Review #35 - Time for some Coffee & Cigarettes with Cellarmaker Brewing Company
May 24, 2024Season 3
Alec, Brian, and Chad
On today's review, Alec and Chad reap the karma from subjecting Brian to the Pickle Agony. We dive ashtray-first into Cellarmaker Brewing Company's Coffee and Cigarettes, a tasty smoked coffee porter that sent a couple of the crew for a loop. We still manage to chat about NASCAR a bit and a have a lively discussion about rectangular pizza.
If you'd like to reach out to the American Beer Review LIVE! crew to give us a beer suggestion or to tell us we suck, you can reach us on any of our socials (in order of how often we check it).
On today's review, Alec and Chad reap the karma from subjecting Brian to the Pickle Agony. We dive ashtray-first into Cellarmaker Brewing Company's Coffee and Cigarettes, a tasty smoked coffee porter that sent a couple of the crew for a loop. We still manage to chat about NASCAR a bit and a have a lively discussion about rectangular pizza.
If you'd like to reach out to the American Beer Review LIVE! crew to give us a beer suggestion or to tell us we suck, you can reach us on any of our socials (in order of how often we check it).
Don't give it to them. Dad's wearing a Larson shirt, dega is over.
Speaker 4:
Congratulations, mr Riddick. Yeah, well, I know, not related to the Chronicles of Riddick Spelled totally different too. Yeah, nerd stuff.
Speaker 3:
Welcome to another episode of the American Beer Review Podcast.
Speaker 4:
Good times with good friends requires good beer. Lucky for us, we know how to pick all three.
Speaker 2:
We're a group of friends who grew up in the Pacific Northwest, giving us a jump start on our craft beer journey.
Speaker 3:
Join us today. While, brian, I pride myself on not getting to know other people, so do not put that on me.
Speaker 2:
Alec. So the bananas, up until like the 60s, were an entirely different species of banana.
Speaker 4:
And Chad. It hit me like a beck and bob.
Speaker 3:
Review some beer, talk about beer topics and whatever else comes up. We invite you to pour yourself a drink and hang out with us.
Speaker 2:
So, anyways, what, what we drink today?
Speaker 4:
we've, we've had. We've had one today, so we're gonna end our day with some coffee and cigarettes.
Speaker 2:
A smoked porter from cellar maker brewing company a plus transition folks yeah, a lightly smoked coffee porter made with a touch of german beechwood smoked malt as well as high quality english malts to create a chocolatey roasty base beer. And then add two pounds of cyclas colombian finca, la grande coffee per barrel for an intense but refined coffee character. And then cigarette ash from our head brewer while he is making it.
Speaker 4:
Wait, weird beer ingredients.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, no, that last part wasn't real. And after the coffee, Good Ben. No cigarettes in this beer.
Speaker 4:
Yet, yet.
Speaker 2:
Alright, let's pour this in. Although cigarettes are technically not food grade, food's safe, the cigarettes the ash. So if you take a food safety course, you're not allowed to smoke in the kitchen, but it's not because of the cigarette, it's because of your saliva, and if you're smoking you're touching your mouth and then preparing food, not because nobody wants their food to smell.
Speaker 1:
If you just hold it and never touch it with your hand. You're good, I guess I'm not gonna try it. They have an imperial wow, they have an imperial version of this. And they have a mocha and cigarettes latte and cigarettes okayte, and.
Speaker 4:
Cigarettes, okay Learning lots of nifty factoids today for future Jeopardy appearance.
Speaker 1:
Double Coffee.
Speaker 4:
Imperial Coffee and Cigarettes. Oh yeah, that's a smoke porter right there.
Speaker 1:
Smoke porter with coffee. Yeah, smoke is not bad. It's a light on the smoke, though, like that's a good. It's not overly, like it's not overpowering, it's not like kind of pungent. I'm not mad about that, just aroma-wise.
Speaker 2:
Okay, you ever smoked a cigarette yeah, depends on who's asking okay, you're thinking the same thing.
Speaker 4:
I am yep what?
Speaker 2:
that's, yeah, it's the mouthful of taste of just finishing a cigarette.
Speaker 4:
Yeah.
Speaker 2:
Cigarette and a cup of coffee is what that is right there, I didn't assume that that's where they're going for.
Speaker 4:
Yeah. But, that's impressive. That's impressive.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, I mean it's fine. What's the APV on this bad boy? 7.7. Okay.
Speaker 4:
How they got that ashtray. I didn't want to say it, but yeah, there's an ashtray, umami to this. I don't break that word out lightly. Yes, you do, you break it out anytime you can's ripping heaters denny's at 3 am in the morning.
Speaker 1:
Yes, yeah yeah, god see, and maybe I just am not early 20s. You're invincible, yeah I uh yeah, I don't obviously get that p.
Speaker 4:
We're having PTSD right here we're having glory days, playing in the background. It's fine, that is something that is impressive. That's what that is.
Speaker 2:
And I 100% was not expecting that.
Speaker 1:
See, and I'm getting more, just like a general smoke yeah.
Speaker 4:
No man, that yeah no this is. Hey, guess what? The bowling alley is the only place in town that's open to serve beer right now.
Speaker 1:
That's the night we're kind of having, yeah, and I'm not getting that as much, but I still think it's a really well done beer. It's the. I think the interesting part is calling it a porter. It definitely is a lighter body to me, not like your big barrel stout. Obviously it's not a barrel, it's just not a double or anything. But like you're going back for more, I mean I'm not if you already bought the pack I'm not mad about it finished it.
Speaker 4:
What's gonna happen when I burn this one because there's an extra one in the fridge to?
Speaker 1:
burn.
Speaker 4:
Oh, I was just yeah because, yeah, it's pretty god yeah you probably should do that, god oh, jesus no, I'm not mad about it this is transcendent.
Speaker 1:
I'm not mad about it.
Speaker 2:
I'm not getting the like, not mad about it, but this is buck wild.
Speaker 1:
I'm not getting as hyped about it as somebody.
Speaker 4:
This is f***ing nutty.
Speaker 1:
Here you pass me that Top off. Maybe I have to look at this too. Alright, so Also, cellar Maker is A new brewery to us.
Speaker 4:
Hats off to the generate who got all these flavors in here. Oh, this is a happy accident.
Speaker 2:
This is a happy accident. It has to be. They were trying for a smoked porter, like a coffee smoked porter. Hey man, you know what this tastes like.
Speaker 4:
Like I just finished a cigarette, a smoke break. It tastes like a smoke break. But if I didn't know what this was, that's the thing.
Speaker 1:
That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4:
It's still really f***ing good, but this is.
Speaker 1:
That's the part that I'm getting to.
Speaker 4:
There's a transference of consciousness between me and the person who brewed this beer 638 beers.
Speaker 2:
We got a couple.
Speaker 4:
Out of Oakland Remarkable. It only took this many times to figure this out. This is the only beer they brewed what it's 638 beers. I just said that I know, but if you tried 638 times to.
Speaker 1:
Oh, Recreate this. But they have different versions of I know.
Speaker 4:
but it's like this is lightning in a bottle.
Speaker 1:
Whatever, the burning process is Dude no, do you know what you need for this? To do the true burning, you need the Imperial version.
Speaker 2:
I think I'm okay.
Speaker 4:
No, I'm lighting this with a Bic. Right, we're never going to make it to 50. Never going to go public, I don't know.
Speaker 1:
Did anybody do any research on Cellar Maker? Nope, no sure didn't. Out of Oakland, california, small batches, one beer at a time they say. So part of me says isn't that how everybody makes beer? Don't you just make one beer at a time? Yes, but it does make me kind of wonder. Like are they legit? Like we only have the space to like.
Speaker 2:
Oh, like we have a single brew system, that's what I'm wondering.
Speaker 4:
No, they just poured this over the grounds of the coffee they make every morning Coffee and ashes, much like you did in Bellingham. You can get delivery, or oh yeah, sends the cigarettes.
Speaker 2:
This tastes like minis at 5am before we stumbled our way across downtown Seattle.
Speaker 4:
They have After spending three hours walking half a f***ing mile.
Speaker 1:
Delivery or pickup options if you're local. They also have a house of pizza in San Francisco, a location in Oakland, berkeley, and maybe a brand new location Maybe Oakland's a new one, but we drop new flavors weekly for maximum freshness. These are the most current Taste, the essence at each location. Below there is a nitro version right now currently, of coffee and cigarettes. They do. Oh, this is a barrel aged imperial stout with banana, strawberry and vanilla. You say stout with banana Barrel aged?
Speaker 4:
I know, like I can't decide how I feel about that well, I'm gonna take them at their word for whatever they named the beer, yeah, uh this one's called back away banana breath okay there's a little bit of a chocolatey in there too, in this joking aside, there are flavors that remind us of literally, coffee and cigarettes, but if you're looking at this attacking it exactly as a porter, a smoked porter, I think it's fantastic.
Speaker 1:
I actually think it's a little undersmoked, if you're if you're talking about a straight up smoked porter, I really think it's actually underdone. On the smokiness that I would have anticipated a little more. That's where the coffee comes in.
Speaker 4:
I think that it could like balance it out they wanted that coffee to hit you in the background, to give you that coffee and cigarettes. You were like me and alec were having our minds blown about. We had a. I think we just had a transcendental experience five minutes ago. This came back down to earth. Um, I don't have porters a lot, so that's why I wanted. I saw the name yeah, this was a name. By then I saw a porter and I was like, oh, yeah, I think.
Speaker 4:
Cause the last quarter I had was up at Lost woods. Lost woods, they had a. Was it a raspberry porter?
Speaker 1:
Oh, dear, god.
Speaker 4:
I do not remember they had a. They had a fruited porter we had last time and it was so delicious like that. It's a that porter dark quarter flavor that we don't get a lot because you get a lot of stouts and whatnot. Um, but getting the coffee in this is stout adjacent, which I think will grab some stout folks. I know we talk about gateway beers and whatnot Porters always felt like a graduate level.
Speaker 1:
If you're such a nerd that you're like, I only drink stouts. I don't drink porters.
Speaker 4:
Bro, come on Well you're already a stout nerd. I get it when you went and visited the captain last year. Bro, come on, well you're already a stout nerd.
Speaker 1:
I get it. But what? When you went and visited the captain last year, you went to a brewery in San Diego. Do you remember the name of said brewery? Was it North Park? No, okay, never mind. Then I thought that's what it was. They just had some good collabs with them. So yeah, I mean there is a lot of seemingly really good and variety of beers that they're making, um, that I would be interested in checking out. More from cellar maker. I never heard of them. But yeah, this the porter like I said it it is it does feel porter in the fact that there is just like a little bit lighter body to it. Yeah, it doesn't feel like that kind of standard American stout type of thing, but yeah, I'm not mad about it, it's just a little. I didn't have quite the like.
Speaker 4:
The impact.
Speaker 1:
Whatever your guys' reaction was oh man, rough day. When their discount day on Tuesday is Cheap Pint Tuesday, all house pints are only six bucks Oof. I think that's just the way life is going, though I can't blame them for that. They're also in the Bay Area, so they're probably running South O'Brewing. Okay, I knew there was a direction. How about this, though? Friday lunch, special Detroit style slice side salad and a pint.
Speaker 2:
Detroit style salad Slice of pizza. What's a Detroit style?
Speaker 1:
That's a great question.
Speaker 4:
Is it like deep?
Speaker 1:
dish salad. No, and a side salad.
Speaker 2:
It's a pizza, Slice of pizza.
Speaker 1:
You have pizza a salad and a beer, but I don't know what a.
Speaker 4:
Detroit style pizza is. For how many dollars are we talking about here?
Speaker 1:
What would be a deal for you, thick? Slice of pizza, a salad and a beer. What would be a good deal for you.
Speaker 2:
I'm not getting under 10 bucks.
Speaker 4:
It's 800 calories, I'll give you $14.99.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, you're not getting this one, then, oh yikes, $18. Again, bay Area For a slice of pizza and salad and a beer. That's tough.
Speaker 2:
That's tough, buddy, don't look at it.
Speaker 1:
Bay.
Speaker 4:
Area. You know how many lunches you used to be able to get for 20 bucks.
Speaker 2:
It's rectangle, so many lunches. Oh, oh, that's right, detroit style rectangle pizza, so elementary school style, yeah, okay.
Speaker 1:
Dude, but not as thin. They're not as thin. No, you're talking of the ones where it was legit a rectangle and you would really like it, because they sometimes would have to do the double cut and you got the little antenna that would hang off the side of your square the middle school ones was like the square pepperoni on top and you had like a thin slice of it. That was in a very you got a pop-tart size.
Speaker 4:
Yes, exactly.
Speaker 2:
You fold it in half.
Speaker 4:
You need to like a sandwich, or you put your salad in it like a taco and you just man mod all oh there you go okay, then you chug your glut, your pint of milk.
Speaker 1:
You drink your milk. Yeah, or you're like me on the first day of freshman year, you try to reshake your chocolate milk and spray it all over yourself and a few people at the table. There you go. Luckily I live nearby and someone brought me a change of clothes. Poor girl who sat next to me had to wear chocolate milk the rest of the day.
Speaker 2:
You ate?
Speaker 1:
lunch on campus, freshman year, the literally the first day of school maybe how are you knowing people and choosing to leave campus?
Speaker 2:
that was day one, it was invited off campus day one freshman year. I lived in my neighborhood. I hung out with them.
Speaker 1:
We live in different neighborhoods, sir.
Speaker 2:
What do you mean? Campus food? I did no, we're going to Taco Bell Loading up on some garbage.
Speaker 1:
Alright, finish your glass. I never even actually had a Big Mac until going for lunch At uh. Yes to leaving to go to lunch, like probably sophomore year never had a.
Speaker 4:
Big Mac until then. Isn't that weird totally using glory days on the Instagram post?
Speaker 2:
for this episode.
Speaker 4:
Jesus using what yeah, I know it's a song glory days that song the boomers play when they feel sad about where their life is right now. You'll hear it, okay. Yeah, anyways, consume our own media. I will Song the boomers play when they feel sad about where their life is right now.
Speaker 1:
You'll hear it Okay, yeah, anyways, consume our own media.
Speaker 2:
I will Brian bottoms up.
Speaker 1:
What's your plan, though? What are you picking? Are you having this again? Are you not having?
Speaker 2:
it again. No, no, no, no, oh, never, no, no. My coffee and cigarette days are well behind me. That's true. You've given up both of those. One of them I never really smoked. Yes, instantly at all. No, coffee's been three four years Fantastic beer.
Speaker 3:
I'd get it again.
Speaker 1:
Wonderfully done by.
Speaker 4:
Cellar Maker. I never want to taste it again.
Speaker 1:
I'd get it again. I'm not mad about it. I apparently don't have the same.
Speaker 4:
I'm not mad about it. I don't want to remember this period of my life.
Speaker 2:
I need to brush my teeth.
Speaker 1:
Well, your glasses are empty. I'm going to enjoy mine. There you go. We'll catch you guys next time.
Speaker 3:
If you've enjoyed what you just heard, make sure you subscribe to get new episodes when they drop, and don't forget to leave us a review. If you want to see what we're drinking when we're not on the pod, you can follow us on social media at A Beer Review. Feel free to send us any beer suggestions that we can make. Chad go buy off of Tavor.
