#30: Honoring Our Connections: Giving The Gift of Personal Stories

Have you ever considered how powerful the gift of a personalized story could be to the recipient? Join me, Melissa Ann Kitchen, on a heartfelt expedition as we explore the craft of turning personal narratives into timeless tributes. In this episode, we'll navigate through five creative methods to document  shared histories, ensuring the cherished moments with loved ones are immortalized. By writing and then gifting our shared stories we celebrate the nuances of life and the profound connections that shape our relationships.

As we reminisce about our beloved family and friends, we find that their characteristics, like the humor and resilience found in my brother, become integral threads in the tapestry of our own legacies. The stories we tell, such as the serendipitous meeting with my friend Michelle, are not just passing tales but pillars of our personal history. Together, we'll examine how crafting an acrostic poem or reflecting on shared moments can be a testament to the impact someone has had on our lives. Every narrative is an opportunity to honor those who have influenced us and to recognize the lasting imprint they have made on the world.

Embark with me on this narrative journey as we embrace the role of storytellers in preserving collective pasts. By documenting our experiences, we connect with our roots, enrich our present, and weave threads of wisdom for the future. As you listen, I hope you're inspired to pick up the pen—or keyboard—and join our mission of keeping personal stories alive. By sharing these narratives, we celebrate the legacies of those who have touched our hearts and ensure that their memories continue to inspire generations to come ... and that, my friend, is a priceless gift!

This group is for people who are in the process of writing their own personal stories to preserve their past for their future. It’s a place to come for story writing inspiration, weekly writing-related events and memes, and continued support from me and the other members.

Join like-minded people and get your stories down on paper for your future generations!

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

How often do you tend to take the time to clearly share with others how much they mean to you? Do you regularly share when they have made an impact on your life? Do you express gratitude after special moments that you've shared with them or lessons and advice that they passed along that made a big impact on you? How would it feel to receive a written account if you had done something that touched another person in a way that made a positive impact on their life? Wouldn't that be a priceless gift? Well, on today's podcast, we're going to be talking about five ways to write stories that can be gifted, and they're going to be priceless gifts that you can pass along. So why don't you join me now and let's take a listen? Welcome to the Preserve your Past podcast, where we'll explore all things related to the creative process of writing your stories for future generations. I'm your host, melissa Ann Kitcher, author, teacher, speaker and coach. I believe that your personal history is a priceless gift for family, friends and generations to come, whether you consider yourself a writer or not. We are discussing the topics that help with every step of the process, like how to mind for the juiciest story ideas or how to refine them into polished final drafts you'll be proud to share. Let's face it sure your stories can be overwhelming, but I've got you covered. We all have a lifetime of memories to share, so why not save yours to pass along? Let me help you leave your lasting legacy. Hi, my friend, and welcome back to the Preserve your Past podcast.

Speaker 1: 1:57

I'm your host, melissa Ann Kitchen, and today we are going to be talking about the gift of story, giving the gift of story, while January is not only the beginning of the year, it's also my birthday month. In this post, or this episode, we're going to be sharing all the ways that I think you can honor others with a gift of story. We talked about this in our January story goal setting episode, which you can find in the show notes, that it would be nice to write a story for birthday gifts for your loved ones. We were setting, like looking ahead at the months and thinking about who you wanted to do this for. Today, I'm going to give you some ideas that you can use to begin writing those stories for them. Before we get into those five ideas, I want you to first of all remember that as we do this, you're going to be going through the steps that I always talk about, which, first of all, is thinking about your audience, right, thinking about your subject and taking time to really center in and think about them. While you're doing this, in each of the steps and each of the ways, I'm going to share some questions. I'm going to guide you through doing that. I'm also going to show an example from my own life, but I do invite you to head over to the blog at Melissa and kitchencom. Head over to the blog and you'll see the written steps, because I think this is going to be an episode where not only are you going to want to listen and we'll have a conversation and be inspired, but if you want to then do any of these yourself, you don't have to take notes because these questions that I'm going to be sharing will be linked in the show notes and head. It will be part of the blog. I welcome you to for the podcast, to sit, listen through each one, join me on this journey, be inspired and then, when you're ready to take action, you'll have this episode as well as the blog notes that will tell you all the questions that we're going to go through.

Speaker 1: 4:21

So let's go through Again. I have five ideas and actually some of them can be even shifted to make even more and their ideas that can be used once per person. Or you might decide to do a collection for a person, you might decide to do the same one for everyone, or you may decide that, depending on that person, that story needs to be a little bit different. So I invite, as always, your creativity. I invite you to utilize these questions and steps with whatever way matches your purpose. We always talk about sitting down and thinking about your purpose, your audience and, of course, your subject. So let's get it started looking at the five ideas that I have proposed for you.

Speaker 1: 5:09

So the first story that you could write for someone as a gift is a story of a special moment that you shared, that you both shared together, so a memory of a time that you shared together. And when you're thinking about this again, I want you to get really thoughtful, mindful, pause in that moment, take some quiet time, like I always say in all of my writing guidance, like take some time to really pause and think about what it felt like, what it looked like, what it smelled like, using your senses right, we talked about that in our last episode. Using your five senses, using adjectives to describe what it felt like to be in that moment. So I want you to really think about it ahead, because as you get writing, I want that story to bring both of you back to the moment it happened, to feel like you're bringing that moment back to life. So include details, include senses and really work towards bringing the moment back to life, and then you can share, in addition to the actual memory and moment, be sure to share what it meant to you, share why it was important to you, share how it touched you, how it might have changed. You did something shift because of this that you would not have had happen if it wasn't for that moment. So I would like to share an example from my life and it's funny because as I do this, I thought okay, if my family and friends are listening to this episode, I know there's going to be people that are going to be thinking oh boy, she didn't share one of me. So I say to those of you who are there message me, I will definitely be doing more episodes with examples and you'll get your story. So the first one of a moment shared, the first thing that came up to my memory was a memory I shared with my uncle, gary.

Speaker 1: 7:19

Now, this was the early 1990s and I had lost my dad. Of course my mom was a little bit before that, but it recently had lost my father. I was working for the summer I graduated from college and was having trouble finding a teaching job and so that summer I had actually been working on Cape Cod where I grew up and was doing the job search and had come across through my boyfriend husband at the time that Clark County School District was looking for teachers, and that's in Las Vegas and coming from Massachusetts, new England area. In the early 90s. That was not something that was necessarily like in the cards, in the plan, not some place where I had been before, not some place that my family had family or even like we talked about it as a place to go to. But everything was booming, pasta living was really good and they were hiring like 800 teachers that year. It turned out through the 90s into the early 2000s they were hiring about a thousand a year for a very long time through that growth spurt. So when my husband and I decided this was a possibility I had found and it's funny because I tell this story about how I went to Framingham state for teaching and I went to the.

Speaker 1: 8:46

This was the 90s, 1993, summer of 93, and I had to go to the school and open up a book of what the job postings were in the career service center, because there was not anything online at the time. So I drove up, I went into the career center, I found that they were hiring. So that's kind of the beginning of the memory. But then I started doing the application process and doing all that and then got the call and a phone interview but needed to do an in-person interview. And this is where the story with my uncle, gary, and the moment that was shared, comes into play, because there's a couple of pieces to this. So the first one was he was a food broker and so he traveled and did food conventions and things like that at the convention center often and all over the country, and so at that time Las Vegas was really known. Their convention center was a place where many of those types of events were held. So he was actually going to be going out there at a similar time when I needed to schedule my first interview, in-person interview. So we talked and we worked it out that we were gonna meet on the way, because actually I was.

Speaker 1: 10:07

He was flying from somewhere else and so started off from my spot. He started from another spot. We kind of met at one of the hubs and then flew the rest of the way together. He had his hotel was at one of the historic ones I believe it was the Sands and mine was at the Imperial Palace, which was not fancy at the time. I don't even know. I should have done fact checking before I did this to see whether it still exists. But if it does, I can't imagine because it was not, it was in my budget, let's just say so.

Speaker 1: 10:42

He and I flew out and I wanna say he might've even helped me with points for the flight, but it was also a part of I had never flown that much before that. I had someone traveling with me, so like we got there together. He had rented a car, I didn't have to worry about all the how-to's and I had someone there with me and that was really important. Now the memory, the moment, that was hysterical and kind of burned into both of our memories. So this would not even be something that he didn't remember.

Speaker 1: 11:15

My room at this hotel was so bad. Like I remember going up, taking the elevator, going down a long hall, another hall, another hall, feeling like I could not have been in the more like desolate end of the world type room, staring out my window at another brick wall, like it was just bad and I didn't feel safe. I felt uncomfortable. I was young and it was. I didn't do a lot of traveling, but it just didn't feel comfortable in my.

Speaker 1: 11:44

So when we had started speaking to get ready for doing dinner together, he had mentioned that he had the opposite experience and when he checked into his hotel, he was able to get bumped up to a suite and it was one of the high end suites Like I don't know if it was the presidential suite, I don't remember which suite Like it had a fancy name, like that. It was amazing. And so he said I have an extra room. Would you want to just come here and stay here? And they had like a living room with a couch that pulled out and it might have even had an extra bedroom. But so I packed up my things and went over to his hotel and at one point when we were doing all that and I was like standing there with him getting ready to go up to the room I think maybe we were checking in to get me another key or something and he introduced me as his niece and then I was his niece and I was there and I was going to come and stay in the room with him and it was just the funniest story because here we are in Las Vegas, in this fancy hotel, and he's introducing me as his niece while he's on a conference and we were like, no, really, I'm his niece, for those of you who know.

Speaker 1: 13:00

You know, but we went up to his suite and, man, it was one of my most favorite experiences because it was like a time capsule out of history and I swear that Frank Sinatra probably stayed in this suite because it was that it was right out of a movie from the Rat Pack. So it was perfectly or I should say Rat Pack I don't even know anymore which one switched from all the generations of them, but perfectly furnished could have been in a Frank Sinatra movie. Maybe there was a pool out the back that was private to, that had a kitchen, had a living room. It was just beautifully furnished, definitely dated even for the 90s, but in a really cool way Cause I love that stuff in perfect condition, not dated like worn down dated, it was like a movie set. So that was an amazing experience.

Speaker 1: 13:53

That was pre-phone, so I could not get pictures of this right. It was smartphones didn't exist, I didn't have a camera with me. But the moment that was really sealed the deal was him having to get me a key and introducing me as his niece. So that was our joke through the whole thing. When we went out to eat, I was introduced as his niece to the servers and we just laughed a lot because that was kind of an inside joke. So that is an example of a special moment that we both shared, including details that could bring it back to life.

Speaker 1: 14:28

I did some backstories of why I was there. Right, if I was writing this, I might describe what it felt like in that lobby and coming up to the front desk and feeling like I was just relieved that I wasn't gonna have to be by myself, and then even the moment we walked into the room and I was awed by it. So I could definitely bring that story to life a little bit more. But part of what I would say to you is that last question was why was it so important to me and for if Uncle Larry is listening which I know he does occasionally listen to this podcast the whole thing of that experience, that trip that meant so much to me, I'm gonna start getting choked up.

Speaker 1: 15:14

Well, that's one moment that has to bring us both back to that time period. That was only a couple of years after my father had been gone and it was my first big out of college, out into the real world step. And I don't know that it would have been as easy to go across the country from New England and do that interview if I didn't have him there. And one thing I remember feeling was that, even though he wasn't my dad and he had his own kids, it was the closest that I would feel of that unconditional support that I really treasure from my aunts and uncles, because my aunt was is my aunts. All were like that to me. Also. There's been moments with them where they've really stepped up and we had special moments that I'm thinking, one too that I have to share with my auntie, kristen, but she knows what the story is. That was a good story, so we'll share that at some point. But yeah, it meant a lot to me because I felt supported, I felt loved, I didn't feel like I was by myself. So that's a moment didn't mean to get that. I was going for the funny part of here's my niece.

Speaker 1: 16:35

But you come up with why is it important to you? And you go back in time and sometimes the stories get you in the gut and that's a good story. So we'll definitely wanna write about that. And having my kids know that story and know my uncle better and know my starting out story better is also why I love preserving the stories, because I think, while this would be an amazing gift for him, his family and my family to see it also and share, like going back in time when I was, from now my sons are actually older than I was then, which is crazy. My oldest son is older than I was then. My youngest is is going to be right about the same age, so very weird. So that's the first thought Share a story of a special moment.

Speaker 1: 17:26

The next idea that I have for you and hopefully I don't remember now if this one's gonna get me in the gut too, because I do have some stories I'm sharing I'm gonna share a story of a lesson. So this is your number two is to think of a lesson that you learned from someone and share that story with them. So what was the lesson? First of all, how was it passed along? You know, was it something that they clearly stated and showed you? Was it something you observed in them? Was it due to a conversation? And then, how did you take what you observed or what you learned into your own life? What growth and what goodness came from it? And then even, have you passed it along Again?

Speaker 1: 18:12

I suggest you really take a moment, think about the lesson I want you, when you're doing your pre-writing, to almost think about. You're going to stop and be quiet because you want to kind of see that initial idea, all the ripples that come out of it right, all of the pieces that affected it, all of the feelings that were felt, so that you can write about it in a way that feels like you're there. And maybe, if it's a lesson and not an actual event that happened, it might be written differently, but oftentimes it's nice to think of the moment, even in the lesson story, so that that person and you have like an anchor of, maybe, when you remember it being passed along, or an example of you, you know taking it to the next step. So this example that I'm sharing is actually and it's funny because I have examples from lots of different people of lessons learned that I've shared in some of my workshops and I've not shared this lesson learned, but as I was prepping for this podcast, this memory just popped into my head as one that really is making its comeback again in my life, something that I don't do, naturally, from my own perspective, but yet is super important to who I am as a person.

Speaker 1: 21:33

And this is about my sister. The lesson she taught me was that there is always a way that you can add beauty to your surroundings, to an event, to how you're dressed, to any situation, and it can be a simple beauty and thinking about the experience and not just doing something to get it done, not just purchasing something that's just gonna suffice, and not just settling for something that's just well, that will work, but I'm not gonna want to look at. It was a lesson that I learned and it was, and I know exactly when I learned it. So she and I had different experiences after everything with our parents happened and we're five years apart, so we were at different stages in our life, often when we were going through these things and I talked about interviewing in Las Vegas and I did get the job and I lived out there for six years until our first son was born and realized from exactly what I mentioned about my aunts and uncles and my even my in-laws being such an important piece to it.

Speaker 1: 22:55

But honestly, I don't know that I would have been able to get through the loss of my parents if I didn't have aunts and uncles that I felt like I knew and they knew me and they had me right, that they loved me like that. Strangers or people you see ever so often you're not gonna necessarily feel that way and so when my son was born, I wanted to come back so that my son could have that. I wanted him to know my sister and my brother and Mark's sisters and brothers and my in-laws, his grandparents. I wanted him to know them so well that if something did happen which unfortunately, when you've gone through loss, you're kind of going through the rest of your life like if this happens again, because losing two parents is kind of another way of thinking it took me a very long time to think how long am I gonna be with my boys, because when you have it happen at different occasions more than once, it's hard not to think that way. So coming home and having him be really close with the family was important and when we came back I was in the thick of a toddler and we had found out I was expecting. So really like.

Speaker 1: 24:04

I came back in the summer before my second son was born. I had a two and a half year old toddler and I was eight months pregnant and life was overwhelming Moving the whole house and finding another house and finding a new job and starting back on the pay right. Starting a new job, not making as much money maybe Mark starting a new job, he definitely wasn't making as much money. So you're feeling frugal, you're feeling tired, you're feeling overwhelmed and you're feeling as a new parent. You're there to keep your kids alive and just do the things that got to get done being creative, seeking the beauty, setting the scene, doing the things that really could allow me to relax and feel comforted in my environments.

Speaker 1: 25:01

I was not doing any of that and because I was part of a family, I was kind of often putting other people's opinions, even if I didn't even know if they had opinions about like colors and design and things like that. I was trying to find my own, but also I was worried about spending money. I was worried about things being tough for the two little boys, and so I definitely did not purchase items that I felt supported me or were a reflection of me, and so one of the lessons that I learned from my sister was that I could infuse beauty, infuse nature, infuse an experience of specialness into my daily life. Now I was really good at doing the way of adding fun and playfulness and joy and magic to my children's experiences, but I wasn't necessarily thinking about what would be a great experience for me.

Speaker 1: 26:09

So I remember one of the things was coming back and going to my sister's one of her early apartments and just because she had this beautiful sheep kind of well, I don't even know what it was, but a Sherpa type white rug fluff that was on her floor and Benny was a baby at the time and so we would go and the kids would like love hanging out on this little fluffy rug and it was gorgeous. It was beautiful and she had pretty glasses that were from collected around, but her apartment was bright and things were very simply put but very nice and I just felt like I was living in this zone of plastic toys and that I didn't really ever put much intention in my space, and it was that apartment of hers and simple things that she did that I remember thinking, oh, that could make my space feel this way. Or, oh, I should think about this because if I moved this or got rid of this, or even as I went to replace things, to think I don't want to settle for that, I want this one because this is the idea, this is the mood that I want, knowing that as I was growing up, fashion, interior design were hobbies of mine, like I was obsessed with fashion design and even interior design and actually creating the houses through one of our classes, so like architectural design. But I wasn't honoring any of that in my daily life. All of my life had to do with being a teacher and kid friendly and being a mom and my house being kid friendly. So everything was all those plastic primary colors, nothing to do with me. And so, knowing that there was ways I could set these little moods, whether it was listening to music, whether it was lighting a candle that smelled wonderful or essential oils before essential oils were the thing she really taught me how to add in beauty and create comfort and experience, and she was doing that before she. Even that was her job to do. So it's really interesting to see where she is now in her life and to see how she made her life really about that. So, if you're listening, allie, thank you for that. Lesson.

Speaker 1: 28:38

Story type number three is to think about a characteristic of the person that you're writing the story for, that you treasure Thinking about this. What is a better way to show someone that you honor them, that you see them, than speaking to one of their characteristics and then why you appreciate it, because there's nothing more amazing than having someone see you for who you are and acknowledge that. So I want you to think about what is the characteristic that clearly comes to mind when you think of this person. I want you to think about examples of when this characteristic was demonstrated to you and why is it so important to you, to others that they know. So why do other people think it's important? Also, why is it important to the world and what has taught you about yourself? So as you look at this characteristic in them, you're then seeing how it and again, ripple effect of that characteristic, what it means to you, what do you observe, and how it means to others, and even, how does it make the world a better place? Right, who wouldn't love a story about them, knowing that someone saw them like that and then maybe something it taught you about yourself?

Speaker 1: 30:02

Day's example, for that that I have is actually going to be a story about my brother, and the characteristics that I treasure in him are his creativity, his sensitivity, his kindness and his integrity. And I know I said a characteristic, but I'm doing a few, because how these work together make him an amazing, one-of-a-kind, amazing soul. And when you are all of those characteristics, sometimes I think as a creative, it's hard. You're creating. It's creation is messy. Kindness and empathy is messy. When you're sensitive, right, being in integrity and being who you are, can sometimes feel uncomfortable, but anyone that knows him knows that those are all the reasons why we love him, and one of the stories that I have to show something about one of those characteristics, which is really his kindness and his integrity of just being who he is and being thoughtful, is when he had suffered an aortic dissection.

Speaker 1: 31:20

We didn't know if he was going to make it. It was crazy. He wasn't very old and he was in the hospital, in the cardiac ICU, and they were starting to be able to bring him back, and the neurologists weren't sure how his brain was going to be functioning, whether he was going to have his personality back, whether he was going to be him, have any language movement, we didn't know. So they had done the surgery. It's now time to kind of take him back into the world, and there was two parts of that story that were just so taught, actually three. So one of the first things that came up for me was that even through it, all the nurses adored him even before he got transferred out. So this was still the cardiac ICU before he went to the regular ICU, which means it was days after he had just been woken up, and that day later he's pleased and thank you and appreciative and so kind to these nurses, even though he doesn't hardly know who he is, where he is, why he's there. And it just goes to show you that integrity and kindness part, because it's in him to be that way when he doesn't even have the definition of what's going on or who he is in relation to the world. The other piece that came out of that was his humor, which I put kindness, but he does have the integrity part is also his sense of humor, because he does not beat around the bush, he says it like he thinks but in an amazingly true kind of way.

Speaker 1: 32:59

But there was a story because he was super thirsty after all of that and he had been intubated and when they finally were able to free him from the air tube and all that, his throat was dry and he really wanted something to drink and it was this orange coolata that he was craving. And I remember we're standing and kind of giving him little bits of ice chips because that's all they were able to give him or they were letting him have, I think, with a little straw, like some ginger ale or something, water or ginger ale, I don't remember. But I was holding the cup and I give him, thinking I'm going to only let him get a sip and then he'd like grab the cup. But the part that was really we knew he was going to be OK is when the neurologist came in with a team of other observers to ask some questions they were definitely doing a check and asked him a few questions and as they came in the room they said, introduce themself. And can I ask you a few questions?

Speaker 1: 34:00

And in true, tidy, sarcastic but yet historical way, he just looked at the doctor and was like, if you don't have orange, coolata or whatever it was the drink that he wanted, then you can just turn around and his sarcasm knowing that little piece of humor was there just days after he had had this event where he was in a coma and we didn't know he was going to live, was that characteristic that I was like, oh my gosh, that's him and it's his integrity. It's him being him saying what's on his mind in a loving and a funny way A little. You know that sarcasm is there as a you know was a joke, but it also was him. Like that word integrity comes from it, because it's the characteristic that I think of him and I know that he's always going to be him and I know that his friends love that about him and rely on that about him and he would do anything for anyone. His heart is, his heart is, was not the problem. The problem was his aorta, but I guess that might be part of his heart, but his heart actually is, is always been amazing for others and I know that his friends and family, and everyone sees him that way, as a special personality, because he has not ever tried to be who he is not. So, tati, that's a story of a characteristic of yours that I treasure. Who thought Okay, we're getting a little longer here, so I have two more, but I I really thank you all for coming on this journey with me today.

Speaker 1: 35:49

So number four for you all, sharing a version of a how we met story. So this is a great birthday story how did we meet you? Going back in time, sharing your side of when you met the person, how you met the person, making sure to add descriptors, specific details, answering who, what, where, when, why, like where were we, what was happening? You know when was it, why and who. This is another one where you want to make sure you're using adjectives and adverbs because you want to bring back the moment to life.

Speaker 1: 36:30

This story that I first comes to mind, aside from, like, everyone has their how you met your partner story, right, or a boyfriend, or you know that kind of thing. Or when you met your children for the first time in the hospital. But my fun how I met you story is actually my friend, michelle, who I am going to be spending my birthday weekend with next weekend and we haven't spent a ton of time together the way we did when we met. So we're actually going to be kind of reenacting. We're going to be reenacting our how we met story, but this is how. This is my side of the story. So again, I'm in Las Vegas. It is now probably 95, 96. We've been there for a little bit and we've been there for just a little bit.

Speaker 1: 37:23

But I was at a second school that I worked at and she was a third grade teacher and I was the ESL bilingual teacher and I was in the lounge talking to somebody and they, you know, found out where I was from and they said, oh my gosh, you need to go meet Michelle. She, she's from Massachusetts also, she loves the Patriots and she, likes, you know, she sends the kids out to the bubbler. And they were, you know, talking about her accent and being a Massachusetts person and how we needed to meet up. And so I remember, you know, introducing myself kind of awkwardly, like when someone tries to set you up and you're like she might not want to be my friend, but hi, I'm Melissa in Massachusetts, and blah, blah, blah.

Speaker 1: 38:08

But we hit it off and this was in the early nineties when the Patriots were starting to kind of come back again a little bit. Drew Bledsoe was the quarterback. They did get to a Super Bowl during that time. They did not do well at the Super Bowl. That Super Bowl actually is the day I brought my son Curtis home from the hospital, but she and I in that time period would go out on Sundays and watch the Patriots game at one of the Patriots bars, because in Las Vegas everyone's from somewhere else and so you can find pretty much any city, any region in a restaurant or a sports pub somewhere and each team had its own place to show up. And there was a place that always had the Patriots game on on the Sundays and we would go and have our bloody Marys and watch the games together almost every single Sunday. And it's three hours different, so it was earlier in the morning there and you know the one o'clock games are earlier. The four o'clock games were earlier. It made football way more accessible, so we were having a blast watching that. So that will be something I will definitely post in some of my socials when she and I get to reenact the Sunday morning Bloody Mary, although the Patriots will not be playing because they're not at it anymore, but that's definitely.

Speaker 1: 39:33

I have details of going up and seeing her for the first time. I remember she and I can like bring up the memories. I even remember the bar that we were at. You know where we would sit other teachers who were from other states, knowing that we were Patriots fans, and having bets with us. Funny, one of them was the Lions fan and yeah, he lost the bet, but now they're. They're doing well, so we'll see. So that's number four, your how we met story.

Speaker 1: 40:05

The fifth and final one that I want to share with you as an idea for a story to gift, if you want to keep it simple, and you know, writing a story or coming up with a memory or something seems to be a challenge. I'm going to take you back to what my kids in school, I used to have them do, and also what we would do with my boys for cards for, like the grandparents, for aunts and uncles, and that is to write an acrostic poem. So an acrostic, acrostic poem is a poem with sentences, words that start with or involve somehow in them a letter from the name of the person or whatever the word is. That's your theme. So for this birthday gift, I would have you start by writing the letters of the name of the person down the left side of the paper and then for each of the letters you're going to think of a memory. This is where you could actually take any of the ones we talked up before a memory, a moment, a characteristic and something you shared together any of that and write down a little bullet, a sentence. It can rhyme, it doesn't need to rhyme, but using that left side of the paper as a prompt to describe, honor or even roast, your birthday story subject. You can even look for previous ideas again, like I said, from those above ones, and pull those into your sentences that you're going to use together.

Speaker 1: 41:51

So for each letter, for example, you could come up with a letter of their name and then a lesson or a characteristic, depending on the letters that are in their name. So, for example, if you were writing one for Melissa, you would write the name Melissa down and then, with M, thinking of a characteristic that goes along with me, that could be written there. Or like if I was talking about my sister Alison, if I went with A, I could come up with a characteristic or a sentence about something we did together for all the letters of her first name. So that's the fifth one. So let's just review these. So the first idea that I shared was to share a story of a special moment that you both shared. Number two was share a story of a lesson that you learned from the person. Number three was a characteristic of theirs that you treasure. Number four was the version of the how we met story. Number five is the acrostic poem with the letters of their name.

Speaker 1: 43:06

Whichever one you choose, the message that I would leave you with is to take your time and ground and connect to the story subject, so to that person, and let your appreciation, let your love, let your feelings for them sink in, before writing, and really write from your heart, keeping sight of the purpose and writing in your own voice, and enjoy the process. So this can be a simple process or it can be complex, if you want to do a collection, or you want to do something very detailed, or if you're planning on putting it into a book format. Whatever it is, you are the author and you get to choose, but definitely put in the intention, give yourself a moment to be present, think of the person, think of the story topic and be present with that and, most of all, have fun with the process. So you're giving one of the greatest gifts a person can give. You're giving them the gift of acknowledgement, appreciation, of being seen and of love. So any effort you can put into that will make that even better.

Speaker 1: 44:32

Thank you so much for joining today. Please do me a favor, and, wherever you are listening to this podcast, if you could follow the podcast and you'll get all the episodes, share the podcast with those you know who would love to preserve their memories and their stories of loved ones. And also, I invite you to head over to our YouTube channel, because I am now posting recordings and videos of these podcasts over on YouTube, and if you go over to YouTube and subscribe to that channel, you'll get those there too, and some of them are going to be very much visually integrated, right? So the interview specifically, but some of the other ones, will have some slides, some prompts, and we might do that. And then, remember, you can find all of these tips that I shared today over at Melissa and kitchencom on the blog.

Speaker 1: 45:31

So until next time, everyone here's to preserving your past and sharing your stories. Wasn't that a fun episode. I enjoyed our conversation so much and if you would like to continue our conversation, be sure to follow this podcast and share with friends. This helped share the mission of preserving the past with stories. Want more tips, tools and inspiration? Head over to Melissa and kitchencom and, as always, let's get writing your powerful personal stories.