E8: Are You Obsessed?

I am finally back here and today I'll talk about Obsession. for better or for worse, obsession is a part of all of our lives. Is there such a thing as healthy obsession? Can obsession be a good thing? 

Transcript

 Welcome back to Kinking Out Loud with Gothicc Hel.  It's been a long time since the last time I uploaded anything, and I would like to apologize for my very long absence, but hello. I'm back again, and hopefully I'm going to be doing this a little bit more often.  Today, I want to talk about obsession.  It's something we all are at least a little bit familiar with.

At least I am.  I have both been on the receiving end of obsession and on the giving end.  Sometimes in life, you just find someone or something that you can't quite shake. Someone who make you so enveloped and wrapped up in them that You just can't think about anything else. And sometimes obsession can be a good thing. 

Depends very much on the obsession. The type of obsession and what or who you're obsessed with.  Many people can get very obsessed with things. Collectioning, making things, producing, whatever it is. Which I find to be like a good hobby as long as it's... Not bordering on extreme obsession.  But I'm not here to talk about being obsessed with things.

I am here to talk mostly about being obsessed with people.  Mainly people that you have an extreme emotional connection with. Not necessarily a girlfriend, or a partner, or a friend.  Anyone, really. Anyone that you cannot stop thinking about. I will be the first to admit that I am definitely a very obsessive person. 

And, for the most, I think that my obsession has been very wanted, cause,  well, I think I have actually asked people if it's okay that I have been obsessed with them, and  those people have normally been my partners and or boyfriends, whatever it is.  So, yeah, I will classify that as a healthy type of obsession when you're obsessed with your spouse or your partner. 

However,  once the obsession includes things like jealousy and resentment  and things that just negatively affect you and the relationship you have with the person that you are consensually obsessing over, that's when things get kind of dangerous. I have had A lot of stalkers and obsessed people in my life,  both current and past, and these people used to be obsessed with me in a very  well, I would say good way. 

The reason they were obsessed with me was the same reason. I'm obsessed with people  like taking extreme interest in them as people and being.  Very, very attentive, knowing everything, you know, all of that. I know it sounds unhealthy, trust me. But as long as the person who is receiving and or giving is okay with it, then I don't see a reason not to do it. 

But when it comes to the unhealthy side of obsession, you have situations that can easily go from fun, and probably enjoyable, to downright dangerous and detrimental.  My typical obsessed fan, I would say,  Isn't always  obsessed for the right reasons. For example, most of the people who have been or are obsessed with me for the wrong reason,  are obsessed with me because I rejected them. 

Unfortunately, this is not like some kind of bragging right for me at all. These are people that had very negative influence on me in my life, and  after cutting them off, they became absolutely, completely obsessed with me.  Even more so than they were when I actually had them in my life.  So then, what was previously a fun type of obsession, for me at least, and I think them as well,  became an unhealthy, hateful,  very destructive type of obsession that has been consuming them very much and has been affecting me very negatively.

There are Therefore, very definite pitfalls when you ha happen to find yourself in an obsessed relationship. Where you are obsessed with someone or they are obsessed with you. Yes, it can be very fun,  but I don't actually advocate for it or recommend it. Even if it is a fun type of obsession, it can turn very dangerous and very sour. 

Make very, very sure that your obsession is not unhealthy, and make sure that the person you are obsessed with is okay with it.  And if the person you are obsessed with, or the person who is obsessed with you, and their relationship or no longer wants to be in your life, it is very important that you realize it is over. 

Your obsession is no longer wanted. Their obsession is no longer wanted. And continuing allowing it would be very, very unhealthy and could end in tragedy.  If it is very hard to let go,  I recommend you try to get some professional help, try to find a hobby, try to focus on yourself,  and for God's sake, try to let go.

Try and find someone new.  And if your obsessiveness is ruining your life,  I'm sorry, but maybe it is best if you are alone. But I would like to end this on a positive note when it comes to obsession.  Personally. I find a lot of joy in obsession, both receiving and giving. I find obsession to be very flattering and I think it's very endearing  when said obsession is good. 

I actually really like it. I actually really like being obsessed as well. I know that sounds very weird and maybe kind of unhealthy as well, but I...  Kind of see it more as a form of affection, and I know that sounds unhealthy.  But believe me, I make very sure that my,  my obsession with people  is wanted, consensual, and healthy. 

As long as it's all of those things, I say just go for it. Just make sure that you're not making anyone uncomfortable, and make sure that no matter what, you come first. Always.  Thank you so much for listening. I am going to try to release more episodes as it comes along.  Have a very nice day.