When Art Imitates Swinging

How do movies correlate to an open relationship/swinging lifestyle and what can they teach us about relationships as a whole? Find out the answers to these questions and more as D and Monet continue to share their thoughts on the lifestyle and how to navigate all it's challenges

Transcript

0:22

Hey everyone. Welcome to the Let's Be Open podcast. I am Monet, one of your hosts, and I am here with my partner, Daniel. Hey, Daniel. How's it going? Hello. How's it going? Pretty good. In the Christmas spirit here. I've got the house all decorated and my Christmas pajamas. Yeah, I'm ready to have sexy talk, so let's go in your Christmas jammies Oh, I see your Christmas cup, too Actually, these were from on Thanksgiving. Oh, were they but like little trees no, but They're actually I don't know what the hell these are. But can you guess what holiday drink I'm drinking? Drinking. Alcoholic, of course. Of course. Jack Daniels, right? You're a whiskey guy. I am, but that's not what I'm drinking. It's a Christmas drink. Eggnog? Yeah. Yeah. Oh! Every year. Lucky guess. Every year we go to Costco and we buy two things of the Kirkland eggnog, which I love. And yeah. So I just poured myself a drink and, like I said, Oh, what did you mix it with? Oh, it's already mixed. It has everything in there like bourbon and yeah, it's like their special blend So it's very delicious. Yeah, okay, highly recommend it. Maybe I might take it to the christmas party Oh, there you go. I'm not an eggnog fan though, so I'm gonna pass on that. Yeah. Sorry. I can respect that. So what did we have to do? Wow, we had some. Sexy fun over the weekend. Of course you did. What else is new? I know. It's not every weekend. Come on. Every other maybe. Just kidding. Anyway yeah, we met this couple in our writing group, which is on hiatus, FYI. So footnote there, but we met them. Yeah, because the founders are taking some classes to get some licenses and things like that. So plus the weather, anyway, of course, so yeah, it's on hiatus hopefully till next May, but anyway, I'll keep you updated on that and our audience to anyway. So we met this couple really nice couple. But very shy as well. Both of them are pretty shy. Whenever I see shy people, I always tone it down, so I don't want to scare them. Try to tone it down, but at the same time, I make an effort to at least greet and try to engage in conversation a little bit. Hopefully draw them out. Yeah one of the last times we had seen them they had invited us to their annual Ugly Sweater Christmas party. So we're like, wow, we were very flattered that they would invite us because we hadn't really talked with them that much. And so what, when we got together with them this past weekend, it was not the ugly sort of Christmas party. That one is forthcoming, but we didn't want to get together with them before that night because we hadn't spent a whole lot of time with them. So that's what we did. We went up and had dinner with them and did a lot of. tAlking a lot of chatting and then yeah, some sexy time after that. So it was good. It was a good time. Yeah. Now, how did you meet this? How did you meet this couple? Just out of curiosity. Yeah. From the motorcycle riding group. That's right. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. How much eggnog have you had to drink, sir? It was pretty good. I pretty much downed it. So it's really, Oh, okay. There we go. Good, as it's always nice to make new friends in the lifestyle. Sounds like you guys had a good time. Yeah, we did. Very good. Yeah, what about you? As for us, it's just been like I said, decorating the house taking these, the kids to all of these Christmas activities, looking at Christmas lights and, um, sometimes it can be a little bit of a hassle, loading the car, unloading, but the look on their faces are just so worth it. Yeah, exactly. So that's where we're at. But again everything looks good. December 16th. Looks like I'm going to swing our hearts Christmas party. So yeah, I always call it. Yeah, you're right. Sorry. I know. It was called swinger swing. Yeah, so we'll be there. I'm looking forward to it. Can't wait. Yeah, that'll be great. And you guys are still going. I think we had another engagement pop up that we, yeah, we had to go to. Yeah. So friends of friends. Some friends that we made that we met through some other friends, non lifestyle people. But it's a great party because to be honest, it's the same sex couple. Gentlemen, they know how to throw a party, even for vanilla. You're not going to see me on my birthday. I thought we were. I'm going to have to make it up to you somehow. I'm sure. All so should we get into tonight's key question? Yes. Okay. Party question. Okay. So tonight's key party question is, would you like to be watched at a party or do you like to watch other people? I would prefer if you answer this question first. Okay. I Would say I would like to watch people. I'm a people watcher. And so it's funny because we've had this conversation before, my wife and I, and. I like to observe, and I like to watch. Obviously, but my wife, she likes to be watched, so yeah, so that's something she wants to check off her list when we go to this party in a couple of weeks is she would like to play and hopefully. Be watched and so that's on the agenda. So I'm going to have to rethink my schedule. I'm just saying I'd be surprised. All right. So now it's your turn. My answer is yes. I like both. A can attest to the fact that we've been at parties and people will shut the door or they'll draw the curtains and I say, Hey, stop being so selfish. Open the door! This is a swinger party. Yeah. Anyway, so I do enjoy watching. Yeah it's just that whole energy, the interaction people have and yeah, it's very erotic to watch. And then of course I do like to be watched. That's. Fun to have an audience, even usually if I'm being watched, I know people are watching. I don't make eye contact with them, but just the fact that knowing that people are watching. Yeah, that's, that's erotic too. And it's in a different way. Yeah. But still very erotic. I think I need a little bit more experience playing because I tend to get distracted very easily. So if I know there's like a group just sitting watching I could see myself getting distracted because this kind of has happened before in the past where maybe my wife and her partner might finish early, right? And they're just watching. Myself and my partner play and it's knowing the back of my mind, they're watching us could be a little bit distracting. Yeah, I'm going to go with watching for now and hopefully a little more comfortable down the road. That might my answer might change. Got you. Got you. I like that. I like the fact that you're open to the growing part. I was going to ask you in regards to that situation that you gave, do you think you're distracted because it's your wife or would you be distracted with? anyone watching? That's a very good question. I think, I don't know, because it's I've never had anyone just watch. So maybe it was a fact that my wife was watching. buT yeah, that's a good question. Never really thought about that. I'll let you know when it happens. Something to consider. Exactly. That'll be fun. Yeah. That'll be good. All right. What's tonight's topic? It's a very interesting topic, and I can't even recall exactly how I came up with the idea. I know I was talking with A about a situation, again, can't recall. And for some reason one of my all time favorite movies came to my mind. And I started thinking, oh! Yeah, I can see a correlation. I can see using this as an analogy. It is an older movie, so maybe some of our audience may not have watched it. But I definitely encourage you to take the time to watch it. It is called The Shawshank Redemption. Are you familiar, Dee? I've never seen it, but I am very familiar. I know who's in it. I know the story right behind it. I've just never seen the movie. Yeah. So highly recommend. Yeah. Yeah, so it's all my, it's just, yeah. So it's one of your favorite movies? It's on my to-do list to watch. Yeah. I would say in for sure, in my top five, maybe even in my top three. All time favorite movies. Yeah, so spoiler alert that's going to be spoiler alert So if you haven't watched it, maybe you want to watch the movie first and then listen to the podcast I don't know but either way. All right. All right. I'm leaving So but anyway, so again, it's a story of a man, his name's Andy Dufresne. That is the main character and he is a sentence to prison. And the analogy that I thought of is he's going into this. place that's unknown to him, some place he's never been before. It's unfamiliar to him and even when he arrives, he probably doesn't realize that really it's a subculture. It's a whole subculture of its own. It has its own lingo. It has its own rules that are written, that are unwritten, that are spoken, that are unspoken. And I thought to myself, that's a lot what it's like when we first get into the lifestyle, when we decide we're gonna come into it. We don't really know what to expect. Are there rules? It's very true. There's terminology, right? Yeah, so I hope that our audience does appreciate as I expound on this example. Like I said, Andy Dufresne is the main character. He's sentenced to prison. And he meets, obviously, a cast of characters, right? One of the first persons that he meets is a guy named Red. And Red is the man who can get things. Even though they're in prison, right? At least in the movie, so he can get things. I saw Red as somebody in the lifestyle who's well connected. Somebody who knows people already and who knows the lay of the land, so to speak. Maybe they're familiar with clubs, they're familiar with house parties, which ones are good, which ones to avoid, and probably can introduce you around to people and places. So we all need a Red. In our lifestyle journey. Someone's going to help us along. Do you have a red in your life? Yeah, I'm looking right at her right now. Oh, D. You're such a flatterer. That's why you and A are always our wingman when we go to these parties. Yeah. Yeah. And that's something that we enjoy. Like I've said before, here on the podcast. I wish somebody would have taken us under their wing, early on that probably would have helped. So yeah, anyway, so red person who's well connected, then there is a gentleman and he's the guy that's Already been in prison like a long time, like 40 years or whatever, old guy, very experienced, very knowledgeable, very low key. I actually equated that to the OG swingers talk about being familiar with the lay of the land. But what I have found in the one, some of the ones I met, not all some, they're very set in their ways and their ideas of what the lifestyle is. And they really don't want it to change. They don't want it to modernize. So anyway, that's what I thought about Brooks. That is the Brooks in our lifestyle journey. And then there's another guy who's a sub character. His name's Tommy and he's a slick, cocky, lash in the pan guy. He makes his entrance, ruffles things up. But then before you know it, he's gone and in the lifestyle. There are definitely people like that. They make a lot of noise They're very flashy very flirty You know trying to get with every woman that they can or every dude that they can But then all of a sudden they're gone. So they're just a flash in the pan. They really didn't contribute anything Maybe we had an experience with them. Maybe we didn't But they're just in and out real quick pun intended Have you ever had a flash in the pan not that I could think of that's half of my head I'm trying to think Yeah Relational right? Yeah. Yeah. So here's the thing like we've not the Partying type. I would say majority of our experience so far has been dates setting up like a dinner date happy hour date. And usually I don't know if it's just how things worked out or. This is how, who, where we attract, but it's been mostly couples who are like in the same boat we are that don't have a lot of time, who are moving at their own pace. That's what you would say. So yeah, I haven't had my own slick yet. Yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't say I recommend that necessarily, but it does happen. Yeah, it does happen. So the biggest thing I wanted to emphasize, and here's really the spoiler alert for the movie, in case you haven't seen it, so it is a story of a prison break. So this. character, Andy Dufresne, our main character, he is very patient, very methodical. He realizes that there's an opportunity for him and he takes that opportunity, but he's very patient. He has to be because of the way he breaks out of prison. So what happens is he has to, in order to make his escape, crawl through a sewer, raw sewage, 500 yards of raw sewage. That's a lot of shit, right? That's a lot of shit. So I was thinking, because I often talk about the work that's involved, right? About the introspection, about the conversations we're going to have with our spouse, our potential partners. There are issues that are going to arise that we get to deal with, jealousy, insecurity FOMO body issues, aging issues, whatever it is. It's different for all of us and sometimes we can go for a while and everything's cool and then all of a sudden something happens. Guess what we realize, oh, it's an issue I need to deal with. To me that's the analogy. Even though that was so grueling and we can't even imagine that filth that is represented in that film. That's our issues. But at the other end of our issues, at the other end of that pipeline that Andy had to go through is freedom. And until you experience that for yourself. You cannot imagine how liberating it is to your own relationship, to you as an individual. You don't have to stifle yourself in front of your spouse, your most significant person in your life. You don't have to stifle your personality, your desires, your kinks. Because you've built your relationship, you've put in the work, and it's hard work. It can be ugly, there can be disagreements, there can be, the brink of breakups. It's a lot to deal with. But the freedom that we get to experience at the end? Unbelievable. Yeah, that's a great analogy. I totally agree with what you just said. It's It can be scary. It can be, like I said, it's not going to, it's not going to be easy. Like you said, it's you might, it's going to require a lot of patience, a lot of listening, a lot of communication with your partner, but once you guys are on the same page, it's going to be a beautiful thing. Something you both, share and do together. So yeah, I think that's a good analogy. I would totally agree with you. Yes. And. I was going to say that, um, yeah, the freedom is just unbelievable because again, we're taught in our society that if you do these things, it's going to, end your relationships going to tear you apart when we know, it draws you closer to your partner in unbelievable ways. You're just vulnerable. You're yourself. Yeah, and you're just unstoppable once you guys are on the same page and you guys encourage each other to foster your desires to, share with me, what are you thinking? Oh, let's make that happen. How can we make that happen? And so many people When they start on their lifestyle journey, they think it's all about the sex. And once you've been in after a while, you realize the sex is just the bonus. It's really the growth you experience as an individual. And then that affects the growth within your partnership. And then when two people are authentic and vulnerable, they can be authentic and vulnerable with other people as well. And show other people how to grow in that way as well. So it's really about those things and the sex is the bonus. Does that make sense? It does make sense. I'm trying to pull up something. Shoot. I, there was a podcast I was listening to the other day and, and I can't find it right now. But basically they interviewed another couple and they were talking about their journey and how they got started in the lifestyle and how the husband was saying like he was. He was really into participating in this lifestyle. He was excited, couldn't wait, shared it with his wife. But then of course she had her doubts and she was hesitant. And it took a lot of patience on his part. And they actually went to counseling to see if this is something that they can do together. And they wound up going to on a vacation, I want to say, I think it was desire, but Yeah. When everything was booked, tickets, hotel, everything bef Think a day or two before they left, they sat down and they wrote like a contract. Just so they were on the same page now. Didn't mess. They made it clear that just because it wasn't on the contract, it doesn't mean it was off the table. They just. maYbe they just had to maybe make room for discussion if something approached, but that was their first step into the lifestyle. And I just thought that was a really good idea. It makes sense to, you want to, how many times have we said, we want to be on the same page as your partner. They're literally we're on the same page because they wrote on a piece of paper what, their expectations would be, and they went at their own pace, yeah. Yeah, so everything you're saying about this movie has nothing to do with sexuality. It has nothing to do with swinging, or whatever. Exactly, it doesn't. No. But, you can relate, because, yes. There's been many times where my wife and I have gone. To a party or on a date and we're having a good time and it's can't share this with anybody. I can't share this with my friend, family because, of judgment and stuff. So it's I'm in my own little world and we're in the lifestyle. And so from what you're saying and what the movie represents a lot of similar, yeah, you can you can compare and contrast. Yes. Both yeah, both worlds. I thought it was an amazing analogy and the biggest point I wanted to make is that was the only path to freedom for Andy Dufrene. And really, that is the o. The only way to make it to the freedom is through all the issues. But if you're willing, again, to do the work, I say it all the time, if you're willing to do the work, you will get through it. Again, there's so many resources, videos, podcasts, books, audio books. It doesn't matter. There's no excuse these days for people to remain not growing. Even one of the lines in the movie is get busy living or get busy dying. And that again, something very true in the lifestyle as well. You may start out all gung ho, but once you hit your first road bump, if you're just gonna throw in the towel, you know what? Throw in the towel. Because you don't have what it takes to do the work. Yeah. But the rewards are well worth it on so many levels. Yeah. And sometimes unfortunately things don't work out.'cause I've, we've come across couples that, they've gone into lifestyle. It's just. It broke them apart and they went their separate ways and, it's just, you could tell looking back on him, the warning signs and red flags were there, they weren't communicating, yeah, exactly. They were living two different lives, even though they lived in the same house. It was two different lives two different. Yeah, so you can see the writing was on the wall looking back, but right So again, if this is something you're gonna do, you got to be open and got to be honest there's no way around it and some people could look at that couple and say oh it was the lifestyles fault No, it wasn't the lifestyles fault. The lifestyle just revealed what was already there The issues were already there. They were just exposed and magnified. Yes, the lifestyle does magnify those issues because of the circumstances that we put ourselves in. So they're magnified. But the issues were already there. If there wasn't an issue, there would be no magnification. But it was magnified and they couldn't resolve the issues, yeah. Unfortunate, it would have happened either way. This is yeah Say like it's gonna yeah, it was gonna happen. Eventually Looking back on it. You could totally see right where it was heading, right? Yeah. Yeah, it is what it is and you know on I couldn't relate to because I think I said before in the opening of our first podcast. This is something that I've always been Drawn to the lifestyle and We don't have that flexibility. We don't have our schedules aren't as open as other couples and our time. It's limited. So we don't have the freedom to go out every weekend or go to meet and greets. Exactly. iT can be a little frustrating, but my wife and I have figured a way to yeah, of course, be patient, but then also to like, there's other things we can do of course with each other to make it work, to have a little taste of the lifestyle, there's like toys, dirty talk, et cetera, et cetera. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah like I said, about being on the same page open, honest communication. anD again, I feel like we say that every week, but it's the truth, yeah, that is exactly. Yeah, it's just. It is what it is. Yep. oUt of curiosity out of curiosity do you have a favorite lifestyle movie? I Don't even think I've ever seen a lifestyle movie. Really? Yeah, I'm not huge into porn. I'm very specific about what I like. I'm not talking about porn. I'm actually talking about like a movie about the lifestyle. Okay, take it back. I did see one. A and I watched one. It was a comedy and he's seen other lifestyle related movies and expresses disappointment because of the portrayal and then the people are usually so conflicted and oh I should have done that it was terrible blah blah blah and it destroys their marriage or They confessed it to their spouse. Oh, and maybe I'll forget, so it's always portrayed in a real negative light. So this one was about a young couple who discovers that the girl discovers that her parents are swingers. Those are she's like what it you know, anyway, so they get all curious and stuff and all so the whole movie is about their exploration Trying to get into the lifestyle and figuring it out. Anyway, so it's cute. It's funny We thought that was he thought that was probably Much more realistic movie than the others he's seen Do you know the name of the movie? That was a Mac? I can't recall what it was called. No? Okay. No. If I, yeah, I'll ask him. He'll probably remember it. I'll text it to you. Yeah. You just sent me on a mission, so I'm gonna hunt that down. and it's not an old movie. Maybe two years. I don't know. Not I'm trying to think. The fir first one that comes to mind is the overnight. Have you seen that? Never heard of it. Okay. Who's in it? So it's a I'm terrible with names, but basically it's about a couple with a kid that moves into this new town and the kid meets another kid at school. And so his parents invite them over for a pizza night. And the, those parents had a agenda for that evening and so I don't want to ruin it. I want to spoil it. Yeah. It's it's a lifestyle movie, so I would say it's more like a dark comedy. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. It's because at first I thought, oh yeah, they're gonna. Probably wife swap and, but you don't really see any of that until maybe like the very end for a few seconds. But just their night of adventures, just like I said, it's really dark. So I really did enjoy it. And then there was another one learning more about your partner. There was another one called the, I want to say casserole club. This one takes place like in Palm Springs, like in, I believe the sixties and it's about a women, about a group of women they swap recipes. And so they get together every night. Oh, one, I think it's one day of the week they get together and they bring their husbands and these, everyone makes a a different type of casserole. Wow. You can imagine. As more they do this and more they get comfortable with each other and experimentation takes over and they actually do swap wives for, and it talks about the challenges that they go through that evening and then you see how they do it again. And then again, more challenges, approaches, some couple of people that I swapped now are trying to, the person they played with that night, they're trying to, have secret meetings without their spouse, knowing stuff like that. No, it's actually, if you're looking back on it, that could be like a little bit educational, but yeah. I, I've never heard of it. I only saw it on, I think I saw it on Netflix just once it came across my timeline, watched it and I've never even heard of it or seen it again. But it's a good movie. I, like I said, I highly recommend it. Yeah, it sounds interesting. I check that 1 out. I'm going to bring this. Yeah, you're right though. That's a problem with movies was about the lifestyle. It's they think they have an idea of what it is, but it's really not. It's. Really far fetch. Yeah, very melodramatic. Yeah, negative and I think I brought it up on one of the podcasts that, you see it on TV and so we went to our first party. I'm like, wow, this is nothing like I was on TV. There's actually normal people just like me here at the party. Yeah, exactly. That's refreshing. Yeah. So let me see. Let's type this in real quick. It's funny because we type in swinger movies. Vince Vaughn's movies always pops up swingers, but uh, that's funny. Let me see. Yeah, it's always dramas to and it's yes. Why? Oh, Palm swing. That was a movie. Yeah, we saw I saw it again. This is about a couple that meets another couple of veteran couple if you just put it right and they get married. Teach them the ropes for the night and then yeah, the wife gets really sucked in. And so they it talks about like their journey, how they go about it. There's a very good documentary. If you have HBO Max, I think it's called Max. It's a really good, it's a documentary. It's called there is no I in threesome. Oh, yes. That's a really good documentary. It's about a couple who are in the polyamory swinging lifestyle. And, uh, she talks about their journey. They're engaged. And again, I don't want to spoil anything, but there's like something at the end where I'm like, whoa, did not see that coming again. It's a documentary because, yeah, as it's going on, you're putting the pieces together and I'm like, Oh, I wasn't surprised. I knew that was going to happen. But then at the end, you get caught off guard and you're like, wait, what? And um, again I highly recommend that documentary. It's, Um, very educational, really good, and you can see there's no I in threesome. No I in threesome. Okay. Yeah, there's no I in threesome. And I'm trying to see if there's anything else that I can recommend. I'm just going off this list on IMBD. I think that's it. Oh, okay. Yeah. But, excuse me. But there are, yeah, there are some good Movies out there. If you want to, learn a little bit more about the lifestyle like I said, I would recommend, but I think out of the ones I just met, I just said, there's no, I am three. So it's probably on the top of my list. And then that sounds good. I want to say that one. Yeah, I watched another series. And also reminded me, Okay. Of the lifestyle so a friend of mine turned me on to this one and it was called how to build a sex room Have you seen that? Was that on Netflix? Was it Netflix? It may have been Netflix. I don't recall for sure. My wife watched that and I've never had, I just don't have time to sit down and watch it. Understood. It was like, yeah. She's I can't believe you haven't watched it. But she loved that. Yeah, it was very sweet. It reminded me of, yeah, the lifestyle. Because again, you hear that title, how to build a sex room, right? They make all these assumptions. And then you watch the series, and again, it's about what is happening in the relationship. Why do they want to transform their bedroom? Because they're trying to mend things within their relationship. Anyway, it was great how the therapist, the decorator, therapist, whatever, interviewed the couples and found, what was missing for each of them and then how they could address that. It was a really good show. Very sweet. Yeah, she told me all about it and she raved about it. She loved it. I guess I had to think of things to say, but I guess I'm gonna have to sit down and watch that. Yes. Okay. So he just chimed in and told me the name of the comedy movie that I just recommended. The Unicorn. Okay. I haven't even heard of it. So I'm gonna have to. Put that on the list of things to do. Maybe we should tweet that list out. Or yeah, absolutely. On Twitter. What do you say now? Cause it's called X got to exit out. I don't know. That's true. Do we still say, I don't know. I still say tweet to be honest. Yeah, I know it's called X and just force of habit. That's all. That's what it is. We're going to exit out. Like I said, I'm looking through this and of course I saw the what was it on Playboy? I think it was it called Swing? Did you ever watch that? It was a show? Yeah, it was a show on Playboy TV called Swing. And so all these veteran couples would be at this big gorgeous house in LA and they invite this newbie couple and the counselor, they meet with the counselor. And, they talk about like why they're here, about the relationship, and then they meet the other couples, icebreaker game, questions, drinks, then there's usually like an activity. But basically at the end, you can imagine at the end of the night, everything leads to the playroom. And sometimes they play, sometimes they don't, just, never know, but I'm talking about this. I'll have to look it up because I do not remember the name of the documentary. It was on Hulu, but this was 1 of the 1st sex clubs, or I'm sorry, 1 of the 1st swinger clubs in New York back in the 1970s. And they did a documentary about the person that opened it up, who ran it and how it was very popular and and how it came crashing down. But it was just a fascinating story because I thought I knew all the highlights there is to know about the lifestyle and I had no idea who this person was. I Will I would look it up and we will X it or tweet it on our account. Yeah, it sounds good. Okay. I think that's it for tonight's topic. Oh, I just remembered Swingtown, this was a show on CBS. Oh, I did hear about that show. And I want to say 2009, I believe it was, 2008. This is right when Chara Aston and I started talking about, about the lifestyle and uh, and so she would watch this TV show and unfortunately I liked it, but I thought it could have been done better and the way they did it wasn't the best way. So it didn't last that long, but and you can watch that on Amazon. It's called sweet. It's about a couple in the 70s and about the sexual revolution, right? Yeah, 1970s, alright, so I think that concludes for tonight's topic. Monet has a little surprise for everybody regarding next episode. Do you want to Yes, super exciting. Big news everyone who's listened to us for a while. Neighbor Joe. Finally agreed to come on the show and be interviewed. So if you have any questions for single guys, feel free to either email them or I guess they can write in our comments. Maybe I'll do a page, a single guy. Q& A and feel free to tweet us your questions and we'll put those on our list But I'm very excited to have neighbor Joe coming on. Yeah, I'm looking forward to meeting him. I've heard a lot about him. So Yeah, so I believe so we will record next week and That episode would be I would that will be episode like maybe like around Christmas time give or take and so did you want to try to get another episode and before that, or that would be the last 1 for the year that might be the last 1 for the year. Okay. All right. So we're going to make it extra special extra fun. Yes. Yeah, so yeah, so it should be fun a good way to close out the year. Yeah, exactly All right. Anything else and come to think of it. I think that will be our 10th episode Oh, there you go. I think that would be a nice way to end it for the year All right. Okay. Yeah. So if you need to get a hold of us, you can find us on X do you remember our, bring up our username, it's you can find us on X under at let's be open pod L E T S B E O P E N P O D. Or you can email us at letsbeopenpodcasts at gmail. com. Any emails we'll get, we'll try to get back to you ASAP. Maybe if you could let us know how you're, how you like the podcast. If you have questions any way we could make it better. Please feel free to let us know where obviously this lifestyle. So we are open minded. Yes, that is correct. Any suggestions for topics or even if you disagree with something we said, definitely take that, everyone has their own journey. So we're all here to learn from each other. Absolutely. All right. From Monet and I, you guys have a good week. Talk to you later. Bye.