Meditation: My Go-To Tool for Facing Fear

Let's explore the transformative power of meditation and how it can help us overcome fear and accept change. Our conversation today focuses on the importance of facing fears instead of allowing them to paralyze us.

My Island Girl Zen Meditation Bundle is coming out soon. Keep an eye (and ear) open for the details.

Join us in Saint Martin for this year's Island Awakening Luxury Retreat for 4 days of transformation, letting go of fear, and a whole lot of fun in paradise.

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Chapters

• 11:09 Welcome to Paradise Perspectives
• 21:13 The Magic of Travel and Personal Growth
• 50:27 Introduction to Meditation as a Tool
• 3:40:02 Understanding the Paralyzing Nature of Fear
• 6:30:03 The Guided Meditation Experience
• 17:25:25 Join Our Island Awakening Luxury Retreat

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:10

Welcome to Paradise Perspectives, the podcast for women over 40 who are ready to move past fear, embrace change and create a life they love. From a Caribbean perspective, we keep it real here, we keep it honest and unfiltered, and we talk about growth, healing and the magic of travel, because stepping outside of your comfort zone, whether it's in life or anywhere else, is where the real transformation happens. Now let's get into today's episode. Hey there, my friend, and welcome back to another episode of Paradise Perspectives. Now, if you're new here, hi, I'm Rizal, your island friend, but I'm also your guide to living a fearless, joyful life. And if you've been hanging out with me before or if you've been listening to this podcast for a while, well, you already know we like to keep things real, I like to keep it light and maybe also a little bit of fun, because what is life without a lot of fun actually right? So today I want to talk to you about one of my favorite tools for handling fear, and it is something that has personally helped me through some of the scariest, most uncertain times of my life, and that little thing is meditation. Now, I know before you roll your eyes, because I could see you roll your eyes. I can actually hear you roll your eyes right now and I know what you're thinking. Oh no, she's about to tell me to sit in silence for an hour and think of literally nothing, right? Well, I promise you that's not what we're doing today. Meditation actually can be super simple and, trust me, if this overthinking, overanalyzing, always on the go island girl can do it but, believe me, so can you To prove it, I'm actually going to guide you through a very quick little five-minute meditation that you can do right here and right now. But first, before we go there, I want to talk to you again about fear, because this is one of the main topics here, on my podcast, but also on any other platform that you can see me. It's always on the blog, it's always on my YouTube channel.

Speaker 1: 2:34

Fear is a big part of what I do and what and who I am, I might say. You know, fear is that thing that I feel is the one thing that keeps us women, that it's actually that keeps us back, that holds us back constantly, and I think that as women, we are so powerful, beautiful, nurturing and all of that good stuff, but fear always gets in the way of us showing our greatness. So let's talk a little bit about fear before we dive into today's meditation. It is that thing that stops us from taking risks. It stops us from making the big moves in lives that we need to make and it definitely stops us from living our best lives right.

Speaker 1: 3:26

Whether it's fear of failure, it can be fear of judgment, fear of you know what people might say, what people might think, and, of course, that it can also be that nagging little voice in the back of your head just constantly whispering to you what if you're not good enough? What if you're not worthy? In my case, I've heard it so many times I'm not worthy, you're not good enough, you can't do this, and so on and so on. But fear can be really paralyzing, and fear is usually the main reason why you feel stuck and why you can't move forward. The main reason why you feel stuck and why you can't move forward. I felt it many, many times and it continues to be something that I feel almost daily.

Speaker 1: 4:11

If I'm being honest, you know, when I first started putting myself out there online terrifying when I had to start over after my separation. Beyond terrifying when I launched my coaching program. Now talk about fear. You know that was. That was their front and center. It was my biggest companion throughout the whole process of starting to coach.

Speaker 1: 4:38

You know, moving away from promoting St Martin as an Island destination, moving away from being a travel content creator to stepping into what I always wanted to do, which is to help women, to help women prosper, to help women release their fears, you know, doubt became one of my best friends. It was always by my side. Fear and doubt, those two on either side, one on the left, one on the right and these two were constantly whispering things about myself that I started to believe. I'm not good enough to be a coach. I don't know what a coach does, so I probably don't know how to help women. I don't know what to tell them when they're having major issues. How can I help them if I can't help myself? I don't even speak English. Right, english is not my first language. What if I stumble on my words? I can't start a podcast. You know all of those little things. They were my constant companion.

Speaker 1: 5:34

But yet I moved forward, and I didn't do it because of fear disappearing. I didn't do this magic meditation and all of a sudden, fear was gone. Because that's the thing about fear. Fear is always there. It's always our companion. There's no such thing as fearless as much as I love using that word fearless, there is no such thing as fearless. There is no such thing as doing it without fear. There is no such thing as doing a meditation and, all of a sudden, magically, fear disappears from your life. Because what I learned is to sit with it without letting it control me. I decided to do it scared, but to do it anyway, because fear will always be present, especially when you're about to do it.

Speaker 1: 6:26

Scared, but to do it anyway, because fear will always be present, especially when you're about to do something new. Because that's why it's scary, because it's new. It is scary because you've never done it before, because there's no data, and fear then will creep in and then state this bold thing like hold on, what are we doing? We don't know the outcome to this. Let's not go ahead, let's not do it. Let's just sit in our comfort right here and not do anything. That's what fear actually does. It's there to protect you. It's one of your best friends, but it's also your most dramatic friend. It always is like a drama queen. Fear is a drama queen. Fear always wants to make things so much bigger than they really are. All right. So meditation does not erase fear. It helps you see it differently, instead of letting fear run the show.

Speaker 1: 7:21

Meditation gives you a moment to pause, to take a breath and realize that that scary thing isn't actually as powerful as it looks or as it seems. So let's try it right now, you and me. No fancy setup needed. We don't need a meditation chamber or a meditation room or a meditation cushion under our ass. We just need five minutes of our time. Okay, that's all we need. So, obviously, if you were driving while you're listening to this podcast episode, then please pause and do it.

Speaker 1: 7:57

Do this exercise with me once you have five minutes to spare, and I'm sure that throughout your entire busy day you can take just five minutes. Okay, I promise you, it's not woo, woo, it's not completely out of body experiences, none of that. It's just a simple five minutes with yourself. Okay, so I'm going to go now into my Zen girl voice, so bear with me. All right, my friend, get comfortable. You can sit down, you can lie down, you can even do the standing, if that is how you want to do it. Just find a position where you feel at ease and I'm going to invite you now to close your eyes, taking a deep breath through your nose, and we're going to exhale slowly through the mouth. Okay, now, let's do it now, taking a deep breath through the nose and exhale slowly through the mouth. We're going to do that one more time Deep breath in through the mouth. We're going to do that one more time, deep breath in through the nose and let it all go as you're doing that. Go back now to your regular breathing. Concentrate on your breathing for a little bit and feel your shoulders drop, feel your body relax. You are safe where you are. Let. You are safe, you're at peace. Remember that thoughts will come and go, but just observe them from a distance, and if you lose track of this meditation at any point, I just want you to bring back your attention to your breathing and then back into this meditation.

Speaker 1: 10:12

Okay, now I want you to visualize your fear. I want you to see it in front of you right now. Whatever has been on your mind lately, whatever scary thing it could be a big decision, a new opportunity, or maybe it's just that general ugh feeling of doubt. You know You're so unsure and not feeling confident about. Whatever that thing is, see it in front of you right now. I don't want you to see it as something huge and scary. It's not this humongous thing towering over you. It's not scary at all. It's just something that is separate from you.

Speaker 1: 10:57

I want you to visualize it as this floating ball of red light. It's just floating in front of you. When you're just sitting or standing in front of it, you're just looking at it, admiring it. It's not scary at all. Now I want you to hold your hand underneath it. Remember it's this floating ball of red light and imagine, as you hold your hand under it, that it's shrinking and shrinking and shrinking down until it becomes a tiny little cloud of light floating in front of you. It's so small, like a little pebble that fits in the palm of your hand. It's there, it's just floating on your hand, but it's not you, it's not inside of you, it's not part of you. It's just this little, tiny, little pebble of red light that's floating on your hand, in front of you.

Speaker 1: 12:13

Now I want you next to take in a deep breath, but also, when you exhale, I want you to actually imagine blowing that fear away. Okay, so bring your hand towards your mouth, hold it in front of your face and now, taking a deep breath in through your nose, and this time, when you exhale, blow that fear away. Let it drift off like a balloon in the sky until you can't see it anymore, until it completely disappears. You don't need to anymore. Until it completely disappears, you don't need to hold on to it anymore. It's gone, okay. It's just drifting somewhere in space.

Speaker 1: 12:57

Now, speaking of space, I want you to feel the space that that now has left behind, now that you got rid of the sphere. Feel the space around you, that lightness, that openness. You have so much space around you. Feel the space in front of you, around you, surrounding you. Now, go ahead and place your hand over your heart. Feel that steady rhythm of your heart. Feel that steady rhythm of your heart. That is you, that's your strength, your courage, that's your resilience, your confidence. That is there, that lives right there in your heart. Fear can come and go, but you, nah, you, my friend, you are always here, you're always capable. All right, so now I want to invite you to take in one last deep breath through the nose. This time we're going to hold it at the top for four seconds before we release and we're going to release that breath with a big sigh okay, here we go, taking one last deep breath through the nose, hold it at the top for four, three, two, one and let it go with a sigh.

Speaker 1: 14:30

I want you to bring back your attention to the room around you, the space around you. Bring it back to the noises that we might hear on the outside. Maybe it's a light breeze, maybe it's the fan, maybe it's the fridge, whatever you're hearing in the background fan, maybe it's the fridge, whatever you're hearing in the background. Listen to it now. Start wiggling your toes, wiggling your fingers, come back to you and, when you're ready, gently open your eyes. How do you feel? Lighter, lighter, perhaps, clearer, more like yourself, maybe.

Speaker 1: 15:11

I want to know how this has made you feel. I want to know what you now think about this meditation. How did it make you feel? Is it helpful in any kind? So please let me know.

Speaker 1: 15:22

So, as you can see, it wasn't so bad, was it? I mean, there's no sense of woo. It's not something that you don't do because it's just not comfortable, and all of that Meditation can be so, so simple. It doesn't have to be complicated. It's just a way for you to pause, breathe and remember who you are, beyond the fear that you see as a threat, beyond the doubts, beyond the feeling of not feeling worthy or not feeling enough. I just want you to take this moment every day, if you can, and just sit with yourself, get comfortable with who you are, beyond the fear, beyond the doubts. Okay Now, if you loved this little moment of calm that we just shared, then I have, of your fear, to step into your confidence, reclaim your power and create the life that you actually want, and you can do this at home, at your own time, at your own pace. All right, think of it as your personal little island retreat that you get to do every day or every whatever. You have time for it and there's no plane ticket required.

Speaker 1: 17:04

But since we're on the topic of island retreats, I might as well tell you that my co-host and I, jen Litz, from Untethered with Jen, and if you have not listened to her podcast, please do me a favor and go and do that after this one, because her podcast is just wonderful and it is so, so helpful to you as well. She has a different way of getting you unstuck and helping you. You know, live your best life and she's really amazing at it. So go and take a listen. But I want to remind you that jen and I are hosting our second annual island awakening luxury retreat right here on my home island of saint martin. I invite you to come to my home, where we are going to spend four beautiful full days together full four full days together, four full days of transformation of fun. Listen, we did this last year and it was just mind-blowingly beautiful. It was so good, it was so awesome, it was so great. It was all the good words that exist in the English language. We had such an incredible good time. So if you want to be a part of this and you want to join me here on Beautiful St Martin, then go ahead, run, don't walk. Run to the link that I have left for you in the show notes after you've listened to this episode and click on that. It will take you to the website that will have all of the information that you might need in order to make up your mind whether you want to join us in paradise or not.

Speaker 1: 18:41

It is happening again from June 4th until the 8th. It is four full days of transformation of fun, of everything. It is just such a very, very limited list because we do not have a lot of space here at all. It's just a few women that will be able to take part of this with us. I invite you to grab a spot right now, and it's not only because there's only limited space available, but it's also because I have or we rather, jen and I have so many great goodies lined up for you. If you grab your seat right now or your spot, you get, like not only a free upgrade to the VIP package with all sorts of great bonuses, but you really get a really nice little hefty discount as well, and that discount is almost as much as your train or train sorry, plane ticket to come on down to the Caribbean. Okay, so I really, really hope that you are going to be a part of this. You do not want to miss it.

Speaker 1: 19:58

All right, my friend, it is time for me to thank you again for sharing this time with me. I am so, so grateful for you being here, for you spending this last few minutes with me and for doing this meditation. Good on you, girl. You did it. You are so much stronger than your fear is. Remember that, please. You are so much braver than you know and you are so incredibly worthy of the life that you dream of, okay, so don't let anybody or anything tell you otherwise.

Speaker 1: 20:32

Now, before I let you go, just do me a small little, tiny little favor, if you don't mind, and that is to leave a review. Leave some stars there on Apple podcast. Let me know what you think of this podcast. Is it helping you in any way? Who do you want to see next or listen to next as a guest on this episode, but also, or on this podcast? Sorry, but also I want to know from you what topic is troubling you and maybe I can help you with it. So let me know what topic I should talk about in the next episode. Okay, until next time, remember to keep reading, keep believing, and I can't wait to talk to you again soon. All right, ciao for now, bye.