Taylor Swift's Boyfriend's Least Important Teammate Goes To College

In this episode, Chesko and Regan discuss the “diabolical lies” told by Dr. Elizabeth Butker’s son to the 2024 graduating class of Benedictine College.

Alternative episode titles: “Small Kick Energy” and, my personal favorite, “The Smallest Kicker That Ever Lived.”

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Transcript

0:00

Hello everyone and welcome back to the Mr. Pick Me and the Man Hater podcast. I am the man hater. And I'm Mr. Pick Me. Yeah you are. Obviously these were terms lovingly given to us by a troll on the internet because I don't hate men. And I really want to be picked. No, I already was picked. Sorry. The truth shall be revealed. I mean, both are true. I mean, it's true. I do like for other things, like for, we're doing sports teams. Don't pick me last. I got picked last so much. I'm a big guy. So they'd think the first time they were going around, they'd be like, I want the big guy and I would, I get picked. And then they'd realize I'm very uncoordinated. You're like, no. So it looked on paper, it looked like I'd be a good asset, but the kids quickly learn kids get it so I Speaking of like pick me in sports actual pick me I remember in high school like we would do like soccer or football and I remember I was like one of the only girls Yeah, they would pick first and that they would pass to I remember the time like, Oh my God, I am like really good at sports. Wow. Instead of like, these dudes probably want to sleep with me. Right. They're doing something weird. There's something, this is their way of showing. I was like, they really picked me for my athleticism that I know I don't have. So what? Like, it was just like, there's so much sexism that went on that like, at a young age, I did not acknowledge. Like, I should have been thinking like, damn, these boys will literally not choose women, even though the women are faster. Like, there's so many girls. I am sorry. So good at sports It's weird because I don't consider myself good. I don't ever score any points Actually, I could throw a football back in the day and I can run. Okay, okay fast, but I had so many friends that were like stupid Like stupid, strong, fast, like one of my best friends, um, I'm still friends with her, but we were like besties back in the day. And she, uh, she would beat the boys in the presidential fitness test. She could do more pull ups. And it was always a thing. Cause she'd just, she'd just be crushing, crushing it. And the boys, you could see the boys sweating. They're like, I can't lose to a girl! Like, I will Oh man, out. I had my, uh, I had asthma, so I got to just walk all those things, but it was great. I had asthma, they never, they're just like, you might die. No, I got to walk the mile, I, like, they, I had a whole separate, they told me, Alright, you just have to walk the mile in, like, less than 12 minutes. I'm like, alright. I guess I would just mess around. And yeah, I did find out, I found out the one sport I was pretty good at was, uh, soccer, but as a defender, cause I was so much bigger than everyone, especially high school soccer. Get through me. They called me the wall because people were just so terrified of cause I would just, I would, and I never did anything illegal, but I was so much bigger than I would just run into people going through the ball and inch. How much, how tall are you again? Uh, I, I was saying bigger. I wasn't saying taller, but I think it was applied to the wall. I am six foot five. Okay, cool. Cool. Cool. I'm glad we brought that up for the millionth time. The wall also implies a lot of mass behind it. I'm not the ladder, right? And so that would be a rough nickname. The ladder. You're like the ladder. I don't, I don't even know that word. Do you know what my sister called me for the longest time? Because, so, I was like a short person, and then there was a time in my life where just my legs grew. So like, the torso says, and I just had like these long ass legs, and my arms were long. Do you know what she would call me all the time? I don't. The awkward gazelle. Oh, no. A newborn deer, you know, that was kind of the vibe. I feel like I've evened out a little bit because my torso's short. Um, I'm 5'5 just for the record, which is Exactly like average height. I don't think I've ever seen you above your, like right now. This is, this is the most height I've ever seen you. I have no idea how tall you are, what you look like. 5'5 I'm 5'5 and a half. We've known each other for a year. We talk weekly and I have no idea what you look like. Well, we've never seen each other standing. Yeah, I could be lying this entire time. I might be 5'4 I thought you were short, to be honest with you, because of the way you shoot yourself or you film yourself. Film! Yeah. Because you do like a low angle in your head. Right. So you gave up. But I, I just remember you were talking, like, as if I knew your height. You're like, oh yeah, somebody left short King Energy, and then you like laughed. I was like, so what is that? How tall are you? You're like 6'5 I was like. I think also though, men really want you to be short. So they're just like short king. I guess I wouldn't say king. I don't know short beta. I don't know Yeah, beta white knight didn't be mcsimperson Simperson I wish I wish wait. Oh, man. I don't know if I have the screenshot Somebody said a great one the other day son of a bitch just go, you know We do that. I need to start. Oh, this is a different way. I Can't stand with a fat dude white knight energy. You constantly give up I was like, first off, Fat Dude White Knight is an awesome nickname. I love it. I love it. I love it. Uh, that's a, I can't find the one, but anyways, it was, someone was, it was, it was literally like, it was like Captain Cook or like, the great Simpy McSimper Sinners. It was, there's, there's so many, they get creative and I enjoy them. We love that. I think that's the problem though, is you enjoy it and they don't like that. Wait, because it's they're saying something that if it was said to them, it would genuinely hurt because they're extremely insecure about what other men think about everything. Uh, yeah, I think that's like when someone insults me, I think it's almost more telling about them because it shows me what they think an insult is. So, anywho, theme song. No, wait, we didn't talk about what we're doing here. Wait! Calm down, Chesco. Holy hell. I like our theme song. I know. It's very good. So, this week, we are reviewing a video that I have been tagged in so relentlessly, Chesco. I have been dodging it like spoilers back in the Game of Thrones days. You know, where you're like, don't tell me! Uh, and I have not watched it because I wanted my real reaction for today. So do you want to describe the video and then we'll do the theme song and then we'll talk. Well, the kicker of the Kansas city chiefs was asked to come in and give the keynote speech at a graduation ceremony for a Catholic college. And okay. Why? It's a long speech. Did he go there? No, just because they think that I'm assuming they were like, this is the guy we want to represent us because also Before I go into the speech, this is somebody said oh, they must have felt really like terrible hearing this guy Say what we're gonna go over. No, no, it's posted on their official college YouTube page the full 20 minute So they're like, yes, this represents. So nobody feel bad about this. This, they felt this represents what they believe. And he, after giving this whole, there's like, like transphobia, like, I didn't think there's all this other weird, random things. He throws in like that are, that are like placed throughout it before leading up to this, this, the ending of his speech where he went, decides to address the women that are graduating. From this college. No, please don't. Okay. That's what we're going to go over today. So what you're saying is he's going to give us some really bad advice. Yes. If I was a person in the audience. A woman in the audience. This is, this is the worst advice I'd want to hear that day. Honestly, the amount of tagging, I'm genuinely terrified as to what this man had to say. Yeah. I don't think I've ever had a video, both DM to me and tagged as much as this one. Yes. So it's okay. So the entire speech is this long lead up and it leads to this moment, which is the climax of his speech. Although it's a Catholic college, should I call it a climax? I don't know if that's Ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment. You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you. Okay, so up to that point, you could be like, yes. This is, he is, he's going to speak out against the systemic injustice of all these things that women have been told to them in there. Cause these diabolical lies that these women have been told to them. Like, if I said those lines, what would you, you, you would imagine that I'd be talking about some systemic issues that have oppressed women that stopped them from getting to that point for their college graduation, right? This is a big deal. A woman is graduating college. This is a huge achievement. You assume you're going to be saying something empowering to her because she's already gone against the odds in some way, you know, um, but there's something about his beard to me. The bushiness of the beard matched with his hair that makes me feel that, you know, women's rights aren't on the forefront of his mind. Show them the picture through the podcast. Okay, here's the thing. I mean, I hate to be beardist, but, um, I've known a lot of dudes with this beard and they were not about women usually. Like there, there are certain times you can see something and just be like, you're right though. That is a very specific type of beard. I'm telling you. It's like burly man, except it's really, really tailored. So you're like, that's what I'm saying. It's too well, like there's a difference within a burly beard versus the ultra well kept burly beard. Yeah. Just giving vibes. It's a designer burly. Yes. It's like not really burly. Okay, there we go, but he wants people to think he's burly and the sides like straight it's like that Yeah, how many of you are sitting here now about to cross this stage? And are thinking about all the promotions and titles you are going to get in your career So yeah, go on to lead successful careers in the world But I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited About your marriage and the Children you will bring into this world. I can tell you that my beautiful wife, Isabel, would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife. And as a Whoa! I'm laughing because I'm uncomfortable. Were people booing? There was definitely a loud noise. Hold on, hold on, let's play that again. I can tell you that my beautiful wife, Isabel, would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation As a wife and as a mother. Okay. Wait, hold on. I think it's a baby crying and good for that baby. That baby knows what's up. The baby's the only one that spoke out. The baby's like, what the hell? This is a graduation. Come on. That's my mom. You're talking about. My mom is up there. She already has it. Um, so they've just achieved their college graduate's degree. And he's telling them the best you'll ever do is be a mom and a wife. I know what you're all thinking is, thank God I'm done with this degree. Now I can get to my real work of getting married and pushing out babies. Caveat is always, there's nothing wrong with someone wanting that. Sure. It's the scene and this moment in time of, of putting that at the forefront of saying, I know what you, all you women in the audience are thinking right now is thank God. Now I can go get married and have, that's on the, that's all you clearly must be thinking about. As you were forced into getting these degrees, I'm so I'm not stunned as in like surprise, but I'm stunned as in like, what the fuck? Why would like, why is how? Because basically he's saying like, I know you've just dedicated like what, assuming four years to getting this degree, but basically you're not going to use it and it doesn't mean anything. So it's like, if that were true, why would these women be here? Why would they have worked so hard? And it almost feels like Because of the fact, because at first when I'm watching this, I'm like, Oh my God, can you imagine you ask this NFL kicker to come speak at your college? And he says this, Oh God. But the fact, like I said, that they posted this on their website and they, they probably pre approved this script ahead of time means that they were like, it almost feels like this is the college. Making sure that the women that they are forced to allow to attend know their place. Well, I mean, I 100 percent agree. It is know your place because, you know, any gender that's there has worked incredibly hard to get there, has made the grades, has. you know, done enough to graduate. So, you know, I'm sure many of them excelled and the idea that both, you know, men and women, I don't know if there's any other genders there. I would doubt they would be open if it's like a Catholic school, probably not open at a Catholic. Yeah, definitely not. So we'll speak with a binary just for this, this little conversation, but it's like, so the men and the women would have worked equally hard. This is their big moment. They're both excited. And he says, Uh, but not you, honey. Uh, but ladies that's enough. I know you're excited about promotions and big salaries, but let's Let's check that. Come on. Let's put your ego aside here and remember what your real vocation, your true vocation in life is supposed to be. You're not going to do with the boys. You're doing great. Go out and succeed women. Let's be real about what your actual purpose is. Like just to, it's so like degrading and like, well clearly sexist, but it's also like they have this huge accomplishment and he's basically saying, But none of this shit matters for you. This may be your big day, but it's not that big because this isn't even your real Vocation. The ways in which they try to make women feel small, even, like, this is their graduation, like, even in their biggest event, even in their moments of celebration, they, he could not help himself, but take the chance to make women feel smaller, to make women feel less than, and again, like, it completely takes away from the four years. He's basically saying, like, okay, well, that doesn't really matter. Like, congrats, but like, that's not actually important. Only the men. It's only important for the men. Only the men get to work. Only the men get to use the degree that you both equally worked as hard for. What? The thing is, too, like, whenever, whenever, uh, I critique stuff like this online, I'll get a bunch of people like, Why are you bashing my religion? Uh, and it's, I, I, I'm bashing misogyny. Yeah. I don't believe, I don't believe religion and misogyny have to be the same thing. No. Because of the fact that teaching is so ingrained in many churches, I'm not going to say all because there are, there are more progressive churches that have moved away from these sort of things. Yeah. Uh, they assume that, Oh, I must be anti theist. I must be against all religion and I'm against, and I'm not like, I, I make it a point not to bash. Cause I, I, I respect other belief systems. You're allowed to believe what you want. But once that belief system is, is, is it, includes, or if part of that includes oppressing women or oppressing anybody, oppressing sexuality, oppressing all these other people that you can harm, then yeah, I think it's worthy of critique. And I don't think that's critiquing the religion. I think that's critiquing something that people have put into the religion. Makes you feel like your religion is being attacked. Then there may be something wrong with your practice and it's something to think about like you should not have to be degraded and put down and made to feel less than in order to practice your beliefs and even and people think people think this is like a That's an old way. It was, that's what it used to be, but even in, even in like really subtle way or not even subtle ways in your face ways, uh, when I was in Catholic, I went to Catholic school for part of my childhood and when I was an altar boy, uh, the, the girls, my eighth grade year was the first year that girls were allowed to be altar girls, uh, were allowed to be servers and, and that, You know, that's, it's not like that was that long. And it was this big deal. The, the church decreed it was allowed. And, and I lived in the Bay area of California, one of the more progressive areas. And we, the church I went to was a more progressive church because they allowed it immediately once it was allowed. So, That wasn't that long ago, which is wild to think about. I had somebody, um, again, why do I not save the names of people? Uh, but I saw something come up online and they were like, Can you imagine a world in which we would say to men, Hey, you know what? You can go to this church, but mm-Hmm. God is a woman. God is only a woman. God will only be referred to as a woman. And in creation, you were made of a woman and you created the sin. Okay? Now you can. Now you can come to this church, but only women are allowed to be the heads of the church. Only women are allowed to speak at the church. You know, women are the heads of all important groups within the church. They are the only ones that can do any of the sacred rights. But you can attend, um, and you really should be subservient to your wife at all times, like, can you think of how many men would be like, yeah, okay. Yeah, that's unacceptable. Right? That would be unheard of, that would be called a cult. Mm hmm. That feminist something, like, and I hadn't really thought of that. I mean, I, I mean, you think of these things, right? Like, but when it was presented that way, I was like, Oh my God, that would never happen. No, that would never. And it's so, there's so many religions that are built that way. Um, And it's just seen as the way it is. Right. And it's just, it's just kind, it's kind of crazy and, and, you know, again, it's, it's the idea of it could never go the other way. Mm hmm. Like this speech would never go the other way. It would never be a woman talking to men like, hey man, really cute that you got your degrees. Love that for you. Now go home and be dads. There's a creator on threads that her entire thing is that she will respond to, uh, to like these misogynistic guys doing exactly what you're saying though, where she's like, Oh, well, you know, men get a little emotional sometimes and it's brilliant. I'm going to find it. Well, at some point, yeah, we're gonna, we're gonna, I want to talk about it because it's, it is, she's so good. I've seen that approach a lot. Okay, let's finish him this out. Yeah, let's go. I'm on the stage today and able to be the man I am because I have a woman who leans into her location. I'm beyond blessed with the many talents God has given me, but it cannot be overstated that all of my success is made possible because a girl I met in band class back in middle school would convert to the faith. Become my wife and embrace one of the most important titles of all, homemaker. Oh man, did you hear him get choked up? Yeah, I can't even look at you right now because I'm like, I'm in awe. That is so brutal. And again, there's nothing wrong with being a homemaker. That's not the point. Yeah, my wife is right now. She is a stay at home mom. That's what she does. She's making the home. Yeah, she is making the home. I home, well, I have like part time work, but I, I make the home sometimes, um, but it's the idea that like, even in a man's appreciation of a woman through this lens, it is an appreciation of her assisting him in being great, her assisting him and achieving all his hopes, goals, and dreams that are completely separate. From his role as a father. They are separate dreams. He is allowed to have both. He gets to be the NFL kicker. Or is it NFL? He's on a chiefs. I'm going to talk about that in a second, but yeah, we'll get to that. But it's like, you are the support role. You exist to allow the man to shine and thrive. And it's so bizarre to me because it's like, like in my relationship, for example, like my wife. Uh, carried, and then had our daughter, which, holy shit, oh my god, uh, miracles, miracles, it's fine. Um, and then, you know, I stayed at home, but I do my freelance work, obviously, I do podcasts and, uh, whatever. But we both, you know, we both agreed upon who was gonna stay home and when, like, And we both agreed upon how we were going to do or do our life so that we both are achieving our goals. We both feel driven. We both feel our vocation, as he said, you know, where, you know, our purpose. And it's so interesting to me that like in this, like the dynamic that this type of relationship sets up is that as soon as, well, I guess as soon as you get your, your college degree, according to this man, um, everything shifts. And your identity is almost gone and you are wife and mother or pursuing wife and mother while the man is Pursuing husband, but he's still pursuing his goals. He's still pursuing the job he wants Um, I would assume you know, he would have a degree in one thing. He'd be doing sports as well Those are two different things, right? So there's multiple things that a man is allowed to do that that don't define him necessarily, right? These are, he's able to be multifaceted while the woman is like, no, your wife and mom. Can I say how spot on you are about the idea that he believes that women give up their identity? Let me read you this other quote. Oh no, help me. No, no, Jessica, no. So this, this is from earlier in the speech. He said, as my teammate's girlfriend says, Familiarity breeds contempt. Do you know what that quote is from? It's a quote from the song Bejeweled by Taylor Swift. What is, what is it, what, what, in reference to what was he talking about? I don't, it's, it's, who care? It's, it's, like, the thing is, I, and I don't mean to, I don't mean to downplay. It's, the, the, I, you know, I should have looked it up. Sorry, I didn't mean who cares in a sense of, I don't care about what you're, uh, Shut up! I mean in a sense that, Where's your vocation? Yeah, I just can't believe he, like, he literally downplayed Taylor Swift. Oh, he's, oh my God. Oh my God. I'm just getting what you're saying. Taylor Swift is the friend's girlfriend. Yeah. His, his teammate is Travis Kelsey. I was thinking someone was quoting a Taylor Swift lyric. His, his teammate is Travis Kelsey. Oh my God. That's so much worse. Oh yeah. So he quotes Taylor Swift by not saying her name and instead saying my teammates girlfriend. Literally erasing her identity and on, and that was a purposeful choice. Yeah, of course. Yeah. And in this speech where the main, the climax is him telling women that they should not have jobs, he's quoting one of the most famous working women on earth. And only referring to her as my teammates, girlfriend. Um, okay. Sorry, that was a, that was a lot to throw at you right in the middle of your sentence. There's so much there. Um, I think anytime, and we see this a lot in just like everyday life, uh, where men will refuse to like use women's names and will only refer to them as somebody's girlfriend, which again, showcases who's important here. Who's the important part of the story? And again, he's, he's pulling away like of all of her achievements that she has, which are just irrefutable, like it's just undeniable, right? He is saying, but the most important part of Taylor Swift as that she's. Travis Kelsey's girlfriend. Just the fact that people still argue who's more famous, like, if you leave the United States, they do not know who Travis Kelsey is, period, point blank. That's it. That's it. Any other country. You go, who's Travis Kelsey? They'll say, I don't know who that is. To be clear too, I imagine Travis Kelsey would not be happy with this speech. Uh, from what I could tell, he's actually a very, very progressive as far as, on the surface. And his brother. Yeah. Yeah. They, they appear to be, They're vocal about it. They have at least said the right things. Yes. Which is, that's, which is more than we can say for, say for this man. I am dumbstruck. I literally thought you were talking about, like, somebody's girlfriend was quoting Taylor Swift. No, no, no. It's so deceptive and gross. Like, speaking of diabolical, I don't think the diabolical lie is, In saying like women should have careers if they want to pursue that if that's what their goals are women should have equal rights and equal opportunity to pursue their goals, which again, like you should, you should be excited about having a career and making money and having success. Despite in this economy that like almost no families. We have moms that aren't working as well. Anywho, the diabolical lie is that this man is weeping, acting like he, he values his wife so much. He cares about her so much when her only role is really in facilitating his lifestyle. She takes care of the home while he's the kicker, you know, she takes care of the kids That that is who she is like to act like that is an appreciation of her That is a diabolical lie to tell women That is your true vocation. That is a diabolical lie. Particularly these are women who are making it clear. I want to do more unless they're, I remember in high school, there was a joke about getting your MRS degree, which is like trying to meet men, but I think. More often than not, particularly now with how expensive colleges are, right? People aren't going to college to meet men, you know, simply to meet. Yeah. Yeah. To meet their husbands. I think the Southern just came out right there, their husbands. Uh, they're going to further their education. They're going to further their careers. So to use that as the time to say those things to them, to squash them, like, To take away this very important moment from them to remind them like hey Remember your place because that's what he's saying Your place is in the home. I don't care about your degree That is your and like even using the term vocation makes it again, it gives it this, uh, almost like like a spiritual or like biblical importance, you know, and makes it seem as though to not, right. Cause it's always, when someone says these things, they're also implying if you don't do the thing, what it means, um, by saying it's your vocation, you are going against God, essentially. Right. You're going against God. That is the underlying theme, right? It's the idea that, so for any of you women, just remember if you choose to not do your true vocation. Right. Because that's the clear difference between our stance and what this guy is saying is we have both said that we value someone having the choice to do what they want. Both are valid and beautiful choices. What he is saying is if you choose to go against your true vocation here of supporting your man. And being the homemaker, then you were listening. You have fell for the diabolical lie, right? You, you are basically living in sin. You are doing a diss service to, to all women. Everywhere by making them think that you can find happiness outside of a man. How dare you, how have you and your wife done it? I know we're so happy, like dang our vocations. Um, yeah, it's, it just makes me really sad because I have found, and I think we've talked about this before, but that the men who say shit like this. put women in really bad positions where they have incredibly high expectations of them. They expect them to be martyrs. They expect them to, you know, sacrifice themselves in pursuit of their vocation of mother, right? That they should bear the burden, that they, you know, they're the rock of the family. And again, all of those are great things. But not when your partner could and should be helping you. Right. And I know women who grew up in this type of ideology. I mean, damn, I went to school with them, right? I went to Catholic school. Okay. And there were a lot of them that ended up in this type of marriage where, you know, I would, I knew them when they, you know, had personalities and had interests and hobbies and things they love to do. And then they become wives to men like this. And That is stripped away from them because there is such a distinct and um Limiting viewpoint of what a good wife and mother is it has a very distinct look You know, it's the mom who doesn't get angry the mom who does all the laundry and never complains you know the great cook at home who never drops the smile off her face like That is the expectation of these men to have the perfect wives and the perfect households You A lot of the time, and in order to do that, one, they strip them of any of their personality, right? Because again, the perfect wife looks a certain way. It doesn't, you know, have the humor. It doesn't have the personality. It's just very, very limiting. Um, And then secondly, it doesn't allow for them to ever be honest about their struggles, because that doesn't look good. So a lot of women suffer in silence under this dynamic, because they are trying to be like the pious, perfect wife. I had a, uh, an old colleague, Where, uh, when he and his wife and they had, they had a baby around the same time as, uh, we had our first and I was so exhausted, I would come into work just cause we, we, you know, we worked out time where, and the first baby, we, we didn't have our system in place yet. So our system at the time was just like, whenever she wakes up, I wake up with her and I'd like, I'd give her a shoulder rub and like comfort and like water or whatever she needed to do. Like we were in it together. Oh, you both got up. Yeah. We got up every time together. Oh shit. You got to do shifts. Yeah. We learned after that we, but I didn't, I didn't, I was just like, I don't want to make, I didn't feel like I didn't want her to feel alone. You don't want to sleep through it. Yeah. Yeah. With her, she's, you know, and our first child was being breastfed. And so like the, like there was so little I could do. Yes. And so we were just both living dead. And then when I went back to work, I'm like, you know, Yes, I don't even remember basically what I was doing was probably dangerous for me to be driving at even at the time Yeah, but one of my my colleagues I saw him and he just looked demon and he by the way He had more this was like his sixth or seventh kid. Like they had a lot of kids Um, I asked also, how do you manage to look so so and he was oh, well, she knows that I I get tired Uh, and so, like, so, like, I, I can't, I can't function if I don't get a good night's sleep, so she does all the, all the stuff, like, overnight, and I just make sure I get my, my sleep. Ooh. Oh, no. That makes my bones hurt. This person was, uh In Arizona as well, where it was very, I don't, I almost feel like you can't do that in California. You can't do that. Uh, it's, so I have two sides of this, right? Like I am a mom. Okay. And so like, even with my mom page, I've heard some, so many horror stories like that. Uh, but also. I have a wife Who I love and adore and know what it took to like have a baby like whole again jesus lord, um, and the idea of like well, that's that's her job like We did shifts we did shifts every single night like as much as I could make it 50 50 I tried to do that. Obviously it wasn't because she's breastfeeding She was recovering, you know, there there was no way I was ever going to be able to You Give truly but I did my best right and the idea that so many men are just like no No, I mean, I don't like I don't like changing diapers. Sorry It's like if that's how you're gonna be you need to tell a woman that you want the title of dad But you don't want to do any of the work You don't have the right to tell women you want to be a father if you don't want to play any of the parts, if you don't want to have any of the responsibility, which these men are often like, it's like they want the title of dad, but they don't want to do any of the care tasks or, you know, have any of the responsibility that, you know, I want to be a dad, but I don't want to miss out on my golf game. And there's, there's like certain, like, obviously time constraints means there's sometimes you can't do everything, but you, it's a matter of putting in the effort and finding what you can do, right? Like what, what can you do to, like every morning, uh, my wife will get up. And I have about two hours to shower and just get ready and kind of by herself while I make breakfast, get the kids ready for school and get all that kind of stuff ready because her day is harder than mine, right? Her day is much harder than mine in the sense that she is, especially with taking my youngest to different support services and, and, you know, dealing with tantrums and dealing with meltdowns and all the others. I'm like, I know for a fact that. while we're both working at the same time, she's working harder than I am, uh, during the day. And so what can I do to set, you know, and support her versus in, in a traditional household, right? I'm the one making the money. She should be waking up early to make me breakfast. And, and that seems, I don't want to even understand how that, how you could have someone doing that. And then, you know, Unless you've just completely compartmentalized the idea that what they do at home is not work. That's what I was just gonna say. You call it work, they don't call it that. They're like the privilege. You get to be lazy at home. Uh, what? Uh, no. And again, it's dudes like these that like, facilitate that. Because it's this idea that like, it's just, it's your vocation. It's just what you're meant to do. It comes so naturally to you. Uh, but it's not work. It's just being a, you're a woman, you're meant to be a mom. It just, yeah, just, you know, just, it's so easy for you. It's like, No, no, no, it's not natural. It's not easy. Right. When you do struggle then as a mom, you're as a parent, I would say, but in this situation, I'd say as a mom, you end up feeling like not only are you a failure as a parent, but you're a failure as a woman, right? Because the idea is you, cause if all you're hearing is that this is what you should be doing, this is your vocation in life. This is What you should be blessed and lucky to be able to do. Then the second you struggle, it's, it's not, why is this so hard? It's what am I doing wrong? What's wrong with me? And internally, I'm just Jesus. And that's what they're at. That's a hundred percent what they think too. Like I've seen so many women struggle. You know, they'll be posting all this happy stuff, but like you know the behind the scenes and you know that they're struggling and like it doesn't come naturally to anybody and like the idea that taking care of children, like not just raising children, but raising children in a loving environment where you're surrounding them with like support and you you are in a healthy headspace so that you can help You know, parent them in a healthy way, you're, you're holding boundaries all day, every day, you know, you have to have really good emotional regulation. That's for me. That was like the hardest one. Um, cause you know, they're tantruming, they're doing all that kind of stuff. And you really have to be in control of yourself. Like all of those things are incredibly hard. And. Like I, I think a big trick of the patriarchy and misogyny in general is convincing women that like the home, things in the home, like taking care of kids, care tasks, are the easy part. Because I, I, I shudder to think these dudes that are like this, what the next generation of children would be like if they raised them. If, if parenting is easy, you're doing something wrong, right? Right. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's like, I I've seen men like that throw tantrums themselves. Absolutely. You know what I mean? But there is that idea when men are around their kids, not all men, obviously, but men that are like this, or that think being a dad is easy or being a mom is easy. And then so therefore being dad is if you leave them alone with their kids for I don't even know, two hours. They're absolutely losing their minds. They're screaming at the kids. I knew somebody whose ex said to them, she was like, okay, we'll go take him for a couple hours. You know, you guys are gonna hang out. And he's like, well, what am I supposed to do with him about his child? Right. He couldn't think of a way to fill the time. Mm-Hmm. And it's like, there are so many men who like, don't know how to take care of their kids. Like how, like what their interests are, what they like to do, what activities they would enjoy, like where to take them. Mm-Hmm. all of these things are learned, you know? Mm-Hmm. and all these things women work really hard at and Mm-Hmm. It's, it's fascinating to me that, that men will try and say how easy it is to be a mom and then absolutely fold and crumble within an hour of being alone with their kids. Yeah, uh, my wife and I were having a conversation about this the other day, um, where, like, so she, she's gonna, she goes on trips, obviously, and she'll leave and she doesn't have to leave me a bunch of notes and everything. I figure it out. I got it. Yeah, we, the one thing, luckily we have a, a calendar that helps me with like, the, because the one thing I don't always know is what time is this class again? Because I'm not, yeah. That's fair. Shared calendars are great. It was amazing. Yeah. But, uh, the, the idea though, that I do struggle more when I'm alone with all three kids versus when she is not because she's, What a quote, naturally better at it, but because our, she has more experience with it, she's doing it more. The system is in the same way, the stuff like I do, whenever she has to make breakfast to the kids, they always get really upset because they're so, I know exactly the way they like everything cooked because of that. And, and so, or like bat, I do usually bath time with their kids and there's a certain way. And it's so funny. Cause I have all three of my kids are neurodivergent. So before anybody thinks I'm like, so. Spoiling my kids or anything, this is, this is what we do in a neurodivergent household. Oh, but there's certain, yeah, there's very specific order of things and routines that we follow. Yes, it'll save you. Yeah. And so whenever we switch, obviously she also will struggle with those things because she did, there's no way there's, there's, you have to department. Yeah. But. It's like, it's so the, the second that I struggle with it, I'm not like, Oh, this is why I never do it. There's a reason for it, but you can't see past that idea that, yeah, of course it doesn't look like she's quote unquote working as hard or like she's struggling as much because she had went through that in the beginning, right? That was already, she already went that just as like, when you do any job, any sort of work, any sort of task related thing where you're, you're working with something. The more you do it, the better you get at it, right? And, and it's, I don't understand the block between understanding that it's not just this natural God given gift to women that they are better with children, uh, or better at doing this thing that it's no, they've worked in those instances. It's just, they have experienced, they've done it more, right? There are certain people that are, are going to naturally be better, but it's literally like any other job. The more you do it, the better you're going to get at it. I think also there's a part of it where if they believe that it helps their narrative and it makes them feel better because part of this whole debate, um, and this dynamic is the weaponizing competence, right? Absolutely. Because when a lot of men, particularly if they're kind of like that guy, right? Um, Are met with that thing that happens, you know, whether they yell at their kids or if they can't stop the baby from crying, like whatever it is, they will immediately do the handoff. They will immediately be like, well, that's why I don't do it. Or, you know, you have those instances, for example, when women will go on, you know, a girl's night, or they'll go, literally, it could be, they'll be gone for like two hours, and they come home to a destroyed house. And, you know, the takeaway from that is often, like, oh, well. You know, I can't trust him, you know, that's the message. It's not even just the takeaway because Obviously you're going to take that away But the message from the man is like I can't do this and I won't do this And if you leave me you can't trust me. It's like when men fall asleep with babies There's so many videos of that or like toddlers and you're like, hey like funny video except not at all because that's really dangerous But it teaches women, like, I'm not going to pick up the slack. I'm not going to do the thing I said I would. Uh, you can't rely on me. And it's very intentional. And the way men can get away with that type of behavior is to say, Well, you know, that's just nature, baby. That's just, you know, it's just natural that she knows, you know, that she shouldn't fall asleep when the baby is, you know, actively running around the house. Uh, so it's, it's a, it's a very self serving system for them. They will thrive in that and they will feel no guilt in that because they have men like this being like, Oh yeah, she should be able to do that. That's, that's how it should be. Here's the thing about him though. I think the funniest part of this from a sports fan perspective is like, uh, This, no, I don't even want to go down this route though, but it's just, he's a kicker. He's a kicker. I know, right? It's like, bro. It's not even like, you're barely a football player. Oh my god. Oof, there are people that want him cut for the team now. Yeah, there's a, there's a, uh, uh, petition going out that there are people trying to, to cut any, honestly, it, I could see it happening, uh, if there's enough of a backlash because of the fact that it's not like he's the quarterback. He's a kicker! We can get a new kicker today! Yeah. Ooh, here's, um, someone, he said this about his speech. In a just world, Harrison But Kerr would be cut by tomorrow and never play another NFL snap. I don't care if that's harsh. You shouldn't be allowed to continue being a pro athlete if you're given the honor of a graduation speech and use it to tell women to get back in the kitchen. I think people, people don't understand. There are, there are consequences, right? And for things you say, and that's, that's the, or yeah, theoretically, it probably won't, nothing will happen to this. People will forget about it. They're going to rely on the news cycle It's picking up as the elections come on and nobody will remember anything this guy said in, in two months from now, everything I say online, everything you say online, the fact that we have a podcast called Mr. Pick me in the man hater, right? I'm, I am prepared that if I were to go in public or, or in, in the. Outside of my my house or outside of online that there's going to be some backlash for those sort of things and I've accepted that But when you flip the coin on the other side and say like well, you should also have backlash But they how dare you try to repress me for for what I believe in That's the other thing is like these dudes are always so shocked when people have a problem with what they said that what? What? What? I just can't say anything anymore. It's like, well, yeah, no, I don't think you should tell women who have just worked their ass off for four years and all the years before that to get to where they are to graduate on the moment where they should be celebrated for their achievements for you to just say, this achievement isn't shit. You need to go be a mom. And that's the only value you bring to the world. Yeah. I don't think so. I don't think that was matters. Right. I don't think you should say it ever, but I definitely don't think you should say. I like. I believe people have the right to believe what they want to believe. Even things I hate, I disagree with, because I want them to also believe I have the right to believe, uh, what I believe. But, I don't, like, a great example is like, everyone assumes because I'm a college professor that I must be, indoctrinating my students with all of my Lefty McLefterson ideology in the classroom. Simpy Simperton, Lefty Lefterton. Same, you must be. I'm demasculinizing my students by making them research. You have to wear pink only. I can separate my classroom. Yeah, from my belief system, right? I can separate what I do in front of a group of students, right? There's a reason why I can have, you know, I taught, uh, in a very conservative part of Arizona. I mentioned for years and my students loved me and I had very conservative students that still loved me. Uh, even though technically the, the, you know, I was this, this super Person that they would probably hate in a interpersonal setting, but because I'm able to separate those sorts of things. And I know that if I were to get in front of a classroom, right. And say those things say, and, and kind of just spout off about my beliefs, that there would have been repercussions. And I would have had to accept that, right. But people can't accept that there, that there are situations where you. If you have a giant platform and you say something, there are going to be people that have negative feedback towards you. Yeah, I think it's also some people refuse to distinguish like there's things where you have a belief and then there's things where you are actively doing harm and promoting doing harm and promoting hate that does harm. Those are different things. No, you're right. You're right. And that's, that's where people are like, well, it's just, it's like, well, if you're inciting violence, um, if you are, if your belief is that other people should have harm come to them or that they shouldn't have the same rights. As you do, uh, that's, those are two different things. That is something that is, needs to be addressed. And that does have consequence. That's an important point. Yeah. I mean, you can say it, but at the end of the day, you are doing harm and there will be consequences for that. People are too comfortable saying this horrible stuff. Now it feels like there used to be, there was a time where it was hushed. We used to feel bad about it. I don't even think that's, I think a lot of it used to be very accepted. Like, this, this speech, if you would have given it 20 years ago, everyone would have been like, you know? Um, because a lot of people were silenced. It wasn't that it was ever okay, it's that like, it was so mainstream that people didn't feel comfortable voicing their opinions. opposition to it. And so I think what's happening is there are so many people who are, I mean, look at, like, I'm white, so like, white people in general are so, are incredibly privileged, right? Particularly here in this society. Um, but there are so many people like, A lot of times white or like upper class or whatever it is, uh, or even like certain religions that were so dominant for so long that have never felt pushback and have never felt, you know, what it feels like when someone is like verbal and vocal about why they don't like what you're saying and. They're like, what the, what the hell? Like, why is everything changed? Like, no, people are just being honest now. People are safe enough to be honest with you. It's not that what you said was acceptable ever. It's just now people are in the position where they don't think like horrible consequence, which like, There are people who have died, you know, there are people of color who have died for speaking up against white women and men, you know, there are people, there are women who have died for speaking out against men. Um, so like there were dire consequences before and now we just have people finally feeling somewhat safe enough or being brave enough. Maybe they're not even safe, but maybe they're just. brave enough to say something. You're right, though. People act like, well, it used to be okay to say these things. It was never okay, right? People were still being harmed and hurt by these things. It just, what, what wasn't okay was, you're right, speaking out against it, was, was showing, was allowing, because there were so many people that bought into it and were, and didn't even notice that it was harmful, uh, that, that nothing was said. I mean, I've had this conversation with different people. You know me, I'm always getting into fights with, um, men, but, um, no, only the men. We get along so well though, how's that possible? What are you talking about? I, like, I, I genuinely try to be very respectful when talking to people, unless they, you know, unless they're, you know, trying to start shit with me, then that's different, but then there's a different side. But like, I remember I was talking to a guy who was older. I don't know if I've told this story before or not. So if you've heard it, just chill for a second. Um, but he was a guy I worked with. Heather gets it. Yeah, Heather gets it. Uh, he was a much older actor. So, um, I don't know. He's probably in his I'd say he's in his 50s, 60s maybe. Don't tell myself that. Um, those actors. But he was talking about He's 37 years old. Just fuck with you. He's 48. Uh, no. Um, and he was talking about the fact that he's like, yeah, I used to be able to joke around and it wasn't a big deal. Cause he like worked in like a big corporate office where like, you know, I'm sure the women were more so in the secretary were like, it wasn't that long ago that that's kind of the dynamic and like, like butt pinching, like all that shit that would happen all the time. And, and he didn't say butt pinching. Cause obviously I would've been like, what the, uh, but he was just saying like, we used to build a joke and. And finally, you know, he was talking about it and he was genuinely talking about it. He wasn't like saying like, this is bullshit. He was just like, it's crazy how it's changed. And I was like, well, do you think that like the sense of humor of people has changed and that these women didn't have a problem with what you were doing? Or do you think they were not allowed to speak up without fear of, repercussion and potentially losing their job had they told you they were uncomfortable. And then he was like, oh, well, I guess, you know, he did, you can tell you genuinely thought about it, but I don't think it crosses people's minds. There are people who will still say that like people didn't mind being like, like servitude. You know what I mean? Like, like slaves or like, uh, you know, people that worked in the home, um, the help as a, you know, quote unquote, right? And it's like, um, do you think that they, that they were happy or do you think they weren't allowed to tell you? Right. Do you think they were in a circumstance where they had to placate to you in order to survive? Mm hmm, but it's like because they just they're like, well, they never told me I'm like no shit Of course, they didn't tell you obviously those are older people. I'm not talking to those people the daily basis. They're like 80 That comes out a lot when I talk about, uh, or anytime you bring up like, uh, the age gap, like of, of older men seeking out where they're like, well, it used to be not that big of a deal. Jerry Seinfeld had a 17 year old girlfriend episode. I just did a podcast episode on that. Yeah. She, yeah. He'd pick her up from high school. Um, I just saw a video of, it was like, there was like, they used to marry like literally child brides people in America, like not that long ago. Um, And they're like, they were, they, they was great. Like young, it's like, no, it wasn't. No, it wasn't. They literally, a lot of times they didn't have a say in it. A lot of times it was their parents. A lot of times it was for land or power. The women were used as pawns. Like it was never like, you have to take all circumstance away and, and say, would this person be marrying this other person if there wasn't this huge need. Outside of love. Would they ever be with this person? Right? No, no. If there wasn't something, well, have you seen a Anthony Kiedis? From uh, what was it? Red hot chili peppers. Is that the right band? I know He's a pedophile for sure. Yeah, he's 61 and he has a 19 year old girlfriend. He's been getting with High schoolers for a long time. That's why I stopped listening to them I had to stop listening to him because he openly has gotten hold on. Let me look i'll look it up for you But I saw the and so I I didn't even know there was more to this because I didn't I just saw the picture like oh, no, he's he's been known what uh for dating underage people Oh, that's why I stopped listening to red hot chili peppers. Yeah You The images of him and his now girlfriend look it's oh, there's a grandfather and his granddaughter like it's it's so absolutely absurd. He's disgusting. Hold on. Oh, shit. He was convicted of sexual battery in 1989. Whaaat? He's had a lot of harassment claims and inappropriate, uh, behavior claims. Especially with his fans, like, there's been multiple stories of him, like, trying to rip people's clothes off. Here's from an article. It's not like the band themselves has ever denied their actions. In scar tissue, between its moments of jumping off roofs and shooting up heroin with his father, Kiedis acknowledged his sexual relationship with a 14 year old girl when he was a decade older. It's not like The next day we drove to Baton Rouge, and of course she came with us. He said, after we got off stage, she came up to me and said, I have something to tell you. My father's the chief of police in the entire state of Louisiana. It's looking for me because I've gone missing. Oh, and besides that, I'm only 14. He also has the song, Catholic School Girls Rule. Yeah, he openly dated a 14 year old when he was 24. I told you, dude, go listen to that podcast. I don't want to recall all of it, but like, no, no, no. I'll go check. Not you. I did all the listeners, but I do, but I want to now too. Cause I didn't hear that one yet. Steven Tyler, Steven Tyler, uh, became the legal guardian of a 16 year old. So he could take her across state lines. She's. Has criminal there are criminal filings. I don't know if it's civil or if it's through the police, but there's There's definitely a case there Because he wanted to sleep with her and take her on tour when to 16 and literally convinced her parents to give Them legal him legal guardianship of their daughter. The greater point we're making though is it's not that it was somehow okay back then It's just that it was and it was unspoken. It was always wrong People always should have known that it was right and there were people back then that also said that's gross and that's disgusting Yes, it's not like they were it's like when people the whole slavery issue you brought up, right? There were people back then speaking out against slavery, right? There were people that were very aware of the That it was wrong to own another human being. I think everyone likes to pretend like, Oh no, that it was this universal belief system that it was okay to date young women, that it was okay to do this thing. And no people back then also knew that it was weird or problematic or horrific, depending on what act you're talking about. Again, it's based off of the fact that you're saying, well, these people we were abusing never said we were. Like, I wonder why, I wonder why, uh, the people, you know, the slaves that you had wouldn't be like, Hey, this sucks, because of all the abuse they were suffering, they had no power. I mean, we don't need to get into that, but point being like, Or the women, like, I don't know, why would a young woman who is being forced into marrying you and is probably in an abusive relationship, why, I wonder why she wouldn't object, I wonder if she felt like she had the space or power to do so, like, if you were relying on the fact that you didn't get pushed back when you did something that is just was the It's obviously wrong regardless of pushback. It doesn't matter just because they weren't in the position They didn't have the power to say no like That's so crazy to me that I people still think like that But at the same so you have people are like well, it was that way before it used to be accepted But then as we just mentioned, there's there are big hollywood stars There are rock stars and you know Actors famous actors to this day. It's still happening like now They're hiding it better But you still have people dating teenagers and it's like, it's almost revered. It's almost looked as something, uh, you should aspire to. And it's like, ugh, it's gross. It's all so gross. And I think the back to kind of what he was saying and the idea of traditional. Vocational and all these sort of things we evolve is as humans, right? We're supposed to be learning and growing. And there are, oh, there are all sorts of things that both in the church and in, in society that we did at one point, we've mentioned several of them that at one point were commonplace and are not anymore. And why? Because we grew and we acknowledged and we changed. Nothing is immune to them, right? There's parts of the Bible that people don't follow anymore. Because they can accept, oh, well, that's, that's clearly not what they, we, we couldn't do that. You know, I'm allowed to wear mixed linens on my body, cutting my hair like this. There's all sorts of justifications people make because as we grow as a society, we accept and we learn, oh yeah, maybe that isn't the best way to do things, but they will still cling on to certain things that as, as the un, Forgivable, un, uh, inarguable truth that we have to follow as if other things that weren't at one point inarguable truths are now not followed. Um, and it's really sad how long it takes and how hard it is to make these changes happen. Um, but here we are and they're still happening. Yeah. I think you always just need to look at like, who does it serve? Mm hmm. These rules like what he said what he said to these women who have just earned their degrees You need to go Your, your degree doesn't matter, which, you know, is basically like, I don't care what you think, I know you're here for this reason, I know you've got this degree, it's meaningless, um, you need to go in the kitchen, why? Well, he tells us why, because you are meant to aid your husband, that is what he says, he could not be, it's not even like, her emotional, like, It's, it's literally like you facilitate my lifestyle, like if the woman is not in the home doing all of the work, then the house would crumble, rather than why don't we work together, like that, that it serves him, you are in service to him in the scenario he presented, and I don't care how soft these people sell things to you when you hear somebody selling you something, you have to look like, do I gain anything from this or am I, am I being the sacrifice? The woman's identity and her life and her goals and her degree, all of that is sacrificed to the man's vocation. Her vocation is to sacrifice herself, right? To his vocation. And I think You have to look past that he's being Creepy about how much he loves his wife, which by the way, he got her to convert. That's an interesting point In the thing, he says she converted like very interesting, right? You you you align with me. I don't align with you but this idea that like You have to push past the, the sweet, quote unquote sweetness, or, or the soft sell, or making it seem like it's this beautiful thing, and think, as a woman who just got my degree, who clearly has goals, to use this degree, right? How does what you're saying serve me as a person? Does this do anything for me? Does this aid in, in my vocation, which is clearly not what he's saying it is, right? Because you, at the very least there's dual vocations. Um, and I think that's, that's where we're getting to the point is because like, now people are being less overt because it's not anymore. So just being really careful when you hear, um, People, like, if something strikes you as weird, just think for a second, like, what is the goal of this statement? Who are they talking to? And who, who is served by this if it follows through? And it almost feels like the college, by choosing this person to give this message, Right, I think, it's like, this is, like, maybe they're not allowed to, uh, To overtly say these things in their classes as much anymore. Maybe they're not allowed, allowed. We have to allow women to attend our campus now or college. Now we have to allow them to have these degrees. We have to allow blah, blah, blah. This is like their way of just like very, not covertly, right. It's in your face of saying, just remember everything that led you to this point has been a lie. And if you believe that lie, then you're giving into temptation and you are not living your truth. The only truth is what this kicker is telling you. As he quotes his teammates, girlfriend, what's her name again? I don't know. Something. I think she's the musician. It's just, it's her hobby. It's a hobby. She does. I mean, it's her side vocation. We really want her to just focus on the one. Uh, yeah. No, I totally agree. Those, those would be like the main, the main words, right? At the graduation. Yeah, it's uh, it's something. It's definitely something. Um, It is overt, like the, the message is overt. But again, there's such a covert nature. And, um, kind of wrapping it up in like, this is, this is what you're made to do. This is what God wants you to do. Um, God, I just love my wife so much because she does it. Like, I do appreciate her. Don't you want to be loved like I love my wife? Let's not listen to this guy. I would say that is truly bad advice. Um, I can't believe he called Taylor Swift, my friend's girlfriend. Like, Ew, dude, just say you're a misogynist, bro. Honestly, you're like, are you honestly trying to like neg Taylor Swift when you're the kicker? Come, I made a silly video about the Superbowl before the Superbowl saying, Oh, Taylor Swift's boyfriend is playing a game this weekend. Yeah. Anger and vitriol I got from these guys like that were so mad at me for having the audacity to downplay Travis Kelsey, the for, for, for daring to do exactly what this guy did not ingest. In this speech, but it was so I wasn't prepared. I thought people, I thought, I mean, there were a lot of people that it was funny because it was, it was just a silly joke, but the genuine vitriol and DMS I got of people that were so angry about me. Calling him Taylor Swift's boyfriend when that was the joke that was the whole point of the video and it's so interesting cuz like these dudes Don't care about Travis Kelsey, like maybe they like him as a player Maybe they like the team but like in general these dudes do not care They care that another like they care that a woman is being put above a man period point blank. I don't care anybody says like The way that they went off about that, and again, like, there is no denying, like, globally, that Taylor Swift is more famous than Travis Kelce. Travis Kelce will tell you that. He's even said that, yeah, he has literally said, like, he's very aware. Of the power dynamic from that perspective in their relationship. It's not an insult to say that. No, it's just the idea that the woman is getting more praise is getting more. I mean, the same thing I have with Simone Biles when her boyfriend was like, yeah, I didn't even know who she was. Um, they just can't stand that a woman is above them. And so that's why we end up with guys like these saying, Hey, you know what? Don't be Taylor Swift. Don't be my friend's girlfriend. Go home. Just stay home. Don't achieve anything besides motherhood. Don't aspire to be this high achieving woman that I'm literally quoting in this speech about telling you not to be a high achieving woman. I mean, it almost feels like he threw that in there just to dig at Taylor Swift because it's like, that quote, like, I don't understand the purpose of that quote within the speech. Like. Yeah. Means nothing. You just wanted to say, By the way, I'm not calling her Taylor Swift. No. I will call her only Travis Kelsey's girlfriend. My friend's girlfriend, so. And even if he meant it to be like this cute little like, When hint hint wink wink. It's still so freaking When when in what's in context in the context of the speech, it makes it so much more horrible Yes, it's like he's trying to get like credit for being friends with taylor swift while also downplaying her achievements It's like you can't have both buddy. You can't do both. Sorry. Sorry Uh, I can't just go i'm done now. I cannot go on anymore. No, it's that's I think this is a good place Oh, okay. Well Guess what everybody We've been saying it for weeks and weeks and weeks. For 10 episodes now, we have mentioned the possibility. We have a Patreon! Ding, ding, ding, ding! Woo! We're excited. Um, we're starting off, I think I have the post on there, where we're asking like, do you have any questions? We want to do a Q& A. We got a lot of fun plans for it. Uh, Heather is currently our only She's our sole supporter right now. She is keeping us going. But if you want to be like Heather, um, please feel free to join our Patreon. Again, we're going to do super fun content. We'll have extra videos, probably extra episodes. We'll be doing Q and A's, lots of fun stuff. Technically we've been losing money every week as we do this podcast. So it would be nice to get enough that we're At the very least, not paying to make content for people. That'd be cool. That'd be cool, I think. That'd be a beautiful goal. That'd just be nice. Uh, also, we are doing As of last week's episode from your, your random suggestion, we are going to do a giveaway. So we're going to look at the five star reviews and we're going to pick a name. So if you enjoy our podcast, please leave us a five star review. It's very helpful for us with like the algorithm and all kinds of things being seen. I don't know. I don't know how that works showing up in search results or something like that. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Um, And which we were the number one podcast in Costa Rica and Poland. Shout out to Costa Rica and Poland, Poland for your support to different climates. Um, and we have our YouTube up and our Instagram. So check us out there. Why do you always do this to me? You just buy out of nowhere. I'm not good at beginnings and ends Do you want to tell them you love them again? I love you Okay. Bye friends. Bye