Ep54 LIFE Lessons: Just Because you Haven't Been to Jail Doesn't Mean Your A Good Person

I’m gonna start this with a quote from my wise Co-Host “Some people are really good actors until you hit record.” Drs are some of the best……”Here try this, see how you feel and come back in a month"  you go home look up the side effects for this medication that’s an ANTI depressant and one of the side of effects are increased urge to “hurt yourself” or worsened depression. It’s sad when you look up the studies done on these medications. It’s astonishing that most of the medications were even approved by the FDC. It all comes down to that mighty dollar.

This week, we’re diving headfirst into relationships and this jungle we call mental health. Imagine trying over 20 SSRIs and seeing 12 different psychiatrists, only to still feel like you’re chasing your tail. We share personal stories of misdiagnoses and the long-awaited relief of finally finding the right mental health professional who actually listens. IMAGINE: being taken away from your family and friends and not knowing when you'll see them again. 
T$@&&That's where the harsh reality of life after a three-year prison sentence comes in for me. Or KDG being held in county jail for over a year not knowing if he would be goingw away for 15 years! We open up about out ongoing struggle with PTSD and panic disorders. It’s a raw, unfiltered look at the fight for peace of mind and stability in a world that doesn’t make it easy. Like KDG says $5 dollars for a tomato!
Speaking of KDG…. I am so happy to welcome my new co host and long time friend mr KD mother F’n G.  He has opened my eyes in ways you cant imagine. Hes a wonderful man and I cant wait for everyone to get to know him. 
And THEN: We once and for all  straighten the things out and take you back to that fateful night that changed Getting Out forever. Picture this 📸Bad Friends LIVE, Atlantic City, vague chaos, ONE HUGE ethical dilemma, and then of course, an emotional fallout. It’s a story with a happy beginning and a sad ending to a once great and now memorable chapter. BUT
Listen, no matter what there will be a new episode of GO EVERY  Wednesday and if its not on Apple or Spotify thats just because I changed the title, or the description and it sometimes takes 24 hrs to update but you can always find us on BUZZSPROUT
I have been trying my best to figure out a way to  keep posting some shorts and highlights on our YouTube channel while keeping up with our episode videos and I think I have cracked the code.  We will see? Im an audio guy, 🤷‍♂️ …..not anymore it seems lol. I promise I am doing  EVERYTHING in my power to make that happen. 
If you want some back story listen or watch me after 48 hrs of no sleep go to EP34. That night was the catalyst for the changes that have occurred here. Thing is are there 2 sides to every story or are there 3?
We invite our listeners to engage with us by sharing their own stories,! T

Transcript

KDG: 0:00

Exactly, that's right. That's me, kdg, that's me, let's go, and you just know it. Yeah, I know it.

Jesse: 0:07

And you tell yourself, you look yourself in the mirror and you say what, every day, I say I'm KDG. That's what we all gotta do, I think right.

KDG: 0:14

I think all of us do.

Jesse: 0:15

Look at ourselves in the mirror and be like, yeah, we got this shit today. We got it today. Because, we'll rule the world.

KDG: 0:27

We will One day. Let's start this bitch.

Jesse: 0:28

Yeah, let's do this.

KDG: 0:29

You guys ready.

Jesse: 0:42

Let's go there. It is Welcome who it is.

KDG: 0:44

Welcome welcome.

Jesse: 0:47

What's up, friends and fam.

KDG: 0:51

We're back, we are back.

Jesse: 0:54

You know, getting Out Podcast, trying to, trying to get things Smoothed out Situated. You know, hell yeah, we had a little dinner, sat down, talked, smoothed out, situated. You know, hell yeah, we had we ate a little dinner, sat down, talked had a little hard talk, talked about a lot, a lot of stuff about life.

Jesse: 1:14

Yeah, we had. We had a lot of things that, um, we didn't realize we were both going through at the same time. Yeah, and it's good to know we were both going through it at the same time. Yeah, and it's good to know that I have a guy by my side that actually understands, and when I talk about it, you've been through it so that you know that's not bullshit.

KDG: 1:39

Well, because it's hard to.

Jesse: 1:41

It's hard to know, it's hard to hear.

KDG: 1:43

A lot of people won't understand. It's deep shit, you know, and there's certain people that would understand. Those are the ones that you stay close to. Those are your friends, right?

Jesse: 1:56

I thought, yep, friends, I thought so, yes, yes, but it also comes down to a matter of taking someone's word after a certain amount of time. There's a lot of shit right now that's bothering me and I just want to set the levels, set the story straight. There is no competition. It's a story straight. There is no competition. There is no between friends ever and family ever. There is a couple of friends and family members that I don't talk to anymore and I haven't talked to in years. Okay, I'm talking about like close family members, um, and I still don't go out there and like say anything. That's false right like I don't.

Jesse: 2:58

I I will, I'll always praise them for what they do, for, like, for the good things that they've done. I never, like I won't go out of my way to talk shit about them, right right. There's no reason to like, it's none of anyone's business and it's a waste of energy yes, especially if they're friends, family and like, or they said they were, or blood. You know blood. Like I, like, I thought blood was a. Especially when you're Italian, blood means a lot. It does it really does yeah.

Jesse: 3:30

It should mean a lot to everybody. Fuck, just being Italian.

KDG: 3:33

Yeah.

Jesse: 3:34

Should mean a lot for everybody, but a lot of Italians, they think. Because you have an Italian dad.

KDG: 3:38

Yeah, and he really made me who I am and a lot of people like me.

Jesse: 3:43

Everyone likes you, Kevin. I love you. You're awesome. What'd they say to us today in the supermarket?

KDG: 3:49

Oh yeah, so me and Jesse are walking in our shop, right?

Jesse: 3:51

The fucking biggest shop right I've ever seen in my entire life. I thought I was going to get lost, which is something else we have to talk about. I'm going to fucking write that down, kevin Write that downesse's gotta talk about shop right. So because me and kev have horrible memories, like a goldfish.

KDG: 4:10

Yeah, just like a goldfish. I love it, though. Look at me, yeah wait, what's my name?

Jesse: 4:17

wait, gee, is there g in it? I thought there was, oh, but yeah. So we were walking around the supermarket and they look at us and like I asked the guy where the Liquid IV is and he goes like, look at me, weird. And I was like, yeah, like it's like a packet you put in your drink. He goes yeah, but give me the brand. Give me the name. Yeah, and I said Liquid IV.

KDG: 4:42

Oh, that's the name. Yeah, oh, I didn't know that was the name. Oh, you're so silly. Okay, yeah, let's go. Let's go now.

Jesse: 4:50

But I said, yeah, that's the thing. I was like do you watch any podcasts? Because they're like a big podcast box, of course yeah. And he goes why? Yeah, we actually do he goes. Yeah, I knew it, he goes. You guys look like perfect podcast characters. Wow, I look like a podcast. I was like, oh shit, that's crazy.

KDG: 5:12

That was good. It made me feel good. It made me feel really good dude.

Jesse: 5:15

That's awesome. Yeah, so, but like, yeah, that fucking store was gigantic and I used to work at the old one.

KDG: 5:21

And when he says gigantic, our one is drinks, and then our five is like pizza, and then our nine is like drinks again.

Jesse: 5:32

It's like they ran out of shit to put on it and they're like let's start over, I guess.

KDG: 5:38

We got drinks over there and over there. If you don't see, we got a water fountain.

Jesse: 5:42

Yeah, like we can start over, I guess. Like let's put our whole inventory on the shelves so we don't have to. That's actually pretty smart because, you're not really it's. You're not paying shelf stock, like you know what I mean, just moving shit forward.

KDG: 5:59

But there's a lot of shit that, like I don't know it's a lot of shit that, like I don't know it's a lot of stuff, dude, Because my job, as when I was there, like my job was to be, I was customer service. Right.

Jesse: 6:12

So people would walk up return shit to me.

KDG: 6:14

Yeah.

Jesse: 6:16

And I'd put the shit away, put it back in the cart, right? I'd wait for a couple of hours until I had enough shit and it was not so busy, exactly and then I'd go around the store and find the spot for each individual item Right and place it back on the shelf. There you go. The store was like one one-hundredth the size of the one that we went in, and I am not bullshitting you. Wow, that's a walk, the one that we drove. And I am not bullshitting you. Wow, that's a walk, the one that we drove past. It's there on the right side.

Jesse: 6:48

It was literally right across the street from the one that we were on oh, wow, okay, it's a ghetto build Like literally falling apart. Everyone who walked in there loved it because it was like a ghetto shop right. Oh yeah, it's like the last of its kind, shoprite gang. Yeah, shoprite gang, but yeah, so they're building a Shake Shack over here. They're building a Target's already there.

KDG: 7:16

You know everything that was for it. That was like oh my God, why is there not a Sonic over here? Now everybody's coming towards us because they suck over there. I know it's crazy.

Jesse: 7:26

That's where the money is they're just building everything everywhere, yeah, taking up land anywhere that they fucking can you know what sucks?

KDG: 7:33

people are gonna die and they're not gonna have enough room to bury people ugh, yeah, mmm, mmm because it's all about money, but they're not just about that probably start just burying people on top of each other. Kev no they're going to start femating people, even when you say it's going to be a law.

Jesse: 7:48

Ah and you'll never know. Yeah, how the fuck will you know?

KDG: 7:51

no, you're going to know it's just going to be a law, because it's not going to be enough it's going to be illegal to bury.

Jesse: 7:59

They're going to make up Kev, kdg, kbg. Yeah, the Prophet.

KDG: 8:05

Oh, I like that.

Jesse: 8:06

The Prophet. Okay, yeah, prophet KDG yeah.

KDG: 8:08

Alright, you can go with that.

Jesse: 8:09

You can go with that. I like that, yeah, okay. So, um, yeah, no, just I just wanna. I'm just Upset lately Because, um, I haven't told many people this, uh, and the show is all about Getting shit. Because I haven't told many people this, and the show is all about getting shit out. Getting out, yeah, letting people know what we've been through Hopefully help others.

KDG: 8:41

That's the main thing.

Jesse: 8:43

That's really what it is. You've been know, you've been through fucking crazy shit and you know what.

KDG: 8:46

I'm happy that I know why God put me on this earth. And a lot of people don't know that answer for them. But I know the answer and I do it and that's why I'm nice and that's why I help other people out. You know, I even put on my Facebook post I said said you don't like me, then fuck off, I'm not here for you.

Jesse: 9:05

To you know yeah, and like I, for instance, um, because you're so nice and that I have been like helping you the same way that I've helped the other people that were on my podcast yeah the one that I've been paid for for a year and a half out of my own pocket yeah and my mom's pocket when I lost my job okay and open up credit cards to keep this going when my computer screen cracked yeah yeah that buying a brand new oh, through opening credit card, buying a brand new computer to keep this shit going right you know, yeah her doing that for me because my credit sucks, yeah, so she helped to build my credit yeah so it was like a we're like, okay, we've tried to look at some benefit and we did a lot and I tried to do as much as I possibly could to make this work right.

Jesse: 10:07

And I still am so this comes back to something that recently happened, so I told you. Well, we were talking about this earlier. I've been prescribed over like 35 SSRIs my entire life, right, okay, and I've seen probably about 12 35 SSRIs my entire life Right, okay, and I've seen probably about 12 psychiatrists, right, and none of them work Of course, none of them have done anything. A couple of them cause withdrawal that were worse than my heroin withdrawal, which is absolutely crazy.

Jesse: 10:42

Yeah, talk about sick, huh yeah, and they prescribe it like it's fucking candy, like they give out crazy, yeah, talk about sick, huh yeah, and they prescribe it like it's fucking candy.

KDG: 10:47

Like they give out samples.

Jesse: 10:48

Yeah, and it doesn't work.

KDG: 10:50

You shouldn't expect results for about two to three weeks, oh okay, so there's a waiting game, nice. So what do you take it every three weeks, or something?

Jesse: 11:01

No, you take it every day and you have to wait and see if it works, and it's a guinea pig thing. So, like it's like I, I my. So I went, finally got to this one psychiatrist, yeah, because I couldn't understand. I wasn't, I'm still, I'm not, I'm not sleeping, I'm not. My shoulders messed up, right, okay, yeah, but it's getting to the point where it's not even the shoulder anymore, it's. There's something going on. I'm like in my head yeah, right, yeah. And if you know me like the people I'm not trying to say names, if you know, if you know me like the few people who do, and it had been sitting in seats like that I've had a lot of people sitting in these seats, of course, and they know that I have done some crazy stuff to my body.

KDG: 11:58

Yeah, you know, and Takes a toll on you, yeah.

Jesse: 12:03

And they should believe me enough and see, be able to see it you know and trust that, like I'm not doing anything wrong, like everything that I'm doing, I tell you I'm so open about everything that I was doing and I still am, and from multiple people I've been told this. Like you seem like you're keeping something from me, something like something off, something off like I'm not sleeping dude, like yeah, I have something's going on.

Jesse: 12:49

I don't I don't know what it is. Man, like there's something wrong. I'm afraid to pick up my phone for some reason. Some shit's going on. I got kev. I haven't told this to a lot of people, yeah all right I haven't said this to a lot of people and I finally found a psychiatrist that would listen to me, right, and we were on the phone.

Jesse: 13:09

It was like a telehealth thing, right for like two hours okay, I'm glad yeah, and she put my drug history to the side for the first time ever. Okay, she said, let's stop with the drugs. All right, she goes, let's just go back through your life, right? You told me how you were in high school, all the things that you did throughout your life. You know, yeah, she has all. And now she's the one doctor she's looking back at everything. She sees how many medications that I've been written and she finally believes me. Like finally is like wow. Yeah, this kid was used as a guinea pig. Like this kid really was just given something. I was diagnosed as bipolar.

KDG: 14:03

I'm not bipolar, no, they're just giving you extra shit. I was diagnosed as bipolar. I'm not bipolar. No, they're just giving you extra shit. That's what they do. They say, okay, well, we're going to subscribe you a la Checho. That's like two shits right there that you have to take in one day, but it's going to fuck up your life in the past.

Jesse: 14:17

The psychiatrist is the one I saw right before the one. I went to because I saw one before that. Yeah, because I was trying to find the right one that would sit and talk to me, not one that would just be like 20 minutes gone. So I sat down with her and the other one said that I had ADD. Oh, okay, I was like no, you don't understand. I was like I get it. I was like I do have trouble focusing on certain things yeah. But it's because I'm so anxious.

Jesse: 14:51

And I'm so, and I don't know what it is, I get nervous and I have very good hearing from doing music and producing, of course, and especially doing the podcast. Oh yeah, I hear little things. You like I'll sit with the audio for hours and for like, I gotta get it right you know like maybe OCD, not 80 oh yeah, ocd.

KDG: 15:16

Definitely that's what it is.

Jesse: 15:18

Yeah, we got OCD maybe that, but so we started getting you and Ryan. There you go, there it is. So I tell her my history and I open up to her and I tell her about prison. I really tell her about prison and I don't make a joke out of it. How it's. You know, this is funny. Like I can look back at it and laugh and all that shit, but like I start thinking about it as I'm talking about it and as I'm talking about it like we do on this podcast, because this podcast is really like a therapy session.

KDG: 15:59

It really is, yes, right, but I'm no therapist. Okay, but like, as you talk, what you kind of figure it out.

Jesse: 16:10

Yes, you, yep, as you get to talk and say it out loud yep your brain kind of like oh shit yeah did I like when we were outside and I was like everyone thinks the grass is greener on the other side yeah, or farther, but it's just, it's just farther away. Yeah, it's all it is. It just looks like it is, but it's farther away. That's it. When you get there, it's the same fucking grass that you had yeah right over here.

Jesse: 16:37

Man, yeah, you know, and it's like you realize, like things when you talk, yep, and that's like what she said too. So she's like I want you to talk to me. I want you to tell me, like, what happened when you talk, and that's what she said too. So she's like I want you to talk to me. I want you to tell me what happened when you got there. How did you get? Why did you go to prison?

Jesse: 16:52

You don't seem someone that would be, someone that would be. You don't seem like a felon. You don't seem like someone that would hurt anybody. So it's obviously, it's obviously something that had to do with your drug use. But what happened in prison? Because obviously what happened in prison changed. You're different now Because you've used drugs and gotten clean before, and it wasn't the drugs, because you were good and your brain wasn't foggy and all this shit, like what's going on, you know.

Jesse: 17:34

So I told her the whole fucking thing. Like I don't know if any of you guys know, but they do count, right. Yeah, every like what Hour? I think it is Every two hours.

Jesse: 17:47

You might have a cool CO that will just tap on the door or not even do anything and just look in the window, yeah, but at night you know about this, since overdoses and since about, like, the drug use and stuff like that they have to see you move and some of them are pissed off that they work there and their life sucks and they're miserable, but they don't realize that you're stuck in a fucking cell and you're sleeping but they're working. So they go around to each cell and they have boots on, army boots, yep. And they, what do they do that? Drop, kick your door, fucking boom, yep. Middle of the night and you're dreaming whatever, and you wake up to a fucking shaking room and it's a CO outside looking into your room smiling right, yeah, shit like that and that's every day, every hour. Yeah, you don't know when you're going to hear something like that happen ever.

Jesse: 18:57

I moved in three years, two years, eight months. I moved 12 different times. She said two moves. She said I dealt with a lot of prisoners, ex-prisoners and a lot of ex-felons. She goes two moves is considered traumatic.

KDG: 19:23

It would change your life.

Jesse: 19:25

She goes you're with. One move is already. You left your family and when I got put in prison, I didn't even know I was going. I had no idea I was going. I didn't know I was leaving for five years, yeah, I didn't know I would never see my family again, except one time for almost three years. I know I was in a five year sentence, kev, so that was traumatizing One, of course. Five years Having to build this barrier in my brain that's impossible. All the fights that I've gotten into for no reason, the things I've seen people do to other people it's stressful and I don't like watching boxing and MMA. I'm not a violent person, dude. I deal with things with my words. If you can't deal with things with your words, you're not an adult. Maybe when I was 10, I would have threw sand at you and kicked you in the balls, but right now I'm a 34-year-old man and if we have to deal things with our fists, then there's something wrong here. Right, I'm about to get a prick. Yo, stop, yeah.

Jesse: 20:39

You're going back to. You're going back to jail. What did I say? You're going to jail, oh you're going to jail.

KDG: 20:45

I'm going to jail.

Jesse: 20:47

I'm going to jail. So I was. So she finally listened to me and I told her everything. So I was diagnosed with PTSD. I have severe panic disorder. That's why I do it like I'm afraid of the phone, and the reason I don't sleep a lot is because of the count thing. I'm used to waking up every hour, dude, and I bought that whoop thing. I didn't buy it, I bought the trial thing for the week the trial thing Okay.

Jesse: 21:27

You know, I tried the trial to see how it is and when I was, when Carmen was here, I told her I was telling her about the whoop. I was all about it, right, because I wanted to prove to everybody like yo, like this is like I'm trying, like it tells you what time you go me dude, people were like well, my mom and dad believed me, the, the people who actually saw me like, like we're actually like my brother knows the people who see me in pain.

Jesse: 21:51

No, they believed me yeah and they, uh, see this, I was just talking about fucking damn it. Um, none of them believed me enough that I had to prove myself. So I got that whoop bracelet to do that. So the whoop bracelet showed I was waking up every 1.8 hours on the dot, every fucking night, kev, they were training you to wake up every time.

KDG: 22:23

That's all they do, co's. They train you, dot, every fucking night, kev, they were training you to wake up every time. Like that, that's all they do, ceos. They train you. They're training you. If they're in contact with you, kicking your door every day at 1 o'clock, whatever it is, they're training you to wake up. Then they don't have to do it. They can walk by and you're going to wake up and look in the window and be like, oh, it's just you.

Jesse: 22:46

It was an automatic thing because I moved my leg. That's how it was. You're absolutely right. I knew I just had to move my leg, fuck it.

KDG: 22:51

It happened to me. I hate it. I didn't even know I was going to be in jail for a year.

Jesse: 22:55

Just got to move this leg, even had a calendar. I made myself nah, that's the worst. I never made that shit, no way. I don't know I had to. I never even knew what day it was.

KDG: 23:08

I was a fast fan. I was like I need to get out of here. I can't do this. My mom that's the only thing that kept me going is my mom had visits with me yeah, you got visits, yeah.

Jesse: 23:20

So, yeah, three months in, I got locked up November 1st 2019. And that's my clean date and I saw my mom and dad. You're not allowed visits until you're three months in About a year, like two months in and I didn't get to prison until I was, because you know you go to jail county first and all that other shit.

KDG: 23:46

You have to wait.

Jesse: 23:47

Yes, In Middlesex. You don't get visits, you get like a phone call. They go to the jail and you get a video visit through a phone call. That's what I had, so bro how is that a?

KDG: 24:02

visit dude. It's just like a video chat. How is that a visit dude? It's just like a video chat. How is that a visit Kev? It's not that's all I had, though. That's all I could do. That's what I'm saying. What are you doing? That's crazy. My aunt was there too. It's good, I saw my aunt, you got to see them.

Jesse: 24:19

That's great, but I'm saying it would have been nice. I can't go down and say whatever.

KDG: 24:24

Middle sex was weird. I would have loved it. I saw my lawyer face to face. Which county were you in Tom's River?

Jesse: 24:31

Oh shit, I've never been to Tom's River.

KDG: 24:33

Thank God they have an old jail, and then they have a new jail.

Jesse: 24:38

Oh yeah, no, I heard about that.

KDG: 24:40

I heard about that.

Jesse: 24:46

They built the new one, right, yeah, but yeah, so this is called they built a new jail for you. What the fuck was I talking about? I don't even remember.

KDG: 24:56

Oh, no Anuiz.

Jesse: 24:59

I was trying to say that.

KDG: 25:03

You had a point.

Jesse: 25:04

I always have a fucking point dude, come on yeah. My points are always fucking like drilled Steve. Yeah, I had to fucking drill this whole fucking thing yesterday. Don't even get me fucking stoned.

KDG: 25:15

Yeah, fart like that shit yeah.

Jesse: 25:16

Yeah, so, all right, the loop bracelet. So I got the loop bracelet to try to show everybody, like, listen, like dude, I'm like, I am not fucking, I don't know what you guys think I'm on like there was that whole atlantic city episode. You can go back and watch it. Oh, wow, right, like I started telling you, I told you what happened. You did, yeah, you told me in the back and that's what happened honestly is none of anyone's business and and I will never tell like I won't say a bad word about him because he helped me out, but I will tell the real story of what happened to people who ask because it's getting spread the wrong way Like telephone right, yeah, whoa, yeah telephone.

Jesse: 26:02

Are you kidding me?

KDG: 26:03

Yeah.

Jesse: 26:05

Like I did everything in my power, like what is going on here, like that is not what happened, that is not the story, right? How is this going around the way it's going around?

KDG: 26:16

Right, exactly.

Jesse: 26:18

Bro, I'm getting like, and the reason why I'm really upset is because I have friends that are friends of mine. Yeah just as much as friends of people that have been on this show yeah they're unsubscribing because I they are being told lies, straight lies. I have kev, you know. I have receipts, yeah, to prove everything you showed me. Yes, and I'm talking about receipts in money, receipts in text messages.

Jesse: 26:50

I I never spoke a fucking bad word about them yeah and I never, ever asked them to do anything more than they were doing. Yeah, that's it. I just asked them to show up yeah that's it. The people who came in my ass to show up. That's it. And what happened? They disappeared for how long?

KDG: 27:16

I don't think I was here when they disappeared. No, you aren't no, you aren't.

Jesse: 27:19

They disappeared out of nowhere the day before and then, if anyone wants to know they wanted to stop doing this show, wants to know they wanted to stop doing this show every week and they wanted to make it a once every other week show or a once a month show. Once a month oh, it's a month, yeah you see once a month yeah, and I got chastised for wanting to keep doing it every week.

Jesse: 27:48

And I'm not here to make money.

Jesse: 27:51

I spend money and you know I spend. We almost had to stop the show because I couldn't pay the bills for how much it's costing. And a godsend happened today that I called up one of the companies because they overcharged me on one of the things, and it was just a miscommunication and I contacted the company and the guy was really nice and told him what was going on and I was on my way to pick you up and I I uh told them X, y, z. My card's been declined now, also because of the whole thing I told you about what happened in AC, taking about the cash advance being being left in AC at 4.30 in the morning by myself, you know, having like being told I was being taken to my car and watching out for my friend and being literally left by myself with a 6% battery and no cash in my pocket besides a credit card that I just opened up for a fucking computer that I'm not supposed to even be using, that I had to take a cash advance out for Whoa.

Jesse: 29:15

And then I have that person going around telling people I'm the reason that he got in trouble and I still owe money. Like what is going on, like dude, like what is. And then he went on a trip to Florida two days later and the boss did tell me he needed money for a lawyer because he had to take it out of his 401k if he didn't.

KDG: 29:42

Do you give him any money? Yeah, how much did you give him?

Jesse: 29:45

It took $250,000. I said like bro, because he helped me. I said, of course I'll try, like I don't know, what else do you want me to do right now? Right, remember we had New Year's Eve shows the live shows planned. Yeah, I bought all this live gear stuff.

KDG: 30:00

Yeah, it was canceled.

Jesse: 30:01

Right, we were supposed to be paid for it. We never were, yeah.

KDG: 30:08

We never were yeah.

Jesse: 30:09

Free sponsors Right here, whole time yeah.

Jesse: 30:13

Yeah, right, yeah I don't give a shit what that is. That's free sponsor. That costs money, mm-hmm. I don't care if 10 people saw it, buddy, yeah, I don't care if 10 people saw it, buddy, yeah. But he also did the same for us. Yeah, right, mm-hmm, but don't go around spreading. Now you say he's spreading shit about me and that's I know. He is Like that's not right, that's not right. Like I was like five, I don't know, I was like eight days away from fucking graduating ISP bro, yeah, it's fucked.

Jesse: 30:56

Oh no, I'm sorry, I just graduated, I think I think I already graduated.

KDG: 31:02

I think it was like just graduated ISP. It's still worse. That's what I'm saying.

Jesse: 31:04

It's even worse. Yeah, what I'm saying. It's even worse. Yeah, I was petrified, I didn't know what to do. You're stealing my car, ball of hammer.

KDG: 31:14

You sound like.

Jesse: 31:14

Alex, what would you do? All right, can I ask you a question? Let me ask you a question. I'm not naming names or anything if your best friend, someone that you really like, you admire, helps you out when you needed it, when you really needed it, like fucking. Helps you out. Calls you out of the blue, let's chill. He gets hammered. I don't drink. Calls you out of the blue, let's chill. Okay, he gets hammered. I don't drink. Okay, almost gets arrested. I tell the cops I'll take the keys.

KDG: 31:56

There you go.

Jesse: 31:57

I'll drive, don't worry, I got him. He's hammered.

KDG: 31:58

Come on.

Jesse: 32:04

Bring him to his car, right yeah, now it's 3.30 in the morning In Atlantic City. Oh gosh, I see, now I'm. I'm observing. Yeah, I have to be dude.

KDG: 32:16

Yeah, I have to be. That's your job Security.

Jesse: 32:21

Ow Looking to the. I look to the front in the parking lot man. In the front there's a cop.

KDG: 32:28

To the left, there's a cop. To the right, there's a fucking cop. Yeah.

Jesse: 32:33

Now there's a girl in the trunk stealing shit out of his car while he's yelling at me oh wow, because I know her bag's in the front. Why is she in the fucking trunk?

KDG: 32:47

And how did she get a trunk open? Because she has the car's open.

Jesse: 32:51

I opened the car, you know what I mean.

KDG: 32:53

I had the keys, I just went.

Jesse: 32:54

Damn yeah. So I'm about to get in the car Driver's seat door. And what happens If your friend tells you no, you are not driving my car. Give me my keys right now.

KDG: 33:14

Well, what I would do is I would say, no, you are hammered and you can kill yourself. If he didn't listen, then I would have just yeah, what would you have done? I would have threw the keys. I would have. Just yeah, what would you have done? I would've. I would've threw the keys I would've got, I would've threw them as far as I could. Thank you in the woods there was no woods.

Jesse: 33:31

We're in. Lennox, but wherever it is, you know I would've covered them, but but you're missing a factor yeah, what factor.

KDG: 33:39

I would've hit them in the car.

Jesse: 33:41

No, no no, no the factor.

KDG: 33:46

Oh, the shoulder, yeah, yeah, you can't, which you know like it was like a non. No one believed that either which is like now I got, I found now I'm going to a spinal surgeon, so Right.

Jesse: 33:57

Yeah, and I go, and I'll go back into the other shit that we found out, that I told you about. That's ridiculous.

KDG: 34:05

I didn't even know it was possible Right Well, now that's going to change your life.

Jesse: 34:09

Oh my god, that's disgusting. Yeah, um so, yeah, um so. I did, that's what I did, but I couldn't throw it in the fire. You should have done it with the other was it both shoulders. But the thing is no, but it's the collar.

KDG: 34:27

Yeah, it's all that. It's like, even when you.

Jesse: 34:29

It's like, it's like a suspension. It's like when you walk, yeah, I still feel, yeah, like I swung at a fly today For like Like an idiot. Yeah, bro, in my eye, like Mr Miyagi, I went as fast as I fucking could and I, bro, mr Miyagi, I went as fast as I fucking could and I it hurt so bad, dude, like I almost fainted, but like I was like, I was like why the fuck did you just do that? I was like that's you don't. It's weird, I can't explain it. It's like when you you're other people know you're when you're in pain and you take like an anvil or something, yeah, which I have to do, especially after last night and trying to do all this shit that I did, yeah, I had, like I had movement a little bit in my arm again, you know, so.

Jesse: 35:23

So I forgot for a second. Well, that's not good. You forgot like real quick. It was like, oh, I could get this motherfucker. I was in, I was ready to pick you up. I was. You know what I mean Get this bitch, yeah. And I did it and I fucking hurt myself Like it's stupid, things like that, you know, yeah, yeah. So I throw the keys and you know, can't get home 6% battery, no money, 4.30 in the morning and I don't know if you know to get from Atlantic City to where we live. It's a minute. No, it's not a minute. There's nothing, no public transportation besides.

Jesse: 36:06

Oh, I'm thinking, yeah, I'm thinking you have a car, a car, my bad. Yeah, it's at the aberdeen train station. Yeah, wow, yeah, yeah, and well, you were promised you. You know I'm talking about me. This didn't happen to me you know, you were promised that you'd be taken back to your car again tonight because you wanted to get here for the podcast.

KDG: 36:29

You wanted to be here. I wanted to be here. You were promised. Promise is a promise.

Jesse: 36:37

Yeah, I got you. So as you pull away in the cab, you see him with the trunk open getting a DUI Right. I started crying, bro.

KDG: 36:53

Of course, because he's drunk. He doesn't. What would you have done? He's being blacked out. He was blacked out like the other day.

Jesse: 37:02

I would have started crying. This is what I meant. If that was, was driving away, and that's my boy, like that's how, that's how, like real this shit was to me yeah, that's your boy, yeah, that's my boy. How long I would have started crying, how long you know not that long, not that long, and he was still had a connection like that.

KDG: 37:17

Okay, that's it yeah, it was just a connection and a thing.

Jesse: 37:20

But the thing was you have a boy like that right and it's a connection Like you both understand each other.

KDG: 37:35

That's amazing.

Jesse: 37:36

Yeah, but it was one-sided.

KDG: 37:38

Yeah.

Jesse: 37:39

I don't think he trusted me as much as I trusted him.

KDG: 37:43

Yeah, because you guys didn't know each other, so you accepted.

Jesse: 37:46

I accepted it right from the rip because I wanted to learn from him.

KDG: 37:50

Right.

Jesse: 37:50

You know he was going to open his own business and do all this stuff. I wanted to learn from him. I wanted to. You know, I thought it could help us everyone out. Yeah, you know, I thought we could help right each other out, like that's my, that's what I would have thought. You know what I mean. That's what I'm trying to do for everybody. Like I said and like you said that outside kev, like I've been locked up and I've been in rehab and I come back out and I always try to start something and I always try to bring someone and people in with me. I don't try to do it by myself. I'm a dolphin. Oh, I didn't know you're a dolphin. That's awesome. We were talking about that before, yeah, and the whales?

Jesse: 38:35

No, you're the Yorker fucking killer whale. Apparently, you fucker. Let's go Orcas. You like the Orcas? Yeah, but I'm a dolphin, I'm a team player, bro.

KDG: 38:45

But dolphins, yeah, dolphins come together and they get the job done. Yeah, like I take your shit, bro.

Jesse: 38:51

We were at one of those live events all day. Yeah, one of those live events all day till 7pm, setting up by ourselves with my shoulder fucked up the next day, what happened? I got a fungal infection because I was sick, remember?

KDG: 39:11

I was like what the fuck's going on?

Jesse: 39:14

I got really sick. I didn't know what was going on and I got a fungal infection. Thank god I went to the doctor, found out that they said I could have died if I didn't.

KDG: 39:22

Yeah thank god you went to the doctor now how do I get a fungal infection?

Jesse: 39:32

I brush my teeth with fluoride free toothpaste there you go. I use organic like xylitol shit with my, my mouthwash right.

KDG: 39:44

Okay, yeah.

Jesse: 39:47

Which is look at me, guys, fucking amazing. If you get like those sores or shit in your mouth and you just put it in, let Kev do that. I'm telling you, let it sit. Even my mom, she didn't believe me. I told her. I was like try it. Yep, please try it next day. Shit's gone, yep. So I do all that shit for health. Only thing was that I wasn't drinking a lot of water, so they blamed it on dehydration, which could cause it. Which can cause it?

KDG: 40:22

It can cause a lot of things, so it was part of it, so it definitely was part of it.

Jesse: 40:27

Yep, yesterday, or like three days ago, right, mm-hmm, I go to clean my car and right, mm-hmm, I go to clean my car, and I've always had, like my window seal, right, I have a Mercedes Benz. People always say how nice it is. Yeah, it's the funny part, it needs a car washer.

KDG: 40:52

Yeah, maybe a new car, oh, so look, I'm trying to actually grow out there.

Jesse: 40:54

Kevin told me to try to grow out there. I'm trying to actually grow out the hair. Kevin told me to try to grow out the hair I'm trying Look, he's fucking. He told me to grow out the hair and then he shaves his little fuck.

KDG: 41:03

What challenge? Gave him some more hair, yeah, so you can look better than me you look good as hell. Look at him. Look at him. Look at the camera.

Jesse: 41:14

You look good as hell. You're looking good, ladies, and gentlemen, what is that pineapples?

KDG: 41:19

Pineapples Are those pineapples? I would say they are yeah those are fucking pineapples. Yeah, they're definitely pineapples, right yeah.

Jesse: 41:26

Yeah, they're definitely pineapples, okay, so what was I saying?

KDG: 41:33

Ah, my boy, my fucking boy, that's what I'm fucking talking about.

Jesse: 41:39

But, yeah. I forgot what I was talking about. Oh, the car. So I watched the car Window seal. Yep Doesn't close. Everyone thinks it's a nice car, yeah.

KDG: 41:48

But on the inside.

Jesse: 41:49

The leather's peeling. Yeah, it's a 1998 Mercedes-Benz SLK Yep AMG. Yeah, it was a nice car. It has 86,000 miles on it. That's it and it's a 98. Wow, yeah. So in my head I'm like yo, you can like, fucking, do, like that thing that they do on the car shits and re.

KDG: 42:21

Redo it, redo the whole thing. Yeah, make that shit new. Yeah, you can.

Jesse: 42:27

Boom, boom, boom, boom, make it fucking.

KDG: 42:31

Shiggy shiny. Okay, shiggy shiny, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, hell, yeah, man Shine the shit up.

Jesse: 42:36

Yeah, put it all, make it a fucking AI Mercedes.

KDG: 42:44

And you're lucky you have those rims on it.

Jesse: 42:47

Yeah, and that's the worst part about it, Kev, If you look close like they're fucking peeling off the paint's peeling off the rims and shit, there's paint on the rims. Bro. It's Like I said the grass is greener just because it looks farther away. The closer you get to my car, you realize the poorer I am. You know what I'm saying.

KDG: 43:05

Well, it doesn't mean you're poor.

Jesse: 43:07

I know, but that's what I'm talking about. You realize like, oh, that's dude, that guy's got a nice car. Yeah, he used to be. He used to have some money Now. Yeah, he used to be. He used to have some money, Now he doesn't. Yeah, he used to have some money.

KDG: 43:20

but not anymore. Well, at least he has a Mercedes.

Jesse: 43:23

Yeah, bro, people all the time walk by me like nice car. Wait till you see the inside, buddy. Yeah, it's beautiful, yeah, it's beautiful.

KDG: 43:36

Yeah.

Jesse: 43:36

So I took a little look on the side and remember I told you the OCD thing right with me. So I see green on like the crevice of this crack on my door and I also I told you how my brain kind of is like connecting dots that never has been connected before which is really fucking weird.

Jesse: 44:03

And I'm thinking about it, I'm thinking about it and I'm like whoa, wait, wait, wait, green. And then I look on the other side and it's not green. And I remember washing my car and I remember how the window doesn't really seal into the door unless you close it a certain way, really. So sometimes water gets inside the car.

Jesse: 44:30

Yeah, and it drips into the door, damn. And the door is like little, it's an old car, dude, yeah, it is. So it drips down into the window and it goes into the mechanics and into the panel, right. So I'm like, no, don't you fucking tell me, cause a couple of months ago, three doors down, they found out they had black mold in their fucking house, in their kitchen. The fuck was coming from upstairs. Yeah, so that's another thing. Alright, remind me about black mold and the Mercedes write that down, please, okay, so All right, remind me about black mold and the Mercedes.

Jesse: 45:18

Write that down, please Got you, okay. So I have been wanting to tell you guys forever, like you guys already know, that this is my room. Right, this is my room. I threw away my bed. I put a couch there. Don't worry, it turns into a bed. There you go. But I don't even really fucking turn into a bed, I just sleep on the couch. But I would have thrown the fucking bed away and turn and put a couch there if I like. This is how dedicated I am into doing this, to making this into like something that is for all of us right and like. I built this around for all of us. And you know, when I put that their initials on the wall, they looked at each other and they laughed really yeah, the initials, yeah I had.

Jesse: 46:14

So I had a the initials yeah, I had C-J-N on that wall and they looked at me and they laughed. Hmm, when you know, when you texted me, you said yo, that got me emotional, bro, it did, it got me emotional, you made me cry yeah. Yeah.

KDG: 46:32

You know what I'm saying, Like we're big babies.

Jesse: 46:33

Yeah, it's fine, you know, and like that's, like that made me feel good and like any and and other people are saying that I try, I'm trying to use you like I I don't know if anyone knows, but like I'm giving I have a macbook, I'm giving the fixing and giving to you so that he can help and and I'm producing your show, making it part of the channel so that maybe that you could go and do your own thing when you learn how to do it.

Jesse: 46:59

You know like we can help all each other out, yeah and like, and when you have your own show and it's on its own network, and then I you know what? I'm gonna say that's my boy's show, like awesome. I'm not gonna say, oh, that's my, that's my boy, we're competitors. Well, you know what?

KDG: 47:17

To be honest, you always can be competitors, but in a good way.

Jesse: 47:25

In a good way, but I'm not ever competing With my friends.

KDG: 47:33

No, because you actually have to try to compete.

Jesse: 47:35

You don't even think about that. Life is a competition on itself.

KDG: 47:36

It will be a competition my friends no because you actually have to try to compete. Yeah, you don't even.

Jesse: 47:37

Yes, no, it's just no if it's a competition on itself so it may be, it can be. It will be a competition if there's, if they're.

Jesse: 47:44

You're trying to prove something and I have nothing to prove to my best friend, because they should know already the person that I am and the person that who, the person that we are, you know and like I don't know, and I've just been hearing like I stole money from our Patreon, like, bro, we had $130 in our Patreon and I've been. That $130 covers one month of this bill, of our bills, and if you don't want to believe me, I'll post receipts. So, like you guys got like really Like just like you want to know the real story. That's why I wanted to bring this out there. Like we're going to start taking comments, leave comments, Ask questions. There you go. All right, yep, like somebody posted oh, this is bullshit, Not with you on, because we've been getting great views with you.

KDG: 48:39

Thank you, everybody Appreciate you.

Jesse: 48:40

Thank you Like this is bullshit. When Patwell was on.

KDG: 48:43

This is bullshit.

Jesse: 48:44

Where's Carmine? I was like I don't know Ask him.

KDG: 48:48

Right, I miss him, I miss him. I love him.

Jesse: 48:50

I love him to death. I love him, I do, but he just disappeared. That's not how I can do Like. I don't have a job, I can't work. This is what I'm trying.

KDG: 49:01

I'm trying to build something for myself, yeah.

Jesse: 49:04

So I have to rely on, be able to rely on people, right, you know, and if you're going to be a business partner with me, but you can't.

KDG: 49:13

You have to be. He probably needs a job.

Jesse: 49:16

Bro, I know that, and he didn't have to do anything besides show up for an hour.

KDG: 49:21

Exactly an hour.

Jesse: 49:26

Okay, or maybe three hours. Give me a day a week. There you go To try to live your dream and go out there and maybe get some roles. That was my I want, bro. I think Carmine's amazing at what he does. Yeah, I wouldn't mind, if he starts a podcast, I would fucking be the first one to subscribe, right.

KDG: 49:53

I'll definitely watch it.

Jesse: 49:54

But I'm not going to sit here and let him lie on me. I'm not going to let him sit here and tell other people like watch it. But I'm not going to sit here and let him lie on me. I'm not going to let him sit here and tell other people like, watch out.

KDG: 50:03

What was the first thing?

Jesse: 50:04

he said to you Kev Be honest.

KDG: 50:05

Be honest, be honest, I'm not going to be in the middle of this thing, but I know that. But I want you to be honest now. Kev With what.

Jesse: 50:10

What did he say about you Before we? Even when he left, he said what did he text you and say about me, saying that you know they Watch out for me and be careful.

KDG: 50:25

Be careful, watch out, yeah.

Jesse: 50:29

For what? For me trying to have you in my house and like I don't know what do I do besides pick you up, bring you to my house and like, feel like I don't know what do I do. What do I do besides pick? What do I do besides pick you up? Bring you to my house yeah we smoke, we eat. Yep, we have a good time we laugh. No, no, negativity, probably the computer hasn't even been fixed yet, so I've been trying to get yeah, so he's been helping me set up here you know, which has been.

Jesse: 51:03

That's rare, and it's just been like it's been fun again. Man Like I, I, I understand, because there's a lot of people I burp bridges with and like they're so cautious of me so they're telling other people you sure you want to do that with him. You sure you want to do that. You got to be careful and I understand that I get it. But it's either you're here, you're in, you're with me, or you're not. And when you said you were, you were yeah, and the one thing I asked is just one week day a week, that's it. Once a month, every other out of nowhere.

KDG: 51:52

And and it was just decided you should let it out, because you're talking about it. And now.

Jesse: 51:58

I'm pissed Like no Now, yeah, now, now it was just decided Tell him, tell him no, because that what's bothering you?

KDG: 52:05

That was. Why don't you? That was.

Jesse: 52:07

Because it was just decided. I was sent a text message on a Sunday, the day before we shoot. I'm not coming tomorrow. Okay, we're shooting every other week from now on. That's what he said. Oh, I will show you. Okay, I'm a lazy piece of shit.

Jesse: 52:32

Okay, I said, carmine, please, I know you're probably in a mood Right, like something like chill out a little bit. I got you Like I love you, please. Like I know you're probably in a mood Right, like something like chill out a little bit. I got you Like I love you, buddy, like let's calm down. Like I know, because he has diabetes, his blood sugar goes up and down and at night it's not good sometimes. So I know I was like bro, but that was your brother, that's my brother, my brother Exactly, and I don't like this fighting. I tried to settle it, bro. That's why I was so confused for so long, so confused. I gave my phone to like I, mom, can you, my brother, I'll give you, can you? I did give it to you and let you read the text messages. I was like yo, did I say anything bad in there once?

Jesse: 53:22

no all I asked was said like yo, let's just talk, bro, go do you, let's talk about it. I just think that you need to stop worrying about what other people think and just do you. Yeah, like we said we were going to do. Right, because I'm not going to lie. Every week he'd tell me criticism about how fucking high I looked or what this was, or how bad I was at that. Yeah, and every week I keep hearing it from someone else dude.

KDG: 54:00

It can get annoying.

Jesse: 54:02

Yeah, it doesn't get annoying, it hurts.

KDG: 54:04

How many people altogether that keep spreading around?

Jesse: 54:09

All the people that prefer him over me.

KDG: 54:14

Okay, that's a lot of people and that's most.

Jesse: 54:17

Yes, yeah, and that's most. Yes, yeah, and that's most. So, yeah, let's say, like friends that have I have known for probably longer than him, have unsubscribed. Why so I didn't say like I've been until now, have I ever said anything about him? No, you have not and even behind the scenes he just wants to forget about it.

KDG: 54:43

That's all I want. He doesn't want to bring your name up.

Jesse: 54:46

I just didn't want any negative, I just don't want to even talk about it, nothing. But I'm tired of finding out shit that I said to him that was like supposed to be between me and him, going to other people like that he has no right saying like absolutely at all, um, I'm just, like I'm just. I'm just, I'm very disappointed, man, like I'm disappointed that our friendship was just you're disappointed. Yeah.

KDG: 55:19

You know I'm disappointed.

Jesse: 55:22

I'm very disappointed that it was looked at like just eh well.

KDG: 55:27

I know, uh, I know two, uh two women that uh were friends with each other for 15 years and uh do it's like sisters, just like sisters. They hang out all the time, and I dated one of them.

Jesse: 55:45

Really.

KDG: 55:46

Yeah, and when I started dating her, they broke up. Those two friends broke up over some silly shit, and then, both sides, it's just like it's insane. She said this and she said that, but it's like it's the same story, but she's wrong. I'm on that side now. No, she's wrong, you know. And it's just like, okay, I can see that they're hurting because they love each other and they can say, oh, I hate her, I don't want to talk to her, I don't want her here, or you know. No, she's wrong. All that crap. You're saying that because you really do want to go to her and apologize, whatever it is, and make up and be family. So I can read people, even when they're just like happy, can?

Jesse: 56:32

I be completely honest, ken. Yeah, can I be completely honest, kev.

KDG: 56:34

Yeah.

Jesse: 56:37

I've heard and talked to enough people without even having, without bringing it up and not even trying to. Like you said, I don't even want to.

KDG: 56:48

Yeah, that's it.

Jesse: 56:49

It's still going to bother you that bothers me, when I hear shit that's fake. Yeah, that too. And false. Yeah, if someone's going to say fake and true If someone's going to drag your name through the mud.

KDG: 57:01

Mm-hmm.

Jesse: 57:03

My name's already muddy as shit. Yo my name literally dripping, dripping. It's still like you're still dripping, kev.

KDG: 57:13

Yeah.

Jesse: 57:13

And I graduated from ISP and the judges said that I am a fucking model ISP citizen.

KDG: 57:19

Oh.

Jesse: 57:20

Yeah, did everything that I had to do. I don't leave the fucking house Like what the fuck? I don't do shit. Yeah, he always thought I was. Everyone thought I was doing something Like. It was always like Jesse's gonna dude. All right, I'm gonna say something that's gonna. This is the will really bother me the most, and maybe our listeners can, because carmine is gonna have his own podcast and he can talk about all the shit that I was doing. Tell everybody, I'm sure, what he wants to tell, but as soon as I built all of this, what did he want to do?

Jesse: 58:03

you want to make a podcast, right? No, he wanted to bring all the stuff to his ad. Come on, kev, you don't. Yeah the podcast, yeah you want to bring this stuff that I just built and put it all, yeah, yeah, yeah, look, look that sign right behind you that I just put, that I measured out and bought for. Christmas for us. Got all that, the whole setup that you see behind us.

KDG: 58:25

You said there'll be more room up there. Yeah.

Jesse: 58:27

Oh yeah, just for room. That's it. I got the couch, but look how much room there is now. Kev, mm-hmm, it's, but look how much room there is now.

KDG: 58:36

Kev, they wouldn't wait though.

Jesse: 58:38

Just because I had to lift the bed, that was it. But I had to bring with my shoulder, bring my equipment back and forth.

KDG: 58:55

Or buy more equipment just so we have. I could have done it back and forth, I would have no problem with it.

Jesse: 58:59

Kev. Bullshit, bullshit, 100%, 100%, okay, 100%. How would you have done it?

KDG: 59:06

oh, it's gonna be annoying we had a car, though too. Oh wow, yeah, you can't do that cause yeah, let's go back to the.

Jesse: 59:12

My car's a Mercedes, a two door, yeah, and we found mushrooms growing in the side of the door.

KDG: 59:18

Yeah, that's wild Bad. That's bad, that's mold. Yeah, it wasn't black mold yeah.

Jesse: 59:28

Well, it wasn't black, thank God.

KDG: 59:29

Thank God yeah.

Jesse: 59:30

So I found green shit, that fucking thing, and I opened up my door. Yeah, because no one believed me. And I opened up my door, yeah, because no one believed me. Like they fucking like, I was sick for a long fucking time, dude.

KDG: 59:39

Right.

Jesse: 59:39

A long time and I was driving that car Right and I opened that panel. There was little like fucking stems growing out, bro. It is covered in fun like mushrooms and like, oh bro, it is covered in fung like mushrooms and like, oh bro, it is disgusting. I have to take the whole panel off. The other side's fine and all cars fine, except that the door panel, bro, and I am driving next to it with a vent right there yeah, there, yeah, just breathing it in. Blowing it right into my fucking face.

KDG: 1:00:21

I love the smell of mold when I'm driving on the streets. I'm a singer.

Jesse: 1:00:25

That's a fuck your voice though Every time I went to Justin's, who I record with I'd take the Mercedes, and I didn't know why I couldn't get my voice right when I got to his house. That was it, and my dad uses the other car on Wednesdays yeah for work. Yeah, yeah. And so I would have to take the Mercedes. So I was fucked up every time. Have to take the Mercedes, so I was fucked up every time, like it was worse and worse every time I went to his house. I didn't know why.

KDG: 1:01:04

He's adding up particles. Think about it floating in the air, bro Nose hairs are not going to catch that.

Jesse: 1:01:11

I ain't going back in that car until that shit's fucking done with yeah. So now I figured that out, so now I was crazy. And then I found out it also can make your fucking brain foggy, and cause short term memory loss and if you look at all the episodes, that's why you forgot my name.

KDG: 1:01:27

Today he called me Jeffrey. I was like my name's, Kevin. What are you calling Jeffrey for Crazy?

Jesse: 1:01:33

No, but if you look at other things, like because Carmine would be like yo, jess, you have like a sharp memory. You know Like what happened, like I'm like I don't know.

KDG: 1:01:42

And that's another thing why. That's why all this is happening. You know he sees a different side of you that he's not.

Jesse: 1:01:52

Because he doesn't understand how much of a toll something like we've been through. It's a lot of work, bro, prison, jail, all that stuff. It's going to fuck you up Some people. My dad I've never seen my dad cry before, only when his sister passed away.

Jesse: 1:02:13

Oh, wow the way, oh wow. And he was outside with me and cried and said to me jesse, I don't know how the fuck you did that, because I would never, ever be able to do what you did. Yeah, like just thinking about it, yeah, scares the shit out of me. It's true, man, like if I, bro, that was my biggest fear, my whole life, me and my brother would watch Locked Up, I'm like, oh my God, solitary confinement? No way, no, thank you, no, fucking thank you. You don't get a TV for like four months. You fucking get three books, like it's like thank god. Well, not thank god, but corona, like they, the rules were different for solitary.

Jesse: 1:03:08

Yeah, so you got things earlier and you're instead, you had like ten dollars in commissary instead of seven okay, that's good yeah, and you know I'm like, yeah, it was crazy dude like I went through a lot of shit, man, and, like I'm, I'm just starting to get back right and like I I asked, I asked everybody, even like you know, like I've gotten into fights with family members and everything, like it's hard to understand and I'm not just talking about the person sitting across from me, I'm just not talking about the people who have been in this room.

Jesse: 1:03:41

Um, I'm talking about, like it's general, like my people in my life right now. You guys got to understand like I just am starting to learn shit about myself. I know, at least I know.

Jesse: 1:03:55

I'm fucking up. I know what's going on, right, I know what's going on and I'm trying to fix it. I really am. I really am trying to fix it, okay. So done talking about that. I'm never bringing that shit up again. Okay, and as far as anything else goes, good luck, cheers, I can't wait. I'm the first viewer. I don't give a shit. No negative energy anymore.

Jesse: 1:04:28

It's all positive because they call me Mr Positive yes, and if anyone has any questions or doubts, you can email me at gettingoutthepodcast at gmailcom. And Kev also has proof, has seen proof so he can verify. And I can also get Mom back on for Part 2.

KDG: 1:04:49

I need that. I need to be on his TV.

Jesse: 1:04:53

Yeah, we're going to do that. Next time I can get Mom on for Part 2 to verify even some more. And I don't think that we're going to do that. Next time I could get mom on for part two to verify even some more. And I don't think that we don't want that to happen because mom goes crazy.

KDG: 1:05:01

Yeah, I love mom Mom will go fucking crazy.

Jesse: 1:05:05

Oh my God.

KDG: 1:05:06

Imagine your mom.

Jesse: 1:05:07

Because she really believed in this.

KDG: 1:05:09

She still does, but she fucking loves it Because I brought it back.

Jesse: 1:05:12

Yeah, yes, thank you, kev. I told it back yeah, yes, thank you, kev. I told carl, I told cars from the first time when we reconnected I said, bro, he's the missing link, he's the fucking missing link. Dude, we have four mics. It's great and he's an amazing editor.

Jesse: 1:05:27

You gotta see what he does, right? I was like he's gonna help us. I wasn't supposed to do video, right, and then I gotta start yelling out for doing not, for not doing video. I'm doing audio. What the? I don't know what's going on here. I don't know what's going on. I don't know. Literally, I don't know what's going on. But yeah, so like I it's, I was trying to put the pieces together and I think, like when you I brought you on, like they thought I was trying to kick them out, but no, I was just trying to help people.

KDG: 1:05:57

I'm trying to bring people together, yeah they want them to feel like they're in this also, I want to connect everybody.

Jesse: 1:06:02

Yeah, I want to connect that was the whole thing with the other thing with the person I was working with. I was trying to help his business as well as our business. Yeah, it's called synergy, it's called synergy, it's called synergy, synergy, what it's called, I think so I'm a synergy, I'm a synergy. I'm going to synergize the shit out of this. That's all I'm talking about. You know what I'm saying? Synergize, synergize it and bring it back together. You know what I mean? It means combine, use all your power as one.

KDG: 1:06:36

It's coming together, like the Power Rangers. It's going to come together. What do they do, woof?

Jesse: 1:06:41

They morph, they fucking synergize into one? Yes, they do. Is that the Power Rangers?

KDG: 1:06:48

They move in time.

Jesse: 1:06:49

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, do they have rings? Do they have rings?

KDG: 1:06:52

Yeah, who has rings?

Jesse: 1:06:53

Yeah, who has rings? Like hand rings, yeah, like finger rings. That's like yo like power. And then they all like throw their hands in the air and they become like a machine. Remember that shit. This is like Thundercats or some shit.

KDG: 1:07:07

Maybe that's what I was thinking about?

Jesse: 1:07:08

Was it Thundercats? I don't know. No way, that wasn't Thundercats.

KDG: 1:07:12

He said Vings.

Jesse: 1:07:13

Yeah, they were like oh fuck it. Unite though, dude, that's what I was trying to do. I would have made the rings, yeah, yeah, you know what I mean. And the friend was honestly, the first time In my entire life I used my own money and money that was given to me, like like on my birthday, like for things, on making stuff better, like on building up, like something for me and for us, you know, instead of like going out and using it to party. There you go.

KDG: 1:07:56

You know what I'm saying?

Jesse: 1:07:57

That's like, instead of going out to use it, using it on like something that's just going to be put down my vein, put up my nose, up my arm, something else. You get what I'm saying In my life, kev, I'm proud of you for that. I've had money in the bank where there was nothing, no car bought.

Jesse: 1:08:27

Right you for that. I've had money in the bank where there's. There was nothing you know, car bought like what the fuck? I didn't even buy a fucking car. It looked like like a little jalopy something, something. Yeah, I mean I had nothing to show for it like. So this the whole room was like a finished product. I couldn't leave my house. It was on ISP.

Jesse: 1:08:40

The room is like. It means a lot to me. I built it. I haven't built shit ever Kev Ever. Well, we did all this, Bro. I built fucking acoustic panels, that black thing you see behind oh, what are we going to name the giraffe, by the way, yeah, we're going to give him.

KDG: 1:08:56

Oh, what are we going to name the giraffe, by the way? Yeah, we're going to give him a name. What are?

Jesse: 1:08:58

we going to name him Kev. By the way, if people are listening, we got a fucking giraffe that we're going to have now in the room sometimes Because my fucking mystic tree is a big giraffe. My mystic tree died. I was very upset. I'm very upset about that.

KDG: 1:09:13

Have you died. Maybe that's what the smell was. That's what the smell of it was.

Jesse: 1:09:18

The rotting leaves. Yeah, it was there. Yeah, I watered it too much, I was taking care of it too much. Yeah, it wanted to be left alone and I was just spraying my baby.

KDG: 1:09:28

It's just a time they're like no.

Jesse: 1:09:33

So yeah, but I just Fucking it made, it was like a, it was like a blow, blow, yeah, and I just really wanted just to like. I really wanted them to walk in like guests, to walk in and be like whoa, yeah, this is cool, like this is in your mom's like apartment, you know. Like, because who our age, in our situation, has a house like like and like our really big house, like that they're very lucky if they do, if they do.

Jesse: 1:10:07

Yeah, and you know one of them. Like I pulled up to one of those very nice houses yeah I used to have one of them you had a, a big one, yeah, but it's very rare, it is rare Now in this day and age, so I wanted it to be very relatable and show people like yo we built this Right, this shit.

KDG: 1:10:27

Oh yeah, this I remember when this wasn't here.

Jesse: 1:10:29

You know, that's funny, that's what I'm saying, wow wow, this shit is built with fuck it by hand, with wood that is like not even sanded, like we. I don't know what the fuck I was doing. Yesterday I found out that all these screws were coming loose, and thank god that I found out. But and I fucking re-screwed everything with my arm the way it was, because I was ready to go to bed at 9 o'clock and the ghost was like he was fucking with you, right?

KDG: 1:11:03

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jesse: 1:11:04

It was like, oh no, you forgot. This whole thing is going to fall down.

KDG: 1:11:09

So the whole ghost story is that every time we're here and we get everything set, something goes on, something wrong goes on All the time, all the time. Tell them. And I remember him telling me and I was like, oh okay, yeah, I've been here a while and it's happening. It's happening a lot, it's happening and the door like the reflection, oh yeah.

Jesse: 1:11:32

We were shooting. Yeah, I'll put up a little bit of that episode see, that's the thing, all right. So we're going to talk about our new release schedule it's part of the ghost that happened, yeah, so last episode that we shot, yep, right, if you notice, we didn't put up a youtube video, but we have shorts back. We do which we will be releasing shortly. We're just, uh, you know, cleaning them up and making them look nice.

Jesse: 1:11:56

Uh, we don't want to release things that are not up to par you know, not very, you know because I will always give nicky props that kid's a beast. I love nicky.

KDG: 1:12:08

Nicky's awesome he's awesome, yeah profession.

Jesse: 1:12:11

Yep, awesome at what he does, definitely you know. So I gotta try to you know what I mean. My thumbnails are getting good. Yeah, my thumbnails are getting fucking good.

KDG: 1:12:19

My logos are getting very good, oh you didn't mean your thumbnail, yeah, no, I don't do that Black thumbnail. I didn't mean that. I didn't mean that it's okay, I'm sorry, I didn't mean the black. It? Why are you saying I'm black when I'm white?

Jesse: 1:12:33

I know, fuck Shit, damn it. Oh fuck, all right, but I was going to say the thumbnails. I'm getting good at Mother's Day thumbnail.

KDG: 1:12:42

Yes, sick Mother's Day. Mother's Day thumbnail was sick. Yeah, it was that took a fucking minute.

Jesse: 1:12:49

So that's what I want to talk about. It is very difficult. I'm doing um, I'm doing most of the work myself and we're trying to get kevin's down to help. 100 and he does anytime yeah, 100. It's not that he's not um, it's just that we money's tight told you, it's gonna take time yeah, god was with us today. Um, I didn't know how I was gonna get through the next couple months until I was going to get this whole thing settled, but I called up one of the services that is like the most expensive.

KDG: 1:13:27

Yeah.

Jesse: 1:13:28

And they heard me out and they gave me three months for free. They had called back up and we'll give you a refund on your previous purchases and use that towards your next three months. So it's basically I'm getting like six months free and then I'm getting a year for like half off. So and like he really, really, really hooked it up for me when I was like so close, because I'm getting emails every day like payment declined, like oh my god, where am I gonna get this money? Like what am I how?

Jesse: 1:14:03

and you don't want to think like that no, exactly, I know, I know, and I would be like and that's what I talked to carmine about- and I would talk to my best friends about. I'd be straight up with them Like, yeah, like I'm scared that I'm going to think to do something that I shouldn't do. Exactly yeah. Because of money.

KDG: 1:14:30

Yeah, it's depressing. It's depressing yeah.

Jesse: 1:14:34

So I don't know, but like we are getting there, we're almost at the end you got that right. With my whole disability thing, hopefully, and I'm going to the spinal doctor and they're going to find out, because it is definitely a nerve and circulation problem that is causing this, because my finger is starting to like turn blue. Yeah, I'm getting electrical shocks through my whole arm. It's bad, kev, really really bad. And uh, it's just getting worse as as days and weeks go on, I'm just getting used to it.

KDG: 1:15:09

What are they doing?

Jesse: 1:15:10

they're not doing nothing I have to go to my lawyers, doctors, because the doctors that the courts are sending me to Not doing nothing.

KDG: 1:15:19

They're not doing shit.

Jesse: 1:15:20

They literally they told me things and didn't even write it in their report. For instance, oh yeah, tear and bicep it's nowhere to be found, but it's on the x-ray. Oh, you know what I mean? Like stupid shit like that. Yeah, but it's on the x-ray. Oh, you know what I mean? Like stupid shit like that, yeah, it's on the first x-ray. No, it's like weird things, dude. It's like really weird, but like, oh bro, I hate dealing with it. I just had it cost me like $60 to fax over work for like assistance, like a shit like and shit like that, like for food stamps and stuff, because I can't work. Like it costs money to apply. Like you get the fuck out of here, dude, this shit's got to stop. It's really it's got to stop, it's a game.

Jesse: 1:16:09

And like really, it's literally, you make your own.

KDG: 1:16:13

Yep.

Jesse: 1:16:14

Or fucking join in someone else's and live in misery.

KDG: 1:16:18

If that was me there's so many places I would sue and win. Do you know how I got out of jail? My mom said $50,000 lawyer, $50,000 lawyer. I stood there over that, but she's not even worried about that.

Jesse: 1:16:33

Oh, I didn't understand that. Say that again.

KDG: 1:16:35

My mom got me a $50,000 lawyer For what To take care of me. That's why I didn't get bonded out. I stayed in jail, okay, to make sure I was safe and stuff Okay. So that's like the main part of this. What were you just talking about? Tell me what you were just talking about.

Jesse: 1:16:51

No boy. What happened with the lawyer? What did the lawyer? What did the lawyer do? He got me out of jail without going to jail.

KDG: 1:16:59

Oh, yeah, because you only Okay, I would have been in prison for 21 years, no, 25 years. Damn yeah, damn Cal. Second degree robbery Now people understand how serious, that is.

Jesse: 1:17:09

Yeah, I did. I had a robbery, but I didn't like break, like it was like breaking and entering.

KDG: 1:17:15

Really yeah, that's like a baby shit.

Jesse: 1:17:17

Yeah, yeah.

KDG: 1:17:20

I wish I had theft.

Jesse: 1:17:21

Yeah, I stole about like probably, I think, three or four thousand dollars worth of stuff from them. Yeah, and I signed a twenty thousand dollar restitution deal that's what they made me sign. Or to go prison. You said you sign this or you go to prison. That's what they made me sign. Or to go to prison. You said you sign this or you go to prison. I was like, but I only stole like $6,000 worth of stuff. And they said, and you can't go to court and fight it Because my lawyer, who was one of the best public defenders I ever had, bro, he pulls me aside, I don't trust any of them.

Jesse: 1:17:56

Me either, bro. I'm on any of them, I me either, bro, my own me either bro this lawyer, don johnson. I will never he was a black dude was the best lawyer, better than some lawyers I've had dude public defender. I was one of the first people to get uh r o r on the no bail remember. Remember when no bail came out, yeah, and like they just started like releasing people and giving people like numbers or letter.

Jesse: 1:18:21

Uh, yeah, giving people a number scale one to five, Yep. So, uh, I was one of the first people on Martin Luther King day. It was like January something, I don't know what day Martin Luther King day is, but uh, yeah, the king day is. But, uh, yeah, it started that year january 1st and I was one of the first people that they did that was part of the uh, the release, and I was the last one to go up in the whole group, okay, and he was my public defender. Oh, right, yeah, so.

Jesse: 1:18:55

So I didn't know if I was grandfathered in or not, because my crime happened before that law kicked in, right, right. So I'm thinking, if the law doesn't start until this date and I did it before that, there's no way that it applies to me. I'm definitely still going to have a bond, exactly. So I'm hearing all these names being called for because I always get in trouble on a Friday or Saturday. Always I have to wait the weekend out because you know there's no court on the weekends, always, all the time. So I'm waiting the weekends, thinking like damn, wait, am I the fuck, is it gonna happen? Am I gonna get? Am I part of this? No cop knows no, ceo knows nothing.

Jesse: 1:19:44

This is all new no one's been through this before right, so everyone gets called down. That's part of it. My name's not on the list. Oh wow, I'm.

KDG: 1:19:55

That's nice.

Jesse: 1:19:55

I'm like oh shit, because you usually get called down, they brief you, right, and then you go back up to your cell and they'll be like, all right, you're going to have court at like 3 pm, right, and that's when they'll tell you if you're either getting released or you're not. But you usually know they'll tell you. Then I'm like I'm fucked. I am fucked, damn boo. 3 o'clock comes around, p and Ellie oh, what Get the fuck out of here? Get out there. I'm in the group. I'm on the last one on the line. Oh, wow, right, okay, I think it was like 2.45. Or you know, 1.45., 1.45.

KDG: 1:20:37

This is important.

Jesse: 1:20:39

So 145. So I'm watching it and this is one of the first proceedings ever for this. It's changed a lot now Because I've been through it twice. I've been through it when it first started and then I've been through it in 2019. After it was like a year or two in Okay, so they had no idea what the fuck was going on. They call up everybody. I'm watching how it's going. So the way it works is that based on your criminal history, your background, how many times you've been to court? Do you go to court? Do you run? How many times have you missed to court? Do you go to court? Do you run? How many times have you missed court? You know what I'm saying? Are your crimes violent or are they just stupid? Are they drug charges?

KDG: 1:21:30

No, I've talked all the way around them. No, no.

Jesse: 1:21:35

How many do you have? They also look at mental health. Okay, all right, like, if you have like any type of disability, or if you have any type of a disability, too, now is considered addiction and stuff like that. Like, because it fucks with your head. There's like they, they look, think they look deeper than just that. That's crazy. Like, bro, they're letting out rapists. That's crazy. What, yeah, bro? Like, like, yeah, but if and I'm not defending the fact that they're letting out rapists at all I think that's crazy. But you are innocent until proven guilty. Right on the in in, yeah, okay but rapists I don't care.

KDG: 1:22:13

Yeah, no, no, but if? But what happens if he didn't? They shouldn't be free. They vape to him. How do you know if he did or not? I don't care, he's in jail for it, they said he did, bro, you don't need to.

Jesse: 1:22:25

People are in Kev, come on.

KDG: 1:22:26

There's a lot of people who assassinate there. I'm telling you what is, wait, what are you Batman now, if I imagine, what are you Batman now? Imagine you're a judge, okay, alright. And then there's a guy he's like, okay, bam, you hear the story of what happened, yeah. And then there's a lady too yeah, maybe it's not true or something. Okay, is it gonna to bother you? Yeah, but not if the lady's lying, and how are you going to find out she's lying?

Jesse: 1:23:06

They better do some fucking. They do the rape kit and all that shit All that, so they definitely know. The grape kit. They get better, great, great.

KDG: 1:23:15

Oh yeah. Oh okay, oh, you can't say, I'm sorry.

Jesse: 1:23:20

Yeah, no. No, it's all right. You didn't say it, I did, but you know like there's ways to prove. But you got to understand. There has been a lot of times that people have been accused. Yeah, I believe it, and there have a lot of times like both ways, yeah A yeah, I believe it, and there are a lot of times like both ways. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

KDG: 1:23:39

A lot of people in jail are innocent, bro yeah. Or innocent bro.

Jesse: 1:23:42

I know one person that they gave that charge that they give to pedophiles. What do they call it? There's like a law, caitlin's Law or whatever.

KDG: 1:23:54

Yeah, they made a law for them.

Jesse: 1:23:55

That's very nice, yeah, but I'm saying like you have to like register wherever you are. You're a registered sex defender. You have to actually like tell them where you live and all that shit, that's good too, okay yeah this kid had a fucking girlfriend. He was 19. The girl was 16. The mom approved of it. They knew each other, for they were dating for over four years the. They knew each other, for they were dating for over four years. The girl got into a fight with her mom, ran away from home.

KDG: 1:24:20

Yeah.

Jesse: 1:24:21

The mom said that she never agreed to the relationship and that it was like that he was taking advantage of her.

KDG: 1:24:29

Oh, that's wow. See, that's nice.

Jesse: 1:24:31

And now he has to be looked at wherever he goes. Yeah, he spent four years in prison just waste it and his girlfriend comes to visit him and he's not pissed the one who put him in there.

KDG: 1:24:48

His girlfriend didn't put, his girlfriend's mom did, I know, but the same his girlfriend ran away.

Jesse: 1:24:53

She didn't like the mom, she ran away, wow, okay.

KDG: 1:24:55

So the mom was mad that she ran away and she didn't like the mom, she ran away.

Jesse: 1:24:57

Oh wow, okay. So the mom was mad that she ran away and put it on the boyfriend. The boyfriend went to prison for it. That's messed up so now, when he gets out, which I think he probably got out soon.

KDG: 1:25:05

Yeah.

Jesse: 1:25:06

He's got to register as a sex offender wherever he goes.

KDG: 1:25:09

And you know what that's really dangerous for them.

Jesse: 1:25:24

So that's pretty. Yeah, I get what I mean, kev. Yeah, that's what I'm saying, that's what I'm trying to say. I see, and a lot of people are are innocent in there that are fucking just.

KDG: 1:25:28

And bro, what do you? How do you?

Jesse: 1:25:29

give back someone 20 years? You can't. How do you give back someone that did 20 years for a fucking murder? Yeah, you can't. You can't give that shit back.

KDG: 1:25:36

No, you can mess them up. You can mess that person up for the rest of their life. I wouldn't want to survive. Well, survive, Live. It's crazy. All the time your mom's not alive. Everybody's like you know.

Jesse: 1:25:52

Ridiculous.

KDG: 1:25:53

Where you been, my son would be like where you been, dad, you been in jail.

Jesse: 1:25:58

I was in college. What are you talking about? I was taking classes.

KDG: 1:26:01

Well, I'm just saying for other people.

Jesse: 1:26:04

Bro, I was taking classes on how to fucking light black skin. Light black skin how to light black like use light. What am I fucking saying?

KDG: 1:26:16

I don't know. Ladies and gentlemen, yeah, yo.

Jesse: 1:26:21

See, that's what I'm saying. You just stalled on me. I hope you didn't stall On the fucking thing. You're stalling.

KDG: 1:26:27

Am I.

Jesse: 1:26:28

Yeah so, but let's go See, that's what I'm talking about Our internet sucks, it's pretty bad. It is bad. But, we're just trying To learn new things and try new things, so go to our website.

KDG: 1:26:41

Yes.

Jesse: 1:26:42

And we have some blogs up there for each episode I will be putting up yeah, pretty cool, right? Yep, I will be putting up a blog for each episode. So you're going to be getting the audio every Wednesday, like usual, but the video is going to be the prior week's video. You know what I'm saying Because we're a week behind, exactly. So now you're going to get last week's video. This week You're going to get this week's audio and you'll also get. That will leave us some time to give us some highlights, to do some editing, for a lot of B-roll and highlights and funny shit that we have. I'm sorry, kevin, I'm not putting you on the screen just because your camera is going fucking crazy right now.

Jesse: 1:27:37

It's all right, I'm here, Get me out of this box, get me out of here. See, ladies and gentlemen, we are trying, we're working with what we have. You know we're like well, we do what we can do when we do it, and I just want the best for everybody in my life and I don't want negativity around me anymore yeah, and I love your family and that's what's that's what I'm saying and they like that, I'd like and I just wanted I.

Jesse: 1:28:07

they loved, they love you, they loved everyone that has been here and been part of this and they have only supported and tried to make this work. Yeah, and help us in any way possible? Yeah, so she came on the show. We're going to do a part two, part two. You know what I mean? We're going to do a part fucking two, part two. So we got the block, we got the shorts are back. Yeah, they're back.

KDG: 1:28:36

They are back. Yeah, the back um back.

Jesse: 1:28:38

Yeah, so I, we got the juicy details that all that you will ever hear from me again, that's right. That my brothers. You know, my brother and I will still be doing a show, but uh, it's going to be a little bit because Shout out to my man. Yeah, Kev knows.

KDG: 1:29:00

Yeah, shout out Kev knows, we love him.

Jesse: 1:29:02

Shout out.

KDG: 1:29:03

He's got some family stuff going on right now Doing the laundry and doing the dishes. Doing the laundry and doing the dishes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jesse: 1:29:11

But he's going to come back soon. We'll see Pat again very soon. We'll see a lot of people soon. Yes, I invited Carmine back there you go he said no, so I don't know. So I'm. But I bro, I'm down to just get this shit going. Yes, exactly, you know, I just want, I just want, maybe we can get more episodes out each week you know we can.

KDG: 1:29:33

We got a lot of people figure this out. There's a lot of different people that uh want to join in that'll. I know that, I know I know that.

Jesse: 1:29:39

So like exactly so also getting out the podcastcom send us at gmailcom. So getting out the podcast at gmailcom send us an email any questions, leave in the comments, exactly. But if you have any funny stories, some videos, any fucking stories, videos, anything, send. Put your camera on Talking to your camera, send them all your way. I will fucking do my magic, put it on the TV and we will. Hey, we might even, we might even make that our own little show.

Jesse: 1:30:19

That's it. You know what I mean. I'm telling you it'll be good and, hey, we're going to start reading comments on there, we're going to start taking a lot more polls and we are starting a Discord channel so that you guys can keep in contact with us.

KDG: 1:30:33

Definitely keep in contact.

Jesse: 1:30:34

Yes, and let us know what topics you want us to talk about.

KDG: 1:30:37

Yep.

Jesse: 1:30:40

If you heard anything that you want us to explain further or talk about more. Like you know, the little prison stories like Kevin burning down fucking cornfields.

KDG: 1:30:49

Oh, so much fun.

Jesse: 1:30:50

Yeah, you know.

KDG: 1:30:51

Come on, man, you gotta get out.

Jesse: 1:30:59

You're killing yourself yourself. I killed myself already.

KDG: 1:31:00

I'm probably in a ring but I had to.

Jesse: 1:31:02

It was just getting too much because.

KDG: 1:31:04

I love.

Jesse: 1:31:04

I have too much love in my heart, yeah, to like to, to give it away and then just see it get stomped on. You know.

KDG: 1:31:19

Yeah.

Jesse: 1:31:19

It sucks, man. It's just not a good feeling, yeah, so I had to. I just want to rectify and I got, and it's the first time in my life.

KDG: 1:31:29

Mm-hmm, how you feel.

Jesse: 1:31:31

That I can say I got all the proof in the world to back myself up.

KDG: 1:31:35

Mm-hmm.

Jesse: 1:31:37

There you go. I got to do it. I got whoop fucking algorithms that told you what time I tried to go to bed, how often I woke up, what I did. I got my GPS on my phone at locations that shows you where I was and when I was, at what time of day.

KDG: 1:31:57

Right, right, damn All set.

Jesse: 1:32:00

Shows you how many doctors I'm going to and how many lawyers I'm at and what I'm doing. All of that, bro. I have the pictures of the doors with the fungus all going inside of the fucking Mercedes. I have every. I have the receipts of every payment that I've paid since the beginning of starting this. Yeah, you see that up there behind you that no one else can see. That was the first thing.

KDG: 1:32:29

Yeah.

Jesse: 1:32:31

The first thing and that was my dream board and it still is. It still is my friend Doesn't mean shit.

KDG: 1:32:37

Gets me emotional.

Jesse: 1:32:38

Right, yeah, that's what I'm saying it really does. And whose name was first Call mine. I love everybody. Just want to let you guys know that. Love you guys, you son of a bitch.