A New Look at Relationship Rejection and Character Development

Ever found yourself entangled in the gnarly web of relationship rejection? Well, you're not alone. Walk with me, Dez, as we explore this unchartered terrain, and realize how similar relationships can be to a job interview. We'll grapple with the harsh reality of not always getting what we want, and how it's crucial to tackle these situations with grace and maturity. I'll also share my personal insights on this challenging subject and how it can be a bitter pill for the soul yet a sweet tonic for character growth.

But the journey doesn't stop there. We'll also get our hands dirty and dig deeper into understanding our desires and why we covet certain things. Ever wondered if having everything you desire can actually be a bane rather than a boon? We'll philosophize on this thought and explore how rejection can be a powerful catalyst for personal growth. By the end of our journey, we aim to provide a fresh perspective and hopefully infuse a new sense of understanding of rejection in relationships. So, buckle up and join the ride as we peel back the layers of desires, wants, and the complex world of rejection.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:06

You know that's a dope intro song. Anyway, welcome back to the Come On, you Know podcast. I'm your host, dez, and you know I have like 2 million subscribers and every single one of them sends me requests for what to do a show about. And today's show is about rejection and, more specifically, if you are holding on to someone that you want to have a relationship with and they don't want you. So how you know, in my infinite wisdom, I will give you my opinion about that what to do, what not to do and what I think about it. So anyway, I don't have 2 million subscribers that was a joke. I think I have. I don't even know how many I have. Probably I'm probably in a negative, I'm probably probably people that left, but anyway.

Speaker 1: 1:09

So rejection and wanting a relationship with someone that doesn't want you that it's rejection is, in my opinion, it's bad for the soul but good for the character, if that makes sense. So rejection is a thing, but to me it's also just not getting something that you want and we just see it as being rejected. But really, in its essence, to me it's just not getting something that you want and in turn we say we were rejected. But I think of it like this If we got everything we wanted, we wouldn't value anything. So that's why I think rejection is bad for the soul but good for the character, because it builds character. It's like, hey, I know you've, we've all met a person that well kids that are spoiled, adults that are spoiled, people that have gotten everything that they wanted and they don't value things as much. Rejection is not a thing to them because they don't either get rejected or they end up just receiving stuff that they want people, things, materials, stuff like that. Anyway, I say I am I am, you know, well versed in rejection. I've been rejected by people, jobs, things I don't know, animals you know what I'm saying Clients. So I mean, I know a little bit about rejection or not getting what I want, and I have a pretty decent character. It makes me, it makes me value the things that I have, the, the relationships that I have, the stuff that I have worked hard for or maintained, in a sense, but anyway, so I'm getting a little off track. So back on track, so I don't be whack, being rejected. I'm going to, I'm going to turn this into the. It's going to be like I'm going down the relationship road. So I'm talking in terms of relationships. So wanting someone that may not necessarily want the same thing that you want with you, and how to deal with that, how to deal with that is just really, in its essence, it is what it is. If you know what's going on, then you have to put your you know if you're an adult, because this could happen to you know, at any age teenagers, teenage love and stuff like that but if you're an adult, you got to put your adult hat on and say, hey, this is the situation, just like if you were applying to a job.

Speaker 1: 4:10

I hate, I hate. I hate to talk about relationships like jobs, but essentially, like it is one, they can be one, you know, a date turns into an interview or a relationship turns into a duty, right, just like a job. But anyway, like it's just like a job, if you don't get hired for the job that you want, then you just, you just don't. You don't keep applying, or you can, I guess, because maybe it wasn't the right time, but a lot of times when it comes to people liking people, you can't force it. You know what I mean. You just gotta go with the flow.

Speaker 1: 4:53

It sucks, it's not great, but in essence you gotta think about it. It's like you just not getting something that you want and really that is. I'm going down another road, I'm going down the side trail, the bike trail right now. But in essence you gotta look at it as what causes pain. I don't mean like somebody punching you in the face. I'm talking about, like, emotional pain, emotional pain and just hear me out Emotional pain. I guess you have no choice but to hear me out, because I'm the only one talking on this thing. But emotional pain comes from just not getting something that you want, so it comes at a loss. So a loss means you don't have something that you want to have, right, and it causes pain and hurt. And that's where rejection is At the core of everything. It's just not having something that you want and dealing with that and with that it's. We kind of make up stuff Like rejection, we call it rejection. It's not rejection, it's not having something that you want. I'm gonna like I said that 13 times already, I'm counting. But that is the essence of it and when you can deal with that, you have enough character to deal with that and know yourself and know that is the core issue. I mean emotional pain is just one thing. It's not having something that you want and that's like knowing it is the first step of being able to deal with it.

Speaker 1: 6:42

Like this is how did this become a serious show? This is a serious show. This episode Like this is crazy, but I got it. I gotta spit that knowledge though. I got it. I'm sharing my knowledge with the world. Like this is my gift to you all. Is my brain. The stuff that I have in my brain you need to know because it's golden.

Speaker 1: 7:09

But anyway, back to the subject. So dealing with it, um, I don't have some encyclopedia Britannica type definition for a solution, it's just really dealing with it. It's knowing what the issue is. That is the core of problem solving, is knowing what the problem is right, and then you could figure out how to attack it. It's you knowing that you are not getting, or you don't have the ability to get, something that you want, and relationship wise or person wise. If you attack that, then that's the battle. You know what I mean. If you know, if you walk into a candy store and you have diabetes, you can't have this candy bar and you're upset. The candy bar didn't reject you, you just can't have it for other reasons, right, I don't know if that's a good analogy, but I'm sticking with it. But what do you? Do you adjust? You say, hey, you know what, I can't have this candy bar. I'll just start eating fruit, I guess, and maybe that'll substitute. But when am I going with this? You know what I'm saying, but dealing with it is a part of me. Dealing with it is it's not even dealing with it, it's dealing with yourself. You know what I mean. It really is just dealing with yourself. Because, yeah, you got to.

Speaker 1: 8:58

If you look at it like, why am I saying this so much? I'm unable to get what I want, what I desire right now. If you look at it like that, it's like, well, maybe I should just assess my desires. You start looking at that. Then it's like, maybe I should assess myself, maybe I should look at this space that I'm in, I mean relationship-wise, mentally, because everything that you want is not in the space necessarily good for you. Then you got to look at why do I want this? Why do I want this person? Why do I want this candy bar? Why do I want this new car? What is it? Do I just like it? Am I in my possession, do I just want to possess? You know what I mean? You got to peel back the layers. You got to get to the middle of that onion. I'll bet it's still an onion. You just got to get down, you got to get down, you got to get down.

Speaker 1: 10:08

But yeah, I think, man, that was like some straight up Albert Einstein Well, not Albert Einstein, he wasn't. What is it? Who's a well-known philosopher I'm spitting straight philosophy right now, although it is to sum it up because I'm tired of talking about it, but I still want to. Anyway, it's not rejection, it's you not getting what you want. Look at what you want, look at wanting stuff. Why do you want stuff?

Speaker 1: 10:48

Everything doesn't have to fit in your box. If you got everything that you wanted, you'd be a spoiled Millennial. But I don't know, I don't want to Joke on millennials, I just it's because the last show was about Gen X, which is like Probably the best generation ever. But if you got everything you wanted, you you probably would not. Your character would take a hit, you not. You not getting what you want. Your soul takes a hit, but your character, you know, becomes solid and that and that, uh, you know that that Builds you up for when you actually get what you want. I mean this, this, you'll be a better person, and All of that.

Speaker 1: 11:36

So, anyway, I don't mean for it to be a serious show, but every now and again I got a half one I have a serious show. I gotta spit that philosophy because I got a lot of things on the brain and I'm, uh, I'm pretty. I'm like, I'm, I'm in, like the top 1% in in Intelligence. I'll just say that like I'm pretty, I'm pretty smart man, like I'm so smart, like I drive myself crazy. It's like insanity is the what is it? Insanity is product of Non-ignorance, I don't know. But whatever, I just said, I just made it up. So, anyway, uh, that's all that.