Part 2 Cooking Up Equality in the Kitchen of Contemporary Relationships

Ever wondered how the balance of power shifts when she earns more than he does? Your boy CJ Moneyway, along with Ric and Jalen, are here to rip up the rulebook on gender roles and financial dynamics in relationships. No guests, just us – and we're serving up a platter of raw truth about leadership in the household, breaking free from the chains of who earns the paycheck. It's a deep dive into supporting each other's growth, redefining leadership, and the fact that a man's worth isn't measured by his bank account.

We're turning the tables on the concept of "submission" and what it really means in the context of respect and support in partnerships. Expect a robust discussion on the challenges faced by men in the modern era, where being the breadwinner isn't a given. We're calling out the double standards and emphasizing that true headship in a relationship isn't about who signs the checks. It's about strength, leadership, and the mutual respect that forms the bedrock of a solid partnership.

We’ll wrap it all up by exploring how personal fulfillment and individual choice play pivotal roles in a relationship's success. We're not just talking about love and money – we're getting into the grit of personal accountability, spiritual guidance, and the importance of recognizing both partners' contributions. Because when the love is real, it's not about who's the provider or who wears the pants – it's about walking that path together, building something that's about more than just dollars and cents. Join us, tune in, and let's get real about modern love and the power dynamics that shape our relationships.

Welcome to The CJ Moneyway Show Podcast! The Podcast Show where we Unlock Potential, One Dream at a Time. Today, we have another guest whose journey is truly worth hearing. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the Moneyway experience.

Don't miss out on CJ Moneyway's book, "Both Eyes Open and Both Eyes Shut." And get ready to pre-order his upcoming release, "The Issues of Life," coming soon. Moneyway aiming to inspire!

Thank you for listening to The CJ Moneyway Show! Don't forget to share this episode with your friends, leave a comment, and drop a review. Be sure to tune in every Tuesday and Friday for more inspiring journeys. Who knows, your story might be next. 

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:16

If that woman makes more than you, as a man, you're nothing. You submit some time. As a man, you're nothing In reality, if a man makes $60,000 and that lady makes $75,000, does that make him less of a man? Absolutely not. In general, we have become weaker and so by becoming weaker, a lot of men have been put out of position. She went to the pastor pastor looking at her ass. Honey, you know what I'm saying. But here's the part where we talked about from the jump, you got to be the head of the house. Your wife shouldn't be going to pastor first. What's up, my good people? This your boy, cj Moneyway. Welcome to the Moneyway Show.

Speaker 1: 0:56

I got a couple of my partners here today. Got my boy Rick, got my young man Jalen in here and we're going to talk about emotions period, saying that's going on both sides, men and women. So, rick J, which way y'all want to start this off, man, you know what I'm saying. I started off what's up? What's up Today, man 2024, I was just telling the guys this is just as emotional as the women and in these relationships today, that's why you got a power struggle.

Speaker 1: 1:22

The chick want to be out front just as much as the man want to be out front and then to flip the coin, get tough. He give it back to the chick and it's always supposed to be the man supposed to be in front. You're supposed to be. That's your place, what you think about that, john. But these days you got women that want to be the alpha. If you want to be the alpha, how can that man be the alpha? You know what I'm saying. Also, y'all go always collide, for sure, for sure, because you got to look at it.

Speaker 1: 1:48

These chicks today, man, for real, they like kids, they want to know where that line at. A new chick. She going to see where that line at when she grow up. Hey, look, I tell them, like this man, you better go muffle, untangle and slinky. You want to impress me? Untangle, slinky man, do something safe. You know what I'm saying. I'm not letting you you might could peek over that line, but we got a line here, true, you know what I'm saying. But, man, with these chicks and you know I'm shouting out to the chicks you got more entrepreneurs today. You got chicks working hard, but you still got a place and your place ain't in front of me as a man.

Speaker 1: 2:22

We gotta lead, supposed to. We supposed to lead, but that woman gotta you gotta trust your man to lead that way. Now, just cause I'm leading in certain things as I'm walking this path, you gonna see before I do. That's where the partnership's supposed to come in. Well, I guess my take on that is and this is to a woman's defense me personally, I ain't leading you nowhere. Why am I following you? I can lead you anywhere.

Speaker 1: 2:44

I'm just saying, though, but if you ain't got no good direction, if your life ain't going the way that you think that your life should be going, why should I follow you? Just because, no, I'm just saying Should I follow you and you ain't taking me nowhere? No, no, no, no, no. He got to have some direction, you got to have some direction. That woman should know her man has a direction. If that woman know her man has a direction. Again, it's certain things that you can have nine things out of it, but you might not see that tenth one as you're going through that field. You'll see it.

Speaker 1: 3:19

See, I believe women, they observe a lot more than we do. Exactly, you see what I'm talking about. They'll just say a woman is in the house, and then you know a woman's duties. A woman that does what she does? Yeah, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, a woman that does what she does. That's what they do, and so there's a lot of things that they do that we have no idea, no clue of what they actually do. So my thing is so, being observed, and I'm seeing the direction that you going in, or that you going in. So it's standing out there in the streets all the time, drinking all the time, smoking all the time, ain't got no ambitions in life or whatever. But yet still, as a man, I'm not seeing the discord that I'm having with her, because a lot of times miscommunication gets lost. But at the same time, in my mind, I'm still thinking that I'm leading somebody somewhere. She's going to do all the heavy lifting if she got that mentality of low self-esteem.

Speaker 1: 4:14

But as y'all said earlier you said this earlier that these aren't the same type of women, no more. You know what I'm saying. This is a different type of breed that we're dealing with right now. You want to know why? Social media that's a big part of it. Social media is telling women yes, everybody, love a woman who's independent, get their own money, blah, blah.

Speaker 1: 4:32

But as much as we don't want to hear a woman need a man and a man need a woman. Well, that's how, traditionally, we can't say, like he said, can't say this. That's how it's supposed to be, but it's not like that, no more. You know what I'm saying. It's not because a woman feels as if she can do, and a woman can do whatever she can do, but when it comes to being a family, a woman can be a daddy. No, you can't be a daddy. But they think they can, though. Hold on, hold on. Jalen Can't do what we do. And this is not to say that not equal is less than being. Not equal is not less than they think that, like we said about the duties, they think, when you give them that title, that that's making her less than who she say she is.

Speaker 1: 5:19

Oh, you want me to cook and clean. Yeah, I want you to cook and clean, because I just went out here and did this meal and did this 12, which you not about to do. I'm up in the middle of the night knocking this 12 out, which you not about to do. You know, like I tell my wife you come pick me up from a 16 in the rainstorm, we catch a flash getting out there? I ain't either. I'm calling AAA. I'm calling AAA them guys over there for the kids. Oh see.

Speaker 1: 5:46

But see, as we've said, times have changed because where you work at and where we work at, we work with women, and so you got a lot of them working the same shifts that we're working now. They're out there doing the heavy lifting, just like we are, you know. So what do you tell that woman? She, the toughest woman in the court, what we call them, the court, the one we call the man at work, the woman of steel, that's good. But also being a woman of steel and if you have a man of steel, I'm saying a working steel man, whatever industry you still got to know your role. Regardless, your role is needed and I'm honest, because you go to the mill. You just did a 16.

Speaker 1: 6:25

If you came here, your son didn't eat, your wife didn't cook you none, the clothes weren't washed, you would be like man. Now I got to do this. We got problems. That's a problem. As a team, everybody got a role, everybody got a role. I need to speak with Madison. I agree with everything that he's saying, but we're living in a different time right now, but the roles are supposed to be the same. They're supposed to be the same, but that's what society being suckered into it's saying. The times have changed, but the roles shouldn't. It shouldn't the roles, man.

Speaker 1: 6:57

You ain't putting me in no skirt, man. Nah, I'm a cook, I'm a clean man. You know what I'm saying. I mean, this is how I cook. I do it. I even put the clothes in the washer and I hold them. It don't matter. Again, it's a team thing. If you put the clothes in the washer, I'll go downstairs and go get them. I'm knocking my own clothes. I mean me personally like I wash my own clothes. I wash and fold my own. Like I say she do hers. We got Jeremiah doing his by himself now, because that's responsibility.

Speaker 1: 7:24

Yeah, yeah, yeah, back in the day, mama used to wash everybody's clothes, my mama and grandma. She was washing everybody's clothes. But see, now today's woman is looking at that. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's why I'm saying things have changed. And how can you look when granddaddy and pops took care of mama? Because they're not worried about it. They ain't seeing that aspect, because a lot of them, if you talk to some women about some of these things, a lot of them are saying the way that they see mommy and daddy come up. They don't want to do that. Like it was degraded, like I said, mama getting degraded, nah, like, nah, I don't want to submit to no man to that type of capacity or whatever. So I don't want to, I'm not fit to do all that stuff that my mama was doing and the way that my daddy you know what I'm saying the way she treated my daddy. I don't want to be like that. Yeah, yeah, and so that's so.

Speaker 1: 8:17

Let me ask this, and this is my perception like we got a big miscommunication with this word submit. Look today's woman thing. Submit means like we're in a wrestling match, like you tapping the floor, like you giving up to me. In my experience, man, submit. I might be wrong, but to me the word submit in the bible means to respect. You know what I'm saying. You respecting your man as the head of the household. They in class together. So you figure, man, if a woman don't respect you as the head of the household, well, honor and respect is, you know, they in class together.

Speaker 1: 8:46

So you figure, man, if a woman don't respect you as the head of the household, ain't no way in hell she gonna follow. She should not follow. And that's the point, that's what I'm trying to say is, if I'm not giving you nothing to honor, to respect, then why are they gonna follow you? You see what I'm saying. Like, why are they going to follow you? You see what I'm saying. Like I got to be able to put something out there or I have to be walking in a direction. What she looking back, like I said they observe. She looking back like you know what? Okay, I see where this is going. You know what I'm saying. I like that direction, but because, as a man, as we're talking about, as men, we ought the head, not the tail, above and not beneath, but men, men, us I'm not saying you two or me, but in general, we have become weaker and so, by becoming weaker, a lot of men have been put out of position and we have allowed a lot of stuff.

Speaker 1: 9:44

That's going on right now. What we're talking about, with how these women think, with their mindset, we have allowed them to come in and take off. It's over money, it's all because of money, money, Materialistic it is. Social media has made a platform to where, if that woman makes more than you as a man, you're nothing. You submit some time. As a man, you're nothing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, in reality, if a man makes $60,000 and that lady makes $75,000, does that make him less of a man? Absolutely not. Like my wife, in general and we've talked about this a lot my wife made more money than me for a very long time. So it's not about making more money. Making more money, it's the mindset that they have. Are they going to hover that over?

Speaker 1: 10:26

You, like I'm the one bringing home the bacon, you know, and fry it up in a pan. I tell you what to do, and so a lot of men have sidestepped because they feel you step aside and so now you're letting the woman run the household and you, because if you don't set no boundaries and say you know what, I don't care if you make more money, I'm still ahead. Look, look, look, take it off. That, take a strong time. You know you got to have a stomach for that. Like you said, you make a 60, she make a 75, 80. You got it. Just say easy, honey, you got to have a stomach to be able to control her. But it's not about control, not control her as a person.

Speaker 1: 11:09

I'm talking about the situation. Yeah, yeah, because, like you say, I'm still a man. You ain't telling me when to come in. You ain't telling me when to eat. You ain't telling me who to hang with. Hey, jay, this is my thing. None of that. I do the stick. I ain't getting stoned, she do the taking. So that's what we gonna distinguish this through I'm the one humping, you the one taking the humps. You see that I'm the man, you the woman.

Speaker 1: 11:34

But also, it's a difference when, if you made okay, if a dude made 60, let's say his wife made 100. 120. 120, right Now, say you're getting a meal. Now you make 140. Now, most 90% of men who, if you make 60 and you're trying to strive to get to that 140 or whatever that man be like man, you know what? Now I can do this for my old lady. I can do this. That was me. You're right, that was me.

Speaker 1: 12:06

But if the man was making $100 and the woman was making $60 and then the roles changed and she made that $140 and he's still making $100, that woman would tell you hey, you need to do this, not even that. Hey, yeah, no, I know where you're going. I'm not saying how. Oh, you know what. He's been holding it down. I can treat him.

Speaker 1: 12:25

Don't get me wrong, I know there's women out there that will do that. You see what I mean. The majority of the women will be like, hey, I'm making $140. You need to match it or come above. But that man who make that $60, he already dialoguing in his mind every day. Once he get that, man, I'm making $140. I, it's mine every day.

Speaker 1: 12:43

Once you get that, you know what I'm saying. Man, I'm making $140,000. True, true. And then, jay you, I can take this off while I can do this. Look, jay man, you story man, because I swear that's what I went through. I was at the boat making $27,000. Man, I made months in the meal, Probably even more.

Speaker 1: 13:00

And my mentality was what you just said. Man, when I do this, when I get in this, I'm going to do this for the old lady. We're going to bust this move. We're going to move it like this. But, like you said, I reversed that role. Will she think the same way? But now it's still you the head, because if she don't get that buck 40 and go get old boy that's making that buck 40 and 60, she just showed you that before and you just really didn't pay attention to it. But at the same time, same thing. You know what I'm saying. You can make it bad, dj, and some do Some do, some do Some do, some do.

Speaker 1: 13:35

So now I've been struggling. Now I'm getting my money right Now I can go out and go do some of the things I want to do, but again that determined that man, yeah, want to do. But again that determined that man, yeah, everything is determined with the mindset of the man and the woman. You see, because I used to have the one out there that got that bag. So what they had now they had Pepe's, they had Pepe, she looking at me and everybody going to Pepe because they know that's what a change up to.

Speaker 1: 14:04

But everybody not like Rick and that's like it's a hot spot, it's been a little change up to whatever, but everybody not like Rick and that's like, when I get this bag, I'm going to get the house in order. I'm going to get the house in order, my wife going to be straight for all the times that we did struggle. You see what I mean Everybody not like C, but also as that you want to take care of the house, but also you got, you got to know, as a man, the times that you was down Mm-hmm. So do I want to go get me a ride? If a man tell you he don't like a car or some type of toy, a bike or whatever, something's wrong with that man. Yeah. So if you make it 60, yeah, you want to make sure you get all that in order. But you also want to go get that whip.

Speaker 1: 14:40

And if you want to put some shoes on there, I'm going to go back to the old hood and hit that corner. I'm going to put some. Hey, this is something my old man told me a long time ago. May he rest in peace. He told me this a long time ago. He said look here, man. He said, if you work, always treat yourself to something.

Speaker 1: 14:57

And, like you said, I didn't work 80 hours or what we do 120, 130 hours. Why am I not going to get me something, all this hard work that I did? Now, I ain't saying that I'm going to go out there and spend and go get a car every time I get paid or whatever. But whether I want some ice cream, a big hamburger, some gym shoes, that's another thing. With us, when I walk outside, I want to have something nice on my feet Fresh out the box most of the time. But you got to see who put that woman first. They going to go to work and do all the leg work and go give it to her and let her take care of everything. But also, I ain't doing that. What type of man, charlie, my butt's nice. I'm going to call him a sucker first, but look, I'm going to take care of it. No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1: 15:56

He was working at the post office, he in the middle now, but he was working at the post office. He had this little dame and he was just footing all the bills. I mean, his check come in, it's going out just like that to her hands. So he was telling me. He said, man, I watched my daddy do it, chub. I watched my daddy do it, man, with my moms. I said well, bro, you don't know how your daddy felt when his cousin pulled up in that new car. You don't know how your daddy felt when he kicking him with the fellas and his partner came back from this trip. Now he can't do all that because he studied porn into this chick. Like you said, I can't even buy ice cream, some shoes or whatever. I got partners like that. Hey, you know that would just pour into a chick. Hey, there's nothing to it. You don't always gotta let the right hand know what the left hand doing, because I'm gonna tell you just like this Any woman that's making money or whatever, they put some money to the side.

Speaker 1: 16:50

They got a stash. You need to do all of those. They got some rainy day money just in case something happens. And the men need to do it also. We need to, but we don't do it most of the time and most men don't do it because they give their all. They give their all, or a lot of. I'm going to be honest. And who's losing everything when you do that? If something happened to you? Everything going down, a lot of it. So who's going outside? But a lot of men don't have money down. So who went outside? And we ain't got no staff? And then we got to go back home tomorrow. I refuse to go back home tomorrow, jalen, that's true, that's true.

Speaker 1: 17:25

And I ask my partners this and my brother this. All the time. I say what's the biggest killer of a relationship? You know, of course, the woman going to say what they're going to say Cheating. Nah, ain't the biggest Finances, finances is gonna say cheating, nah, ain't the biggest thing, that ain't finances. Finances is the biggest thing in any relationship. That's gonna send you to the judge. Hey, man, I can't do her no more, I can't do him no more. Yeah, the money, the money, you know.

Speaker 1: 17:45

But the other one, the main one, and this is from us to them, man, when I seen, when, lord man, you can't get up, you ain't never heard a woman say, she fell back and look, hey, what did I tell you back in the day? What If a woman go out there and cheat a woman that loves you, she cheating to replace you, like we're, like you said the other day, we were talking about that one. Yeah, go ahead, go ahead and say what you said. Here's the thing A man can go make love to not even make love. Look, he can go hump on that gas tank over there. Who Don't even give a care, don't care what this gas tank name is or nothing, but when a woman you got some women that just let somebody hump on them, but a majority of women if they open up that leg, that's a part of comfort. You know what I'm saying. He got her attention. Some type of way to let this man penetrate her and do all this. Also, here's another thing A lot of times, if your old lady got mad not even got mad, if your old lady got fed up with you today, when you got home, her mama will be there, her cousin, her brother, her daddy, the prayer group, they all helping her pack her stuff, and you know what they're going to say Well, rick, you foaming a good one.

Speaker 1: 19:08

But they're going to say Well, rick, you fumbled a good one. But they're going to tell her Y'all, leave out the dope If you fed up with it. You know what I'm saying. You lost a good woman, or whatever. But if you and your old lady have been going through it all and she wanted to leave, she gets all the support and everything. Now, if you know that y'all went through all this stuff and you get fed up, they're going to say Rick, better take it. Rick, you a hoe. Yeah, rick, you abandoned her. Yeah, I don't know how many kids you got, but you abandoned your kids. Yeah, all that. Yeah, they want to have an obsession with me. All that. Yeah, they want to have an obsession. That's why I'm slapping Boy. You messed up, but listen, hold on. I got to reply, but hold on, go ahead, go ahead.

Speaker 1: 19:49

You said something that I it depends on what you had in life, because you said you're going to slap the pastor, but if you had a pastor, then you would have to slap him. Huh, if you had a pastor, If I had a pastor, if you had a pastor, then you would have to slap him. Yeah, I, I'm going to keep the house together. No, but that's because you're out of place. Yeah, because if he said that he's going to smack the pastor, then that means that he don't have one. Yeah, so a lot of times we're out of place because the guidance that we get is from, like you said earlier, social media, youtube, out there on the streets, and it's reality. So it's a mindset and it's reality TV, yeah, I watch B&B.

Speaker 1: 20:30

When Charles I can't remember the mama name when they start going into what Snoop Dogg was a pastor, look how he start pressing up on them. But look at Snoop Dogg, he was a dead mama. You know what I'm saying? He's not Snoop Dogg, no, no. But as a pastor, look at his ways though. True, but as a pastor, look at his ways though. True, his ways were different. I'm glad you brought that up, bro, because that's valuable. His ways were different, because that's true. You know there's some reality, because somewhere somebody in a relationship went through what his parents went through. You know what I'm saying. She went to the pastor. Pastor, looking at her ass, honey, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1: 21:07

But here's the part where we talked about from the jump. You gotta be the head of the house, should? Your wife shouldn't be going to pastor first. She should be coming to you first saying we need to go to pastor past. And I ain't disrespecting no pastor out here, pastor, pastor, steve. I'm telling you, man, like I said, we agree to disagree on that. Because here's the thing, here's the thing, I'm offended, I'll be just like Charles at it. Here's the thing. You said what you did, what like. See, I'm on the defense now. Here's the thing. Because he was a crooked pastor. But here's the thing, if you were doing what you were supposed to be doing, then she wouldn't have to go to the pastor.

Speaker 1: 21:54

But see, here's the thing. See, ain't nothing perfect, bro. We're going to hit some potholes. We're going to hit some potholes. We're going to hit some bumps. Yeah, I'm trying to talk to you, right, it ain't working. It ain't working.

Speaker 1: 22:07

Okay, so now I can't go to the man of God, so you're going to get mad at me because I'm going to try to get some spiritual guidance and some spiritual counseling. Yeah, so you're going to say that you're going to get mad at me because I'm trying to get. You know what? I'm saying, something that you're not trying to take me to Because you're not there. You, because you're not there, You're not going. No, that's me. You can't say he can't fix you. We can go together, but you don't want to go. They're going to fix, but you don't want to go. See, here's the thing. That's a different story. Okay, that's a different story. Now, if you're not willing to go, okay, if you ain't willing to go to them.

Speaker 1: 22:44

I got something to say about that. Everything in life, this is life. Now, this is an individual. Everything is an individual thing. Right, with men and women, it's individual. But see, when you put that together, baby, this is a circle. Hold on, rick, it's a full circle and nothing comes inside of that circle. That's not inviting.

Speaker 1: 23:02

Let me tell you something. Do you agree with that? No, I don't agree with that. You want to know why I don't agree with that it's because of this. Let's say, if my wife, I won't go to the pastor, but she don't, and so she don't go.

Speaker 1: 23:15

So here's where the individual thing come in. Because she may not want to live and go to heaven, don't mean that I don't have to want to live and go to heaven. So because you don't want to go to heaven, you're going to tell me that I'm wrong, because at the end of the day because at the end of the day, everything is individual, because the book does say every knee shall bow, every tongue shall confess and every man will be judged by his own deeds. So this is an individual thing. This ain't nothing. This ain't nothing about you. This ain't nothing about you. But if I want to live and you don't, you can't tell me that I can't live because you don't want to.

Speaker 1: 23:51

So do you feel like if you went to the pastor? Do you feel like you care more about the relationship if she didn't want to go? I care more about my point in it. You see what I'm saying. So I want advice for the betterment for me. If he can tell me something that can go back and try to reconcile this whole situation, then fine. What if he don't. What if? Who don't? I'm saying what if you, the pastor, tell you something? You go back. You tell your lady Now, what if it doesn't reconcile? If she don't reconcile, then that's on her. That's why I say it's a personal thing. So you still try to stay Something you can try to stay, but if it ain't meant to be, it just ain't meant to be.

Speaker 1: 24:28

Do you believe that some people grow apart? They do grow apart. A lot of relationships man is catch and release. A lot of people grow apart. But then also I don't like the fact when people say oh man, you and this person was together, whatever the case may be, now y'all have a kid, so y'all should stay together for the kids. No, don't ever say that for the kids, because I see a lot of people, I know a lot of people I went to school with, graduated with. Their parents stayed together until that kid was 18. The second that that kid went to school went off to college, that first fall break, when they came back home, mom and daddy said hey, let's talk to you on the phone. We about to get a divorce. However long that that situation went on, that was a miserable marriage.

Speaker 1: 25:11

It is so now both parents. It's common. Now, both parents, it's common, but it's miserable. It's common, so do you have to go through that? No, you don't. You don't have to. I don't have to live. I don't have to be miserable for 10 years just to raise the kid that's going to grow up and hate me anyway, or a kid that's going to grow up and live their own life. You know what I'm saying Like, and so that's the thing that you know.

Speaker 1: 25:35

That we get to too a lot of times is that we do things for the kids because we want to raise our kids the right way, to be better than us and to give them the best things in life, or whatever, whatever. And I think in this day and age we're overdoing it. Hold on, hold on. We're overpowering Satan on a lot of things. Stay right there, let's rewind. See, you say I'm not going to be miserable, I'm not having a lot. You can.

Speaker 1: 26:04

That goes back to me kind of reversing the roles. That's a woman's escape goal. I'm not going to be miserable, I'm going to hit this door. I'm looking at it as more as if I stay to 18, 19 years old. That's the sacrifice that I had to take as a man to show my child, or kids, a two-parent household. I'm not doing that Because here's the thing. Here's the thing If you stay 18 years to show your kid a two-parent household, your kid, the household that your kid see, could be horrible. Yeah, because every day I know some people like that right now. Yeah, yeah, true, true, true. We work with people at the mill. Yeah, I Listen, I tell you to work with people at the field.

Speaker 1: 26:42

I know a lot of guys who will do a 16 every day so they ain't got to go home Because they don't want to be home. Yeah, they don't want to go home. How do you think that makes that kid feel? Man, I can't even see my dad. My dad don't want to be here because he tired, because him and mama always argue. So, yeah, that's their perspective. Why not just split to do this many doubles? She ain't got nobody to argue with and your kid can be happy going to your house and hers.

Speaker 1: 27:04

I'm going to do 18 years to try to show you something. What am I showing you? I'm showing you a dysfunctional household and then that kid resent you. In the end it's dysfunctional. He resent both. It's going to be. Yeah, he's dysfunctional. Well, not both, because I'm looking at these little boys. Man, I got a lot of nephews. Man, and we were talking about this earlier. Women is so clutched on these boys. True, they clutched on these boys. So go out that door, that little dude. You know that daughter, she might go to where she going to need her man, true, you know your sons can do the same thing. It just depends we go back to what we were talking about earlier. It takes longer, it depends on the mindset. That'll take longer for the boy. It'll take longer for the boy. It'll take longer for the boy, like right now.

Speaker 1: 27:49

If anybody asks me, they say well, c-man, why you ain't doing this? Because for one, I got a peaceful household. That's for one. For two, I love my wife. Three, ain't no, that good enough for me. That's going to make me walk away from my sin right now. Period. Why? Because if I did something to break up this household, he would never recover from that, because it was my fault. What? I would say this, and that would be the example.

Speaker 1: 28:17

Nobody in this day and age we all grown, I feel no woman could take a man from another woman. No man could take another woman from another man. That party has a own mind to do that. You also have relationships to where it's just not working. Y'all both know that it's not working. Y'all both know that it's arguing. You both know that it's not working. Y'all both know that it's arguing. You both know that it's just bad. Y'all trying but it's draining. So am I going to be a bad dad Because I say you know what?

Speaker 1: 28:52

It just ain't going to cut it. I mean, whether you're married or whether you're in a relationship and I've been in a relationship where you just feel trapped and I believe women feel like this all the time when you can't make no move, you ain't happy. Yeah, like you said, that's scary. You got that donkey. You got that donkey knocking it out, but because you having sex, it's still not feeling. It's still not like you said Exactly. It's still not feeling the other voice. I work in the steel mill that I'm still not feeling the other void. I work in the steel mill. That's scary. I ain't feeling the other void If I do 16 hours and I got to come here and argue with you, I got to come here and do this and that you really think I want to have sex.

Speaker 1: 29:32

You really think I want to be here. Look, if we arguing all the time and I'm broke, and two times I don't know what to do, what am I supposed to say when? What am I supposed to say when I'm broke? I ain't got no time. I ain't got no time for this and that. And okay, you broke and your woman? I'm frustrated. You're telling some money man, how frustrated do you think she is? And you coming home as me? That just be straight up as me. Working 16, working 72, 84 hours a week. What do you need as a man? I need a release. I'm going to be honest, though I need a release. You know what I'm saying. I may want to watch a movie. I may want. You know what I'm saying. It's simple things, yeah, that get looked over, and so that's what we're talking about. The void you can knock the stuffing out of it, but are you filling a void? Simple ain't attractive. No more. In 90 days, she won't go on a trip.