Stepping into the frame of self-appreciation, my conversation with the talented Amber Weitzel illuminates the path to building self-esteem with the lens of gratitude. While recalling the insecurity-laden teenage years, we uncover the power of recognizing our own beauty and worth, untethered from society's harsh judgments. Amber's experiences as a photographer provide a unique perspective on how capturing one's essence can lead to profound self-confidence, and we discuss the vital role of positive affirmations—those we tell ourselves and those rooted in our faith—to anchor our value beyond the material world.
Facing adversity is an inevitable part of life, but it's the resilience forged by faith and prayer that can turn the tides. Amber and I explore how even when negativity encroaches, especially from those we hold dear, the teachings of scripture, like the wisdom found in Matthew 5:44, remind us to let go of past hurts and adopt a heart of compassion and forgiveness. We dive into the necessity of maintaining an inner kindness and the profound impact of praying positively for ourselves and for those who challenge us, keeping our hearts aligned with the love and understanding Jesus championed amidst conflict.
Stepping into the frame of self-appreciation, my conversation with the talented Amber Weitzel illuminates the path to building self-esteem with the lens of gratitude. While recalling the insecurity-laden teenage years, we uncover the power of recognizing our own beauty and worth, untethered from society's harsh judgments. Amber's experiences as a photographer provide a unique perspective on how capturing one's essence can lead to profound self-confidence, and we discuss the vital role of positive affirmations—those we tell ourselves and those rooted in our faith—to anchor our value beyond the material world.
Facing adversity is an inevitable part of life, but it's the resilience forged by faith and prayer that can turn the tides. Amber and I explore how even when negativity encroaches, especially from those we hold dear, the teachings of scripture, like the wisdom found in Matthew 5:44, remind us to let go of past hurts and adopt a heart of compassion and forgiveness. We dive into the necessity of maintaining an inner kindness and the profound impact of praying positively for ourselves and for those who challenge us, keeping our hearts aligned with the love and understanding Jesus championed amidst conflict.
Hi, I'm Renee Richel, the founder and president of 1True Match. I'm here to help you find and cultivate the love of your life. For over a decade, I've dedicated my life to the importance, purpose and dynamic of human relationships. My team and I are disciplined by faith, love and integrity to help our clients find the quality relationship they've always dreamt of. Each week, I will be sharing the tools and tips I've learned that have rooted my success as a matchmaker with other leaders around the world. Hello, loves, welcome back.
Renee Richel:I am beyond excited to be sitting here with Amber Weitzel to talk about self-esteem today, and I couldn't think of a better guest than Amber, who is also a renowned photographer. She also does videography, which she is going to help us with some edits, even with our podcast and everything else. She's just an incredible person. That I thought today when we were talking about. So many times our clients go through like either self-esteem or we get down on ourselves, and not just our clients, just people in general we know. So I thought today there's no better person than to bring you in, amber, to talk about this. So let's begin.
Amber Weitzel:Yes, I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for having me. It's such an important topic to talk about. Like you said, you know, I really love to use photography to empower people and just really make them feel loved on. You know, I think that showing their personality through the camera lens is something that just really brings me joy.
Renee Richel:Yeah, no, I totally agree, and I have to tell a little story because not everybody knows you right, and it's all about getting personal and just kind of sharing our journey too, of how we got to where we are. So, I've known Amber since she was a teenager.
Renee Richel:Yes, you're like obviously a grown adult doing fabulous and she does a lot of our clients and just keeps everybody I mean everybody's so afraid it feels like a photography. Yes, what I want to go back to is a little bit about your story when I remember we would get together.
Renee Richel:What was it like monthly or something, oh my gosh, and we would have coffee talk conversations, because I love my teenagers, I'm like it's always important to have somebody you can just talk to and share because, let's be honest, those years are tough. Yes, and regardless, if you're, you know, trying to just figure out your I mean, you're basically figuring out your identity of who you are yeah, and there's a lot of peer pressure in schools, right, there's a lot, especially even today. Back in the day it was nowhere near what it is today and we thought it was tough, right. Right, want to share a little bit about here, a little bit about your story to share with the audience of, like, what you went through when you were obviously younger, trying to kind of find your place. You'd gone to a couple different schools just because you were excelling and advancing in your, you know, obviously, education and whatnot.
Renee Richel:And personally, myself started off that same way. I was the first one to have glasses, I was the first one that was taller than everybody. I was the first one to get braces. I kind of had that like ugly duckling feeling internally.
Renee Richel:So, share your story and then we're going to dive into a little bit more to just help everybody when it comes to this big topic.
Amber Weitzel:Yeah, I mean, I think that for me it was really tough.
Amber Weitzel:Also, I feel like I kind of shared that ugly duckling mentality a little bit I was shorter than everybody, hence why we related I got what you were saying, and you've always been like a second mom to me, and so it was always nice to be able to chat with you and have that outlet, to kind of just feel more confident during those times where it was hard, you know, to relate to people and to to find connections in a place that's very judgmental.
Amber Weitzel:I feel like school is just always very you know. Oh well, if you didn't have this set of shoes or this set of clothes, you know you weren't the cool kid, you know. So I feel like you know that's honestly where I found my love for photography, because I feel like people get to see the best parts about themselves visually, you know them laughing or them having the best experience behind, like in front of the camera, and me being able to give that to them, and then them being like, oh, I really am beautiful. You know, yes, you are. You know. So it was, it was a time for sure.
Renee Richel:And I say you know it's funny. There's a video of Connie, obviously yes. Connie that's watched our podcast. Um, when she first met Olivia and she was starting to kind of not first meeting Olivia, but she was starting to take, like her first steps and there's a, there's a camera or a video of Connie telling Olivia to say I am beautiful. And it's so cute because, of course, she's got a British accent yeah, olivia, and.
Renee Richel:Olivia is trying to repeat it and it's on, like her camera that she can see at night or whatever when she goes to bed. Yeah, and it's just a reminder of like to tell ourselves that more frequently. Yeah, and to tell it to ourselves even at a young age, right.
Amber Weitzel:Those affirmations are so important, for sure, I mean, I think that that's also why, like the morning, starting off your morning with reading the Bible and really getting into God's word, I think that really helps with the affirmation of everything and just reminding, like who he says, that we are, instead of like who the world says we are Because the world is constantly going to be tearing us down.
Renee Richel:Yes, and not intentionally, but it's also. We want to help people, but then sometimes that's what kind of tears us down too.
Renee Richel:I think comparison is the worst nature of the beast, also Right and kind of I mean you watch and witness what people have, which can also be detrimental to just your whole self-esteem is what we're talking about right, like I mean I can't tell you how many times we tell our clients, we tell our matches even people we've then matched right that then see other people's lives right Because they found somebody that builds them up and you know, takes them to the next level and vice versa. It's a whole different. You know experience, but when people are out there, you know meeting people or even just in their own relationship. I can't tell you how many times we say it like stop comparing your relationship to other people or stop comparing your life to other individuals, because God made you uniquely unique for a reason.
Amber Weitzel:And I think that you know, when you start to compare and you start to, you know, be like oh, I need to be like this person, or I need to act like this person, you miss the best part about yourself. Like you said, you miss that thing that makes you special, makes you unique.
Renee Richel:Right.
Amber Weitzel:And God's got an ultimate plan and purpose and that can't be carried out. If you're trying to be Sally Jo over here, you know, instead of yourself.
Renee Richel:Right, right so.
Amber Weitzel:I think that you know it's about embracing who you are and surrounding yourself with people that are going to really lift you up and make you feel good.
Renee Richel:Yeah, I totally agree, and one of the things we always give a tip on is it's so important to practice gratitude, of course, because how many times do we just like go through the day and then we're like, oh, this didn't work out, that didn't work out. You know that question. I always say at the end of the day, how was your day? It's like well, either you're still in it or maybe you didn't achieve everything that you wanted to. So it's so easy to kind of get down on yourself that I always say, like you know, what are you grateful today for is a better way of looking at it than asking, like, well, what did you accomplish?
Renee Richel:today right Right it could have been like your to-do list, even just like got 10 times longer, right. Right, like all those things that bring down your level of confidence in a very small way but piles up over a period of time. You know, yeah, so it's important to practice gratitude I would say every day, as much as you can, for all the things that God has given you.
Amber Weitzel:Yeah, I think even the smallest things it can be. You know well, I had a good trip to the grocery store. They had everything at the store I needed. Or you know something silly there wasn't any traffic today on the road. You know, something super small can even make your day be like, okay, well, at least God had that today, you know. And so it doesn't have to be something big and monumentous. You know, it's just thanking for the little things too.
Renee Richel:Yeah, absolutely, which gives you just again good self-esteem. And then another thing is to like take note of the negativity that surrounds you, right, it's around us all the time and we don't even know that, like Satan or whatever, is creeping in to our world, tearing us down when things are great. I mean, how many times are you in a moment where you're like today is the best day ever, I just want to stay in this moment Right, right, but you know it's not going to last.
Renee Richel:You're grateful for like whatever that high is or whatever's just happened. That's just incredibly amazing. Yeah, I always give everybody the jelly jar experience. In my head I've got like a ton of jelly jar shelves behind me, right. Yeah, that is like constantly like these moments. I put into a jelly jar that I can open up the lid anytime. I need a little bit of that positivity. I love that. And anytime it's like negative, I'm like the lid is closed, right, and once it's forgiven or it's let go.
Amber Weitzel:I can't wait to smash that jelly jar and let it go right, right. And you know, I think the enemy is tricky. You know he's not going to always come at you and you're going to be like, oh well, that's not true. You know he's going to hit you at your lowest moment sometime and your weakest spot, and I think that's why it's so important to be so rooted in your faith, because that helps you in those moments to open the jelly jar or to say, okay, I remember the good times, you know, like a tick, this is not going to hurt me today, you know.
Renee Richel:There's people I mean so many times, especially in relationships, whether it be personal, whether it be friendships, whether it be a romantic relationship, whether it be somebody that's gone through a narcissistic relationship or an abusive relationship or anything like that.
Renee Richel:The truth is, if anybody says something to you that's not true, remember that it is what they're projecting on you, that they're probably believing themselves. I'll never forget that when I was really like, it hit me being in a toxic relationship where it was like that truth was like so eye-opening when you're out of it Right, when you actually see it from different lenses instead of being in it because you don't really realize it, because they've torn you down so low to a level where it's like you start to believe it yourself.
Amber Weitzel:Right.
Renee Richel:And God made you to be pure. God made you to be amazing. Yes, and so I always say, like ditch the negativity, ditch the haters right, because it's not intentional directed to you, it's their own anger inside of them that that needs healing Right. And, of course, like I always say, you know, matthews, 544 is really good at basically saying you know, love your neighbors, love your haters you know love your enemies is what it says and pray for them, which sounds so difficult when you're so angry or you're so upset at somebody.
Renee Richel:And I had a new potential client come in yesterday that I was chatting with and he's been divorced now for about a year and he's like I'm still so angry at her right. There was cheating involved and all this other stuff and I said at the end of the day, the day that you will be free will be the day that you pray for her and you let it go.
Amber Weitzel:And it's so hard.
Renee Richel:I know people are like well, I've forgiven, but I haven't, I can't forget. Well, you haven't let it go Right.
Renee Richel:Like you have not literally released the shackles or the chains to let that negativity go and free you, Because the minute that I could actually pray for, anybody that's you know throws darts at you or somebody that's you know obviously saying anything negative. That's not true, Right, and they don't know. I take that to the Lord because he knows, he knows what the truth is and he knows obviously everything that we need to remind ourselves for self-esteem. So remember Matthews 544. Yes, Recite that every day to remember to love your enemies in that regards and pray for them as well.
Amber Weitzel:Those are the people that I feel like you know, need the most love, you know, and I think that God calls us to love all you know. It's not like, oh well, just these people, just this person, it's everyone. And it's so important to remember what loving somebody looks like. Love is patient and kind. And if you're still holding these grudges and thinking about all these things, well, that one Wednesday, when they told me that one thing you know, but you might be the person that brightens their day and turns it around for them, you never know what someone's going through and why that their spirit is in that negative place. Yeah, so you can be the one to kind of show them a light in the day, you know, and kind of kill them kindness a little bit you know Well and I remember when you were little there were so many.
Renee Richel:I mean, there's just bullies, right? Like in school and things like that. And you know I'm always like kill them with kindness, right?
Amber Weitzel:Yes.
Renee Richel:Perform some act of kindness to somebody else, even when you don't feel like it. Yeah, because the outcome at the end of the day, right, whatever, however long God gives us each day is. I would rather know that I treated others like Jesus would, right, even though it hurts, then go out saying, like you know, obviously, two wrongs don't make a right right.
Amber Weitzel:We're all going to have to answer to what we did one day when I get up there I want to be able to say you know, I did my best to love and, you know, walk how Jesus did, like you said, you know. And so I think it's also harder when it's not a stranger, you know. When it's somebody that's closer to you, like you said, in a toxic relationship, or a family member or a close friend, you know, I think that's even harder to do when it's somebody close.
Renee Richel:And to be reminded of. Okay, clearly, they're dealing with something tougher than I am Right, so don't react. Process, reflect and pray, exactly Right. And then, that way I always say, 72 hours during that process in the first 24 hours is still bothering you. Probably Right. In 48 hours is it bothering you as much as it was in the first 24 hours? Yes, probably not as much, because now you're moving on, you're doing something else, and then, by 72, is it something that you address to like overcome this conflict so it doesn't continue to happen, or is it something that you can just brush off your shoulders and instead pray for that person? Yeah, pray for like answers and direction, and then also just know that you know they're going through a tough time too and they didn't mean any of it.
Amber Weitzel:And that's what.
Renee Richel:I'm talking about Like you brush that off, you ditch that emotion and don't let it affect you, which it will.
Amber Weitzel:Right, let's be honest Right.
Renee Richel:None of us are perfect, but when you literally surrender and give it all to the Lord, it's amazing how he just comes down and hugs on you and loves on you and is like you are beautiful, right yeah?
Amber Weitzel:Inside and out. Yeah, it's really good to. I think you know, in my experience you know I feel like it's good to have those ride or dies that you can also process things with. You know the people that are going to lift you up and the people that are a safe space to go to to kind of rest and reflect and say, am I crazy or or what's actually going on or what's happening, and it's going to point you back to Jesus at the end of it.
Renee Richel:You know yeah.
Amber Weitzel:Because we do need that kind of time. I can't audibly hear God sometimes, so it's nice to kind of have somebody to reflect with and that's why, those moments with you, when I was going through a lot of the bullying and all of the things, it was so much better to have that wiser voice in my life you know, and I just really always appreciated and valued those times with you.
Renee Richel:Oh, I love that Every moment. And today we get to say, like you know, still those moments which are special and we're going through different phases of life, right. But at the end of the day, the root of it all that gives us that strength and gives us that confidence is our faith right. And I mean, I had to learn how to pray. I didn't know how to pray. I was like, okay, how do you pray? Right, and it's something that I always say. It's conversations with God.
Amber Weitzel:Yeah.
Renee Richel:And not asking him for what it is you want. It's more saying I know you know the desires of my heart better than I am. You know the desires of my heart better than I am, and this is in your timing and your plan. And if you're struggling with self-esteem or you feel like why can't I get this or why can't I get that, first of all that attitude needs to just go out the door, right, because God has a better plan than you'll ever imagine. Just like when our couples, we introduced them to somebody they would have never imagined they are beginning their life with right.
Renee Richel:It's the same thing. So get out of your own mind, get out of your own way and put all the focus on whatever it is that brings you to your best level of who you can be, because that's when things start to spiral down and your self-esteem is like shot right.
Amber Weitzel:Right, right, and you know, I think the power of prayer is so true, I mean, I think that you don't even there's no.
Amber Weitzel:I was told once there's no wrong way to pray. You know God's not going to be like, oh man, well, you didn't say this or that. You know it's a conversation and sometimes I was also told once that sometimes you can just sit in the presence of the Lord and just say God, you know everything that's going on and you know just, he'll meet you where you're at, He'll accept you with where you're at and you're never too broken or too far gone or too lost to come to him and get loving on. And I think in those moments, for myself personally, I think it's good for me to just get outside, I turn on my worship music and I just kind of, like you said, be still in his presence, and that just kind of washes over me and helps me to remember okay, God, I know that you can turn incredible good from incredible bad and there will be power in that purpose, Like you're going to make purpose out of this.
Renee Richel:Exactly. I love that, and I think what you were saying too is you know, take a minute, take a pause or wherever it is, be active, right? I think that's the other thing. It's like so many times. I mean, we're all human, right.
Renee Richel:When you get in a funk or you get in a slum or whatever. It's like you kind of retreat into just like a dormant stage. Yeah, and then you wonder why it keeps getting worse and worse and worse. And it's because, a you're probably not having deep conversations with the Lord Right and, b you're not being active, whether it be like I. Every time I need to pray, I need a body of water, whether it be the river, it be the ocean or whatever.
Amber Weitzel:Yes.
Renee Richel:Needs to be more than a pool, but like some type of like form of God's beauty, right, something that God created, which was the river, which was the ocean, and it reminds me how small whatever I'm going through is compared to how big the ocean is, or the river, or whatever that God has created and all the work that he's done. That I couldn't even do a sliver of right, and so it's kind of just a way to just release whatever pressure is building up and then fill it with God's oxygen.
Renee Richel:I always say, you know, like when you're flying, they always say you know you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you can help your seatmate, right, because if you're gone, so is your seatmate. So it always seems a little bit backwards because you want to help somebody else. But that's a moment where I always say put that oxygen mask on yourself and fueled with oxygen of God, and it's amazing how it's like you take the deepest breath and you breathe out the biggest force. Yes, and it's just a whole different experience every time you get into those like kind of self-esteem areas and you know I mean we talk a lot about you know fashion and how to, you know, be trendy and especially if you're single out there, even if you're dating, even if you're married, right, it's still putting that effort in to you know, feel whatever it is makes you sexy, attractive and alive. Yes, and giving people compliments always just builds your own self-esteem, right, because usually people give compliments back. But internally is what the biggest like force comes from self-esteem, and so if you don't feel it inside, you're not going to feel it on the outside, right, right. And so at the end and in our cases, obviously, when we're finding clients' matches, we want them to be beautiful inside and out, because there has to be that romance of attraction, right, but I always tell everybody the core is what's most important. So be yourself. Just elevate yourself to another level and tell yourself you are beautiful and you can do anything.
Renee Richel:I mean, I used to be afraid of public speaking. I really did. I was so afraid to ever get on a stage. I had all these different things that were kind of working against me and I was like now I use that as I remember going through like I can do this. God has given me this gift to help people, to empower people and do something with it. So instead of me looking at through like I can do this, god has given me this gift to help people, to empower people and do something with it. So instead of me looking at it like I'm afraid, it was more like God is giving me this gift, so I need to make him proud, right? And you overcome that by telling yourself I can do this, I can do this a million times, right, and guess what you can Mind over matter. God gave us the most powerful, beautiful tool, which is our mind, and so what we fuel ourself with is a big reason of our level of self-esteem.
Amber Weitzel:I agree completely. I mean, I think that your mind can also play tricks on you too, yes, so it's super important to fill it with positivity.
Renee Richel:It's like the good and bad angel right, Right.
Amber Weitzel:And there's this song that I love. It's called Give Me your Eyes and it says give me your eyes to listen, give me your eyes to see. And in moments where my enemies are getting to me or where somebody said something mean to me, I always pray and I say God, let me see them the way that you see them. Give me your eyes so I can see the beauty in this situation, so I can see your purpose. We're never going to understand or be able to fathom God's ultimate plan for us, but it's about trusting when you can't see the whole staircase right. It's about knowing that God's got me, no matter what I go through, and I think that that's so powerful when you know, like you said, you overcame your fear for public speaking and things like that, like that's from the ugly duckling syndrome to that.
Amber Weitzel:I mean that's a big step, you know and you probably never would have thought at that point that you'd be public speaking. Now, you know, on a podcast and so you know, I think that you know, if you're nervous for you know on a first date and you're single or things like that like it's important to say God, you've got this and I know that my person is already set and this is going to go well and your hand is over the situation, you know, and it's just really trusting in his ultimate plan has really helped me get through the toughest things in life, you know.
Renee Richel:Right, Like they say let God let go. Yes, and I'm so beyond proud of you and I know every day.
Renee Richel:We're still learning and we're always. You need to always be thirsting for more. Yes, right, it's also who you surround yourself with is so important. So ditch the haters. I always say that. Tear you down, yes. And to remember to frequently have conversations with God on a regular basis. And I love the line where they always say if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. So remember, he is the one who has that plan ultimately for you, just like Amber has said. So we hope that you have found this helpful and beneficial. I feel like we could talk and go on and on about this for endless conversations right we can talk.
Renee Richel:So we appreciate it when you write in and you share your thoughts and things you want us to talk about. We have this podcast every Thursday talking about all of relevant topics that people are going through or just things they want us to share. So please continue to write in and we hope that you have a blessed week and these tips you will apply on a daily basis. Check out our other podcast. We are going to love and leave you and have a blessed week, and these tips you will apply on a daily basis. Check out our other podcast. We are going to love and leave you and have a blessed day. It's been another great talk on this episode of One True Talks by Renee Rochelle. I look forward to our next chat. Please write in your questions and comments so I can be sure to talk about whatever it is you want to discuss in our next upcoming episode. Lots of love, God bless. Xoxo.