Embark on a journey of self-discovery and resolution as we, Stacy Frost and Dr. Linton Hutchinson, guide you through the layered world of conflict that touches every aspect of our lives. Whether you're wrestling with personal inner turmoil or you're caught in the throes of a disagreement with others, we've got you covered. Our conversation dives into the heart of conflict, examining the role therapists play in guiding clients through these challenging waters. We tackle it all: intrapersonal struggles, ethical dilemmas, and the delicate art of maintaining neutrality in the face of charged topics like politics, ensuring that our own values support but never overshadow our clients' growth.
Let's navigate the complexities of human interaction together. We share enlightening stories and professional insights that illuminate the path to understanding and resolving conflicts at every level—from the deeply personal to the widely societal. Empathy, compromise, and understanding family dynamics become the tools we wield to manage interpersonal and intra-group tensions. Our discussion, rich with personal anecdotes, provides a nuanced perspective on maintaining professional integrity according to the ethical standards of therapy. Join us and gain the knowledge to foster peace, whether within your own mind or across the divides that separate us.
If you need to study for your national licensing exam, try the free samplers at: LicensureExams
This podcast is not associated with the NBCC, AMFTRB, ASW, ANCC, NASP, NAADAC, CCMC, NCPG, CRCC, or any state or governmental agency responsible for licensure.
Embark on a journey of self-discovery and resolution as we, Stacy Frost and Dr. Linton Hutchinson, guide you through the layered world of conflict that touches every aspect of our lives. Whether you're wrestling with personal inner turmoil or you're caught in the throes of a disagreement with others, we've got you covered. Our conversation dives into the heart of conflict, examining the role therapists play in guiding clients through these challenging waters. We tackle it all: intrapersonal struggles, ethical dilemmas, and the delicate art of maintaining neutrality in the face of charged topics like politics, ensuring that our own values support but never overshadow our clients' growth.
Let's navigate the complexities of human interaction together. We share enlightening stories and professional insights that illuminate the path to understanding and resolving conflicts at every level—from the deeply personal to the widely societal. Empathy, compromise, and understanding family dynamics become the tools we wield to manage interpersonal and intra-group tensions. Our discussion, rich with personal anecdotes, provides a nuanced perspective on maintaining professional integrity according to the ethical standards of therapy. Join us and gain the knowledge to foster peace, whether within your own mind or across the divides that separate us.
If you need to study for your national licensing exam, try the free samplers at: LicensureExams
This podcast is not associated with the NBCC, AMFTRB, ASW, ANCC, NASP, NAADAC, CCMC, NCPG, CRCC, or any state or governmental agency responsible for licensure.
Stacy:
Welcome back to our Licensure Exams podcast. I'm Stacey Frost.
Linton:
And I'm Dr Linton Hutchinson, and today we'll explore four different levels of conflict that you need to know about as you study for your exam.
Stacy:
Right Now. As you all know, conflict is an inevitable part of the human experience. Your job as a therapist is not to prevent conflict, but to help clients manage conflict constructively and resolve it successfully.
Linton:
So what kind of conflict are we talking about in the context of therapy Stacey?
Stacy:
Okay, so conflict can be divided into four levels Intrapersonal, interpersonal, intragroup and intergroup. And we'll start with intrapersonal conflict, which is a conflict within the person. Intra means within. Sometimes the most difficult battle we fight are the aspects of ourselves that we deny or prefer not to confront directly. It's like having a full-blown WWE wrestling match inside your own mind. An intrapersonal conflict reminds me of something the German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said Du selbst wirst immer der schlimmste Feinstein im du beginnen kannst. Or, loosely translated you yourself will always be the worst enemy you can encounter.
Linton:
Das hast ein richtig Frau.
Stacy:
Very good, Linton.
Linton:
Thanks. When I say the word conflict, you probably conjure up in your mind the image of two people arguing, but you can be in conflict with just yourself as well. So it's like playing a game of mental tug of war, except both sides are you. Some examples of intrapersonal conflict that you might see when you're working with a client are cognitive dissonance. When the client holds contradictory beliefs or attitudes that clash, they cause mental stress. For example, let's say that you had a client who believes in the sanctity of marriage but having an affair at the same time. This creates a kind of intrapersonal conflict that's as uncomfortable as wearing flip-flops and shorts in a Michigan winter, especially any time in that arctic frozen tundra Stacey.
Stacy:
Well, given that situation, you might see it escalate into an interpersonal conflict if the spouse finds out. And as far as the weather in florida is concerned, linton, the air down there is so thick and heavy not most, but all the time and it feels like you're trying to breathe by sucking through a hot, wet sponge, with humidity wrapped around you like a soggy, suffocating blanket.
Stacy:
And let's not forget those howling winds of the frequent hurricanes that sound like a pack of banshees screaming, while the torrential rains hammer down like a horde of angry toddlers who are throwing a tantrum. Should I go on?
Linton:
Okay, okay, I get it, I get it Okay. Well, here's a few more examples of intrapersonal conflicts. Emotional ambivalence that's when the client feels two conflicting emotions about something simultaneously like loving their partner but also feeling hostility towards them. The therapist's role in this situation is to help the client reconcile those mixed emotions and competing priorities. When the client struggles to balance or choose between two options, so, Lyndon, this reminds me of something.
Stacy:
Did you ever watch the show MASH?
Linton:
Hey, is the Pope Catholic, Of course. I love that show.
Stacy:
Well, one of my favorite characters after Radar and Sherman Potter is the Pope Catholic. Of course I love that show. Well, one of my favorite characters after Radar and Sherman Potter is the psychiatrist Sidney Freeman, who gets called into the medical army camp to see an Asian American soldier who tried to end his life. So after working with him for a little bit, sidney figured out that the soldier's suicide attempt was in response to an intense internal battle, his desire to be a loyal American fighting their enemy, versus his discomfort with the idea of fighting people who shared his ethnic background. So therapy can help clients explore and reconcile these conflicting aspects of their cultural and personal selves.
Linton:
There's also moral dilemmas. That's when a client faces an ethical situation where there may not be an absolute right choice. For example, a client who finds out that their husband has been collecting unemployment benefits for years while working a job and being paid under the table, and they're torn between protecting her husband by staying silent and upholding her personal ethics by reporting the fraud.
Stacy:
And while you may have your own opinions about the situation, as a therapist your role is not to tell the client what the right choice is, but to help them explore their own values, priorities and the potential consequences of different courses of action.
Linton:
Exactly A good place to start when working with clients who has experienced intrapersonal conflict is encouraging self-reflection. Have the client journal or think deeply about what aspects of themselves they are struggling with and any misaligned values. Or use something like cognitive diffusion. That's an exercise where you help the client distance themselves from the negative thoughts and view them as separate from their core selves. You may encourage the client to label their thoughts, for example, I'm having this thought that whatever or to imagine their thoughts as passing clouds or leaves moving down a stream.
Stacy:
Those are good ones, and clients aren't the only ones who are dealing with intrapersonal conflict. As a therapist, you'll also be confronted with ethical dilemmas, and the exam is going to test your ability to make sound ethical decisions, so make sure that you brush up on your code of ethics.
Linton:
That's a good point, stacey. To sum it up, intrapersonal conflicts is some sort of inner discord, dilemma or dispute, and generally intrapersonal conflict arise when a person feels that they aren't living according to their own values or being their own aesthetic self.
Stacy:
And this leads to the next level of conflict inter-personal conflict, also called dyadic conflict, and this is where there are disagreements or clashes between two people. For example, your client could be having an interpersonal conflict with a spouse, parent, child, friend, cowork-worker, boss. The possibilities are endless.
Linton:
And as a therapist, first you must help the client manage their own reactions constructively. Then you address the root issues fueling the interpersonal problems that they're having with another party.
Stacy:
Right. So if the clients don't first develop self-regulation skills, trying to explore those deep-seated issues that are driving their relational difficulties is most likely going to backfire on you. Instead of progress, you're more likely to see some destructive interactions, because the client is still really too emotionally reactive.
Linton:
So clients may also need help identifying and articulating their own needs before effectively communicating them in a relationship.
Stacy:
Exactly. So what are some specific conflict resolution skills that you might teach clients to use when they're experiencing interpersonal conflict? Linton.
Linton:
All right, these are some of those that you will need to know, probably for the exam. Active listening Fully concentrate on what the other person is saying without interpreting, paraphrasing content and feelings back to the person you're in conflict with, which shows that you are listening and understanding. Then there's I statements. Use statements starting with I when sharing feelings, needs and concerns. Avoid blaming others, which often provokes defensiveness. So, instead of saying you make me feel so frustrated, an I statement would be something like I feel frustrated. When Managing emotions, learn to express anger, hurt or frustration in modulated, constructive ways. Take a time out to cool down before continuing in a charged discussion. Empathy Try to put yourself in the other person's shoes. Seeing a situation from their perspective builds connection and insight. Even when disagreeing with somebody, questions like can you help me understand why this matters to you can always help and compromising. Find a middle ground through a give and take, so each person's top priorities gets partially addressed.
Stacy:
I've got an example for that one.
Linton:
Okay, let's hear it Stacey.
Stacy:
Okay. So you've been working with a married couple whose latest conflict is over how to spend a surprise tax refund they received the wife. She wants to put the money toward a family vacation because connecting through new experiences is a big priority for her, but the husband feels strongly about using the money to invest in repairs for the house, since maintaining their property is his biggest concern. So, after actively listening and trying to understand one another's perspectives, they identify their key priorities and areas where they're willing to be a little bit flexible and they agree to a compromise in the following manner they're going to use a portion of the refund for essential house repairs, which addresses the husband's priority. The remainder is going to go into a vacation fund, which addresses the wife's priority. They're going to cap spending on house repairs at a reasonable amount and, similarly, they're going to start saving incrementally for a vacation within a budget, instead of this elaborate trip that the wife originally envisioned.
Linton:
And Stacey, when was the last time you had something like that with CJ?
Stacy:
I couldn't tell you.
Linton:
Okay, so far we've reviewed intrapersonal conflict, where one person's internal conflicts with themselves, and interpersonal conflict, which is a conflict between two people. Now let's also add a few more people to the mix in intra-group conflict. This refers to conflict that takes place within a group. It's going to be three or more people and, as a therapist, you may see intra-group conflict emerge in a family or a group situation. In family therapy, the most common type of intra-group conflict you're likely to encounter are blended family challenges, where a family is struggling to merge their families after remarriage, death of a spouse, etc. Conflicts involve parenting roles, finances and boundaries, and in-law conflicts. Tension may stem from differences in family background values between a person and their in-laws. Common trigger points include parenting boundaries, holidays and family tradition.
Stacy:
And there are also parent-child disagreements, which involve disagreements between parents and children over issues like responsibilities, privileges, boundaries, values, etc. And these often peak during adolescence. And then, of course, there's sibling rivalries, so competition, jealousy or resentment between siblings over things like parental attention, fairness in treatment, shared resources and having different interests and values. These can persist from childhood right on into adulthood.
Linton:
Yeah, so Stacey. How did you deal with your civil rivalries with?
Stacy:
your civil rivalries? Oh, that's a trick question, linton.
Linton:
I'm an only child so I've dealt with them quite well. I had more intrapersonal conflict. I get it In adulthood. One of the biggest triggers for sibling rivalry is the death of a parent. At first it's just bickering between siblings like Megan, paul and Donna, who found themselves at odds after inheriting the family home. Megan wanted to sell it and split the profits evenly with her brothers and sister, but Paul felt personally attached to the house as his childhood home and wanted to continue living there alongside raising his own kids and honoring the late parents' memory. Donna also felt a personal attachment to the home and wondered why Paul thought he would get to live there. Donna wanted it for her family.
Stacy:
Boy, that's a complicated scenario.
Linton:
I know they each accused the other of being selfish and disrespectful, unable to see past their own preferences. Their disagreement spread throughout the family and other relatives were also pulled into the conflict.
Stacy:
Ah, the makings of a family feud. Oh gosh yeah. Yeah, it can be a really sticky situation. Oh gosh, yeah, compromise. Be prepared for them to all say no compromise though. So then you go into identifying points of agreement to help build some goodwill between them, facilitating proposals and counter proposals and, above all, really ensuring that the discussion remains respectful.
Linton:
If it was me, I think I'd hire myself a good lawyer.
Stacy:
Linton.
Linton:
What I know for a fact that you were the favorite daughter in your household, stacey, how did you deal with that?
Stacy:
Well, like I said, I was an only child, but somehow, linton, this is starting to feel like I triggered some unresolved childhood issues with your siblings. How did you get along with your three sisters being the only male child in the family?
Linton:
Well, stacey, like I said before, I'd hire myself a good lawyer. Moving on, yes, please. The last level of conflict we'll discuss before we wrap it up is inter-group conflict. This is when two or more groups are involved in a conflict. You'll see this type of conflict more on a social level. As a therapist, you may be working with a client caught in some intergroup conflict. Like what?
Stacy:
All right. Well, the first one that springs to mind is conflicts between ethnic and racial groups. For instance, you might work with a Latino client who grew up in the United States and feels caught between two worlds. At home, the client's family speaks Spanish, maintains traditional cultural practices and emphasizes strong family ties, but at school and at work, the client speaks English, adopts more individualistic values and feels the need to distance themselves from their cultural heritage in order to be accepted and to succeed. Then there's gender wars that involve disagreements between men's rights and women's rights over issues like domestic violence policies, custody rights and reproductive rights All right, I'll give you an example here. And reproductive rights All right, I'll give you an example here.
Stacy:
Cora, a newly single mother, is seeking therapy to deal with depression and anger that stems from a court ruling against her sexual abuse allegations due to activism-fueled gender biases that were favoring father's custody rights. All right. Then we've got generational divides, which is where there are value clashes centered on social norms and attitudes between the different generations baby boomers, gen X, millennials and Gen Z. Here's an example that might resonate with some of our listeners is seeking therapy to cope with an escalating intergenerational conflict with her progressive daughter and son-in-law over some really starkly contrasting parenting styles and her potentially losing access to her grandchildren, who she really loves and cares for. And then we've got Republicans versus Democrats. That always seems to be a huge dividing point. So what do you do when a client asks you if you're a Democrat or a Republican?
Linton:
Linton, Well, let's see I easily pause. Then I look them straight in the eye and tell them I'm an independent. So why are you interested in my political affiliation?
Stacy:
Ah, so you turn it into a learning opportunity, I see.
Linton:
Exactly, you've got it. Now to sum up the important aspects of conflict resolution, there are four levels of conflict you'll see as a therapist Intrapersonal, interpersonal, intragroup and intergroup. Intrapersonal conflicts involve internal discord within oneself, like cognitive dissidence, competing priorities, emotional ambivalence and moral dilemmas. So if you see any of those words, you know that you're dealing with intrapersonal conflict. Interpersonal conflict involves disagreements or clashes between two people, such as you, using I statements, managing emotions, encouraging empathy and compromising. Intra-group conflicts happens when a group of three or more people like a family. Common issues involved blended families, in-laws, parents, children and multiple siblings. And there's inter-group conflict happens between groups in society based on demographic identities such as race, gender, age, etc.
Stacy:
All right. Well, that wraps up today's episode. As always, as you're studying, remember it's in there.
