The Joys of Parenting an Only Child

Join me in Episode 13 of Love in Focus: Building Community with an Only Child, where I dive into the world of parenting an only child. I share my joyful experiences and cherished moments discovering the unique bond I've cultivated, from travels to shopping adventures tailored just for one and having heart to heart conversations with your child. Tune in to celebrate the joys of parenting an only child and relish the love and connection that shine through. 

Transcript

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Hi, my name is Four and welcome to The Love and Focus, the podcast for Mans where we explore, discover, build community with our only child. Let's get going. Okay, you know what I mean. Let's start with the program. Oh my goodness. Hi, this episode I wanted to share some of the things that I love being why I love being um a mum of an only child. And one of the things is one um that Olivia and I have formed a really close bond. Um and from my experience with my only child is that when I'm with her, I'm with her. I mean, and that makes her of course you're with her, but I'm not focusing on anything else. I she has my full attention and I'm really engaging what she is learning and doing. I'm not distracted with what else is going on, um, for most part. And I can only say that because um I'm the youngest of five, and I'm sure my parents did the best they could with the time that was given when they were with me and my siblings, and they showed love to everybody. But spending that quality one-on-one on time with, um, you know, I'm sure look, they couldn't always spend time with everybody because they had other um commitments as well. So with Olivia, all I know is I have one child, and my time with her is just my time with her. And I love that. And because of that relationship and the dynamics of having an only child, um, I'm really close to her and she's close to me. Even though she says her and dad are twinsies because they have similar uh characteristics and they um the the what do you call it, they do little things like ha, you get that from your dad, and they love it. So um what else I love of being a a mom of only one, it is easy to go places and take my child. Um, because I just have to hold her hand, and if when she was in the stroller, I can just go, I can pick her up, I can get her in the car, and I can leave. And I love that about going into places. Uh for me, it's quicker, me and my husband, and I'm not saying that, you know, we don't have drama mama or drama child or draw my daddy in the car. We're like, you know, as parents do, and kids, sometimes it's not like everyone's not having a good time. Just saying where we need to go from A to B, most places, I mean, in most cases, it's a lot quicker. And I say a lot quicker first because we just get up and go. And I love that about our family. We can just leave and you know, take what we need in my car. I'm not I'm only gonna like when she was a baby, like one stroller and one of something. Um in my bag, I just could just fit what she and her and I needed. And I've always loved that about being a you know, mom of an only child. And also what I love is babysitting, and I say that because my grandparents or her great-grandparents, you know, like, hey, can you babysit Olivia? You know, just bringing out a child, and I feel like I don't know, because we only have one child, it's easier for them, but it's good for us, and that's what I love too, and also shopping, buying clothes for her. Well, I love buying clothes for her because a mama loves buying cute things for her, and it's fun, and I can splurge a little bit more, and only because I've had some conversations with some friends with multiple children, and they tell me they couldn't always, not that they didn't, but sometimes they have to wait a little bit longer, and depending on your budget, too. Uh, I'm just saying for us, I can splurge a little bit more on her shoes or a little bit more on a dress, um, because I only have one child, and that's uh it's awesome for me, and also I like it when we go to places, I'm just focusing uh when we go shopping or uh community events. Um I didn't I don't have to be I'm only looking out for Olivia, if that makes sense, and she she's really good. I didn't ever have to tell her to hold on to the stroller when mummy's walking or hold my hand. She she must have watched it from somewhere. I seriously, because she would just hold my hand. I think there was only one time when she was little, she she wanted to be adventurous, and she ran around a clothing rat. We're at a like a clothing store, and I couldn't find her, and then I turned around and I was like, Olivia, Olivia, and she thought that was funny until you know I had a good talking with her, and I said, Mommy can't find you, so you have to be, you know, you gotta stay with me because I love you so much, and we shop together, and that's what we do, mommy and mommy and you, okay. And since then, um, she's been really good. Uh, she's always held on to my hand. She's always the first one to hold on to my hand when we go to places. Not to say I won't grab her hand, but she was like, Mummy, hold my hand. Or when I'm going shopping at Walmart, uh, she'll hold on to the trolley. I didn't, I was never concerned about her running off. She was not that child. So I'm like, woohoo, because I don't know what I don't know, right? I don't know if children naturally run off, but mine didn't. Olivia does not. She's always um hovering, she's always close by, meaning she's either by my side or she's holding on to the stroller. And every now and then, if she sees a horse or something, she'll be like, Mom, or we're going places and she sees something fun, she'll say, Mom, can I go there? So for me, traveling, going to places, picking up what she needs, I mean, and taking the equipment or putting things in my bag, it's easy because it I'm just focusing on her and myself, and unless my husband's coming with her, coming with us, but packing, putting things in my purse, in my bag, um is quick, and I don't and I love that. So, and another thing I love about um being a mother of our only child is that the conversations we have are hilarious. I notice that as she's getting older, I feel like it's more um there's a lot of how do you say feelings. She will express more of how she is feeling or what she's thinking, or um, it's almost like they trust, like because we're so close, she wants to share more of her heart. And I love that because uh her only being six, uh, she's she's giving insights to me, like mommy, this is how I can I share with you about something, and I love that. So most sometimes I get surprised about things, and sometimes she'll tell me how I'm doing as a mom. Yeah, like one time she said, Mom, can I tell you? And I said, Yeah, what do you want to tell me? And she said, Mom, I just feel like um sometimes when we have other children at our house, you might pay more attention to them than me. And I was like, Huh? When and she'll give me an example, and then I realized I had to really realize, okay, so we've always since she's an only child, and mommy has always when I'm engaging, she has my full attention, you know, I'm being aware of what's going on around her, and I'm like just um okay, I'm really like focusing on her, right? And so when other kids coming along and we're playing all together, I also naturally will pay attention to them. You know what I mean? So she might interpret that as an I'm not paying attention to her anymore, which is not the case, because that's another learning of okay, now that you have other kids, you gotta share your time with mommy. That doesn't mean I don't love you, it just means that there are people here, and it is polite, and you're not always gonna be the focus, which is another conversation altogether. So that was good for her to express that to me, and for me just to listen to her heart. So that's what I love about being um a mum with an only child, just how her and I communicate, um, as much, you know, how we communicate heart to heart and how that is growing. Now, there are other times where I get it wrong, folks, where she tells me stuff and I'm like, no, yeah, and I'm still learning about that, and she is learning too how to express herself in a kind way as well, and so um I love that because I spend you know, I spend lots of time with Olivia, you know, I'm either playing or cooking dinner together, or we're reading together, you know, or I'm entertaining her, you know, I'm really pressing into her heart, really asking God, you know, just show me how to speak to her heart, and through that and just me being the best mom for her, um, is wanting to know how she thinks, how she, you know, learns. Because I want to I want to, you know, be her awesome teacher, and she has a lot of teachers, and you know, she's gonna have a lot of teachers and mentors when she grows up. I want her to say that I was the best teacher for her because I took the time to get to know her. I took the time to love on her, I took the time to listen to her, I took the time to take interest in her, I took the time to engage and encourage her as a mom and as you know, as her mom, but also she's her own person, and I want to do that. So that was I wanted to encourage you, mums, as your child is growing up. I wanted to remind you that you are the best mom for your child, and as you're spending time with them, there's so many positives, there's so many wonderful encouragements. So, things when you go out in public, you know, you get to get up and go, you know, just grab what they need and just take them. You can just hold your hand, you know, you got a hand, one hand for them, and one hand for your husband, and off you go, and you can swing them up and down. She loves that, she loves being in the middle, she loves to swing, and so, and I'm saying this because I just wanted to remind you, you are the best mom for your child, and you are the doing the best you can during this season with the time that's given. Like, uh you, I tell you this. I I pray that you're looking in the mirror and you're saying that you are wonderful because you truly are, you're loving on your family, you're loving on this child, and we're gonna do some whoopsie daisy things. Like, what was that all about? Like, I was just a tired, you know, like say I was tired, but I didn't what what the hungry and whatever, the crying and you know, either, and you gotta housework and you're doing work, and it's just a lot, but you are doing the best you can. So I pray that you take the time just to be kind to yourself, and you're a wonderful friend. And remember, I tell my friends, you wanna have a friend, you gotta be a friend, but remember to be a friend to yourself because you are the best person that you can be, you are doing your best, and treat yourself something true as truly. I mean, seriously, do something nice for you and take some time as you know, as you are loving on your child and helping them, you know, and as you're getting to know each time you're getting to know their heart. I mean, who who does it? Who who really loves on I mean, who really loves the child? I mean, we all love our child. But I just wanted you to hear my heart, moms, be kind to yourself, and you are the best child, best mother for your child, and you are raising a beautiful, strong person, a beautiful person, and they are so absolutely wonderful, and your community is blessed to have you and your family, they truly are, and so moms. If you're hearing this, I want to say to you, you can say to everyone, you're welcome. I do, I say that to my family. You're welcome, you're welcome, you're welcome. Crack myself up. Well, this is four, and you're listening to Love and Focus, building a community with an only child, and thank you for listening. We're building love, love and focus one episode at a time. Take care, thank you for liking and subscribing to my channel. I will why do I say I will see you in the next episode? We will meet in the next episode. Bye.