Ep. 5 - Heavy Melodies, Heavier Messages: From Childhood Connections to Mental Health Advocacy

Our guest, Dr. Tyler Calabrese, shares how his profound connection with music has been a transformative force in his life - his altar of hope, solace, and energy. Whitney Houston's 'I Wanna Dance with Somebody' reminds him of his Mom, and the uplifting messages of positive hardcore in H2O’s ‘Found the Truth Within’ helps him during challenging life transitions. The Canadian punk band Propagandhi's lyrics motivated him to use his privilege for those less fortunate. ‘Somewhere Out There,’ from the movie, An American Tale, provides the space to discuss toxic masculinity and the importance of healthy emotional outlets. We close  by exploring the connection between art and mental health awareness in Tyler’s annual event, Speak Your Truth, through the songs of Tim Barry and Carly Winters. Pull up a folding chair, grab a drink, find a spot around the fire, and enjoy the conversation and community.

Check out Speak You Truth’s Website

Watch Speak Your Truth 2023 on YouTube

See the Speak Your Truth Video Submissions 

Follow your hosts David, Raza, and Carolina every week as they embark on an epic adventure to find the songs that are stuck to us like audible tattoos to tell the story of who we are and where we’ve been. It’s a life story told through 6 songs. Take a listen, and as always, if you have someone whose life you’d like to hear in 6 songs, let us know.

WHO WE ARE

DAVID: Creator & Host @ALifeinSixSongs

Drummer | Educator | Philosopher | Combat Veteran | PTSD Advocate 

CAROLINA: Co-Host @ALifeinSixSongs

Storyteller | Head of Learning & Development Services @ReadySet

RAZA: Co-Host @ALifeinSixSongs

Guitarist | Lawyer | Solo Project @Solamente.Band

RESOURCES AND LINKS

• Liked songs from this life story? Check out A Life in Six Songs playlist on Apple Music and Spotify
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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Yeah, I'm gonna check on David and Raza how you to do it, you okay man life is hard, it's hard, it's so hard, it's hard.

Speaker 2: 0:12

Out there man.

Speaker 4: 0:52

Hey everybody, welcome to A Life in Six Songs. I'm your host, David Reese, and I'm joined by my co-host, Carolina, who also happens to be my wife and my childhood friend, Raza.

Speaker 1: 1:03

Hey, hey.

Speaker 4: 1:04

Hello, for those of you that are new to the podcast, each week we embark on an epic adventure to find the songs that are stuck to us like audible tattoos, that tell the story of who we are and where we've been, to help us figure out where we want to go. It's a life story told through six songs, so let's go have a listen together. Our guest today is Dr Tyler Calabrese. Tyler is a licensed psychologist involved in a variety of practices, from VA evaluations to therapy to psilocybin clinical trials, with music being such an integral part of every facet of his life. Tyler co-founded and organizes an annual art and mental health event called Speak your Truth, which seeks to stop the stigma of mental illness by having a variety of different artists, including musicians, share their struggles with mental illness. Tyler, welcome to A Life in Six Songs.

Speaker 4: 1:58

Thank you for having me. This is a real treat. I've been excited for this since I first caught Windabit.

Speaker 4: 2:05

Great, yeah, we're happy to have you here. Carolina, take it away.

Speaker 1: 2:10

Sure, super happy to have you, tyler. Like we're all pumped as we read through your answers to the questionnaire and looking at the songs that you picked and the very personal memories tied to them. It was very clear from reading your answers that music plays a significant role in your life, and so we'd like to kick things off with asking you just what role music plays in your life.

Speaker 4: 2:35

Great question. Well, I think most people would say that music is a big part of their life or that music is a religion, and for me, I think that's definitely the case, in the sense that it's something that gives me hope and gives me solace when I need it, gives me energy. It's something that I wear in my sleeve, like people wear their crosses. I wear my Raw Brigade shirt and, you know, wear my Colombian hardcore band and you know, I tithe. You know, in terms of supporting the musicians through record stores, through direct pay for the artists, through shows, merchandise, and you know, something that you know is sort of a bridge to when I go other places and connecting with different cultures. So, yeah, it's like a religion. Yeah, don't tell my grandma I said that.

Speaker 1: 3:35

Don't tell my grandma. I said that that's hilarious.

Speaker 4: 3:38

I'll be sure to email it to her.

Speaker 1: 3:41

No, but it's it's, it's important and it's key, and sometimes we attach ourselves to those things that that drivers or hold special places in our lives at fairly young ages. So to kick us off, we'll start with our first song and prompted question what's a song that reminds you of your parent or guardian or foster parent?

Speaker 4: 4:05

All right, great question, one that I definitely was trying to answer. Yeah, rorschach style, projective test style, like kind of what first came to mind. Yeah, I had one for my dad as well Pink Floyd Breathe, but for my mom was was definitely a Whitney Houston. I want to dance with somebody, for whatever reason.

Speaker 4: 4:28

I just remember so well, like as a kid, just cruising around with her in the car and that when Houston early 80s was, you know, top of the charts, a constant presence on the pop radio and she loved Whitney and Whitney was, I don't know somebody that she kind of gravitated to, is like, you know, we got a strong woman and you know somebody who, you know my mom had definitely been through some challenges and her life as well, like, like Whitney, had you know, different ways of course, but yeah, that that song kind of stuck with me and we were just the reason why it really resonated.

Speaker 4: 5:11

We were at a family wedding in Kansas where my, where she grew up and she was around a lot of her family and you know she just was so happy listening to that song and you know was dancing with me and it was crazy. I just I felt so emotional that I like was crying on the dance floor listening to it because it just made me happy to see her happy and, like you know that it seemed to bring up, you know, some good times in her life, some simpler times and, yeah, good Whitney.

Speaker 3: 5:48

Yeah.

Speaker 4: 5:50

Let's, let's, take a listen, yeah.

Speaker 4: 6:39

Yeah, wow.

Speaker 1: 6:43

How, how does it feel now listening to it again?

Speaker 4: 6:46

Yeah, I mean, I'm just like instantly put, put back there. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, it was a beautiful, it was a beautiful moment. Yeah, I didn't know. I mean Whitney, you know, stayed beyond that. You know, the bodyguard soundtrack was like one of her favorites too and that was like oh yeah, was just like everywhere it went, that thing was blasting.

Speaker 4: 7:13

Yeah, when I was, you know, preparing the songs and stuff for the, for the podcast. You know, here in this one again, it just wanted just like rocks. It's, like you know, instantly put me in just a good mood in that way, but very much like you said to it, it's, it definitely just brings you back, like it, you're instantly transported to, you know, riding in your mom's car, oh yeah, you know, watching MTV or something for sure, Big time.

Speaker 4: 7:41

And I don't typically gravitate to that type of music. But I don't know it. Just it kind of hits for me and, whatever reason, I still haven't seen the movie. I mean, I heard it's great.

Speaker 3: 7:55

Whoa.

Speaker 1: 7:57

Well, there's your homework for the weekend.

Speaker 3: 7:59

There you go.

Speaker 1: 8:00

Bodyguard does not get the credit it deserves.

Speaker 4: 8:04

Just just saying. But I'm a movie, the album like the whole picture.

Speaker 4: 8:10

Yeah, the whole thing yeah.

Speaker 1: 8:12

Yeah, the whole. Thing.

Speaker 2: 8:14

That was actually. I wasn't a Whitney fan. I remember. I remember the movie that was actually my first exposure to Whitney Houston. I think it was probably like 10 or 11 at the time and and and and and Kevin Costner. I think that was his next movie after the Robin Hood movie that he did.

Speaker 4: 8:37

It was a complete Friends of these. Yeah, offer one.

Speaker 2: 8:41

And I remember watching like the previews and stuff and just like, wow, it's that it's a dude who's playing Robin Hood in a completely different role, and I remember they were they were trying to at the time. They were trying to make parallels between Whitney Houston's character and, I think, where I carry, who was like the up and coming, you know star at the time. Whitney was definitely much more established at that point and, yeah, it was a great movie. You should definitely check it out. Yeah, got to.

Speaker 4: 9:10

And I just I heard from someone recently that said you know, a lot of times when someone says they haven't seen a movie, that like is one. Everyone said it's like this thing. Oh, how can you not?

Speaker 6: 9:21

Why would you?

Speaker 4: 9:22

And and the. This person was saying like switch that. So, rather than make the person feel bad, be excited for them. Be like, oh, I'm so excited you get to see it for the first time again, you know, and have that first moment. So yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2: 9:39

No, I think, yeah, like Carolina said, you got, you got some homework to do, right, not to turn it, not to turn it around completely, but you know, fast forward to obviously more recently, you know, after, after Whitney passed away. So, kevin Costner, I think he delivered either the eulogy or he made some sort of a memorial, you know, with with her, with her, with her funeral party, and I remember, I think either someone who's a bit younger than me, I remember them just asking you know why, kevin Costner, of all people, right, they obviously hadn't watched the movie, they didn't realize that there was a connection. You know, that was the cost of his connection to Whitney. But, yeah, yeah, I think most people think of Kevin Costner as like the dude from Yellowstone.

Speaker 3: 10:29

No, he's like no, he's back.

Speaker 2: 10:32

He was actually the bodyguard, don't give water world Right.

Speaker 4: 10:36

He's been training for this.

Speaker 2: 10:37

It wasn't the whole life, it was the bodyguard yeah.

Speaker 1: 10:41

Yeah, no, it's cool though, and I think talking about how you got emotional years later, like at a wedding so you're much older now at this point you know kind of dancing with your mom at the time. It's always impressive to me how songs still like come back to I don't know, like punch you in the gut in that way and I joke.

Speaker 1: 11:03

I teach workshops and stuff when we talk about kind of relating back to being a kid and feeling included and stuff, and I'll joke and say like we're all just taller children, right, we're still carrying the things and those like emotions and memories and attachments to our parents and things, and so I have to imagine, even as an adult, like you're hearing it and you're in this really happy moment and it just like a wave or something kind of hit and I'm like definitely a sentimental crier, like you know, weddings, like I don't know.

Speaker 4: 11:34

I think it's all the like psychology work and all like the just the tough things I hear, like that when there's something positive and sweet, I like I don't know, that's how I. Oh that's interesting yeah.

Speaker 3: 11:46

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4: 11:48

I can see that.

Speaker 1: 11:49

Yeah, that's a conversation for another time, because that happens to me too.

Speaker 1: 11:55

I worked in emergency medicine for a bit, like I've seen some stuff, don't cry, but like somebody, like when the Olympics or gets a medal or gets like honored in some way, and I'm like like I'm a ball of, like a mess and it's like a happy thing, yeah, interesting, yeah. So I'll move us, I'll fast forward as a head a little bit, all right. So I'm just thinking about, you know, just transitions like this. The song you had earlier was a childhood memory, but it sort of seemed to still hit you in adulthood, even though you're you are a totally different place in your life. And so this next question kind of you know, addresses those transitions what's a song that you typically associate with a weighty transition in your life?

Speaker 4: 12:42

Yeah, and another one of those songs that I was like. But just so many answers I could have given for this. But I'm trying to go projective psychology test style and come with the first thing that came to mind. The band called each dual was like a positive hardcore band. They did a song called Truth Within and at the time I was finishing grad school, finished my doctoral program, and wasn't sure my prospects were going to be. My wife was pregnant.

Speaker 4: 13:19

I was very nervous about that and you know, on paper, you know I should be be confident, but definitely somebody that gets riddled with self doubt, with anxiety, and I think I was looking for, you know, something to give me some inspiration. So like going to my scriptures, like going to you know, my music catalog and I think this I want to say the CD like fell out of a CD case in my car and I was like, oh wait, I remember this song and at the time a lot of the stuff I was listening to was like more I don't know, like more party kind of rock and roll, garage rock stuff, like didn't have this kind of message. And I found this song and it was just it was so encouraging for me and like it sounds like a little bit cheesy and with, like the lyrics. I think that this type of music is about that, about, like, just trying to, you know, tap into some inner strength and be positive and be hopeful. And did the trick, you know, definitely give me a boost.

Speaker 4: 14:26

Let's take a listen. We'll talk about it some more. On the back side Raza Raza went somewhere. Raza was.

Speaker 1: 15:04

I was like yeah, yeah, like how does it feel? Listen, but I could not because Raza was like in some sort of zone oh my god, the drummer is ridiculous.

Speaker 2: 15:15

He's amazing. Yeah, no, tyler, please, you know, tell us so where does that song take you?

Speaker 4: 15:23

yeah, I mean, I remember specifically like when I, when I popped it in, it was like after a baby shower and you know just all the the anxieties and the worries about everything swirling around in my mind and I was by myself in the car and popped it in and you know, just felt a lot better, you know, felt a lot more more confident and, like you know, to kick aside all the the negative cognitive distortions that you're swirling around in my mind and, you know, tap into, you know, some of the strengths.

Speaker 2: 16:05

I love that term. Positive hardcore I mean, I've definitely. So I'm just to give you a little bit of background. I'm sort of like the resident metal guy on the yeah, I know, both are and and and, but yeah, but so I definitely have heard of sort of my share of, you know, hardcore music, punk music. This is definitely more on the more punky side, but but I hadn't heard the term hard positive hardcore before.

Speaker 2: 16:32

So maybe, maybe let's start there that's obviously it has a positive message. But yeah, tell us about that. What? How do you define positive hardcore and how should we think of positive hardcore?

Speaker 4: 16:48

well, I don't want to be the spokesperson and get a deluge about the floor is yours my friend how do you understand?

Speaker 4: 17:00

yeah, some people would count. Each duo is like as that type of band, some people not. But yeah, when you get in the weeds of the sort of sub genres of music, yeah, there's a blend of hardcore that's a little bit about more positivity, that's a little bit more focused on, you know, kind of a straight edge lifestyle, animal rights, a kind of positive, progressive social changes. That's everything in song in song content, typically around that versus like there's some hardcore that's a little bit more angry and aggressive and there's some stuff I listened to that just sounds like, you know, gangster rap.

Speaker 4: 17:47

Version of the of my mom the gangster rap version of she knows we were talking about right right right, so I guess that's maybe the simplest way to sum it up yeah.

Speaker 1: 18:03

I had never heard of it before, so I'll say don't come after Tyler in the comments, right, right, if anybody does, they're in the wrong, because this is a judgment free podcast.

Speaker 4: 18:14

That's the whole point. So, yeah, yeah, no, I think that is going to be very like informative for for some of the listeners. Right, because the whole point this is not a positive hardcore focused podcast or a metal podcast, right, it's. It's it's genre non specific, right, and so I think some people that might not be into, you know, punk and hardcore and things like that, might think that everyone's just angry, is all hell and just wants to, you know, destroy and break down. That's, of course, out there. But knowing that this is out there and and you know, music of this style can have these, these messages, I think, I think is really valuable for people, to people to know.

Speaker 4: 19:01

Yeah, yeah, and Toby, who's the lead singer of H2O. He has a great podcast called One Life, one Chance and, yeah, I think he has like a charitable outreach arm of that too, where you know he has people on the podcast that you know gone through some challenges, like a lot of folks that are in recovery from addiction or mental health issues to, you know, put something inspiring out there and, you know, really sourcing people from the music industry in particular. So he's still doing awesome.

Speaker 3: 19:31

Yeah, yeah, that's really cool yeah, yeah, I mean I go ahead.

Speaker 2: 19:37

I'm just gonna say I've noticed that more and more especially like with, with a heavier sort of music genres, genres that you think that are more aggressive sounding, I think, to the lay person, but but obviously to us, more sort of you know more schooled individuals who might think that no, there's actually like a really positive message. I mean, I can think of everyone from, like Gujira recently, cedar. Even Metallica has a you know not-for-profit or nonprofit arm of their you know behemoth organization. But but, but a lot of, I'm noticing that more and more, that that heavier bands, bands that are that people think that might be more aggressive, they, they are doing a lot of good work, actual good work, taking action, getting a good positive message out there and supporting you know, multiple variations of different types of causes. I mean everything from, like you know, mental health issues, suicide prevention, veterans issues, you know, homelessness and the Metallica's the foundation to support music, music education instruments, feeding the, feeding people that don't have access to food.

Speaker 2: 20:52

I think that was one of the. I thought it was amazing. I mean they pretty much every, every, every one of their tour stops. You know they have catering for their entire you know crew and there's always leftovers. What do you do with these leftovers? While you donate them to local organizations and there's a huge you know huge impact that they're having. But it's really really good to see again music that that folks might not associate with positivity, doing actual work toward positive change and social justice and things like that. So, yeah, big time love that.

Speaker 4: 21:28

Yeah, yeah, they're actually backing it up and they're not just sitting there, they're not just singing about it, they're actually living it and doing it right.

Speaker 4: 21:37

Yeah, but before we move on, I can see Carolina, you know, want to move us along, maybe keep us in check here.

Speaker 4: 21:47

But I do want to say one, one other thing just about this, this song and kind of more of you know the podcast itself and you know me, you know starting it and doing it, because you know that line in here that you mentioned, you know, only afraid of knowing all the things I could have done. You know, as, as someone you know with PTSD and and you know has has been on the journey of trying to heal from, you know that that that was really like moving to me. You know you sort of said the CD fell out and it's sort of like the CD chose you. I feel like like that kind of hit me and chose me too in a way, and so, yeah, I just want to thank you for being open with it and sharing it, because it just, you know it really hit me and, and you know, just made me connect so much more with it. So I just want to say thank you, hey my pleasure.

Speaker 4: 22:46

Yeah, that's. If that's the podcast that is working totally.

Speaker 1: 22:53

I feel like a lot of times with themes of transitions and weighty transitions. Sometimes there's, david, to your point, that kind of grief that can come from wondering what could have been, or you know alternative, you know futures that that aren't, and kind of grieving those moments. But songs that kind of uplift you and make you feel like it's going to be okay.

Speaker 1: 23:16

You know, despite whatever the transition or what's weighing heavily on you or decisions you need to make, like that's always pretty cool and and I like that the CD chose you and that's pretty awesome and I've learned something new today, because I did not know about positive hardcore and I'm not the resident metal hardcore listener of the three hosts, so I appreciate the new perspective and it teases up for our next question too, which is pretty cool what is a song that opened up an entirely new perspective for you, and how?

Speaker 4: 23:51

yeah, yeah, another one of these questions that just so many, so many answers.

Speaker 4: 23:57

I could have gone, but the one that really jumps out is the song called resisting tyrannical government by a band called propaganda to Canadian punk band.

Speaker 4: 24:12

At the time I was listening to this freshman year in college and I don't know how much you guys had this experience of, you know, kind of being exposed to new political views and, you know, just trying to make sense of that from, like you know, your experiences and your family origin, and this was one that really helped me solidify my worldview and my politics, because you know progressive politics or more so, and I guess, like, the altruistic element of you know, the focus on trying to help others, was something that always really spoke to me and my parents, who are, like, more on the Republican side, would have different perspective in the sense that we help others, like you know, we donate, we, like you know, are like very involved in helping out in the community with their work and outside of work and in this sense of, well, you know, why are you complaining about the government?

Speaker 4: 25:19

Why are you complaining about, you know, this capitalist system that's, you know, provided so well for, you know, our hardworking family and for other hardworking families. And you know this song. I don't know if you want to just queue up the lyrics, because I just you know, I think it made everything quick.

Speaker 4: 25:41

Yeah, yeah, let's take a listen and then we'll talk about it on the backside.

Speaker 7: 26:03

I recognize the irony. The system I oppose, of course, be the luxury A buddy in the hand that feeds. That's exactly why privilege sparks like me Should feel obliged to buy and take it, scream yeah till everyone has everything they need.

Speaker 3: 26:34

That's awesome.

Speaker 4: 26:36

Yeah, like some of the whole smash the state stuff, like I listen to it now and it's like, oh, like there's people doing that. I don't like that's not really what I'm about, like in theory when. So like that part. But you know the element of like, you know should feel like to be privileged, but still you know it be your, your mission, to like raise a fuss and make a stink to help other people who aren't in that position, that you can have it both ways. You know that you can, you know, be grateful, you know, for the people who helped you get where you are and supported you to give you a good existence, but also, you know it's your job to try to help other people get there too. So, yeah, I had to do a like an introspective paper in my master's program, a clinical psychology program, and it was, you know right, about lyrics that impacted you and I just went on like a two-page tear about that song and the professor was, like what is this song? Like, how did you hear this?

Speaker 4: 27:47

So, yeah, it's always one of these things I like love when an artist expresses something like perfectly in like 10 seconds with like the perfect choice of words, I love it. But it's also frustrating for me at times, because my grad work was in philosophy and social political philosophy and ethics and things like that, and so they just summed up that worldview in like 10 seconds and I've written, like you know, 80 page papers and stuff to try and do it. You know, people are writing books about all of this stuff and it's like there it is just boom, perfect. Because it's that thing of like you said. It's not just about like the sort of like, let's just tear down the state, right, and just without much else to it. It's really getting at that nuance of like, no like, because we've achieved something, we are in a position of success or whatever you want to call it. That's exactly why, right, we should be, should be doing this. So, yeah, I just yeah, love the line.

Speaker 4: 28:52

Yeah, good, I'm glad I resonated with you as well.

Speaker 2: 28:55

I love that you talked about I heard something about. I fully understand the irony of me talking about this stuff as someone who's probably benefited from it. But you know, don't take this as me whining about it. I'm trying to do something about it. That was cool too. It's very self aware.

Speaker 4: 29:17

Yeah, obviously like become more, you know, moderate in my political views, but you know, I think that's like where your early 20s, late teens are all about. Is, you know, kind of giving that fire in your belly to, you know, try to influence you and other parts of your life, like you know more, I guess, reasonable type of way than mechanic viruses that destroy capital.

Speaker 3: 29:47

I think that's part of the journey, isn't it?

Speaker 2: 29:49

It's like when you're a teen. It's like you do have a very sort of limited view of what's going on. You might see, you know stuff on the news, you might have parents that have a different political view because they've experienced, you know, the whole journey, but they might not have explained it in a certain way, or. But I think part of the journey is for teens to have that sort of fire in their belly, hopefully go to school or learn about things from a broader perspective and then maybe, over the course of a few decades, start to maybe temper those things and kind of meet folks in the middle somewhere and hopefully not become completely passive and, you know, jaded and whatnot. But yeah it's. I mean, I remember my views have definitely changed over the years and now you know, with kids and everything it's like you know why that's what I was going to say when you have kids that provides a whole new perspective.

Speaker 2: 30:51

Exactly yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

Speaker 1: 30:57

I think it's cool that this memory gave you different perspective. It was kind of tied to those like formative college years Because it resonated with me. I think I shared on my podcast on my episode I'm an immigrant. I didn't become a citizen until I was like 19. And I was so excited to vote, like I was so excited once I became a citizen that like that was the thing I could do. But I had no real education in my house about American politics. You know, it took a while for my family to become citizens and they didn't really vote. You know things like that. So I learned from my political science class and, like my freshman year and I had, like I remember there was a page that had like a list of like Republicans feel this and like Democrats feel this and I was like huh, you know, I guess I got to choose one of these.

Speaker 1: 31:45

and the Republican side was kind of like you know, like you know, pick yourself up by our bootstraps and hard work, and like accountability and stuff, and I was like what feels responsible, like I'm a Republican right.

Speaker 1: 32:00

And I voted. I think I graduated from college, voted Bush the first time. And then I think life said, hold my beer, let me teach you some things. And then I was completely switched parties. But like, yeah, your, your view changes so much from just such a young like you know. You're so young in college, really done a ton yet, seen a ton yet. So I wish maybe I would have been exposed to more music and less polycyte.

Speaker 4: 32:31

I don't know, like that, maybe talk to me more Digestical right, literally it was like.

Speaker 1: 32:37

it was like a table with like pros, cons and options, and I was like that feels right.

Speaker 4: 32:41

Yeah, like choosing your, choosing your elective in school.

Speaker 2: 32:47

So, more education made you vote more conservative. That's interesting, yeah, or conservative quote unquote yeah, it was business school education. Oh, of course for what it's worth.

Speaker 1: 33:00

Capitalism. Yeah Right, I don't want to say my finances, finance professor, ran like a hedge fund or something like this was the table was skewed like clearly you know kind of thing, and then you like go out into the real world and see how things really shake out, right, yeah yeah, health insurance costs money, oh crap. What the hell happened to my paycheck?

Speaker 2: 33:24

Yeah.

Speaker 4: 33:26

Yeah, sure.

Speaker 3: 33:27

Yeah.

Speaker 4: 33:28

Well, and I give a propaganda credit because I mean in the 90s which the punk was, you know it wasn't a lot of, it wasn't all that political. Beyond the bigger indie labels and their album like just had a lot of like poignant stuff that you know I think was ahead of its time in terms of criticisms of globalization and animal rights and, you know, kind of awareness around like like homosexuality and abuse, like just stuff that now I mean people are just sort of except and are talking about that. The time was just so you know. So out there Right Like so fringe.

Speaker 1: 34:14

So Right, and a common refrain back then was like no, no talk about politics at the dinner table, right. It was like like we just don't, you know, discuss that stuff.

Speaker 8: 34:26

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 34:27

How, how times have have changed. Unless you know, in your house you're still not talking about it. But. But I think it's cool and I think the more you're exposed to things you realize it is sort of the artists out in the world kind of, you know, pushing that envelope and challenging society to do better.

Speaker 4: 34:47

You know, yeah, yeah, and such an important role for society, right, the artists, right, people that I was going to say are free from some of these things, but you know we're all underneath it, but their, their, their chosen path gives them the freedom to, to express these thoughts and connect with us.

Speaker 1: 35:08

So, yeah, To quote it again to wine, kick and scream till everyone has what they need, which is super cool. That was the other reason I laughed and I said that was awesome. When I teach workshops about diversity, equity and inclusion, we talk about privilege a lot, because it's it's a must and necessity and I was like chuckling at like maybe I should just play the song. I feel like this is what you need to do your privilege. I was like this is so cool.

Speaker 4: 35:34

Oh, that would be epic Once. If you end up getting another job, your last workshop like when you're up in New York talking to the hedge funds and stuff and talking about diversity just pop this song on and just see what happens.

Speaker 1: 35:46

Yeah, I'll just run the lyrics up the thing and then the Delos court me out with security and that'll be it Right.

Speaker 4: 35:52

That'll be it.

Speaker 1: 35:54

All right, Moving us ahead from like idealistic, inspiring, really cool social progress and and those things there's. There's sometimes another side to music. Sometimes there are challenging or difficult memory songs we struggle to listen to or get through, and so I'll pivot us a little bit and ask you about a song that you struggle to listen to or need to even sometimes turn off because it's just a lot.

Speaker 4: 36:23

Yeah, yeah, as I've said with the prior three songs, like you know, just so many ones that that come up. The song somewhere out there from an American tale, I don't know who the artist was and they're like it was like people of Bryson or somebody did the Luther Van Joss maybe did like the studio version of it.

Speaker 4: 36:50

But and Linda, Ronstadt did the studio one. I want to say, yeah, certainly correct.

Speaker 1: 36:57

We looked it up, that was not sitting in there. No, no, no no, that was from getting preparing for the show.

Speaker 4: 37:04

I did not just know that off the top of my head. By any means, yeah, keep them on. I was scared.

Speaker 1: 37:09

Totally just throw them under.

Speaker 4: 37:11

Yeah, I guess at around that time was maybe not too long before there my family had moved from living with my mom's parents and living around them in Kansas. I was very close, very attached to them growing up and we moved to Pittsburgh and I just I missed them terribly and went and saw American Tale with my mom and the theater in Squill Hill, and I mean the movie, I mean it's just about him being separated from his family and somewhere out there, like I was just you know five year old boy crying in Pittsburgh, like that's not a good look in the movie theaters but yeah, like one of those that still gets me.

Speaker 4: 38:10

Let's take a listen. Everybody get your tissues ready. You can take your earphones out if you want.

Speaker 3: 38:24

There's someone up over there, honduras, here we go, we're going down. Now Somewhere out there Someone singing a prayer that will find one another In a big somewhere out there, how you doing.

Speaker 4: 39:17

Got caught me off guard. I guess I don't know how long it's been since I've listened to that.

Speaker 1: 39:25

Guess that's why yeah, I'll give you a minute for folks who are not familiar with with the movie. It was Animated. I don't even know if it's Disney, but an animated feature came out in the 80s, mid 80s, and it's about this little mouse and his family, and they are emigrating from Russia to the United States and Somewhere along the way they get separated, and so this little Kid, the little baby mouse, needs to, you know, find a way to reunite with his family. And it's like heart-wrenching right, it's an immigrant story, it's a tale, and we wanted to make sure to not give the radio Studio version but the movie version because it's a child singing, like I was telling David Think frozen and other movies.

Speaker 1: 40:13

It's adult cast members singing as their child Characters are. But this you can tell by the way this little kids voice cracks. It's child singing, yeah, so like yeah, rough.

Speaker 4: 40:29

Yeah, yeah and um, I, I, yeah, I love my grandparents a lot and you know I, they still live in Kansas and you know I see him, you know, a couple times a year and like it's still, when I, when I leave him, I, I, I get emotional and I, you know, I tell my kids like hey, like it's alright, you know, and when they you know my kids, sometimes, when they leave my parents after they've been what you know, they get sad and emotional and like, yeah, I Know how you feel. You know, like, just, you know that, like, growing up, you know in the 80s, in Pittsburgh, you know, show an emotion. You know sadness, we're not crying after. You know, losing football game, that's, that's okay.

Speaker 4: 41:21

You know it's not a Not a okay thing, do you know? Be a few word. But you, you know men still feel emotion. You know, usually it gets transferred into anger and this way less healthy. So I feel like nowadays the tide is turning and you know men can talk about Emotion and be emotional in a safe space, like you know, in a more acceptable Way, because I think people just saw that it was, it was unhealthy, you know, just sort of stuffed down, you know all the Negative emotion and only show anger.

Speaker 4: 42:10

Yeah yeah, absolutely yeah. This was another one. I hadn't heard this song since, probably like when I was single, single digits in age, and so, you know, just again, in this way of you know kind of the universe given you what you need or whatever, something like that when I heard this, yeah, just I, just like you, immediately started Balling. I was, I was able to keep it together now because I've listened to it a number of times. So over the last couple days preparing for the podcast, but no, the first few times it was just like people talk about Bambi as the movie that gets up like no, to me it's American tale. I remember watching it and just being like wrecked by it.

Speaker 4: 42:53

You're just like you know so much and and I share that again to say, like you know, I've been on this you know healing journey the past few years of of trying to, you know heal from, you know PTSD and like you were saying about men and whatnot, for for 15 years I, you know, realized I wasn't really feeling emotion.

Speaker 4: 43:17

I think I had cried maybe two or three times in the time in like 15 years and at weird times you like, when my dad passed away, didn't cry, you know, just like it just wasn't there. And now I've been getting better. I'm like all the time and stuff and and it's it's tough because it's like it's that thing, like, like you said you, you, you want to hold it in, because you're like no, I got to keep it together, got to hold it on, gotta, you know, suck it up, don't be a pussy. And you know, you know, you know, gotta, gotta, do it. And so you got that thing where it's like, oh, I don't want to do this, but then it like it also feels. So good to like, feel, and you're like this is reminded of that Seinfeld episode where it's like what's this salty discharge, yeah, yeah. So again, again, that is just to say thank you for another good song that that I connected with.

Speaker 4: 44:11

So, yeah, well, thanks for you know giving me some solidarity there.

Speaker 4: 44:17

Totally, I was right there with you.

Speaker 1: 44:22

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 44:24

What? Why do you guys think that is the Men crying, men showing emotion, things like that? I mean, I'm a man I'm just asking because I cry all the time on the dime, but but I'm really curious as far as you guys think that it's like, is it? Is it? Is it a cultural Thing? Are we are weeks? Are we, are we noticing sort of like a cultural shift and maybe recognition about, you know, male emotions and how, obviously we know that, not not showing emotion, if you're holding stuff in at some point it's gonna blow up in some way it has to come out. But I think I'm really curious and maybe, tyler, you might be a good Person to explain that from a professional standpoint but is there just, is it just like, the recognition of that? Is that just we're? We're talking more and more about it? Is it just like, is it just because it's high time? Do we have?

Speaker 2: 45:29

Obviously, you know we've like, as in America, men have been through a lot, you know, especially vets, veterans. You know, wars definitely change things to have a generational impact. We know that. But yeah, I'm curious what? What are your thoughts on that? Why, why is it that we have a better understanding and recognition of it now and you know how do we navigate that moving forward.

Speaker 4: 45:53

Yeah, Great question. I mean I think it's probably a Confluence of different factors. I mean, I think, for one, mental health awareness has just Gotten so much more prolific. You know it's, it's everywhere now and you know we're talking about podcasts. Like how many in the podcast I listen to or sponsored by better help, and it's, you know, men say no, just very blibbly, I do therapy and help me, blah, blah, blah, figure some stuff out.

Speaker 4: 46:26

I mean, I think that has a lot to do with it and I mean I think people realizing you know there's this, you know conversation around toxic masculinity and I mean I think that's a loaded term, but I think there's, you know there's a lot of, there's elements of truth behind that of, like, you know, men just kind of stuffing down there.

Speaker 4: 46:46

They're emotions and not having healthy ways to deal with emotions and that leading to anger and acting out substance use and All kind of terrible stuff. That like the suicide rate, for for men, you know, especially middle-aged men, it's like the highest of Like any, any groups, right, I don't know the numbers I should, but yes, again, probably probably a number of different things. I think there's some communities that still, you know, have that stigma more than others. There was a rapper that put, that did speaker truth this this year, named Stan Kells, and he did a song called war cry about like more so in the black community, about like this, this very issue of, like you know, stuffing down Emotions and then you know kind of coming out and unhealthy Ways like.

Speaker 4: 47:41

So I got put a plug in for Stan Kells and you know check out his stuff on YouTube and Instagram because, I mean, this song was just, I think, captured that in such a good way. You know, I'm just like, for me, as a psychologist working with you know people from different backgrounds. Yeah, yeah, there's definitely, you know, some cultures that you know still battling that harder than others.

Speaker 1: 48:08

Yeah, what's what's been cool to see and promising and hopeful for me. As you know, now somebody older who's got kids and my friends have kids and Is is watching my, my Friends, become fathers and the kinds of fathers that they are like. I think this generation growing up now in spaces where they're encouraged to feel all the feelings and it's okay to miss and grieve and cry and have healthy outlets, makes me super hopeful, because that was not the case you know I'll just speak for my household, but it wasn't the case growing up and so to see like just the break in in generational Curses and challenges is super cool to see.

Speaker 4: 49:00

Yeah, yeah, just going. You know, I appreciate, tyler, you bringing up, you know toxic masculinity and these terms, because it's, it's. You know there's a misconception I think out there about people hear toxic masculinity and they take it as Describing men as toxic, right? Right like that's that's what men are toxic, and it's like no, there's all kinds of masculinities out there and the toxic one is one kind and it's a bad one because of everything you described. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, I just really, yeah, I appreciate that, and so, yeah, cool.

Speaker 3: 49:40

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 49:43

So that was the struggle, obviously, and hard to listen to, but there are songs that sometimes help pull us out of difficult times and situations. Right, they give us hope, they lift us up, so we'll transition to that. What's a song, tyler, that's helped you through a difficult time or situation?

Speaker 4: 50:03

Yeah, just skip the preamble. Ronnie's song by Tim Berry was definitely one of those that got me through a tough time. Tim Berry was his lead singer, a punk band called A Vale, and I just caught wind that he was doing this more like folk, americana, country-ish type of stuff Not really anything that I'd listened to. I usually avoided that stuff but I was like, okay, let me check out what he's got. And it was just the most raw, gut-ranging songs that were, I mean, just like a punch in the gut. And one of the songs was Ronnie's song was about losing a friend to suicide and it was about just things that he didn't like. That was going on as hometown and just trying to make sense of that.

Speaker 4: 51:08

At the time I was listening to that I was just finally getting my head above water after I finished up grad school and getting licensed and having kids. During that time I had a lot of losses with people at opioids, family members, and one of my best friends from growing up died. Like one of my last years of grad school and I don't think I had time to really process that because I was just having my head down. I was just grinding constantly and that was like this confluence of times again where I could kind of come up for air and wasn't extremely stressed and overwhelmed, and then, listening to this music, it just got me very emotional and kind of made me want to do something with that pain and kind of drove me to try to find some healthier ways, to want to get back or maybe do something positive and just out of all the hurt that I saw with people in my sphere who were affected by mental health and addiction.

Speaker 4: 52:28

And it wasn't too long after that that I joined NAMI National Alliance on Mental Illness and was on their board of directors and kind of doing stuff outside the office to try to make some bigger change around mental health awareness and then Speak of Truth kind of evolved from that. So, yeah, and the song was just again like the album is so, so powerful. And I wrote to Tim Berry and I was like oh my God, this was so good, thank you for writing this. And he wrote back a very gracious response and like I mean, what good fan service.

Speaker 4: 53:03

Yeah.

Speaker 3: 53:04

Oh, that's cool, yeah, so.

Speaker 4: 53:08

Well, let's take a listen, yeah.

Speaker 6: 53:14

Still, I walk this town hoping to get lost somehow, it seems. By now, though, I've smoothed the path. In every sidewalk it's all painted black and gold, black tar. Where one stood, homes Gold in the hand of these student based franchise, and I sat at the river with Ronnie, watching the cormorants and the offspring diving for their prey. He asked about old friends. I said I ain't seen none of them. He said how'd you get here, man, and why'd you stay? Come on, brother, let's make a list of all those gone that we still miss. Let's make a list of what they believed and we still do, like living first and working last and beating the day before it's past, like what's mine is yours, man, and what's yours is mine. I think I'll stay here, getting older and angrier and getting louder With each passing day, and think about old friends and all that I have learned from them. They may have moved on, man, but we'll all be gone someday.

Speaker 1: 55:22

How's it feel listening to it now?

Speaker 4: 55:25

Good, yeah, I mean, takes me right back. Yeah, and again, nothing else in my music catalog was anything near that at that point. Sure, punk, metal, hip hop, reggae, not a sad folk country song, yeah, I think. Just a powerful emotion and just with the lyrics, sort of summing up these experiences not 100%, but the essence of it, of missing friends, of feeling disappointed with what's going on in your hometown and wanting to stay and feeling guilty for leaving, but probably better that you aren't around. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 56:24

I'm going to check on David and Raza. How are you two doing? You okay.

Speaker 2: 56:28

Man life is hard Life is hard, it's hard. It's so hard. It's hard out there, man, yeah, especially what the music does.

Speaker 4: 56:40

It lets us know we're not alone in that right. I mean, that's about all we can do is like not be alone.

Speaker 2: 56:46

I think we've all done a lot of moving around, leaving people behind, leaving places behind, struggled. Hopefully, are at least on the path to something better, something that makes a difference with ourselves and the people around us. But yeah, shit's hard man. Yeah, yeah, Go ahead.

Speaker 4: 57:14

Raza.

Speaker 2: 57:16

I was just going to say that and then I think we just got done talking about the whole male angle of it. And yeah, I'd be lying if I said that as a father, as a man, you don't feel certain obligations that I'm not going to say that are above and beyond, but I certainly grew up in more of a traditional household and there's definitely roles and pressures and things like that that are specific to being a dad and having those responsibilities and those obligations not to take anything away from the better halves in our lives. But yeah, there's definitely at least 50% of the struggle. So I'd like to take a minute to acknowledge the 50%, that's all. But yeah, no, I like that song. It's good. Yeah, it was beautiful.

Speaker 4: 58:16

Yeah, yeah, I usually try and do about 30 seconds to a minute of a song and this one I was just like no, you know what, it's my damn podcast. I'm going to play more because it's that good. There was just points that I'm like I don't want to cut that line out. I don't want to cut that one out. So that's what we're going with, but, yeah, this is one I didn't know about before. So just in starting this podcast, I was like, yeah, I'm probably going to get exposed to some new music and stuff and it's been happening, and just in the most wonderful ways possible.

Speaker 4: 58:55

Because this song was just I feel like I said this after every one of your songs of like thank you for giving me this song, but this is another one. That's been that way Because just some of the lines in there, just you know, of like trying to like, try I forget the exact line, but he's like I'm trying to find a sidewalk. I haven't worn down in this town and I can't, because you know I've walked everywhere and just that I want to get away from all of these things, but don't, and just you know, like Raza said, you know life is hard and so, like just hearing it, it was, it was yeah yeah really good, really great song Thanks.

Speaker 1: 59:33

Yeah, I could feel it got you, because you normally, like you said, it is 30 seconds and, for those listening just the audio and not watching the YouTube version of the podcast, david's got his eyes closed and he's I'm like, oh, we're just going to keep going, like we're just in like a deep trance of this song, which is pretty cool and, tyler, I love that. Something really awesome and beautiful came out of your experience with this song will queue up your, your last, your sixth song, but it does tie to your organization and we 100% want to learn more, so I'll tie that up first and then, and then we'll talk about it on the other side. But what's what's been your most moving live music experience?

Speaker 4: 1:00:21

Yeah, probably, yeah, I guess what's what's fresh in my mind is it was speaking truth Because you know, we that was just in in July and the music was, was a big part of that and I usually have some sense of like what people are going to do, what people are going to perform, you know, as artists, that kind of familiar with their work. And one of the, the gals that invited her name was Carly Winter, and I saw her. She was doing a music event for this project called Hi, how Are you? It's kind of to honor the memory of Daniel Johnston, who was a famous musician with bipolar disorder. So she was performing some cover songs for him. But so I knew she was like kind of aligned mental health wise, but that was about it, and I knew that she'd be an advocate and like say some kind of words about mental health.

Speaker 4: 1:01:15

But she gets up there and this was kind of later in the evening and she said, well, I was going to do this upbeat song but I heard everybody else kind of, you know, being open and being vulnerable. It made me want to do this heartfelt song called called Chemicals. And you know I won't get into her story, but she was open about, like just some, you know, some really challenging parts in her life and didn't realize that she was in high school and you know, just had this, you know this pretty, pretty awful experience in school. So you know she was, you know, very emotional and vulnerable and the whole crowd just like pretty much burst, burst into tears and I think because it just resonated with everybody to a certain extent about you know that those tough times in high school and can relate in some way, shape or form. And her song just knocked everybody's socks off. It was so beautiful. I was one of the masses that was emotional from that one.

Speaker 4: 1:02:27

Yeah, and I don't know if you're able to pull up that song, because it's probably not really even released or recorded.

Speaker 4: 1:02:35

Yeah, because she's, you know, new and exploding. Yeah, it was tough to find some stuff, but there was some things, and I found a song that kind of has the same kind of feel to it. So what we're going to listen to is her song Drug Dealers Daughter, which very much goes along with that same feel and very much of Speaker Truth Cool. So let's take a listen.

Speaker 8: 1:02:57

And I know that. Don't ask me where my little girl go, because, mama, I've been right here and you still don't seem to know. I won't ask you how you afford to put a roof over my head, because it's almost 4 AM. You could be home, but I'm here alone. Instead, the priest can't bless your heart with you Deny the holy water. Will I always be? Will I always be the drug dealer's daughter? Oh, oh, oh, oh. Will I always be the drug dealer's daughter, oh, oh.

Speaker 4: 1:03:47

Thanks, I hadn't heard that song and I don't know if that's autobiographical I don't necessarily think so but I think she's a great storyteller. The chemical certainly was more autobiographical. Yeah, it was one of those that someone threw up. There was like an A&R person here. She would be like, just like, and was like well, where were you when you first saw Carly Winner? Her?

Speaker 4: 1:04:18

former mate. That's right. I was right there, yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:04:23

Yeah, so, so, yeah, so that was definitely a very moving one because it definitely caught me off guard. I was expecting a little like kind of cheery pop tune and yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:04:38

I feel like there's a thread with your songs that you picked, and it's, I feel like, less the melody or the instruments and the music and more about, like, the songwriting aspect.

Speaker 4: 1:04:55

Probably. Yeah, yeah, because I'm not a musician by any means. Like so, like when you guys are talking about like drum lead, it's like way over my head but you know, not necessarily a writer either, but I'm a psychologist and you know a man of words.

Speaker 4: 1:05:14

So I think, yeah, that the emotional content probably you know, really resonated. And, mind you, there's a lot of music I listen to where you cannot hear vocals at all. It's like you know Cookie Monster or Dog Markings, but you know, some vocals don't always make a difference, but yeah, yeah I would say the ones that like really get to me, probably, you know, the lyrically heavy ones, yeah, Well, these are all heavy too, just in a different way.

Speaker 2: 1:05:44

Right Ravi's subject matter. You're right, yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:05:49

Gotta go listen to some trouble corpse after this to relax.

Speaker 4: 1:05:51

Yeah, that was on the jams last night.

Speaker 1: 1:05:57

Oh my goodness, sorry, david Go.

Speaker 4: 1:06:02

Oh, no, no, no.

Speaker 2: 1:06:06

Just ask a question real quick. Yeah, so you mentioned hearing this live at your at the, at the festival. Do you want to do you want to maybe talk more about that? Maybe sort of premise behind it and you know, for the audience and for and for the co-hosts?

Speaker 4: 1:06:24

Yeah, yeah, sure, I'd love to.

Speaker 2: 1:06:28

So you know, as a good promoter I'm wearing my speaker shirt Love it, love it.

Speaker 4: 1:06:32

Yeah. So in 2017, my colleague, david, and I were we're on the board of directors with with NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and we were tasked with making a some sort of fundraiser. And then somebody said we want you to do a 5k. You know those are popular, those raise a lot of money and we were both not real hyped on that. We kind of felt like that was too devoid from the message and both kind of went off and brainstormed and both kind of had this idea about an art and mental health event and at the time people thought it was, you know, kind of a harebrained idea and just like how was that going to work? And somehow it did. You know, we just along the way were meeting people that were kind of tuned into this.

Speaker 4: 1:07:23

One of the co-hosts, one of the co-organizers, malcolm, just as a genius child he's a, an MC and a producer and like post a big, open mic, recurring event in Annapolis. You know he had been his family, had been friends, had been affected by mental illness, so he just, you know, was quick to jump on it as well. And you know the arts community in Annapolis is extremely supportive and close and goes bad for each other. And I was just lucky to be doing it in a town like that where you know just the cooperation in the buying from folks really helped it. You know grow bigger and bigger every year. So you know we had, I don't know maybe like 40 different speakers this year. So yeah, it was yeah, and you know people just are encouraged by or feel inspired by coming and like give us a lot of good feedback so it just makes us want to do it year after year, appreciate, it.

Speaker 4: 1:08:30

I have an opportunity to you know, plug a little bit yeah totally yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:08:36

Yeah, we'll link it down in the show notes and stuff too, so people can find the info about it, right?

Speaker 2: 1:08:43

Hairbrain idea one naysayers zero Right.

Speaker 1: 1:08:48

Take that 5k.

Speaker 4: 1:08:50

That's right, that's right.

Speaker 2: 1:08:52

That's awesome, no that's such a fantastic idea, you know, engaging people, having artists come in, and I mean, just like your t-shirt says, speak your truth. And yeah, no, fantastic idea. Yeah, I'd like to support hairbrained ideas more than you do. The audience. I think someone called the iPhone a hairbrained idea to do it someplace.

Speaker 4: 1:09:20

Early adopters yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:09:22

No one's going to do this internet thing.

Speaker 1: 1:09:24

Yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:09:25

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:09:28

Tyler, is it just music artists or spoken word or visual artists? Is it like an array of different artists at the event?

Speaker 4: 1:09:36

It's a big tent, you know. We would say speakers in quotations, so anywhere from you know, visual artists to poets, musicians, of course, comics we had a burlesque dancer for the first time this year and I was like how that was going to work.

Speaker 4: 1:09:54

And it was. It worked perfectly. I mean, she was in tears at the end of it, wow, and it was just a gas like it was something that she said was kind of done to sort of transcend some trauma that she'd been through. So it just it stuns me every year to see how people kind of use their art and creativity to, you know, I guess, raise awareness to either just get through it to connect with other people. So I love this passion project.

Speaker 4: 1:10:26

How do people find out about it, or how do you like, do people apply to be part of it and do you like review, or is it? Is it more like I don't know if it was said before like open mic where it's just anyone walks up or you know so?

Speaker 4: 1:10:38

I usually just pester anybody that I have an inkling, that's an artist that. I was on vacation with my family and there was a standup comic that people was talking about mental illness and I was just like yelp hounding him about doing it. His name is Graham Kay and he has some really good stuff about autism awareness, so I'm hoping to pull him in on it. So, yes, it's usually just me and my you know my colleagues as well just pestering people to be part of it.

Speaker 4: 1:11:05

As the post of a new podcast. I totally get what you're saying of trying to track people.

Speaker 4: 1:11:11

We have in person, but then we, you know, have folks that can't be there in person. Submit videos. We have like a curated video of clips. So yeah, if you know anybody, send them my way.

Speaker 2: 1:11:23

Yeah, we'll do.

Speaker 4: 1:11:24

So, anybody listening. Go do it. Go speak your truth, Cool.

Speaker 4: 1:11:29

Like it.

Speaker 1: 1:11:31

All right, Tyler, we have gone through your six songs. How does it, how does it feel to hear your life reflected in six songs?

Speaker 4: 1:11:43

Um, this was great. This was a lot of fun. Um, you know, I wanted to share this with so many people and I did, like you know, some of the questions. So I think it's just such great conversation starters and there were some kind of illuminating things that came out of these questions, these questions with other people. So, um, I really love what you guys are doing and, um, really honored to you know, for this to be my first podcast experience.

Speaker 4: 1:12:15

Awesome.

Speaker 4: 1:12:16

Nice.

Speaker 4: 1:12:17

You did a great job.

Speaker 4: 1:12:18

Thanks, thank you, yeah, Um, in your preparation and in your just openness and vulnerability, because it's, you know, when I, when I got the idea to do this, you know it was, it was this you know very much this sort of you know very much, this sort of next step of like so many of the songs we talked about, of like, you know, I don't want to, you know, think about all the things I could have done, and so it was like, no, let's, let's do this, let's, you know, I want to have these conversations. It's, you know, connect, reconnect with people and things like that. And so I just thoroughly enjoyed this. These these hour or two of just, you know, talking to you and being here is is is just the most present I I have felt in a while and stuff, and so it's just really great to just have these conversations and just connect with this music. And, yeah, thank you so much.

Speaker 4: 1:13:11

What we three did a great job of just making this whole thing feel, feel comfortable, and to kind of get me into places to be vulnerable, which is not always easy to do. Sure, yeah.

Speaker 8: 1:13:28

Right, we're not ready to go yet. Okay.

Speaker 4: 1:13:32

We have our. We have our lightning round.

Speaker 1: 1:13:35

And it's just first concert, last concert, best concert.

Speaker 4: 1:13:38

Okay, go. So first concert, I'll applaud the 1995. That was the first one that kind of like I'm focused, rated myself to get to and go and it was a tremendous concert. You know Paul was the, you know it was the, the main attraction. Yeah, yeah, just being 13 years old and being exposed to everything that Lollipalooza had to offer Nice.

Speaker 1: 1:14:04

They're going home, yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:14:07

I met Moby and he performed sweet home, alabama and I got a autograph from my cousin who, you know, love Moby. So you know she's older cousins. Cool, cousin Nice, he's the best concert. Yeah, probably that one too, I mean, I mean I think, just like I've been to other, there's so many good, good concerts, big and small, but that was, um, yeah, that that one, I think, just making the biggest mark, yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:14:37

It's hard.

Speaker 4: 1:14:39

It's hard to come after that, yeah For sure that's great, cause so many people's first time is not their best, so there you go, yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:14:47

I'm sure I got dragged. I got, I got dragged along to, you know, other music events that I didn't necessarily want to go to, but that was the first that I sort of lose my brain, child Right. Last concert was, uh, two Fridays ago at a little venue called the depot in Baltimore. Shout out to the depot, Um, but cool, uh, cool little kind of dive bar metal metal venue. Um, I just I happened to like head run my office in Baltimore and like caught wind that there was going to be a show there and, um, you know, saw like three really good kind of thrash metal bands, like in this tiny little place the size of this kitchen and had a blast.

Speaker 8: 1:15:28

It was 10 bucks and you know yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:15:33

And I mean, you know, got to vibe with the bands afterwards and stuff like that. So I love like a dirty, dingy little metal show.

Speaker 2: 1:15:42

I love the fact that they're coming back because you know, during pandemic everything was shut down and and and then now you know the things have obviously opened up, festivals are back. But I think the best thing about about everything coming back is these little, yeah, dive bar type tight, you know you can smell like the wood and the rust and the sweat and everything You're not getting, six feet away from everybody. Yeah places.

Speaker 3: 1:16:07

No yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:16:08

Those days are gone and that was the first yeah. And that was the first, like that venue was the first indoor show I'd been to post COVID, so that was, like you know, the kind of special place in my heart too. It was another one seeing you know good little local metal bands put on a fun show yeah.

Speaker 1: 1:16:31

Yeah, here's to the little dive bars. We need them yeah.

Speaker 6: 1:16:35

I think that's a good sense, absolutely.

Speaker 1: 1:16:37

All right, tyler. So as we prepare to sign off from from our time together today, in the last couple minutes we have left, we'd love for us to hear, and our audience to hear Tell us what you've got going on, how people can get in contact with you if they're interested in speak your truth or or just you know, connecting with you and getting to know you what you got going on.

Speaker 4: 1:16:58

Sure yeah. So again, main reason I'm here plug in, speak the truth. You know already. You know making mental preparations for for next July. If you found Instagram, it's speak your truth. Crew Crew C-R-E-W.

Speaker 4: 1:17:16

C-R-E-W.

Speaker 4: 1:17:18

I don't know how my Pittsburgh ease made that that sound. Yeah, C-R-E-W, but yeah, and the. I don't have great SEO with with the, the website, but I'm sure you can Google it. Speak your truth, Annapolis, there's a lot of content on YouTube as well. Yeah, Check it out. So let's know if you want to be a part of it.

Speaker 4: 1:17:46

For everybody listening. We'll have all that in the show notes, so check them out.

Speaker 4: 1:17:49

Thank you, Because again not good SEO with it.

Speaker 1: 1:17:54

Damn algorithms.

Speaker 4: 1:17:56

You got it.

Speaker 4: 1:17:57

So, All right, Well, Tyler, I think I've said it a lot throughout, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, but but really, wow, Like you know when, when, when I got the idea for this, I I thought it would be cool, but you never really know, and and this is just far exceeded any expectation you know I could, I could have for it. So it's, you know. Just thank you for for that.

Speaker 4: 1:18:23

My pleasure.

Speaker 4: 1:18:24

Yeah.

Speaker 4: 1:18:25

And clearly I definitely enjoyed listening to yours and I wanted to ask you to you know, david Raza so many more questions, so I can't wait to hear your your interviews as well.

Speaker 4: 1:18:36

Great, great, yeah, yeah, we'll do. All right, everybody, all you listeners out there, make sure you know, hey, if you like what you hear and you you want to hear more, like and subscribe so you never miss an episode and always you know, if there's someone you want to hear from, let us know and, just like Tyler's doing with Speak your Truth, we're going to. We'll try and track them down and get them on the show. All right, everybody. Thanks for listening, so until next level.