#20: Illuminating Stories: The Art of Light and Authenticity in Photography and Storytelling with Lauren Bodwell

Have you ever wondered about the profound connection between photography and storytelling or how they intertwine to create captivating stories? Join us as we unravel this intriguing relationship with our esteemed guest, Lauren Bodwell, a seasoned portrait photographer with a decade-long experience. Lauren's approach to photography is uniquely authentic, and her insights shed light on the role of light in narrating tales through pictures. 

Lauren's journey into photography is enriched by her personal experiences, especially motherhood, which she shares has helped her break down barriers and become more vulnerable in her art. She also delves into the realm of Instagram reels, showcasing her unique perspective and adding a fresh take on storytelling in photography. Lauren shares valuable advice on moving past self-consciousness and embracing authenticity while capturing moments, while also emphasizing the importance of setting aside time for creativity. 

But what happens to the stories after they're captured? Lauren shares practical tips on preserving memories through various mediums, be it photo books, digital albums, or external hard drives. She also touches upon the power of incorporating audio and video into storytelling, and the significance of building a community of like-minded individuals. Join us on this journey of capturing and preserving memories, and get inspired to start creating your own visual narratives today!

Check out Lauren at www.laurenbodwellphotography.com or follow her on Instagram @LaurenBodwell (Don't Miss Jam Time ;-)

This group is for people who are in the process of writing their own personal stories to preserve their past for their future. It’s a place to come for story writing inspiration, weekly writing-related events and memes, and continued support from me and the other members.

Join like-minded people and get your stories down on paper for your future generations!

Transcript

Melissa: 0:01

Welcome to the Preserve your Past podcast, where we'll explore all things related to the creative process of writing your stories for future generations. I'm your host, melissa Ann Kitchum, author, teacher, speaker and coach. I believe that your personal history is a priceless gift for family, friends and generations to come, whether you consider yourself a writer or not. We are discussing the topics that help with every step of the process, like how to mine for the juiciest story ideas or how to refine them into polished final drafts you'll be proud to share. Let's face it sure, your stories can be overwhelming, but I've got you covered. We all have a lifetime of memories to share, so why not save yours to pass along? Let me help you leave your lasting legacy. Welcome, everybody, to another episode of the Preserve your Past podcast. I have with me today another guest that I am so excited to share with you. It's a friend I have had who actually has played an integral part of my transition, of telling my story and being more fearless, being myself and showing up as myself, and I'm so excited to share you with her. Welcome, lauren, to the podcast. This is Lauren Bodwell. Hi and thank you for joining. Thank you for having me. Welcome.

Melissa: 1:41

Lauren Bodwell is a wife and mom of two girls, which has helped her to pursue her love of photography as a career. With 10 years of professional photography experience, she has honed her skills as a portrait photographer, especially in capturing special moments through the art of storytelling, which is why she's here with us. Her deep affinity for light and its power to illuminate the world is a guiding force behind her work. Through her lens, the world's captivating stories come to life. Lauren's mission is to convey narratives that inspire and empower individuals to embrace their authentic selves and appreciate the beauty inherent in everyday life. So I think after listening to that biography, everyone can understand how we see the connection of why you are here today. So thank you so much, lauren.

Melissa: 2:37

Just to give some history to people too, lauren and I met through a training program and did a couple of live workshops together as participants, and Lauren is such an amazing photographer that when I had first begun my first coaching practice and was really ready to be visible and show myself, she's the person I trusted with my taking my pictures, which I do not feel like I'm a very. That's not a comfort zone for me, so we're going to talk a little bit about that, but anyone who wants to see some of Lauren's beautiful work can look at my website, melissaannekitchencom. I'm going to have her give some info at the end, but I want to say thank you so much, lauren. You're just you're. Everything about the way you come to photography is just so nurturing for everyone who gets to participate with you. So thank you.

Lauren: 3:35

Thank you, yeah, and your. Your podcast picture is one of the ones I took too.

Melissa: 3:40

Yes, I pretty much. Those are the ones I use.

Lauren: 3:44

I love that shoot. I remember it being very windy it was.

Melissa: 3:48

It was very, very windy. So the interesting part too is and to tie it back in is that Lauren and I met up. So it's so. There's so many things I could talk about, but if we transition into that piece, first of all, I was again not comfortable having pictures, knew I wanted to have them. We had such a blast. It turned into friends, like family. I brought my sister, I brought a friend that I had worked with who is also a makeup artist, and we froze our butts in the fall. It was October. It's going to be the anniversary of like what we did.

Melissa: 4:20

The picture soon and it was one of the things you did really well was like the intake of knowing who I was and being able to tell my story. So that's again where you even mentioned in your bio that this is one of your superpowers, it's one of the things you love. Anyone who looks at those pictures knows now I can see like I love old buildings, I love history, I love the ocean. So a lot of what we took that was for a different business model totally told enough of my authentic story that I was able to still use them.

Lauren: 4:59

So yeah, I think to nobody likes their photos taken. That seems to be an overall theme that I see like, especially in women, like over and over and over again, but I think people think it's scarier than it really is. So and one way of telling your story is through visual art. Yeah, especially now with social media and websites and people owning their own businesses, it's like it's very, very important because people need to see who they're working with right.

Melissa: 5:34

So taking that to the next piece of like not just business owners and that piece of being uncomfortable. I think I see the same thing in storytelling. So my story, my encouragement for my listeners and my readers is that they begin documenting their stories, whether it's creating the stories around their ancestors and data or whether it's starting with themselves, because that's kind of my mantra is let's start with ourselves. But it is sometimes very hard to tell those authentic, real stories. In the same way, it's challenging to be in the photos with everyone else. Yeah, go ahead. No, I was going to say how are how? What? Tell me a bit, because I know we've talked about this a little bit and I know that you are also putting as the photographer. That's even more of a challenge for you to put yourself in the photos for your girls. But are there some things that you do to kind of assist people or that have been a mindset shift for you and just that challenge of being part of your own pictures and your own story?

Lauren: 6:42

Yeah, I think, when I first started.

Lauren: 6:45

So photography has always been a part of my life growing up and then, once I had my oldest, my oldest daughter, I knew that it was important to either capture her growing up and because I was part of a forum of moms and so all the moms were like be in the photo, you need to be in the photo, and that was, I think, the biggest thing for me is like to incorporate myself, but I just want to take the photos and so, yeah, it's trying to balance.

Lauren: 7:20

I'm trying to say trying to balance, like you, capturing and documenting your story, but also being included in that story. Yes, I think too, as a new mom and I see this a lot with, like maternity shoots, like documenting the belly and the baby moms don't want to be in the photo because either it's they don't look good, they don't feel good, it's a body image thing. It's no, no, it's not about me, it's about them. I hear that one a lot. It's about my kids, about my kids. Like no, no, because when your kids get older and you're not in the photo, they're like where's mom? Yeah, they just want photos of mom, yeah, yeah.

Melissa: 8:04

So it's interesting because we talk about that a lot, about how, even sometimes with our stories, our kids are not interested in those at a certain age and then all of a sudden we realize we are. So one of my really good friends and I, when I was starting to do this work, was talking about how she didn't know anything about her mom before she was a mom and then, as she got older, started learning more about her and was like, oh my gosh. So now she could say, like my boys are thinking about who I was before I was a mom. But I'm going to make sure I get that down and it's kind of that same thing of like we have those pictures and also I, from what I'm hearing to, it's like we do that for the big events. You know we do it for the big events there about other people.

Melissa: 8:49

But even in my story workshops it's a like one of the chapters of my book is actually like include the little things, like we need those little things like. I talk about a story with my mom that was like this one day that happened, that was hysterical and it wasn't like her being like anything. It turned out to be something about her character came out in the story when I told it, but it was just one day, average day, and then adding when we talk about ourselves, the little things about ourselves that show were real, like our language to be the language we would use. So if someone was going to read that, they could see us in the story and hear us.

Lauren: 9:28

I think, looking back, like when you know film was huge and like like very limited and a lot of people didn't have cameras, so like those portraits of, like a grandmother or family portraits were so valuable because that's the only, maybe still portrait you have.

Lauren: 9:46

Like why have my grandmother's portrait on the wall?

Lauren: 9:50

I never got to meet her, but I have her portrait on the wall and that is so important because there's probably maybe less than a dozen photos of her. But like some of my favorite pictures when I scroll back on my phone especially like one of my favorite activities to do is just to look back is those like silly, non important moments, like eating ice cream, or even just like special places, like going up to camp, or we actually just had family camping this weekend. We had like there was 32 of us, it was cousins, aunt and uncles, grandparents like sister, like brothers, like everyone, and so we do a group photo and that's great. But then you have photos of like the campfire and roasting marshmallows and the little cousins on their backs, and so I think it's really good because snapping photos along the way helps to create those stories and help with the visuals, and I think that's the part of the storytelling that I like, because I just captures like these moments that are for my kids are core memories For me.

Lauren: 10:58

It might not necessarily be like this huge thing, but they're like, you know, there was 10 cousins or something playing together and it was like it's very much a core memory, so when they look back on that they're like I have a picture of this and yeah, yeah, it reaches back to bring them back to that time.

Melissa: 11:14

Yeah yeah, it's neat to, because thinking about the even how we can use our photos to remind us of those feelings when we're telling the story, so often one of the prompts I'll have people use to a simple way to start which it seems so obvious. But it's not just so that you have, like, here's the prop and we're going to describe what's in the picture, because we can see what's in the picture with their eyes. But it's fun to look at the picture and remember and tell about all the other things that were kind of happening them around it or how you felt during it. Like you were talking about, like them looking back and remembering. You know what. You know what they were feeling when they were playing with all their cousins, or then they might remember some particular thing. It's so funny.

Melissa: 12:01

I have pictures of my first birthday that I have in one of the one of the Binders photo albums that I have from growing up and one of the stories when I used to go through it. I used to go through it since I was little, you know. Then you go through, you you're telling yourself your memories that you remember of that, if you really remember it. Yeah, in my mind my dad and I were home having a first birthday party for me because my mother was not in this picture. Yeah, I literally, when I was a little licking through those, thought, oh, dad and I had a night I want to wear mom. No, I also goes to that like being in the pictures. But it's also funny how we use those, as throughout childhood and adulthood, to like anchor in remembering.

Lauren: 12:56

I always say that my husband has really really nice photos of him and the kids like there are hundreds of photos of just him and the girls and they're beautiful, yeah. And then it's like, not, that he takes really nice photos and he makes sure that I'm in the photos and he'll take the camera away from me, but like it's different. It's different when it's someone I don't know. It's so, yeah.

Melissa: 13:19

Yeah, so we've talked about this a lot. So we've talked about Both of us starting our businesses With the idea that we had to be a certain way to be in front of people, that marketing was done a certain way, and I think, while we both love talking to people, um, it never for me. Anyways, I won't speak for you, but I know I've. I've watched your journey on social media, which has turned out to be fabulous, because I think you have.

Melissa: 13:50

I'm sure it's not easy still, but I feel like you're very authentic and you you share your thoughts and the little thoughts right about, like and I love it and I I really want to get more into like Putting in my thoughts, into that the same way I'm I'm doing in my writing, but putting it more out on social media.

Melissa: 14:14

But how and we've talked about that idea of of what feels right to us for vulnerability how did you get from that? How did that journey looks like from the beginning of when you were really amping up your photography and felt like you know you need it, you knew you needed to be more visible, but then you and and it was kind of happening I mean, let's, we've known each other for a few years now as social media was kind of shifting, because I feel like even Instagram was just beginning to like take off, and so we were trying to think about what does that mean for being a visual storyteller, right? How did that journey of the shoulds to the what you say it like, how you show up now? Because I feel like we do that with and I'm for everyone here, it's not that I'm expecting we're talking about social media but in our stories there's the shoulds of our stories and how we write them, and then it's how do we find our voice? And I think Lauren really did a great job at Signing her authentic voice and not feeling like you had to write it or speak it as if what you thought everyone wanted to hear.

Lauren: 15:15

Yeah, well, thanks. Sometimes I still feel like I haven't found my my true voice, in the sense that I think there's still doubt With like what I want to say and you know when you start to put yourself out there, especially like. I think social media should play a big role in storytelling in our photos, because Now everyone is a photographer and I'm not saying that as a negative thing, I'm saying that it's a very positive thing. But in the beginning I saw myself as just Documenting my family and I thought that I wanted to do that for other people and tell stories and and loved. I was on Instagram like a month after they started it and I was like this is amazing. I get to like take pictures of whatever I want and show people my perspective and Like tell people what I'm looking at. And then it kind of shifted into like, oh, what do people really want to see? Is it supposed to be curated? It's supposed to be perfect, and so that was a little different. And then Then being like this doesn't feel good. Like I like. I just I like certain.

Lauren: 16:24

I love light. Light is what helps tell a story. For me, it's like a, it's like a character in Like your story and that's how I feel when I take pictures. But also it's about the moment. Like I One of my mentors throughout the years. She's like, what makes a really good photograph is like the moment. Like, obviously, composition plays a role, obviously light plays a role, but like, if there's no moment in the photo, then it's just kind of a picture, it's not a and it's not a photo. So there has to be something happening, mm-hmm, and then because of that, I feel like, as a photographer, put a lot of pressure on myself To take, like, this amazing moment.

Melissa: 17:05

Yeah, but the moments are happening anyways, exactly.

Lauren: 17:09

I also. I have to remember that, like when I'm taking pictures for other people, it's their moment, it's not my moment. Oh, it doesn't matter. Yeah, it doesn't matter necessarily what's happening. If I, if I think it's like a like nothing's happening, I'm like, well, that's a bad photo, no one knows what's happening. But it's their family, it's their photo, it's their memories. I don't really care as much. And then like moving forward, like Everything, like everyone's documenting everything, mm-hmm, and so then it's like content or less curated.

Melissa: 17:43

now we're away from the curation.

Lauren: 17:45

Yeah, I think people are wanting more up Simplicity, and so people are trying to figure out like what's the line. So I think I think motherhood has helped me like kind of break down my barriers and be more vulnerable. Like I documented a lot of like my postpartum struggles, like my body changing, like my girls like obviously growing up, like when they were little it was easy to take photos of them because Life was very slow, mm-hmm, like you were just like eat, you know change, like play, sleep, like it was just very slow. So it's like I think I just needed that, those little small moments to document, like I Probably thousands and thousands of photographs on my phone that I haven't edited, that hasn't gone anywhere, I haven't printed, like I kind of feel bad, but I don't know.

Melissa: 18:37

It's I guess, as a photographer, it's finding out what's the most important to you and what you like, what moments you want to tell, and I guess Transition from that and I mean, I didn't even prepare you that I would talk about this, but you said what's important to you and I know you like jam For everyone joining us when you, when we're done with this, and you, when you look up Lauren and you can follow her. But I'm Talking about this even from storytelling, like sharing something that doesn't seem to be a big deal. It's a little thing and it's a silly thing, but it's a you thing, right, and it's actually a thing that people love joining. It's joyful, it's not Political, it's not like this big thing, but it's so much fun. I love joining you in it and it's another connection thing. But she, lauren, has joined a. Well, I don't even you can tell us how it started, but she does some Instagram reels and it started like last. I'll let you talk, but regarding jam, I'm sorry.

Lauren: 19:53

So last, I think it started over a year ago. You guys didn't even realize I watched a tick, tock, I think in 2021, of this creator that had gotten this advent calendar from Bonbon like jam, and I was like what is this like? You know how, opening up admin calendars of the kid yeah, every day you're like and then you eat this like really crappy chocolate. But she had been doing this and I was like I want that and so last year I ordered it. I ordered this 25 day jam calendar and then I was just like I'm gonna Show up on Instagram and eat jam in front of people and it turned out to be this huge thing. Like, people are like what's today's jam? And, yeah, I called it jam time and I don't know. I was just me like, I told, I told her how it was, yeah.

Melissa: 20:45

That's what I love, and I think that gave me the Practice to be you, because it gave you something to distract you from not being you, I think, especially as you went through and it was about the jam.

Lauren: 20:58

So you're like, nope, don't like that one like even your face, like you can't hide it.

Melissa: 21:02

You came out more real, which I think, even writing we could think about. Like, if there's something like that, that I think the habit of doing it over and over right, and then having that thing that takes away our self-consciousness about it's about us Because it's not about us, and then a connecting thing, yeah, and plus the playfulness.

Lauren: 21:24

Yeah, I think I grew up to being very aware of how I was Like. So I grew up with like learning disability. Like you know, I had a hard time reading and writing and everything was very, very difficult and slow for me for a really long time. And then, as an adult, I kind of looked around and was like, oh, no one knows what they're doing. Everyone has their struggles and you kind of Like felt in, like fit in with everybody else.

Lauren: 21:50

So as a kid growing up in school, you feel very like either you're in or you're out, and I was like I was an athlete, so I fit in here, but I didn't fit in over here.

Lauren: 22:00

And so I I would tell myself I'm not a good writer, I don't, I'm not a good reader. Like I take photos they're really pretty, but like I, you know, I can't do this, I can't do that. And then, like you grow up and I'm almost 40, and then you just you have fewer fucks to give. And so I think over the last year or so too, I've kind of been like, you know, clicking, like switching the filter off, like how do I feel about this, how do I want to show up? And even over the summer I went through a little transition about not wanting to show up because I I didn't want to show up Like and fake it. I didn't want to feel like I had to show up or yeah, I love that too. Yeah, I didn't feel like I didn't have anything to say. Nothing was very inspiring. But then I realized that that's okay too, like yeah, you can have.

Lauren: 22:49

You can hide away or you can just like slow down, and I think I was missing being present with, like, my kids especially. I wasn't taking photos for myself. I was taking a lot of photos for other people, which was great, but it didn't feel authentic. Showing up and taking pictures for people who wanted to take, you know, to have that like branding and Portrait shirt, just became like kind of work, like work, work. So I was trying to see where I fit in, I think, as a Because I follow lots and lots of different photographers and different spaces taking pictures of different things and I think For me at the time I was taking pictures of other people for them and I, my voice and my perspective had to like not be included because it was for them, it wasn't for me, which was fine. But I think as a photographer, as an artist, you want your voice or perspective in there just a little bit, and that was. I was being hidden, I think a little bit, trying to take a step back, and I didn't do anything over the summer.

Melissa: 24:00

Oh, I think that's ebb and flow when you're creative anyways is we do need to Make sure that we have that open time to know ourselves or to even just let it flow. I notice I go, I kind of cycle through with even my writing and that there's times when, yeah, it's it's part of it is it's not fun I'm trying to, it's turned into work, part of it is I don't have something to say. So why should I be saying it? Or I don't even know where to start. I have all this but it's bouncing red in my head. That happens to me a lot, where when I give that space and just say I'm taking a break.

Melissa: 24:38

I had to do the same thing this summer. We had some big family Transitions with my son moving overseas, and also we have a couple of house Issues with like construction and things that just felt overwhelming. Some of it was really good stuff, some of it was just busy stuff, but I felt guilty that I wasn't putting as much into my content or my own story documenting and then realized that it was feeling like I can't just sit down and say something If I don't have what it is to say. You know, and I think that's normal I started realizing it's seasonal for me too, which I know you've talked a lot about, like cycle of nature and of Honoring our cycle as women too, in within the month. But also I think that that seasonal you even talked about like the slow time of life with your girls, when things felt slow, but then how it feels bigger or faster.

Melissa: 25:36

And I met your girls and I can't even imagine how fast it is now because they One was still the wild, like she had already found her wings and was flying around, but the other, your second, was a very baby, baby. But but I think that that's something else that we, like anyone who's being creative with Putting their stories down, honors that cycle instead of the fearing of the pause, but also remembering not to Like, dwell on the pause and that you're like it's, it's not fearing that you're doing it. So in the action of like, taking the pause, not feeling guilty, but also not thinking that just because you're in that pause, it's gonna, that's how it's meant to be, and you lost your, your, your glow for the.

Lauren: 26:30

I think that can tie really well into. I wrote something down this morning about how People feel a lot of pressure now to take photos, especially like creators. I have a cat that's turning me. Yeah, I'm the dog. Yeah, like because I I see just like tons and tons of photos every day from Instagram to talk like every like, it's like at you all the time. So I feel like a lot of moms especially, I'm gonna, just because women are like the gatekeepers. I think of their stories, of photos of handing down stuff like Recipes, like heirlooms, whatever it is. I think it's the women that like put this all together, just saying so.

Lauren: 27:11

Moms especially feel the pressure of getting like family photos taken every year. Christmas cards like are the are the prince and an album and not a shoebox. Like where one of the pictures doing on the on the computer are they coming off the computer. Like I have like 25,000 photos on my camera, but people think that's insane. But like I Think too like you don't have to get dressed up and go into a field and get family photos taken if that's not you. I think that sounds nice. I think it's pretty like I Look at fields and I'm like that would be so pretty like at sunset. But like I'm like, realistically, you can just take a photo of your kid coloring at the kitchen table or I don't know, at the school bus, waiting for the school bus, I don't know like it's.

Lauren: 27:57

I Think it's nice to document those times like school pictures and like the first day of school and graduation and like all that stuff. But I also think, like drinking milk at the table, like, yeah, I kid, my kids got bubbles for Easter one year and so we were like that's, take pictures of the bubbles. Yeah, I, I Really, I think when my kids are really little, I used to take pictures of them sleeping. Yeah, and I and I love looking at the photos when they're sleeping, like, yeah, even now, when I walk into my 10 year old's room and she's asleep, she looks like she's two years old and that brings back memories. So I don't know, that's my favorite thing to do Screw it through and you're like.

Melissa: 28:40

Yeah, so that goes along too with, like the stories being able to be written, even from that like almost journal aspect of like documenting over time that you're even for me I bring people back to. So I had just my aunt had just found a it's called. They had they were called line a day journals, similar to how, like when I was growing up, you got your diary and it had, like you know, you just had so much space you had to write it and a lot of times in the 1930s and 40s, when they had started really being popular, you know, it was like here's the weather, here's the temperature. I think, especially in New England, it's changed. It's it's Saturday, yes, it's snowing and 32 degrees and so, and so it's coming over for this or that.

Melissa: 29:30

But to see her feelings Through those years I think she was like 20 and she had just, she was going through an illness. She was obviously in these, we were and it's I talked about this in one of the podcasts she you can see her relationship with my grandfather shifting because they had known each other all that time. But it was those little dips into her real life. To me that were the treasures, like the kids Drinking their milk or sleeping in those little baby faces, to be able to go back and look at those like little bits of.

Lauren: 30:04

Everyday. That's kind of what social media has started for, especially even the younger generations. They're using it as an everyday diary and the blogs, the documenting like a morning. You know, I think that's become Like our little journals that they used to keep and I think that's a great thing. I think people, if you do not like, look back on your past and what's what's it like? Why are we taking my photos? Why are we doing? Why are we running stuff down? And yeah, what not? I actually got my, my in-laws it's called story worth for Christmas. So, like, every week they get a prompt and Personally, I wish she had put more photos in the book, but I love that I have those stories to tell my kids. Mm-hmm, but like you know how, like we used to write, like because I write the date and the year that my kids school pictures. Like I get my school, my kids school pictures printed because I think it's adorable.

Lauren: 31:00

I don't care what they wear. I don't care what their parents like but I'm like you know 2000, you know whatever, and like first grade and second grade, and so they can see that progression. But like I'm so I'm a twin and so we have photos of my sister and I next to each other, but like they're, after a while my mom forgot to write who was who.

Lauren: 31:23

So, like, how do you know, I Enjoy, like you know, flipping through photos and like looking on the back and seeing like on Sue, like whatever, like yeah, so I think we don't, we don't have like a lot of people aren't printing photos anymore, which is a shame, but, like I think, if you go to someone's Instagram page or blog or whatever, you kind of see though what's happening in there every day and they live a little caption and yeah, I'm the date, and so so that's one of the projects I want to actually do as a workshop, but it is one of the like easy starter places that I Coach people to get started is like we talked about the picture can tell you so much but then you can also Give so much around that story.

Melissa: 32:10

But you brought up a really good point also about the printing and keeping it on social media, and for me, we had a really interesting talk on our training. I just did the weekend before last with some Genealogists who are documenting and gathering and had talked about is there a way that that I Advised for families to come together and have one spot to be able to add photos or add stories, and they had talked about using Facebook for this. And one of the things I Cautioned people with is only having all of their story on social media and reminding people now from a business perspective. We talk about that all the time like you don't own your followers, they're just there. It's a great way to connect, it's a great way to show, but it's not your platform.

Melissa: 33:00

And same thing with your pictures, with your story. It's wonderful, we can do that, but we really don't know how long it will be there or what could happen that would take it down, and so I I'm always thoughtful of is there somewhere else that we can store this now in this cloud Type of environment? It's very hard for me to even know what that looks like, right, but we were talking about About being thoughtful of that, because one of the women had actually shared how and I don't know if it was her husband who passed or if it was one of her friends Husband had passed and somehow the count got locked immediately and so all before the family could go in and take any kind of photos and memories, it was gone. Yeah, and so you talking about that? I think it would be amazing even for simply starting to go back to that kind of the way the scrapbook used to be, but not so like I mean people that want to do it do all the doodledoodads and everything.

Lauren: 34:01

Yeah, awesome. I feel like there are so many different ways to Like, get your photos off your phone, off your computer. Social media is a great way to show others, like, like. It's become like An email of some sort. Like, you know, everyone gets to see it. But, yeah, facebook could could just shut off any minute. Now, I'm like it. We don't own Facebook, I don't own Instagram, so like, yeah, my, your account could be shut down any minute. So I love external hard drives. I Think everyone needs an external hard drive either for, like, sensitive documents. But all of my photos go on an external hard drive and then I have a backup hard drive. Yeah, and I'm in the business of like my. It's my business, so I need to be prepared. I think a lot of people don't realize that external hard drives fail over time.

Melissa: 36:45

I Continue to update just heard from someone who that happened to a whole trip from Italy is gone because their external hard drive was corrupt. So I think having the two we can also.

Lauren: 36:59

I love a lot of Printing 4x6's and putting them in an album is a lot of work. I have a few different type of storages that I use. So I use like a plastic band and I and I, you know, I Categorize stories, whatever, and I have, and I have all my husband's pictures too, so I have to like make sure that you know they're all in the same place. I have albums that I put stuff in and then I have books. So I have photo books, photo albums that, like you can you know digitally put together, which is great. Like I just did one Um for my mom and dad from our trip to Disney. Like I took everybody's photos, put them in an album and then like put them in a digital album, yeah, and like she'll always have that book. I mean like obviously it can happen, but like if you have a digital, like external hard drive and printed copies, like you'll have both, you have both.

Melissa: 37:51

And yes, anything could happen at any time.

Melissa: 37:53

But yeah, I do love those photo books. Um, my friend did that for me for my 50th birthday too, with all the things that she had taken throughout that time and then other pictures of things, and shared that as a gift, and I think it's, and they're not. They're so Affordable. Now I have to look into you too, how much text you can add with the pictures, because storyworth and those kinds of software things are good, but they do. They are, you know, cost-prevative for some people or a lot of work for some people. They don't want the prompt, like some people want to do it on their own time or their own prompts or whatnot. But there are ways that we can publish, whether it's our photos or our stories. That can be something like that. That is so much cheaper than it ever used to be.

Lauren: 38:39

I actually was writing down how to preserve stories, because I have a a fellow photographer friend. She started incorporating audio and her photo stories and I love that idea and like video is taken off so much that, like, how do you like it's like a holistic memory, like, yeah, like so, yeah, I, I know, I love, but the whole fact of like taking photos or taking video or whatever type of medium To incorporate along with like written stories, I think it's just, it makes the it more powerful. Yeah, I love that.

Melissa: 39:17

Yeah, we'll have to talk because I can see something big coming, that would be fun to do integrate, yeah, um, because I think people love having the community to do it in too, like, I think, um similar to like how the scrapbooking was a big deal to be able to go with your lady friends. You know, for my time when my kids were little, that was very popular.

Melissa: 39:38

Part of it was community of moms, you know especially when your kids are little and you're like I need community and I need Uh, it has to be. You felt like it had to be for me, anyways, a valid purpose. Um, which is stupid, because when you need time to get out, the purpose is so you don't kill.

Lauren: 40:00

I do, I go, you don't go crazy um.

Melissa: 40:03

But thinking about that now, even with I know that part of my mission is to kind of create not just um, not just virtual, but it could be virtual but also that workshop writing in a workshop format Is how a lot of writers write right, when we learn to write and we go through school as writers, there's always a workshop component where you can have the time, or even you know, during writing, um, when you go away and you have the quietness to be able to do a retreat on writing. There's always a component where you can like bounce off people's ideas or sit beside, even if you're never talking about what you're writing. So I could totally see um collaborating at some point. Yeah, I think.

Lauren: 40:46

I think you nailed it on the head. It's that time component that that um Deferred people from doing either putting photos in an album or writing down the stories. I think it's the time piece like, um, my mom actually is really into her genealogy so she's been studying and like getting pictures and names from like weight you know from we're from northern Sicily so like learning about my family stories and then coming over to the us and it's very fascinating. Um, but like, is she gonna write those stories down? Is there a place to write those stories down? Um, you know she's starting to incorporate pictures of these people and like we just realized that like we've been celebrating my great grandmother's birthday All wrong, it's like a month early, oh wow.

Melissa: 41:33

Yeah.

Lauren: 41:34

So it's like but like getting to see like these old pictures, um, it's really, it's really cool. Like my, my oldest, they did. Um, they were learning about immigration last year and so they had to dress up. Like you know, they were from a different country and coming over and they were like you have to bring things in your in your bag, and one of them was a family portrait, and so they all had to print out family portraits of their families. I'm so like it was even important back then, like I was just thinking about like the history, like the history of photography. It's like, why do we take photos of people before they go off to war?

Melissa: 42:09

They're gonna die, yeah yeah, we're gonna see them again. Like that's true, the photos of like I didn't even, oh my gosh, I didn't even think about how big so my youngest is in the air force and for sure it's built into. Each piece of their training is like you finish this, you get a photo. Yeah, they graduated basic training. They're taking a photo, but now they're doing it as a document Of who they are in case. Oh, that's so weird.

Lauren: 42:34

Yeah. So it's well, and I think about it like when do you need photographs? Weddings, funerals, um, usually some big celebration like probably like senior, you know, graduation.

Lauren: 42:46

And one ocean, that's how we I feel like that's how we honor our family. You, you post photos, there's photos everywhere, and so how do we continue like this tradition of like printing out photos? And, um, yeah, like I started, I've started my photo wall, like on our you know walls at home, but like it stopped halfway because it's like what photos do I print out? Like I feel like now it's been very overwhelming of like how many photos do I print? What photos are the most important? Like I think it kind of stops people.

Melissa: 43:20

Like I said, I have like thousands and thousands of photographs like what overwhelm is definitely there, and then the storage of the ones, even if you Change them out Um, it's funny when you were talking about your picture of your sister and yourself that your mom had kept. Um, we did the same with the boys, like I would do five by sevens for myself and five by sevens for my mother-in-law, and I have two boys that are now 20, three he's going to be 24 soon, but I'll go with their current ages, 23 and 26. They're both on the edge of turning another year and I have nephews that are eight and 10 that are like the mini versions of the two of my boys. It's kind of funny, personality wise too. But especially the two younger ones Everyone calls Raleigh is my youngest nephew, benjamin, who's my youngest like everyone.

Melissa: 44:14

My mother-in-law calls them Ben. She took care of like help take care of the kids when I was working, like had them for a few days when my kids were little. She has these guys. We're both live within minutes of their house, so they're both were there, but their necks were similar. Their hair was similar If you're behind them.

Melissa: 44:30

Their personalities were very similar, and so we've been telling Raleigh this as he figures out who he is. He's more of the introvert, and so was Ben when he was a little bit. He doesn't see Ben that way. So when we would talk about things that Ben used to be like, he was like, but now he's gotten more brave or more outgoing or found his things he liked you could see the lights click while we were going through the pictures and we keep them all in the same frame but behind Yep. So we pulled out all the years of the kids and when we got to the one where Ben was the same age as Raleigh is now, his eyes were like oh my God, yeah, he does look like me. And he was like. I think I need to change my middle name to Benjamin.

Lauren: 45:18

I have a similar story. So when I when I showed the picture of my sister and I to my youngest, piper, she looked at it and it was like is that me and Sadie, which is her cousin, and they're 30 days apart in age and so technically as an identical twin, they're like my kids. So she looked at it and she goes is that me and me and Sadie? And I'm like no, that's me and auntie. And she's like oh, like that you can see, yeah, even like the slight differences. So I think it's, I think it's really cool and like talking about like my girls I don't I don't really remember like my mom telling us stories, necessarily about what was going on, or maybe I just wasn't listening Probably the latter. But I always like around the girls birthdays, I always talk about their birth story and how they came out and like what they look like and who held them, and I show them pictures of them and like those are very sacred moments because I documented like my births with both girls and like the first one was kind of traumatic, but like I still have those photos and, to be honest, it took me a really long time to look back and sometimes I even look back at those photos and it brings back like that deep, like either grief or regret or whatever. But I, but that doesn't stop me from telling their stories and like I don't know, like I like I like making sure that they, that they, how much they were loved and who was there, and like just pieces of like different stuff.

Lauren: 46:52

I don't know I was, I was telling my husband about like the questions you were going to ask and it's just like I feel like it's so important about even the people that are in our lives anymore. Like I, my, we had a really our neighbors next door growing up. So they, we were like four when we moved into this, this new home where it was my hometown now, where I graduated in Waterville, and they had just retired, so it was like these retirees right here and then the family of three young children Hold on, like came into this neighborhood and so they're like oh geez. But I have the best memories with these neighbors because they were kind of like our pseudo grandparents, right, and we have photos with them and like whatnot. But like I have one photo of him before he passed away with my daughter and like I like that's the one image that I like, don't want, like to get rid of. I don't want anything to happen to it because, like I'm going to cry, sorry.

Melissa: 48:02

No, that's. It's those important connections of humanity. So, not to put words onto that, but part of why I started doing this was to. There's a quote and it and when I talked about this in my workshop, there's several versions of this and many different, not just the Orthodox religions, but that basically the idea that we live as long as we're remembered.

Lauren: 48:31

It's like that would be Coco.

Melissa: 48:35

Which was about Dia de los Muertos, which is all about that for that, and that is fabulous. That's going to be a whole nother theme that's coming up.

Melissa: 48:43

But I did. I did meet with a whole family and I had been invited on another friend's podcast and into her Facebook group and it turned out that her whole, all her friends and family, are from Mexico. And when I started to talk about my purpose, they're like oh my gosh, we do it with objects and we do it with this, but now we could do the story behind with it, and wouldn't that be so amazing. So, yeah, it's that is, is is an amazing cultural like. Everyone kind of feels that way and for me, not having all of that from my mom or dad, those treasures, I have it. I say this all the time when I, when I get to visit with people that knew my parents, because I lost both of my parents before I even met my husband. So I kind of felt like I always had these three segments of life. I had life with my parents when everything was really normal, like overly normal, crazy normal, and then we lost my mom and we had this little bit of time that was not pleasant, that was all of us grieving together, and then the time after was after we lost my dad too, which was only four years between. But when I can find people, and especially now as an adult, when I can talk to adults that can tell me the adult sides of my parents' stories too from before, it helps me to know them in a different way.

Melissa: 50:04

I didn't know when I was younger. So that's again. We put these stories down. Maybe sometimes they're going to have to be saved till they're old enough, because we don't want to just share the stories that are appropriate for our young ones. We want them to evolve. So I do anyways. That's one of my purposes is because I didn't know my parents as adults except for how I interacted with them as their child. So feeling like I get to meet these adults that tell me little bits and pieces of them helps me know first of all they really did exist. Because that's another weird part of timing when you've lost someone it does. The hurt doesn't go away, but sometimes you start feeling like were they, physically even how did they fit in the world.

Melissa: 50:46

Was it real? Was it just me? And where I don't even live where I grew up, I feel that away a lot. So, yeah, not to go off. But that picture with you and your neighbor shows it happen, brings back all the feelings and it's a treasured Well, in that moment in his life he was sick, he was going through probably dementia.

Lauren: 51:08

He didn't know who he was, and so that to me, that wasn't him. Just seeing the picture reminds me that they got to me and that he was a big. It's the people in our lives that impact us the most that we want our family to remember, and it doesn't have to be family members, it can be neighbors, it could be old high school friends. It could be whatever it is.

Lauren: 51:31

And so I think it's so. Yeah, especially when you lose someone Like that's what you said it's like you have before them and then you have after, and I think a lot of the times, stories can get mushy. This is the word I look for. I think that's the reason why, when family gets together, they retell stories over and over again, because you don't want to forget them, and I mean stories used to be told, you know, like Homer and like.

Lauren: 51:59

Yeah, or old stories and stuff. So it's like so you just tell them over and over again, and I think what needs to happen now is someone starts to read, throw them down, or you hit record, or voice memo or something.

Lauren: 52:10

We got so many easy ways. Exactly you time. Time seems like it goes by really slowly. But like I just realized that like two of my cousins are going to be graduating from college and high school and I'm like, weren't you just two years old, like last year? And like, yeah, my, I have a fifth grader now. Like I remember when she was like you know, it's just, it's my, my oldest, like niece, she's 16. And I still remember her, like eating her breakfast with a spoon.

Melissa: 52:40

Yeah, yeah, I think.

Lauren: 52:41

I'm 12 hours old and yeah, yeah. So it's just like I don't know.

Melissa: 52:47

It's yeah, it's neat, but the parallels definitely of the photography with the oral stories is just so strong that I knew I wanted to have this talk with you. The vulnerabilities again is another similarity of being vulnerable in our story, being vulnerable when we're in our pictures and also recording other people, because I think you do both with your storytelling and your photography.

Lauren: 53:15

I think yeah, I think the bravest thing you can do is to step in front of the camera and I make sure to do it myself, either through self portraits or having someone take photos of us. We just actually had a photographer come to our house. She did a day in the life session yeah, so she document. She was here with us for six hours I think, and just stayed with us, and I think that's helpful in the sense that it's not a half hour photo shoot, an hour photo shoot where you're like standing and smiling, you're like kids are crying and screaming and you know you're making dinner and like so it's like she's just there to capture what's happening. And I think that's just so profound because I can look back and be like oh, like I really did hug my kids.

Lauren: 53:58

I wasn't yelling at them 24, seven or I think that's the biggest misconception I think people have when they, when I want to document their family just as they are, they're like our house is dirty, like that has anything to do with photography. But like what if I'm yelling kids cry? Like they don't, they misbehave. I'm like yes, they do. Like you also see, like moments of love, connection, like quiet moments are so like you don't get a lot of that picture. Yeah, like people. People think that you need to be smiling and happy and you don't even need to be looking at the camera Like, yeah, yeah, just yeah.

Melissa: 54:46

And you were really good at helping. That was one thing, before I go into the questions that we had talked about. But that was one of your gifts, I think also was helping people feel comfortable within that, because that was one of the things that helped me was we turned it from posing right to action and being, and that the more authentic we were having fun sitting having coffee in a coffee shop or just walking along, you know, doing whatever we were doing outside, out and about. Then the pictures that I that are my favorites really, you know came to and its motion and it's looking and it's doing and yeah, I love that you were able to help me even to feel comfortable with what shows motion and not just the usual school picture.

Lauren: 55:37

Put your hands on your lap turn, your being someone who likes to observe people. I feel like if I wasn't a photographer, I'd probably be some type like in sociology or like.

Lauren: 55:46

I really like people like me not being I mean being looking, I like being nosy. So people do things naturally and comfortably and they everyone has their own like unique way of like looking or talking and like when you, when you relax and let that, you let your guard down, you do something that you would normally do, and that's what I'm trying to capture, yeah, and so I make people get out of their brains and into their bodies and kind of just I. That's why I never stopped talking. I make people move, like, and like drinking coffee is something that you normally do. So I try to incorporate that in my sessions, because when you start to think about what's happening, you get very self conscious and you stiffen up and yeah, yeah, so funny.

Melissa: 56:37

So I remember talking about like you doing things and expressions that people normally do. One of the things I remember you doing was you noticed the way I smiled and laughed with my sister, that I crinkled up my nose and you were like, okay, we're going to do this again. Yeah, and you did something. I really liked it. We're going to do that, I'm looking for this, but like, let it happen, naturally, because of course I wasn't going to go. But I remember thinking, oh my gosh, I do that.

Lauren: 57:06

And see, those are the moments that I capture, like the little special moments like my, my youngest. She used to have like a pacifier we call it a pat pat because of the company, but she used to put the pat pat in and then put a pat pat over it and like do, like, do that and I'm like. So I captured that and my oldest curls her hair like me, like we do, like a little stimming, curl and care, and I captured that. That's what I want to remember. It's like, what do you want to remember? Like way off 1215, 20 years from now? That's because like objects are thrown away, usually like I might keep the pat pat. Usually like stuffed animals will get thrown away. Things get thrown away, but you'll have a photo of that.

Lauren: 57:55

Yeah, and it's the same with story right the like, the little things that remind you of who that person was, or if you're writing about yourself, your things, your habits, or that person's habits or no 11, I fell under the trap of, like my life is boring, I have nothing to say and it's okay to take a break from that, but like, realistically, that's what people want to know, like that's why social media is such a big thing. It's like you're connecting with other people and you're listening to their stories and you're feeling something inside and so like you have a moment and so it's the same thing. Everyone, your life isn't boring. I have to get.

Melissa: 58:30

I have to get on more with the storytelling piece of it and be more not worried about it being an edited piece of of my words, you know, yeah, no, I love that. Okay, so we have been chatting for a little bit and I love it and I have two questions that are. They're not rapid fire, because I always prepare people for the game because I know some of them, some podcasts.

Melissa: 58:57

They surprise people with the questions and I literally was on a friend's podcast. I knew what the questions were and I still froze. But I have to, first of all, from me talking about my purpose being to you know, when I didn't have some of my parents stories that I wanted to make sure I did for it better for my boys. But I don't believe that it's unique just because I was so young when my parents passed away. I believe we all have something that we wish we knew, and sometimes the person's there to tell it but they won't right. But is there a story from your past that you don't know or don't have, that you wish you knew?

Lauren: 59:38

It's funny. I was like racking my brain about this. It's like two, it's like two folds, because I feel like I don't have a strong memory. So photos and things written like with my mom. My mom has told us stories over and over again about her family. It always seems to slip away because I don't think that there's enough photographic evidence of it. So I don't remember.

Lauren: 1:00:04

But going back to maternity, I think stuff. I think my mom has one photograph of her pregnant with us, like you know, but I'm not. I'm not entirely sure if I've seen it, I, or if it was my with my older sister, I don't remember. But I feel like that's something that could be really cool, because I hear a lot of moms these days and like, there's no shame if you don't want your photo taken like, it's not a like you should do this because your children will want it. I think it's such a cute and special moment to be like. You know, your mom is so young when she has kids. Yeah, that too, they're so cute and like, even though they probably don't like. I felt like that cow, like I don't know. It's just something special knowing that you're like in your mom.

Melissa: 1:00:51

Yeah, I don't know that's a connection time.

Lauren: 1:00:54

yeah, it shows you and her and in a very obviously on spying time, yeah and knowing that we were twins, like my mom didn't know she was having twins until like 14 days before we were born, oh wow, yeah. So like looking back, I'd be like, did you know? Yeah, but like she was young when her mom died too. So like having more stories about her and like like her grandmother and like their dynamic. Like I come from an Italian family, like like they used to have Sunday dinners and I'm like, do you have pictures of Sunday dinner? Like I think back then they just did portraits of, like Easter portraits and, like you know, christmas portraits and so like just more candid photos of the family around the table or what not.

Melissa: 1:01:44

I love those. Yeah, and is there a story from your life or your, or something that was passed, a story of someone in your life or from your past that you know you definitely want to document and pass along to the future, to your girls and to the future, because I know that some people it's could be aunties or uncles, and some people are doing it for not just their children, but for just the whole sake of preserving I think I'm trying to do a better job of documenting my kids with their grandparents, because I don't have a lot of pictures with my grandparents, yeah, yeah, so like I mean, was it I?

Lauren: 1:02:30

you know, I didn't get to meet my mom's mom. I met my mom's dad, but he died when we were, when we were young. My mom's, my dad's mom, died when we were really young. We have pictures of with them, but like, and then my grandfather, my dad's dad. He died when we were in college or after college, and so, like, we got to really know him, but like you only hear, like, certain snippets of stories at Thanksgiving and Christmas. So it's like you want to know more and like, and you only know them as older people.

Melissa: 1:02:59

Yeah, and you don't know them.

Lauren: 1:03:01

Yeah, you don't know them as like you know dad. You don't know them as like you know younger people. So, yeah, I think, pass it Like making sure that my kids know who their grandparents are, knowing that the inevitable is going to happen someday, hopefully further in the distance. Yeah, yeah, just like when they were little, having stories to tell them and like, yeah, excellent. I know that my husband has really good memories of his grandparents or his grandmother and like grandfather and so like I think, having those stories like continuing on so no one forgets about them, because if you don't tell the stories of people in your past and everything's going to be forgotten.

Melissa: 1:03:43

Pass it. Yeah, that's exactly.

Lauren: 1:03:46

Beautiful. I heard a story the other day about like what do you do with photographs that you don't know the people in? Like you know when you're like that's a great one, yes, yeah.

Lauren: 1:03:56

So like someone was like what do you do with those? So it's like if nothing is written on the photograph and you don't know who the people are. I mean, obviously it's okay to throw it away, but like that's somebody's story, Especially if you're like cleaning out addicts and what not. If like, so it's like like pulling out the albums, Like my mother likes to tell us stories about how her mother likes to pull out the album, like before they were about to leave.

Melissa: 1:04:20

But yeah, let's, let's look at these again.

Lauren: 1:04:24

I want that to continue to happen. I want her to do that more and more.

Melissa: 1:04:27

Yeah that's beautiful. I love that. Well, thank you again so much for taking this time. Can you share with everyone? Because I know that you have some space that you are doing and I know you love doing this and helping people with the pictures and smaller projects and larger projects and I know you you love the family piece of it or the, you know, the marketing part for anyone who needs headshots and things like that. But I know you had some exciting like transitions of of even your own space. So if you could share how people could find you and even on Instagram, which I know is it's more Instagram that you're doing Is it showing up in Facebook and Instagram when you're doing a lot?

Lauren: 1:05:13

of your stuff. Yeah, I have a. I have a Facebook Business page, but I haven't really posted a lot yet yeah, the more active on Instagram.

Lauren: 1:05:23

Yeah, yeah, so my website is Lauren Badwellphotographycom and I actually just got it redesigned, which is really fun. I only took like 10 years. And then I'm most active on Instagram and it's my, my name at Lauren Badwell and I'm on stories and, like you know, kind of document through my day and jam, jam time will start December 1st. The admin calendar is actually already in my closet. I'm like pretending it's not there, so don't open it up, but yeah, so I am hoping to start like an email list and like like you've inspired me to like start telling stories again.

Lauren: 1:06:03

But, like you said, I do have this new space, so I I'm working with somebody else in a space and so I have a studio space with like backdrops and very simple, and so I'm helping, you know, headshots, portraits, like making content for other people. That's a big bulk of what I do now because, like with branding, and I like to help people you know, tell their stories by incorporating small pieces of content. But I also like the simple portraits now and so that's a nice space to do that with, like mom and dad and little family portraits and whatnot. I love it.

Melissa: 1:06:39

Yeah, thank you. This was a wonderful, and thank you everyone who joined us today. You'll be able to find this on YouTube, on my YouTube channel, and also it will be on our usual podcast. So thank you again, lauren, for joining us today.

Lauren: 1:07:00

I love that you're you're doing this. I love that you're trying to preserve stories for the future.

Melissa: 1:07:05

Thank you so much and we're kind of in it together A similar, similar path. Thanks, ken, you're welcome. Thank you, wasn't that a fun episode. I enjoyed our conversation so much and if you would like to continue our conversation, be sure to follow this podcast and share with friends. This helps share the mission of preserving the past with stories. Want more tips, tools and inspiration? Head over to Melissa and kitchencom and, as always, let's get writing your powerful personal stories.