16:41

No, no, no, no. Now I'm like very much more progressive, so like I wouldn't give a shit now, but back then I just like cared. That's a great question. I've evolved since then, but hey, I'm sorry you're taking his side. This guy's a fucking creep. Because then here we are, 12 years later and he's texting me hi, blaine, blah, blah, blah. I'm talking to you on Grindr and I'm like okay, and then he's like you're the one that ghosted me 12 years ago. And then he's like I know where you are right now.

Speaker 2: 17:14

Then I would say he's a freak.

Speaker 1: 17:16

And it was the creepiest thing. And then I said you know what I'm sorry, we'll just call him C and I said you know, I really sorry about it. And then I realized what I had done and why I had done it, which I think it was justified from my perspective.

Speaker 3: 17:31

Either way, he held onto that for 12 years.

Speaker 1: 17:33

For 12 years and he was like waiting for this moment and the text just got creepier. And then, because I was so like unnerved by the situation, I agreed to go on a date with him as a makeup.

Speaker 2: 17:47

You're an idiot.

Speaker 1: 17:49

I know, I know, why would you ever do that? He said he wanted to go on a makeup date and I said, okay, I guess I owe you that. And then I kept telling my friend. I said I think I'm gonna get murdered on this date, like for real. And then I was like, maybe I'll go at the restaurant across from my apartment. But then I was like, well, then he'll know where I live, so we don't need that. And then I finally just said you know what I said nothing will make up for what I did to you 12 years ago.

Speaker 1: 18:19

So I would like to set you free. I think it's best for me to bow out and say that I hurt you, I'm sorry, and let's just not do this date, because nothing I will ever do will ever make this a relationship. And then he sent me some like weird GIF. That actually was a nasty GIF. That was basically like I'm gonna murder you, gif. And I was like you know, it was the scariest thing ever. So I was not wrong. The guy was crazy, clearly, and he wasn't the one.

Speaker 3: 18:50

Clearly he was a psycho clearly I'm just gonna lock you up in his house and keep you there, and you'll never leave playing.

Speaker 1: 18:59

You'll never leave. I've been waiting for you for 12 years to find you on the grinder. I mean, it's a scariest. That was a scary game moment. I mean, whoo girl, that was so scary. Do you have a scary game moment?

Speaker 2: 19:16

Mine was a little different, a lot different. So I do remember when I first moved to Dallas I was on Grindr and again Grindr, she was having me feet. Miles you are away from this person. So I would entertain people just to try to break them down. Not break them down, but just try to see who they really are. I'd love to hit, but I can figure out people real quick. So I got a message from this guy and he was very good looking and I'm like, oh, mine's really good looking guy from 4,200 miles in messaging. So then I would go buy the money, rent right, just want the money.

Speaker 2: 20:03

So I'll give you that, so I would go rent, fine, and I'd say, and I was like can you set a filter, like certain types of them, geographically?

Speaker 3: 20:14

Like I'll get you another one, but I'm like this age, career, about life, that, whatever, and that's how you do it.

Speaker 2: 20:21

You can, but there is nobody putting filters on looking for how many of these 1,200 miles away, that's not happening.

Speaker 1: 20:29

Yeah, they were looking for you.

Speaker 2: 20:32

Let me go get those. Thank you, Thank you, you guys are all looking good. So he basically says hey, I was looking in the DFW area. I think you're very good looking. I would like to get that. That's also a good idea. I would like to get a panel review. When I come in on Monday night and I was like it's fucking Saturday, why are you playing Monday nights? And you're 1,400 miles away from me and I'm like what the hell is going on and I was like I don't know, I thought we were in the shit, so what's?

Speaker 2: 21:07

going on through my head is this is some 90 year old man, because we get a lot of those who just wants to entertain them with our time and just wants to chit chat. So I was like whatever, so I played a lot of them. I was like sure you can play Monday night. I'll regret doing it with you.

Speaker 1: 21:25

You have a jet. If he had a jet, I'd be okay with that.

Speaker 2: 21:31

And he messaged me and said I'm in the ethereal me town. Like I came in late tonight, I can't do dinner now, but do you want to come over to my, my Hotel room and have some drinks? I'm like, mind you, he was very good looking pictures really. But I was like, and I'm one run, like I Want to see you this way. I can't like, I can't fight that, like, I want to see you. This is just to see it.

Speaker 2: 22:01

So I was like, alright, I'm gonna wind up going to a murderous house or murderers hotel room, or I'm gonna go to a 90-year-old man. It's like it's gonna be one or the other. There's this, this guy who's not gonna be, and I have a picture of him too. I'll show that. So I said to Kaylee I was like well, this is where I'm going, this is the hotel room, this is the hotel number, this is where I'm gonna be. If you don't hear from me in 30 minutes holidays, check with me first call, please. So on my way out there, he tests me and said hey, Can you grab a wine opener? Because I don't have a wine opener, but I have wine and I was like Ashley, that's a weapon.

Speaker 2: 22:44

I could jam it in your head. Yes, I would grab that one. It's absolutely. And I mean he was saying right around, right around TFW. I think was like crazy.

Speaker 1: 22:58

Okay, first of all red flag. Can we say First of all, if he was at the crescent, the Ritz Carlton, really, hotel Zaza, like these are all like green flags, right, anything that is like the Anatole, that would be another really good one. Staying at DFW airport at the Dason red flag, no private jet red flag. Okay, continue.

Speaker 2: 23:28

I go and I never forget. I wrote off fortune for the Dason and I. This is how I'm going to die.

Speaker 2: 23:37

I'm going to get murder and the disease, how, and I'll never forget, I had the court, the court part of the bottle opener Sticky out this, because I was like so go to the door. And I took a deep breath, not to the door, open the door. It was the hot guy, so it was real, this was in and Legit. I was at there, was like, oh my god, I did not think that this was you and I was like, why did you text me from 1400 miles away? And here's what he said years I'm in the military. I was in Arlington, virginia. I had to come to DFW to do a layover that I was supposed to be here for five days before going to Germany on the military flight and I was like I Thought you're gonna kill me. And he I'm telling you he was Gorgeous, I Wanted, can I tell you I had a similar moment with a guy that I was deployed to Korea.

Speaker 1: 25:00

I'm Penelope, if you don't know, penelope from SNL. I do have these moments, but no, but they're always real moments. I'm not trying to one up, but the guy was being deployed to Korea. I fell in love with them.

Speaker 1: 25:15

He had the nicest you know eggplant of anyone ever and I spent seven magical days with him before he got deployed to Korea for the rest of His career in the military. It was similar. I'm just saying I'm not trying to one up you. I just he was tall. He's taller than me, six eight, and I'm six five, but I didn't think he was a murderer and he wasn't at the days in, but I guess that explains all of those red flags. By the way, it does.

Speaker 2: 25:43

But the thing is, you gotta you really like why didn't he tell you that before?

Speaker 1: 25:50

Girl, you need to ask questions is a game. Now. Then I have another scary gay story of a stupid thing that I did dumb, dumb, dumb. I was 30 and I went to Montreal for my 30th birthday party and I, it was wild with my two best friends. I mean, we were just wild every night. I mean, that city is so much fun.

Speaker 2: 26:11

There is a gay and straight man. It is just men wanting to have sex and they had the water there.

Speaker 1: 26:17

I didn't see a gym, but god, they were just beautiful and they're all like layered up all year. I don't understand how they get so hot. Anyway, it was just magical times with many different men, anyway, but I I had had a multiple night and I just we started early. So I was like this guy. I was going over to his place at the, you know like the Olympic Park they basically built the Olympic Stadium in Montreal like way out of the city.

Speaker 1: 26:49

So I took a cab Way out of there, like 30 minutes out, and I was like whoo, this is really scary and you know it's basically a bandit, so everything's disintegrating, like all the bobsled stuff is disintegrating over there, and I'm like hum, and there's like this weird apartment complex I go into and I don't know if you guys ever saw that sex in the city episode. We're the, we're the gay. One walks in and there's all those dolls. Basically it was that there was like he was like a costume designer, so there was like headdresses and dolls on all this red chiffon and I was like Um.

Speaker 1: 27:28

Like in the middle of nowhere and I was like, and I took a cab, so I didn't know if this is like pre-ooper, and I was like I don't know how to get back. I'm really scared. I think I'm gonna get murdered here in the middle of Montreal.

Speaker 3: 27:41

I think I'll do too, because the one that, as you're telling your story and showing up and like there's all these weird dolls and stuff, made me think of another one. This was after a In LA like big gay Super Bowl party. I went up there with a friend but then, of course, we got split up and he went off and did his own thing, meanwhile my phone's dying. I went to Motherload, which, as you know, you go in and I swear you get one drink and you don't remember anything the rest of night. You're blackjack.

Speaker 1: 28:09

I have to say Motherload in Los Angeles. It's like they put some kind of drug in the booze or like ever clear and everybody I've ever known. I had a friend, I'm not kidding you. We went to Motherload after pump once and he was throthing at the mouth and we had to take him via a black SUV home. Yeah, we were. We needed something fast, girl. We couldn't wait eight minutes on an Uber X. We were like. We were like we need something, pull up and take him home because it was bad. I do. What is it about that place? You black out, everybody blacks out at Motherload.

Speaker 3: 28:43

Two drinks for me. We need a comment. Anyone that's ever been to Motherload? I would love a comment on this.

Speaker 1: 28:48

If you've been to Motherload, do you black out after two drinks, yes or no? It's a poll for sure.

Speaker 3: 28:53

After that I started going out, I had to attach him like had to attach my phone to me, like I needed everything on a leash and attached because I would just lose everything well known West Hollywood thing about Motherload and we don't know how it happens.

Speaker 3: 29:08

Anyway. So Super Bowl Party, then Motherload, and, of course, me being me, I can't just go to a Super Bowl Party normal clothes. It was when Gaga was performing, so I had to like dress up. I did a whole little eye makeup and, of course and this was a day that it was actually raining that night too, I think it was raining then but I ended up going back with I don't even know how I met him, but some guys place the most cluttered like I couldn't even get like just getting on the bed.

Speaker 3: 29:38

I felt like you had to like jump over piles of stuff. But I was so out of it. And then, because it was like Super Bowl theme or whatever, he turned into this whole like role play and he's like, yeah, you've been a bad player. And I was like, yeah, coach, like how are you gonna? I've been a bad player, how are you? It was ridiculous. And then somehow I came to my senses and all of a sudden it was like a light bulb went off and I like I felt like I was watching myself in this situation. I was like what the fuck are you doing?

Speaker 3: 30:09

And I was like Okay, bye, I have to leave. And then my phone was at like 2%. Somehow I had enough to get back down to Long Beach, but I didn't have a key into my apartment. But I didn't, yeah, but I didn't have a key to my apartment because it was with a friend that I got split up with. And so then I have to go into my next door neighbor, knocking on the door like four in the morning, like wet. I have makeup running down my face from the Gaga makeup. Can I please stay over?

Speaker 1: 30:39

It was tragic. I mean we are adventurous, we're adventurous group and I think it's. I think it's good. We're also men. So I think we like we have the benefit of that because we feel a little invincible. I actually posted a talk the other day about like I wasn't afraid when I was in, like my friend when I was in South Africa I wasn't afraid, like she was, because I think a woman in South Africa is you got to be a little more careful than a guy.

Speaker 2: 31:04

This is why lesbians are the way they are they're scared women.

Speaker 1: 31:09

I think I'd be more afraid of a lesbian, by the way, because those women can like literally don't kill you.

Speaker 1: 31:15

Like a lesbian like I was. We were just at wine walk on Thursday and I walked into the lesbian bar and I literally was like intimidated and terrified, like I was like why are we at Sue Ellen's? They stamped my hand with a giant boobs thing and I said, is that necessary? And she's like yes, and I was like Okay, I was like really lesbians, like they're actually like way more intimidating than anyone. They'll, they'll, they'll rule the world for sure. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. The lesbians are the scariest ones. For sure they stick together. Have you ever seen the South Park episode Lesbos? It's literally, yeah, it's basically like 300 the movie, but it's lesbians and it's hysterical and super true, they can rule the world for sure. We love our lesbians, but we'll throw all the parties.

Speaker 1: 32:06

But I do think, like we do get a false sense of probably like invincibility because we're like dudes, we run in packs of guys, and then I think that we think, oh, like nothing can touch us. And then, guess what? You end up face down in Lady Bird Lake with some freaking anti anxiety meds and then, because the police are the police, they say oh, it was an accidental drowning. And that is just bullshit, because they need news coverage and stuff for the police to actually do something and do something really to investigate. And they're trying, they're really trying. But then you know, the news cycle continues the cycle and then bullshit comes up and you know, people forget. And that's why I was actually kind of glad it came up in TikTok the other day with this reporter, because I was like, oh, my God, yes, this story is really important to me because we shouldn't forget about these things, and it just what had means to happen. Another guy like there's nine so far, nine mysterious nine, no no in Austin alone and they all drowned.

Speaker 1: 33:10

It's all Lady Bird Lake and they put up fitting, they've added lighting and all of these people were on rainy street, they were all drinking, and then they all just randomly walked into Lady Bird Lake to enjoy.

Speaker 3: 33:23

Do we have any like because it's been such a downer episode? Is there any like positive angle weekend?

Speaker 1: 33:29

We're all alive and we're all in kind of middle life, so we've made it halfway there. Yeah, we're more aware of our surrounding. You two have boyfriends, so you should be good. I have a potential, so maybe, like, I'll settle down eventually.

Speaker 2: 33:44

And if every anybody who comments below. If you comment, we are going to draw one person out of the comments to send you a free coffee gaze month. So if you comment below and like our, our guests, you will be entered to possibly hold a coffee or a gaze month.

Speaker 1: 34:04

Yeah, so many of them. I'm actually really excited about that, because it's just some coffee with gaze.

Speaker 3: 34:10

One free order, right, because we messed up the print, so here's love you.