Ep. 52 Mindful Fitness and Self Trust (with special guest Nick Trubee)

In this episode, I invited my former trainer, Nick Trubee PhD onto the podcast to share his unconventional perspective on mindful movement and developing self-trust with ourselves and our bodies.  Learn how focusing on the joy of moving your body, rather than obsessing over goals and outcomes, can lead to improved physical and emotional well-being. Nick's unique philosophy emphasizes staying in the moment, cultivating a brain-body connection, and finding fluidity and enjoyment in every step of your fitness journey.

I think you're going to love this episode because Nick truly lives and breathes what he teaches and it goes against the normal status quo (which, you know I am a big fan of:)

In this episode we discuss:

• The pressure most of us feel to constantly achieve more
• How Nick's approach challenges conventional paradigms 
• Embracing everyday activities and celebrating small milestones 
• Breaking old patterns, the psychological impact of goal-oriented pressure, and the importance of consistent, enjoyable practices over rigid objectives.

If you would like to learn more about Nick, you can connect with him on his website here (https://trubeehealth.com)  or on his Instagram here (https://www.instagram.com/dr.nicktrubee).

Compassionate financial mentor and guide to female entrepreneurs so that they have peace of mind and fun with their money in order to live life now and in the future.

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As always, thanks for listening.

From my soul to yours.
Erin

Transcript

Erin Gray: 0:00

You're listening to Generate a Life Well-Lived podcast. I'm your friend and confidant, erin Gray. I'm a former certified financial planner, turned human design, financial mentor and guide to entrepreneurs. I believe our money and our business can only thrive at the level of our emotional wellbeing. I empower entrepreneurs to feel confident with their money and in their business so that they can have fun now and in the future. On this podcast, we will explore all things money, business and self-development, including human design. I hope you enjoy the journey where I share everything that I know and am continuing to learn along the way, as I honor my heart's desires while inspiring and encouraging you to do the same. Hey, hey, my friends, how are we today? I've got we were talking about before the podcast. I'm like Nick, how do you want me to introduce you? He's like however you want to, I'm like you're really my non-traditional workout buddy is what you are.

Erin Gray: 0:53

That could mean all kinds of things, but yeah, but I guess through your you want to tell everybody, like through your training or kind of, what you do, how you help clients, and then we'll dive into some questions.

Nick Trubee: 1:03

Sure, yeah, I mean my training is kind of what you'd expect A lot of experience with strength coaching and personal training, phd in exercise physiology, a lot of research in the cardiovascular health realm paired with fitness. But really the last six years branched away from the traditional and have been helping people in kind of what you mentioned the non, the away from the textbook version of that, I think, just because I've seen so much of what that on the inside looks like and I think a lot of that is just glitz and glamor. In reality it doesn't get you really very far when you want to actually help people. So a lot of it just comes down to developing relationships and understanding a person and then from there you've peeled enough of the onion in a way to see where you can actually help them. So it's been pretty cool six years. I'm very thankful for it. Yeah.

Erin Gray: 1:58

Thanks for being here. I wanted him to come on because working out, whatever you want to call it, like working out in my body doesn't create that. I don't want to say negative emotion, but that lower vibration emotion. Right, like, working out to me is a fun thing. I know some people want to use the word movement, but like however you want to, whatever feels good in your body to use, but like how often I think, as business owners, that's like one of the first things to go when we feel stressed or when we feel busy and air quoting. For those of you listening, you know, like that that's one of the things that we, some of us, want to tend to put on the back burner and how I have seen it I think I used to subscribe to that and also how much doing that really impacts all of it right Physical, emotional all of our wellbeing impacts all of it right Physical, emotional, all of our wellbeing. So, um, I wrote. I wrote some questions down so here we go.

Erin Gray: 2:52

Um, so most people look at working out movement from a like get to an end approach versus I think you and I feel very differently. Nick has helped me with some surfing stuff. He's helped me train for a sprint triathlon, and I think you and I feel very differently. Nick has helped me with some surfing stuff, he's helped me train for a sprint triathlon, and I think that when we worked together it was very much of like enjoying the journey, enjoying like what can our bodies do, versus I want to get to this place and so tell us about kind of your thought process there, cause I do think you are the non-traditional coach workout buddy.

Nick Trubee: 3:26

Yeah, I think we've all been so conditioned to have some kind of a start date and an end date. It's either pre-season, middle of the season, post-season, off season, right, that's all you're taught and most of the schooling is this is how you're supposed to train an athlete, right? It's always a start and a stop. Or the last 10 years. It's like you know so many different races to get into, like I want to run my first marathon, I want to do a triathlon or whatever, right, it's like by this program start date, end date. And I think we've all you know, at least for a month.

Nick Trubee: 3:59

From my experience, I've done so many things that have had this huge lead up and build up to this end point. And then you get there and you're at such a loss for what you just did because what you've been sold or what you imagined was going to happen doesn't necessarily align with the reality of it. So I kind of took that and spun it into the world of movement, because I find that the older I get, the more I just love being in tune with the connection of brain and body and none of that has any kind of start or end. It's just kind of all in this fluid flow kind of experience Right.

Erin Gray: 4:37

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 4:38

And I think the start and end takes all of that capacity to get there. I feel like it removes it because you're so worried about what you're doing in the moment and how you're going to get there and in reality you never get there because you're so worried about getting there. This space is not achievable or attainable anymore. So I think that can be said for a million things, especially for the high achieving person. That's in any arena. You know. I think once you get to that almost elite place where it's not about the end result, I could care less about the end result. It's going to happen regardless. I'm just going to be in the moment when I can be right. Yeah, I think a lot of it is.

Erin Gray: 5:20

I mean you said brain and body, but I think a lot of it is. I mean, you said brain and body, but I think a lot of times, a lot of us are in our brains, right, and we are imagining what it's going to be like, what it's, you know, going to feel like versus. That gets to occur right now if we are present, if we are focused on like, like you said, like. The end result will happen. If we focus on like, why are we even, why are we even moving to, to begin with, versus? I want to get here, and so this is the action I have to take in order to get there right, yeah, and I think I've.

Nick Trubee: 6:01

You know, at least from what I've hoped to do and what I've always tried to do with everybody I've worked with is and this freaks some people out at the start because they're like, well, how much should I be lifting? What's the number? And I'm like I couldn't tell you how much I've lifted the past two years, like today it doesn't matter. Or today it doesn't matter, right, I've got this. I've envisioned how hard I want to be challenged today and I match that with whatever the weight is right. And I think when you get to that point, you really access your true capacity that day, because every day is going to be different, right, some days we feel amazing, you can throw weight on the bar all day long and you can do it. Other days, you just get crushed by it. Um, so I really have honed in on.

Nick Trubee: 6:52

I asked the question to myself and I really have people to consider this as to be, in the main, staple of their movement. Is like I do I feel better after than I did before I started? Is like, do I feel better after than I did before I started? And if that's the central theme and if that's what you chase, then you're likely going to succeed almost every time, even though you failed through the entire thing. Right, like you work to the point where, like you push yourself where it feels really good, right, and you quote unquote failed, but in the end you win. And in that twisted web of how we want to think about that, you're proving to yourself that these challenges and these quote unquote failures lead you to the spot you want to be, and you can do that every day, which is like where else can you do that every day and have really no negative outcome from it? I don't know. I haven't been able to find it yet.

Erin Gray: 7:46

So I love this so much because it's really a tapping in and tuning into your body and, like you said, like a lot of traditional people that help you. What do you want to call it? Workout, lose weight, get stronger, get fit. All the things is all about like has felt right, about you're saying, about the numbers and about like very ego based right, like what is it that I, how much can I lift, or what is my running, or all of that.

Erin Gray: 8:21

Versus the like in your body today. Tapping in and tuning in and like what are you feeling? Because you're exactly right. Like there are days where I'm like I don't even know, but I'm just gonna go because I know I always feel better when I go right and I move. Versus it's almost like you're I don't like the word self-sabotaging, but like when you're so, when you're so attached to the numbers and you wake up and you don't feel like that you can be, you know that you can lift or you can do that amount of weight, then you're already like in your head, already finding the reasons, versus just enjoying and going and experiencing the, the movements, for the joy of the movement, you know.

Nick Trubee: 9:06

Yeah, I think that's the definition of self-sabotage. You start that conversation and we all know where it ends right?

Erin Gray: 9:14

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 9:14

And you really just want to employ the behavior in reality. I think that's the main goal is how can I just get that first foot in front of the other one? That's the hardest part of the workout every time. No matter how fit you become, that that's the hardest part of the workout every time. No matter how all fit you become, that's always the hardest part of the workout. Um, and I think that, yeah, that that creates the opposite behavior that we're hoping to create. Right, and I only reason I'm I practice this way is because I've I've burnt the other side so far to the end that I know where it ends.

Nick Trubee: 9:50

Um, and sure, it sounds cool in the moment because, oh, man, I'm achieving all these milestones. Like, I put on five more pounds on the bar than last week, right, I, I kicked off five seconds from my 400 meter interval that I was doing in this workout. Man, I'm getting so much faster, right. But then it's like a never ending moving goalpost. Like, yeah, can I get this much faster? Like, there is the law of diminishing returns. We all know this exists, we're all human. And then that becomes the focus of like, why can't I get better? I'm working this hard, I'm working harder than I should be working, not seeing the result because I'm so focused on the result.

Nick Trubee: 10:27

Um, I've had a lot of people I don't do a whole lot of weight loss people but I've had people that come to me that have tried everything else, can't lose weight. And I'm like what if we just don't ever talk about it? Yes, that's not part of your goal. And then, all of a sudden, six months from now, they lost 50 pounds. I'm like I think you put so much pressure on your nervous system to lose weight. It freaks out and it holds on to every little piece that it can.

Erin Gray: 10:52

Right yeah, this is I wrote down like, who is the person right Like, instead of, instead of thinking about, like how much am I going to lift or running faster? I would love if you would share a little bit also about your story, too, cause I don't know if we've ever really talked about that, but like, who is the person that, like, loves themselves enough to like everyday movement is important to them? Who is the person like that is something that, like, I always ask myself of. Like who's the person that values? Right, like, being able to like when my kids, like come jump on the trampoline with me, I get to go do that and I don't even have to think twice about that. Right, like. And I think, like you're saying, like, we can do this with movement and working out, we can do this as business, we can do this with money. We can do this in every area of our life. Right, where we're constantly so focused on the result that the whole like we're missing all of the goodness right in the middle.

Erin Gray: 11:48

You know you really are.

Nick Trubee: 11:49

I think this so aligns with your last five years, four years of like, when you focused on the result that hard. You missed out on all the fun. Yeah, but in the moment, like those tedious that your brain almost sees it as these tedious little stepping stones to get to the result, but in reality that you've coached of like I don't know if it's a wiring in our brain or like there is that.

Erin Gray: 12:30

Like I noticed myself slipping back into that last week and the and the reason why I caught it, it was because how in tune I am with my body and I was like, oh, this does the I've been here before this does not feel good. And I think that once you have come on the other side and you know what fun and joy and calm and connectedness feels like on a consistent basis, when you do go back there Cause I think it's just kind of I don't want to say natural or will happen, but I think like that's just kind of at least for me, it's like been part of it, right when I do go back there, I catch it so much faster Cause I'm like, oh, we're back in old patterns again, versus no, we do things cause it's fun and it feels good and that's kind of our North star, right, versus I think when you're in that space of in your body, when it doesn't feel good on a consistent basis, you don't that contrast to be like, oh, it actually can feel like this, you know yeah, yeah.

Nick Trubee: 13:28

That pattern is so much comfort in that pattern. Your body always seeks that comfort when in reality you know the result. That comfort is just a disguise for misery. The unknown is where all the fun happens, but man, you can't predict it.

Erin Gray: 13:42

Yeah, which is why you're scared, which is why you got to be so fit, because you can't predict it. Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 13:44

Which is why you gotta be, which is why you gotta be so fit Cause then you don't have to predict it because you can just do it Right. That's part of it. That's part of it.

Erin Gray: 13:54

Tell us a little bit about cause. I want to know you you mentioned this before and I think you've like posted this sometimes on Instagram and stuff but like, what has your journey been? Because I think that there are people that listen, that are like easy for you to say you do this all day, every day, right Like and I.

Erin Gray: 14:12

One of the things on the podcast that I want always people to come back to is, like all human, we're all human. We all go through this, no matter what our air quotes, specialty is, you know, or what we do day in and day out still shows up for us, you know air quotes.

Nick Trubee: 14:25

Specialty is, you know, or what we do day in and day out still shows up for us, you know? Yeah, I think it's a. You know it's easy to project that for sure, um, but I can tell anybody that's listening, like sure, my job, my career, my, my gifts and my calling is to help people gain access to their bodies again. Right, and they might look at me and be like, oh he, just, it's easy for him to work out.

Nick Trubee: 14:50

He has all the time in the world to do it like, for I can give you an example of my yesterday. I've got three little kids. I kind of get the call to move my body. However, they're all I, they're all three with me.

Nick Trubee: 14:58

So I think I changed, uh, two diapers, three outfits, because they were playing in like water, like squirt guns and sprinklers and stuff at least two snacks, right, that's what my workout looked like. So it's not like I have this amazing, like all the songs are playing and like purely focused and like no distractions, like no, that's pretty much how my every workout looks, because all my kids stay home except for one when he's in school because he's in first grade. But I couldn't tell you the last time I had this nice serene, like no distractions workout and I'm so thankful for that because I get that connection time with them and they get to see that like this is just a normal thing of what people do. Oh, they lift things, they smile and they're in a good mood and we dance and they we get to play while we're doing it, like all this cool stuff built in, right.

Erin Gray: 15:50

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 15:51

Um, that is like, that's pretty special. Um, not that I wouldn't like a calm, quiet workout every now and then, but it's just. Um, this is just where I am. Um, but I think I've already forgotten the question you just asked me.

Erin Gray: 16:04

No, just like your story. And I want to add to this because there was a point in time when Grayson was little like that and and in the beginning I would get frustrated Cause I was like, can't I just?

Nick Trubee: 16:14

have a. I got so frustrated. You want to right. You want to be able to be my time. That was my time. I dare you to approach on my time, yep.

Erin Gray: 16:22

And then and I think that's just a form of resistance right. And then you get to realize you're like you know what, this is my new way of living, right, like. I think sometimes we want to go back to like oh well, that's my time, when you didn't have little ones and you did get to have all of that right Versus. Now it's like this is the new air quotes normal for you, right In air quotes normal for you, right In this season of life? And how are we going to like? We can either use it as like I never get time on myself, and that's not why I don't get to work out or you know what the kids like? I agree with you.

Erin Gray: 16:55

Like Grayson just thought everyone had a home gym because that's just what her parents did, right. And so the the I think the the best way we can teach our children is by being the people right that we are trying to teach them how to be, you know. So the question for you was you know when? Because you did go through a period of like. It wasn't about the journey, it was about like okay, I want to lift heavier, I want to. And you were talking to earlier about like, how you really had to kind of transform that in terms to be. You know who you are now.

Nick Trubee: 17:33

Yeah, I think you know, early on, in whatever kind of trajectory you have envisioned for yourself, those mile markers and achievements, they kind of open your eyes to what that environment looks like, Right. So it's like me as a runner. When I started, I never, I mean, I played team sports and I played, uh, uh, I was, you know, college golfer, Um, and then when I graduated I wanted to be like you know, I worked out every day. It was just part of what I did, Um, but I wanted to like I want to be competitive still, Like, I'm still in that competitive age. So I was like, well, let's, I'm fit, I'm not very big. Like um, you know, I understand my uh lineage. I'm like I could probably run pretty good, Right. So I was like I'm going to run a marathon, whatever. So it's like all right.

Nick Trubee: 18:27

So I picked out a conservative plan, followed it to a T, never missed anything, Right, it's just what we do. Ran the race. I was like that's not bad, this is pretty good. I ran like a 345 or something like that. Open my whole world to like what you need to do to get faster. So each year I kind of threw in like the next level of like. This is what I need to do to prioritize, to get faster. It's always like next.

Nick Trubee: 18:50

Yeah, that's what you have to do. It's like you've got to follow the guidelines, You've got to follow all the whatever, all the programs, and then you know, get a little faster. And then, six years from there, I qualify for Boston run, Boston set my PR Right. So I'm bidding and celebrate that Cause. I'm like, oh, I got to beat that next year.

Erin Gray: 19:12

Good, classic, overachiever, good job.

Nick Trubee: 19:15

Never even once celebrated that like amazing experience that I had. Like all this went like the stars aligned for that race. It was so good I think back on it now and have much more appreciation for it. Um, and then the next two years following that, the wheels just fall off hard because I pushed it beyond all the warning signs, because my training plan said I had to do this.

Erin Gray: 19:36

What was your body telling you and what was it showing you and that you were ignoring?

Nick Trubee: 19:39

Oh man, so many things, um inability to focus, bowel issues, exhaustion, um, like irritability, all that kind of stuff, right, um, and were you?

Erin Gray: 19:55

just so damn determined like you're, like this is what I have to do.

Nick Trubee: 19:59

Never check in with your body, never once yeah, I mean I've said some pretty cool like for me I ran a four 55 mile.

Erin Gray: 20:07

Never thought like I don't even know if that's good.

Nick Trubee: 20:11

A real runner, that's like that's a warmup. Like the guy I ran with that he paced me to that he could run a four. He ran a four, oh three. Like that's just like a job for him, right. But for a person that like wants to run, that's like's freaking fast, right. It's a damn near sprint the entire time. Um, and then I think I ran a half marathon at like a 119, so just under it was like a 550 something mile, and sitting on these really cool landmarks and then just like madly, no you push your body.

Nick Trubee: 20:38

Tell you what ultimately yeah, um, I signed up for one last marathon after I was like, should I even be doing this? And I had to stop, like all my long runs. I could only run like five miles at a time before I had to go use the bathroom. So I had to like plan my runs around my house so I could go sit on the toilet for 10 minutes, right, like this isn't normal. Right then I got to the point where I despised even running, like it finally took like a two by four to my head to say, like, maybe there's something else that you can approach this by right, a little different strategy, never. And then I looked at my a picture from a race and I was a freaking skeleton. Never, never looked at myself like that before.

Erin Gray: 21:23

I was like this isn't good.

Nick Trubee: 21:25

So, um, that's when I started to say, like well, I've I followed to a tee all these things that I've told I should have done, and now I've woken up to where it really the end point of that looks like. So what if I like totally flip it upside down and didn't follow any of that stuff?

Erin Gray: 21:44

Was it scary for you at first?

Erin Gray: 21:46

Because I think that's a lot like we're talking about the unknown right, like talk a little bit about that because I think for a lot of people us included right, it's scary in the beginning because we, even though the we have the evidence that it air quotes work that way, even though we didn't feel very well, you know, our bodies were shouting at us. But like we, we do have evidence that, like, we got to that place versus yeah, like you say, like flipping it upside down and going into the unknown and trusting right, like really trusting unknown and trusting right, Like really trusting, that's what the trust, the T word, that's the big one, because think of everything you've ever done to where you are now.

Nick Trubee: 22:25

For anybody listening, there was probably either a goal attached to it or some kind of ending right, what if you just as an experiment? What if you don't right? And for me, I think it was maybe a little scary to think about it, but what I think I realized the most was there was no more pressure on yourself anymore.

Erin Gray: 22:45

Yes.

Nick Trubee: 22:46

And I got so used to that pressure just competing in, you know, when I was a college division, one college golfer like you're getting paid to be there right, Like it's a very competitive environment and I carried that over for the next 10 years and I didn't realize how much that pressure had built for so long.

Erin Gray: 23:01

Yep.

Nick Trubee: 23:01

Now it's like, oh, I can just like do this for fun and the result doesn't matter anymore, Like whoa right, that really opened up my eyes to exploring it further. I think was that just literally. I could hear the teapot releasing all the pressure. Um, and then I think, once you get to that point where and it's hard, it's even hard for me to say this now because I know it's gonna people aren't gonna believe it, but it's like what? What if they're? You don't have to worry about a result like why, why the result?

Erin Gray: 23:36

I can just hear the brains going. They're exploding right now.

Nick Trubee: 23:40

You don't have to focus on a result.

Erin Gray: 23:42

Because we've been so conditioned, right Like we've been so conditioned in society to have a result. What are you working for what? Like goal, goal, goal, goal, goal. I'm rereading the illusion of money for I don't know how many a bajillion times, and he was talking about the same thing. He was talking about like goal versus like. What is your intention? Intention is, you know, like you say, I want to have more fun, I want to have more patience. You know, I want to have whatever it is versus goal of like.

Erin Gray: 24:09

I want to be at this weight, I want to lift this much, I want to and the expansiveness that happens when you let go of the bowl and you really just set the intention.

Nick Trubee: 24:21

Yeah, I think there has to be like. There has to be a result Like there, there, there, there will be a product there will be a risk, exactly Right Like there will be a result. I'm not saying there shouldn't be one, because there will be one. However, when you remove the pressure from the result, you'll realize that some of the result that you hope to achieve, you're setting the bar real low for yourself, because how could you predict what you're actually capable of achieving?

Erin Gray: 24:49

yeah right.

Nick Trubee: 24:50

So what I found is like you know, but I think it really all goes back to trust, because you still have to have enough trust in yourself that you can achieve that and and you're worthy of achieving that and you're capable of achieving that Right, and then the result take care of it, takes care of itself.

Nick Trubee: 25:09

Right, it's not like, oh, you know I'm going to, I don't have enough. Cause. This is where a lot of people fumble is like they don't have the trust that if they don't work out tomorrow they're never going to get back on the horse and keep working out. Right, if they skip a day. I don't have the trust in myself that I can get back and can make that part of my day Right. It's too easy to skip the next one, the next one, the next one, you know which, sure, like, call it for what it is right, bring it out in the open Like we need to hear it. You don't trust yourself and that's okay.

Erin Gray: 25:38

Yeah, right, we've all been there.

Nick Trubee: 25:40

I've been there. But until you truly do believe in yourself that you can do it and you trust yourself enough, then you realize that all of that can be fun. Every part of the process can be fun.

Erin Gray: 25:53

The word that came to mind, too, is the compassion part. Right, because when you have compassion for yourself and you one, you recognize right, like, okay, the way that I've built everything up until this point has been by being hard on myself, has been by forcing myself to do things. Here we go back to trust, right, we, we don't know we can do it, we don't trust ourselves that we can do it from that compassionate, fun, joyful place. And, like Nick says, of like, what if it was an experiment? What if it was? Like let's just see what happens versus the pressure and I also wrote down, like you said this earlier is that like and maybe not in these exact words, but like our body's feedback, like we're used to pressure, like our bodies and the actual chemicals that are coursing through our veins are used to. If we are from that pressured place, we, we feed on that, um, and so our bodies are like hey, hey, wait a minute, haven't? We haven't been here lately. We need to have some more of that, right.

Nick Trubee: 26:56

Yeah, it's a dopamine response for you know, because you get that immediate satisfaction of I achieved it.

Erin Gray: 27:02

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 27:02

That's the chemical loop of like. You know that was a good thing. Let's get some more of it, regardless of the process that got you there.

Erin Gray: 27:09

Yeah. So what would you say to people that are like, okay, this all sounds really great and also because like the consistency, like I think that can be a word sometimes that people are like I'm not consistent, so what are your thoughts around consistency and like what that actually looks like, feels like all that?

Nick Trubee: 27:29

I love that, yeah. So a big part for me early on, even now, is I kind of go back to what I loved when I was like full-time scientist, academia type thing was like I love the experiment. It's like you, you know what's been done before you look into it, like wouldn't it be cool if I put this together and see what happens? That sounds really fun to me, right? No pressure, just using my brain figuring stuff out. Let's see what happens, right. And then if you apply that to like getting your body moving, then it's like you create a system for yourself of like let's create that little experiment every day. Let's ease into this whole thing that workout looks like. Because as soon as most people hear workout, it's like they're sitting and they're comfortable that where workout comes up and their brain envisions the most challenging, most typical part of that workout, doesn't see anything else, just sees like the death part right doesn't see like the foam rolling and the breathing and the and the moving around those are so great.

Erin Gray: 28:34

Let's make sure we design those for you. Those are some of my favorite yeah.

Nick Trubee: 28:38

So it's like you need, like some kind of a system that leaves breadcrumbs for your brain to like. Ease up the reins and say, oh this is what workout is today?

Nick Trubee: 28:46

that's cool. What's the next? What's the next piece? What's the next piece? Before you know it. Then you're into the big part, but it's now.

Nick Trubee: 28:53

It's like enjoyable, because you're prepared. Your brain is like actually unlocked your body to say, okay, let's do this. So I treat every day like that and that, once I get moving and do these simple, easy things that make me feel better. The days where, like I noticed feeling better, I'm like, oh, this is going to be a good day, let's see what I made up today. The days where it's like doesn't feel that great, but I can probably still keep moving, and then you just work with what you've got that day. You know, don't you know, live to see another day. But what you did do is you employed the behavior that you really desire to do. You trusted yourself enough to start it. You did it enough to feel better. And now you're like, wow, this is great. What can I do the rest of the day? And then the days where you the stars align, you hit it hard and you get way more fit, right, you're resetting the expectation of what you're capable of, like what your body is truly meant to do every day.

Erin Gray: 29:47

Yeah, and I think the thing that we also don't talk enough about, like working out, moving, whatever however you want to call it is like the mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, like the whole entire effects that that helps and creates. And by doing that, you know like I always in, like you're saying. You know, sometimes in the morning I also used to think like I have to work out in the morning, so like sometimes I just want a slow morning, but I love going outside in the middle of the day and working out. You know, like just like listening to your body and also knowing that I always feel better once I do it Right, like when the mind's like but it's this and that's like yeah, but when I get done, I'm always like thank you so much you know.

Nick Trubee: 30:34

Yeah, yeah. Think of how much bandwidth your brain wastes when you have that conversation going back and forth Like should I do it? Yes, you should, I don't want to. It's on your mind the entire day. So you've just used up how much of your brain power when you're trying to get X, y and Z done for work or your career or whatever right.

Erin Gray: 30:55

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 30:56

Whereas if sometimes, if you just say I'm willing to be uncomfortable for these three or five minutes to get started in my movement and workout, give me 30 minutes to move my body, Then I can tell you from experience. Once I'm in that frame of mind, I can get six hours of work done in two hours and it's going to look really good. It's going to look way better than did If I'm living with that internal turmoil.

Erin Gray: 31:18

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 31:19

Of that dialogue of like back and forth, because your focus is never where it needs to be. It's half there and it's half in front of you, right?

Erin Gray: 31:25

Yeah, yeah, it's just like where our energy is split Right, like it's just that, that I call it like a ping pong or tug of war is what it feels like. Right Versus, like, okay, I'm not doing it this morning because I want to have a slow, but lunchtime I'm going out there and the decisions just made and I'm going to just like you said, just I'm going out there, I'm going to see how I feel and I'm going to do a couple of things and then I'm going to get into it.

Nick Trubee: 31:50

Even if you stop after a couple of things. Are you okay saying that is my workout for today? Oh, that's a good one You're going to have to recondition yourself, because sometimes that is your workout for today and that was more than enough. But if you've been conditioned to think it's got to be 45 minutes, I've got to be sweating and I got to be able to not move then you're going to have a rude awakening.

Erin Gray: 32:08

Yeah, I think a lot of people do Right.

Erin Gray: 32:10

I think here we go back to like yeah what we envision it to be, versus, okay, that was and you said this like worthy and deserving, but like it's enough, right, it's enough of how you want to move your body for the day, versus what it has to look like.

Erin Gray: 32:29

You said one other oh, when we were training together because part of the sprint triathlon was for me to run, and I was like, let me just see if I like running, for me to run, and I was like, let me just see if I like running, and one of the things that I don't know if I was surprised about, but I think a lot of us think and you talked about this a little bit of like we think we're going to start something and we're going to go from like zero to 100 and versus, you know, zero to one was like running for a minute, walking for two and letting that be enough. And here we go back to like releasing the pressure of like, okay, I don't have to figure out how to run 30 minutes straight in the next X amount of weeks.

Nick Trubee: 33:12

Yeah.

Erin Gray: 33:14

And allow it, like I think I guess it just goes back to so much of conditioning right that we have been taught, like how we're supposed to train or what it's supposed to look like, and being compassionate with our bodies. Like if you haven't ran in years or you don't enjoy running first of all, I don't know what your thoughts are on that but like if you don't enjoy running, why are you running, right?

Nick Trubee: 33:36

Like talk about running even more by trying to run non-stop for 30 minutes.

Nick Trubee: 33:43

Well, I, I think I got an appreciation for when I uh hung around some really top tier runners and their coaches and in that world of running, they really don't try and increase their overall volume by more than 10% in a week. So you're like, okay, I'm thinking like you know, they're running like a hundred miles a week or whatever. So I'm like, well, they can't go more than 10 miles and you're really doing that to just try and level out the nervous system and try and reduce the impact for injury. Right, that's kind of there's like no real science behind it beyond like 8 million years of coaching and training. So there's, I trust, that a lot right, um, that's probably what I look at, more than what the paper is going to tell me, because that's a nice controlled environment and running is anything but that. Um, so I'm like, okay, if I'm talking to a person that wants to get back into running, if they run zero miles and I increase it by 10 percent, then we're only talking about like, well, let's say, they run three miles a week.

Erin Gray: 34:43

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 34:45

Let's say they run three. Or let's say you run 10 miles a week and I increase it by 10%, that's only adding one extra mile for the week.

Erin Gray: 34:51

Yep.

Nick Trubee: 34:52

So if they run zero, then why should we think running for 30 minutes consecutively is going to be a good idea?

Erin Gray: 34:58

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 34:58

Right. So I'm like well, what if we break it down into like sizable little pieces of like this is what this running feels like, but it's not so long to where, like, my brain goes into fight or flight and I hate every piece of it. No, like, I get to run for a little bit, feel the feels stop. Oh, this feels pretty good. This is nice. They get to walk a little bit and by the time you feel good again, you run for a little bit and you're just.

Nick Trubee: 35:22

you're basically trying to trick your brain because it's really good at telling you you suck all the time, right yeah, but anytime you can back go in the back door when your brain is patrolling the front door all the time, then that is what I've tried to maximize in everything that I do from now on.

Erin Gray: 35:39

Tell us a little bit about cause. You've talked about nervous system, but like break it down for us a little bit to understand. When you say the fight or flight and I mean we talk about this from you know I've had other people on that talk about the you know I call it survival response, right, but like how does that actually show up for us when we are actually trying to work out?

Nick Trubee: 35:58

Great question, yeah, so just a basic, almost anatomy part is you know, thinking central nervous system is your brain and spinal cord Some would argue the eyes, since they're directly connected to the brain and then your peripheral nervous system is all of the sensors, all the connections with your muscles, all the stuff that picks up information from your environment, Right, so it's all kind of think of it as like a big computer, almost. Well, it's. You can break that down into two parts. One is meant for fight or flight, right, the sympathetic part of that nervous system, and it's hardwired to win. Almost.

Nick Trubee: 36:31

When we get, like, our heart rates above 100 beats per minute, we flip into sympathetic nervous system. Everything has to be revved up, like, for our bodies to move, heart needs to beat faster, it needs to pump with more. What's called contractility needs to beat with more vigor, right, that nervous system has to be there for those things to take place. We've got to exchange more gases out in the periphery, so things need to be moving faster, right? So that's our sympathetic nervous system. Well, if you get so used to that, then, just like anything else, your body is so efficient in that once you do something a lot, it gets really good at seeing that a lot.

Erin Gray: 37:08

And.

Nick Trubee: 37:08

I get really good at doing something I do all the time right.

Nick Trubee: 37:11

So if you're always in like next deadline, got to get this done by 8 PM, got to finish this paper, got to send the checks out, right, you're always revving up in the background that part of the nervous system so you can't get out of it. Your body likes it now, so you feed it Right To where you try and sit down and chill. You're like't feel. Right, this is stupid, I'm not accomplishing anything. Yeah, right, because the other side of that is let's breathe, let's use our stomachs to breathe, don't use your, don't use your shoulders to breathe, don't use your pecs, don't use your neck right. Use your stomach, use your diaphragm right, be bored like hear the birds talking.

Erin Gray: 37:52

This is why Nick is my workout buddy, because this is what I say all the time Be bored, yeah.

Nick Trubee: 37:59

But you have to enter, for me, I have to enter the workout with that being the dominant force, cause once it's flipped, then nothing that you do will ever be good enough, cause it's not. You know, we're not like, we're not jazzing here, right.

Erin Gray: 38:12

We're like it's in and up in here yeah, so then you can.

Nick Trubee: 38:17

At that point you're moving slow enough to make the connection with your body that you're desiring, right, and then, once you kind of get moving, then you can rev things up. But you're still in control. Right, you started from a place of control.

Erin Gray: 38:33

So because a lot of people right I think you were maybe we're here at one point.

Nick Trubee: 38:38

I for sure, was here at one point.

Erin Gray: 38:41

So how do we come to our workouts? I'm joking, but like Zen light right, Like cause. If you've been going all day, if that is your natural state that you operate in on a consistent basis, how do you flip the switch to get to work out? Or if you're waking up in the morning and your brain's already like 90 miles an hour, what are some of the things that you, that you suggest or that people can play with to try to get into that state first, to then be able to work out?

Nick Trubee: 39:10

That's a great question.

Nick Trubee: 39:11

Um, I think it's going to be different for everybody.

Nick Trubee: 39:13

Some tools that have helped me are, like we were talking before we started this conversation was like what if I you know, obviously treating it like an experiment, cause you never know what you're going to be able to do that day but, like, what if I just entered that space of like this is pretty cool, that I can move my body right now.

Nick Trubee: 39:31

Right, like, coming out of, like a grateful gratitude which people probably don't want to hear, gratitude because I think it gets overplayed a lot and in different arenas. But if you truly are grateful for like, being able to like connect with your body and move it and all the cool stuff that it can do. Because, for my, what I envision is I know all of like the actual physiology that's taking place just for you to like engage one tiny part of your body, like literally, a hundred things happen in like one, one thousandth of a second. For you to do that like I don't even it's, it's unbelievable that you know once you dive into it. So, like and that happens all the time for me, like, yeah without asking or thinking about it right, like that is like the creator did some pretty cool stuff for us, right?

Nick Trubee: 40:15

So when you start to approach it from that and it's like, oh, things start to like level down a little bit for you, and then one thing I always employ and this is just an easy cheat mechanism that anybody can do and there's not a part, maybe not even any research on this is I do soft tissue like foam rolling, stick rolling, all that kind of stuff. Most of the research on that is for, like, acute changes you get directly after mobility, right.

Erin Gray: 40:38

That's for most.

Nick Trubee: 40:39

However, what you're doing in the moment is you're retuning the nervous system because you are lengthening the muscle fibers each time you roll on there, right? So it's sending a signal back of like how much tension am I holding here in my body? Right, it sends the information back to your brain and spinal cord. It sends it back okay, let's make an adjustment. So every time you do that, you find all these really tight places where your body's holding on this tension. You send information back your brain's like why this is stupid? Like chill, why are you holding so much tension here? Sends that message back to you.

Nick Trubee: 41:13

So you're like you're refining all these areas that are holding up the pent-up, sympathetic, tight energy, right, and you reduce some of that. So the foam roller for me is like an easy cheat mechanism of like let's find these tight places, let's see how stupid this is, let's chill out. And then I start gradually moving with my more enhanced range of motion, I'm breathing better and all of a sudden, like you're not worried about anything anymore, you're just like this is really cool, I can keep moving, I can challenge myself now, but it's not from a point of like Disgust and have to yeah, it's a place of experimentation and like, wow, look what I'm capable of doing today.

Erin Gray: 41:53

What I love about the foam rolling too, when you had me start doing that, is because it's a way to start working out without having to start. You don't just go to the gym, you know what I mean, but it's like that gradual of like one, it feels good, for sure it feels good. Two, it's a way to like okay, you're already kind of in the process of moving your body, but very slowly, versus okay, I'm going to work out now Let me just go start jumping rope, or whatever it is, you know versus like okay, so that that gradual and it just like, like you said, it feels good.

Erin Gray: 42:22

And then all of the science behind it and the magic that happens when you're doing that, you know.

Nick Trubee: 42:27

Yeah, and then you, just early on, you set the intention of like that feels good, but it can feel even better, like does you just kind of keep that? Like that's the theme, that's the undertone of your whole workout. I was like that felt good, it was hard. I pushed myself, like felt pretty good, right, and I think you can take that forever with no end point.

Erin Gray: 42:46

And you just said, like what feels good, what can feel even better, is like we we literally have to flip the switch on, depending on what your relationship has been like with exercise and movement, of like allowing it to feel good. I don't know if we said this in the podcast or I was thinking of it or we were talked about it, you know, before we got on. But like how much of organized sports, like there's times at Grayson's gymnastics or you know things that I've heard her at tumbling, you know where they're like almost as a punishment, like oh, you're going to do X amount of you know pushups or you're going to. So we've used we've used movement as a way to punish ourselves versus pleasure and fun and enjoyment and, yeah, expansion. I don't know, I'm just like let me move my shoulders back.

Nick Trubee: 43:33

Exactly, yeah, yeah, I think I think we do a lot of disservice in competitive youth sports right now. I think it's all geared from my experience from the parents, from an egotistical standpoint, right, I think most of them are at that point where we're starting to realize that, but it's hard to jump off the train, where we're starting to realize that, but it's hard to jump off the train, um, but I think I grew up in kind of the the era on the hedge of getting into that, but I was gifted a lot of opportunity without any kind of formal, structured, um, intense kind of someone always looking over my shoulder yeah right, it was like. It was just like, hey, pick this club up and just try and hit the ball, yeah right, and nobody gave me any pointers and I think that was done very specifically from my, my dad, my grandfather, of like let's just see what he can do with his own body and if he does it enough, let's you know, and you know. Then you get to the point where it's like they might toss in a little something, but it was never in the form of like you know, you got to do this or this is what you need to do to get better, whatever it's like, why don't you just try that, see what happens?

Nick Trubee: 44:46

You know, yeah, um, without any of the pressure or any of the you know punishment, reward, none of that complex it's just like just see what happens, man, just try it. You know. Now it's just like you got to have it's right back to our conversation started. This milestone has got to be reached at eight and you got to do X number of this by 10. And it's just like and we're seeing that most of the kids now have no fundamentals. They can do all the big shots but, like you know, you can't win with big shots all the time. You're going to miss a lot of the big shots. We know that.

Erin Gray: 45:22

And you're taking, you're taking the fun out of it. I don't remember what documentary it was that I watched, but I think it was like, um, they interviewed what they called the greats you know like, and when Gritsky was on there and he's like I can't tell you how many times that I get parents to come up to me and be like, tell my kid to you know like what you did and he was like, when I was your kid's age, I was playing basketball in my backyard.

Nick Trubee: 45:39

That's what I was doing.

Erin Gray: 45:40

He's like I didn't even pick up a hockey stick. I don't even think it was until he was like in high school. He's like I was doing all kinds of sports. You know, because we I think a lot of parents are like that right, like they're. It's almost like the how the moms used to be like with the weddings right, we want to relive our, our, our daughter's wedding. You know, through us it's like that's that's what it's become with sports, versus like let's just go have fun, like that is the point of life, that is the point of all of it. Right, right is like to have fun and let's just see what happens. Um, and then you don't have, you don't have the pressure when you're just doing it for the hell of it and let's see what we can do.

Nick Trubee: 46:20

Kind, of thing I know I think you you ingrain so many lessons of like you don't. If you, if there's an end mark, you aim exactly for that end point yeah but you're you. You're capable of so much more than that end point. Right, it's like I talk. I have a group chat with two guys. We talk every week. One I had on my podcast, um, his name is steven burkett, retired marine, has four guinness book of world records in the kettlebell swing and like heaviest, like heaviest, heaviest, swinging like it's like the most amount, the most amount of weight swung in an hour wow, okay but the most amount of weight swung in a minute, the most with a certain weight max, unbroken, without stopping.

Nick Trubee: 47:09

He swung like a 70 pound kettlebell like 1680 times without stopping right crazy. But what he's found in all this training and stuff is like if I think I can do 500, I will stop at 500 yeah yep, if, like, your brain gets so used to this like number, like oh, that's a good number, it it hates five, oh seven.

Erin Gray: 47:33

Yeah, yeah.

Nick Trubee: 47:35

It's not this amazingly round number Like right. So it's like he picked up on that in his train, Like you take yourself to these numbers but you stop there. But that was only 60% of what you had that day, Right yeah.

Erin Gray: 47:47

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 47:48

So it's like you know, you pick up on little stuff like that and I think that's where most of our especially with like youth sports now it's like we have these set points. But, like number one, my kid could probably do more than that had he just had more diversification of movement in general and less pressure. So I've had, I've had a lot of conversation with my oldest. He's only seven but all his friends are like hardcore travel baseball. You know, coach pitch already this and then like man, I want to play baseball. I'm like that's cool, but like we can play in the yard I'll play with anytime you want to play right. It's like I want to play this and that I'm like let's, let's do it, let's play it right now. But I I know the environment and I know people working in that environment. They're like don't get your kid in this league, do not do it, you know. So I fought pretty hard to. He's tried a lot of different sports and he's just done it for fun and we haven't pressured him except for goodness sakes.

Erin Gray: 48:42

I know that's. That's the thing it's like. It's starting earlier and earlier, like I always said, like we're not doing any of that select stuff or any of that stuff because we're going to play, and that is the whole point of all of the sports is to play.

Nick Trubee: 48:56

And that's it. I think if you're you're good, somebody will find you. If you're that good and you will be, cause you're not in the mill of all the other kids, you will have more opportunities.

Erin Gray: 49:06

Yeah.

Nick Trubee: 49:06

Yeah.

Erin Gray: 49:07

Yeah, totally. Anything else you want to add or comment on that? We maybe didn't touch on that you.

Nick Trubee: 49:15

This has been fun, this has been a good one. But yeah, I think this is a theme, like anybody that's listening that really wants to, you know, see what they're capable of, not only a movement, but like, maybe it's your business, maybe it's making money, maybe it's whatever, maybe it's your family or time. You know, let whatever you can do, but you know, still try and do it every day. Right, create that part of your routine movement. But like, let it be enough some days. Like, even if you think you can do more, stop.

Erin Gray: 49:51

That's the work. That's the effort. Right, that really is the effort for a lot, do more stop. That's the work. That's the effort. Right, that really is the effort for a lot of us right. It's like um, because you're going to do it tomorrow, right. Yep.

Nick Trubee: 50:04

Yep yeah, I always say like protecting the asset right Like you're protecting the asset because you're building.

Nick Trubee: 50:08

You're building the business. I had a really successful business guy worked with them. Like we're talking like 100 million dollar plus guy, yeah and um, I'm like, okay, how long did it take you to build that up before you sold your business for 25 million? He's like 27 years. I was like so we're gonna accomplish the same thing in six months. Like, if that's your expectation, I will send you to someone else that can help you do that. But like, if you really want to do this, to where this becomes your life and you become that person that you ultimately want to be, like, think of, like the things you did. Like did you build that entire business in 27th?

Nick Trubee: 50:50

like no okay did you do a little bit one day and a lot of it the other day? Yes, why can't we take that same approach? Yeah, why can't 10 minutes of workout be cool on Monday? Cause it's gotta be 60 minutes, like right. Yeah, yeah.

Erin Gray: 51:09

I think that's, I think that's really wise. And also like coming back to like trusting your body, trusting yourself, you know, like really tuning out all of the noise, all of what you've ever learned about working out, moving your body, what it should and should not be, doing, um, all of it, and like what feels good for my body in this moment and do that could be 10 minutes, could be five minutes, could be an hour.

Erin Gray: 51:37

Yep, whatever it is, that was enough yep, yeah, oh, thanks, nick where can people find you learn more about you all the things yeah, trubyhealthcom, or at drnicktruby on instagram. I'll put it all in the show notes. Thank you, my friend.

Erin Gray: 51:54

And thank you for everybody that's listening. I appreciate it. Thank you for tuning in today. I appreciate you spending your time with me. I created Grow, the CEO cohort for the entrepreneur that wants to be in a community with other heart-based entrepreneurs. It's a place where we blend the 3d of money, like understanding your bookkeeping and taxes and investing and how it applies to your business, along with the 5d of money, like the energetics and the emotions that you feel with money. To learn more about growthy CEO cohort, you can head over to my website at generate a life well-livedcom and, as always, from my soul to yours.