When faced with insurmountable challenges, where do we turn for strength? Lorna Grayling's narrative, woven through trials of abduction, trauma, and personal battles, is a beacon of hope for anyone navigating life's stormiest seas. My conversation with this remarkable woman uncovers the layers of her life—from her South African roots to her thriving presence in the United States, and how she's shaped her experiences into a force for good.
Lorna's heartfelt recollection of her husband's kidnapping and their subsequent journey of healing draws a vivid picture of resilience. She speaks candidly about the power of prayer, therapy, and the unconditional support of family as cornerstones in overcoming the shadows of past trauma. This episode also delves into how Lorna conquered her fears, transformed her self-image, and embraced unexpected roles in modeling and media, ultimately founding Women Empower, an organization dedicated to uplifting women around the world.
Prepare to be moved and motivated by Lorna's incredible transition into acting and her role as a talk show host on the CJC Network, where she continues to inspire with her indomitable spirit. Her story exemplifies how faith can be our anchor and how choosing to focus on the light can guide us through the darkest of times. Join us as we celebrate the journey of a woman who exemplifies the art of turning adversity into triumph, and fear into unshakeable faith.
When faced with insurmountable challenges, where do we turn for strength? Lorna Grayling's narrative, woven through trials of abduction, trauma, and personal battles, is a beacon of hope for anyone navigating life's stormiest seas. My conversation with this remarkable woman uncovers the layers of her life—from her South African roots to her thriving presence in the United States, and how she's shaped her experiences into a force for good.
Lorna's heartfelt recollection of her husband's kidnapping and their subsequent journey of healing draws a vivid picture of resilience. She speaks candidly about the power of prayer, therapy, and the unconditional support of family as cornerstones in overcoming the shadows of past trauma. This episode also delves into how Lorna conquered her fears, transformed her self-image, and embraced unexpected roles in modeling and media, ultimately founding Women Empower, an organization dedicated to uplifting women around the world.
Prepare to be moved and motivated by Lorna's incredible transition into acting and her role as a talk show host on the CJC Network, where she continues to inspire with her indomitable spirit. Her story exemplifies how faith can be our anchor and how choosing to focus on the light can guide us through the darkest of times. Join us as we celebrate the journey of a woman who exemplifies the art of turning adversity into triumph, and fear into unshakeable faith.
Hi, family, welcome to Zets TV. Today we have a great one for you. We have an amazing guest. She's a wife, a mother, she was a news anchor, she's a model, she's an author, she's a business woman, a motivational speaker. She has her own organization, she has a TV show. Well, I mean, the list goes on and on. She's just amazing. And today we have with us Lorna Grayling. Grayling right, grayling, you did it, you did it. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2:Welcome.
Speaker 1:Welcome. It's such an honor to have you with us today, Lorna. You have such an amazing story and I'm so glad that you came on here to share it with us. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2:It's my pleasure Thank you for having me. It's always wonderful to share our stories because that leaves the legacy of hope right. And it gives us a reason for what we've been here, so I love it. Thank you for that.
Speaker 1:And it empowers us, something that you're so passionate about.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely Absolutely so, Lorna where?
Speaker 1:are you from? Tell us a little bit about you.
Speaker 2:You're married, have kids yeah, so I'm originally from South Africa, so that's where the accent is from and I lived there for about 45 years Wow. And because of a whole bunch of circumstances and we can get going to that a little bit later we immigrated to the United States, so we've been here now for about two years.
Speaker 1:Do you like it?
Speaker 2:And we love it. We love it. What a wonderful, wonderful, amazing nation filled with beautiful people. So, yeah, we're absolutely loving it. And yeah, I've been married for about 24 years. I have three daughters teenagers One just turned 21. So I think her brain is finally settled again, right, our hope is that yeah, yes because, teenagers is like a completely different species.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, they test our character. They do.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, my one friend told me the ones. She said um, that's the reason why certain insects eat their young right is to avoid teenage years. I believe that wholeheartedly.
Speaker 1:Now they look at them and they're like nah, you ain't gonna make it to teenage years, I'm done with you right now, but we made it.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean I, at least I survived one. The next one is about 18 now, and then I have a 15 year old, so yeah, by now.
Speaker 1:I think I'm used to it.
Speaker 2:I know what's coming oh yeah, that's such a shock right are they always hungry?
Speaker 1:my teenagers were always hungry.
Speaker 2:Hungry, I wouldn't I have girls, so they're not always hungry, but they're full of nonsense like I will cook my heart out and they're like, oh, what are we eating? We're eating this. I don't feel like eating this. What you?
Speaker 1:ungrateful little yeah, anyway, I had two boys. Oh my god, lorna, they are forever hungry. They were forever hungry. It was incredible, like I'm like oh my god, I'm gonna need another job just to feed you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think my brother was that I remember my mom used to always say oh, my goodness, she's just always hungry. Yeah, so eat all you can. Buffets I think those are, you know, places that we used to hang out, literally the best places literally Lorna, and then I understand that you have this amazing story because you went through this journey.
Speaker 1:You have a couple of amazing stories, but I want to start right. Start backtracking a little bit. In 2010, I think it was that you had the unfortunate situation. You were in South Africa. Your husband's an engineer. What happened?
Speaker 2:Yes, so my husband is an audio engineer, so he worked for a big corporation in South Africa and they basically did big sport broadcasts all around the world, mainly in Africa. So a lot of football, soccer, uh, cricket, rugby, you know, that's right, all the good stuff, yes, um. So yeah, they were broadcasting a soccer match in Nigeria and just as they finished the broadcast they all got into their crew bus and they were heading back to the airport to fly out again, and then, on their way back to the airport, they were ambushed by 55 rebel rebels with AK-47 guns, rocket launchers and there were 10 people who were kidnapped in that situation. And he was the only one from South Africa at the time and, yeah, he was kidnapped by these people, tortured severely for 10 days and held hostage. So, yeah, we went through all of that. Literally, you know, I always say praise God. Literally I met Jesus about I think it was about eight years before.
Speaker 1:Okay, so you guys were Christians when this happened.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, I had a complete turnaround in my life, um, where I really had this encounter with the lord and I knew who he was. I knew him, I knew his voice, I knew his strength. Um, you know, it's different to just say I'm a christian and rather than to know god intimately.
Speaker 2:So I knew the lord and that was my strength to get through that horrific ordeal. Because, yeah, they, they, at times they were going to. They tried to cut off his head, they tried to cut off his arms and they would torture him and beat him severely and he would be screaming at the top of his voice, screaming help me, help me, help me. They're going to kill me.
Speaker 2:And then I would hear they beat him and you know, because they will call you and you would hear it in the background yes, on the phone, on the, on the mobile phone, they would call me and then they would torture him and so that I can hear that he's dying, literally, and then, as he was screaming, help me. They would shoot and then kill the phone and so there would be dead silence. So for days I wouldn't know whether he's dead or alive or what had happened to him. So yeah, it was a crazy, crazy time.
Speaker 1:Those 10 days for him? Did they give him water, food, or it was just plain torture?
Speaker 2:Most of it, mostly just torture. I know I think on the fourth or third day they did give him some water. There was one or two days that they brought them, towards the end, a little bit of rice, like a little bit of. It's a very, very spicy rice, but he said it burnt his mouth so much that he couldn't eat anything and I think the stress right he wasn't really hungry.
Speaker 2:I mean, after I we got him out, which was a miracle. Um, I mean, it was just like a little skeleton. Couldn't believe how much weight he could lose, you know, in in only 10 days. But yeah, no, he didn't look good at all.
Speaker 1:Well, I know you don't share publicly how how you got him out, because it's in the book. Um, I'm sorry, but how did you explain the situations to your daughters, like, how many daughters did you have at the time?
Speaker 2:yeah, they were all three born. The baby was about one and then four years old and then around six, seven years old, the oldest one, thankfully at the time. You know he went away often on business trips, so you know he would travel all over the world. He would be gone for a couple of weeks, come back, been gone for a couple of so they were used to him not being home right now for periods of time.
Speaker 2:Um, so at first I just thought when we had, when we got the news that he was kidnapped and going through all this, I had such faith that he was going to be fine.
Speaker 2:Especially in the beginning we all start out with loads of faith. Initially I didn't tell the kids that he was kidnapped. By the time he's back, I wouldn't even have to tell them. But then, as it went on and you know, there were times that we really didn't know whether he was alive anymore and I realized I had to tell them. And also it was head news you know headlines in South Africa at that stage and they were in school, you know, especially the oldest one and I thought best to not find that out in school. So I just sat them down one night and I tried to explain in as simple language as possible.
Speaker 1:Right, because a six-year-old, yeah, how do?
Speaker 2:you explain that to?
Speaker 1:a three-year-old and a six-year-old.
Speaker 2:And I just said to them look, there's been some men and they've taken daddy away. We don't know where he is. They're looking for him, they're doing everything they can to find him, but we are not sure where he is. But we are praying and we're trusting God to be with us and to help us find him. And that was that. You know, they were so young. Fortunately, they didn't have a lot of questions.
Speaker 1:Right exactly. Was there a moment where you thought I'm never going to see him again?
Speaker 2:Yes, especially in those moments where he, would you know, scream in that absolute agony. I mean, those are sounds that, until today, when I think about it, it literally rocks your body. It sounds that you can feel like it went through my bones, not even only through my ears. When he screams like that, and then when they shoot and the phone dies, I mean your whole body reacts.
Speaker 2:It sounds like he's just died, then in that moment yes, you know there's a lot of despair and and thoughts going through your mind. You know, is he dead, is he alive? And so you'll have that moment. But then after that, I would literally sit and make a choice and decide I am going to believe that he's going to be fine, I'm going to have faith, even though it sounded like he didn't make it. Until they can show me the death certificate, I'm just going to hang on to faith. And I had that faith because, before he was kidnapped, a friend of mine the morning before he was kidnapped she sent me a message to my cell phone. Was psalm 91 and you.
Speaker 2:It's a beautiful psalm and it really talks about how god sends his angels to protect us and you know, and that we will not even bump our foot against the stone, because god is with us and and it's just a beautiful psalm. And she sent, sent me that psalm and she added in her own words she said no harm will come to your family. She just felt like she needed to say that out loud again, like even after the beautiful psalm.
Speaker 2:And when I got that you know, sometimes we get messages we don't really you see it, you don't really read it, but for some reason that morning I felt like the Holy Spirit. I was just. I read that message and it just grabbed my heart and I just thought, yes, I received this word. I'm going to take it and I believe it and I speak it over my family and that was that. You know I went on my kids, got them dressed for school. You know how it is in the morning the three little kids?
Speaker 1:Yeah, of course.
Speaker 2:Home alone with all the kids, and you know it's chaos. So I didn't think anything of it. But then, when I got the news that he had been kidnapped, the first thing that I could remember or that went through my mind was that scripture and I thought, well, now I have a choice. I'm getting the news now I have all these government officials and people and media around my house and it's like chaos. My husband has been kidnapped. Nothing makes sense.
Speaker 2:So I have a choice to believe the word of God, the scripture that I got that I know it meant something or I can grab onto fear and anxiety and look at all the facts that are in front of me and I distinctly realized the difference in the choice. There's a, there's a distinct choice to be made and I have to choose which one am I gonna write, you know, hold on to. And I decided I'm gonna hold on to the scripture no matter what, and I felt like that was my, that was my saving grace, if you can say that, because whenever everything went wrong, I would go back to that choice again.
Speaker 2:I'm like, no, I'm not going to believe all this. I'm going to believe the word of God, I'm going to believe that everything is going to be fine, everything's going to be okay, he's going to get out and at one, even thought, you know, even if he doesn't make it, I still choose to believe that God's got a good plan for my life Right, and he will be with me and I will get through this no matter what. So, yeah, I mean it sounds you know, simply said now, no, it's not.
Speaker 1:That leads me to my next question. Okay, once he's home, what happens after? Like you know, ptsd nightmares. You know what happened once he was home with him and you, how did you deal with it?
Speaker 2:Yes, absolutely, and that's a great question because you know there's a lot that goes on and, like you say, there's a lot of mental healing that has to be done after something as severe as that, and even if you don't go through something that is so severe, sometimes it's a small thing that can affect us.
Speaker 2:You know that just needs some healing. I think it was a complete miracle. You know what he looked like when he came back. I mean, the fact that we got him out was an absolute miracle. So, yeah, they'll have to read the book, for that to see how we got him out, which is amazing, but he didn't have any sleepless nights whatsoever.
Speaker 2:In the beginning he was you beginning. We couldn't turn off all the lights. He was kept in a very pitch black dark room for a couple of days where you couldn't even see his hand in front of his face. And they would just come by and beat him and hit him with a gun against his head, and so he never knew what came. So at night when we switch off all the lights. So for the first couple of weeks we didn't switch off all the lights at night, so that was the thing Of course yes.
Speaker 2:And then where he was kept in Nigeria it's a very, very humid environment. It was very hot, very humid, so we had to constantly make sure that, you know, he didn't have any too much heat. So I just made sure we had a lot of fans on.
Speaker 2:If he got very hot, I could see he got quite agitated and then a few times we would be in the car at a traffic light and people would walk past the car or something you know, just passing in the street and I could see like he was so freaked out, triggered, trigger, triggered him and things like that. So for those things we did do, I think, for?
Speaker 2:a couple of weeks he went through some therapy right and that really helped, and then after that it was really prayer and just I would just say the power of God, because God is able and above to, to do more than we can ever dream of and even heal severe PTSD such as that, and and so, yeah, I mean just he was fine after that, yeah, doing very, very well.
Speaker 1:Yes, um, we would love to have him with us also, if he's willing to share.
Speaker 2:Yeah very serious, you know stuff that he went through there.
Speaker 1:And then how long did it take you guys to actually be back to normal? Like, okay, he's back to normal, it's him again.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think sometimes you go through, you go to a new normal after something like that. Because I don't think after something as severe and, as you know, he's more alert.
Speaker 1:Yeah, now he's more.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, and you have a different realization and an appreciation for life. Yeah, so it's almost like a new normal. Also, he couldn't continue his work in nigeria anymore either, so he had to change jobs. He couldn't go back to that job anymore, um, because you know, it was just, yeah, he wasn't able to travel to nigeria anymore after that and um. So, yeah, a lot of things changed for us during that time, but change even though it's scary. If we believe that God's got our best interest at heart, it always for the better.
Speaker 2:Of course, even if it doesn't seem like it at the time. So, yes, definitely. You know, took us a few years to get back into a new groove and a new job and all the kinds of things that goes with that.
Speaker 1:But as for now I mean he is, he's doing fine absolutely fine, thank god yeah um, he's a walking miracle, he is a walking miracle absolutely yes, and then fast forwarding to covid19. When covid19 hits, you guys, you know you had your own business and obviously everything slows down. You lose money, you lose jobs and you guys decide to downsize. Right, you get a smaller house.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, we literally lost. I mean, you know, in South Africa the economy started to deteriorate.
Speaker 1:Right Everywhere, I think worldwide. It was like a pause everywhere.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but even before COVID, in the last 25 years the governments of South Africa really just, you know, the whole country just deteriorated. So job unemployment is up to almost 50%, you know. Crime is just rising. They don't have proper electricity facilities anymore. The power will just be cut off for hours on end. There's not enough water, water will just be cut off for days on end, and so those kind of things you know is detrimental to a country and growth and business. So my business already started struggling, you know, due to that.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:And then after COVID, of course, you know know, not being able to work, and in South Africa, it wasn't only just a few months that we were closed, they closed everything for a very long time, and so we really struggled and so, yeah, literally we just had to close everything and we lost everything. Um, so, long story short. After that, um, we started making films and things. We just got on our feet, some, you know, in a different way, and just as we were gonna, you know, start started. As we started to get busier and get bookings and all that, we got attacked in our home and like an armed robbery in South Africa. Were you?
Speaker 2:in the home at the time the kids, Myself myself, my husband the kids, everybody, and so, and then they stole everything that we had, you know, all our camera gear, everything, hundreds of thousands of rands, which is the currency in South Africa, but literally, literally. We had nothing left to work with, to create an income with nothing, was it?
Speaker 1:by surprise. You guys were sleeping. Yes, yes In.
Speaker 2:South Africa. The crime is just exceptionally high. Wow, Very, very high.
Speaker 1:It's not something that's mentioned often in the news or anything, it doesn't get a lot of publicity.
Speaker 2:But South Africa has got one of the highest crime rates in the world, and so that's kind of a regular crime rates in the world. And um, and so that's kind of a regular thing is people getting robbed and so on. Um, but yeah, and you're kind of lucky that you're alive.
Speaker 2:Afterwards, you know, it's kind of the going saying in South Africa oh well, fortunately you're okay, you know yeah they didn't kill you or shoot you or something, and so, but yeah, everything we had um to create an income with was being stolen, so we lost everything but they didn't assault any of you, fortunately not.
Speaker 2:I heard them, um, when I was sleeping and I heard something downstairs, and so I went downstairs we had a double-story home at the time and when I went downstairs, I, um, I found these guys, you know, busy climbing into our home, breaking open the doors and whatnot. Um, and I don't know why, I would even do something like that but I just started screaming and I ran towards them and I just jumped and then I started attacking two of the guys. Yeah, out of shock. I think you're so stupid. Like why would you do something like? But it's interesting, you never know, like, how are you gonna react in a stressful situation like that?
Speaker 1:are you gonna fight? I think it's the mom's thing. Yeah, it's the mom's thing, my babies are here, my baby's, like yeah, literally my babies are in the house. I'm gonna take you for sure, and I think that's what went through my mind.
Speaker 2:Like my, my, my daughter was a room, was right there. It was only me standing in between the attackers, you know, and her, and the only thing I could think of was just attack, like I'm going to protect my child and and so fortunately that I did that like they were so dumbstruck by I imagine jumping out of the dark on top of them that they got a fright and they kind of were just I don't know, and I believe it was just God's hand as well on the situation.
Speaker 2:But unfortunately they dropped everything and they ran, but by then they already had, because there were about four or five guys and they'd already taken all of our stuff, so we couldn't get our stuff back. But at least we, you know, we didn't lose our lives, which was great.
Speaker 1:Exactly, your husband was in the house at the time.
Speaker 2:Yes, he was still sleeping by then. He had, you know, heard all this commotion, and then you know, there were gunshots being fired, and I don't even remember the rest, I just know I'm screaming and attacking this guy, but it's like a.
Speaker 1:So let's add that to the list. She will fight you off. Yeah, don't attack my children. Yep, she will tackle you. Yep, we add that to the list. So, and then again your circle. It's Alterated. How long did it take To feel safe at home, again, normal, you know, like, because that's stripped away from you, the security? How long did it take you To go back to normal?
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. So that was not the first time that we were attacked Like in South Africa. This is kind of A regular thing, if I can say that We've been attacked previously In a different home and I've been attacked about twice on on the road on my way to work, having guns against my head and then wanting to steal my car and, you know, taking your personal stuff and things like that. So, um, we've, we had quite a few incidents where, you know, our safety and our environment were compromised.
Speaker 2:If I can say yeah right, it's a hard thing to have that, because once someone comes into your home where you're supposed to feel safe you know it's not easy to feel safe then after that it's such an intrusion into your safe space and I think you know it's almost like a decision. Again I had to choose whether I'm going to, in my mind, grab onto fear like what if this happens again? What if they come? And you know what if they come back? What if? What if? So either go that way or, in my mind, believe, like you know, we're good, we're safe, we safe, we're gonna be fine, they're not gonna come back. I mean, it's gonna be fine with that.
Speaker 2:I feel like that's what happened to one family like that one, but I'm playing, we're not going back there crazy, yeah, so but it's, you know, it's a very big mindset that you have to decide to grab hold of. And then it almost takes exercise to stay there, because it's easy to say, oh, I'm gonna have faith, like I'm gonna believe, the best is gonna happen for me. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna grab onto fearful thoughts. But in nature, I mean we, our minds, want to grab onto fearful thoughts it's almost like the natural thing.
Speaker 1:Yes, to be scared.
Speaker 2:It's the first thing, yeah, first thing that comes up, yeah, I'm gonna be scared, and so I found, like it is, it's almost like a training, when you realize. It's like taking your, your brain to the gym and training it all the time to have positive thoughts, to believe in the best outcome, no matter what you see, no matter what you see, no matter what you feel, and to exercise that mindset and that way of thinking. And once you decide, like that's what I want to do, I want to be a positive person, I want to believe the best, and then you know to develop those skills to do that. It's not something that comes naturally.
Speaker 1:No, and I think fear is the first thing that shows up, because we understand that we don't have control of the situation. Yes, that's what creates the most fear when you don't have the control of the situation.
Speaker 2:Um and it keeps us safe, right I? Mean being scared, keeps you safe, like you're not gonna run into a fiery building because that's just stupid. Yeah, unless you're a fire um, you know. Yeah, I mean if that's your, unless you're a fireman.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, if that's your job, that's a whole different story. If you're a fireman, you know what you're doing.
Speaker 2:Exactly so. Fear keeps us safe as well. But then hanging on to fearful thoughts and anxiousness, that's a different story. Like that is then a choice that we unconsciously start to make, and that's that negative mindset deciding like, oh, this is probably going to happen again to me. I'm just not going to sleep, because what if they come back? And so I had to train myself and say, no, I'm going to sleep well tonight, like I am going to be protected and until they do come, come back, then I'll deal with that and whatever happens, it's going to be fine. So but it you know, it's a mindset, it's like a lot of self-talk. But if you can do that, there's a lot of peace and healing that comes with that. And that's how I feel like we've dealt with the most of our PTSD. So then we can say like we've been through all of this and yet we're doing super well Of course.
Speaker 2:Literally. I don't feel like I have any PTSD. Yeah, I'm really focused on training my brain, retraining and rewiring, no matter the circumstances, and I'm a testament that that can be done. You can do that.
Speaker 1:Paul says it in in Romans we have to renew our minds every single day. So every single day we have to remind ourselves Christ lives through me. You know I'm strong, I got this. I got this. Yes, god has a plan.
Speaker 2:Everything is going to work out absolutely, and that that is the key, and that is not something that we hear very often, because we look at films and movies and reality shows and what is it? It's all about feelings. Yeah you feel, go with that. But that's not the truth, that's not what the Word of God says.
Speaker 1:The Word of.
Speaker 2:God says you speak the word over the situation, over your feelings. Don't let your feelings, you know, determine where you're gonna go. But it's not.
Speaker 1:It's not easy and we have the power of life or death in our tongue, exactly. So you know that's very powerful, exactly, and it's just the power of self-talk, like you say.
Speaker 2:Now we have the power of life and death in our tongues. It's in our mouths, and how often do we speak out negative things? Over ourselves over situations. I mean, we watch the news. It's mostly negative.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is.
Speaker 2:And so we're constantly filled with negative words, negative thoughts, negative environments, and so it's important to speak those positive things, speak the word of. God, not just read like one small scripture whenever, so often it pops up on Facebook. But to literally sit in the Word of God and speak these things over our lives.
Speaker 1:That's why the faith comes by hearing. When you speak, you hear what you're speaking and you feed your spirit of course, exactly. I know exactly what you mean.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and when you have faith, you have hope yeah when you have hope, I mean, you have power. When you're powerful, your life is going to a whole different direction.
Speaker 1:Rather than having fear, you're just numbs you and stops you yeah, it stops you from fulfilling your purpose of course something that I did that shocked me in your story was that it wasn't until 2014 that you were 36, that you started your modeling career. You're such a beautiful woman. Why wouldn't you have done that, like in your? You're so kind, I'm just gonna sit here no, really, I mean I'm like wait a minute, she's dropped that gorgeous. Why wouldn't she start in her teen years like this is a whole nother shift, 180 degrees shift. You start modeling. How did that happen, oh my?
Speaker 2:god, great question. I'm so glad you asked that. Yes, um, you know it's so interesting and thank you for saying that. Uh, but when you don't believe that you're beautiful, like you know, that's not something that I ever believed I never. I thought I was ugly, I thought I was fat.
Speaker 1:I was too scared. Oh my God.
Speaker 2:I was too scared to speak in front of anybody when I was at school. Literally I couldn't speak in class. I mean, I was a chatterbox with friends and people, one-on-one, but if I had to stand, up, you know when you stand up and read in front of the whole class or do a speech or something. Oh my goodness, I felt like I was gonna die, like my whole body would react. I would be sweating the fear, my legs would be numb, I'd be shaking. I forgot all my words.
Speaker 1:I just it was terrifying for you.
Speaker 2:Terrifying Absolutely, and my body would react to that terror and fear like so badly when I was young. So for me to think, to get up on stage, you know, in front of a crowd or it was, it was unthinkable, it was not in your plans, not at all.
Speaker 2:No never and so. But God, god had different plans, right, and so when I had this wonderful encounter with Jesus and I'll share that actually I was at a very bad stage in my life and I was actually going to commit suicide. I had a gun against my head, I was in my room and I was literally just ready to pull the trigger and kill myself.
Speaker 1:How old were you when that happened? My daughter was about one, so I was literally just ready to pull the trigger. And how old were you when that?
Speaker 2:happened. My daughter was about one, so I was maybe 25, your first born?
Speaker 1:yes, and Lorna, I'm so sorry what drove you to that. Can you come to be sharing?
Speaker 2:just just depression. Um, you know, I think postpartum depression I never realized.
Speaker 1:You know know, having a baby, oh yeah, we don't realize we go through that.
Speaker 2:Exactly, and everybody has babies and they're fine doing it, or they seem fine, but I wasn't, you know. I just I wasn't sleeping properly. I had building this new business, I was working myself to pieces. My husband was usually gone for weeks or months at an end and at that stage, you know, I had drug abuse. I was abusing drugs, you know alcohol, drinking, smoking. So my life was in a whole different direction, right and all of those things together it just spiraled out of control, basically. And so I was on my knees having this gun and I just heard a voice. I, someone, somewhere, must have been praying for me. I believe my family, my grand, my some of my clients. I just knew people had been praying for me, you know afterwards I realized people were praying for me, so never underestimate the power of prayer.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, I tell my kids all the time, all the time Prayer changes everything. Pray, pray, pray. Don't ever be ashamed to pray, no matter what you see.
Speaker 2:Keep praying, anyway, and I was on my knees and I was going to pull the trigger and as I wanted to do that, I heard a voice and the voice said ask me. And I was like ask who? Like I'm devastated, I'm crying, I want to kill myself, I'm not even in a sound mind, space, right. And the voice said, and I said who? And the voice said to me, me, the God of Abram, isaac and Jacob. And I just felt God's presence and I knew this was God in my midst. Wow. And I said all right, lord, if you are real, show me.
Speaker 2:And I was, in that instance, taken into a different space. However crazy this sounds, I knew I was now not on earth anymore, I was in heaven. And I just I couldn't look up because I realized like I'm in heaven but I'm not supposed to be here because I'm so sinful. So I was just looking on the ground the whole time and I just only thing I could see was this cobblestone paving in front of me and I was sitting on the side of a well and I just saw a man come towards me with a white robe, brown sandals, and then I saw the holes in his feet and I knew that this was Jesus walking towards me in the midst of my sin and just in this moment where I don't even deserve nothing, pure love. And I just felt, as I was sitting there, like this, waves and waves of electricity going through my body and I just realized, like this is what love feels like Right.
Speaker 2:It changes your entire DNA. And he came to me, didn't say a word, just put his hand in the water in the well and put it on my head and I was just like electric. I don't even know how to explain it. It's like this waves of love and electricity reshaping my DNA inside of me. In the next moment I was back in my room and awake and well realizing what had happened and and I had just my whole life changed Like 180 degrees from that moment. I used to swear quite badly.
Speaker 2:We've all been through that, we've all been there and yeah, I was just like, just like that, I was just a new creation, just a new creation, and that's the power of being in the presence of Jesus, it's your whole life. You know, we'll just take a 180 degree shift. Yeah, just because of the power of love. Right, just love, pure love, and yeah, and so that was my new life, you know. After that, and then like I say thankfully you know I met Jesus before my husband was kidnapped, but anyway.
Speaker 1:So coming back to the modeling, yes, that was such an amazing story. I got to this story now.
Speaker 2:Obviously God wanted us to share that.
Speaker 1:It's something that a lot of women we can identify with. So thank you for sharing it, because I hardly never share this. But when I was pregnant with my third daughter, I was going through a rough patch in my marriage. We got married very young so obviously he he wants to be like more with his friends, more stuck home kids and like my life was going the way I thought it was gonna go and there was a moment, there was one night where I stood in the balcony.
Speaker 1:I lived in a fourth floor and I was thinking in my mind um, I should just jump like you know what is the point. I was so depressed I was so angry I was, so I don't know. It's just this big deception and and the funny thing is that I, when I was getting ready to, jump I, I heard my son that you met, Roberto.
Speaker 2:I heard him crying. He was a baby at the time. I heard him crying so I dried my tears and I went to the room to see what was wrong with him when I get to the room he's sleeping. Wow, and he was sound asleep and I just fell on my knees and I just started crying on him Like all night and thanking God and I was like what was I thinking?
Speaker 1:You know, so I understand your experience and you said it like oh my God, I felt goosebumps and everything. I was like wow, what I lived. And you know.
Speaker 2:Just the power of God right, he's so good. Yeah, so coming back to the modeling, I mean, you know, once I had that encounter with God. Of course he has different plans for our lives than what we think, and usually the areas where we think we're weak and we don't know good in ourselves those are the areas that we usually will get pushed in right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:So how I started modeling one morning my phone again. People just love sending me text messages.
Speaker 2:But, a client of mine sent me a text message saying Lorna, I've been praying for you and I really feel like God wants you to start modeling and enter this competition. And she sent me a link and she said have you ever heard of Mrs South Africa? And I feel like God is leading me to tell you you should enter that. And I looked at this text message and I and of course now I'm answering her I'm like oh, praise God, thank you for the message you know and thank you for praying for me. But in my brain I'm thinking are you crazy? This?
Speaker 1:ain't God.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to enter a beauty pageant. I was like I'm not going to enter a beauty pageant. Are you crazy? I've seen those pageants. There's no way I'm going to enter into that. I don't think God will say something like that number one. And I didn't even know there was like a Mrs South Africa. I thought Miss, you know for the young girls. But I mean, I'm a mom, I'm married, I'm not going to enter a pageant.
Speaker 1:Are you crazy?
Speaker 2:and I just discarded it and I opened my emails and the very first email was from a different person saying hi, lauren, you know she was talking about something else that we discussed earlier in the week. And she said and by the way, I've been praying for you and I really feel like God wants you to enter those. And she puts a link in the email and I was like, oh, enter what? And I'm like clicking the link and then this whole this is South Africa website entry page pops up and is like enter here and like this whole thing. I'm like no, you have got to be kidding me. Like this is the second person in one morning. It's not, I haven't even had breakfast yet.
Speaker 2:What is going on so I was like, okay, this is so strange, I'd never had anything like that happen to me before anyway. So I got busy at work and then this beautiful blonde lady came into the office. I had a big wellness center and beauty spa in in South Africa. And so this beautiful woman comes in for a treatment and she's so bubbly and she's talking and and she says, oh, I had this incredible journey. I'm like, oh well, it sounds fantastic. You know what? What did you do? What journey were you on?
Speaker 2:and she's like, oh no, last year I entered, mrs south africa you have got to be kidding me like this is the third person on one day anyway, so talk about signs right.
Speaker 2:So then I drove home from work and I said oh, now I'm praying, I'm like, all right, God, if you really want me to enter into a beauty pageant, speak to me right, Like three times wasn't enough, I'm going to need a fourth sign for a beauty pageant. You're going to have to speak to me. Speak to me. And so, as I'm driving home, as I'm praying this prayer, my car radio switches over randomly to a new station, and whether I was on, a you know edge of a area.
Speaker 2:I don't know. You know, people can come up with all kinds of explanations. I just know I was listening to something. The next minute my radio flipped over to a new station and they started the interview. And she said oh, and here in studio today we have Mrs South Africa. And I just started this whole interview with a reigning Mrs South Africa at the time.
Speaker 1:So obviously that is a direct answer from God. This is like anything else, like you need another sign. Come on, let's get moving, let's get moving right and how good is god like?
Speaker 2:so he really wanted me into this modeling world and then say I had these four signs on one day and so I entered and um, and that's basically how I I started the modeling.
Speaker 1:So but you won three times. Of course you're gonna win, of course I think I sent my daughter the link and and your picture and I was telling her she's a model and she's won three times and my daughter's like, of course look at her like yes, you're of course, of course you're gonna win. You won um 2014, was it? Or 2016?
Speaker 2:so yeah, so interesting fact, I actually didn't win that year. Okay, where I got all the four signs, which was it's just a wonderful testimony really to say like, even if God, you know, gives you four signs for a direction, it doesn't mean it's always going to work out the way you think it is right. Um, so that year I didn't win, which was like heartbreaking for me. I couldn't believe it. I really thought I was gonna win.
Speaker 1:I was so shocked.
Speaker 2:You're like god, really you bring me here and I don't win what is going on kidding me after all this? Anyway, so yeah, I lost.
Speaker 2:But then the following year I did enter a different pageant, mrs Africa, which was an even bigger platform. And yeah, the organizers from the Mrs Africa, which is the whole continent, saw me in the previous competition and then they so they asked me to enter and so I won that. And then I won an international yeah, it's like a worldwide. It's called Mrs Universe TCP, so transcont continents across all the country, continents in the world. I, I'm one.
Speaker 1:Yes, wow, this didn't sound funny, but um, I was going through your story with my daughter and she's like mom, I gotta tell you I bet you they kidnapped her husband cuz they didn't see her. Oh my gosh, my husband is always like that. You would have spoken into death, like I would have given you back after a few days. No, like a beautiful narrative but yeah, you need to go we made a huge mistake so, wow, that was amazing. You get to win a couple of times, not only one, but a couple of times.
Speaker 2:That's beautiful and you know how amazing God is. He knows exactly where you should be and where you should go. And the paths that you should take to get you there, and sometimes we see something and we have this idea like this is the road, this is how I can see it working out.
Speaker 2:But then, God has a different plan working out right, but then god has a different plan. And so, like now, I I constantly tell myself luna, relax, trust the lord. I mean, he's proven himself so many times during my life I can, I can trust him I can trust god.
Speaker 2:Yes, even if things in front of us take a different path or a different turn. Even in that different turn, we can just know that everything is gonna work out perfectly. Yeah, we just know that. Yeah, because if I had won the 2014 pageant, I wouldn't have probably won the world pageant right, and I needed to win that world pageant to get the publicity in the platform and also to be able for me to also then, later on, immigrate to the United States. That's what I needed, you know, to get a credit card.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly people that had to see you were there. Exactly that was the path that I should have been on, and I wouldn't have done that, had I won the 2014 pageant. It's funny how God works, yep, how he connects us with the people that we need to be connected to.
Speaker 2:Exactly. We can just trust Him. Easier said than done right. Yeah, literally when we're in it, it's easier said than done, especially if you're a controlling type of person Like I, can see many ways for God to come through right. If he can just do this and this and this, I can see this happening, yeah. But then to sit back and wait and trust and have faith, yeah, it's not easy, it's not.
Speaker 1:And then you go and you decide to do an organization right. Yes, women Empower. What inspired you, how did you get the name and what inspired you to do that, and what does the organization do for women?
Speaker 2:So that was. I mean, I loved being a part of that because of my wellness center, my day spa. I had a training program who helped take women off the street.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Because there's a huge unemployment in South Africa and just people who are not able to go and study or learn a trade. So within the day spa we took in people and we would train them, give them massage, training, pedicures, manicures, facials, whatever, and we just helped them through a training program and then we would employ them or we would, you know, uh, other salons or wellness centers or spas would employ them through us or yeah. So we just had this whole empowerment center and then it kind of just grew into like a whole big non-profit with all the modeling and all the publicity and everything. It really just took off and it grew.
Speaker 2:So we um did a lot of image, um, consulting and growing for for women that really were out on the streets and were just suffering from a bad image about themselves, who really just didn't believe in themselves and know that god has got this wonderful plan for your life and that you are good and beautiful and worthy. So, yeah, we had this whole training program and we also provided women with washable sanitary wear. So in Africa especially, it's very, very poor, and so girls actually miss one week of school every single month because they're not able to buy san sanitary wear.
Speaker 2:So they would just stay away from school, right and so I think, imagine, like one week, every single month, how much work you miss because of that. And so, yeah, we had this whole program where we had woman making the washable sanitary wear and then we distributed all into all the rural communities. So it was wonderful, it was a beautiful, beautiful project.
Speaker 1:You're amazing. And how did you come up with the name Woman Empower?
Speaker 2:I don't know. I feel like there's just something spirit-led and something that God, just you know, popped up in my brain. It's like it's just because empowering women, if you empower, empower a woman, you'll empower a nation. Like woman is the heart of a nation, a mother, I mean. You know they always joke and say, yeah, you know, a man is the head, but the woman is the neck.
Speaker 2:Turn the head anyway, she wants to. It's his whole joke with that one Film, I think, big fat Greek wedding. Have you seen that? No, I wasn't, but that's a good one. And this guy said the man is the head, but the woman is the neck and she can turn the head anyway. That's a good one, it's so funny, but in a sense it's almost true, and not that I think that women should control or turn the brain or whatever I mean.
Speaker 2:you know, there's this beautiful structure about a man being the head and a woman being the support. It's beautiful and it's godly and people don't like to go there because they're like no women are equal, we are equal, but a woman is still you know that support, we are the support. Yeah, we're the helper, yeah but if the neck is broken there?
Speaker 2:the head has got nowhere to has no support exactly yeah, and that's why, if we can empower women, the more powerful and empowered and women are men. That empowers a nation. So, yeah, that's just how I got you know that name, and then you also have acting skills how did that door open?
Speaker 1:I mean, yeah, guys, you've seen everything I've mentioned like how did that door open for acting?
Speaker 2:oh interesting right, yeah, so I also started acting later in life, um, with winning the world title and all that again. You know, I was um just seen by um some, and they had this whole acting thing going on at the New York Acting Film Academy and so, yeah, I won a scholarship and I went. I went to New York to the Film and Acting Academy and I loved it.
Speaker 2:And then after that I did my first film in South Africa, which was wonderful, and then after that I did my first film in South Africa, which was wonderful. I acted in a few series and soapies also national soapies and all kinds of things.
Speaker 1:I love it.
Speaker 2:I wouldn't say I'm one of the best actors in the world, but I really enjoy it.
Speaker 1:But you dared to do it, I dared to do it yes, the little girl that wouldn't stand in front of the class and will know now you're acting and all of this great stuff, Wow.
Speaker 2:And that's just the power of God, right, that's how God can come and just rectify. I love that scripture that says in our weakness God's strength works best.
Speaker 1:Yep.
Speaker 2:And that's like for me, my life is such a testament of God and of His strength, because everything that everywhere I was weak, god came and he just turned it around into something beautiful. So, yeah, god can do all things, all things through christ.
Speaker 1:She's also a motivational speaker. We're gonna um provide her information here, so if anybody wants to invite her and tell me, how was that like? How did that come to be?
Speaker 2:yeah, I think, just my stories. You know that God has has been through us, with us, through so much. Um, people have just started asking me to speak at different events and then I think, with the modeling, especially in South Africa, right, uh, the publicity that came with all that, I just started speaking it. I was invited to events and in it to help how that came about and and now I love it. I love standing on a stage telling my story. I'm not scared, it doesn't even. You know, not even a little bit.
Speaker 2:I'm not even freaked out, even a little bit, which is amazing again it's beautiful because you empower everyone with your story like, not only women.
Speaker 1:You empower everyone like you know men, teenagers, everybody you're very, very impressive woman and then I am your TV show that man.
Speaker 2:I love that. What an honor. I mean, you know you're a journalist and you're a host and a talk show host. And what an honor would be able to do a talk show on cjc network, so yeah they are in california and um. They are all around the world and we're all do you have to travel to?
Speaker 1:california to do the show thankfully no, so we record the shows in in florida orlando and coco beach and wherever depending, sometimes I travel to all.
Speaker 2:I mean, I've been all over the country, all over the world. Actually I've interviewed people, so it depends where we are and we just do the interviews and send them off to the network and so, yeah, it's beautiful, it's on YouTube as well, if they don't catch the live show and it's just aired Monday nights, yes. Monday nights at 7pm.
Speaker 1:Right, okay, I saw a couple of them yesterday.
Speaker 2:I was like I told you today, yes, I really was.
Speaker 1:And then I understand that recently something happened with one of your daughters and there's like a miracle in the oven Right, another one, another one.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my life is always. There's always something. Yeah, I mean, this was so bizarre my middle daughter. She was sitting in school, she was just, you know, in class and she suddenly got this enormous headache, which we had no idea where this was coming from, whatever. So she phones me and she never. She never cries, she's never sick, she's just one of those kids, she's just smooth sailing, right. And so when she phoned me, I knew like this child is sick, like there's something seriously wrong.
Speaker 1:Yeah, something serious.
Speaker 2:So I went to pick her up from school. It took us about a week being, you know, in and out different hospitals, doctors, and we couldn't find out what was wrong. But eventually she was rushed off, did some CT scans and they found that she had a very large rupture in an AVM. So AVM is like an arteriovenous mole formation, so it's a lot of veins that form in your brain with birth like a malformation that shouldn't be there, and then at some stage in your life it usually ruptures. So with the size of an ABM like that, usually that's fatal If that ruptures, you know. So the fact that again, that she was alive from the rupture is just a miracle, and then for them to be able to take that out was again another miracle.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's walking and talking and singing and everything normal. Yeah, she's absolutely.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we did have a month in ICU. She was in ICU for about a month, but again, god is so good, like when we finally found out what was wrong with her at that time. She was just placed over to Orlando Health Medical Center, which is where the doctor that's there is actually a specialist in AVM. Avm is such a rare thing. What's the odds of landing up with a specialist in something so rare? And again, god just had us at the right place at the right time, uh, to have this miracle working man operate on my daughter's brain. And so after the surgery, they initially said that she'll, you know, it'll probably take about one to five years for her to regain, um, you know, speech and mobility and all kinds of things, because with such a big surgery in your brain, it's just huge. So she wasn't waking up the way we thought, but it's been two months, she's walking, talking, driving and she's back in school.
Speaker 1:She's learning junior. It's a miracle there's nothing going to stop her.
Speaker 2:It's a miracle, there's nothing going to stop her. Yes, yeah, it's a miracle. And you know, during that whole month having a child in ICU anybody who's had that can probably relate it's horrifying and it's torturous and it's you know, your hands are cut off. There's nothing you can do but pray and trust God. And it's so easy to become anxious and and become stressed in that situation. But again, because of everything I learned while my husband was kidnapped and of everything that God showed me and retraining my brain, you know, holding on to those positive thoughts and positive speaking and praying and believing and having faith and knowing that that's a choice, not a feeling we were able and I was able to get through this whole month in ICU not knowing whether she was going to make it or live, or even after she lived, how she was going to recover.
Speaker 2:And you know, we're just doing so well again and I believe it's because we have kind of grasped this understanding of choosing faith and training your brain to believe that, even besides the facts that you can see in front of you, there's just such value in that it's really living a higher life. You know, and I'm so grateful that God showed me this way to live higher life. You know, and I'm so grateful that god showed me this way.
Speaker 1:Yeah, my daughter, she had her baby preemie, and he had to be in the icu for a while and she was like, oh, mom, he's in icu.
Speaker 2:And she was like kind of like frustrated and I told her baby jesus is telling you, I see you you're in that intimate silent moment with god.
Speaker 1:You have nothing else to do but to trust the lord pray over the baby like jesus is telling you I see you this is your moment yeah, when I told her that she's like, oh, like, it clicked and she it, changed her whole perspective.
Speaker 2:So, exactly, because you can. You're gonna go through the like I had a whole month in ICU. You're going to go through that time, whether you're going through it in fear and anxiety and stress, or whether you go through it with peace and faith and strength. You can't go through it both. You know it's either this belief or it's the other one.
Speaker 2:And so there's a choice constantly, and sometimes you choose like I'm gonna have faith and then something happens in the faith buckles and that's okay. But then we have to understand that it's again. You have to make that choice and say, right, I am gonna stand up and and at one stage I even realized, like my child could die now, like this is not looking good, um, and I again, I chose to believe that, even if she does die, that god is still going to be with me, yeah, and he is going to strengthen me, he is going to get me through this. It's a choice to believe that god is enough, yeah, and that is what gives you peace, and then the devil really can't take anything from us.
Speaker 1:He tries, even if we die, we'll be in heaven, like that's the thing that. God says Even death is a winning in God.
Speaker 2:Whether I live or whether I die. It's a win for me and once we understand that and grasp that, what an incredible life we can live without having all the fear and anxiety all the time.
Speaker 1:It's wonderful, literally you. You said something um on your website, um, you used you. Oh, you put fear is a choice. Fear is a choice what advice can you give today to everyone that's watching about fear?
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know it sounds like such a far-off saying to say fear is a choice when you feel anxious. It doesn't seem like you chose to get there Right. It's like how can you tell?
Speaker 2:me fear is a choice. Are you crazy, you know? But honestly, the only thing I can say is that to understand the fact that fear is a choice is already power, because if you understand that you can choose fear, you can also understand that you can choose faith and that it is a choice, and that it is hard work hanging on to faith, work hanging on to faith, but that if you do that, if you do the work, if you're putting the self growth and the work to have, you know, build your faith and strengthen those muscles of faith and mindsets and speaking words of faith, and there is such a value in that, and then it's a constant thing. I mean, we'll go through our lives and know things will be going well and you'll think, oh no, I've conquered this whole faith thing, but yeah, things are going to happen again and things might go wrong again, and you just keep on pushing towards choosing faith and being hopeful and positive and there's just such power in that.
Speaker 2:So yeah, don't stop, keep pushing, choose faith Choose faith. Choose faith.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's so beautiful. Yeah, I read it yesterday and I was like, wow, it's true, fear is a choice.
Speaker 2:We just don't always realize, yeah, we just think that that's the obvious feeling to go with, or we get caught up in the moment.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we get caught up in the moment and we're seeing everything that's in front of us, and that's the part where it gets kind of tricky.
Speaker 2:It's tricky and it's hard work to choose the other way, but you can do that it's so empowering. It's like Peter when he said oh Jesus, make me walk towards you. Jesus is like yeah come.
Speaker 1:Peter started walking on water, but jesus didn't calm the storm, no, no. So.
Speaker 2:So when peter got distracted, seeing everything in front of him, yeah, you see, that's the thing is, he got distracted because he started looking at his circumstances right, and then that brought fear and you have fear. It takes away your faith, and so we can walk on water no matter what the circumstances around us. We can walk on water if we keep our eyes on Jesus all the time, but then it's just a tricky thing that our eyes naturally want to go towards the circumstances and so just put them back onto Jesus, right, because he's the author of all the success. He's powerful, he's able and if we trust in him, it's just so powerful.
Speaker 1:It changed my life Really. Yeah, and I see from your beginning 180-degree shift. You're so beautiful, you're so empowered, you're so beautiful, you're so empowered you're so wise you're amazing, it's an honor and a privilege to have you here today, and I thank you so much for sharing your story with us, because this is what it's about sharing our stories, building the faith of others and being as transparent as we can. Like hey, we go through it, but we choose faith.
Speaker 2:Exactly Not fear, that's beautiful.